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S07.E09: Fantasies and Firsts


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On 8/29/2018 at 11:54 AM, crgirl412 said:

I'm almost sure the reason they have sex twice a day is that it's the only way, place and time that they are communicating well!!  I realize that it is the most base (grammar?) of the types of communication that humans have but when it's literally all you have left, it makes complete sense!!  I don't think they realize it yet but I think they will soon.

  

I knew a divorced couple living separately that still got together for sex a few times a week. They worked well in that activity but would argue on the way out. Even doing this show and using this method to marry seems so out of character for the kind of man Dave seems to be (very self assured). Both are trying but it still seems like a bridge too far. She doesn't seem like mother material to me...a woman who said she didn't think being married should entail more work.

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On 8/29/2018 at 9:34 PM, humbleopinion said:

Prediction....

Dave will stay with Amber on Decision Day to make amends for the 7.5 rating...then will file for divorce as soon as possible

Tristan will stay married to Mia because of their religion but will file for divorce as soon as possible because of her continued shadiness.

Both men will go over to Ricky Bobby's house where they will celebrate their freedom, grill up some ducks that their boy shot and play with Henry, Nellie and the latest foster pup...

I think only Bobby and Daniele will agree to stay married. Whatever problems might come up they have so much in their favor.

I'm not sure the other couples will be together by the time they decide but I predict Tristan and Dave will have other plans...maybe its wishful thinking.

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Quote

As I watch this show every season.  I realize the experts don't know what theyr'e doing.  But the thing is, NO experts would know what they're doing.  You can match people up by computer, or asking people questions, or using psychology, or doing anything, doesn't matter; two people can be the same race/religion/same family values/whatever.  Doesn't matter.  The reason I feel it doesn't matter is because no one has a crystal ball, no one can predict the future.  No one knows how a person will react to bad stuff, or even to good stuff. 

I think they should be able to predict well enough that the couples at least have a chance to be successful. This depends on couples being honest, that they are going to give the marriage a hundred percent effort and accept this is a marriage not a trial run. Molly of last season threw in the towel on the second day. No one can predict that. That's where I don't really like the eight week artificial horizon. That's way too little time to decide if a marriage is going to succeed. I would tell my wife in this situation that unless its obvious we aren't going to make it as a couple that I'm committed to long term and 8 weeks is just a speed bump.

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In earlier seasons, the cast pulled the plug on Decision Day if they knew it was dunzo.

 However, SM now blasts the couples if they break up so most stay married past the 8 week date but quietly files for divorce once the cameras are gone....

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3 hours ago, DrewPaul2010 said:

I knew a divorced couple living separately that still got together for sex a few times a week. They worked well in that activity but would argue on the way out. Even doing this show and using this method to marry seems so out of character for the kind of man Dave seems to be (very self assured). Both are trying but it still seems like a bridge too far. She doesn't seem like mother material to me...a woman who said she didn't think being married should entail more work.

Interesting!  I guess it's safer, easier and more pleasurable than to start all over with new people.   

I agree, Dave doesn't seem like he is the type for this set up.  I wonder if women think he kind of an "asshole" as I think of the dancing issue, the perfume comment, the cat frustration, etc. 

I don't think Amber would do well as a mother either.  IDK, M a y b e, just maybe 1 girl who is a freakishly good baby and near perfect at all other developmental stages.  

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15 minutes ago, crgirl412 said:

Interesting!  I guess it's safer, easier and more pleasurable than to start all over with new people.   

I agree, Dave doesn't seem like he is the type for this set up.  I wonder if women think he kind of an "asshole" as I think of the dancing issue, the perfume comment, the cat frustration, etc. 

I don't think Amber would do well as a mother either.  IDK, M a y b e, just maybe 1 girl who is a freakishly good baby and near perfect at all other developmental stages.  

I do think Amber would be a much more chill person paired with a more relaxed, more easy-going husband. The big problem with Amber having kids is, she couldn't handle being a parent alone.

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6 hours ago, Neurochick said:

 

I don't understand all of this diagnosing of people.  I don't know if Mia is a sociopath/psychopath/narcissist/or just plain strange.  I don't know if Dave is on any spectrum.  I don't think it's possible to know these things as we're watching a highly edited (badly), probably scripted reality show where we see a tiny particle of these people's lives. 

 

Observation, wild speculation, armchair diagnosing - it’s what we do here! Otherwise, what’s the fun? ?

Edited by Jade Foxx
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Absurd attention to the most minuscule nothings, outright foolery, bold projections based on whims, throwing handfuls of conversational spaghetti to incite the faithful.....anything to tickle the funny bone or irritate the last nerve.....it's all good...

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13 hours ago, Jade Foxx said:

Observation, wild speculation, armchair diagnosing - it’s what we do here! Otherwise, what’s the fun? ?

What’s fun about pretending to be a doctor?

I think Mia is a garden variety fame hungry person.  No diagnosis necessary.

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21 hours ago, crgirl412 said:

Interesting!  I guess it's safer, easier and more pleasurable than to start all over with new people.   

I agree, Dave doesn't seem like he is the type for this set up.  I wonder if women think he kind of an "asshole" as I think of the dancing issue, the perfume comment, the cat frustration, etc. 

I don't think Amber would do well as a mother either.  IDK, M a y b e, just maybe 1 girl who is a freakishly good baby and near perfect at all other developmental stages.  

He's a bit analytical and aloof and could probably find non-verbal ways to show affection. The carriage was pretty classy. I'm glad she got over the perfume comment because I think he was trying to suggest he almost can't keep his hands off of her. I do give them credit for trying and taking the counselors advice. I could be wrong about Amber being a mom...for some woman that moment transforms them. For others sadly its just a bump in the road.  

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Mia feeling the need to tell her family about the possible move is purely cultural. She was raised by a Jamaican mother and a Trinidadian father. West Indian parents except you to tell them everything except what you do in the bedroom. So I understand her confusion as to why Tristan was upset. Most West Indian parents are overprotective,  hence her father's behavior and him also questioning everything. I'm not surprised that her arrest was a big secret, because they're most likely embarrassed.

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Dr. Jessica: Bobby, Danielle open the door it's Dr. Jessica...

Bobby: Go away, we're good.

Dr. Jessica: I heard Danielle is having a hard time emoting to the cameras, she didn't answer any of the embarrassingly personal questions about  your sex life.

Bobby: We threw away the slips of paper but are having fun taking turns talking in a deep voice into The Fish Bowl.

Dr. Jessica: Let me in and maybe I can twist her arm to coerce her to answer intimate questions about things that make her visibly uncomfortable.

Bobby: You know I won't let that happen...now get off my property.

Y'all have a nice day, Dr. Jessica...now git...

Edited by humbleopinion
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3 hours ago, humbleopinion said:

Dr. Jessica: Bobby, Danielle open the door it's Dr. Jessica...

Bobby: Go away, we're good.

Dr. Jessica: I heard Danielle is having a hard time emoting to the cameras, she didn't answer any of the embarrassingly personal questions about  your sex life.

Bobby: We threw away the slips of paper but are having fun taking turns talking in a deep voice into The Fish Bowl.

Dr. Jessica: Let me in and maybe I can twist her arm to coerce her to answer intimate questions about things that make her visibly uncomfortable.

Bobby: You know I won't let that happen...now get off my property.

Y'all have a nice day, Dr. Jessica...now git...

Love this!  It would be great if they ended up being the couple that the show couldn't wrangle into playing their game and going along with the script.  That's quite a dilemma for the show, since they would hate that, but love a couple being successful.

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14 hours ago, DrewPaul2010 said:

He's a bit analytical and aloof and could probably find non-verbal ways to show affection. The carriage was pretty classy. I'm glad she got over the perfume comment because I think he was trying to suggest he almost can't keep his hands off of her. I do give them credit for trying and taking the counselors advice. I could be wrong about Amber being a mom...for some woman that moment transforms them. For others sadly its just a bump in the road.  

Amber (and I did too) took the perfume comment to mean that she put too much on.  I didn't even think at all that he meant that it was a good too powerful.  That is a very positive way of looking at it and it is very possible!  I want to know now!   

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Dave could have chosen his words better...intoxicating...alluring...both better choices.

Nope, Dave went with “almost overpowering” which brings to mind...

Wowza, crack a window...my eyes are watering from your fumes....

The qualifier “almost”doesn’t soften the blow ....so Negative Amber had to shake that almost insult off

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On 8/31/2018 at 12:46 PM, Neurochick said:

I agree with you regarding the arrest, but I disagree with the rest of this post.  What are "appropriate boundaries" anyway?  Who gets to say what are and what are not appropriate boundaries; and appropriate for who?  I think one of the worst things in psychology is to push everybody into a small box as to what is correct behavior or not.  People have different boundaries.  Not everything is dysfunction, not everything requires therapy.  Not everything is enmeshed. 

I think not being able to respect an ex's wishes to stay away from them is a disregard of "appropriate boundaries".  I'm not sure I would say that disregarding boundaries is a chronic pattern with Mia, though.  I don't have enough information on that, although I think her bringing up the possible move in front of her sister and father was arguably a boundary thing too.  Thinking that she can speak for Tristan or on his behalf without his consent was in my opinion crossing one of his boundaries.  Neither of these things, though, is necessarily a sign of enmeshment.  I've known people that are always either consciously or subconsciously creating "drama" with family and in other significant relationships, and I think Mia might be one of those.  Sometimes this points to either Narcissism or Borderline personality disorders.  I think we could argue both with Mia as an armchair sport and not really get anywhere, but it is interesting to try, in my opinion!

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Off the cutting floor of the film editors of MAFS.....

Danielle answered The Fish Bowl questions after all...but her answers were too boring...more time was needed for the Tristan "light lunch" segment

How would I like Bobby to initiate sex?

Bobby gets my motor running hot every morning by making me breakfast on the go, packing my lunch, taking care of the dogs, cleaning up the kitchen and house before we both head out to work, checks up on me that I got to work safely....the feeling of being well taken care of is a power aphrodisiac...

When do I feel the sexiest?

Bobby is holding Henry in the lazy boy like a baby and they are both looking at me with puppy dog eyes filled with unconditional love....

How to make our sex life better?

Bobby yanks the tricked out pick up with the bed and pillows in the back into Drive, peels out of the Drive in and we go to a isolated place away from the city lights and

friggin do it under the stars.....maybe later in hunting season do it in the duck blind waiting for flocks to fly over...he likes the outdoors, I'll be in camouflage clothes, neon orange hat...he won't be able to control himself...

Edited by humbleopinion
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On 9/2/2018 at 11:32 AM, crgirl412 said:

Amber (and I did too) took the perfume comment to mean that she put too much on.  I didn't even think at all that he meant that it was a good too powerful.  That is a very positive way of looking at it and it is very possible!  I want to know now!   

I told my husband what Dave said, and he absolutely thinks it was about the perfume being too strong, which is more typical of a male experience with women's perfume.  Given what we know about Dave so far, he is not someone to be overly lavish in praise/compliments with his words, and we have definitely seen him be critical of Amber with his words.  So it would seem more likely that he wasn't telling her that in a good way.

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I predict Bobby and Danielle won't make it.  I think that story line is simply leading us along.  Wait and see then blast me!

The surprise ending. 

I think we see why most of these folks never married and now in their later years are 'taking a chance on love' .    None of them are pleasing or wish to please another.  That's why we are all here watching and hoping for a connection.  Uggg.

LOL you gotta love this show. 

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On 8/30/2018 at 10:36 AM, humbleopinion said:

So what is Dave's fantasy?

A wife he can run his fingers through her soft silky hair... not get his fingers tangled up in a blond Brillo pad.....

His laundry clean and folded, dishes washed and put away...Paisley visiting friends for an extended visit...

Knowing Amber's financial situation...letting her have a pass is the best indication his marriage is as temporary as the Basset furniture they considered "lease to own"

A wife that didn't sleep with gym guy.....

I would say Dave is 'too late for the party'.  Those gals are in their 20's not approaching their 40's with over done hair and nails and a cat companion.  She eats out so there weren't dishes and all that jazz in HER single apartment kitchen. 

I'm pretty sure Amber has slept with Gym Guy and all his friends.  It makes me uncomfortable when Dave introduces Amber to his friends.  I always wonder 'him too'?   And if I'm thinking it you can be sure Dave's thinking it too.  Geeez.

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It's more then obvious little Bobby has never had a sexual relationship as he does now. Hopefully, blood will again flow to his brain and he will realize the only thing Danielle contributes to the relationship is bedroom Olympics. Naive is an understatement to describe little Bobby.

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On 9/3/2018 at 7:51 PM, NoWhammies said:

In their later years? Aren't they all in their 20s and 30s? 

Dave and Amber around 40.  Thompson and Bailly say around 30 but they look in their late 30's too.  I know Danielle is older than Bobby.  He probably late 20'a and she early 30's.  I think she's about six years older than him.

My point is none of them Spring Chickens!  lol

18 hours ago, NoKidding said:

It's more then obvious little Bobby has never had a sexual relationship as he does now. Hopefully, blood will again flow to his brain and he will realize the only thing Danielle contributes to the relationship is bedroom Olympics. Naive is an understatement to describe little Bobby.

Then again maybe Bobby will be grateful and happy for the good sex. 

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Besides anything physical, perhaps Bobby values the love, affection, thoughtfulness, humor, and companionship that Danielle "contributes to the relationship." But it might be that, to BOBBY if not to anyone else, Danielle is simply the cat's pajamas!

I think Mia might duck and hide her head and barely tolerate a peck  because she is not attracted to Tristan and would prefer not to look at him.

Edited by LennieBriscoe
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On 9/5/2018 at 4:22 PM, gonecrackers said:

I don't think Mia is attracted to Tristan at all. Her first remarks about him, before he all of a sudden became her 'rock' after her arrest, were something to that affect. I don't believe that's changed; she's just changed her shtick.

Yes, plus didn't she admit that she was far more interested in the donuts he brought her than him in those briefs?  Very telling.

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