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The Duggars and Their World: Fashion, Food, Finance, Schoolin’ and Child Rearin'


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6 hours ago, bigskygirl said:

Watching an episode of Designing Women, and Anthony was talking about his praying family members. His aunt and uncle would pray before getting on the freeway, they would pray after getting off the freeway, and pray when they were going on the side street. Once again, my first thought went to the Duggars and their kind.

I don't know, praying before you get on the freeway sounds like a good idea to me,but I live outside of Houston Texas so that may have something to do with it.

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6 hours ago, EAG46 said:

I pray every time I get onto the Beltway here in DC and I'm pretty much secular, so prayer before highway driving makes sense.  

I'm glad to see I'm not the only one!  I *love* DC but not the traffic.  Mr. Six has a 22-mile commute from our county, through Baltimore City, and into another county on 95.  It's been taking an hour most evenings with construction, and I silently pray as soon as I know he's on his way home.

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I was at a community pool today when 2 twenty-ish Mennonite girls walked in wearing their full Mennonite garb of shin-length dresses, aprons, and little white caps. They went into the restroom to change and guess what they were wearing??? NORMAL BATHING SUITS!!!! Now why do the Mennonites, who are almost as modest as the Amish, wear regular suits and the Duggars wear those horrible, full-length swim dresses?

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5 minutes ago, ehall1052 said:

I was at a community pool today when 2 twenty-ish Mennonite girls walked in wearing their full Mennonite garb of shin-length dresses, aprons, and little white caps. They went into the restroom to change and guess what they were wearing??? NORMAL BATHING SUITS!!!! Now why do the Mennonites, who are almost as modest as the Amish, wear regular suits and the Duggars wear those horrible, full-length swim dresses?

How are we going to know how modest they are if they're not wearing inappropriate or horribly modified clothing? You can buy modest skin covering bathing suits that don't look like something out of the 1900's just like you can buy modest wedding and bridesmaid's dress. The Duggars make everything weird to call attention to themselves and their holier-than-thou schtick.

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22 hours ago, ehall1052 said:

I was at a community pool today when 2 twenty-ish Mennonite girls walked in wearing their full Mennonite garb of shin-length dresses, aprons, and little white caps. They went into the restroom to change and guess what they were wearing??? NORMAL BATHING SUITS!!!! Now why do the Mennonites, who are almost as modest as the Amish, wear regular suits and the Duggars wear those horrible, full-length swim dresses?

Because the Duggars' main aim in life is to PROVE OSTENTATIOUSLY how much better they are than anybody else? 

I mean, that commandment's in at least a couple of the gospels, right? 

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(edited)
7 hours ago, bigskygirl said:

My first thought after reading the article was my family, but take a guess at my second thought after reading it *cough Duggars* *cough Deredick*

http://www.positivethingsonly.com/link-narcissistic-abuse-anxiety-disorders/

There's all kinds of studies of why folks become mentally ill. The most believed theory is threefold; genetic predisposition, environment and event, meaning that something in the environment was unhealthy which could be abuse, poverty, etc, and then an event like a car accident, witnessing a death, etc 'turns on' the gene and symptoms appear. 

The theory however does not hold true for everyone because everyone is different. There are folks who have lived traumatic childhoods, witnessed some horrific events and have a genetic predisposition and never become mentally ill.

Like many diseases, mental illness is a crapshoot. Someone can live the most unhealthy lifestyle and live to 100 and some live healthy and have a host of illnesses or die young. 

Edited by GeeGolly
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3 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

There's all kinds of studies of why folks become mentally ill. The most believed theory is threefold; genetic predisposition, environment and event, meaning that something in the environment was unhealthy which could be abuse, poverty, etc, and then an event like a car accident, witnessing a death, etc 'turns on' the gene and symptoms appear. 

The theory however does not hold true for everyone because everyone is different. There are folks who have lived traumatic childhoods, witnessed some horrific events and have a genetic predisposition and never become mentally ill.

Like many diseases, mental illness is a crapshoot. Someone can live the most unhealthy lifestyle and live to 100 and some live healthy and have a host of illnesses or die young. 

totally agree @GeeGolly.  People speculate on what went wrong with someone or why someone with worse circumstances seems so normal.  You explained it.

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(edited)
On 6/18/2018 at 5:32 PM, ehall1052 said:

I was at a community pool today when 2 twenty-ish Mennonite girls walked in wearing their full Mennonite garb of shin-length dresses, aprons, and little white caps. They went into the restroom to change and guess what they were wearing??? NORMAL BATHING SUITS!!!! Now why do the Mennonites, who are almost as modest as the Amish, wear regular suits and the Duggars wear those horrible, full-length swim dresses?

Probably because they were 20 something girls without their parents.  They made their own decisions to swim in a swimsuit.  Just like Jill and Jinger are wearing pants now that they are married. Jill is in a more modern swim suit with board shorts recently.  I would bet anything that Jinger swims in a regular suit also.  Even Michelle got more modern lately with a swim skirt and rash guard shirt rather than that heavy, hot swim dress from years ago. 

I live near a tourist pool type attraction and my kids work there.  It is not unusual to see young adults come in the park or the area in religious clothing and change into a swimsuit or shorts etc.  Then change again before going home.  I look at it and smile.  

I think that is just the nature of being a young adult.  Trying to figure out who you are....are you wearing a hijab or not?  Mennonite dress or not?  Skirts or not? not?   Etc.  Eventually we find our way...sometimes we embrace our culture and religion and sometimes we venture out into something new.  Sometimes we meet in the middle.  

 

Edit to add:

I do understand what you mean about the Michelle and Jim Bob.  THEY are the ones who push this "we are so modest" crap.  The young adults seem to have moved away from that nonsense.  I wonder if Jinger or Jill would swim in a tankini in front of Jim Bob and Michelle.  Jinger is only filmed, so far, in skirts. 

Edited by Marigold
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I was just thinking about how some of us long for one of the Duggars to break away from the pack and maybe write a tell all.  I think it will happen, but not anytime soon.  19 kids and their offspring are too many to support and control as time goes by.  I think it's going to happen when years go by and interest wanes and it will be in the form of a "Where are they now?" story.  And those are often sad.  Maybe by then we won't even care any more.  It will probably end up being one of the younger ones, as the resources dry up.  

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On ‎7‎/‎7‎/‎2018 at 12:52 PM, BetyBee said:

I was just thinking about how some of us long for one of the Duggars to break away from the pack and maybe write a tell all.  I think it will happen, but not anytime soon.  19 kids and their offspring are too many to support and control as time goes by.  I think it's going to happen when years go by and interest wanes and it will be in the form of a "Where are they now?" story.  And those are often sad.  Maybe by then we won't even care any more.  It will probably end up being one of the younger ones, as the resources dry up.  

Hell, when the resources dry up I would not be surprised Jim Bob writes the tell all.

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What would a Duggar child tell us that we don't already know? That their oldest brother is a creep? That they were trained to obey before they could walk? That they were raised with an unhealthy curiosity about sex? That they were raised to be judgmental?

The only thing a tell all would tell us is that the author finally figured out JB & M were sad cult victims who in turn victimized their children.

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2 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

What would a Duggar child tell us that we don't already know? That their oldest brother is a creep? That they were trained to obey before they could walk? That they were raised with an unhealthy curiosity about sex? That they were raised to be judgmental?

The only thing a tell all would tell us is that the author finally figured out JB & M were sad cult victims who in turn victimized their children.

All true, but wouldn't it be interesting if their tell all was either more revealing or more twisted.

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I'd be interested in a tell-all. Not only is the family's image carefully curated for TV, but each and every one of them is forced by their extremely authoritarian, judgemental culture to carefully curate their image within their social world and even within their family, too. They have to play these roles and wear these masks literally all the time, from birth. So I would love to hear about the truth as it feels from the inside, behind those masks. I wouldn't expect to learn a ton of new information per se, but I think it would give a lot of insight. On the other hand, I think because they've always had to be so false all the time and to deny so much of their own humanity, and live in a world of mirrors where everyone else does the same, too, there might not be a lot of insight into themselves that they can even give.

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29 minutes ago, rue721 said:

I'd be interested in a tell-all. Not only is the family's image carefully curated for TV, but each and every one of them is forced by their extremely authoritarian, judgemental culture to carefully curate their image within their social world and even within their family, too. They have to play these roles and wear these masks literally all the time, from birth. So I would love to hear about the truth as it feels from the inside, behind those masks. I wouldn't expect to learn a ton of new information per se, but I think it would give a lot of insight. On the other hand, I think because they've always had to be so false all the time and to deny so much of their own humanity, and live in a world of mirrors where everyone else does the same, too, there might not be a lot of insight into themselves that they can even give.

It takes work, let me tell ya.  Probably a lot of time asking other people what their perception of you as a human being is (‘independent’?  ‘Spunky’? ‘Unflappable’?  ‘Serene’?  Etc.). It probably also helps if you find out and care what secular non-cult people say.  If someone had told them ‘I don’t care what anyone says, Jinger, I think you’d do just fine in a city’, ‘Josiah, I think you’d make a fine actor’, who knows what would have happened?

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Random thoughts ahead:

We were driving home from our vacation yesterday on I-75 and passed the exit for Crown College.  Now, I know it’s not Princeton, but it’s got a business program that is designed for fundies who want to run their own businesses. Why are the Duggars so frightened of higher education of any kind?  There are colleges out there that cater to fundies that want to do something other than “work for dad”.  It’s not like they’re going to hear anything that will challenge their belief at Crown College. I know college isn’t for everyone, but I can’t believe there’s not a single kid who hasn’t wanted to get some further education to do something other than be at JB’s beck and call.  

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I think JB and Michelle are more afraid of higher education because it could lead their children to think for themselves and not blindly follow what Ma and Pa Stupid want them to be and think. It is their way of controlling them. I also think laziness and poor home schooling also leads the kids not to end up getting higher education of any kind. They think they are fine in their own little cult world.

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But what's to keep at least ONE kid out of 19 from applying to college, on their own, and, gasp, taking out a student loan?  If the Duggar gothardite robots had any initiative at all, ONE of them would have followed their dreams of becoming a lawyer, nurse midwife, veterinarian, etc.  These kidults did have these ambitions at one time.  Surely JB is not holding a gun to their heads.

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(edited)
1 hour ago, bigskygirl said:

I think JB and Michelle are more afraid of higher education because it could lead their children to think for themselves and not blindly follow what Ma and Pa Stupid want them to be and think. It is their way of controlling them. I also think laziness and poor home schooling also leads the kids not to end up getting higher education of any kind. They think they are fine in their own little cult world.

I also don’t think they want any of their children to be “smarter” than them. Which makes me sad. 

Jim Boob’s head would explode. 

Edited by Westiepeach
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(edited)

No matter how conservative the institution, that many young people together, somebody's holding hands with somebody they think is cute and to whom they're not engaged. 

Edited by Temperance
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JB & Michelle have put the literal fear of God into these kids.  If you don't do what is outlined in the Bible, well, there's a special place for folks that don't, and it's not a fun place to go.  I can't help but wonder if some of them are just truly scared shitless about college (and 'normal' adult life).  What if they encounter others who don't hold every single belief?  They wouldn't know how to handle it.  They haven't had enough life experiences with the world.  If things happen outside of their perceived bubble, they aren't equipped mentally and emotionally to know what to do.  The kids will never experience anything beyond what JB & M have drilled into them.  These kids are puppets with two shitty parents handling the strings.

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1 hour ago, irisheyes said:

Random thoughts ahead:

We were driving home from our vacation yesterday on I-75 and passed the exit for Crown College.  Now, I know it’s not Princeton, but it’s got a business program that is designed for fundies who want to run their own businesses. Why are the Duggars so frightened of higher education of any kind?  There are colleges out there that cater to fundies that want to do something other than “work for dad”.  It’s not like they’re going to hear anything that will challenge their belief at Crown College. I know college isn’t for everyone, but I can’t believe there’s not a single kid who hasn’t wanted to get some further education to do something other than be at JB’s beck and call.  

Even if it was closed for summer or if summer school isn’t offered on Fridays, is it wrong/weird that I would want to drive to the campus and take a selfie or some photos as a souvenir, exclusively to document my own personal bizarre taste in TV shows?

Part of me would probably end up staring and gawking at seeing Real Life Fundies  (Imagine Steve Irwin’s accent here) in the only upper education institute that’s an option, where ladies wear skirts and men wear two t-shirts, even in 90 degree weather. Mating season is year round and is called “courting” in this particular habitat.

Another part of me would march my happity ass into the student store, but a t-shirt, wear it to a bar, take photos while enjoying an adult beverage (or four) and create an Instagram account just to post those photos.

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On 6/18/2018 at 2:32 PM, ehall1052 said:

I was at a community pool today when 2 twenty-ish Mennonite girls walked in wearing their full Mennonite garb of shin-length dresses, aprons, and little white caps. They went into the restroom to change and guess what they were wearing??? NORMAL BATHING SUITS!!!! Now why do the Mennonites, who are almost as modest as the Amish, wear regular suits and the Duggars wear those horrible, full-length swim dresses?

I follow a Mennonite lifestyle vlogger on YouTube and she wears the full Pilgrim dress and head covering but her decorating skills are off the charts, her home is on-trend and her personality is hilarious. It seems like some people are capable of following their religious convictions without being total sticks in the mud, the Duggars just don't fall into that category.

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42 minutes ago, sixlets said:

JB & Michelle have put the literal fear of God into these kids.  If you don't do what is outlined in the Bible, well, there's a special place for folks that don't, and it's not a fun place to go.  I can't help but wonder if some of them are just truly scared shitless about college (and 'normal' adult life).  What if they encounter others who don't hold every single belief?  They wouldn't know how to handle it.  They haven't had enough life experiences with the world.  If things happen outside of their perceived bubble, they aren't equipped mentally and emotionally to know what to do.  The kids will never experience anything beyond what JB & M have drilled into them.  These kids are puppets with two shitty parents handling the strings.

It's still kind of strange though, especially at this point, because both Derick and Jeremy have been to college, and secular ones at that, for a good long time.  Surely they would be able to both answer questions on the topic, and stand as proof that people do come out the other side in one piece (lol), right?

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1 hour ago, Westiepeach said:

I also don’t think they want any of their children to be “smarter” than them. Which makes me sad. 

Jim Boob’s head would explode. 

I should also add Jim Boob also does not want any of his children to be more successful than him either. 

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2 hours ago, sixlets said:

JB & Michelle have put the literal fear of God into these kids.  If you don't do what is outlined in the Bible, well, there's a special place for folks that don't, and it's not a fun place to go.  I can't help but wonder if some of them are just truly scared shitless about college (and 'normal' adult life).  What if they encounter others who don't hold every single belief?  They wouldn't know how to handle it.  They haven't had enough life experiences with the world.  If things happen outside of their perceived bubble, they aren't equipped mentally and emotionally to know what to do.  The kids will never experience anything beyond what JB & M have drilled into them.  These kids are puppets with two shitty parents handling the strings.

This is why it’s so bizarre to me that Tim Rod is going to college (supposedly) but the D’s seemed never to have entertained the idea (except maybe joe doing a semester at Clown?). The R’s seem even more backwards, and to keep away from the world. 

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31 minutes ago, awaken said:

This is why it’s so bizarre to me that Tim Rod is going to college (supposedly) but the D’s seemed never to have entertained the idea (except maybe joe doing a semester at Clown?). The R’s seem even more backwards, and to keep away from the world. 

Well, they did go to the big homeschool graduation for Timmy in a banquet hall/auditorium type setting, right?  Maybe there are also parent mixers organized by someone, and they hear other parents talk about college plans there.

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On 7/4/2017 at 11:16 AM, madpsych78 said:

I

 

JimBob wants to control every aspect of his children's lives for as long as he possibly can. Allowing them to go to college might lead to a successful career where they wouldn't need him. He's not going to have any of that.

Since JimBob is surely claiming all the adult kidlets on his income tax returns, it would be almost impossible for them to break away and go to college. You have to provide your federal income tax returns to get financial aid, which I doubt he would be willing to do if they're going without his approval. There isn't any indication that any of the adult kids have access to their TLC money and they don't have any job skills to support themselves while they go to college. Plus, from what we've seen, their education has been minimal, so they would end up needing a lot of remedial classes just to get up to speed. I just don't see any of them having the drive to overcome these obstacles.

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11 minutes ago, Nysha said:

JimBob wants to control every aspect of his children's lives for as long as he possibly can. Allowing them to go to college might lead to a successful career where they wouldn't need him. He's not going to have any of that.

Since JimBob is surely claiming all the adult kidlets on his income tax returns, it would be almost impossible for them to break away and go to college. You have to provide your federal income tax returns to get financial aid, which I doubt he would be willing to do if they're going without his approval. There isn't any indication that any of the adult kids have access to their TLC money and they don't have any job skills to support themselves while they go to college. Plus, from what we've seen, their education has been minimal, so they would end up needing a lot of remedial classes just to get up to speed. I just don't see any of them having the drive to overcome these obstacles.

That's a good point about the FAFSA. I had a weird home life and was unable to provide my parent's tax returns. It was a bureaucratic nightmare. I was able to get through community college because of scholarships without applying for the FAFSA, but finding a college to transfer to was virtually impossible. None of the 4-year colleges I applied to (including the University of Arkansas) were willing to consider me for financial aid without official court paperwork showing I had other guardians. I was able to get into a small religious college that wasn't as strict about admissions--still had to jump through hoops with them every year when it came to renew--but everywhere else would only waive the parent tax return rule if you were married, a military veteran, or of a certain age.

Until any of the Duggar kids get married or turn, I think, 24, they would be at Jim Bob's mercy when it comes to the FAFSA's requirements. 

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11 hours ago, Westiepeach said:

I also don’t think they want any of their children to be “smarter” than them. Which makes me sad. 

Jim Boob’s head would explode. 

 

10 hours ago, Westiepeach said:

I should also add Jim Boob also does not want any of his children to be more successful than him either. 

No, they don't. They don't want nor could they handle their kids being smarter or successful in anyway.  Its sad and infuriating at the same time. 

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(edited)

I think there are a couple of things at play in the lack of Duggars at Clown College

1- There's a fair bit of variety in degrees of fundyism (aka how controlling your parents are) from the Maxwells and the Rodrigui at one end to the "look pretty mainstream until you mention Catholicism" Seawalds and Vuolos at the other. Even at a place like Clown, they will run into secret rebels or kids from families that are (slightly) less legalistic than theirs. When kids get together, they're bound to talk and the last thing the Duggars want is for their kids to hear other godly fundy teens admitting that they kissed a guy or girl and liked it (and that God didn't get them for it).

2- The Duggars are all about image. If the kids go to college and then drop out because of the way Meechelle homefooled, it's going to be embarrassing. (Honestly, I think that's what happened with ,Joe, was it? He went, couldn't cut it, dropped out and his parents invented the cover story that he wasn't a student at all, just a godly role model or something.)

3- Money to support the kids whether they're out on their own or not. The Duggars have 16 or 17 (depending on the elusive source of Derrick's income) kids and 5 or 6 spouses and children depending on Duggar Industries for money and somehow it's working. Even before TLC, the Boob could come up with $200,000, a feat that many smaller families with good incomes could't replicate. I doubt the way they're getting their money is sustainable for that many people once TLC pulls out and the kiddults should all be getting some sort of training, but the Duggs aren't long term thinkers (See Dr Jill in Danger America). 

Edited by satrunrose
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On 7/14/2018 at 7:03 PM, bigskygirl said:

I think JB and Michelle are more afraid of higher education because it could lead their children to think for themselves and not blindly follow what Ma and Pa Stupid want them to be and think. It is their way of controlling them. I also think laziness and poor home schooling also leads the kids not to end up getting higher education of any kind. They think they are fine in their own little cult world.

THANK YOU for acknowledging that it is POOR homeschooling and not homeschooling that limits the Duggar kids. 

The Duggars embarrass normal homeschoolers. 

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On July 18, 2018 at 5:51 AM, Marigold said:

THANK YOU for acknowledging that it is POOR homeschooling and not homeschooling that limits the Duggar kids. 

The Duggars embarrass normal homeschoolers. 

Yes they do!  Several years ago when my husband and I moved for his job we were appalled at the local public school curriculum and looked into homeschooling.  That was the way we planned for when we had children.  Sadly we were never able to deliver or carry a child to term so we didn't need homeschooling, but I adore it when done right and not in the Duggar style.  

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We went to my nephew  & his  girlfriend's housewarming party yesterday. What a nice afternoon & evening. Luckily rains & storms held off & they have great deck & lawn area to entertain. Right away, I thought how the Duggar group would fit it. I know - they wouldn't or barely. Its nice to see what my nephew's 25'sh year olds friends are doing with their lives as I've known some of them since they were younger- jobs/careers, some still in school getting advanced degrees, marriage & a newborn thrown in for good measure (born into a 4 year marriage, parents are teachers) The "girls" were all dressed so nicely in sundresses & sandals without modesty tshirts & camisoles underneath. (Definitely some Nike moments.)  Also the alcohol & music would have kept the Duggars away or standing in corner with arms crossed thinking how their lives are better/superior.

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So I know we all have a great time every time Jill posts a new "recipe" but I saw this while procrastinating last night on youtube.  It's got Jana and some of the older boys making the Duggar version of cucumber salad.

Now I have a recipe for a summer cucumber salad.  It's got diced cucumbers, tomatoes and minced raw garlic, all mixed together in a bowl with balsamic vinegar salad dressing poured over and chilled in the fridge.  A friend of mine also adds diced onions to hers but since I'm allergic to onions, I pass on that ingredient.  

And then there's the Duggar version.  It almost makes snarking on Jill's recipes not as fun.  Almost that is.  I mean these girls were raised to be helpmeets and the perfect housewife and mother and they have NO skills.  None.

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3 hours ago, floridamom said:

So it takes FIVE DUGGARS to make a simple cucumber salad? How many of them would it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well considering slicing cucumbers and then sprinkling vinegar and salt on the before eating them immediately isn't a salad and I'm not even sure it counts for a quick pickle, then  I'm guessing at least 4 Duggars and 2 chaperones to shop for the light bulbs and the entire family to witness it being screwed in so that no one is defrauded.  They really should just switch to candlelight except they'd probably burn the house down in the first week.

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(edited)

My guess for the lightbulb = 2-4: Jana to screw it in while Michelle and the male Duggars sit around doing nothing, and one or more of the lost girls to keep Josie from licking the burned out bulb. 

Edited by EVS
clarity
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On 7/30/2018 at 10:16 AM, DragonFaerie said:

So I know we all have a great time every time Jill posts a new "recipe" but I saw this while procrastinating last night on youtube.  It's got Jana and some of the older boys making the Duggar version of cucumber salad.

Now I have a recipe for a summer cucumber salad.  It's got diced cucumbers, tomatoes and minced raw garlic, all mixed together in a bowl with balsamic vinegar salad dressing poured over and chilled in the fridge.  A friend of mine also adds diced onions to hers but since I'm allergic to onions, I pass on that ingredient.  

And then there's the Duggar version.  It almost makes snarking on Jill's recipes not as fun.  Almost that is.  I mean these girls were raised to be helpmeets and the perfect housewife and mother and they have NO skills.  None.

Jana, when you mentioned the addition of water, the word you were looking for was “dilute.” 

How is she almost 30 yrs old and doesn’t know that word?!

I realize their vocabulary had always been limited, but now it’s just so embarrassing to watch and listen to them try to explain anything! They clearly don’t read, which really pisses me off, nor do they walk away after “fellowship events” having learned a new adjective or verb.

None of this is a newsflash to anyone, I know, but it’s so damn depressing to me (as a teacher) to watch a group of adults truly struggle to come up with several sentences to explain things without “um” and “yeah” used every 2 seconds. They all need a public speaking class pronto! 

Freakin D-bags and their Homefooling has done nothing but set up their offspring for a lifetime of mockery. 

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My late husband used to make a salad kind of like this with cucumbers, Walla Walla sweet onions, vinegar, and sugar. I hated it, but his entire family thought it was the bomb. 

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1 hour ago, Nysha said:

My late husband used to make a salad kind of like this with cucumbers, Walla Walla sweet onions, vinegar, and sugar. I hated it, but his entire family thought it was the bomb. 

I would love it, because I love just about any salad that has cucumbers.  Mr. Xword hates cucumbers, and almost every green veggie.  

WW onions are so good!  I love this time of year, produce-wise.

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2 hours ago, Nysha said:

My late husband used to make a salad kind of like this with cucumbers, Walla Walla sweet onions, vinegar, and sugar. I hated it, but his entire family thought it was the bomb. 

My ex-husband also made this but he also added sour cream to it.

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