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S09.E05: Brandon Leaves

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Ah yes, we are now at the point where a show that was originally premised around the Walsh family's adjustment from Minnesota to Beverly Hills has no more Walsh's and is now about Walsh family friends, acquaintances and people who happen to live in the the house where the Walsh family once resided.  And we still have a season to go. 

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Gonna finally throw my 9+ seasons' worth of rage into this one comment: MINNEAPOLIS IS NOT HICKSVILLE. So many throwaway references to 'cowboys riding herd' and Mpls being a dust bowl where no one has ever eaten at a gotdamn chain restaurant or seen a celebrity. (PS our Planet Hollywood opened December '93 and we were eventually cursed with a Hard Rock Cafe as well.) We have the 2nd most theatres per capita in the country and every kind of sports team.  It's a proper metropolitan area of over 3 million people. 

In addition, I realize this was the days before Google but every single reference they made to the Twin Cities metro was just plain wrong; it was like they pointed at a map and picked random cities and lakes without doing any fact-checking. Lake Minnetonka is not one that you go and stay in a cabin on, it's where rich people have permanent homes. Brenda mispronounces Wayzata. There were more but if I keep on going I'll need to take a rage nap and I just don't have the time today.

In conclusion: suck it, Brandon. Keep Minneapolis' name out your mouth and don't let the door frame hit your shelfhead on the way out! (Just kidding, it couldn't 'cause he's too short, tee hee!)

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Re: the "demonstratively false first season retcon".  I just don't get it.  If you want to refer to Brandon's first day at West Beverly, a.k.a. the pilot, refer to it ("Hey Steve, remember when we both got put on blast in the Wild Thing, WILD THING report?").  If you want to retcon in some story about Donna's saintliness, why not say it happened some non-specific time during his first year at West Beverly so we wouldn't immediately know it as a retcon.  GRRR.  A show could definitely not get away with something like that today.

Kelly Being A Bitch to Matt, a near-stranger, about his responsibilities to look out for Leah and her baby is even more ridiculous when you remember that Kelly has completely abandoned any kind of outreach/social work to run a tacky boutique.  And what does/is Kelly going to do at the boutique anyway?  She's not a designer, she has no kind of business experience, is she really just going to fold clothes like she's a teenager who got sick of babysitting?  And where did she even get the money to sink into this place, Sean Donely?

It is kinda douchey that Jason Priestly comes back for the finale, but only in a video message.  "Sure, I'll come back to the show that's still paying me as an executive producer, but I don't want to, like, actually interact with anybody."  I mean, it's not like he had something else going on, right?

Edited by TeeVee329
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Those black platform slides get a lot of work this season. I know that because I had a pair- the shame- and I remember noticing them a couple of times.

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And the last Walsh leaves Beverly Hills forever.

Yet there are still 48 episodes in this never ending monstrosity of a show. Why?

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What a douche move for him to refer to his parents as "Jim and Cindy" again --- one last time for good measure! I do wonder if everyone in this cast just hated each other by this season. I never saw any of these episodes, it's only interesting in this podcast format, lol. 

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26 minutes ago, TimeyWimey52 said:

What a douche move for him to refer to his parents as "Jim and Cindy" again --- one last time for good measure!

Thank you! I always hated when he did that.

And always with that goddamn tone.

Haaaate. 

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I wonder who all the strangers standing around at the store opening are. We all know that Kelly and Donna doesn’t know anyone. My best guess is that they all got a voucher for a free cocktail to show up. 

Edited by Nanna
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3 hours ago, Nanna said:

I wonder who all the strangers standing around at the store opening are. We all know that Kelly and Donna doesn’t know anyone. My best guess is that they all got a voucher for a free cocktail to show up. 

I like the tall guy with the nice smile upstaging Brandon's glare. He should have been there, standing a little bit in front of Brandon, all nine years.

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Quote

Him hate book! Him skip book like rock into flame house!

Thank you. Will now be calling fireplaces flame houses.

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In his memoir he mentions that on his last day when he left it was just like any other day leaving the set - no party or send off for him. Makes sense JP - you spent 9 years as braying at everyone on the show. And now they are pissed bc you are going to bray as Executive producer

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Need to chime in on Garth's hair... I think she actually liked it. I'm almost positive I saw a wedding picture with a similar updo/spiky waterfall thing happening. I only remember it because I think she ended up getting married around the same time as I did (2002). I'm old... my wedding counterparts were Gwen Stephani/Gavin from Bush and Sarah Michelle Gellar/Freddie Prinze (they are still together I think).

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Do they ever address why the Walsh house is still being used? Do these idiots even pay rent there?  I get why logistically it makes sense for the show but do they even bother to address it?

Kelly and Matt... ugh! It would have been way better to have a love-hate relationship, where she is always being a bitch about Matt's clients and they argue and then end up in bed and then go back to hating each other. 

On ‎8‎/‎27‎/‎2018 at 10:01 AM, benteen said:

I remember so hoping at the time that Brandon's car would blow up when he drove away.

Just like Jack!  That would have been ridiculously soapy.

 

19 hours ago, TimeyWimey52 said:

What a douche move for him to refer to his parents as "Jim and Cindy" again

I'm in my 40's and have kids and if I EVER dreamed of calling my parents by their first names, they would throttle me (even though they live in another country now).  

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21 hours ago, penguinnj said:

Those black platform slides get a lot of work this season. I know that because I had a pair- the shame- and I remember noticing them a couple of times.

evvvvvvverybody had them. (I had them -- stretch nylon Steve Madden slides AND stretch nylon Steve Madden LOAFERS.)

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2 hours ago, RosieRose221 said:

In his memoir he mentions that on his last day when he left it was just like any other day leaving the set

Is his memoir worth reading? Does it have interesting 90210 gossip? 

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Me to my radio after Brandon's reminiscence: None of that happened!
Tara, immediately after: None of that happened!

I even used the same tone. Perhaps I've been listening too long.

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5 hours ago, CurlyATX said:

I'm in my 40's and have kids and if I EVER dreamed of calling my parents by their first names, they would throttle me (even though they live in another country now).  

I am not positive my kids know what my first name is. 

As for Jason Priestley- I have a faint recollection that he ultimately left the show because of some beef with actual Aaron Spelling. I can't remember exactly. It probably doesn't matter.

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21 hours ago, CurlyATX said:

Do they ever address why the Walsh house is still being used? Do these idiots even pay rent there?  I get why logistically it makes sense for the show but do they even bother to address it?

Kelly and Matt... ugh! It would have been way better to have a love-hate relationship, where she is always being a bitch about Matt's clients and they argue and then end up in bed and then go back to hating each other. 

Just like Jack!  That would have been ridiculously soapy.

 

I'm in my 40's and have kids and if I EVER dreamed of calling my parents by their first names, they would throttle me (even though they live in another country now).  

I call my parents by their first names and have always done so - I know a couple of other people who do as well. But the thing is: Brandon doesn’t, he calls them mom and dad (daaaad), but then he sometimes refers to them by their first names, which ... why? Why can’t he just say “my parents”. Because he’s an asshole is why. 

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20 hours ago, TimeyWimey52 said:

Is his memoir worth reading? Does it have interesting 90210 gossip? 

mostly stuff about Shandoh and her "Diva Rep" but it also has some stories about his friendship with Luke and Ian and some stories about Aaron Spelling. And his relationship with Christine Elise.   Its an easy read. I found surprising and sweet that the first person he saw when he woke up from his car wreck was Luke. Check your local Dollar Tree for a paperback copy for $1 lol

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22 hours ago, CurlyATX said:

Do they ever address why the Walsh house is still being used? Do these idiots even pay rent there?  I get why logistically it makes sense for the show but do they even bother to address it?

Steve's rich or whatever, why didn't they just have him buy the damn house? (maybe he does later? I have zero memory of Season 9 other than him having a baby with Janet and Mrs. Teasely attending Donna's bachelorette party)

In addition to everything else that was totally retconned in that trip down memory lane, shut up David. You don't remember that. Even if it did happen (which it didn't), you're a year younger than the rest of the gang. You weren't friends with any of them. You didn't know any of them. You and Dead Scott were too busy getting picked on by jocks and sneaking into Mary-Ann Moore's party to see Brandon trip and fall (which he didn't).

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1 hour ago, atlanticslide said:

Steve's rich or whatever, why didn't they just have him buy the damn house? (maybe he does later? I have zero memory of Season 9 other than him having a baby with Janet and Mrs. Teasely attending Donna's bachelorette party)

I feel like they tried to make it seem like Steve and Janet were just regular working people in Beverly Hills, paying the bills, making car payments, presumably paying rent? It really was never clarified. Show really got away from the "these are the rich kids of Beverly Hills" premise of the series. 

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On 8/28/2018 at 10:29 AM, CurlyATX said:

Do they ever address why the Walsh house is still being used? Do these idiots even pay rent there?  I get why logistically it makes sense for the show but do they even bother to address it?

 

Wasn't there an episode where Steve tried to pay his rent with an American Express card? 

I'm assuming they kept the house so Brandon would have a place to live, but they did try to originally sell it and I'm not sure why they never re-listed the house after the first buyer fell through?

I don't remember what happens that Steve et al get to stay in the house after Brandon moves.

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The entire thing about the Walsh house makes me nuts!  

I know they constantly say they aren't rich but they were, at least, upper middle class when they lived in Minnesota and Jim was probably making mid six figures when they moved to Beverly Hills.  I'm sure their housing is paid for by his firm while they're living in Hong Kong.  

But that house is still a pretty significant asset.  Even if they decided to keep it for Brandon to use while he was in BH and didn't charge him rent while he was in college, I have a hard time believing they didn't ask the other people who lived there the post-college years for rent.  Especially since some of these folks were from wealthy families and I feel like Jim and Cindy would have wanted them to learn a little bit of Midwestern responsibility or whatever.  

But once Brandon left the scene, they would have sold the house.  Even if it was just to Steve or whoever was living there at the time, without an agent and at slightly below market value (if they decided to be super generous), they would have sold it.  

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I think later on, every rando ends up living there including Matt!  It's even referred to as The Walsh House when no freaking Walsh's live there!  I thought originally the firm owned the house but when Jim negotiated to stay in BH (after his big raise to move back to Minnesota), they actually took over the house payments.  

The thing with Steve and the AmEx was right after college- all stupid.  Do these idiots even pay rent? I'm sure it's nothing since even the beach house 3 BD was something like $300/each (when David schemed money for his drug problems)?

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The Walsh House was retconned more times than Valerie's Dead Dad. Per my recollection, at the end of season 1 when they were going to move back to Minneapolis, it was mentioned that Jim's COMPANY owned the house, it was like, leased by his firm for them for some reason. Then when they moved to Hong Kong, it was retconned that they owned the house and were going to sell, and the gang threw a huge party to trash the joint because the seller planned to tear it down. But that fell through. 

Then the gang just lived there for the rest of college, which at least makes a small amount of sense. Post-college everyone just sort of rotated in an out of living there and it eventually became Janet and Steve's house with the baby? Did they buy it from the Walshes? Did they pay rent? WHO KNOWS!?

And don't get me started on everyone's finances. HOW did Kelly and Donna just start up a boutique at age 23 with no money or business experience whatsoever? How did Kelly's fucking psych degree prepare her for this? Or for her future career in "public relations" (in quotes because it has as much to do with actual PR as Samantha on S&TC)? 

I feel like the retcons only get worse from here on out. Don't forget Dylan comes back as a heroin junkie, which everyone is so concerned about they forget all about his alcoholism, which was the dominant storyline of his first 5 seasons on the show. I remember scenes of him just hanging out drinking casual beers with Steve and David and wanting to scream at the TV.

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I assumed the clothing store was bankrolled by the parents, right?  Or perhaps each of the girls had trusts that matured when they turned 21? I couldn't imagine anyone giving them a loan unless it was cosigned by the Martins.  After all, Kelly's dad is an embezzler. 

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Steve busts out a bottle of champagne immediately after Dylan shows up, which was also a stupid idea since Noah also has a drinking problem and just had a DUI.

Also, Kelly buys Dylan a classic car because he's mopey and sad, when they are both dating other people!

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46 minutes ago, CurlyATX said:

After all, Kelly's dad is an embezzler. 

THIS, and why dafuq was Bill T so surprised about Parker Lewis scamming Val when he was apparently doing money crimes at the same time? Legit like fewer than five episodes separated his arrest and Parker Lewis' scheming. Fuck's sake. 

 

(eta: I know that was like 148 episodes ago but I'm still annoyed.)

Edited by Molly Cule
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Oh how I loved those Steve madden slides. They were ridiculously comfortable. I figured we have about 2 more years before they are fully back although I've seen versions on stores already. Bircks need to complete their circle first.

I always liked the Kelly/Brandon goodbye. Don't hate me. I thought it was well done, stumbling cameraman aside.

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On 8/28/2018 at 2:22 AM, TeeVee329 said:

Re: the "demonstratively false first season retcon"

I legit thought he was describing a dream he'd had about his first day at school - like one of those dreams where you realise you're wearing no clothes in front of a crowd. It had the same sort of 'find yourself in an embarrassing situation in front of strangers' feel as that kind of dream. But no, apparently that all happened for real.

smells like bullshit.jpg

Edited by purist
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22 hours ago, Tooch said:

I feel like the retcons only get worse from here on out. Don't forget Dylan comes back as a heroin junkie, which everyone is so concerned about they forget all about his alcoholism, which was the dominant storyline of his first 5 seasons on the show. I remember scenes of him just hanging out drinking casual beers with Steve and David and wanting to scream at the TV.

Yeah, I cannot wait to hear Tara and Sarah scream about that at length, what an idiotic retcon and something you could neeeever get away with today.

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22 hours ago, meggonzo said:

Steve busts out a bottle of champagne immediately after Dylan shows up

Yes! Dylan's very first scene back on the show where he became famous for being a relapsing alcoholic struggling with sobriety was him gulping champagne with the gang at Thanksgiving like it was no big deal.

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23 hours ago, Tooch said:

The Walsh House was retconned more times than Valerie's Dead Dad. Per my recollection, at the end of season 1 when they were going to move back to Minneapolis, it was mentioned that Jim's COMPANY owned the house, it was like, leased by his firm for them for some reason. Then when they moved to Hong Kong, it was retconned that they owned the house and were going to sell, and the gang threw a huge party to trash the joint because the seller planned to tear it down. But that fell through. 

Then the gang just lived there for the rest of college, which at least makes a small amount of sense. Post-college everyone just sort of rotated in an out of living there and it eventually became Janet and Steve's house with the baby? Did they buy it from the Walshes? Did they pay rent? WHO KNOWS!?

And don't get me started on everyone's finances. HOW did Kelly and Donna just start up a boutique at age 23 with no money or business experience whatsoever? How did Kelly's fucking psych degree prepare her for this? Or for her future career in "public relations" (in quotes because it has as much to do with actual PR as Samantha on S&TC)? 

I feel like the retcons only get worse from here on out. Don't forget Dylan comes back as a heroin junkie, which everyone is so concerned about they forget all about his alcoholism, which was the dominant storyline of his first 5 seasons on the show. I remember scenes of him just hanging out drinking casual beers with Steve and David and wanting to scream at the TV.

When the twins were arguing about colleges, the parents decided to taking out a second loan to pay for their annoying children’s choices (and then they didn’t have to anyway), so they must have owned the house at that point. I can buy that they didn’t sell when they moved to Hong Kong, after all they maybe didn’t know how long they would be staying there, but after a couple of years they would def have sold. Why pay interest on a loan on a house just so some randos can live there? 

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15 hours ago, Shangrilala said:

Oh how I loved those Steve madden slides. They were ridiculously comfortable. I figured we have about 2 more years before they are fully back although I've seen versions on stores already. Bircks need to complete their circle first.

You'll get my Birkenstocks off my cold dead feet.

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A few years ago, I dressed as my "90's me" for Halloween (jean shorts, tights, flannel shirt, boots) and several of my young staffers said the look was totally appropriate now.  WTF?!

I am hoping we don't get the sundress with the baby tee underneath or (I apologize in advance for my participation in this), the platform flip-flop.  Are we entering the phase of the satin jeans, not-quite-racist-Chinese inspired tops, or the super mini skirts with the big slits? 

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Gonna finally throw my 9+ seasons' worth of rage into this one comment: MINNEAPOLIS IS NOT HICKSVILLE. So many throwaway references to 'cowboys riding herd' and Mpls being a dust bowl where no one has ever eaten at a gotdamn chain restaurant or seen a celebrity. (PS our Planet Hollywood opened December '93 and we were eventually cursed with a Hard Rock Cafe as well.) We have the 2nd most theatres per capita in the country and every kind of sports team.  It's a proper metropolitan area of over 3 million people. 

In addition, I realize this was the days before Google but every single reference they made to the Twin Cities metro was just plain wrong; it was like they pointed at a map and picked random cities and lakes without doing any fact-checking. Lake Minnetonka is not one that you go and stay in a cabin on, it's where rich people have permanent homes. Brenda mispronounces Wayzata. There were more but if I keep on going I'll need to take a rage nap and I just don't have the time today.

In conclusion: suck it, Brandon. Keep Minneapolis' name out your mouth and don't let the door frame hit your shelfhead on the way out! (Just kidding, it couldn't 'cause he's too short, tee hee!)

This is the best thing I’ve read in days!

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The Walsh House was retconned more times than Valerie's Dead Dad. Per my recollection, at the end of season 1 when they were going to move back to Minneapolis, it was mentioned that Jim's COMPANY owned the house, it was like, leased by his firm for them for some reason. Then when they moved to Hong Kong, it was retconned that they owned the house and were going to sell, and the gang threw a huge party to trash the joint because the seller planned to tear it down. But that fell through. 

Then the gang just lived there for the rest of college, which at least makes a small amount of sense. Post-college everyone just sort of rotated in an out of living there and it eventually became Janet and Steve's house with the baby? Did they buy it from the Walshes? Did they pay rent? WHO KNOWS!?

And don't get me started on everyone's finances. HOW did Kelly and Donna just start up a boutique at age 23 with no money or business experience whatsoever? How did Kelly's fucking psych degree prepare her for this? Or for her future career in "public relations" (in quotes because it has as much to do with actual PR as Samantha on S&TC)? 

I feel like the retcons only get worse from here on out. Don't forget Dylan comes back as a heroin junkie, which everyone is so concerned about they forget all about his alcoholism, which was the dominant storyline of his first 5 seasons on the show. I remember scenes of him just hanging out drinking casual beers with Steve and David and wanting to scream at the TV.

Re: Dylan’s oh so casual drinking DRIVES ME CRAZY!!! I think I remember him fobbing it off as{pinched brow} “some people can”
Maybe... BUT NOT DYLAN McFREAKinAY!!!!

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17 hours ago, GoRunner said:

This is the best thing I’ve read in days!

*tips hat* It came from a place of pure Minnesota passive-aggressive lefse-fueled rage. Skol!

I love the random end-of-show challenges but I for one would love to hear a commemorative return to MBaDtK for Dylan's return. 

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  On 8/31/2018 at 7:49 PM, GoRunner said:

This is the best thing I’ve read in days!

*tips hat* It came from a place of pure Minnesota passive-aggressive lefse-fueled rage. Skol!

I love the random end-of-show challenges but I for one would love to hear a commemorative return to MBaDtK for Dylan's return. 

Yes!! Except I’m mostly so incredibly annoyed with him in the remaining episodes, maybe it should be Mad, Bad, and Annoying to Know.

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