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Jenelle: Birther Of 3, Mother To None


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Everyone knows Ensley does not have Down syndrome. Posts suggesting that she does will be removed and warnings issued. Posts such as these leave the impression that an arguably unflattering picture could somehow be construed as a child being disabled is considered ableist and is against the rules of the board.

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1 hour ago, Snarky McSnarky said:

So they acknowledge her one and only product is shit.  Good to know.

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This is where I get confused. I’m a pretty big makeup enthusiast, and I love to follow indie brands. To my knowledge, the owners won’t put a product out until the samples they receive are good enough to charge people money for them. So is Jenelle claiming she liked the tester, but the company she used sent a different, worse performing product for sale? It does not add up to me.

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46 minutes ago, harleybeanswind said:

This is where I get confused. I’m a pretty big makeup enthusiast, and I love to follow indie brands. To my knowledge, the owners won’t put a product out until the samples they receive are good enough to charge people money for them. So is Jenelle claiming she liked the tester, but the company she used sent a different, worse performing product for sale? It does not add up to me.

None of Jenelle's lies add up.

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My theory is Jenelle is a trash pig who knows as much about make up as she does about raising children (or chickens) and having a healthy relationship with her partners. All she did was find someone to manufacture an "eyebrow kit" that she had zero input in developing or testing, slapped a shitty Word-generated logo on it, and called it a day thinking her "fan base" would buy it up. When it turned out to be shit, like everything else Jenelle does, she takes no responsibility for it and blames someone else. 

This is the story of her "eyebrow kit" and literally everything else in her life. She admits no personal responsibility for anything

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21 hours ago, Tatum said:

Jenelle is less violent than David, but I can't forget that she had three kids as a means to an end and has never given two shits about any of them, and has actively sabotaged any chance of them having any kind of normal life.

David did all those things too. He actively sabotaged Marissa’s chance to live with her grandmother who loved her and wanted her. David has 3 kids and has never done the right thing by any of them. They are both awful but I think David is more evil and violent and a danger to more people. Thus he is worse. 

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15 hours ago, lovesnark said:

I think they are equally vile, each in their own disgusting ways.

I think he'll stick around until they are totally broke, then he'll move back in with his mom.  They really don't have much to fight over in a divorce except who will get stuck making the mortgage payments on the sinking prefab and who gets custody of Enchilada. He'll fight for custody because he'll want a child support check and he believes the unfortunate children he fathered are his possessions. Jenelle doesn't give a shit about THE LAND, but he likes it and I think she'll wind up moving back to town after fighting over it for a while and he'll go back to the swamp with a new, ignorant fool who can have babies. Jenelle will move back in with Barb and try to get herself on every trashy reality show she can.

The thing is though, if he dumps her right when they first reach the broke stage (probably in about 3 months), she'll just run right back to MTV, and in a few months be making $400K a year while he sponges off his mom and sister at a working class level. Jenelle will buy get a new boyfriend and lavish him with toys and vacations and will also be able to afford attorneys again. I think that would just make David seethe, and I think he is savvy enough (or perhaps predatory enough) to realize this. So, I think he will stick with her even after they're broke, until he is sure she's burned every single bridge possible (and has gained enough weight to be unattractive to all men and amateur porn producers), and then leave.  He won't want to leave any possibility of her being any kind of success without him.

1 hour ago, Scarlett45 said:

David did all those things too. He actively sabotaged Marissa’s chance to live with her grandmother who loved her and wanted her. David has 3 kids and has never done the right thing by any of them. They are both awful but I think David is more evil and violent and a danger to more people. Thus he is worse. 

Yes, I think I can agree they are equally awful parents, but when it comes to bystanders not related to them, Jenelle is less of a threat than David.

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If you haven’t, I highly suggest you check out the reviews on Jenelle’s makeup website.

Hysterical. Fucking hysterical.

Mr. DC, the dog and I just got back from brunch. It’s basically 14 pages of her being trolled. Mr. DC had to help me with some of the names. He thinks what’s funny is what a 12-year old does (he told me to say it out loud slowly, but softly). He said people either thought I was drunk (dead sober) or he was the funniest motherfucker in the world. 

She’s a complete idiot. Even thanked somebody for their comment. Or she’s just too lazy to even check her own website. They were all five star reviews though! Five star fucking hilarious. Well done!

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7 hours ago, Jennifersdc said:

If you haven’t, I highly suggest you check out the reviews on Jenelle’s makeup website.

Hysterical. Fucking hysterical.

Mr. DC, the dog and I just got back from brunch. It’s basically 14 pages of her being trolled. Mr. DC had to help me with some of the names. He thinks what’s funny is what a 12-year old does (he told me to say it out loud slowly, but softly). He said people either thought I was drunk (dead sober) or he was the funniest motherfucker in the world. 

She’s a complete idiot. Even thanked somebody for their comment. Or she’s just too lazy to even check her own website. They were all five star reviews though! Five star fucking hilarious. Well done!

I straight up witch cackled at Connie Lingus. 😂 

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5 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

Is this Jenelle and David?!! What did they do to the geese??? Did they burn his beak poor thing?

She claims, “my geese’s beak is just dirty” she says they don’t have any infection. Then mentions how depressed everyone is making her. 🙄 

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On 10/11/2019 at 5:13 PM, Clawdel said:

If you're in need of some laughs at the Eason's expense, check out Nugget Studios on YouTube. DJ Nugget in da house! This channel has also set Jimmy Buffet's classic song "You're An Asshole" to Swamp Monster's atrocious posturing. 

I just scream-laughed out loud at work on this video when this imposed fart happened.  I was trying to be all cool, listening down low so no one would know I was watching a Jenelle video and told on myself with that scream.  

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On 10/13/2019 at 1:21 PM, druzy said:

Someone posted this before and after on Reddit. I hate these animal abusers!

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What in the seven hells is wrong with that goose? What does the caption mean? I'm so confused and upset. 

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On 10/12/2019 at 10:15 PM, harleybeanswind said:

I straight up witch cackled at Connie Lingus. 😂 

The reviews can be even funnier than the names.

She actually thanked “Jack Goff” (even I got that one on the first go) for their comment how “her eyebrow kit saved his marriage”. My favorite is the one who put their review in all caps with almost every other word misspelled, chastising haters for putting down an “excellant” product. They know of at least 50 people who would buy eyeliners immediately if she started “makeing” them. That took effort.

Mr. DC has a good eye. He noticed that the name of her company is JE Cosmetics Incorporation. Morons. Is there anybody with even a single brain cell advising her?

Can’t really opine on goose’s bill. Don’t know enough about what’s normal or not - except I know they probably fucked that poor goose up. I’m confident they haven’t vaccinated a single one of those animals.

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On 10/13/2019 at 11:21 AM, druzy said:

Someone posted this before and after on Reddit. I hate these animal abusers!

image.thumb.png.03d784b2f6ceb43be05ff21b07305028.png

Guys, don't think for a nano second that I'm defending Thundercunt or her piece of garbage huzbin. I'd rather poke myself in the eye with a hot  needle or chew on some broken glass. But...................it just looks like the goose's bill is dirty. In some of the other pics, it shows the whole goose is dirty. Their bills have ridges and dents in them and they change and get bigger and deeper as they age. They're waterfowl and need access to a watersource to bathe and clean themselves. She used to post pics of filling a up a kiddie pool for them to bathe in, I guess she's too fucking lazy to do that anymore. For fuck's sake, fill up one of the dozens of 5 gallon buckets that are laying around the swamp so they can at least clean their bills!

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21 hours ago, harleybeanswind said:

She claims, “my geese’s beak is just dirty” she says they don’t have any infection. Then mentions how depressed everyone is making her. 🙄 

That doesn’t look like dirt Jenelle. I’m getting more convinced only a fairly small percentage of the world’s population is more stupider than you (credit to Mother Chantal). 

Your goose’s beak looks like it has a few  indentations where it shouldn’t. May I suggest probably gouges? Even if it’s not the same goose (and the other geese did it), get it checked out you fucking moron.
 

Though psycho Moron #2, probably has “beliefs” that prevent that (and a dwindling bank account). That’s the way he was brought up! STFU Jenelle.

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29 minutes ago, lovesnark said:

Guys, don't think for a nano second that I'm defending Thundercunt or her piece of garbage huzbin. I'd rather poke myself in the eye with a hot  needle or chew on some broken glass. But...................it just looks like the goose's bill is dirty. In some of the other pics, it shows the whole goose is dirty. Their bills have ridges and dents in them and they change and get bigger and deeper as they age. They're waterfowl and need access to a watersource to bathe and clean themselves. She used to post pics of filling a up a kiddie pool for them to bathe in, I guess she's too fucking lazy to do that anymore. For fuck's sake, fill up one of the dozens of 5 gallon buckets that are laying around the swamp so they can at least clean their bills!

I’d never think you’re defending Thundercunt! The horror!
 

I did finally zoom in on the images as best I could. I thought I could make out the natural indentations, but their seemed to be two on each side, not just one (hence gouges). I literally spent 30 minutes trying to figure it out on the Internet and got nowhere.

Edited by Jennifersdc
And then they’re the strange puncture wounds on the top left. Geese don’t have teeth.
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40 minutes ago, lovesnark said:

Guys, don't think for a nano second that I'm defending Thundercunt or her piece of garbage huzbin. I'd rather poke myself in the eye with a hot  needle or chew on some broken glass. But...................it just looks like the goose's bill is dirty. In some of the other pics, it shows the whole goose is dirty. Their bills have ridges and dents in them and they change and get bigger and deeper as they age. They're waterfowl and need access to a watersource to bathe and clean themselves. She used to post pics of filling a up a kiddie pool for them to bathe in, I guess she's too fucking lazy to do that anymore. For fuck's sake, fill up one of the dozens of 5 gallon buckets that are laying around the swamp so they can at least clean their bills!

Now you got me on the geese rant. WTF does she even have these? Does she actually realize she’s living on a swamp and think that’s fine enough a watersource? How far away are they from a river? Like they’d come back.


I’m OG Long Island, NY - so I do know a bit about geese (ours were the Canadian kind and numerous).
 

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Yeah, I really don’t understand why she has geese as pets?  To me they are gross and stinky birds who really serve no purpose (sorry not sorry).  They don’t lay edible eggs (I don’t think)?  So why does she have them??  

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2 hours ago, geauxaway said:

Yeah, I really don’t understand why she has geese as pets?  To me they are gross and stinky birds who really serve no purpose (sorry not sorry).  They don’t lay edible eggs (I don’t think)?  So why does she have them??  

I think she got them because she heard they are a good deterrent to airborne predators to help keep the chickens from getting eaten by hawks and/or eagles. Believe it or not, it's true. An eagle will think twice about swooping down and grabbing a chicken if a goose is there to go after it. But, not with the staggering amount of chickens they've amassed or with the amount of property they run around on.  Also, they were cute baby goslings when she got them. We all know how much she loves getting baby animals because they're cute, then they either die before they grow up because she doesn't bother to learn about what they need to be healthy, are given away when they grow up or, since Nugget, will get killed if they defend themselves when the golden child won't stop pestering them. Her geese are sexually mature now and will start going after the kids and anything/anyone else they think is on their turf. Goose bites HURT! Their bills are serrated on the edges to snip grass and when they bite, it usually leaves a blood blister.

Goose eggs are edible, but they're a bit grainy and tough. I used to sell mine to a woman who would blow the egg out of the shell and carve and paint the shells into beautiful pieces of art.

The geese themselves don't smell bad, at all. But, they shit huge piles of green poop and it's amazing how much shit one animal can produce!

Edited by lovesnark
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6 hours ago, ghoulina said:

What in the seven hells is wrong with that goose? What does the caption mean? I'm so confused and upset. 

I'm confused too. I thought it was a duck 🤷‍♂️

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58 minutes ago, druzy said:

I'm confused too. I thought it was a duck 🤷‍♂️

Don't worry, I've had damn near every type of farm bird there is over the years. I'll keep you schooled!😂

They are Sebastapol geese. Their feathers grow all twisty and curvy, that's why so many people were freaking out when they started getting their adult plumage. They thought Thundercunt was doing something to them to cause their feathers to be all funky. I had one years and years ago. It was beautiful but hated my daughter, who was 3 at the time. Instead of murdering it, I gave it to a friend who had a huge pond and lots of other waterfowl.

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1 hour ago, blubld43 said:

Are these two friends now? She had Sophia with her too, that poor little girl. And I wonder why Farrah wore a trash bag?

I would have never known that was Farrah had she not been mentioned. She looks like a tragic 50-year old washed-up cam girl.

And nothing says "klassy" more than a backdrop manufactured from astroturf. 

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1 hour ago, Giant Misfit said:

I would have never known that was Farrah had she not been mentioned. She looks like a tragic 50-year old washed-up cam girl.

And nothing says "klassy" more than a backdrop manufactured from astroturf. 

Didn't Kail have an AstroTurf backdrop at her Pot Head launch party? Is this a thing?!?

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Edited by Stusan
ETA: Yes, she did!
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23 minutes ago, Stusan said:

Didn't Kail have an AstroTurf backdrop at her Pot Head launch party? Is this a thing?!?

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Yes.  Kail confirmed it was the same one.  😆 It was pretty funny. Wish I could find the tweet. 

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1 hour ago, Mkay said:

Yes.  Kail confirmed it was the same one.  😆 It was pretty funny. Wish I could find the tweet. 

And, Johnny Donovan had a party for another client a few days before Jenelle's and used the same backdrop. The only difference was the neon sign they tossed up there before the 10 or 15 people showed up😂

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13 hours ago, blubld43 said:

Are these two friends now? She had Sophia with her too, that poor little girl. And I wonder why Farrah wore a trash bag?

Wow. Her face looks like one of those plastic Barbie masks in the 80s. I think my cousin dressed up as Barbie circa 1987 with the mask- I should dig through my mom's albums and find it and I bet the resemblance is uncanny.

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17 hours ago, DNR said:

Maybe juhnelle & Lurch could do a season of Marriage Boot Camp like Farrah and Amber . Other than that those two fools are unemployable

There was a short period of time after Lurch was fired when they kept saying they were going to be on that show. People flooded the websites, emails, and twitter accounts for MBC, their producers, and WeTV(? whatever channel) only for the show to release a statement that there were no plans for them to appear on any of their shows. 

Lurch had successfully alienated and scared off any hopes for him to appear on anything, because he's violent and stupid.

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3 hours ago, Christina said:

There was a short period of time after Lurch was fired when they kept saying they were going to be on that show. People flooded the websites, emails, and twitter accounts for MBC, their producers, and WeTV(? whatever channel) only for the show to release a statement that there were no plans for them to appear on any of their shows. 

Lurch had successfully alienated and scared off any hopes for him to appear on anything, because he's violent and stupid.

I keep wondering why Jenelle is still with this man. Is it dependence? Insecurity? Could it actually be some scary, twisted form of love?

I can't bring myself to feel pity for her becausethe abuse she has subjected her children to is horrendous, but what is her motivation to stay? She strikes me as someone entirely self serving, and this relationship is costing her everything. 

Edited by elsie
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7 hours ago, elsie said:

She strikes me as someone entirely self serving, and this relationship is costing her everything. 

I think she's still there because Jenelle has finally met her abusive, narcissistic, sociopath equal (or he might even be a tad more so than Jenelle). 

Edited by MyPeopleAreNordic
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9 hours ago, elsie said:

I keep wondering why Jenelle is still with this man. Is it dependence? Insecurity? Could it actually be some scary, twisted form of love?

I can't bring myself to feel pity for her becausethe abuse she has subjected her children to is horrendous, but what is her motivation to stay? She strikes me as someone entirely self serving, and this relationship is costing her everything. 

My take on it is Nathan did an extreme number on her self esteem. I mean, Nathan is not a prize for most people, but on his worst day, he was still way out of Jenelle's league. And while her fame and money definitely attracted him, I don't think he was using her. I think he honestly did care about her. And then one day he didn't, and I think that really sent her reeling. Add to that that he's gotten better after they broke up, and moved on to a better partner.

David, meanwhile, may have cost her everything, but he hasn't left her- yet. And we all know Jenelle fears being alone above all else. Sure, if they split she could get back on TM2 and earn a huge salary again, but no guarantees she'd be able to get a guy who'd stand by her. David probably seems like a sure bet to her.

And she's delusional enough to think that her crazy ass fans will translate into large earning power even without MTV.

When they do become completely broke, it will be interesting to see which one cracks first. Obviously David seems like the obvious choice, but Jenelle could still surprise us.

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On 10/14/2019 at 9:57 PM, Giant Misfit said:

I would have never known that was Farrah had she not been mentioned. She looks like a tragic 50-year old washed-up cam girl.

And nothing says "klassy" more than a backdrop manufactured from astroturf. 

Farrah must be addicted to cosmetic surgery/fillers/Botox. She looks like a plastic version of herself. That girl is so overloaded with procedures it's insane...and it doesn't make her look attractive at all...hideous.

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11 hours ago, lovesnark said:

I think she stays because she's completely unable to admit she's wrong. Ever. About anything. If she left him, she would be forced to admit everything people have been saying about him since  day one is true. That will never happen. I mean, look at her history with him. She's had a gazillion opportunities to kick his nasty ass to the curb and she probably would have gotten sympathy AND kept her $400k a year job. Instead, she makes up more and more outlandish lies to try to paint herself (and him) as happy. Because she simply cannot admit she was wrong.

Totally agree. Yet if he were to leave her, she can get the sympathy of being left, and "escaping" such a terrible relationship.

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30 minutes ago, FairyDusted said:

Soulmate #2 just got a DUI. Nathan has a new mugshot y’all . Poor Kaiser. Kid has nobody. I saw the mugshot on Instagram but I think Ashley has it. 

The article is in the post below. I thought I was adding it to this post.
Edited by druzy
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15 minutes ago, druzy said:
Quote

Nathan Griffith has been arrested in North Carolina for driving while impaired.

The former Teen Mom 2 dad — and baby daddy of Jenelle Evans— was reportedly picked up by Wake County cops on Thursday. He was still sitting behind bars at press time.

Nathan is currently being held on a $10,000 bail, according to court records. He has an “awaiting trial” status, and is set to go before a judge on Friday.

In his latest mugshot, Nathan looks relatively clean cut, mugging for the camera in a collared shirt. 

image.png.2e3faf1ff4f92f39d3a7b9baeb4289da.png

This is not the first time Nathan has been arrested. He has been arrested numerous times (or, as Jenelle would say, “numerous of times”), with the majority of the arrests being alcohol-related. In June 2016, Nate was picked up in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina, and hauled into jail on original charges of disorderly conduct, public intoxication, impairment and endangering himself and others.

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Jenelle’s face when she hears about Nathan’s arrest…probably…

In 2015, he was arrested at the home he was sharing with Jenelle at the time for domestic assault. (This was the infamous “why am I a guy?” arrest.) In September 2013, he was arrested for driving under the influence (his second offense at the time) as well as resisting arrest and other charges.

So far Jenelle and her husband David Eason have not commented on Nate’s arrest but…The Ashley suspects there will be plenty of comment from The Land any time now…

This will no doubt hurt Nathan’s custody case. As The Ashley previously reported, Nathan and Jenelle have been locked in a bitter custody war for their son Kaiser for years, and Nathan has been attempting to fight for full custody of the boy. However, this arrest could spell trouble for his case. 

The Ashley will update this story when more info is available! 

(Photos: MTV; Wake County Sheriff’s Department) 

Edited by druzy
ETA: I thought I edited my above post to include the article but I made a new post. 
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2 hours ago, druzy said:

This is not the first time Nathan has been arrested. He has been arrested numerous times (or, as Jenelle would say, “numerous of times”), with the majority of the arrests being alcohol-related. In June 2016, Nate was picked up in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina, and hauled into jail on original charges of disorderly conduct, public intoxication, impairment and endangering himself and others.

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Jenelle’s face when she hears about Nathan’s arrest…probably…

In 2015, he was arrested at the home he was sharing with Jenelle at the time for domestic assault. (This was the infamous “why am I a guy?” arrest.) In September 2013, he was arrested for driving under the influence (his second offense at the time) as well as resisting arrest and other charges.

So far Jenelle and her husband David Eason have not commented on Nate’s arrest but…The Ashley suspects there will be plenty of comment from The Land any time now…

This will no doubt hurt Nathan’s custody case. As The Ashley previously reported, Nathan and Jenelle have been locked in a bitter custody war for their son Kaiser for years, and Nathan has been attempting to fight for full custody of the boy. However, this arrest could spell trouble for his case. 

The Ashley will update this story when more info is available! 

(Photos: MTV; Wake County Sheriff’s Department) 

NATHAN.

teen mom 2 jenelle evans GIF

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9 hours ago, FairyDusted said:

Soulmate #2 just got a DUI. Nathan has a new mugshot y’all . Poor Kaiser. Kid has nobody. I saw the mugshot on Instagram but I think Ashley has it. 

Damn it, Nathan. Even if this didn't impact his custody case (and it will), I can't get excited about Kaiser potentially living with him full time if this is the kind of poor judgment/addict issues he'll have to navigate.

At this point, all we can hope for is David leaving Jenelle sooner rather than later, and Jenelle handing over custody of Kaiser to Nathan without a fuss because trying to get a new man with two young kids is going to be a challenge. But that also means Ensley will go to David.

This whole situation is heartbreaking.

On 10/16/2019 at 10:14 PM, lovesnark said:

I think she stays because she's completely unable to admit she's wrong. Ever. About anything. If she left him, she would be forced to admit everything people have been saying about him since  day one is true. That will never happen. I mean, look at her history with him. She's had a gazillion opportunities to kick his nasty ass to the curb and she probably would have gotten sympathy AND kept her $400k a year job. Instead, she makes up more and more outlandish lies to try to paint herself (and him) as happy. Because she simply cannot admit she was wrong.

That too. I'd laugh that her pride is costing her everything else, but she's dragging three innocent kids down with her. Four if you count Maryssa, who probably could have lived with her grandma without Jenelle bankrolling the legal bills.

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