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PrincessPurrsALot

PrincessPurrsALot

As always I could  do with no Russell Brand.  Fortunately he was minimal. 

I have a soft spot for this show purely because of Dwayne Johnson.  I do like the thought of Spencer owning a team and fighting for players' rights.  I have a hard time seeing him be able to make a difference.  

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sjankis630

sjankis630

(edited)

Ballers S05 E01 – Protocol is for Losers

We Byke!

Rock/Spence is chilling on the beach watching the waves go by. His girlfriend who is dressed like a model who has had a surfing magazine throw up on her comes by to ask him to go surfing with her. (She has a board and everything). Umm who is this again? Wasn’t Spence trying to holler at sistah girl from last year (mother of Spence’s illegal recruit)?

Spence says no because he is too busy reading his real life fan – Elizabeth Warren’s book …on the beach. I am pretty sure Warren’s book has not been read within 10 miles of anywhere with significant sand and sun but I digress.

Spence gets a call and it is the owner of the Dallas Cowboys telling Spence that the Kansas City Chiefs are up for sale and Spence is just pretty enough to buy it. It would look good for the league. Spence says he will think about it and the scene ends with a shot around the back of the Rock’s huge bald head – with shades of Marcellus Wallace.

The shot is nice but it shows the complete beach and water all around Spencer and there is not a soul in sight including his girlfriend who just went out into the water to surf. Did she drown or get eaten by a shark?

Joe is in his Maserati blasting Nipsey Hustle on the stereo. Am I the only person who had never hear of Nipsey before he died? (don’t hate the song is bumpin’) He is driving out to meet Russel Brand! I was told there would be no Brand this season!

A quick look at imdb shows that the last significant role for Brand in the last 5 years is the animated movie Trolls. How fitting. I already hate this show for giving Brand a way back into civilization. (neg for you too Katy Perry!)

Brand is still vaping because of course he is. To his credit he is using the no smoke invisible mist vape vs the completely enveloping the entire car douche vape. Wait are they partners now? Did I forget last season completely? Yes I did because this show is essentially the football equivalent of the TV show Entourage in that you completely forget it one month after the season ends.

Joe says they are being evicted. Are they living together? That might actually be a good idea for a sitcom. (“One’s bald and one’s a Brit and they are both wacky!”) No they are just getting kicked from their office space. Joe is pissed but he has an idea to buy some land and develop it as a training facility for the potential football greats/suckers of the future. And by the way he has already made and offer on one of the parcels – without his partner(s) consultation.

We see coach Charles in his office now in a suit making someone else sweat for a change as he tries to get his team ready for the new season. “give me the stats of the stats of the stats on the guy …… etc” The owner of the team comes in – the actor has what looks like a completely different hairstyle – with some bad news. Ricky has tested positive for a banned substance. Ruh Roh! Charles badly pretends to be surprised.

Back at Ricky’s place his boy tries to hide the testing letter from the NFL but Ricky gets a text from Charles to come in and his boy gives him the bad news. Ricky is pissed – how could you let this happen? (umm you took the substance and are you really trusting your career to a guy who has a different messaged t-shirt every episode?)

Ricky is worried that Charles will cut him from the team and calls his agent Jayson to give him the news about the positive test and they make a horrible joke about him wanting it to be a positive test for AIDS instead of a banned substance. Ricky says no it is for Andro. (Androstenedione is a steroid hormone used by the body to make testosterone – thank you WebMD)

Jayson recommends he not fight it and take the 4 game suspension. Jayson calls Charles and somehow makes him believe that the team can’t live without Ricky. Jayson takes lemons and makes Jay’s Hard Lemonade by getting Ricky an extension to his contract and suddenly Ricky is smiling like Denzel on the Fences movie poster.

That is until Ricky walks out into the street without looking and I kid you not is hit by a car.

(the fuck!?)

Back at the office with Joe apparently this is a year after the split with Spencer and this “office” more closely resembles the lido deck on a cruise ship rather than an actual place of work. Reg shows up with a large pink box of doughnuts which just says “doughnuts” on the side of it. What’s the matter show Dunkin wouldn’t pay enough? Reg wants to be more involved with the firm and is pissed that Joe didn’t tell him about the eviction directly and that he has placed a bid on the land. We know he is serious here because he is actually wearing sport coat with his white t-shirt and jeans. He wants to prove himself more than just being Vernon’s boy.

It looks like they are literally trying to tie everyone into the plot in the first 3 minutes of the first episode of the season. This does not bode well IMHO.

Spence is shown being interviewed about his upbringing and it shows his dad being super tough on him and his brother training them for football. It also shows his brother not reacting to the tuff love well and quitting a session. I guess this is to show that is why his brother got on drugs and is dead and Spence is rich and successful. Except that Spence is dishonest, selfish, addicted to prescriptions and thought he was going to die….. oops.

There is also no way this kid in the montage could ever grow up to look anything like the same species as the Rock.

We cut back to Spence at his palatial mansion with his girlfriend. She is dressed like  an older model hanging out between magazine shoots. What does she do for a living again? (Barista? Lawyer? Astronaut?) No need to worry she has an outfit for each.

Spence wants her opinion about the Chiefs deal and she is not exactly sure if she has a Chiefs outfit but doesn’t Spence have a bald Svengali named Joe who he could call about it? Spence declines and texts no go on the Chiefs deal.

The next scene has Joe berating a new hire for not following up on an important client and he is told to chill by Russell Brand. Joe is upset because he finds out that there are multiple bids on the property he wants to buy. He only wants one of the two lots but now the owner will only sell them both together and Joe refuses.

Now we are at an E-sports event. (show is current yo!) and Reg and Vernon are checking out the action. Vernon thinks he should branch out and maybe start to become an e=sport athlete and Reggie makes a funny joke about him being a Tyler Perry stunt double.

Spence reminisces about trying to impress his big brother by foolishly jumping into some water 50 feet up and breaks his arm in the process. His big bro had to jump in a rescue him. He reveals even though he always spends time around water he has a problem with it ever since then. Meanwhile the league sends a hottie (Candice – different actress?) over to convince Spencer to reconsider the Chiefs deal. Spence talks like he doesn’t want it but she uses the fact that he is always helping the other players and he would be the first majority black owner. Spence says doesn’t want to be a savior but the Rock likes what she is cooking.

Joe calls Spence looking for a friend and wants to get his advice about the land deal and Spence blows him off by telling him he is about to do something important by buying the Kansas City Chiefs. Joe gets pissed and is now all in on buying both lots.

Spence agrees to buy the team but he is "going to run the motherfucker my way.”

Back out to the beach Marcellus Wallace is back looking at the water and overcomes his fear and walks out into the surf like a boss.

End of episode ………….

Edited by sjankis630
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luckyroll3

luckyroll3

Thanks for the recap @sjankis630.  I thought that maybe I just wasn't paying attention (cause this show is real dumb and I usually multitask when it is on) and I missed it, but was there really no follow-up to the lawsuit? Or to the kid choosing USC over Ohio State.  I'm not really surprised because this show likes to forget story lines all the time....  

7 hours ago, sjankis630 said:

His girlfriend who is dressed like a model who has had a surfing magazine throw up on her comes by to ask him to go surfing with her. (She has a board and everything). Umm who is this again?

That' was his gf from the first 2 seasons.  She's a TV reporter or something like that.  

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Michichick

Michichick

The doughnut box didn’t just say doughnuts on the side. It had some brand name I never heard of. I don’t know why I feel the need to mention this.

I will watch this season until the end because I love Dwayne Johnson, but lord this show is terrible. Absolutely no follow up on the NCAA lawsuit. I hope we get some flashbacks eventually. I hate how this show drops storylines and just has Spencer jump from opportunity to opportunity with no logical transition. He’s a money manager! He’s pitching for a team to move to Vegas! He owns an extreme sports company! He’s pimping some high school football player! He’s suing the NCAA! What the fuck?

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Stallion12

Stallion12

On 8/30/2019 at 12:40 PM, Michichick said:

The doughnut box didn’t just say doughnuts on the side. It had some brand name I never heard of. I don’t know why I feel the need to mention this.

I will watch this season until the end because I love Dwayne Johnson, but lord this show is terrible. Absolutely no follow up on the NCAA lawsuit. I hope we get some flashbacks eventually. I hate how this show drops storylines and just has Spencer jump from opportunity to opportunity with no logical transition. He’s a money manager! He’s pitching for a team to move to Vegas! He owns an extreme sports company! He’s pimping some high school football player! He’s suing the NCAA! What the fuck?

I've noticed, I still can't remember when Joe and lance got along again.

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PrincessPurrsALot

PrincessPurrsALot

After learning of competing owner offers, Spencer engages with past allies. Joe is tasked with apologizing for creating a hostile work environment with the help of Kate, a sharp Sports X exec. Ricky and Vernon each consider different kinds of futures, while Charles tries to hide some unwelcome news.

Original air date 2019.09.01

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luckyroll3

luckyroll3

On 8/31/2019 at 6:34 PM, Stallion12 said:

I've noticed, I still can't remember when Joe and lance got along again.

I only know this because I recently watched the previous season (after realizing I never actually finished it), but near the end of last season, Joe went to Lance to get Lance to change what he was offering for Joe and Spencer to buy him out of the company.  It was still a low ball offer, but Lance said he would drop the entire thing if Joe dropped Spencer and partnered only with him, which supposedly was his original plan since him and Joe were apparently besties (yeah, I don't know).  So when Spencer pulled out of the company because of the lawsuit (and also because he wasn't paying any fucking attention to what was happening in the company cause he's a douche and shitty partner), it was a quick and easy solution to Joe's problem and he could move on with the partnership with his BFF, Lance.   

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Ottis

Ottis

(edited)

Haven’t watched this show since giving up a few seasons ago when it went away from football and started in with side investments. Yep, it’s still stupid. Sometimes the characters are stupid, sometimes the plots are stupid and sometimes it’s just stupid in general. 

In this episode.... Joe has to apologize, some college prospect gets involved in a shoot out, apparently Ricky has surgery and refuses to talk to the doctor, and the dufus DT wants to play video games for a living (and Reggie is the voice of reason?!). Ugh. I deleted it at 16:45, on account of lack of any damn sense. 

Edited by Ottis
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Pallida

Pallida

I would love to see them accurately portray eSports, but I know they won’t. It can be quite lucrative, but careers in games like League of Legends are for the young due to reaction times. 

Many players go on to making money by streaming afterwards. I don’t know if there would be conflict of interest stuff to doing that, but Vernon would probably do way better at that than trying to be a pro eSports player. 

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Stallion12

Stallion12

8 hours ago, luckyroll3 said:

I only know this because I recently watched the previous season (after realizing I never actually finished it), but near the end of last season, Joe went to Lance to get Lance to change what he was offering for Joe and Spencer to buy him out of the company.  It was still a low ball offer, but Lance said he would drop the entire thing if Joe dropped Spencer and partnered only with him, which supposedly was his original plan since him and Joe were apparently besties (yeah, I don't know).  So when Spencer pulled out of the company because of the lawsuit (and also because he wasn't paying any fucking attention to what was happening in the company cause he's a douche and shitty partner), it was a quick and easy solution to Joe's problem and he could move on with the partnership with his BFF, Lance.   

Thank you, must have missed that scene last year.

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TV Diva Queen

TV Diva Queen

I don't remember if I quit this last season and didn't watch a few episodes or if its just that bad and I should have quit last season.  When you have a 25 minute show, it needs to be action packed, NOTHING happened yesterday.  Its the same old story, Spencer is running around with women we don't know and is looking for financing.  Ugh, I really like Dwayne and I hate to leave him, but I might have to .  😞

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marcee

marcee

So many dropped plot points... I don't know where to start.

NCAA lawsuit. What happened there?
Are we to assume Spencer caved in order to allow his little buddy to be eligible? They didn't make that clear at all.

Last we checked, Spencer was doing little buddy's mom. I guess that's over too?

What happened with buying a stadium? Does he own a stadium now?

Mostly, I just want to know how Spencer is suddenly so flush that he's got a gorgeous beach house on a private beach and can afford to retire.

Wasn't he in debt to his eyeballs a second ago?

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PrincessPurrsALot

PrincessPurrsALot

Spencer faces pressure from all sides as he fights for Kisan. Ricky gets mixed feedback about his radio show. Reggie, Vernon and Lance struggle to convince Joe to get into the gaming business. Charles works hard to land a big player. Jason goes through tough negotiations with the Anderson brothers.

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PrincessPurrsALot

PrincessPurrsALot

In the wake of an unexpected tragedy, Spencer prepares for his first owners meeting. While trying to balance work and his relationship with Kate, Joe decides to go on Ricky's radio show. Charles deals with an unexpected health crisis in the middle of his busiest time at work. Vernon, Reggie and Lance try to recruit a trio of gaming siblings for their new league. Jason celebrates his anniversary.

Original air date 2019.09.29

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Traveller519

Traveller519

(edited)

Because this is Ballers...

Does the Series end in any other way than Spencer hiring Charles to be his GM, who trades for Vernon, who is able to use Arrowhead Stadium to host his ESports team, who is so successful and makes so much money that SportsX is able to fully fund their "Campus" concept, which hires Ricky to be the "Program Director" since he can speak so much truth?

Edited by Traveller519
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PrincessPurrsALot

PrincessPurrsALot

When Spencer returns to the Sports X offices to work out a major player deal, he and Joe air past grievances and later, Spencer makes a big public statement that's sure to have consequences. Charles mulls over a new deal from Werner after getting a wakeup call about his health. Ricky gets defensive in a meeting with a Hollywood bigwig who has ambitious plans for his future. Vernon, Reggie and Lance arrive at their first Esports tournament as underdogs.

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PrincessPurrsALot

PrincessPurrsALot

Despite having a bullseye on his back, Spencer refuses to back down in his fight for the league's players. Joe embraces a new state of mind as he finds peace with himself. Julie encourages Charles to take care of unfinished business. Ricky decides to strike out on his own with his latest project. Reggie takes the next step in his career, with some encouragement from Vernon.

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Marley

Marley

(edited)

This whole gaming shit is annoying. It is not entertaining to watch ppl play games.

The ending was weird and what was the point of the whole Ricky filming Spencer thing. This show is kind of stupid and shitty now.

Edited by Marley
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sjankis630

sjankis630

2 hours ago, Marley said:

This show is kind of stupid and shitty now.

I agree. That is why I couldn't bring myself to recap it. I can't sit through an episode anymore. The whole e-gaming part screams of a "Dad trying to hang with the kids in the basement" vibe. 

Did HBO think they had to attract a younger audience? 

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Michichick

Michichick

8 hours ago, Marley said:

This whole gaming shit is annoying. It is not entertaining to watch ppl play games.

The ending was weird and what was the point of the whole Ricky filming Spencer thing. This show is kind of stupid and shitty now.

Well, at least it’s over, so we don’t have more episodes to be disappointed in. What a lame ending, with the NFL owners caving to what Spencer wants because he got some players to post their injuries on Instagram. 

I still want to know wtf happened with last season’s storyline of Spencer taking on the NCAA.

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luckyroll3

luckyroll3

This was a mess.  I watched the final episode and didn't even realize it was the finale.  It was so lackluster and eye roll inducing.  

I'm glad it's over though, cause the only reason I watched this was to see The Rock walking around in all his perfectly tailored suits and to occasionally catch a glimpse of his bare ass.  And he didn't even take off his clothes once this season!  What a waste.

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Marley

Marley

(edited)

This was the series finale? Wtf this makes the episode even worse.

They kept saying how amazing the film was pf the rock talking but like what was so amazing about it lol. 

Edited by Marley
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