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The Mime That Raped Thylvia: Darkest Moments


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It was actually Caroline's parents that Charles had fetched from the train station only to find out that her mother had died en route.  So Caroline runs to the back of the wagon to see her mother and sees a coffin instead.  A little warning would have been nice, Charles.  That's the "Mom is a little stiff from the trip" episode.

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That one upset Mom. A lot.

 

How about the time Charles came home (with his father?) but failed to tell Caroline his mother's body was in a box in the back in time?

 

Speaking of Carrie, how about the LSD ep with her seeing giant strawberries and such?

Ugh yes, The Godsister was awful. I've only seen it once and I don't plan to watch it again. If they wanted to try to give the Greenbush sisters a chance to show their "acting skills", that wasn't the script to do so.

What about that episode where the soldier comes home and he has some from of PTSD or something, and he has flashbacks and stuff and in the end it's implied that he commits suicide? I always disliked that one as a kid; it scared me just as bad as Slyvia.

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What about that episode where the soldier comes home and he has some from of PTSD or something, and he has flashbacks and stuff and in the end it's implied that he commits suicide? I always disliked that one as a kid; it scared me just as bad as Slyvia.

That one was just on yesterday or the day before. I never could figure out how he died. I thought maybe he had fallen from his horse and broke his neck while doped up on morphine.

The flashback scenes of the battle of Shiloh are really bizarre, made doubly so as all I could see Branville (?) as is "that guy from Soap".

This episode was one where Mary got too involved with a creepy older guy rather than Laura for a change. (And again Charles and Caroline weren't even phased by it.) "My friend Mr. Whipple." What business did a girl her age have being "friends" with a man old enough to be her father?

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I can't think of anything new to add to the thread, but I absolutely must chime in on the absolute horror of Albert puking mor-PHINE, the rats/tainted cornmeal, and the guy setting himself on fire. I sometimes watch (the rest of) the mor-PHINE episode, but I don't even bother with the other two.

Edited by kickedinthehead
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I believe the rats crawling around in the grain is the disturbing image I remember from childhood. The people of Walnut Grove are so stupid that they didn't notice rats in the bags of grain when they bought them! 

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After feeling lost and aimless after the closure of the TWoP site, I've finally managed to drift over and find my way here. I actually didn't know there was even a Little House topic on TWoP, and am sorry I missed out - it must have been a gold mine of hilarity! I've certainly enjoyed coming here & reading this thread.

 

I was a frequent watcher of Little House as a kid, and marvel at the way it's always been categorized as wholesome syrupy family entertainment. On the contrary, it was one of the most twisted, effed up traumatic TV shows ever broadcast. As a kid I didn't view it that way, but I sure do now! As many people have already mentioned upthread, certain episodes were burned into my 70's childhood brain:

 

  • Naturally, the namesake of this thread - poor Sylvia- raped and impregnated by a scary CLOWN guy. A CLOWN.
  • The blind school fire/newborn baby battering ram (No, it wasn't dramatic enough to show a woman trying to escape through a window, she had bash it open with a newborn baby!)
  • Ma coming this close to amputating her own leg
  • "Suddenly Junkie" Albert going through withdrawal & barfing up cream of wheat or whatever it was  (that really scarred me for some reason - WHY oh why did they show that  on camera?)

 

Countless other disturbing episodes. So glad there are other people out there who remember this stuff and can write about it so hilariously. My God, I feel like I HAVE FOUND MY PEOPLE!

 

As an added aside, I also heartily recommend Alison Arngrim's book "Confessions of a Prairie Bitch". It's very well written - and gives a great glimpse of what working in the TV biz during the 70's was like. She is very sharp and funny, and her story runs counter to most other child actors who went off the rails as a result of being on television. Working in the business probably saved her life and sanity, as it got her out of the clutches of an older brother who was abusing her. A great read - it can be purchased on ibooks if you're looking for something to read on your tablet or phone.

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In the first few seasons LHOP was exclusively syrupy family drama. There were even episodes entirely about the kids! One season finale was about a school election! I'm going through season four and I haven't found anything dark or twisted yet. The darkest one so far is when the kids thought Mr. Olsen had murdered Mrs. Olsen but everyone knows he's a ticking time bomb.

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I loved this show and watched it obsessively as a kid, and I could handle all of the dark stuff except for Albert barfing drugs.  That scarred me for life! I remember running out of the room in the middle of the scene because I just couldn't take it, and in the 30+ years since that day I have never watched that part of the episode again.  Every other movie/TV show that scared me as a kid I have been able to watch...guy ripping his face off in Poltergeist? no problem. Android being ripped apart and gushing milky stuff in Aliens? Love that movie.  Girl getting a horrible medical procedure in The Exorcist? Seems interesting now. But the one and only time I tried to watch the Albert on drups episode as an adult, when it got to the scene where he's thrashing around on the bed I broke out in a cold sweat, my heart started pounding and I couldn't change the channel fast enough.  Thanks Michael Landon!

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I loved this show and watched it obsessively as a kid, and I could handle all of the dark stuff except for Albert barfing drugs.  That scarred me for life!

 

For some reason that stuck with me for years and years. Now you see people barfing all the time on television (Dwight Schrute after his car accident is my favorite).

 

I think the other disturbing thing I remember was the rats crawling around in the grain in "Plague". I watched it again and I thought they looked kind of cute. By the way don't buy bags of grain that have stuff moving around in them. 

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Yeah, I don't know what it was that was so disturbing about Albert barfing - I happily watched heads exploding in "Raiders of The Lost Ark", and that chest-burster scene in "Alien"? no problem! As an adult I did wince at all the barfing scenes in "Breaking Bad" (I'm phobic about barfing in general), but none have scarred and messed me up as much as "Little House On the Prarie" for some reason.

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If I remember the episode correctly (unlikely), we're led to believe that Albert has successfully beat his opium addiction and everything's OK. That's when we were treated with the sudden barfing which made it even more unexpected. And my thirty year old recollection (which of course may not be accurate) is that it was multiple explosions of vomit and heaving. 

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Not to be picky, but Albert was actually addicted to MorPHINE. 

 

As a child, I had no idea what had happened to Sylvia; I was a sheltered child and my parents just told me I'd understand when I was older. I did know she was pregnant, but that was only because Sylvia was "with child", and I knew that phrase from the Christmas story in the Bible.

 

My traumatic episode: "Gambini the Great". No other words necessary.

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So much trauma on the prairie but I think the fire at the mline school was the worst for me.  Seeing Alice Garvey burned alive and battering the window with Mary's baby.  Ugh.

 

Yet another reason to want to bitch slap Albert.

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I know Batman! That kills me. It's not like she was in another part of the house and couldn't get to him. She and Adam were standing over the baby's crib, and when the fire started, got up from the crib and ran outside. It wouldn't have been too hard to pick up the baby and take him with, he's right there!

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Know what I think is really heinous? When Pa wrapped the charred remains of the baby and placed it in Mary's arms.

Egads! You're right! Still, it was a bit off that Albert fessing to her while that music box played was all it took to 'snap' Mary out of her severe delusional melancholia.

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Sometimes I blame Albert for starting the barfing on TV trend. Now people do it all the time and it's really not necessary! (Not to mention reality tv where people are sometimes doing it for real--yuck).

I have so much respect for the darkness of this show because even apart from the plague rats, grieving mothers locking Laura in their cellar and Pa's openly letting his daughters know that he values boys more than girls, I'm a big horror movie fan and this show gave me one of the biggest scares ever. It's in that Halloween ep where Laura thinks Mrs. Oleson's been beheaded. She has one dream where Nels serves her head on a plate and Nels looks SO SO SCARY! I watched the ep again once as an adult expecting to laugh at make-up effects that scared me as a kid and NOPE HE STILL LOOKS TERRIFYING!

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(edited)
1 hour ago, sistermagpie said:

It's in that Halloween ep where Laura thinks Mrs. Oleson's been beheaded. She has one dream where Nels serves her head on a plate and Nels looks SO SO SCARY! I watched the ep again once as an adult expecting to laugh at make-up effects that scared me as a kid and NOPE HE STILL LOOKS TERRIFYING!

OMG, that scared TF out of me!!! I still remember when she opens her eyes and screams!!

I'm so glad I found this thread. I watched this show after school for years when it was shown in the NYC area at 5:00. So many disturbing episodes. I tell everyone this is the most f-ed up show ever, but only people who watched it know that. 

Edited by Superclam
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Michael Landon's obsession with fire always amused me because of the (now debunked, I think?) triad of homicidal tendencies (bedwetting past a certain age, setting fires, and being cruel to animals). Perhaps society is lucky that ML turned his tendencies to creating schmaltzy TV. 

I can't believe it's Labor Day, people are home, and Thylvia comes up in the rotation! 

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On ‎7‎/‎25‎/‎2014 at 3:30 PM, mansonlamps said:

Out of curiosity why are we using "mline" for "blind?"

Mline? I'm going...mline? Bwahahahah. I'm gonna burn in hell because I'd never wish anybody to go blind but Mary going mline was something to behold. I will say this, that terrible shriek she unleashed when the world went dark and Pa sprinted up to the loft still gives me chills.

 

 

On ‎8‎/‎25‎/‎2014 at 0:56 PM, Ubiquitous said:

How about the time Charles came home (with his father?) but failed to tell Caroline his mother's body was in a box in the back in time?

They just opened up the door of that train, "Yep, there's your Maw, in a box." How awful was that?

 

On ‎8‎/‎25‎/‎2014 at 5:13 PM, juneday said:

Ugh yes, The Godsister was awful. I've only seen it once and I don't plan to watch it again. If they wanted to try to give the Greenbush sisters a chance to show their "acting skills", that wasn't the script to do so.

ALYSSA!!! ALYSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! I cant remember much of this episode other than that being shrieked and that ginormous strawberry. I've never caught it in a repeat.

 

 

On ‎2‎/‎21‎/‎2015 at 2:33 PM, sgittinger said:

Not to be picky, but Albert was actually addicted to MorPHINE. 

Yes...the MorPHINE.

 

I was back on TWoP back when and the LHotP thread was simply a treasure trove of amazing snark. Many a lunch at work was spent choking with on my food laughing at it. I have to say Kim Reed is doing a great job on the LHotP podcasts. She's got a great snark factor going.

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Months ago, apparently while watching Twin Peaks: The Return, I was grossed out by the vomiting scene and was talking about it on Twitter. I Tweeted that I blamed Albert Ingalls for starting the vomiting trend on TV (because I swear that was the first time I saw actual vomit on TV).

Today I got a like on my Tweet...from Matthew Laborteaux. LOL

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On ‎9‎/‎6‎/‎2017 at 1:54 PM, Lady Iris said:

I was back on TWoP back when and the LHotP thread was simply a treasure trove of amazing snark. Many a lunch at work was spent choking with on my food laughing at it. I have to say Kim Reed is doing a great job on the LHotP podcasts. She's got a great snark factor going.

Ah, so THAT'S why the name looked familiar!

 

On ‎7‎/‎10‎/‎2018 at 11:14 PM, Runningwild said:

What kills me is my mom wouldn’t let me watch Emergency! because one of the tertiary firefighters died once but she had no problem letting me watch this sick crap. 

My parents made us watch this instead of Wonder Woman, but I will always remember a scene from the "Real People" ep of WKRP with Lucille describing Mary going blind and the school buring down and telling the cameraman what a wholesome show it is!

 

On ‎7‎/‎11‎/‎2018 at 6:20 PM, Maherjunkie said:

I haven't seen Alyssa since I was a kid-is it not in rotation?

If memory serves, it's a LHotP movie (or an extra-long one), so it's not in the regular rotation.

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On 7/27/2017 at 7:12 AM, Emkat said:

How about the litter of puppies being drowned in a bag in the creek?!

Oh man that was terrible. I remember crying at that one.

The episode where Jenny almost drowns and she is helped by the doctor going blind. Mind you, a doctor we have never seen before. 

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