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OnceSane

S07.E08: Clash the Persians

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The Shahs take Las Vegas by storm for MJ's last trip as a single woman; GG's progress with Shalom regresses; Mike's relationship with Morgan takes a hit, sending him into a spiral that tests more than one of his relationships within the crew.

Airs September 27, 2018.

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Oh this has to be recorded. Mike's 'words of wisdom' to Golnesa about Shalom, who is stalking and harrassing her about the ring (valued at 165k in an earlier episode). Golnesa says she's had to block Shalom on social media because he's harrassing her. She describes this and 'back to back' texts. Rabbi Mike mansplains that he went through EXACTLY this with Jessica. He blocked Jessica on SM because she'd blocked him (because in Rabbi Mike's book, this is the mature thing to do). Golnesa then explains she had to block Shalom because of harrassment. Mike then continues to mansplain  to Gigi that what she is ACTUALLY FEELING, IS NOT WHAT SHE HAS JUST TOLD HIM SHE IS FEELING ie. that what she sees as 'harrassment' is  actually just his deep rooted LOVE for her and what she's doing WITH HIS ring. Gigi is just too dumb and female (my little sister crap) to understand. This. Guy. That ring was an engagement ring. If you give one, you don't expect it back. They got married as well, so even more so. Mike's description of it as 'his ring' illuminates just what this trogolodyte is: an unreconstructured misogynist and a massive hypocrite. 

And this little exchange was preceded by Mike ordering Mona to stop packing! Get a drink! Now! You're being timed! It really didn't come across as that light hearted. He's a really controlling creep. Mona looked like a scared rabbit. She stopped moving like you do when you're not sure if someone is joking or not, and 'not' is scary. 

Mike is out of control. He is also an easy read. The way he told Reza that he'd split up with Morgan by first making a comment about how many girls had 'hit him up' since getting to Vegas. Then he pulls back and says 'I ignored them all'. Then he creeps a little further toward the truth 'even though I'm single'. Still Reza isn't paying him attention. So Mike adds in Farsi that 'she got angry and left'. Finally Reza wakes up and says 'who?' and Mike, great souled human with only the comfort of others on his mind, responds 'Morgan, but I don't want them (his friends) to know right now). As usual, this is all bullshit. She may have 'got angry' and left, but only after Mike banned her from coming to Vegas. I just cannot with his bs selfsacrificing 'i'm only protecting my parents' schtick. Mike should be keeping the lessons of TRav and Michael Darby at the forefront of his lizard brain, because something like this is coming for Mike. He hates women. 

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Let's turn it up! Let's get turnt! How old are these idiots? 

No, MJ, you don't talk about cheating on your about to be husband if he isn't doing you 6 times a day. Even if it was a joke, it wasn't funny. I see she's back to getting shitfaced again. She's almost 50. It's just not a good look and we have seen it all before with her. 

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Holy smokes, Shervin in so hairy!  He could at least have the hair waxed off his back.  I think it’s sweet that he always looks out for GG and I use to think he was really handsome but this season not as much.  In my opinion both Mike and Shervin are way to stocky and would look much better lean.

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1 hour ago, Emmeline said:

Holy smokes, Shervin in so hairy!  He could at least have the hair waxed off his back.  I think it’s sweet that he always looks out for GG and I use to think he was really handsome but this season not as much.  In my opinion both Mike and Shervin are way to stocky and would look much better lean.

Right?? I used to think Shervin was so handsome, now they both look so bloated and sweaty! 

13 hours ago, queenjen said:

Not introducing Morgan to his parents because 'she's not Jewish", is bullshit.

Here's a little tip for Mike: If not being Jewish is a deal breaker, then don't date women who aren't Jewish!! Does this moron look to sabotage himself or maybe deep down he doesn't really want to settle down with anybody so he intentionally looks for relationships he knows won't be mommy approved. 

Edited by bichonblitz
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2 hours ago, bichonblitz said:

I see she's back to getting shitfaced again. She's almost 50. It's just not a good look and we have seen it all before with her. 

It was her bachelorette party, I see nothing wrong with getting fucked up.  And I was glad to see her leave instead of making a big scene about the single guys of the group spending their time hitting on chicks.

Mike doesn't want to put in the effort of finding someone, so he hasn't.  If a Persian Jewish woman who doesn't care about being cheated on fell in his lap tomorrow, he'd be married by spring.  He just doesn't want to have to work for anything, especially a woman.  And he can't understand why his brothers have had better success despite Mike being "the hot one" (debatable).

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Just now, bichonblitz said:

Here's a little tip for Mike: If not being Jewish is a deal breaker, then don't date women who aren't Jewish!! Does this moron look to sabotage himself or maybe deep down he doesn't really want to settle down with anybody so he intentionally looks for relationships he knows won't be mommy approved. 

Of course his mother can't watch the show and see that he's dating a non-Jewish woman.  I think this is all Mike's passive-aggressive way of getting back at his parents for somehow being responsible for his failures.  In Mike World everything's somebody else's fault.  His marriage didn't fail because he stuck his dick into everything that wasn't nailed down, it failed because Jessica didn't start out Jewish, so it was inevitable that the marriage couldn't last.  Jessica was a little nuts ("I'm a wife!  I'm a wife!"), but she did everything this loser asked of her, and she still wasn't good enough for the Golden Dool.  Which rhymes with Tool, and that about says it for Mike.

Just now, OnceSane said:

And he can't understand why his brothers have had better success despite Mike being "the hot one" (debatable).

Being the hot one in that crew is like being the tallest Munchkin in Oz.  The bar is set pretty low.

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I don't think Mike really wants to get married.  But he's afraid of verbalizing that to his family because he know that is what's expected of him.  

13 hours ago, queenjen said:

He will end up angry and alone.

Basically everybody ends up alone, but you shouldn't be angry.  I agree with the poster who said Michael is like TRav in that he hates women.  

Jessica, at first, I think tried to keep Mike away from the others because she thought THEY were a bad influence on him.  Then she realized that Mike doesn't need anybody to be a bad influence, he can do that all by himself.

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I can’t help it; I still find Nema really really cute. But he was losing me with the ONLY ONE GUY FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE stuff. I mean, why bother getting married or having a serious relationship if you find monogamy that repulsive. 

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1 hour ago, OnceSane said:

It was her bachelorette party, I see nothing wrong with getting fucked up.  And I was glad to see her leave instead of making a big scene about the single guys of the group spending their time hitting on chicks.

Mike doesn't want to put in the effort of finding someone, so he hasn't.  If a Persian Jewish woman who doesn't care about being cheated on fell in his lap tomorrow, he'd be married by spring.  He just doesn't want to have to work for anything, especially a woman.  And he can't understand why his brothers have had better success despite Mike being "the hot one" (debatable).

I think Mike will get married at some point - to a woman mom has picked out. I think mom holds the purse strings and supplements Mike's lifestyle. He will marry someone Jewish and Persian and he will give mom the grand kids she wants and he will continually cheat on the wife.

I wonder if his deadline is "45"

I also think Mike picked a fight with Morgan because he didn't want her in Vegas. He knows that if she's thirsty enough to be on TV, she'll take him back when they are back in California.

MJ was pretty well behaved on her night at Tao's.

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Mike's immaturity hit another low when he tried to slut-shame MJ by saying she'd slept with "Half the city" because he called him out on the truth -- that he cheated. MJ can have all the consensual sex in the world because none of that even remotely compares to ruining a relationship with infidelity. And the fact that he even admitted that he slut-shamed her because he was upset that he was called a cheater, which he is, is just so fucking childish. Good luck to any woman who decides to put up with him, even if I'm silently asking why.

I did like that MJ was like, Oh yeah? "I had the whole city." Watch me put on this [insert product placement of my own brand] while I own my sexuality, jackass. Still not a cheater, though! MJ gets to go home to someone who's completely nuts about her and Mike could have had the same thing, if only he kept his dick in his pants. And respected women. And weren't a manchild. But, I digress. 

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It REALLY looked like Nema was talking to Stassi Schroeder in the club after MJ left. The cameras would get close, but then someone would block her face. Is Stassi with someone at the moment? Because Nema was asking her (Stassi, or lookalike) if the guy she was with at the moment was her 'soulmate'. 

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I don’t really find Nema (it autocorrected to anemia, hee) attractive. There was a closeup of him on his laptop and his skin looked bad. He has a nice smile, though.

Destiney is cute with her constant dancing.

I can’t see Reza, or MJ for that matter, having children. Giving up this lifestyle would not be easy. 

It is fun watching this group—they’re so demonstrative, and, all the food! *drool*

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5 hours ago, queenjen said:

It REALLY looked like Nema was talking to Stassi Schroeder in the club after MJ left.

I'm 90% sure that wasn't Stassi.

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34 minutes ago, OnceSane said:

I'm 90% sure that wasn't Stassi.

Not least because no wat she would allow her face to be blocked from the camera.

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You guys have probably saved me from going back and looking again. I agree @biakbiak, Stassi is a all about the cameras, so that was the thing that made me wonder too. But I also found it interesting that the 3 or so times they panned from Mike and Shervin, then back over to Nema, we'd see blonde hair and part of her face and what he was saying, and then someone's body would block the rest of her face. I was wondering if she might be there on the DL. Unlikely. I know. I probably haven't watched enough of the Stassi years of VPR to get a true feel. Also, we didn't see what Golnesa was up to once MJ retired with her gayntourage, or whatever version of 'my gays' is being propagated on Bravo at this moment. blech. 

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Well, Jax and GG have "known each other Biblically," so if the VPR gang had indeed met up with them, I wouldn't have been surprised... but I agree that that didn't really look like Stassi (and would have made it all about herself if it were).

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On 9/28/2018 at 11:25 AM, Emmeline said:

Holy smokes, Shervin in so hairy!  He could at least have the hair waxed off his back.  I think it’s sweet that he always looks out for GG and I use to think he was really handsome but this season not as much.  In my opinion both Mike and Shervin are way to stocky and would look much better lean.

Mike has always looked like King Koopa to me. I guess Shervin is the (larger) cartoon version versus Mike's video game one.

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I've been binging this season over the past 48 hours. I have been in bed with the flu whilst the season plays over and over...

I want to say that my favourite moment of all 7 seasons was when MJ pulls out her lippy and lays down a deadpan, perfect product placement.

In fact, it played out in several fever dreams and every single time I was living for it.

Don't slutshame a woman when you've had a "bachelor pad" broseph. In fact, just STFU guy. Women aren't about what men think or expect and I find Mike repulsive. It is a wonder why nothing, and I do mean nothing at all, except for being on this show, seems to have worked out for him.

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On 9/29/2018 at 12:48 AM, ivygirl said:

Well, Jax and GG have "known each other Biblically," so if the VPR gang had indeed met up with them, I wouldn't have been surprised... but I agree that that didn't really look like Stassi (and would have made it all about herself if it were).

GET OUT!!  Before they were Bravolebrities?  

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Ok, did we hear Reza call Mike a blanking jew? I thought i heard that, gasped but didn't rewind. Then Mike said something like "your half jew?" How could they not cut that out? 

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On 10/13/2018 at 8:43 AM, hatchetgirl said:

Ok, did we hear Reza call Mike a blanking jew? I thought i heard that, gasped but didn't rewind. Then Mike said something like "your half jew?" How could they not cut that out? 

I think Reza is considering himself more than half Jewish or maybe even all Jewish.  I think that only because Adam just converted. 

Does anyone know for sure??

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But he used it in a derogatory fashion which caused mike to reply "but your half jew." It was definitely said in anger and in spite as if he was spitting it out. 

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