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S05.E09: Week 5: Part 2

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13 hours ago, JudyObscure said:

Maybe she isn't held by men that much or it was just Joe's gigantic teeth, but she was frightened and the sobbing went on way too long for my comfort. 

My immediate thought was that she wasn't used to being held by men that much (I like Joe's smile and his teeth).  Then she immediately got quiet when Kendall took her.  

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I just finished watching the whole episode and... Oof Shushanna pull yourself together omg. I don't even want to harp on her too much because it feels wrong, she seems a bit disturbed and not all there.

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1 hour ago, seacliffsal said:

I think that the fastest way to take the fun out of paradise is to add two babies/toddlers into the mix.  I know that the producers are selling a "you can find your happily ever after..."  but, really, bringing the babies in?  Maybe if they were still considering Joe for the Bachelor it would have been an attempt to have an adorable segment in his audition reel, but as it was, I think the others would just find it annoying.  I know I didn't want to particularly watch the married couples come back, but maybe it's because I'm just grouchy or something.

Ugh and now they will be adding Jared and Ashley to the couples they bring back every time to show how they found true love. Maybe I'm grouchy too :)

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22 minutes ago, enthropyhater said:

I just finished watching the whole episode and... Oof Shushanna pull yourself together omg. I don't even want to harp on her too much because it feels wrong, she seems a bit disturbed and not all there.

Actually I think she's trying to copy Ashley I, but without a specific guy in mind.

I cannot imagine Colton on the Bachelor. How do you even have a conversation with him?

You: So, what's your favorite ice cream flavor?

Him: look of confusion.

Half an hour later: Strawberry.

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5 minutes ago, mertensia said:

Actually I think she's trying to copy Ashley I, but without a specific guy in mind.

I cannot imagine Colton on the Bachelor. How do you even have a conversation with him?

You: So, what's your favorite ice cream flavor?

Him: look of confusion.

Half an hour later: Strawberry.

Nah, he's as vanilla as it gets.

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On 9/5/2018 at 12:59 AM, Andromeda said:

I loved the synchronized swimming. Now that's what having fun in paradise is all about.

Why can't TPTB understand that we want more this, and less drraaammmaaaa of seeing a few couples monopolize screen time [cough Coltia cough]

Also, two random observations:

  • There was a shot of Krystal with her hair parted in the middle and it looked awful.
  • Annaliese said "Kamil and I are literally the same person"....I just can't.
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So, like, what if you get a contestant who absolutely does not want children? I want just about nothing to do with babies or small children, and I'm just imagining looks of shock and horror if someone were to say, "Yeah... babysitting and babies in general just sound like a nightmare to me, no thanks." Not everyone's fairy tale or life plan involve children, but hey, I don't think the producers have even considered the possibility that some are turned off by kids. The contestants always talk about having babies as if it's a foregone conclusion. What if they connect with someone who is like, nah, I don't want any?

I did love Jordan's disgust at Jenna's choices of baby names. "Tucker?!" And his declaration that their babies would come out cute, giggling, and ready to be weird.

Shushanna had no interest whatsoever in NZ Jordan until Olivia sat her down and took two seconds to convince her. Shu was basically all, "Really? You can picture me with Jordan?" Olivia goes, "Yeah totally, you guys looked really cute and natural the other night." And Shu is immediately all, "Yeah we did, didn't we! You're right! I'm over Kamil."

The witch thing was as blown out of proportion as the scallops thing last season. It sounded like Kamil was making an offhand joke (although it's hard to tell if he is capable of joking), and it was Annaleise who decided to go to Shu and tell her Kamil legitimately thought she was practicing witchcraft. Shut up, Annaleise. She's so smug now that she's part of a 3 day old "solid couple".

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14 minutes ago, jade.black said:

The witch thing was as blown out of proportion as the scallops thing last season. It sounded like Kamil was making an offhand joke (although it's hard to tell if he is capable of joking), and it was Annaleise who decided to go to Shu and tell her Kamil legitimately thought she was practicing witchcraft. Shut up, Annaleise. She's so smug now that she's part of a 3 day old "solid couple".

There is nothing worse than a smug person on this show that is part of a "couple".  And man Annaleise has it bad.  Like Carly in season 2 bad when was bragging all over the beach about her and Kirk not knowing that he was plotting his escape back to Wisconsin without her.    Boy that was a great moment in reality tv show history!

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Did I really watch a whole last hour that focused on Shushanna, Kamil and Annaleise? Z-list of the Bachelor Nation? Time to wrap it up, peeps, this season was an utter fail.

I'm thinking that the producers told Eric, Colton, Venmo and Kevin that the role of the Bachelor was up for grabs and "you never know what'll happen" hence all these guys are aiming at leaving paradise unattached. They should never have used BIP as a testing ground for the Bachelor because all you get are a bunch of dudes trying to hang on as long as they can, but at the same time, confused! and play to the cameras in the hope of garnering sympathy and getting the big gig.  Jordan and Chris probably figured that BIP was all that they had left so they went for the relationships instead.  

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On 9/5/2018 at 2:46 AM, mertensia said:

Dear ABC,

I don't care that John died and his friends are all whiny. Why do you think I want to watch that? Bring back Agent Carter. Or Galavant. Or Deception instead.

a viewer

It will be a weak-tea remake of “The Big Chill”.  Not bothering with it.  The movie was two hours.  How does one make a whole season out of a very limited storyline.  Didn’t they already try this with the housewives show a few years ago?  Was great for maybe a season.....

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Oh good, they brought back Carly to judge other people’s relationships to see if they are as good as hers. That’s what’s been missing from this season. 

I can’t defend Eric anymore. I don’t understand him. The hottest girl on the beach (who he chose and sent home Angela for) is begging him to make out with him, and he tries to talk her out of it?

Kamil acts like he’s being held hostage by Annieliese. She talks about how strong their connection is, but all we see is him laying there like a log as she mounts him. Her confidence definitely comes from sleeping with Kamil. 

I can completely believe Johnn killed himself. I’ve only seen his friends in a 30 sec ad and I want to kill myself (granted, I’ve now seen those 30 seconds approximately 297 times). 

I don’t understand Chris and Krystal together, at all. She’s waaaay out of his league. And he’s a creep. Hopefully she’s just doing this for TV. 

If I had to guess, the happiest moment for Kamil in Paradise was probably when Annaliese and Shu confronted each other because finally he was left alone. 

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21 minutes ago, Stan39 said:

I can completely believe Johnn killed himself. I’ve only seen his friends in a 30 sec ad and I want to kill myself (granted, I’ve now seen those 30 seconds approximately 297 times). 

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA Maybe they keep showing it to make Paradise look better? I mean, if I have to choose between that show and this one, I'm staying in Paradise. At least these people are more fun to laugh at.

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On 9/4/2018 at 7:38 PM, ImaTart said:

Had to mute the crying babies. Ugh!

I just started watching this show.   I think I've seen 3 niights worth, being this is the 3rd time watcing it.  

It"s personal drama based, false tears, half dressed people galore.  A few people have personality disorders of course.

It entertaing because it's stupidly predictable. I has a soap opera vibe .... so it' a time filler while having dinner. ??

I muted them too.  I'm on a short fuse this week.

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On 9/5/2018 at 12:57 PM, tennisgurl said:

I guess the producers love his white bread football playing small town "wholesomeness", but I dont see that translating to a very interesting season. And we could have had Jason... 

I totally agree. Colton is so, so boring. I saw his bit on Jimmy Kimmel's show (he was giving Colton a sex-ed class) and Colton was bland and unimaginative and essentially humorless. He barely played for an NFL team -- he was on a practice squad and at training camp, but was always cut before he played in any real games. That is NOT a successful football player.

So white bread, too. I get the idea the producers think this is the kind of contestant "middle America" loves. Maybe they do, but I don't.

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I was just hoping they'd get somebody totally new.  I don't get the appeal of any of the potential suitors, especially Jason and Blake.  Frankly, I'm surprised Becca ended up with anybody.  She had painfully slim pickings.  

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1 hour ago, Mswldflwr said:

 Frankly, I'm surprised Becca ended up with anybody.  She had painfully slim pickings.  

I hope that kind of 'amazing' casting continues on for Colton. I'd love to pack the house with BSC high-maintenance types that all mess with his head the whole season so he can be as confused as possible. I hopoe the trend is "None of these women are into you, they just see Instagram dollars in their heads." Bring ON the famewhores!

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"I can completely believe Johnn killed himself. I’ve only seen his friends in a 30 sec ad and I want to kill myself (granted, I’ve now seen those 30 seconds approximately 297 times)"

⬆️⬆️⬆️.......➡️???

Edited by ImaTart
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2 hours ago, Wandering Snark said:

I hope that kind of 'amazing' casting continues on for Colton. I'd love to pack the house with BSC high-maintenance types that all mess with his head the whole season so he can be as confused as possible. I hopoe the trend is "None of these women are into you, they just see Instagram dollars in their heads." Bring ON the famewhores!

Now I could get behind watching this kind of season. Bring back Corinne, Kelsey Poe, Scallop Fingers and Stage 5 Clinger Annaliese (if she's available, which I'm assuming she will be.)

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The contestants or cast or whatever you call them are getting progressively less attractive with each successive season. The new additions in the past few weeks have been pretty good: angela, cassandra and shushanna are all good looking women. However, the original cast was pretty weak: as weak as I've ever seen in any season of bachelor or BIP.

 

I remember watching a few minutes of the opening episode of the premier season. The bachelor was in a tux, and the women looked gorgeous in evening gowns. Now it seems as if the franchise is scraping from the bottom of the barrel. Most of the women are at least 26, several are at least 30. A significant percentage of the women have children. 

 

The low pay (or lack thereof), the extremely negative spin some of the contestants receive, and the total lack of any tangible benefits that anyone would consider worthwhile means the franchise can only attract the trashiest and most desperate for attention. This is a dream franchise for ABC/Disney: they pay the contestants/actors nothing, and they make tens or even hundreds of millions in advertising revenue. 

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The baby cried long enough to make me uncomfortable.   If I were Kendall, I would have taken the crying baby and given Joe the calmer one, no matter what the producers were telling me to do.   But Kendall was still probably formulating what the perfect comeback to Leo would have been in her head.    

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11 hours ago, kelvins said:

The contestants or cast or whatever you call them are getting progressively less attractive with each successive season. The new additions in the past few weeks have been pretty good: angela, cassandra and shushanna are all good looking women. However, the original cast was pretty weak: as weak as I've ever seen in any season of bachelor or BIP.

 

I remember watching a few minutes of the opening episode of the premier season. The bachelor was in a tux, and the women looked gorgeous in evening gowns. Now it seems as if the franchise is scraping from the bottom of the barrel. Most of the women are at least 26, several are at least 30. A significant percentage of the women have children. 

 

The low pay (or lack thereof), the extremely negative spin some of the contestants receive, and the total lack of any tangible benefits that anyone would consider worthwhile means the franchise can only attract the trashiest and most desperate for attention. This is a dream franchise for ABC/Disney: they pay the contestants/actors nothing, and they make tens or even hundreds of millions in advertising revenue. 

I’m puzzled why being 26-30 is a negative or scraping the bottom of the barrel.

The payoff is on social media.  I’m pretty sure some of the more prominently featured cast got decent pay.

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The franchise can't attract the most beautiful women. Those women are already taken. It attracts women who are a little bit over the hill, and/or women who can't quite get a foot in the door into the entertainment industry. The show is also attracting a lot of single moms now as well. It's becoming so commonplace no one even mentions it or brings it up.

 

Angela Amezcua is an example of several of the above. She's a single mom, late 20's, and still signed to a modeling agency, even though the top models begin their careers in their teens. She's a beautiful woman, I'm glad she was on the show, but she's a career first girl, trying to enter several professions at 29 when those industry's 'stars' are groomed starting as children. Not exactly the traits you're looking for when searching for a wifey.

 

The franchise simply can't attract young, beautiful single women who aren't divorced or who don't have kids. The reasons why are simple: the show doesn't even pay it's contestants/actors! Second, they often portray them in a humiliating fashion, or in a less than sympathetic light. If Juan Pablo's claims are accurate, the show's producers are even forcing it's 'actors'/contestants to take part in softcore porn (such as the 'nude' 'sex scene' on the beach). 

 

Honestly, no man will prefer a 30 year old woman who's been divorced and is raising a child on her own vs. a 20 year old woman who's never had a child and never been married. These women simply have too many miles on the odometer: they're burned out, cynical, and are clinging to their last and best shot at stardom. Everyone on the show knows that they have a zero percent chance of becoming a steadily working (and paid) actor or model, but maybe they can schmaltz it up enough on screen to earn a return gig as bachelor or bachelorette or as a contestant on dancing with the stars. Before they return to whatever it is that they were doing before (social media influencer, software salesperson, hairdresser, etc.). Being on tv sure beats whatever it is they're on vacation from, I suppose.


As far as the men, they're looking for a quick jump in the sack from a pre-selected group of hot women (hotter than what they'd find in an online dating site or at the local watering hole, that's for sure). 

 

I've gotten addicted to the hot women but if they keep casting older, less attractive women where's the buy-in?

Edited by kelvins

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I'm pretty sure this franchise was appealing to the male demographic at some point. There have been some very hot women passing through in various earlier seasons. But in the last 2-3 years, there's been a big dropoff. Male viewership has to be dropping, no? Not that ratings matter that much: the other reality shows abc competes are equally dreadful so there's not much of a choice for viewers. That means that advertising rates are still sky high since there are only 4 networks that monopolize all OTA broadcast time. 

 

So in the end it really doesn't matter. ABC doesn't HAVE to attract the prettiest women. All they have to do is cast women who are passably attractive just enough so that the premise that these women are desirable doesn't become totally laughable. But the show is on the brink. Annaliese for example. She's 33, so she says. But she looks like she should be at a point in her life where she's happily married, with a couple of kids. She doesn't look the part she's playing: immature, clingy single girl ensnared in boring catfights with other 30 something immature clingy single girls. It's not very plausible. 

 

How much cognitive dissonance is necessary before everyone, even the most loyal of viewers, becomes so disgusted that tv viewership becomes a non starter? ABC is on the cusp, yes?

Edited by kelvins
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54 minutes ago, kelvins said:

Angela Amezcua is an example of several of the above. She's a single mom, late 20's, and still signed to a modeling agency, even though the top models begin their careers in their teens. She's a beautiful woman, I'm glad she was on the show, but she's a career first girl, trying to enter several professions at 29 when those industry's 'stars' are groomed starting as children. Not exactly the traits you're looking for when searching for a wifey.

 

Angela doesn't have a kid.   Chelsea and Cassandra were the moms on the show this season.  

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1 hour ago, kelvins said:

Honestly, no man will prefer a 30 year old woman who's been divorced and is raising a child on her own vs. a 20 year old woman who's never had a child and never been married. These women simply have too many miles on the odometer: they're burned out, cynical, and are clinging to their last and best shot at stardom. Everyone on the show knows that they have a zero percent chance of becoming a steadily working (and paid) actor or model, but maybe they can schmaltz it up enough on screen to earn a return gig as bachelor or bachelorette or as a contestant on dancing with the stars. Before they return to whatever it is that they were doing before (social media influencer, software salesperson, hairdresser, etc.). Being on tv sure beats whatever it is they're on vacation from, I suppose.

The strength of this statement is in inverse proportion to the age of the man.  The older a man gets, the more his ears bleed at the incessant use of the word "like" and at the mere mention of the Kardashians.

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I'm kinda late to the party but I really hope that Joe and Kendall only watched those babies for maybe five minutes and then someone Emmy knew took over. Otherwise I'm sorry but jade and tanner and really worthless parents if thru could listen to that poor child scream in absolute terror as Joe took her and she had to watch her mama walk away. There were all these strangers surrounded her and she was scared. It would break my heart ify own child screamed like that. There's no way I could walk away and enjoy a relaxing day knowing my baby was scared. I hope it was just a set up and jade and or tanner were still in sight and keeping an eye on things. I would be livid if I were Joe and Kendall. That was a stupid date.  Chelsea is a bitch. I no longer like her. Her sly desperate move didn't earn her a rose so she fakes a panic attack so she can extend her ten mins of camera time. So pathetic!  Eric is dead to me as well. He left crying because he knew he wasn't getting a rose when it's the women's turn. So he left like the little punk he is. 

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Two things

First- ANGELA FOUND LOVE! With someone from Becca’s season! Check out her Instagram :D

Second- Kamil is hot and Annalise is not. And worse on she’s so sad and desperate. And she has dents on both sides of her face does anyone know what happened there?

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I'll admit it: I'm surprised Ashley snagged Jared. I thought it would never happen. He didn't seem into her beyond friendship. I guess persistence pays off? Did she just wear the guy down? I know I should be happy for them, but I find her so irritating and now a little... smug. Quite distasteful to go through the engagement theatrics in front of her ex too. I have no interest in watching their wedding (assuming it will be televised). 

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On 9/6/2018 at 2:17 PM, Stan39 said:

I can completely believe Johnn killed himself. I’ve only seen his friends in a 30 sec ad and I want to kill myself (granted, I’ve now seen those 30 seconds approximately 297 times). 

I know this has already been quoted at least twice, but I couldn’t resist.  Freakin’ hilarious!

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On 9/6/2018 at 11:31 AM, CindyBee said:

There is nothing worse than a smug person on this show that is part of a "couple".  And man Annaleise has it bad.  Like Carly in season 2 bad when was bragging all over the beach about her and Kirk not knowing that he was plotting his escape back to Wisconsin without her.    Boy that was a great moment in reality tv show history!

I feel guilty for saying this, but I kind of want Annaliese to get dumped just to take her down a few notches. I thought the same thing about Carly, but Annaliese seems even more desperate to me. How does one go from desperate to smug? Shouldn't there be something in the middle, such as relieved or normal or humble? 

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On 9/7/2018 at 11:33 AM, chocolatine said:

Women over 26, quelle horreur!

Yeah, washed up, dried out old hags. *cough* Moving on, why is there so much emphasis on age anyway? Like someone 25 is okay but 26 is antique and hopeless? So much brainlessness in that thinking. Or lack of thinking.

15 hours ago, Sweet-tea said:

I'll admit it: I'm surprised Ashley snagged Jared. I thought it would never happen. He didn't seem into her beyond friendship. I guess persistence pays off?

Makes me wonder if all that wasn't TPTB scripted drahama. Except Kevin got in there somehow, poor guy.

23 hours ago, JudyObscure said:

Any man who used the word "wifey," would be off my list.

He'd be ON my list. Right at the top of my shit list. (I have more words for anyone who uses that term, but you get the idea.)

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1 minute ago, saber5055 said:

Yeah, washed up, dried out old hags. *cough* Moving on, why is there so much emphasis on age anyway? Like someone 25 is okay but 26 is antique and hopeless? So much brainlessness in that thinking. Or lack of thinking.

Makes me wonder if all that wasn't TPTB scripted drahama. Except Kevin got in there somehow, poor guy.

He'd be ON my list. Right at the top of my shit list. (I have more words for anyone who uses that term, but you get the idea.)

Don’t forget, Beckah was what? 22? And all anyone talked about was how she was too young to date, or breath, or exist or something. But the 23 year olds there were fine. I guess women are only acceptable between the ages of 23-25. Sorry ladies ???

 

Personsally, I don’t see any of these people as desirable. They should bring in older men and women just because you’d probably get more accomplished people on the show. I’m tired of seeing stuff like “chicken enthusiast” listed as someone’s profession. 

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On 9/6/2018 at 11:17 AM, Stan39 said:

Oh good, they brought back Carly to judge other people’s relationships to see if they are as good as hers. That’s what’s been missing from this season. 

Kamil acts like he’s being held hostage by Annieliese. She talks about how strong their connection is, but all we see is him laying there like a log as she mounts him. Her confidence definitely comes from sleeping with Kamil. 

I'm glad I wasn't drinking coffee when I read this, Stan. Otherwise you'd owe me a new laptop.

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20 hours ago, Stan39 said:

Don’t forget, Beckah was what? 22? And all anyone talked about was how she was too young to date, or breath, or exist or something. But the 23 year olds there were fine. I guess women are only acceptable between the ages of 23-25. Sorry ladies ???

 

Personsally, I don’t see any of these people as desirable. They should bring in older men and women just because you’d probably get more accomplished people on the show. I’m tired of seeing stuff like “chicken enthusiast” listed as someone’s profession. 

TBH, I think a show with a bachelor aged 40 and the women all in their 30s would be a nice change of pace. Heck, even Bachelor, Senior Citizen edition might be fun. 

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19 minutes ago, Amy Beth said:

TBH, I think a show with a bachelor aged 40 and the women all in their 30s would be a nice change of pace. Heck, even Bachelor, Senior Citizen edition might be fun. 

I guess the only fear is: people acting crazy in their 20s is funny (hey, we were all there. We all did stupid stuff and overreacted to life). People in their 40s acting crazy is kind of sad and creepy. If a 40-year-old Annaliese shows up on the Bachelor acting like she does now, viewers are going to worry about her and feel bad that she’ll never pull it together. On the flip side, it might also lead to less drama as older people might be more chill about stuff. I can’t see a group of 40-year-old men freaking out about one dude’s picture with Becca. 

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41 minutes ago, Stan39 said:

I guess the only fear is: people acting crazy in their 20s is funny (hey, we were all there. We all did stupid stuff and overreacted to life). People in their 40s acting crazy is kind of sad and creepy.

I'd like to see this show, but with people 30-40 acting like ... well, people 30-40, and there to find a connection, not working to become another D-list celebrity famewhore. Although I guess that wouldn't draw ratings. Seems all anyone wants to see is the manufactured fakety fake drama and setups to create conflict. Most viewers believe the scripts TPTB give these wanna-be actors. The rest of us, I guess, watch so we can snark afterward.

While Annaliese and Shu can be termed crazy, at least they don't have anyone taking legal action against them for harassment. None of the men this season are prizes IMO, and I include Mr. 60/40 in there too. Well, there IS Joe, so of course we barely get to see/hear him.

This is the most boring season. What happened to volleyball on the beach, frisbee, cornhole or diving contests or ANYTHING other than sitting/laying around moping.

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