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S14.E05: Take This Title and Run With It


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On 7/9/2018 at 9:51 PM, Aerobicidal said:

“Your favorite monster family is back.” For a moment, I was thinking Food Network had a new show with the Duggars cooking ranch dressing and Miracle Whip fantasies for a crowd. Maybe they could compete against each other. Jason Smith could judge. Lord honey, I would watch that faster than you could wrap my pineapple and call me a food novelist!

Wow, Amy, your attempts at humor would be dismissed by the writers of Fuller House as being neither funny nor edgy enough. That being said, she is still funnier and edgier than Guy Fieri, but that’s only as difficult as being funnier than Ayn Rand and edgier than a sphere.

Christian’s wardrobe by Old Navy children’s wear x Weekend at Bernie’s x eating Cheetos in an above ground pool is amazing. Whether or not he wins this prestigious series, he will wind up as a style icon just like William Hung became a musical icon.

Food Novelist™: “He’s from ancient Egypt and my grandma lives in Hong Kong.” I haven’t heard such a culturally authentic statement on Food Network since Sandra Lee referred to cilantro as “the parsley of the East” or stuck Corn Nuts on a Kwanzaa cake. In fact, Sandra Lee published a memoir and a novel so she’s already been there, done that, put it on a tablescape, and added a couple twenty shots of vodka depending on how much fun you want to have at your party.

I would watch a TV show called Ooey Gooey the day that Giada wears a Snuggie to judges’ table and Guy Fieri has an age-appropriate haircut and Hong Kong becomes a territory of Egypt. 

Having to hear the phrase “ooey gooey” 357 times in a six-minute period is giving me hives. Couldn’t they give it a more palatable title, like Slurping Moist Bulbous Jowl Pulp?

Ooey warming emulsions dripping over your gooey storytelling skills? Ooey gooey makes me smile and think of my children? I need to go drink a liter of ooey grappa to wash down my gooey Egyptian stacked snack which comes from my family's original Hong Kong recipe that my kids love eating with ooey rice at the most gooey sushi restaurant in The South.

^^^^^ That is without a doubt, some very poetic snark! Lol. Love it!

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Ooey Gooey is the stupidest name for a food/cooking show. Ever. But you watch, it will be on the lineup at some point in the future.

I watched the rerun today since I snoozed through the first airing, and it’s hot as hell outside so I am staying indoors. I just don’t like any of these people. Palak’s vocal fry makes me want to smack her, the southern belle is working my last good nerve, and Christian needs to get some clothes on that don’t look like he dug them out of a dumpster behind the Salvation Army. I don’t remember a thing Manny said, he is too forgettable and so far I cannot tell you what the culinary style is of anyone.

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I don't like any of these people either. And I can't cook to save my life so usually I find something about one or two of the contestants that keeps me interested whether it's their personality or their cooking talents. But this seasons cooking people....so boring and uninspiring. I'm watching the new episode now and I'm about to switch over to the I.D. Channel! 

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22 minutes ago, Sew Sumi said:

@Whimsy I know this show sucks; have you stopped making episode threads so we can kvetch?

 

Lol. No. I always make them the day of. Almost forgot, but I’m making it now. 

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