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S14.E10: The Men Tell All


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(edited)

 I wonder if Jordan is in the running for his own show. Not "The Bachelor"; more like "Chrisley Knows Best" or "KUWTK."

Call it "Jordan: My Image is Me." Or "Jordan: Man of Professionality." Or "Jordanland."

I'd watch. ? 

Edited by LennieBriscoe
  • Love 15
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8 hours ago, chocolatine said:

 

I really really hope Colton is not the next Bachelor, but I'm worried that TPTB are already in love with the idea of a charitable football virgin. Didn't they try to get Tim Tebow aeons ago, before they went with 100% recycled content? Colton's like a very poor man's Tim Tebo

This show is way overly impressed with men who play football and the grown women who cheer for them.  That must be why hometown dates often take us to the old high school  and show us a sports trophy in a case or,  as has happened a few times, a bit of actual baton twirling by the woman. 

6 hours ago, LuvMyShows said:

Yes.  And it actually seemed weird how determined he was to ask her to still be friends.

 

The first few break-ups in my life, the guy asked if we could stay friends, and I lived to learn that my future, friendly phone calls were immediately taken by him as a move to get back together.  After that, when someone asked me if we could be friends I just said, "No, sorry,  I find that sort of arrangement awkward and sad."  Which is how Jason came across to me last night.

Please show, let us have an entirely new bachelor -- someone with an impressive job, good looks, intelligent conversation and an air of maturity.

  • Love 15
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Jordan doesn't bother me. Whether it's shtick or he truly is a narcissist, I find it funny when the shows ridiculousness is thrown back in its face. 

Jason could not have been more phony and arrogant. He already believes his own hype and seems much changed from Becca's season. I mean his opening comments were SO practiced that you could almost hear the producers telling him that it's his chance to show if he can be articulate and command a room like a lead needs to. The folded politician hands only made him seem more disingenuous (I'm sorry disingenuine). 

Connor was quite the hypocrite calling out Chris for losing his composure.. really dude who chucked a picture in the pool on like night 2. 

I'm guessing Jason gets the gig, but Colton certainly seems to be auditioning as well. Both men's tears were ridiculously forced. 

  • Love 16
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(edited)

On the plus side, Jason cut back on the grease.

On the negative side... what the heck was that guy in the tux jacket and bowtie thinking with those short pants?

Edited by DEL901
  • Love 9
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Watch out Ben Higgins ... looks like Jordan is going to be taking over the current camera-hog role you've been holding for the past few years.  

That whole episode with the f-bombs this and the strutting and the high water pants should have been left in the can. Might have been fun to see the explosion on the set but as TV it was hard to watch. This is where Jason pulls ahead because he doesn't enter into the F-bomb shouting matches, and at some point we still want our Bachelor to have some decorum.

I did want to see Chris's feet held to the fire more about his ridiculousness. His antics took up the better part of two episodes but it was strangely given short-shrift. But the choir was cute, this time. I didn't like it on the first night.

I'm glad they rescued Grocer Joe from the First Night Rejects dump heap but he's good for Instagram shots with fangirls and that's about it.  Plus, he talks Chicago-ese, and I think Bachelor Nation would be plugging their ears by the end of night one with his 'these and those". (I can say this because I'm from Chicago.)

Jason for Bachelor! He's perfect. He has a real job (thus the competencies talk), socially-conscious-TV-ready family, we all know he's articulate and the greatest kisser ever. And, he can cry. Book him now, before some sweaty loser from Paradise breaks up with a C-list Bachelor cast off and tries to steal the crown. 

Those bloopers were great. I will always laugh when someone falls or a bug zaps one of them or they hit their head on low-hanging Restoration Hardware light fixtures. 

  • Love 19
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For all the crap travel they did this season, I am i sanely jealous they are doing the finale in the Maldives.  Holy crap that is amazig, and I think it is one of the best destinations they have ever done.  

Im not surprised I hated the MTA, the inter-guy drama this season was soooooo stupid, and Jordan was bolstered in his importance by his time in Paradise.  

I think Joe is too boring and nervous for the lead. Colton needs therapy for his stress about his virginity. Jason is just not good looking enough to be the lead, though he is more handsome than Flajnik. Wills is lovely, but i think the show would be afraid of having such a “peacock” as their first African American male lead. 

Venmo John gets my vote, or Blake if he doesnt win.  

  • Love 2
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11 hours ago, dbell1 said:

No to Jason, he was too smooth tonight, and his audition was annoying. "Tell me what to do." Oh shut up. Yes to his family, no to him.

Wills for Bachelor. Imagine the fashion. 

Yeah, once they start auditioning to be the Bachelor they lose me and Jason has been auditioning for a while now. Not interested in his level of phony.

I would love Wills for the fashion alone. I read Sharleen's blog and she does a fashion section and his would be epic!

But in reality, none of these guys is Bachelor material for me. (confession: I didn't watch this. Just came here to see if I missed anything. It doesn't seem I did so I'm glad I spent my two hours doing other things).

I think it's between Colton the virgin and Jason the campaigner (seriously, I haven't seen someone try this hard to be the lead since Tia.) I think TIIC are leaning toward Colton but fans are leaning towards Jason. Maybe they'll do the old Kaitlyn vs that pretty girl whose name I can't call up at the moment and let the contestants decide.

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1 hour ago, TheFinalRose said:

Plus, he talks Chicago-ese, and I think Bachelor Nation would be plugging their ears by the end of night one with his 'these and those".

I think you mean "deese and dose."

31 minutes ago, Mabinogia said:

But in reality, none of these guys is Bachelor material for me.

That's never stopped this show before!

  • Love 15
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I think it's quite obvious that Jason will he the next bachelor and no one else has a chance . I do really like him but he does seem to crave a lot of attention and talked to the audience way too much in between pushing out the tear . Also , I don't think he's on paradise and there's only 1 reason why . And I noticed he removed some gel from his hair . That was probably the requirement from producers lol

  • Love 17
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11 hours ago, atlanticslide said:

I can see the appeal of someone who doesn't come across as perfectly polished and camera-ready, but to me he seemed fumbling and awkward and almost seemed like he didn't really want to be there.

Some people find fumbling and awkward endearing! And seeming like you don't really wanna be there is pretty awesome for me lol. I didn't get that though. He just doesn't seem as attention hungry as most of the other guys. He seems more introverted and laid back. I can't see him as The Bachelor though for these reasons.

I am over all the guys that are potential Bachelor candidates (Jason, Wills, Colton). I'm glad I won't have to watch The Bachelor this time at least! Unless it's Blake, then I might have to tune in just to see how much more needy he can be. That boy really needs therapy!

  • Love 3
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10 hours ago, Flybutter said:

I think the dummy actually said “disingenuine.” In Bachelorland that gets you extra credit!

He might have said that in a previous episode but I could have sworn I heard him pronounce it correctly last night.  I still say the guy is a Bachelor genius. 

12 hours ago, chocolatine said:

Colton's like a very poor man's Tim Tebow.

Exactly!

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Colton as the Bachelor would be like Brad’s second season, with therapist in tow. Or if it wasn’t, it should be - he needs some help.

”Let’s put Jordan in the hot seat and talk about his golden underpants” ... as if that wasn’t what the entire previous part had been about. They should have either cut out the free-for-all or just put him directly into the hot seat and then we would have had time to, I don’t know, TALK TO LEO.

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Did Chris Harrison really start out the episode by calling this a shocking season of the Bachelorette???  I don't recall one shocking moment.  You managed to squeeze some entertainment from Jordon and virgin Colton but that's about it.  Not shocking.

God, I didn't watch last season of BiP and it looks like I won't be watching this one either.  It just looks awful and gross.

  • Love 5
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Token, I think Chris might possibly be referring to events that happened outside of the show proper:  the Garrett debacle, the Lincoln revelations and conviction, etc.

  • Love 6
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Wills is so much better-looking than any of these guys.  I don't care if he mumbles.  He's beautiful, confident, well-dressed, sexy, classy.  He's miles ahead of everyone else for me.


i-feel-like-im-taking-crazy-pills.gif?ss

26 minutes ago, Etta Place said:

They should have either cut out the free-for-all or just put him directly into the hot seat and then we would have had time to, I don’t know, TALK TO LEO.

I was very surprised Chris didn't make any time for him.  I thought Leo was a big hit with Bachelor Nation. 

  • Love 12
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I know the Men Tell All episodes are often auditions for the Bachelor, but this one just seemed blatantly so.  It just emphasised how boring this season really is, when the MTA episode is just dedicated to men auditioning for the next season.  For me, they all failed.  I don't want any of them to be the Bachelor.

  • Love 4
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(edited)

Agreed that Jason has been interviewing to be TB, but I actually think it goes farther.

Becca said several episodes ago that she wished he'd express himself more.  So why hadn't he expressed his "true feelings" before?  My opinion is because he never really felt deeply for her.  

I also think TPTB would love for Jason to be TB so they can optimize their exposure to his brother and further enhance ABC's stance on how open everyone is to "love for all".  

While I personally agree with Jason/Oprah (lol), and I am happy for his brother, I think TPTB view this as a field day for ABC.

Edited by Sterling
  • Love 9
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What further reason to want Jason than he speaks so well????

 

I am not sure if I am allowed to put this here, so please remove if not. I put it in media but thought not everyone reads over there.

I just listened to Afterbuzz....I love listening to them. Awesome that I have a job where it is a lot of computer work and I can listen while I work.
Christon was on and he is one awesome guy!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SQk1fduN51s

  • Love 3
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(edited)

Yeah, poor Leo - the only screen time he got was being shown getting hit in the face with a dodgeball in the blooper reel :(

Edited by jette
Spelling, duh!
  • Love 7
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Oh man, two moments I forgot about:

- Jean Blanc ensuring that he never gets a date again after referring to a woman as a bitch

- Chris Harrison, during the bloopers, telling those kids at the debate to stay in school because this (indicating the guys) is what happens when you don't stay in school.  That was the funniest moment of the show!

  • Love 10
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(edited)

I’m really disappointed in the lack of bedazzled t-shirts on the audience members. I only saw three “props” and they were obviously producer-made: a pro-Jordan and a pro-David sign made in coordinated sparkly paint, and a “male model” t-shirt that they made the one guy who showed up wear OVER his long-sleeve plaid button-down shirt. Come on! The audience t-shirts are the best part of the show! Just off the top of my head:

  • Wills you accept this rose?
  • Joe can squeeze my tomatoes 
  • Flat-earth, full heart
  • Audience member with professionality
  • Tinder match #4,001
  • Connor was framed
  • Venmo me your heart
  • Eu de Desperation

If I were in the audience, i’d show up wearing multiple shirts and strip them off for each commercial break! Amateurs! Bring some professionality! Damn!

Edited by JenE4
  • Love 23
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I gotta go with Jason for the next Bachelor. I think his intelligence alone is sexy as hell, but I could watch him kiss all day long. Plus, he's obviously a progressive thinker and when he quoted Oprah:  "Love is love is love," ... Whew! I was fanning myself. ?

  • Love 12
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5 hours ago, JudyObscure said:

Please show, let us have an entirely new bachelor -- someone with an impressive job, good looks, intelligent conversation and an air of maturity.

Wow, we're usually "lucky" to get one of the four as of late!

2 hours ago, Token said:

God, I didn't watch last season of BiP and it looks like I won't be watching this one either.  It just looks awful and gross

'Bachelor in Paradise - Awful and Gross' could be their tagline for the show. That pretty much sums it up. It's the summer's HEAVILY edited trainwreck you can't look away from. Can't wait!

  • Love 9
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11 hours ago, HappyDancex2 said:

I don’t think that Becca’s spouse should EVER. EVER. EVER. let her be “friends” with Jason.  Hard pass there buddy.

I don't think Becca's spouse should be choosing her friends for her.

Way too much Jordan tonight, I did enjoy the other models calling him out as basic and saying he wouldn't make it in NY. I hope he doesn't take over BiP as well, I have had enough of his schtick.

  • Love 15
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54 minutes ago, Cajungirl64 said:

I gotta go with Jason for the next Bachelor. I think his intelligence alone is sexy as hell, but I could watch him kiss all day long. Plus, he's obviously a progressive thinker and when he quoted Oprah:  "Love is love is love," ... Whew! I was fanning myself. ?

My my my! I declare...he is hawt!!!

  • Love 5
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6 hours ago, hyacinth said:

Here's why I still like Grocery Store Joe.    I can't imagine him conjuring up faux tears in a campaign to become the next Bachelor.    He didn't push himself into any conversations to get more face time.    He didn't demand that any of the guys apologize for something that he deemed offensive to himself and to the sanctity of the Bachelor Nation.    He isn't selling shit on Instagram.    He just seemed to be chilling and enjoying life.     

Also, his byline on his relatively new Twitter account says “[orange emoji] you glad I got a Twitter?”

  • Love 7
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I think that Colton was frustrated that Jason eclipsed him in the run for the Bachelor.  He was really demeaning towards Jordan and aggressive in his comments towards him.  He also has a scowl pretty much the whole time.  Jason, on the other hand, seemed very relaxed and confident-and he did not make any demeaning remarks about others.  In fact, at one point he did point out that Becca gave the gold shorts to Jordan.

Amazing how so many eliminated contestants wanted to somehow blame Jordan for their plight, or Jean Blanc.  Yeah, she just wasn't into you... Way too many of the men took themselves way too serious during this show.  

However, I was shocked that Becca said she wouldn't judge Colton for being a virgin.  What?  Why would anyone judge someone for being a virgin?  She almost made it sound like he committed a grave moral offense or something.  

So, is it just me, or was this the first "tell all" in which Chris Harrison did not ask the Bachelor/Bachelorette if they were in love/happy with their F1?  I may have missed it, but usually Chris asks them about the Final 2 and F1.  Makes me think something could be going on...

  • Love 16
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20 hours ago, dizzyd said:

I don't like that Colton seems to be getting the next Bachelor edit. 

I was feeling that with the Jason segments actually . . .

20 hours ago, Ohwell said:

Well, he did say "disrespectful" and "disingenuous" in the same sentence, so that immediately qualifies him because in Bachelorland he sounds like a genius.

He actually said 'disingenuine' which is decidedly NOT a word, so hold up on his Mensa membership. LOL

20 hours ago, Ohwell said:

Grocery Joe is handsome.  And funny too.  

Agreed. But it looks like he's on Paradise so I'll probably dislike him pretty soon.

  • Love 6
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29 minutes ago, seacliffsal said:

So, is it just me, or was this the first "tell all" in which Chris Harrison did not ask the Bachelor/Bachelorette if they were in love/happy with their F1?  I may have missed it, but usually Chris asks them about the Final 2 and F1.  Makes me think something could be going on...

I noticed that, too.  Interesting...

  • Love 1
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11 minutes ago, TomGirl said:

I noticed that, too.  Interesting...

They actually stopped asking the “are you in love/engaged?” question several years ago—sometime along the way when they realized either a) the person was not in love or b) the editors could play it like maybe they weren’t in love/engaged, so why “ruin” it by saying they did get engaged.

  • Love 2
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(edited)

Fawning over Jason because he has a gay brother!  That's NOT a diverse contestant!  A diverse contestant would be somebody picked for The Bachelor that ISN'T another straight, white man!  22 seasons people!  22 Seasons!   22 Seasons!  Jason having a gay brother is such FAKE diversity!!!  Yes, his brother is gay and Jason is very accepting of him blah blah blah but Jason HIMSELF is just like what the show has been doing since forever.

Edited by Ms Blue Jay
  • Love 9
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I like Grocery Store Joe, but the last time viewers fell for a contestant that they didn't know well was Juan Pablo, and we all know how that turned out.  I guess time in BIP will tell.

  • Love 6
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(edited)

I watched this season’s MTA after skipping all the previous episodes. Knowing nothing about these nitwits beyond what my meager memory retains from these boards, I am not impressed with the model and the virgin. I hope Chicago Joe will meet a nice Chicago girl and get off the future Bach radar. Maybe Jason would work. Definitely Wills, with a better haircut. Ben Higgins? Seriously, show?

Mostly the takeaway in the MML house is that these guys are zero fun. Watching their combative interactions over such a dull prize was torture, and I thank you all for sitting through the Boring Becca and her Nattering Ninnies show so you could entertain me with your posts. Even the bloopers were boring.

Edited by MakeMeLaugh
  • Love 5
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I'm really pleased for Grocery Store Joe! He seems sweet. I love his happy smile.

Unlike Sourpuss Colton. That was one sulky face, apart from when he was doing wounded birdie on the couch.

Jason did seem kind of like a politician - but he can articulate whole sentences.

As can Venmo John.

Golden Undies was adorable, as ever. I hope his career doesn't suffer over this dumb show.

Shows you what a boring bunch of duds boring Becca kept around that the bulk of the show was devoted to The Jordan Show, men bitching at each other, a handsome guy who was evicted night one, and a few fellows weeping silently.

It was not a stellar season, but that is no reason to consider for one millisecond bringing back that gruesome Ben Higgins. Ugh. Boring entitled mummy's boy milksop.

Jason, John, or Joe for the Bachelor!

  • Love 7
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3 hours ago, ChiMama said:

He actually said 'disingenuine' which is decidedly NOT a word, so hold up on his Mensa membership. LOL

Then I must have misheard because another poster also said that he said "disingenuine,"  but I could have sworn last night that Colton said it correctly.  Maybe I need to clean out my ears.   I know in a previous episode someone said "disingenuine" but I don't remember who it was.  

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3 hours ago, seacliffsal said:

So, is it just me, or was this the first "tell all" in which Chris Harrison did not ask the Bachelor/Bachelorette if they were in love/happy with their F1?  I may have missed it, but usually Chris asks them about the Final 2 and F1.  Makes me think something could be going on...

I noticed that too.

And in the info on my DVR for next week's show, it says it's a Finale with 1 hour interview in the studio with Becca, Blake, and Garrett.  

So, there is no "After The Final Rose" episode.

Maybe they're trying to throw everyone off, or maybe it was one of those finales where none of them worked out.

Edited by Sterling
  • Love 1
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I liked Grocer Joe. He looked like a young, super handsome Adam Carolla. I agree that maybe his endearing "regularness" might not translate to a turn at being The Bachelor. But I loved when Chris asked him how the experience was and Joe stared at him and said something like, "It was horrible! I went home right away!" instead of blah blah blahing about how it was a thrilling experience and he was pleased to have been even a small part of it, etc.

Edited by SHD
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3 minutes ago, Sterling said:

I noticed that too.

And in the info on my DVR for next week's show, it says it's a Finale with 1 hour interview in the studio with Becca, Blake, and Garrett.  

So, there is no "After The Final Rose" episode.

Maybe they're trying to throw everyone off, or maybe it was one of those finales where none of them worked out.

The one-hour interview is After the Final Rose. Now that you mention it, they’ve been calling it a three-hour live finale event for quite a while—ever since they’ve had a live studio audience there to provide somber sighs for the rejection and ecstatic cheers for the winner. They probably haven’t called it ATFR in quite some time but we just never noticed. Once a term becomes part of Bachelor lexicon, goddamned it, there’s no turning back! What’s next? A “marvelous quest”? A “misguided intention”? That’s not how this works. That’s not how any of this works!

  • Love 6
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4 hours ago, JenE4 said:

They actually stopped asking the “are you in love/engaged?” question several years ago—sometime along the way when they realized either a) the person was not in love or b) the editors could play it like maybe they weren’t in love/engaged, so why “ruin” it by saying they did get engaged.

I don't read spoilers or watch TV appearances, but more than once I heard Becca say, or I saw her write, that she was engaged.  I think it was in her first People.com blog.  

  • Love 1
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2 hours ago, Quickbeam said:

I’m only a casual watcher of the show but Grocery Joe was hot. And how cute was Jordan with side part, little boy hair? 

He looked like a cross of Dennis the menace and someone from Animal House movie, with a dash of that Silver Spoons kid.  But he’s not a hologram, or a skeleton of a man, so there’s that.  

  • Love 3
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Jason, dont change anything, your awesome the way you are! The worst I can say about Jason is his hair is gelled to the max and his reply's seem a bit scripted at times (but thats how it is with a lot of the guys), at least here. But, I dont care! Dude is smart, funny, well spoke, hot, and an amazing kisser apparently. He actually seemed like an adult, unlike so many of the other guys talking over each other, bickering like two year olds, and generally acting like a bunch of second graders misbehaving in class. 

Long live Joe the Grocer! He really seems so sincere, and like he isnt here for the attention or to launch another career, he just went onto the show because he thought it would be fun. Plus, he looked great this week! So glad to see him again, although I fear for him in Bachelor in Paradise. He seems too sweet for that sack of crazy. 

"The Earth isnt flat. I repeat, the Earth isnt flat." 

  • Love 9
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