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S09.E04: Love and Loss


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35 minutes ago, Churchhoney said:

I expect they figured the only entertainment value it could possibly have was seeing them blunder through, don't you think?

I agree. I would probably never get my own reality show because I would refuse to allow them to make me look stupid. There’s a fine line between acting cute and acting dumb. Kendra was cute, Jessa was dumb, Jana was normal.

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9 hours ago, truebluesmoky said:

Did you notice how happy Jenni was in her scenes with Kendra? She’s always seemed a little sad and is in a bit of an odd position in the family. Hannie and Jackson were close until she outgrew him, and now she seems to be in preteen mode. Jordyn has Anna’s oldest daughter as a bestie, and Josie stayed a forever baby. Jenni is the most lost of the lost girls. But she was smiling and happy baking the cake and in her talking heads with Kendra, and Kendra was so good with her. She seems better with young girls than Jenni’s actual sisters. I loved Kendra throughout, actually... I also love how shiny and healthy her hair looks!

Jenni has what 4-5 yrs before she's in the same boat as Kendra? Understandably that's why she's sad..one minute she wants to be a child,  outside forces are preparing / prepping her for the future the next minute.

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(edited)

I wonder how much miscellaneous hair showed up in those cakes?  Kendra & Jana were the only older girls who had their hair tied back.  Doesn't their hair hang down & get in the way if it's not tied back? 

I was surprised too that Jessa doesn't  own a hand mixer. 

I couldn't believe Lauren (or was it Kendra?) didn't know why the eggs stuck in the carton. 

I really like Kendra.  She seems the most mature of the younger wives. (I know the bar's not high.)  Speaking of younger wives, why wasn't Joy included in the bake off? I'm sure they could have rounded up a younger girl to be her partner.

9 hours ago, Spencer Hastings said:

I can’t fault Jessa for not having baking skills. I’m 31 years old and wouldn’t even need a whole hand to count how many cakes I’ve made! We aren’t cake people in my family so there’s really no need. 

But you probably weren't raised to be a housewife & homemaker.  Baking a cake should be second nature to them.

Edited by Barb23
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5 minutes ago, Barb23 said:

I wonder how much miscellaneous hair showed up in those cakes?  Kendra & Jana were the only older girls who had their hair tied back.  Doesn't their hair hang down & get in the way if it's not tied back? 

I was surprised too that Jessa doesn't  own a hand mixer. 

I couldn't believe Lauren (or was it Kendra?) didn't know why the eggs stuck in the carton. 

I really like Kendra.  She seems the most mature of the younger wives. (I know the bar's not high.)  Speaking of younger wives, why wasn't Joy included in the bake off? I'm sure they could have rounded up a younger girl to be her partner.

But you probably weren't raised to be a housewife & homemaker.  Baking a cake should be second nature to them.

I was thinking the same thing. I get it your hair is your crowning glory.... but tie it back when you cook! 

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4 minutes ago, winsomeone said:

What is really scary to think about, is the fact that Jessa will home school her kids. Is she as dumb as she seems, or just thinking she was being cute somehow for the cameras?

I just don't know. I don't think she is stupid but she hasn't shown herself to be terribly smart either. I do think she is camera savvy, so maybe she plays it up for the show? 

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I do not bore easily, but, this episode not only bored me to death, but, also insulted my intelligence and annoyed me to death.  So, this was the first time that I did change the channel, came back, changed it again and never returned.  The cake preparations were just painful.  I have zero desire to see that ever again. 

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(edited)

TLC really loves using a story line featuring the girls being unable to cook or bake... how many times are we going to see this. I'm also not buying Jessa not having a mixer or ever baking a cake. She likes cheesecake and has posted pictures of herself making those in the past.... I could have sworn I've spotted the standard issue Kitchen-Aid mixer on her counter top in a previous episode. Those are  typically also  a pretty popular wedding gift. 

Joe and Kendra have a pretty nice house set up compared to the rest. Who paid for Joe's house? I can't remember where he's working.( I know that cabin used to belong to Grandma Duggar.) Their kitchen and house is noticeably nicer than the rest. I always find the variations of wealth/ luxuries between the married Duggar kids interesting. There's no way some aren't jealous of the others. 

Also, was that Johanna baking with Jessa? She has had a major growth spurt! I barely recognized her. Why are they featuring her all the sudden. Putting her out there for courtship prospects when she turns of age? (Barf.) 

I think Lauren is my least favorite. She's very awkward, bland, strange in front of the camera. She's a pretty girl but she seems so backward? Or maybe just trying to act so much older than her age? I did enjoy Kendra this episode. 

Edited by LongDenimFrumper
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1 minute ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I do not bore easily, but, this episode not only bored me to death, but, also insulted my intelligence and annoyed me to death.  So, this was the first time that I did change the channel, came back, changed it again and never returned.  The cake preparations were just painful.  I have zero desire to see that ever again. 

It was painfully boring. Like you, I was switching channels and gave up with a little less than 1/2 hour left.  

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To me, there needs to be something interjected into the lives of the cast other than courting, marrying, honey mooning and birthing babies.  Is anything else ever going to happen?  Higher education?  New career path? A Duggar child exerting their independence on their own and without the aid of a spouse?  

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3 minutes ago, SunnyBeBe said:

To me, there needs to be something interjected into the lives of the cast other than courting, marrying, honey mooning and birthing babies.  Is anything else ever going to happen?  Higher education?  New career path? A Duggar child exerting their independence on their own and without the aid of a spouse?  

Now that would make for must see viewing! Imagine someone actually gets a real job?? Or maybe we see Abbie at work? Or someone travels outside the US and it isn't a honeymoon? 

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9 minutes ago, libgirl2 said:

Now that would make for must see viewing! Imagine someone actually gets a real job?? Or maybe we see Abbie at work? Or someone travels outside the US and it isn't a honeymoon? 

Yeah, or one of the adult Duggar kids become an airline attendant and goes to work where they travel the world without family involvement.  Especially, if it's a MALE Duggar!  Could John David explore commercial pilots license and really leave the nest?

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49 minutes ago, LongDenimFrumper said:

Also, was that Johanna baking with Jessa? She has had a major growth spurt! I barely recognized her. Why are they featuring her all the sudden. Putting her out there for courtship prospects when she turns of age? (Barf.) 

So far, Johanna is developing a bit of a different-looking face than the other older girls, who all resemble each other a lot. (Maybe Jinger is an exception there.) I'm curious to see how Johanna is going to look over the next few years.

Does Johanna have braces? If so, that may be why she looks a little different. I remember when Jill had braces she had a different look. 

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(edited)
1 hour ago, libgirl2 said:

I just don't know. I don't think she is stupid but she hasn't shown herself to be terribly smart either. I do think she is camera savvy, so maybe she plays it up for the show? 

Well, even if she was playing it up for the show, she'd be showing she's not too smart, though, wouldn't she? 

I mean, she's one of the ones who've always gone out of their way to tout the superiority of their way of living. And even though they don't believe in much education, I don't think they consider stupidity to be a badge of honor. In fact, they frequently proclaim that their life program makes them smarter and more competent than other people. 

So if you're showcasing your superior life on TeeVee, why would you want to play up incompetence and bumbling? 

You wouldn't, certainly. You'd want to show off how the super-competent Duggars, who've lived and educated right unlike all us non-modest dressers out here, can tackle any project with aplomb. They've claimed that a million times. .... 

So either Jessa (along with the others) really is a big dumb bumbler. Or she's at least dumb enough not to realize that a Keystone Kops act makes Duggars seem like big dumb bumblers (even though they're the most competent of people, thanks to their life style.).

I vote for the "she's a big dumb bumbler." And not out of any native stupidity, actually, but just because they're so busy lazing around, thinking about how superior they are, and looking down on anybody and everybody else -- from whom they might learn something -- that they're steeped in ignorance and have never learned how to think. 

Edited by Churchhoney
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3 hours ago, winsomeone said:

Jackson is 15, or will soon be. Tyler is 10-11, and they are the same size. Plus Jackson is so terribly thin and pale looking. In no way does he act like a 15 year old boy in any aspect. What is going on with him..nothing good medically I fear? Why has he always been kept with his much younger sisters instead of the group of his slightly older brothers? What aren't we being told about this child I wonder?

Jackson is the poster child for the fact that the Duggars had TOO MANY KIDS. He has been totally lost in the crowd, and any issues he has that need to be addressed have been ignored. It doesn't help that he was the last of a string of 6 boys, so when Johannah came along she was a novelty and poor little Jackson was forgotten.

I still remember when he got lost in an airport.  No one noticed, and when they found the poor little guy no one comforted him.

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(edited)
9 minutes ago, 3 is enough said:

Jackson is the poster child for the fact that the Duggars had TOO MANY KIDS. He has been totally lost in the crowd, and any issues he has that need to be addressed have been ignored. It doesn't help that he was the last of a string of 6 boys, so when Johannah came along she was a novelty and poor little Jackson was forgotten.

I still remember when he got lost in an airport.  No one noticed, and when they found the poor little guy no one comforted him.

That's one of the few segments of the show I've seen. Awful.

Jana did comfort him, though. It was so horrible it all stuck in my mind. I'll never forget Jim Bob strolling slowly down the airport corridor when they were alerted to his whereabouts. No hurry whatsoever. 

And I remember at the end of the part I watched Jana was holding him on her lap. .... His parents were nowhere to be seen at that point, of course. 

Edited by Churchhoney
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Funny, I remember Jana baking a banana cake for her grandfather and she looked like she knew what she was doing.  It was a long time ago so she was probably 15-16 at the time.  

I totally think they are playing up the "we are stupid in the kitchen" narrative for the show.  Granted, baking sugar and gluten free is more challenging, but still...

Kendra continues to impress.  She is sweet and kind and ...CLEAN.  She must cringe every time she has to visit the TTH.

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Wow, I am a rainbow baby!! Who knew?  well, certainly not me until I read the post in  this thread.  

I actually didn't mind this episode except for the overly long explanation and comment about the miscarriage.  I haven't seen enough of Lauren to form much of an opinion.   I felt sad for her last night when she talked about losing the baby.  I just think it must be really difficult to marry into and try to fit into a family where producing babies is the measure of success for the females.  

I figured the cake baking was producer driven.   I  think Abbie mentioned 1000 guests so in that case I hope they have a professional baker or bakery make the cake(s).  Maybe it was because our daughter married 3 years ago, and I was really involved with it that I found the cake discussion more interesting than most of you.  Also my DIL has spent probably the last 5 years developing gluten free alternatives in her cooking and baking.  And I am guilty of having expired baking powder since I am not much of a baker except for banana bread and brownies and the occasional gingerbread.   For my daughter's wedding, they chose a chocolate peanut butter groom's cake which was in a separate room from the bride's cake.   I  am deathly allergic to peanut butter, but it was a very popular cake with those who could eat it.   I was recently at a smaller outdoor wedding where the groom's sister made a variety of cakes.

One of the kids said that they just usually had ice cream for birthdays instead of cake.  I am used to both for birthdays, but I guess not everyone eats cake.   I laughed that Jessa had no idea about a scale in the kitchen;  I doubt she has one, but I would bet a box of stevia that she has a hand mixer.   I thought splenda might be a better choice than stevia; I don't recall that it has an aftertaste, but I don't usually use sugar alternates.  Also, Jessa, there are conversion charts online.  

I did like most of the episode as it has been a while since I have seen much of the younger ones.  

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1 minute ago, Churchhoney said:

That's one of the few segments of the show I watched. Awful.

Jana did comfort him, though. I remember at the end of the part I watched she was holding him on her lap. .... His parents were nowhere to be seen at that point, of course. 

Glad someone cared about the poor kid.  I just remember JB and Michelle strolling along, hand in hand, totally unconcerned.

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5 minutes ago, 3 is enough said:

Funny, I remember Jana baking a banana cake for her grandfather and she looked like she knew what she was doing.  It was a long time ago so she was probably 15-16 at the time.  

I totally think they are playing up the "we are stupid in the kitchen" narrative for the show.  Granted, baking sugar and gluten free is more challenging, but still...

Kendra continues to impress.  She is sweet and kind and ...CLEAN.  She must cringe every time she has to visit the TTH.

That's true she did. And even though this was a challenge, you would think someone would get a recipe. Let the little ones decorate but make sure the adult is in charge of the cake making. 

Kendra's kitchen was spotless. She strikes me as the type who has a cute and clean house. She's not laying around all day doing nothing. 

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7 minutes ago, 3 is enough said:

Glad someone cared about the poor kid.  I just remember JB and Michelle strolling along, hand in hand, totally unconcerned.

Yeah, me, too.

Sickening....On their way to make another kid, I guess.....

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(edited)

I didn't switch back to the show after a certain point. Did they ever address why Jinger can't express milk for when she goes out or Jeremy wants to feed Felicity?  Or how a rocking bassinet might help with her sleeping? 

Edited by SunnyBeBe
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Lauren married Josiah because she wanted to be a TV star. If this was the Bachelor, the other girls would be saying she’s “not here for the right reasons.” 😂

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20 hours ago, Sew Sumi said:

Not if Mrs. Swanson was there, unless the Swansons also know the Bateses through IBLP. No Duggar posted from Josie's wedding, but I guess Lauren could have had a relationship with Josie; they are about the same age. I

the episode itself was 99% cake contest (it had to be both gluten and sugar free), 1% Lauren sharing about the miscarriage. And in that front, TLC has already shown all that footage, so there was nothing new to see there, except Lauren's declaration that her baby was with Jesus and she would be able to hold it one day.

An hour of making a freaking cake.  An hour of my life I am not getting back.  I did learn that out of all of those I would probably eat something made by Kendra.  Maybe.  The others, including Jana, no.  As said eleventy billion times, they really have no housewife skills.  I mean if that is your goal and job, why are ya half assing it? Giving them a half in half assing it is generous.

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13 hours ago, sATL said:

I wish TLC (which I think the network at least one cooking show) would teach this crew some basic food prep before airing something like this. Erin Bates wasn't available for a facetime call? Now that's a woman whose come a long way with her cooking skills.

An egg stuck to the carton, then it breaks, and it is poured into the batter, straight from the carton.  Yuck !   647106603_SMHemoji.jpg.e8fc9d0b2018e3199a8c614eb3a71e0c.jpg

what they were down to their last egg out of 18 ?

That was gross and she could have made them all sick cause those broken eggs could have been chock full of bacteria.  What got me?  The state of the inside of her fridge.  Looked really gross and I would never eat out of their house.

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I would say that out of all the four teams, Team Jessa came off the most clueless about cooking, particularly Jessa more than Johannah. Since when is anything baked for 175 degrees? I will say that the cake looked the best in terms of neatness, even though it was simple; the frosting looked clean and smooth, even though it was probably not enough. 

Team Jana appeared like she knew what she was doing in terms of baking and she has definitely baked before. I just think she has limited experience with gluten- and sugar-free products. Nice attempt at making a fondant airplane. But, on Cake Boss, Buddy and his family pronounced it "fon-dawnt" rather than "fon-dent." Just saying...

Team Lauren also came off surprisingly clueless as well, although I'd argue that Lauren had more of a handicap than Jessa (i.e., Josie vs. Johannah, Lauren being nauseous). Interesting idea to use cupcakes as a cake. Although the airplane shape was interesting, I didn't like the decorations on top.

I liked Team Kendra. She seemed like she knew what she was doing, yet wasn't too smug about it. I liked that she and Jenni tried a piece of the final product to see how it tasted before assembling the cake; I don't think any other team did that. I would say that the weakness of her cake was that the decorations were overly simplistic, even more than Jessa's. Like I think she stuck a paper airplane on top. 

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(edited)

I'm really funny about food prep, cooking, handling food, etc.  so, I can't even go there with them.  There are a couple that I might trust with hygiene, but, not most of them. You would be surprised at the number of people who don't understand the concept of contamination.  

Edited by SunnyBeBe
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3 hours ago, Barb23 said:

I wonder how much miscellaneous hair showed up in those cakes?  Kendra & Jana were the only older girls who had their hair tied back.  Doesn't their hair hang down & get in the way if it's not tied back? 

I remember when GinJer were engaged and his grandma was teaching her how to cook something.  First thing Grandma did was pull Ginger's hair back.  

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1 minute ago, Evagirl said:

I remember when GinJer were engaged and his grandma was teaching her how to cook something.  First thing Grandma did was pull Ginger's hair back.  

Smart Grandma! 

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What I remember most about Jackson, was him crying when he had to stay at home when he was around two. His buddy had to have a talk with him about his behavior, and that buddy was good old Josh.

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22 minutes ago, winsomeone said:

What I remember most about Jackson, was him crying when he had to stay at home when he was around two. His buddy had to have a talk with him about his behavior, and that buddy was good old Josh.

That was James,and when Smuggar couldn't calm him down, Michelle whispered something into the poor toddler's ear that shut him up tout suite.

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4 minutes ago, Sew Sumi said:

That was James,and when Smuggar couldn't calm him down, Michelle whispered something into the poor toddler's ear that shut him up tout suite.

"We could kill you and no one would notice."

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(edited)

I have a basic gluten question..does it cause other issues besides intestinal? Like cholesterol,  blood pressure,  asmatic, weight  gain, diabetes , hair/skin issues? I guess i.m asking why is it better NOT  to eat gluten?

Edited by sATL
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(edited)
24 minutes ago, Sew Sumi said:

Sounds about right. 

"You're the 3rd James. Guess what happened to the other two?" 

(Delivered in a baby whisper)

Edited by JoanArc
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12 minutes ago, sATL said:

I have a basic gluten question..does it cause other issues besides intestinal? Like cholesterol,  blood pressure,  asmatic, weight  gain, diabetes , hair/skin issues? I guess i.m asking why is it better NOT  to eat gluten?

If you’re having health problems, it’s probably best to talk a doctor about diet stuff. The whole gluten thing is pretty controversial because while there are certainly people with serious illnesses (like Crohns disease or celiac disease) that benefit from avoiding gluten, “gluten-free” also became an internet fad.

FWIW, it’s not like gluten is a nutritional requirement. If someone wants to try eliminating it and see if they benefit from it, why not? There are vitamins and fiber in whole wheat foods, but there are plenty of other sources for those.

Back to topic...I thought these people don’t really believe in doctors. Have any of them actually been diagnosed with a condition requiring no gluten, or is this more made-for-teevee drama?

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(edited)
21 minutes ago, sATL said:

I have a basic gluten question..does it cause other issues besides intestinal? Like cholesterol,  blood pressure,  asmatic, weight  gain, diabetes , hair/skin issues? I guess i.m asking why is it better NOT  to eat gluten?

https://www.healthline.com/nutrition/signs-you-are-gluten-intolerant#section7

Weight loss, Iron deficiency anemia, Skin problems etc things I didn't know about gluten intolerance. 

Honestly though reading this article is making me think I'm gluten intolerant 😕

Edited by Puffin
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I just caught up on all my shows and I can't believe I wasted an hour of my life watching these idiots bake cakes. I'm also disgusted by the hundreds of dollars worth of ingredients that got tossed in the trash due to all the screw-ups. 

With her chubby cheeks and blonde hair, Jenni looks like she could pass for Kendra's sister. Hannie didn't look too thrilled to be paired with Jessa.

I really didn't need to hear about poop and diaper blow-outs, but I loved all the little baby footprints along the walls of the birth center. 

Tyler is going to be a really good-looking guy when he's fully grown. Poor Jackson is so stunted. He's 15 and still stuck with the Littles? 

How far along was Lauren when she miscarried? She's just so extra about everything. The breathy voice, sharp inhales, dramatic pauses; her entire demeanor is so contrived and affected. I think Si and Lauren's marriage is a complete joke and losing the baby was a set-back in Lauren's mission to make Si appear heteronormative. 

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(edited)
2 minutes ago, BitterApple said:

How far along was Lauren when she miscarried? She's just so extra about everything. The breathy voice, sharp inhales, dramatic pauses; her entire demeanor is so contrived and affected. I think Si and Lauren's marriage is a complete joke and losing the baby was a set-back in Lauren's mission to make Si appear heteronormative

THAT is my new favorite word. I am going to use it properly in a sentence every day.

Edited by Westiepeach
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2 minutes ago, BitterApple said:

I just caught up on all my shows and I can't believe I wasted an hour of my life watching these idiots bake cakes. I'm also disgusted by the hundreds of dollars worth of ingredients that got tossed in the trash due to all the screw-ups. 

With her chubby cheeks and blonde hair, Jenni looks like she could pass for Kendra's sister. Hannie didn't look too thrilled to be paired with Jessa.

I really didn't need to hear about poop and diaper blow-outs, but I loved all the little baby footprints along the walls of the birth center. 

Tyler is going to be a really good-looking guy when he's fully grown. Poor Jackson is so stunted. He's 15 and still stuck with the Littles? 

How far along was Lauren when she miscarried? She's just so extra about everything. The breathy voice, sharp inhales, dramatic pauses; her entire demeanor is so contrived and affected. I think Si and Lauren's marriage is a complete joke and losing the baby was a set-back in Lauren's mission to make Si appear heteronormative. 

He is small. I thought Tyler looked to be as tall as him and broader. Then again, he might hit a growth spurt soon and shoot up. Happens all the time. Tyler looks happy. Poor kid, it has to be a comfort to be in a family and included even this family. 

Diaper blowouts ---- yuck. It did make me very happy that my son NEVER had one when he was in diapers! I really lucked out on that one. 

Lauren's breathy voice is annoying. I don't know how Josiah can listen to it all day. The little I saw drove me crazy. 

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(edited)
44 minutes ago, sATL said:

I have a basic gluten question..does it cause other issues besides intestinal? Like cholesterol,  blood pressure,  asmatic, weight  gain, diabetes , hair/skin issues? I guess i.m asking why is it better NOT  to eat gluten?

It's not necessarily better. If it doesn't trigger an immune reaction of some sort in your digestive system, there seems to be no evidence at this point that it has any actual effect on your body at all.  If you get symptoms when you eat gluten -- ditch the gluten. Otherwise, there seems to be no reason to. 

24 minutes ago, Oldernowiser said:

If you’re having health problems, it’s probably best to talk a doctor about diet stuff. The whole gluten thing is pretty controversial because while there are certainly people with serious illnesses (like Crohns disease or celiac disease) that benefit from avoiding gluten, “gluten-free” also became an internet fad.

FWIW, it’s not like gluten is a nutritional requirement. If someone wants to try eliminating it and see if they benefit from it, why not? There are vitamins and fiber in whole wheat foods, but there are plenty of other sources for those.

Back to topic...I thought these people don’t really believe in doctors. Have any of them actually been diagnosed with a condition requiring no gluten, or is this more made-for-teevee drama?

They don't seem to believe much in doctors, but they do seem to be wholeheartedly in love with trends (although they don't admit this). And gluten-free is a certainly a trend. 

Edited by Churchhoney
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(edited)

I wonder if Jessa recognizes that she is being edited to look like the incurious dullard she actually is.

I wonder if Jackson has a growth hormone deficiency.

I wonder why these young parents allow a "storyline" to be built around their babies' poop, thus utterly violating the kids' privacy (I know, I know, people who track their mother's ovulation don't believe in privacy).

I wonder how anyone can stand to be around Lauren, with her passive-aggressiveness and her drama.

I wonder why I continue to follow this clusterduck of a family.

Edited by jcbrown
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(edited)
5 hours ago, Churchhoney said:

Jana did comfort him, though. It was so horrible it all stuck in my mind. I'll never forget Jim Bob strolling slowly down the airport corridor when they were alerted to his whereabouts. No hurry whatsoever. 

And I remember at the end of the part I watched Jana was holding him on her lap. .... His parents were nowhere to be seen at that point, of course. 

Well, of course it would be Jana, since she was his real moth . . . I mean, his buddy. He naturally gravitated toward her for comfort rather than Michelle, who is pretty much useless.

BTW, I thought it was interesting that Jana's cake-making tactic was to get her teammates out of her way by assigning them busy work so that she could do the actual baking herself. I felt kinda sorry for the boys (Jackson in particular, who seemed like he wanted to participate; I don't think Tyler cared much). That seemed rather ruthlessly competitive of her and not really in the spirit of teamwork (although I do realize it was a competition!).

Edited by graefin
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hey... is this the most we've seen the littles have a speaking part?  I guess JB is starting to realize to keep the $$ rolling in, he has to call in the the 3rd set of kids to the cameras...

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