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S03.E12: Songbird Road, Part Two


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Am I alone in not thinking that Kevin actually drank that whiskey? I think he fantasized about drinking it, and we were shown that fantasy. But not only was the bottle still half full afterwards but he wouldn't have been able to face his mother for the ride home if he had drunk a half bottle of whiskey. He would have been noticeably drunk. I think that the reason he was so pensive on the ride home is that he wanted to drink that whiskey, and that upset him. 

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46 minutes ago, Cowgirl said:

I appreciated the look of slight annoyance on young Kevin's face when his mom announced she was taking him to get his card signed, and not his dad.  It seems like he decided when he was pretty young that Dad was it for him and Mom was an annoyance. 

I took it as little Kevin was always getting shoved aside as the "third-wheel" kid while Randall was the special one with Mom and Kate was the (somewhat creepy) special one with Dad. So FINALLY Kevin gets a day about baseball with DAD! and then gets shoved off to Mom, who knows nothing about the importance of that baseball card. (As proven by she can't live one-half hour without eating lunch for pete's sake.) In fact, Rebecca didn't even need to be there since, basically, she wasn't. She was chowing down at the food court leaving Kevin all alone. All alone like he still is in that family. JMHO of course.

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I’m hoping this is the end of the Nicky arc for some time. Absolutely bored with it. I’m looking forward to the Beth and mom arc.  I see Zoe will be seen in flashbacks, so that should be interesting.  I want to know more about the Beth and Zoe dynamics. 

This show used to be must see TV for me, but I find there are just too many plots covered.  Much rather see the focus on the core family and their partners/spouses. 

The girl playing young Kate towers over the boys. Since adult Kate is much shorter than her brothers, as is teen Kate, they may need to address this next season. Young Randall is going through puberty with his deepening voice, so he probably won’t grow much now. He may need to wear lifts. This bothers me as much as the inconsistencies in the winter scenes. Plus, I think young Kate is a weak actor compared to the boys and all of the teen actors.

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2 minutes ago, Jodithgrace said:

Am I alone in not thinking that Kevin actually drank that whiskey?

I think that's a good point. Because I can't imagine that if he started drinking he would have stopped and left some in the bottle. Sort of like can you eat just one potato chip or one M+M if no one is there and you are crazy starving for junk food/chocolate?

I like the idea that he imagined drinking it, which accounts for no whiskey smell on him or drunken behavior/speech. I hope you are right!

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4 minutes ago, saber5055 said:

I took it as little Kevin was always getting shoved aside as the "third-wheel" kid while Randall was the special one with Mom and Kate was the (somewhat creepy) special one with Dad. So FINALLY Kevin gets a day about baseball with DAD! and then gets shoved off to Mom, who knows nothing about the importance of that baseball card. (As proven by she can't live one-half hour without eating lunch for pete's sake.) In fact, Rebecca didn't even need to be there since, basically, she wasn't. She was chowing down at the food court leaving Kevin all alone. All alone like he still is in that family. JMHO of course.

Thank you for adding this perspective, saber5055.  When I watched it, I was confused by kevin's reaction to that and couldn't make any sense of it at the time.  I think you nailed it.

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8 hours ago, BonnieD said:

Eleven year olds and they've never ordered a pizza before? Okay. That tells me all I need to know about the over-parenting going on there.

I don't necessarily think it's odd that they haven't ordered pizza because that takes money. Plus, with Jack stressing to get toppings that everybody will like, seems like there were major disagreements about that in the past. But, what I might find odd is if that was lunch.  I wouldn't have gone outside to bug my dad about being hungry at lunch time, I would have made a sandwich. Now dinner which is usually a family affair would be different, because if I was supposed to be eating family dinner in a half hour, or whatever, my parents might get mad that I "ruined my appetite."  But, it was still very light out, so I'm thinking lunch.

Also, Jack clearly didn't want the kids bugging him.  They are 11 years old.  Tell them you have to run some errands and then go drive off somewhere where you can be alone.  It was the early '90s. It was not yet a crime to leave a couple of 11 year olds home alone for a couple of hours in the middle of the day.  Nobody would have given it a second thought.

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1 hour ago, Jodithgrace said:

Am I alone in not thinking that Kevin actually drank that whiskey? I think he fantasized about drinking it, and we were shown that fantasy. But not only was the bottle still half full afterwards but he wouldn't have been able to face his mother for the ride home if he had drunk a half bottle of whiskey. He would have been noticeably drunk. I think that the reason he was so pensive on the ride home is that he wanted to drink that whiskey, and that upset him. 

Hartley had talked about it beforehand and after. I still think it's to somehow tie in with Nicky in some way later.

https://tvline.com/2019/02/12/this-is-us-season-3-episode-12-kevin-drinks-justin-hartley-interview/\\

An interview with Griffin, he said he doesn't know how much they will use him in the future but I hope he comes back. Kind of sad the way they left it.

Where would you like to see Nicky's character go next if he returns?

I would like to [return], I'd love to be a part of the fabric of the family. I have no idea what the future is though, but you know, I can tell you how Nicky would feel. After the family left, he was left feeling more alone than he did before they arrived and kind of longing to return but not knowing how to do that. But I think he's… there's so many conflicting emotions about what he wants and what he should or should not do about it. I think he is twice as lonely now.

Edited by debraran
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42 minutes ago, Sammich said:

The girl playing young Kate towers over the boys. Since adult Kate is much shorter than her brothers, as is teen Kate, they may need to address this next season. Young Randall is going through puberty with his deepening voice, so he probably won’t grow much now. He may need to wear lifts. This bothers me as much as the inconsistencies in the winter scenes. Plus, I think young Kate is a weak actor compared to the boys and all of the teen actors.

That actress is clearly having a growth spurt, but I don't think kid Randall is anywhere near the point of not growing much more now.  My son kept growing for years, and many inches, after the start of puberty.  The two characters aren't biologically related so any variance could be explained by that, but girls reach their full adult height before boys (usually) so even being taller than Kevin now makes sense, even if it looks incongruous. 

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19 hours ago, Armchair Critic said:

I like this show, I do. But not everyone finds the Pearson family stories fascinating, especially when they are strangers who are kind enough to let you in their house when they are busy.

I wanted to respond to the "strangers letting you in to their house" position which others have expressed the same opinion about. 

When you lived in a house for years as a child and you become an adult and reach a certain age, it is very common to want to "go back" and visit the house in which you grew up. Larry David and Barbra Streisand did it and their visits were segments on 60 Minutes. Every room of the house holds hundreds of memories. And because of that, the house  always "mentally" belongs to their family even though other families lived in the house years after they moved. They feel an "ownership" connected to that house.

It actually is an "unwritten rule" to allow people who once lived there to go in and let the memories flood back. It happens all the time and most families love having past residents visit and tell their stories. 

I think the reason the mother felt awkward with Kate was because Kate seemed like she was going to go into meltdown mode. it was not that the siblings were there, it was how they acted when they were there. 

3 minutes ago, DakotaLavender said:
Edited by DakotaLavender
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56 minutes ago, Sammich said:

The girl playing young Kate towers over the boys. Since adult Kate is much shorter than her brothers, as is teen Kate, they may need to address this next season. Young Randall is going through puberty with his deepening voice, so he probably won’t grow much now. He may need to wear lifts. This bothers me as much as the inconsistencies in the winter scenes. Plus, I think young Kate is a weak actor compared to the boys and all of the teen actors.

If this show goes past this season they need to let the youngest set of kids go.

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6 minutes ago, DakotaLavender said:

Larry David and Barbra Streisand did it and their visits were segments on 60 Minutes.

But, they are famous and obviously made arrangements ahead of time.  I just find it weird that you would walk up to a stranger and ask to see the house.  Or that people would let strangers in.  I wouldn't.

Edited by Katy M
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5 minutes ago, DakotaLavender said:

It actually is an "unwritten rule" to allow people who once lived there to go in and let the memories flood back. It happens all the time and most families love having past residents visit and tell their stories. 

Unwritten rules are common knowledge.  Considering the number of people questioning that this actually happens, I don't think it is.  And if it is actually an unwritten rule that everybody knows about, serial killers now know how to gain access to just about any house they want to.  At least ones that they know have sold within 10 years.

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11 minutes ago, DakotaLavender said:

When you lived in a house for years as a child and you become an adult and reach a certain age, it is very common to want to "go back" and visit the house in which you grew up.

Yes, that is true. But what if your house burned down and was no longer there, yet you still had to go into the house that was built on that site and had nothing whatsoever to do with you or your family?

Even Randall said that, the house was gone but the yard and neighborhood were still there, and that's why they were going, to "tour" the neighborhood. Then all of a sudden that house was "the Pearson house" and it never burned down? And they HAD to be let in?

I didn't get it. I wish the family had said, "But we build this house 10 years ago, no one else has ever lived here but us. So ... WTH? Get lost, creeps!"

Edited by saber5055
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2 minutes ago, Katy M said:

But, they are famous and obviously made arrangements ahead of time.  I just find it weird that you would walk up to a stranger and ask to see the house.  Or that people would let strangers in.  I wouldn't.

I have done it.... my friends have done it and many other people I know do it. It is very common on Long Island. So many of my high school class who have relocated went back to the old neighborhood, knocked on the door, asked to go into the houses in which they grew up, and were graciously allowed to look around and let the memories flood back. 

The family I visited actually bonded with me and asked me to send them on facebook photos of the neighborhood and house when I lived there. They had questions about the house too. It is a wonderful experience. 

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1 hour ago, DakotaLavender said:

I wanted to respond to the "strangers letting you in to their house" position which others have expressed the same opinion about. 

When you lived in a house for years as a child and you become an adult and reach a certain age, it is very common to want to "go back" and visit the house in which you grew up. Larry David and Barbra Streisand did it and their visits were segments on 60 Minutes. Every room of the house holds hundreds of memories. And because of that, the house  always "mentally" belongs to their family even though other families lived in the house years after they moved. 

It actually is an "unwritten rule" to allow people who once lived there to go in and let the memories flood back. It happens all the time and most families love having past residents visit and tell their stories. 

I'm putting my insurance agent on speed dial so I can follow the "unwritten rule". 

Edited by Brookside
Because I can't work out how the hell the forum works any more.
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11 minutes ago, Brookside said:

I'm putting my insurance agent on speed dial so I can follow the "unwritten rule". 

Well maybe only in my old neighborhood it is.... because it happens so often there we have a community facebook page that includes a "then and now" to string together families who lived in one house and we have conversations about the neighborhood and the stores that are gone and homes that have been bought and torn down and McMansions built on the land and we even discuss house renovations. 

I realize it is not for everybody and with home invasions on the rise it might not be a good idea to open doors so quickly... but in my hometown we have loved our discussions and looking at pictures of families through the decades that lived in the same house. 

I admired a street in my old neighborhood and a guy PMd me on facebook (from the group) and actually invited me to visit his house on that street. 

The "going back" is an acquired taste and some people don't get it and it's all good. So it may not be an "unwritten rule" but in my old neighborhood it is considered a wonderful experience. 

Edited by DakotaLavender
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48 minutes ago, debraran said:

Hartley had talked about it beforehand and after. I still think it's to somehow tie in with Nicky in some way later.

https://tvline.com/2019/02/12/this-is-us-season-3-episode-12-kevin-drinks-justin-hartley-interview/\\

An interview with Griffin, he said he doesn't know how much they will use him in the future but I hope he comes back. Kind of sad the way they left it.

Where would you like to see Nicky's character go next if he returns?

I would like to [return], I'd love to be a part of the fabric of the family. I have no idea what the future is though, but you know, I can tell you how Nicky would feel. After the family left, he was left feeling more alone than he did before they arrived and kind of longing to return but not knowing how to do that. But I think he's… there's so many conflicting emotions about what he wants and what he should or should not do about it. I think he is twice as lonely now.

I really like Nicky and the actor who plays him - also like the two younger Nickys, and the sad story of a talented, sensitive soul all but destroyed by the evils of the world. I hope he gets back to being that person he recalled, and we get to see it.

Edited by nexxie
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1 hour ago, nexxie said:

I really like Nicky and the actor who plays him - also like the two younger Nickys, and the sad story of a talented, sensitive soul all but destroyed by the evils of the world. I hope he gets back to being that person he recalled, and we get to see it. 

Same here. The Nicky story actually rings true, or at least true in the world I live in. I'd like to see more Nicky/Kevin and WAY less Kate. Change that to NO KATE. Or Toby. Randall can pop in every once in a while. You know, when he isn't busy saving the world.

As for touring your old house, sometimes memories are better kept as they are than destroyed by what's new. But I still say it should be YOUR childhood home you are visiting, not some rando house built years later on the burned-out lot.

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12 hours ago, Katy M said:

This happens all the time on TV, but does anybody in real life actually go to their old house and ask to go in. 

When I was about 16 my parents and I went to the house we lived in when I was born (we moved when I was 2), but we had remained friends with the people across the street so we were in the neighborhood several times a year (our visit was an impromptu thing while we were at our friends' for a party). I'm sure my parents had seen/spoken to the house's owners in passing over the years, at least, so they weren't exactly complete strangers. (It was kind of cool to see; my dad had done the bathroom and built the kitchen cabinets and they were still the same as when we lived there. But it has since been sold and they added onto the back and also a second floor. It looks completely different from the outside; I'm sure all my dad's stuff is gone, so I would have no reason to go see it now.)

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22 hours ago, CleoCaesar said:

So Randall can’t help Nicky because he has to get home. Why? “My wife is unemployed and all over the place.” What? How can anyone NOT want to just smack him in his stupid face? Beth is in no way the problem here, and not spiraling like someone driven insane by unemployment. He is such a sanctimonious ass with so little actual respect for his wife. I hope a divorce there happens at some point.

Kevin really shouldn’t have apologized to him for commenting that usually Randall is first to save everyone, with the exception of Nicky. It’s true.

It would have made a lot more sense if Randall had been able to say that Beth had called him to let him know that her mother was unwell and she was waiting for him to come home so she could go visit her.  He could have told Beth he'd come home after dropping Kate off for her flight, and still have decided to kill a few hours with Kate before said flight.

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21 hours ago, Amethyst said:

I understand Nicky feeling overwhelmed.  It's a lot to learn in the span of two days.  But I actually thought Nicky was still going to kill himself once Kevin left the trailer.  The stuff about him going to meetings didn't seem true, and it seemed like he just wanted Kevin to leave.

Do you think Kevin left the gun there?  I suppose he wouldn't want to be caught driving around with it.  Maybe bury it in the woods.

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17 hours ago, Spencer Hastings said:

Kate and Randall are annoying and inappropriate but I enjoyed seeing how time and circumstance can warp your perception of a loved one or a situation. They both remembered the sequin fight but somehow forgot what led up to it. Randall finally remembered when he was back in “the house” but Kate somehow managed to keep blocking it out. Sometimes our brains try to protect us and only let us remember the good.

Neither kid saw Jack throw the plate, but when they entered the kitchen, Randall, who as we know was pretty perceptive, saw the broken plate and the sauce on the wall and figured it out.  The subsequent sequin fight and Pearson Pizza comments wiped out Kate's memory of Jack having  been angry and yelling at them, but Randall had perceived more, and so didn't completely forget Jack's initial anger.

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3 hours ago, Brookside said:

As a mom, in my house I'm not the one cleaning up after a glitter fight.

It never ceases to amaze me how spoiled tv kids are. If I had made a big ass mess, my mom would have expected me to clean it up. Kate, Randall, and Kevin are 11, not 3. They are old enough to do things like laundry, washing dishes, taking out the garbage, vacuuming, etc. yet Jack and Rebecca are the only ones we see doing this stuff. Why don't these kids have chores?

2 hours ago, DakotaLavender said:

It actually is an "unwritten rule" to allow people who once lived there to go in and let the memories flood back. It happens all the time and most families love having past residents visit and tell their stories.

As far as I'm concerned, it's not an unwritten rule like holding the door open for the person behind you. It's strangers knocking on your door asking to come into your house. I don't want to sound paranoid, but how do you know what their real intentions are? And I say that as someone who lives in a very safe, quiet neighborhood.

It's nice to be nice, but you do not have to let someone into your house just because they claim they used to live there. I understand the impulse to see your childhood home, but no one is obligated to let randos into their home just because they knocked on the door. I'm all for kindness (and people are welcome to let people in if they feel comfortable), but I do not think that this qualifies as an unwritten rule or that people should feel they HAVE to let in any stranger who shows up on their doorstep just because they're supposed to be nice and police to anyone who claims they used to live there.

A few years ago, my sister went back to Chicago (we moved to California when we were in elementary school). She drove to our childhood home and took a picture of the outside, but she didn't knock on the door and ask anyone to let her in, despite the fact that she had traveled 2000 miles and hadn't seen our house since she was in third grade.

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Wow. This episode brought up some shit.

Your resident alcoholic here (22 months sober). My dad is Jack Pearson. VERY SIMILAR. Family man. Everyone loves him. Fantastic dad and husband. Drinking problem - very similar to Jack’s. I’ve seen people talk about Jack’s problem seeming unrealistic and I’m telling you that it was exactly how my dad was (he stopped drinking six years ago). I’m also going through some pretty intensive therapy talking about how I whitewashed my childhood as a coping mechanism, and it’s brought up some times when my parents - especially my dad (who I idolize like Kate does) - were not perfect like I remembered he was. It’s tough, and I bawled most of the episode. And the fact that Kevin picked up. I have a savior complex as well, and if I found out that my family had a big secret and that person wasn’t here to talk to anymore, I’d be broken. He’s shown so much growth. And he looks like my alcoholic boyfriend (who I always worry about drinking again).

im not sure the point of all this is, but this episode hit me hard.

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3 hours ago, saber5055 said:

She was chowing down at the food court leaving Kevin all alone. All alone like he still is in that family. JMHO of course.

I was worried when Rebecca left Kevin alone in the line, he would wander off or something bad would happen to him, or the baseball guy would be a jerk, and he would never tell Rebecca what happened. At least that flashback turned out alright. Although, really Rebecca? You couldn't wait an extra 30 minutes to get lunch for something that was clearly a big deal for little Kevin?

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(((((againstthewind)))))

I wish, instead of checking out, Randall and Kate had tried to really talk Kevin out of his Save Uncle Nicky crusade. Maybe if he'd just hung out at the hotel with him for the morning, let Nicky get to know him a bit. Did no one think of the pain Nicky felt of being cut off by his childhood hero? Did no one realize they also had some ish to process? I hope they can work Nicky back in in future episodes, just for seeing Griffin Dunne knock it out of the park again.

Edited by MsChicklet
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9 hours ago, ShadowFacts said:

It really made no sense to me, and also, Pittsburgh is the complete opposite direction than going back to New Jersey, hours away, for two people who had to get back to their homes.  Nothing about that worked for me, including the vignette with the people who lived there.  Non sequitur.

I guess it depends on what airport Randall was taking Kate to.

7 hours ago, AV8n said:

In his last scene with Kevin in the trailer, he reaches into the fridge for a bottle, shakes it, then put it back. Perhaps he realized it was less full than he remembered.

I don't think people keep whiskey in the fridge.

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22 hours ago, CleoCaesar said:

So Randall can’t help Nicky because he has to get home. Why? “My wife is unemployed and all over the place.” What? How can anyone NOT want to just smack him in his stupid face? Beth is in no way the problem here, and not spiraling like someone driven insane by unemployment. He is such a sanctimonious ass with so little actual respect for his wife. I hope a divorce there happens at some point.

Kevin really shouldn’t have apologized to him for commenting that usually Randall is first to save everyone, with the exception of Nicky. It’s true.

With the exception of hoping Beth and Randall divorce, I agree.  I was cheering Kevin on when he called Randall on his reasons for leaving.  But, wait, we have a couple hours to tour the old 'hood, knock on strangers' door and ask to be let in to see a house that really wasn't the same house, just on the same lot, so we could reminisce.  Thank God Kate didn't tell the family that their house burned down and their Saint Jack Father died because of it.  Hey, maybe Kate is making progress!

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12 minutes ago, ItCouldBeWorse said:

I guess it depends on what airport Randall was taking Kate to.

It was the airport where they left their warp-speed time-travel machine.

20 minutes ago, MsChicklet said:

just for seeing Dominick Dunne knock it out of the park again.

Not to nit pick but you mean Griffin Dunne. I am guessing, however, you were a fan of Power, Privilege, and Justice. As am I!

In my mind that bottle Nicky took out of the fridge and shook was a beer, then he remembered being told Kevin is an alcoholic so put it back out of respect to Kevin. BUT! Do people shake beer in a bottle before opening? I didn't think so but what do I know.

Edited by saber5055
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22 hours ago, Catgyrl said:

ME TOO!! I went back to my guide and pressed the right channel and it went right back to the show.

I thought it was a preview of another show, but then I realized I was watching on Hulu.  I kind of want to rewatch their segment again to find out what their family was about, but it will probably be another non-story, like whatever happened to the Crockpot Couple.  

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The Pearsons somehow managed to make imposing on others an olympic event. They barged in at Nicky's then they barged in at their old house. Half this show is Pearsons barging in on people.

I feel like Mandy Moore has really settled into the role of older Rebecca. Last season she seemed off but now I have to remember that Mandy is half Rebecca's age.

Did we get a recipe for Pearson pizza? It was one ingredient for each family member. If spinach was Randall's what were the others?

I loved hearing Nelson's "Love and Affection" playing in the background of young Kate and Randall's scenes. Let's just say it brought back...memories. Very happy memories.

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13 hours ago, icemiser69 said:

I don't  think Nicky is really leaving the door open.  He said what he needed to say in order for them to leave him alone.   I seriously doubt that he will attend a meeting either.

The Pearson family are more annoying than people who come to someone's house trying to sell stuff.

As for the sequin fight, people tend to remember what they want to remember.  I am not surprised that both Kate and Randall have different memories of that day.  Kate idolizes her father far too much to remember him for what he was. I am surprised that she doesn't have dreams of him walking on water.

I didn't expect Kevin to take a drink.  I expected  Kevin to fill the metal box with cash to help Nicky out.

I wasn't expecting Kevin to take a drink either!  I thought he was going to look inside the box and see old pictures of the Pearsons that Nicky had kept.

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13 hours ago, Jillybean said:

I've never forgotten about Kate sitting outside the house (and now you've reminded us 4 times, haha), and that's why I thought it was so weird Randall suggested going there. You don't take someone back to the scene of their unhealthy obsession.

But Randall wouldn't be thinking of Kate's welfare or unhealthy obsession; he was only thinking of himself and something fun to do to kill time before going to the airport.

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13 hours ago, icemiser69 said:

I don't think he will notice.  He will probably think that he drank it himself and just not remember how much was in the bottle.

True this.  Since Nicky has lived alone for 40 or so years, he's not used to having to keep an eye on his bottles.

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10 hours ago, Cementhead said:

Griffin Dunne is killing it as Nicky.  My heart breaks for him.  He doesn't even need to read a line; the pain and angst is right there on his face and in his stance and almost pained way of just moving.  I am totally picking up what he is laying down.  When he said he used to be a person?  Oh Boy. 

Then throw is Justin Hartley/Kevin.  Ugh.  Killing me.  The two of them are doing wonderful work together and I want much more of it. 

Griffin Dunne's performances have been such a treat.  I hope we get more of him.  Kevin has become my favorite of the Big 3 now.  He has grown so much as a person, or is that as a Pearson LOL, and Justin Hartley has reached his stride as an actor on this show, IMHO.

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10 hours ago, DoubleUTeeEff said:

I think Nicky said it best to Rebecca. "I am not a prop." That's something I think that Randall is especially guilty of--making people his prop rather than letting them be the human beings they are.

I think Nicky will keep his promise to Kevin about going to group once. He specifically said that he might not go twice but he will go once. I think if he were going to lie, he would just say he would go. I hope that Kevin visits him from time to time. If Nicky wants to live in a trailer and be mostly alone--let him--but I think it would be beneficial if he had at least one person who cared enough to visit with him every once and awhile.

I was surprised that Kevin turned out to be looking at a bottle. I thought he was looking at a picture of Jack or Jack and Nicky as kids or something heartfelt. 

For some reason, I thought Beth was totally lying to Randall about going to visit her mother but it looks like I was wrong about that too.

Agree with everything.  I didn't think Beth was walking out on Randall in a huff, but now that she has to visit her mother again, it's the segue into next episode's childhood dance drama which seems to be something Beth is blaming her mother of cutting short.  Now we know why the future Beth has a dance school.

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9 hours ago, nexxie said:

Please put some lipstick on “old” Rebecca!!!

And why does she walk around with her chin up, looking down her nose at everyone? Does she think old people do that? The opposite is common because if they are wearing bifocals they'd fall flat on their faces.

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8 hours ago, nexxie said:

Loved the aftershow with Justin and Griffin Dunne (old Nicky) - I really enjoy all the aftershows!

I don't usually watch them, but I just had to see this one!  I love Griffin Dunne.  Griffin for the Emmy win!

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1 hour ago, CrystalBlue said:

If Nicky wants to live in a trailer and be mostly alone--let him--but I think it would be beneficial if he had at least one person who cared enough to visit with him every once and awhile.

This is where I hope Kevin gets to. I wish he had seen that possibility.

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14 hours ago, ItCouldBeWorse said:

I thought he was going to tell her that Jack had been his Superman.

He didn’t miss how Rebecah was looking at him, treating him. It’s possible he wasn’t going to give her that one. Also, after what Jack did, and the years since then, it’s possible that memory would be just too painful to talk about.

I’d also watch the Kevin and Uncle Nick Show—just for the performances. These guys are a treat.

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Unwritten rule or not, I don't let unannounced strangers into my home. I'd rather hurt someone's feelings than risk getting killed. I used to live in an "up and coming" neighborhood where strangers ringing my doorbell with some sob story and asking to be let in was an almost monthly occurrence. Nope, not happening.

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1 hour ago, chocolatine said:

Unwritten rule or not, I don't let unannounced strangers into my home. I'd rather hurt someone's feelings than risk getting killed. I used to live in an "up and coming" neighborhood where strangers ringing my doorbell with some sob story and asking to be let in was an almost monthly occurrence. Nope, not happening.

Yeah I don’t think I would let people in my house either. I don’t like the idea of people I don’t know walking around my house and all that- something about it just bothers me and makes me feel uncomfortable. I get that people feel nostalgic but I don’t think I would do it.  

And yeah I agree with others that it’s even stranger for Randall and Kate to randomly go up to the house as it was completely different considering their house had burned down. The structure was probably totally different and it wasn’t just like “oh they changed this room and this room and the paint color, etc..” like it’s a totally different house in many ways. Also I think we are all supposed to think of how funny it was when William took Randall to his old house, it actually wasn’t that great; I remember William walked in and went to the fireplace and pulled out a brick to get something(I forgot what) and then walked out and left Randall to hand the brick back to the current owners. I mean yeah he didn’t damage anything but he wasn’t that friendly, he was kind of rude. I mean whatever. I guess it’s better than Randall having his great epiphany of the fact that “dad didn’t slip, he threw a plate” and causing the nice strangers  to be like “yeah, we thought you guys were just going to talk about sweet moments not to get into some serious family drama, we gotta go, get out” but yeah.

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I felt bad years ago, when a daughter of the previous owner came by visiting relatives and wanted to see my home, her old home. I said No for inside, I had 3 kids including toddler twins sleeping and house was a mess (always seems worse in these situations) We hadn't done anything to it, although kitchen was very old.  I actually felt embarrassed although she probably would have liked that since it would be more like she knew it.  Years later, when my mom moved and I saw old house and was bemoaning the ugly color they painted it, I would have loved to see if a drawing I made as a kid in paint was still on garage wall but I wouldn't ask.

I understand the need to see things but I also understand what that family did in show went beyond nice. I wish I could respond differently that day now but I don't think I did anything wrong either.

Edited by debraran
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I love Griffin Dunne and thought he was a great choice to play Nicky. I agree with everyone who was unhappy with how selfish Randall and Kate were but wonder if part of that is to also show how their characters are flawed. We know Kevin is, and we're finding out Jack was so it makes sense to show they aren't always perfect even if the characters themselves don't see their flaws. My favorite part of the whole show was when Kevin asked "Who's going to tell mom." and Kate and Randall shottied not. They immediately reverted back to kids and that is endearing. I also thought the editing and juxtaposition of kid Kevin and adult Kevin's facial expressions while driving home were spot on.

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I think Kate and Randall's decisions to return to their lives were meant to highlight Kevin's increasingly frazzled and driven state of mind. The place where he found himself alone, staring raptly at a bottle of bad whiskey as if this project had that goal, all along, and no other.  

Kevin's turning back to Nicky's home was a good gesture that slowly began to turn bad for him. (Somewhat like Jack's decision to "come for" Nicky at the base in Vietnam.) Kevin went back for Nicky, persuaded him to leave his home overnight, then stayed up alone until morning, googling local VA centers.  This messianic, "I know the way" impulse never allowed for simply asking Nicky, "Will you let me help? Maybe, take a look at that leak?" The impulse quickly became ambitious and in no way humble: the hard-won, mature humility that allows an addict to live in the world as it is -- rather than how they would have it, or thought it would be -- and still stay sober.

Kevin painted himself into a corner with The Nicky Project. He had undertaken it to learn more about his father, and it led him to Vietnam, Washington and Bradford. What he found on Songbird Road was deeply painful, assaulting his reverence for Jack at the same time it summoned his empathy for the close family member more like him, who Jack had rejected and kept from him. 

It did a number on Kevin, who doesn't have the resources to handle it. Not yet. He had only been beginning to work on the awareness that might enable him to make his way through such a minefield, when he declared himself cured (secretly: a secret he kept from himself) and poured himself a new love affair and project.  

By that morning in the motel, Kevin had already been up all night and was spinning his wheels, frustrated, not eating, unable to see or hear straight. In addict talk, he was full-on HALT: hungry, angry, lonely and tired. Any one of those temporary states can fire up compulsions, and all can in fact be put to rest by using. At once, like magic. Add to that, Kevin's turmoil around Jack and his distress in the face of Nicky's stoicism...

Randall and Kate were each still facing another long day of travel, in order to meet pre-existing commitments the next day. Kevin, like addicts everywhere, is great at feeling he's been abandoned, and even expressing it ("Meanwhile, where's Kevin? Oh I know: Kevin's dead!"). He isn't yet so great at dealing with the situation, real or not. His father's abandonment of "dead" Nicky in favor of Rebecca, Kate, Randall and Kevin himself, was a shell that landed squarely in his trench, and tore him up.

Was Kevin wrong to search through Jack's past? I don't think so. Was he right to seek out Nicky and turn back for him, once he found him? I think so. But he did so alone, like his father. Alone within his family, who didn't know the signs. The addict has one job: to stay mindful of their addiction. That's the one and only task for which they are indispensable. His siblings had been right to worry about what would happen to Kevin if he didn't find their uncle, and they came through for him on that. No one had a plan for what they found.

Adult Kevin staring out the window as his mother drove him home wasn't only reproaching himself for relapsing. Like Jack that Sunday morning in 1992, he was thinking about how he was going to get through the next six hours. He was thinking about his next drink. 

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3 hours ago, Pallas said:

I think Kate and Randall's decisions to return to their lives were meant to highlight Kevin's increasingly frazzled and driven state of mind. The place where he found himself alone, staring raptly at a bottle of bad whiskey as if this project had that goal, all along, and no other.  

Kevin's turning back to Nicky's home was a good gesture that slowly began to turn bad for him. (Somewhat like Jack's decision to "come for" Nicky at the base in Vietnam.) Kevin went back for Nicky, persuaded him to leave his home overnight, then stayed up alone until morning, googling local VA centers.  This messianic, "I know the way" impulse never allowed for simply asking Nicky, "Will you let me look at that leak?" The impulse quickly became ambitious and in no way humble: the hard-won, mature humility that allows an addict to live in the world as it is -- rather than how they would have it, or thought it would be -- and still stay sober.

Kevin painted himself into a corner with The Nicky Project. He had undertaken it to learn more about his father, and it led him to Vietnam, Washington and Bradford. What he found on Songbird Road was deeply painful, assaulting his reverence for Jack at the same time it summoned his empathy for the close family member more like him, who Jack had rejected and kept from him. 

It did a number on Kevin. And Kevin doesn't have the resources to handle it. He had only been beginning to work on the awareness that might enable him to make his way through such a minefield, when he declared himself cured (secretly: a secret he kept from himself) and poured himself a new love affair and project.  

By that morning in the motel, Kevin had already been up all night, was spinning his wheels, not eating, frustrated, unable to see or hear straight. In addict talk, he was full-on HALT: hungry, angry, lonely and tired. Along with his inner struggles around Jack, any one of those temporary states can fire up compulsions, and all can in fact be put to rest by using. At once, like magic. 

Randall and Kate were each still facing another long day of travel, in order to meet pre-existing commitments the next day. Kevin, like addicts everywhere, is great at feeling he's been abandoned, and even expressing it ("Meanwhile, where's Kevin? Oh I know: Kevin's dead!"). He isn't yet so great at dealing with the situation, real or not. His father's abandonment of "dead" Nicky in favor of Rebecca, Kate, Randall and Kevin himself, was a shell that landed squarely in his trench, and tore him up.

Was Kevin wrong to search through Jack's past? I don't think so. Was he right to seek out Nicky and turn back for him, once he found him? I think so. But he did so alone, like his father. Alone within his family, who didn't know the signs. The addict has one job: to stay mindful of their addiction. That's the one and only task for which they are indispensable. His siblings had been right to worry about what would happen to Kevin if he didn't find their uncle, and they came through for him on that. No one had a plan for what they found.

Adult Kevin staring out the window as his mother drove him home wasn't only reproaching himself for relapsing. Like Jack that Sunday morning in 1992, he was thinking about how he was going to get through the next six hours. He was thinking about his next drink. 

So much insight, thank you.  Kevin was not at all equipped to deal with whatever he found with Nicky, because even a person without a high need for continual self-awareness and care would be. The secretly alive-for-decades uncle alone portended it would not be smooth sailing for anybody. He really is a whole lot like Jack, trying to go it alone, pushing down his feelings and throwing himself into someone else, trying to fix. I hope he puts in a call to his therapist asap. 

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I couldn't stand how self-absorbed the main characters are. Not once did anyone say "It must have been terrible for Dad and Uncle Nicky to be estranged." No, it was all about "how dare Dad not let us know we had an uncle." And then when they meet Nicky in dire straits, it's all about their savior complexes instead of "what can we do for you, Nicky?" "Oh, Nick, can you tell me stories about the brother who disowned you?"

Nick is a grown-ass man! Kevin particularly should know that he can't make Nick stop drinking -- it has to come from Nick. He can say "here are some VA hospitals. If you're interested, I'd be happy to help you," or "I see your trailer is leaking, may I help you fix it?" And when Nicky doesn't want to do anything, just ask "would you be okay if I checked in with you once a year?" That's how I would have handled it.

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14 hours ago, deirdra said:

And why does she walk around with her chin up, looking down her nose at everyone? Does she think old people do that? The opposite is common because if they are wearing bifocals they'd fall flat on their faces.

Really!

14 hours ago, CrystalBlue said:

Yeah, what was that, the "I just got off an airplane and rushed over to this hotel" look?

They might be trying to make her lips look thinner by using lipstick sparingly, but it just looks ridiculous.

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