S07.E24: Sean

[Kid]

I watched the episode last night and it was very disturbing.  People survive terrible childhoods and grow up to be productive members of society. I had a horrendous  childhood and grew up to earn two degrees and have a successful career- a law abiding,  productive member of society. If I get backed into a corner, I come out fighting.  I do not shut down.  I did use food to cope but, As one of my friends shared who was a recovering alcoholic, “my best friend became my worst enemy.”  So, I had to let my “best friend” go.

Sean seemed incapable of fixing what was broken. The thing that has continued to gnaw at me was his refusal to wear clothes. A very simple change that he could’ve made considering the other monumental  changes he had to make.  

And then it hit me, conditioning. If you keep a puppy in a crate and never let it out, even if you later open the door,  the dog will not willingly leave the crate.

Even though I said what I said above about myself, I spent a lot of my childhood confined to a child’s rocking chair reading (not allowed to get up off the chair for any reason). Now that I am retired and do not have a job, I spend a lot of my day in a adult rocking chair, reading. I have to find ways to force myself to get up and do something. I have dogs.  They have to be walked every morning and that is one way. The other way is an act of pure will to get out of the rocker and do something.  My point is, I came to realize it’s the conditioning that I underwent in my formative years and I have to actively and aggressively battle against it - everyday.

Sean’s mother, through her active and affirmative enabling,  kept him confined to a bed, naked, where his every need was taken care of by somebody else. And no matter how much he was helped to be self-sufficient by other people, every time he went home he reverted back to his conditioning.  He felt most comfortable naked trying his best to get other people to clean him and feed him.   I found this to be one of the saddest cases on the show.  

Edited June 13, 2019 by Kid

[missnoa]

5 hours ago, ProTourist said:

I've watched the episode now. My biggest take-away is that Dr. Now's program was never going to work for Sean because Sean couldn't control himself with food when he was at home alone -- especially not once he came into some money. It was impossible for him. Dr. Now should have realized this and should not have kept sending Sean back home to be alone and do the right thing, because everyone knows that he cannot. It's true that Dr. Now could not keep him in rehab indefinitely, but there had to be another solution -- you just can't send a self-destructive addict home alone, even with periodic visits from care assistants.

 Was there no city, county, or state agency that could have taken over to prevent Sean from destroying himself? Adult Protective Services perhaps? Anything at all, other than to let it happen?

I still think, as was discussed in the live chat, that Dr. Now should have had a psych evalulation done for Sean, which I think should have put Sean into a mental health facility. Suicide must be illegal in Texas, and when someone is on track to kill himself due to addiction, the law should be able to step in. As Wanda wrote in the live chat:

And as Julyolo wrote in the live chat:

I agree with both of them.

I appreciate that Dr. Now did not give up on Sean, but what is that expression when you keep doing to same thing time after time but you expect it to have a different outcome? The time Sean was sent home and gained 188 pounds in two months was the beginning of the end -- he needed an entirely different type of treatment by then.

I agree that Sean needed much more intense therapy, but he also refused therapy for a good while, and I think that hurt his situation a lot. I think if he had at least been having regular visits with Dr. Paradise from the point his mom died, it would have at least helped.

But I agree with the person you quoted - Sean wasn't like the vast majority of people we've seen on this show who ARE able to care for themselves and form real relationships with people. He literally could not do that, and he didn't really want to learn, he just wanted someone to take care of him.

[Swiss]

  I think Sean's mind was as crippled as his injured left foot.   I don't think he was capable of seeing any kind of future or a better life for himself..despite talking about it.   After watching just a few minutes of that first visit back to Dr. Now, it was obvious there was some serious mental illness going on with Sean.  It was very sad to see.   Another scene that really bothered me was him sitting alone in his apartment...among the garbage.   Just a very sad episode to watch.  RIP Sean. 

Edited June 13, 2019 by Swiss

[Mothra]

20 hours ago, Concerned said:

It’s hard to interpret gaining 200 and 300 pounds in two months as anything but suicide. Sean had nothing to live for and the only thing that brought him peace was stuffing his face until he died. His IQ was only about 75, but his life force was much weaker. All Dr Now’s hectoring went in one ear, past his dumb face, and out the other ear. His momma screwed him up royally.

Agree, except I can't blame it all on his mother.  No doubt she was doing everything she could to prevent his succeeding but I think Sean's depression was so deep and pervasive that nothing short of hospitalization for psychiatric treatment could have saved him.  The only joy I saw in this poor man's life was in his interactions with his toxic mother; other than her he had absolutely no friend in his life.  He hinted at this when he pointed out to Dr. Now that he was alone, all day long, with nothing to do.  I think he might have subconsciously regained weight so he could be back in the hospital, where he had at least some human interactions during the day.  I think his problem was emotional more than intellectual.

Edited June 13, 2019 by Mothra
too many hes

[Lunula]

14 hours ago, RTS said:

Eh, I mean, the show is there to make money... any money saved would probably just line an executive's pocket.  It wouldn't likely have been spent on more patients.  So I feel like the show has an obligation to do its best once involved, and it did so here... the efforts were pretty heroic.

14 hours ago, AVM said:

You need to look deeper,the show is a show other things go on not filmed or shown  during that time frame ...three years was wasted on Sean ...

Trying to help a fellow human being is not “a waste.” Sean suffered more from mental illness, and I believe some sort of developmental delay, than he did from “obesity.” The primary issue I have with this show is the singular focus on weight, rather than the holistic human being. That’s a different rant...but I am more than annoyed at anyone’s attitude that a human life - even one so seemingly hopeless as Sean - isn’t worth fighting for and deemed “a waste.” 

He wasn’t a serial killer. Or a rapist. Or a pedophile. Or a thief or drug dealer. He had a compulsion to overeat and had no idea that his life was worth something. This man was so disconnected from the rest of the world and I applaud Dr Now and the show for trying.

[AZChristian]

After three years of support and care, maybe Sean was just stubborn, and that's what ultimately caused his death. 

He knew all the right things to say to keep Dr. Now from throwing him out of the program, and he didn't seem so slow that he couldn't understand how to look up the calories (and SALT) in a large sausage and a 2-liter bottle of pop.  

He wanted what he wanted when he wanted it.  He wanted to eat.  He didn't want to maintain a weight that would allow him to even fit into a shower.  He didn't want to pick up after himself.

It's impossible to help someone who refuses to participate in their own well-being.

[junemeatcleaver]

Quote

He didn't want to maintain a weight that would allow him to even fit into a shower.  He didn't want to pick up after himself.

Because he was clinically depressed and had probably been since his injury. 

Not everyone can function with major depression and it's not just the case of the sadz.  For a few people it's a huge obstacle that's hard to get over because you have little motivation, drive and feel utterly helpless.  Maybe his mental issues could have been better managed if he wasn't totally isolated and had a parent that really helped him instead of coddling him and enabling him.  We'll never know now.

[libgirl2]

3 minutes ago, junemeatcleaver said:

Because he was clinically depressed and had probably been since his injury. 

Not everyone can function with major depression and it's not just the case of the sadz.  For a few people it's a huge obstacle that's hard to get over because you have little motivation, drive and feel utterly helpless.  Maybe his mental issues could have been better managed if he wasn't totally isolated and had a parent that really helped him instead of coddling him and enabling him.  We'll never know now.

That is what I said, under different circumstances, who knows how he would have turned out. 

[CousinOliver]

I don’t understand what Sean expected out of a long term care facility.  Unless someone cannot get better, long term care is a road to independent living.  Even some of my relatives (nursing home residents) that were clearly never going to improve got daily physical therapy with a goal (pipe dream) of going home. 

He hated the hospital, especially the diet.  He hated rehab (arguably a long term care facility).  Did he think a nursing home is going to take someone who could be able bodied, then not rehabilitate him/her, thus turning away someone unable to care for himself/herself (or many someones, over time)?  Did he think a long term facility would have giant beds, unlimited food, 24/7 attention, and private rooms, all, somehow, magically leading to weight loss? 

I legitimately don’t know what he was imagining in his mind.  

Honestly, I think he wanted one of those adult baby/caretaker relationships, which are usually considered a sexual kink, but from my (VERY removed) understanding, are usually non sexual.  Not saying that would have been good for him, but I think it’s the closest achievable situation to what HE considered ideal. 

[Mothra]

35 minutes ago, junemeatcleaver said:

Because he was clinically depressed and had probably been since his injury. 

Not everyone can function with major depression and it's not just the case of the sadz.  For a few people it's a huge obstacle that's hard to get over because you have little motivation, drive and feel utterly helpless.  Maybe his mental issues could have been better managed if he wasn't totally isolated and had a parent that really helped him instead of coddling him and enabling him.  We'll never know now.

Standing ovation here.

I think maybe people who have never suffered from clinical depression--as opposed to being sad and upset for a reason, like the death of a loved one or loss of a job--have a hard time understanding how pervasive clinical--not situational, but clinical, with no readily definable (and fixable, or time-healing) "cause," is.  Serious depression affects every part of your life, not least your ability to think and function logically.  It "r******" your thinking in a quite literal way and can cause you to do things that don't make sense to other people.  And it can be very, very difficult to treat, often requiring trials with several different drugs and combinations of drugs until something is found that helps--and that's if you're lucky enough to have a depression that responds to chemical treatment at all.

[dahling]

This episode reinforces my general impression that Dr. N is pretty much a saint.  No, I don't always agree with him, and I think he can be too dismissive of pain, but... he threw everything plus the kitchen sink at Sean. Every tool in the toolbox. He never gave up on him, he never abandoned him. He, of all people, seemed to understand that Sean was utterly alone. 

And yet in the end, some people can't be helped. We suffered a loss this year, a childhood friend; an attorney from a good family - a nice, genuinely good person, who couldn't get past his demons and kick the drugs, despite having had every resource, multiple in-patient rehabs, and every chance in the world. It wasn't enough. He died with a needle in his hand. And he had so much more than Sean. 

I hope Sean's spirit is at peace. He's in a better place now. He has to be, because he was living in hell. 

[cpcathy]

This was indeed incredibly sad, but I agree Sean must be better off. No more suffering. I cannot imagine being a prisoner in your own house (and I have agoraphobia tendencies, but I keep myself very busy while I'm at home) with no friends, family or real hobbies.  Everyone failed him, including, of course, himself. I don't have kids, but I think it's a parent's responsibility (and it's a HUGE one) to prepare your child to be a functioning adult. Sean's mother basically kept him as an infant all his life, naked, feeding him until he couldn't go out on his own. We all know what a disservice it was, to say the least.

RIP, Sean.

[Swiss]

1 hour ago, Lunula said:

Trying to help a fellow human being is not “a waste.” Sean suffered more from mental illness, and I believe some sort of developmental delay, than he did from “obesity.” The primary issue I have with this show is the singular focus on weight, rather than the holistic human being. That’s a different rant...but I am more than annoyed at anyone’s attitude that a human life - even one so seemingly hopeless as Sean - isn’t worth fighting for and deemed “a waste.” 

He wasn’t a serial killer. Or a rapist. Or a pedophile. Or a thief or drug dealer. He had a compulsion to overeat and had no idea that his life was worth something. This man was so disconnected from the rest of the world and I applaud Dr Now and the show for trying.

Lunula, your entire post actually has me tears.For some reason,  Sean's episode really hit me hard.  Sean was so alone even with so many people trying to help him.  

Edited June 13, 2019 by Swiss

[Kid]

1 hour ago, CousinOliver said:

Honestly, I think he wanted one of those adult baby/caretaker relationships, which are usually considered a sexual kink, but from my (VERY removed) understanding, are usually non sexual.

Which is EXACTLY what he had with his mother!!

[Kenzie]

5 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

It was like Sean was checked out and not really even processing what was said to him nor what he said.

My friend turned to me and said, "It's like he has FOR RENT signs in his eyes." Very sad.

[OoogleEyes]

2 hours ago, AZChristian said:

  

He wanted what he wanted when he wanted it.  He wanted to eat.  He didn't want to maintain a weight that would allow him to even fit into a shower.  He didn't want to pick up after himself 

He didn't even want to put on pants!

[libgirl2]

2 minutes ago, OoogleEyes said:

He didn't even want to put on pants!

Even though I watched just a bit, I did think to myself, at least put on a big tee shirt. I can't imagine just being naked all the time. 

[AZChristian]

As someone who is 50 pounds over ideal, I don't even like looking myself in a full-length mirror when I'm in the bathroom to take a shower.  I truly cannot imagine being naked all the time.

Also . . . I did suffer from clinical depression for 8 years.  I was on Paxil, which caused me to gain weight (I weighed 295, and am just under 5 feet tall).  During those years, I worked with a therapist and did everything I could to get past a horrendously abusive childhood and its resulting low self esteem.  (I'm well over 100 pounds below that now.)

As much help as was available to Sean (physical therapists, dietitians, psychologist, and Dr. Now), HE never seemed to be willing to do any of the work on his own.  One of his final ideas in trying to manipulate Dr. Now into believing he was serious was to have his neighbors pick out and buy his food for him.  Sean wouldn't even work on that on his own.  It was always someone else's responsibility to make his life better.  

I'm sorry for what happened to him, but at some point, each of us has to accept responsibility for our own actions, and I believe he was capable, but chose to not do that.

[the-grey-lady]

That was one of the saddest things I've ever seen. I spent most of this episode wondering when, exactly, Dr. Now realized that Sean was simply too far gone.

[Twopper]

1 hour ago, the-grey-lady said:

That was one of the saddest things I've ever seen. I spent most of this episode wondering when, exactly, Dr. Now realized that Sean was simply too far gone.

I am not sure.  Episode after episode we hear him tell patients that an infection can kill them or that they will die soon, and then we have patients like James K and Penny who go on for years after they fail his treatment plan. 

In reflecting on this sad case, I wonder how far back in time we would have to go in his life to have a meaningful intervening event that would have changed his life.   I am reminded of those books I read that had multiple alternate endings.  

I am not sure how much I believe the story about the leg injury being the start of this.  For one thing, a normal teenage boy would not end up morbidly obese after an injury.   It isn't like he was paralyzed.  It might well be painful to walk , but normal parents would seek treatment for him and if it couldn't be fully healed, a normal teen would develop coping skills that didn't involve over eating.  I had a friend that had a terrible injury at the same age, he ended up having to use a cane for the rest of his life, but he has managed a marriage and career.

I don't know exactly how intelligent he was or wasn't because I think any abilities were stiffled by a combination of isolation, deep depression, and an overabundance of lousy mothering.  He certainly showed no signs of academic achievement or interest, but I don't think he was all that dumb, either.  He was just a mess, and he needed more help than it was possible to give him.  We can look back and think of what might have helped, but I am not sure anything at this point was going to make a lasting difference.   It would have taken a lot of therapy to change his mom, but that would have helped.  Also he needed therapy to help him deal with his mom's death and, eventually, to understand how she contributed to his condition.   He seemed to gain most of his weight in his abdomen unlike Steven, and I think carrying so much excess weight there puts him at an even higher risk.

I am sorry.  I am rambling.  I just don't know what could have helped in the period of time that he saw Dr. Now.    Also I guess this show was already in the pipeline for this season as a WATN when he died so that they probably had to redo parts of it.  I am not sure I can watch the super duper sized version of this.  It is just so depressing.

Edited June 13, 2019 by Twopper

[ProTourist]

6 hours ago, libgirl2 said:

Those are very good questions. I wondered what he was like before the injury. Being on the football team meant being out among others. He might not have had a lot of friends, but he had to have a few. He also had to have learned some skills in school. How old was he when it happened? 17? Didn't the school get involved?

6 hours ago, Tabbygirl521 said:

I wish we knew more about his life before the injury. At least then, he escaped the house long enough to attend school. And he was on the football team. Did he ever have friends? Did he truly NEVER have social skills? He must have known how to shower, etc. in those days. Obviously Mom did a terrible number on him after the injury but what about before? And when he never returned after his injury did, for example, his old coach ever try to get in touch or help? I have so so so many questions.

Would just like to take a moment to correct the misconception that Sean's injury was caused by playing football in high school. Football was not mentioned in Sean's voice-over in the first episode, so there is no reason to believe he ever played, unless there is another source. Here are Sean's words:

Quote

By the time I was in high school I was over four hundred pounds. And my senior year in high school I had a really bad leg injury. I fell down some stairs, my ankle twisted, and I had two detached ligaments in my leg. And that injury made me bed bound, and prevented me from finishing my senior year.

[libgirl2]

2 minutes ago, ProTourist said:

Would just like to take a moment to correct the misconception that Sean's injury was caused by playing football in high school. Football was not mentioned in Sean's voice-over in the first episode, so there is no reason to believe he ever played, unless there is another source. Here are Sean's words:

Thanks for the clarification. I could have sworn he played football. Sounds like at 400lbs senior year he was already under the "care" of his mother. Probably didn't have many friends, thus when he became bed bound probably no one came around or if they did, they didn't stay long. 

I just can't understand as a mother how one can bring their child home and say okay, you are 17/18 years old, its time for you to just lay in bed and that is it. How can you not try to get the best care for your child? He didn't lose the leg! In addition to blaming his mother, his father should be shot for allowing that to happen. I would be in court in a heartbeat! 

[babyhouseman]

12 hours ago, mamadrama said:

Sean's mother should've been turned into APS. 

There was a show where a girlfriend/wife was intentionally overfeeding someone. I think her name was Lisa. Dr. Now would get on her about it, and she got an evil look. Dr. Now tried to call to get some help to stop her, but he couldn't. As long as the person is willing and not being force-fed, nothing can be done. 

I do wonder if he was ever on psychiatric medicine. They may not be helpful, or he could have refused to take it.

[jacksgirl]

 Sean's story was such a tragedy, but reading all of these comments restores my faith in people. The comments are full of compassion, understanding and sorrow. I know we all like to snark on those who deserve it, but the sympathy concerning Sean and his sad life make me feel good.

[ams1001]

9 hours ago, parrotfeathers said:

Did it show where Dr. Now let the father know?  I saw the grandfather call but not the father call.

Maybe dad didn't give permission to record or air it. Someone else mentioned that they can't record a call without permission so the grandfather call was probably a reenactment. I suspect grandpa isn't exactly a master thespian. He already knew and most likely had some time to process the information. Given Sean's situation, his family has probably been prepared for this for a while now. Your average person probably isn't going to sound especially emotional in recreating such a phone call.

My mom informed me of her sister's death last year via a text the morning after she died. We had all been there the day before (she did not appear to be aware of our presence, but who knows?), and she passed in the middle of the night, after everyone had gone home, or gone to sleep. We were expecting it, and in some ways it was a relief, because she had been suffering for a long time. So I was sad, but I didn't break down crying or anything. If I had to later reenact the moment I found out for a TV show...you probably wouldn't think much of my reaction.

(We’ve had a couple of unexpected deaths in the family in the past couple years and my mom would never have texted me about those. The first one was my cousin, and my dad told me and my mom together in person; the other was his brother's ex-wife, and my parents called me and told me over the phone. Just so no one thinks my parents would normally convey such news via text.)

[pdlinda]

7 hours ago, Kid said:

Sean’s mother, through her active and affirmative enabling,  kept him confined to a bed, naked, where his every need was taken care of by somebody else. And no matter how much he was helped to be self-sufficient by other people, every time he went home he reverted back to his conditioning.

I got to thinking about the circumstances of Sean's mother and father's meeting and the circumstances of the pregnancy and Sean's arrival into the world.  Were the mother and father in a "relationship" or was the pregnancy the result of a one-night stand??  

I wonder if the "father" was ever involved in Sean's life during his formative years.  I wonder if Sean's mother ever had any type of evaluation regarding her parenting when Sean was in elementary school?

In any event, my thoughts are focused on the relief and gratitude I feel for Sean's leaving the world of so much deprivation and struggle and failure and dashed hopes and into the realm of heavenly peace and quiet.  I say this in profound deference to the immense efforts of Dr. Now and all the massive #'s of caregivers engaged in trying to save Sean from himself.  May he rest in peace.

[CatherineM]

I had a basketball injury as a teenager. Ripped all my ligaments out of my ankle. They reconstructed it by taking a tendon out of my leg. This was the 70’s, so I’m sure they still do something comparable but probably laparoscopically. I was in a cast for 2-3 months and on crutches for 3 more. I walked with a cane for awhile after until someone asked me if I was blind.

I had to go up a flight of stairs to math class. I learned how because I was a good student and the idea of giving up school was cooky talk. My parents would have killed me. I learned how to drive with my left foot so I could still go see friends and do things. I lost my movie theatre job. The idea of going to my bed then wouldn’t have occurred to me. 20 years later when I broke my back and couldn’t move for 7 weeks, I did everything I could to get up. 

[WhitneyWhit]

I've been a little haunted by Sean's story today, his journey (ugh) is one of the saddest, most disturbing things I've ever seen on television. As loathsome as I found him at times, I couldn't really bring myself to fully hate him.

Sean was a victim of abuse at the hands of his mother. I know he loved her, but to me, Renee was pure evil. I blame his death fully on her. I think back to his first episode when he said the reason he ended up bedbound was because of two torn ligaments. That isn't anyway shape or form an injury that should render someone bedound for life, his mother took that as her opportunity to ensure he never left her. But I think she was grooming him for that before. I don't believe his father was abusive, I think he tried to prevent Sean from turning into what he eventually did and Mother dearest just couldn't have that, I think that was the beginning of making sure Sean always believed that only she what was best for him.

There was nothing Dr. Now or Dr. Paradise could do for Sean. Sean needed intensive, long term, in patient psychological care. Sean should probably be thankful Renee died in a hospital, that woman was twisted enough to pull a murder/suicide if someone told her she was terminal. She didn't want Sean to live without her and in the end, she got her wish.

[Guest]

I examine my own life, and the white-hot shitshow I was thrust into at birth, and because I made it out OK, I also recognize that not every else in the same circumstance can. Sure, Sean didn't have have the same drive as me (and I honestly can't even say where that drive came from), and clearly, he didn't have any friends who could steer him down another path. I don't know. I'm lucky, I guess—things could have very easily turned out the wrong way for me. 

For me, Sean was the literal embodiment of a human tragedy. 

I hope he finds, in whatever the afterlife holds, everything he couldn't here. 

[Otter]

I haven't watched the episode yet. but his previous episodes the depression was oozing out of him.   Dr. Now sends people to Lola *rolleyes* but so many are depressed and there IS medication that helps. Only an MD can prescribe.  Dr Paradise probably has access to an MD, but not Lola, she's a nobody.  I don't understand why Dr. Npw even refers any patients to her.

Anyway, to see a horribly depressed woman overcome.  Outside of an evil mother she wasn't much different than Sean.   

Google "Olivia".  She makes my heart sing.

 

[Snarkastikate]

I am generally a "pull yourself up by your bootstraps" kinda gal, that getting a raw deal in the family department isn't an excuse for bad behavior.  But Sean's mom was a sick twisted monster who fed her precious baby till he weighed almost 1,000 lbs and therefore would never be able to leave her...ever.  When he got so fat that his life was threatened she got scared and tried to save him. But it was too late, and when she died he was a dead man walking.  I strongly suspect  she destroyed any possible relationship with his father too.  Really sick bitch.  Too bad that CPS want called while he was still young and maybe savable.  Dr Now devoted lots of time and set up many resources, and he was uncharacteristically extremely patient.  He really tried his best.  It wasn't gonna ever happen .

Edited June 14, 2019 by Snarkastikate
Tyoo

[alegtostandon]

5 hours ago, ProTourist said:

Would just like to take a moment to correct the misconception that Sean's injury was caused by playing football in high school. Football was not mentioned in Sean's voice-over in the first episode, so there is no reason to believe he ever played, unless there is another source. Here are Sean's words:

Thank you,  I remember Sean's episode & did not remember anything about him being physically active.   What I remember him saying was when his parents divorced, he blamed himself.  There was never any mention of any physical or sexual abuse.  We all know,  though,  there was plenty of emotional abuse. 

2 things that really made me sad,  when Dr Paradise told him to start getting dressed every day.   From what I saw,  that did not happen. Second,  when Dr Now asked Sean what he wanted from life.  Sean replied to find a lady & start a business. 

I believe it was the 2nd episode they did on Sean,  after mom died & he had a caretaker.  She had taken him to the grocery store in his wheelchair to help buy healthy food,  parked him at the end of the aisle to go look for something.  Turned out to be an endcap of candy!   Sean says "now,  this is just not fair!".

It's sad,  even back wherever they came from,  I don't remember Sean having friends.  One episode where he moved from the larger apartment he & mom had to the little one he was in,  a neighbor came over to help.  

May Sean finally find the peace and acceptance he deserved  

[sagittarius sue]

12 hours ago, Tabbygirl521 said:

I wish we knew more about his life before the injury. At least then, he escaped the house long enough to attend school. And he was on the football team.

I re-watched the first episode, and there wasn't any mention of him playing football.  His injury came from a fall down the stairs.  He was 400 lbs at this time. I remember where there was another guy who was bedridden due to a football injury.  I also wonder where the info his IQ was only 75 came from.  He could be quite articulate as well as using words such as myriad and enunciate.  There was mention of a friend who stated he could be quite witty.

He mentioned that when he was very young he had problems handling his emotions appropriately as well as biting someone.  He spent his youth putting on the lbs. along with his mother per the photos they showed.  His parents fought a lot and divorced when he was 10, and his father wasn't in his life much after that.  What a terrible time for that to happen!  Age 10-14 is an important time for a male to bond with his father or other male figure.  I wonder if his mother started their weird relationship very early in his life which may have led to the arguments and father leaving.  It was just sick that his mother preferred him bedridden under her control, rather than fighting for him to get the injury fixed and mobile again.  There's a lot to think about with poor Sean.

[newyawk]

Honestly, I FF'd through most of this episode. I couldn't tolerate Sean's voice. i also don't think I missed much by skipping ahead by large chunks.  I guess i'm getting bored with the formula of the show's structure, and the hopeless cases. I did see the original episode, so I knew most of Sean's background. He was so childlike, that I don't think he ever would have thrived on his own whether or not he had his weight under control. Another wasted surgery, another wasted life.  😐 

Edited June 14, 2019 by newyawk

[Tabbygirl521]

Thanks, @sagittarius sue  I had him confused with the other guy you mentioned. I actually haven’t watched this most recent ep because I just don’t know if I can. What a terribly sad story. 

[Delete]

Sean spoke several times about wanting to be placed in a group home. He knew well enough that he required  constant care, because he was simply unable to cope with basic life skills.  There is such an epidemic of addiction going on that it is crazy scary.  Sean’s addiction was food. As much as I respect Dr. Now, and his team, Sean needed much more help. It would seem that to follow a diet and exercise program would be simple enough, but it is virtually impossible if you’re dealing with a whole host of other issues.

I noticed Sean would often  disassociate when Dr. Now was speaking to him. I suffer  from it at times when life is so unbearable. It is pure survival mode.  You mentally switch off to protect yourself from mental anguish and pain. And for those of you who are of strong character: you are most fortunate. Be thankful that you never enter into a place that is rootless, and devoid of anything but darkness. 

I feel nothing but sadness  for Sean, and for his incredibly short life he had on earth. I hope his spirit is free now, and that he is finally at peace. 

Edited June 14, 2019 by Barbara Please

[Kid]

19 hours ago, Lunula said:

He wasn’t a serial killer. Or a rapist. Or a pedophile. Or a thief or drug dealer. He had a compulsion to overeat and had no idea that his life was worth

And he was not TOXIC which some of the people on this show are which is why I had a totally different reaction to him and had sympathy for him.

Helping the ones who are toxic, who try to destroy and manipulate everyone around them, is a waste of resources.  And you will notice, the ones who are toxic, are still surviving.

[winsomeone]

A shame Sean couldn't have been placed in a nursing home, or some sort of a group home. He just was not able to function on his own, and had no one to help him it seemed like. Thousands was spent on him for weight loss..why not spend a few more and get him the help he really needed. He just wasn't able to mentally handle being all alone I don't think?

[Pondlass1]

The episode reiterated for me the value of family and friends.  

No one checked up on him.  He sat naked and unwashed in that mess for hours on end with nothing to occupy his mind but food and knitting . He didn’t even seem to watch tv or get involved in social media on his phone,

People drive me up the wall sometimes but we’re social animals.  Loneliness can be deadly. He had no one who cared so why should he?

What a tragedy 

[AZChristian]

31 minutes ago, Pondlass1 said:

The episode reiterated for me the value of family and friends.  

No one checked up on him.  He sat naked and unwashed in that mess for hours on end with nothing to occupy his mind but food and knitting . He didn’t even seem to watch tv or get involved in social media on his phone,

People drive me up the wall sometimes but we’re social animals.  Loneliness can be deadly. He had no one who cared so why should he?

What a tragedy 

No argument from me that it's a tragedy.  But (to quote Dr. Phil), "Doesn't matter how thin a pancake is, it has two sides."

I have a brother who has no one.  At this point, he doesn't even have me, because - for my own mental and emotional well-being - I had to walk away (on the advice of HIS psychiatrist.  

It's often said that in order to HAVE a friend, you have to BE a friend.  Sean never did anything to help himself, much less to be involved in the lives of others.  His entire existence was eating, to the point where he ate himself past the ability to even wear clothes or fit into his bathroom.  It looked to me that even his family members got "burnt out" by his lack of willingness to do anything positive for himself.  We saw Dr. Now try (how many times?) to steer him in the direction of losing weight, exercising, dealing with his mental health issues.  Every time, Sean gave lip service to the idea, but then actually did nothing on his own to change.

Tragedy?  Yes.  But perhaps one where a lot of it was his own making.

[DanaMB]

30 minutes in and I'm not sure I can finish watching. So depressing. So tragic.

[auntjess]

On 6/12/2019 at 10:36 PM, crazycatlady58 said:

The phone call to his grandfather ( and where did his father disappear to again?) had to be planned in advance you cannot record someone without there permission much less put the on t.v. maybe that is why the grandfather did not sound upset, but you would think even hearing it a second time would have resulted in some emotions.

Didn't I see in one of the articles posted when he died, that he was somewhere his father had placed him?  I'll have to look for the link.

On 6/13/2019 at 12:17 AM, missnoa said:

I would bet that 10k came from some kind of life insurance.

I thought that at first, but life insurance is usually paid quickly, so I wondered if it was some type of renters' insurance claim from the hurricane loss.

[the-grey-lady]

On 6/13/2019 at 2:58 AM, ProTourist said:

Was there no city, county, or state agency that could have taken over to prevent Sean from destroying himself? Adult Protective Services perhaps? Anything at all, other than to let it happen?

I still think, as was discussed in the live chat, that Dr. Now should have had a psych evalulation done for Sean, which I think should have put Sean into a mental health facility. Suicide must be illegal in Texas, and when someone is on track to kill himself due to addiction, the law should be able to step in.

I think these are really sad questions, and honestly, I think the answer really is that there wasn't anything more that could've been done for Sean. Yes, Dr. Now might have been able to get Sean into a psychiatric hold, but those are 48 hours, and then he would've been back on his own. And if APS had intervened, what options would've been available to them? They aren't prison wardens; they can't hold somebody indefinitely, and I think it's unreasonable to expect the authorities to imprison someone forever in order to keep them on a diet. Absolutely every option available to Sean required that eventually he take responsibility for his own life, and he simply was not capable of doing that, ever.

[AVM]

The very sad fact is Sean's long term goal wasn't a independent life ,but it was to go live at  full term care facility ,its a miracle that Sean didn't die sooner from the over eating after all he did have the stomach reduction surgery .I believe Dr.Now saved him numerous times during these three years of treatment,,... I hope he found peace .. We all wish for the best for all Dr Now's patients  but we tend to forget only 5% treated are successful in losing the weight and keeping it off ....

Edited June 14, 2019 by AVM

[auntjess]

18 hours ago, Twopper said:

Episode after episode we hear him tell patients that an infection can kill them or that they will die soon, and then we have patients like James K and Penny who go on for years after they fail his treatment plan. 

Yes, and sorry, but with some, I feel "promises, promises."

18 hours ago, libgirl2 said:

18 hours ago, ProTourist said:

Would just like to take a moment to correct the misconception that Sean's injury was caused by playing football in high school. Football was not mentioned in Sean's voice-over in the first episode, so there is no reason to believe he ever played, unless there is another source. Here are Sean's words:

Thanks for the clarification. I could have sworn he played football. Sounds like at 400lbs senior year he was already under the "care" of his mother. Probably didn't have many friends, thus when he became bed bound probably no one came around or if they did, they didn't stay long. 

Someone did have a football injury, and I got this mixed up too.  

[DC Gal in VA]

On 6/12/2019 at 10:18 PM, Concerned said:

It’s hard to interpret gaining 200 and 300 pounds in two months as anything but suicide. Sean had nothing to live for and the only thing that brought him peace was stuffing his face until he died. His IQ was only about 75, but his life force was much weaker. All Dr Now’s hectoring went in one ear, past his dumb face, and out the other ear. His momma screwed him up royally.

Thanks for this Concerned. I am still digesting--pun intended--this episode and began to question my memory about his massive weight gain in such a short amount of time.

Surely he couldn't have gained 188 pounds in two months and then ANOTHER 278 pounds in two months. I thought that maybe I got that wrong and the 278 meant that he "only" added 90 pounds to the 178. I can't even picture what that amount of food inhalation would look like on a daily basis. That's way more than a two liter bottle of Coke and an extra large loaded pizza for dinner. That's from sun up to sundown Olympic class style eating. The amount of money he spent on food in four months ($9,000 I believe) is mind boggling. That's more than my grocery budget for two years and I don't imagine Sean actually being on his feet every day cooking humongous meals three times a day.

And to think I kick myself about gaining three to five pounds over two months during the end of the year holiday season.

Edited to add: ITA about suicide. Every time he spoke of missing his Munchausen "mudder" I cringed. I truly believe that he couldn't cope or conceive of life without her and just wanted to be with her again. So incredibly sad.

Edited June 14, 2019 by DC Gal in VA
Additional comments.

[DC Gal in VA]

19 hours ago, ProTourist said:

Would just like to take a moment to correct the misconception that Sean's injury was caused by playing football in high school. Football was not mentioned in Sean's voice-over in the first episode, so there is no reason to believe he ever played, unless there is another source. Here are Sean's words:

Thanks for that quote from Sean about his injury, but he absolutely was on his high school football team.

I recall from his first episode hearing him not only stating that but seeing an actual photo of him included in that show showing him in his uniform standing beside what I assumed was his coach and other players. I remember thinking at the time that he was big but maybe just linebacker/defensive end big. I also recall him saying that, although he felt that his dad was overly critical of him, he seemed proud of the fact that he played football.

At the time I posted that his injury must have been a Godsend to his mom who saw him slipping away from her clutches, having teammates, a life away from her, Hell maybe even a girlfriend at some point and that bitch could not have that. So, with the injury, instead of doing what any loving, responsible parent would do to get their child on his feet again, she let him lie down and give up on any semblance of a life without her, stuffed him with food and turned him into the giant man-baby we all saw.

[ProTourist]

12 minutes ago, DC Gal in VA said:

Thanks for that quote from Sean about his injury, but he absolutely was on his high school football team.

I recall from his first episode hearing him not only stating that but seeing an actual photo of him included in that show showing him in his uniform standing beside what I assumed was his coach and other players. I remember thinking at the time that he was big but maybe just linebacker/defensive end big. I also recall him saying that, although he felt that his dad was overly critical of him, he seemed proud of the fact that he played football.

At the time I posted that his injury must have been a Godsend to his mom who saw him slipping away from her clutches, having teammates, a life away from her, Hell maybe even a girlfriend at some point and that bitch could not have that. So, with the injury, instead of doing what any loving, responsible parent would do to get their child on his feet again, she let him lie down and give up on any semblance of a life without her, stuffed him with food and turned him into the giant man-baby we all saw.

Nope, not Sean Milliken. The only reference I can find to a poundticipant who played high school football is Chad Dean. You might be remembering Chad, who has been very successful in his weight loss.

[Elizzikra]

Quote

you cannot record someone without there permission

It varies from state to state - in some places you can.

Quote

Cobb Salad: $19.25

Cheeseburger deluxe: $12.50

Neither of those is a great choice. A cobb salad, which often has blue cheese, ham, turkey, a hard boiled egg and ranch dressing is about as bad as a cheeseburger in terms of calories and fat.

Quote

Totally agree. By the end of the show, I was getting frustrated with Dr. Now (and I LOVE Dr. Now!).  But Sean had made it abundantly clear - both in words and actions - that he COULD NOT do what was expected using the techniques already provided. He had significant mental issues and needed more than just lectures, scolding, and a few Dr. Paradise visits. 

There really was nothing else Dr. Now could do. I completely agree that Sean was horribly depressed and that he was using food to kill himself... but legally and medically that doesn't mean a threat of imminent harm. Sean could have voluntarily signed himself into a psychiatric facility but I don't think that he would have wanted that given that he hated having his food controlled at the hospital and was always eager to get home. Sean could point blank tell a physician that he was going to go home and eat himself to death and that would not be sufficient to have him committed against his will. I've seen alcoholics in an ER hear from a physician that they must stop drinking immediately or it will kill them. They will tell the doctor they are going to go home and start drinking again, knowing it will kill them, and that's not sufficient to have them committed. 

I don't necessarily think that any of this is right - but that is the way it is. 

[DC Gal in VA]

40 minutes ago, ProTourist said:

Nope, not Sean Milliken. The only reference I can find to a poundticipant who played high school football is Chad Dean. You might be remembering Chad, who has been very successful in his weight loss.

Gee, I think we'll have to agree to disagree on this one. Heh heh, my rapidly greying brain cells remember him as having not only playing high school football but his comments about his dad's approval for doing so, although there may not be a reference to that on the internet.