S14.E01: Week 1: Season Premiere

[OnceSane]

Quote

Former bachelorettes Rachel, JoJo and Kaitlyn help Becca prepare for her big night; the men try to make a good impression on Becca; 21 bachelors advance to the next stage.

[saber5055]

This is just starting and I realize how much I need this cheesy, corny and yes, fun show in my life right now. Looking forward to a hot-guy-filled season. I'm staying unspoiled with plans to just enjoy the scenery.

[b2H]

I love how Kaitlyn got the short shrift in the girls’ time.  She is still trying to work her way back in and she has gone a long way in getting some airtime this season.   But she got next to no face time, dominated by Rachel and JoJo who played by the rules on their seasons.

Kaitlyn has a long haul ahead of her if she is expecting ABC will relent and pay for her wedding.

[saber5055]

LOL! I can't tell JoJo and Kaitlyn apart, and for the life of me, I can't remember who any of them are engaged to, including Rachel. In one side of my brain, out the other. I love the bachelor intro packages. I need to take notes since a couple are already on my "Send Home" list and they aren't even at the mansion yet.

[b2H]

2 minutes ago, saber5055 said:

I need to take notes since a couple are already on my "Send Home" list and they aren't even at the mansion yet.

Not the cystic fibrosis guy.  What an excellent individual!!!!

[Ohwell]

Becca is so lame it's going to be hard to watch the whole season of her, so I'm just going to watch the eye candy tonight and be done with it.

[saber5055]

1 minute ago, b2H said:

Not the cystic fibrosis guy.  What an excellent individual!!!!

Oh, yes. Colton. He was on my KEEP list just from his CF work, then he picked up his old dog and melted my cold black heart. He is now on my Top One list. And I haven't seen everyone yet!

2 minutes ago, Ohwell said:

Becca is so lame it's going to be hard to watch the whole season of her, so I'm just going to watch the eye candy tonight and be done with it.

Eye candy and travel porn = All The Right Reasons to watch.

[Ohwell]

5 minutes ago, saber5055 said:

Eye candy and travel porn = All The Right Reasons to watch.

But now she's even got the guys saying "let's do the damn thing!"  I can't take that.  Nope nope nope.

[AllyCat]

35 minute in to episode 1, and if I hear “Let’s do the damn thing” one more time, I’m going to get stabby. Bring back “amazing”, I can handle that all day long.

[saber5055]

How about a "do the damn thing" drinking game maybe? I know after a couple episodes I'm going to start hating everyone so I'm trying to "keep the glow" going for at least tonight. Although I am wishing for an open bottle of wine right now.

[b2H]

5 minutes ago, Ohwell said:

But now she's even got the guys saying "let's do the damn thing!"  I can't take that.  Nope nope nope.

In French, no less......

[EllenB]

What the hell is a "social media participant"?  Lives in his parents' basement and doesn't work, just stays online?  Oy.

Lots of shallowness so far. 

[b2H]

Then there is the banjoist.

[Ohwell]

I'm sick of seeing guys in too tight hipster suits with the brown shoes.  This fashion trend can't end soon enough.

I like Colton the CF foundation the best.  I suspect he's too young for Becca but that's fine because I think he can do better than her lame ass.  I hope he stays long enough to get some publicity for his foundation though.   

[saber5055]

3 minutes ago, Ohwell said:

I'm sick of seeing guys in too tight hipster suits with the brown shoes.  This fashion trend can't end soon enough.

I'm with you. Makes me remember Ali's sweaty Rub-er-toe in his tiny suit, he could barely move. Now everyone dresses like that. It has to be miserable. I suspect TPTB will keep the model around for his THs and haute couture (cough) snark.

Other shows were making fun of the "occupations" well before tonight. I guess I'm blessed in that my old tv is square so I can't read any of the names, occupations or home towns.

[Crankybroad]

Connor reminds me of Jojo's guy Jordan. 

[saber5055]

1 minute ago, Crankybroad said:

Connor reminds me of Jojo's guy Jordan. 

Nooooo! (Ha ha) I hope that's in looks only, not personality. Jordan was fairly good looking.

When the basketball guy got out of the limo, I thought, "He looks like Michael Jordan." Then he turns out to be a Globetrotter. Yowza!

[Ohwell]

I know there has to be a (probably producer driven) shit-stirrer every season, but  I hope the guys enjoy their stay.  Eat, drink, travel, and be merry!

[saber5055]

The chicken guy actually is pretty cute. I hope I can recognize him when he takes his feathers off. (Molts)

Will model guy be this season's villain? Maybe it's too early to tell. But so far he wins my "The date I would walk out on after five minutes" award.

[Bnwcat]

Re: “here for the wrong reasons” guy

I didn’t like how the accused guy started to say something about “you know how women are dude “ when confronted. That and the “not really an ex, we were just dating for a month” made me skeptical.

[saber5055]

Which guy is First Rose Garrett? He arrived in a van? Did he have an interesting entrance? Someone help me out. I watched all the entrances and don't even remember a Garrett. I feel like the entrances after the first few got the speed treatment.

Edited May 29, 2018 by saber5055

[Mswldflwr]

Yes, Garrett was minivan guy.

[TomGirl]

Is it just me, or is this the lamest group of guys ever??  No eye candy in this group IMHO.

[Armchair Critic]

I know the model guy was joking (sort of) but I was hoping chicken guy would get a rose and the model wouldn't.

[Ms Blue Jay]

The blonde Jordan guy reminds me of Schmidt's character on New Girl.

[saber5055]

I missed Garrett's entrance in the minivan, so I looked him up and he's the fly fishing guy from Reno. I liked him (and Colton) in the intro packages and thought I would be a good match for him. So yeah, I agree with Becca's First Impression Rose.

I guess we can end the season now. But wait! Previews show this is going to be The Most Dramatic Season EVAH! Who knew?

[JenE4]

Welcome back, gang! Let’s do the damn thing! Wherein the damn thing that we do is be Here for the Wrong Reasons for an amazing, snarky journey.

Ok, but some Right Reasons picks... Yay, Clay! Boo, Garrett. That’s a no from me, Jordan. Heyy, Lincoln! Produce Joe is like a bruised tomato. This cologne guy smells like bad news to me. Colton, why are we finding about your sob stories already?? Save it for your first date! Oh, no, the coming ups have a guy saying he “literally died.” You did NOT, sir! Get your literally living ass back in that hearse and turn it right around!

Colton is cute. I think he’ll go far. Ok, the cologne guy won her over with “Let’s do the damn thing” in French, but then the next guy does a “Let’s do the damn thing” proposal. John, you shouldn’t have mentioned grandma. Leo the lion with that mane. I’m confused by the jumpsuit lawyer. Man bun Mike with the Arie cutout?? Minivan Garrett—still don’t like this guy, especially since she thinks he might sincerely want a family and the minivan is a hilarious joke to him. Lincoln comes with cake and a sexy accent: check and check! Kamil a “social media participant”—unfollow! “Beccaw! Beccaw!” OMG, this guy actually made me laugh. Not the first chicken suit, but first funny chicken suit guy.

The guy with the grandma created Venmo?? Ok, he gets some extra points. A Harlem Globe Trotter??? This guy is even better! 

This show “The Proposal” has people “Here for the REAL Reason.” Hmmm. This is treading near trademark infringement.

“Venture capitalist/chicken” is the best job title in Bachelor History. I think this guy is my top pick, along with Lincoln so far.

Ooooooooh! A Wrong Reasons accusation already?!?!?!?!? Danny Wood from NKOTB has dirt on Chase! Hmm. Did Chase date Danielle for “two weeks” or “two months”?? Get your story straight, Chase! Now it’s “a month.” But if this was 2 years ago, Danielle is weasling her way into the spotlight—as is this other guy from The Christmas Party...and many other times, apparently. Jake went through a transformative year and Christmas Party Jake was a whole new man from pre-Christmas Party Jake, much like The Grinch. 

A guard and protect your heart tattoo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (TM Kasey on Ali’s season) This season has everything—and it’s only night one!

Garrett? Booooooo! I am not about Garrett. But, again, she doesn’t see that he’s making fun of minivans—not that he actually wants one. But all the previous ‘ettes told us their fiancés also got their FIR, so I guess I’ll continue to look for reasons to hate him all season since he got my anti-FIR: last-impression rose? Worst-impression rose? Jordan is the only one who’s worse with all of these talking heads about how he’s a model. Shut UP!

LOTS of Wrong Reasons accusations coming up this journey!! Huzzah!!

[FlyingEgret]

44 minutes ago, saber5055 said:

The chicken guy actually is pretty cute. I hope I can recognize him when he takes his feathers off. (Molts)

Will model guy be this season's villain? Maybe it's too early to tell. But so far he wins my "The date I would walk out on after five minutes" award.

Totally agree with you - I can't imagine even a 5 minute date with Jordan - but I was laughing at his THs...

[TiredMe]

Im a big kid at heart and love the Globetrotters so I was happy she kept that guy.

so first impression is front runner is Garret? The mini van entrance was lame and I honestly thought he was one of the least attractive dudes there. 

I laughed when the girls set off the smoke detector trying to burn sage (or doob per Kaitlyn lol)

[shouldbedancing]

She got more quality black guys than Rachel did. Guess they learned from their mistakes.

[saber5055]

4 minutes ago, JenE4 said:

Welcome back, gang! Let’s do the damn thing! Wherein the damn thing that we do is be Here for the Wrong Reasons for an amazing, snarky journey.

JenE4, this made me literally LOL. (Thank goodness it did not make me literally die like Hearse Guy.) I hope this journey is full of snark and eye candy. Pickings look slim so far, but maybe they will start looking better as the weeks go on and I can actually recognize some of them and figure out their names. Interesting that most of the men are dark haired.

[nutty1]

1 hour ago, Crankybroad said:

Connor reminds me of Jojo's guy Jordan. 

I told my friend the exact same thing!!

Typical preview....fun, drama, tears, an ambulance and in love with 2 guys!!

Edited May 29, 2018 by nutty1

[saber5055]

1 hour ago, AllyCat said:

35 minute in to episode 1, and if I hear “Let’s do the damn thing” one more time, I’m going to get stabby.

Someone take away all of Allycat's knives. I hope it's not too late ...

[Ripley68]

Did you know she was completely blindsided by Arie?

Looks like everyone's favorite is Colton, gotta agree, but he was young.  I liked Joe, but could tell she wasn't in to him.  Stuntman is HOT, but he's not staying long.  I liked Chris with the choir until he stirred drama.  Liked Christon (globetrotter).  Liked Clay at first, but not later.  She seems into Blake and Garrett, pick Garrett over the two.  Liked Harry Potter dude, but cam't remember his name.  Model man is definitely the producer plant.

[jackjill89]

Where did "Let's do the damn thing" come from anyway? Did Becca say it on ATFR or something or is it some marketing person's invention? I'm so over it. You can't make a catchphrase a catchphrase. It's supposed to happen organically.

Did you know that Jordan is a model? A fashion model? He takes himself so seriously, it is comic gold. He can stay for his TH, but I really don't want any stupid drama from him. 

Hated Garrett from his Reno package, but he grew on me a bit. Blake does seem like a nice guy. Colton is adorable. French-speaking Cologne Guy is very good looking. He would either smell great or be cloying. I'll watch. Wrong reasons or right, this stupid show is fun and I get sucked in every time. I like Becca. Hope she finds a nice guy and walks off into the sunset. 

The stuntman looked like Rollo from Vikings :) He needs to be clad in Viking garb and then he'd be really hot :)

Edited May 29, 2018 by jackjill89

[rebel2u]

Jordan, the self-described "ridiculously handsome" model, is reality tv gold.  He says such stupid things with great seriousness.  He'll keep me happy for days.

[chocolatine]

I was impressed with how unapologetic Becca was giving Jake the boot. I'm still not completely sold on her, but if she keeps being no-nonsense like that, I might come around.

33 minutes ago, TomGirl said:

Is it just me, or is this the lamest group of guys ever??  No eye candy in this group IMHO.

Nobody has made a very strong first impression on me (except maybe the ex-footballer with the CF charity), but I thought there were a couple of cute ones, most notably the Seattle banker and the electrician (the latter didn't get a rose).

22 minutes ago, JenE4 said:

This cologne guy smells like bad news to me.

He comes off too materialistic for my liking, and I'm violently allergic to fragrance, but I did like his shoutout to Haiti not being a "shithole country".

24 minutes ago, JenE4 said:

The guy with the grandma created Venmo?? Ok, he gets some extra points.

No. He said he created "the app for Venmo", which means just the mobile frontend, not the core application, and he didn't do it by himself, but as part of a team.

[adhoc]

• Geez, someone tell Fabio-Light that the 1980s called and wants its hair back.  I found him not hot at all.
• Grocer Joe was cute--I think even with just one night of exposure on this show (and possibly a bit more on BiP, since that only requires a couple of weeks of filming), he'll be hearing from plenty of eligible ladies.
• I really liked the lawyer guy (came in the race car driver's outfit). I guess he's gone now? :-(
• Is it me or did a couple of the guys Becca really liked kind of look like her ex (whom we saw on Arie's season)? I think she has a type.
• Glad to see a good number of well-turned out black suitors. I like the diversity, plus it gives us a better chance to have a black bachelor down the road, since the show tends to pick the next lead from its pool of previous contestants. 
• When Colton said "I run a non-profit for cystic fibrosis", I half expected Becca to say "Well, being on this show is a great way to promote your charity, now, isn't it?" Because TBH, that's the first thing I thought when he said it.
• Lack of socks would be a deal breaker for me.
• Kamil is totally blindsided by Becca's letting him go. Gee, it couldn't possibly have anything to do with your telling her that in your relationship, it would not be a 50/50 relationship but a 60/40 relationship, could it? (And to be clear, she's the one who would get 40% out of the deal, while he got 60%.) Yep, Kamil, her rejection of you is quite a stumper.

Edited May 29, 2018 by adhoc

[ECM1231]

3 minutes ago, chocolatine said:

I was impressed with how unapologetic Becca was giving Jake the boot. I'm still not completely sold on her, but if she keeps being no-nonsense like that, I might come around.

Nobody has made a very strong first impression on me (except maybe the ex-footballer with the CF charity), but I thought there were a couple of cute ones, most notably the Seattle banker and the electrician (the latter didn't get a rose).

He comes off too materialistic for my liking, and I'm violently allergic to fragrance, but I did like his shoutout to Haiti not being a "shithole country".

No. He said he created "the app for Venmo", which means just the mobile frontend, not the core application, and he didn't do it by himself, but as part of a team.

Thanks for clarifying. I thought damn, that guy is worth big ?; what is he doing on this craptastic show?

[srpturtle80]

14 minutes ago, jackjill89 said:

Where did "Let's do the damn thing" come from anyway? Did Becca say it on ATFR or something or is it some marketing person's invention? I'm so over it. You can't make a catchphrase a catchphrase. It's supposed to happen organically.

She said it when she met Arie. And now it just. will. not. die. 

[chocolatine]

1 minute ago, ECM1231 said:

Thanks for clarifying. I thought damn, that guy is worth big ?; what is he doing on this craptastic show?

You wouldn't believe how many people in tech try to take sole credit for something that took a large team of people to build.

[legaleagle53]

Apparently Grocery Store Joe is a fan favorite -- some people on Twitter are already calling for him to be the next Bachelor after he's spent a stint in Paradise!

[ECM1231]

52 minutes ago, saber5055 said:

Which guy is First Rose Garrett? He arrived in a van? Did he have an interesting entrance? Someone help me out. I watched all the entrances and don't even remember a Garrett. I feel like the entrances after the first few got the speed treatment.

Garrett also had an intro package showing him fishing? Outdoors in Reno. He did a weird impression I did not recognize. Was told it was supposed to be Chris Farley.

[Ms Blue Jay]

10 minutes ago, legaleagle53 said:

Apparently Grocery Store Joe is a fan favorite -- some people on Twitter are already calling for him to be the next Bachelor after he's spent a stint in Paradise!

He was talking like a tall Joe Pesci

[yorklee2]

I thought Becca looked lovely in her gown and seemed real at ease. I know it's first night but I wasn't terribly impressed with any of these guys. Some observations:

Garrett really brought it. Most at ease and confident. Smooth move to get Becca physically close (without being too cheesy and gross) with the fly fishing demonstration. And in Becca's words she's "smitten" already. He's going to be one to watch.

Kamil with the female Camille pronunciation bombed majorly with the meet me 60/40 bizarre game out of the limo. And those snickers with a suit? Learn how to dress dude.

I thought for sure Chris the tattle tale would be gone along with the loser he tattled on. I would have sent him home as well. He's not that attractive to me.

Blake reminds me of a young Jack Palance. He may be a great guy but he's another one I don't find particularly attractive. 

Can't decide which one is going to be the villain at this point. Leo or Jordan maybe? Leo was making a lot of snarky observations. As was Jordan. Although Jordan could be the designated crazy one as well with his self love (did he really call himself eye candy?) and ditzy observations.

Well here we go with another season. Hope it's better than the last one. Of course it won't take much to surpass that.

Edited May 29, 2018 by yorklee2

[Ms Blue Jay]

24 minutes ago, chocolatine said:

I was impressed with how unapologetic Becca was giving Jake the boot. I'm still not completely sold on her, but if she keeps being no-nonsense like that, I might come around.

That's when she won me over also.

I also liked how randy she acted around the guy with all that hair.  She was really into it and said "Can I touch it?"  LOL I just loved the attitude.

Edited May 29, 2018 by Ms Blue Jay

[adhoc]

Oh, I forgot to mention another guy I got a good vibe from--Jason with the slicked back hair. He's not the handsomest guy in the bunch, but I liked his energy and he seemed--nice. 

[Ms Blue Jay]

16 minutes ago, ECM1231 said:

Garrett also had an intro package showing him fishing? Outdoors in Reno. He did a weird impression I did not recognize. Was told it was supposed to be Chris Farley.

If so, there's a famous character on SNL that Chris Farley did, Matt Foley (?), some unemployed guy who liked to give people motivational speeches and his famous catchphrase was "I live in a VANNNN..... down by the RIVER!"

But I didn't catch the actual imitation and this is all just me going on assumptions from your post, and my TV nerddom.

Edited May 29, 2018 by Ms Blue Jay

[yorklee2]

1 hour ago, TomGirl said:

Is it just me, or is this the lamest group of guys ever??  No eye candy in this group IMHO.

No it's not just you. Underwhelming to say the least. 

[nutty1]

Leo isn’t my type but I thought he was funny. 

I liked Colton, Clay and Blake. A few more too, but cannot remember their names. 

There are some OK guys this season. 

I loved Becca’s dress and also that her makeup wasn’t overdone. 

The girls’ group chat was cute. I really like JoJo more than I ever did when she was the lead. Guessing they still don’t care too much for Kaitlyn. We heard her say one thing.