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Season One Talk

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1 minute ago, voiceover said:

From his funeral garb, I assumed Nandor was Russian Orthodox (so Christianity-aversion would apply).  I haven't seen all the shows -- did he mention being a Muslim before?

In a previous episode, Nandor said he was from Al Que-something, a country that dissolved in 1401, and is now part of Iran. 

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I'm really going to miss this show while it's on hiatus, it's definitely been the little surprise gem of the season. Nandor sad about his 35 wives leaving him because he really did love 33 of them, LOL. Guillermo finding out he's part Van Helsing and staking all the portraits. The whole church scene of them burning and Guillermo throwing holy water on Nandor. OMG, I loved the whole thing. I loved the return of Jeff and that Nadja can't ever remember his name. I'm just sorry he's lost his head (again) because I adore Jake McDorman.

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I too am totally bummed about the season finale. 

"People love pinatas.  Someone's got to breed those colorful donkeys."

Oh hell Gizmo is 1% vampire slayer?!  Laszlo better watch out; I predict he's going to suffer Guillermo's wrath first.  I was sure Laszlo was a gonner when he was yelling about those wooden stakes.  Who knew you could order those from Amazon.  "Well you better drive back to the Amazon and return them!"

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On 5/17/2019 at 4:09 PM, Portia said:

Since Guillermo is clearly disgruntled and has a talent for killing, I predict he will eventually become a vampire slayer. 

Score one for Portia!

 

On 5/19/2019 at 12:11 AM, CletusMusashi said:

It is, at least as importantly, the actors' commitment to consistently spectacular delivery of funny fucking vampire/goth goofiness.

Matt Berry could read the instructions on how to assemble a television stand and I would pee my pants laughing.  

For example, Get in your car and take those back to the Amazon!

Also, IT Crowd call back "Apriiiiil"  

Also also, I thought you said you were from Iran

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2 hours ago, kariyaki said:

In a previous episode, Nandor said he was from Al Que-something, a country that dissolved in 1401, and is now part of Iran. 

There's Russian Orthodox in Iran (many diff religions, currently persecuted)and since his portrayer has a Persian name (I squee'd!!! Hilarious that they made that part of his background!! I remember thinking during the credits: "Wow, the only Kayvans I know are Iranian"), and the character wore the garb to the funeral (the hat tipped me off), I'm still gonna assume.

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To be honest, I didn't think the finale was one of the season's better episodes. It had plenty of fun moments (as all the episodes do), but I kind of wish the episode with the vampire council had been the finale. It was far more memorable, and it was strange how they never followed up on it.

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I agree about the lack of continuity. I thought episodes 2 and 3 were actually the weakest and then they rebounded after that. It's going to be hard for them to top the one with the vampire council with all those amazing guest stars. Might have to "settle" for A- and B+ episodes in comparison. I'm more than willing. It's fun and there's always a good laugh even when it's not the strongest.

The absurd irony is that a vampire can be about 900 years old and still have no concept that floating up to a fifth floor window and tapping on the glass would be considered disturbing by the occupant. Oh, Nandor.

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I laughed when they brought up the the part about Nandor's semen, and kept laughing when Nadja kept harping on about the witches coming back for more when they find out how fertile he is.

I'm surprised the vampires could stand being in a church for that long.  I laughed when Guillermo revealed how he delayed the funeral.

Guillermo is a psychopath!  He's been doing the wetwork for vampires for so long, it wouldn't be hard to turn into a heartless vampire slayer.

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7 hours ago, HotRats2112 said:

Score one for Portia!

Hooray for me!!! ::takes a bow::

Godammit,  the show stole a joke of mine!  Because I'm so very fair, I was completely unsurprised that my DNA test showed nothing but German and British ancestry. I have often joked that my results simply read "one thousand percent white."

What an unexpected delight this series has been thus far. I don't know how they did it, but they truly exceeded my expectations. 

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12 hours ago, voiceover said:

From his funeral garb, I assumed Nandor was Russian Orthodox (so Christianity-aversion would apply).  I haven't seen all the shows -- did he mention being a Muslim before?

Russian Orthodox don’t have harems. Nandor also mentioned that he was an Ottoman warrior, and, in some of those credit pix, he is wearing a turban.

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If Nandor was Muslim in life, which seems most probable, the Orthodox garb might just be him imitating the Christians of his era. But nowadays I'm pretty sure that if the main three had to declare a religion, they'd check "Vampire." Colin, of course, could simply check "none." But he wouldn't. Because he could have way more energy-draining fun if he answered the question with a long rambling monologue about his philosophical journey to define which particular micro-nuance of "not religious" he is, and why nowadays he has eventually concluded that he is a pandeist, or apatheist, or whatever the hell he ends up telling his victim by the time they pass out.

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22 hours ago, LittleIggy said:

Russian Orthodox don’t have harems. Nandor also mentioned that he was an Ottoman warrior, and, in some of those credit pix, he is wearing a turban.

He lived a lot of different lives.  Plus: Vampire.  So, you know, ***logic need not apply.

For all we know he snacked on a follower and kept the outfit.  That sounds as logical as anything else.

 

I think I've read the whole thread, so sorry if I missed this, but --

Loving the salutes to vamps-who-came-before, esp Nandor's homage to the scariest moment in 1922's Nosferatu:

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I haven't laughed at a show in along time like this one.  The scene in the church with the vamps burning had me cracking up,

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Those obviously domestic rats always take me out of the moment. Even if they just stuck with all-white ones I could pretend they were some inbred catacomb-dwelling strain of albinos. But hooded rats? Those guys have "bred for aesthetic human appeal" written all over them. Still not the worst rat-casting ever, though. 

How does that even happen?

"Duh, sorry, boss. We couldn't find any rats."

"How about mice? We could use mice and turn the zoom lens on 'em."

"No mice either."

"So what have we got?"

"Well, I do always have a car trunk full of random armadillos. You never know when a bunch of random armadillos might come in handy. Should we use armadillos?"

"Sure, why not? If anybody asks, we'll just say they're Transylvanian armadillos."

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11 hours ago, voiceover said:

He lived a lot of different lives.  Plus: Vampire.  So, you know, ***logic need not apply.

For all we know he snacked on a follower and kept the outfit.  That sounds as logical as anything else.

Or he was Muslim.

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He lived a lot of different lives.  Plus: Vampire.  So, you know, ***logic need not apply.

He had 35 wives before he became a vampire. (They left him because he became a vampire.) I don't know what that means in terms of culture or religion. In truth, I doubt very much the show is trying to indicate any specific religion other than "old world." As noted, there isn't much in vampire lore regarding formerly Muslim vampires and the effects a Christian church would have on them. Instead, the show just likes playing with tropes even if they're contradictory. If it's funny, they're going to go for it.

I tried looking up that "country" he supposedly ruled (Al Kanaaaada?) and couldn't find a match so I'm guessing that was more or less fictional as well.

Good read on Nandor.

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I believe I found a logical error. Nandor asked Guillermo if he had receive another jury summons.  Since he's not a citizen, he can't be on a jury.  Even if he had received them in the past by mistake, answering "not a citizen" would work better than "I'm dead."

I do wonder how Nandor (and probably the other two "normal" vampires) can remain in the country legally. Do they have very old green cards?  If you apply for citizenship and fail, does that trigger an investigation of your immigration status?

And where does the money come from for Guillermo's lunch, Amazon shopping, real estate taxes, etc., even if Guillermo does not receive a salary?  Have they made good investments?  Are they all living off Colin Robinson's salary?

Edited by ItCouldBeWorse
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Did they have green cards back when they made the boat trip over to NYC? I'd assume hypnosis would explain away any logistical difficulties they might have experienced with their residence.

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55 minutes ago, ItCouldBeWorse said:

I believe I found a logical error. Nandor asked Guillermo if he had receive another jury summons.  Since he's not a citizen, he can't be on a jury.  Even if he had received them in the past by mistake, answering "not a citizen" would work better than "I'm dead."

I do wonder how Nandor (and probably the other two "normal vampires") can remain in the country legally. Do they have very old green cards?  If you apply for citizenship and fail, does that trigger an investigation of your immigration status?

And where does the money come from for Guillermo's lunch, Amazon shopping, real estate taxes, etc., even if Guillermo does not receive a salary?  Have they made good investments?  Are they all living off Colin Robinson's salary?

I had caught the citizenship thing as well. Not only is Nandor not a citizen, I know in my state (Virginia) you have to be a registered voter in order to be called for jury duty. I don't know if this is standard in every state so YMMV. I understand it would be rather easy for someone to register to vote if they have a legal driver's license, but since we've never seen Nandor driving, that eliminates that possibility.

And yes, I've wondered how Guillermo is paying for everything when he apparently doesn't make any money. As for bill paying, this deleted scene from the movie may help out:

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On 5/30/2019 at 11:59 AM, voiceover said:

I assumed Nandor was Russian Orthodox

In Citizenship epi he said he was from Iran, didn't he? 

33 minutes ago, vadare said:

As for bill paying, this deleted scene from the movie may help out:

 

This would almost make becoming a vampire TOTALLY WORTH IT!!!  Yes you will sell me this new Mercedes for the change I have in my wallet. Thank you very much. 

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17 minutes ago, LittleIggy said:

Wonder how long our favorite vampires have been in the New World? 🧐

I think they came here in the late 1800s or early 1900s. Pretty sure it was mentioned in an episode.

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I caught the bit about jury duty from the promo spots and the preview last week. Again, consistency isn't this show's friend. They just did an episode about Nando trying to become an American citizen. It strikes me as rather sloppy writing but they're just always going for the joke. I guess they can get away with it because the premise itself is so absurd it's like a live-action cartoon. 

And yes, I've wondered how they can pay for things when nobody seems to work but I guess you can hypnotize people over the phone! Except, wouldn't those poor saps who work customer service have no souls like government workers?

Although, we found out in that episode where Nando was trying to rescue Lazlo from the animal shelter that he wasn't very good at hypnotizing, so maybe he's always just coming up with excuses why his hypnotism isn't working. That in itself could be a running gag.

Edited by iMonrey
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It's very possible that at some point there was something in the mail that Gizmo did not want to show Nandor. Perhaps it was a flyer advertising all the Familiar-training benefits of Camp Renfield. If you're taking a second to read something addressed to your master, and then realize it's not something you want to tell him about, then the best strategy is to escape quickly with an easy simple lie. Especially with Nandor.

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7 hours ago, Gobi said:

I think they came here in the late 1800s or early 1900s. Pretty sure it was mentioned in an episode.

It was--in the pilot episode Laszlo says he and Nadja have lived in the U.S. since 1861. I assume that includes Nandor.

As for how Guillermo has any money, my theory is he mostly gets it from whatever cash or valuables the people he lures to the vampires have on them when he disposes the bodies (it's probably like that for all the other familiars). To paraphrase Brenda from Scary Movie, he already got them killed, might as well rob their asses. I also assume Colin pays for Nandor, Lazslo and Nadja's rent, it would explain why they keep him around despite being an energy-sucking nuisance. One thing that bugs me is whether or not the Vampiric Council have ever figured out that our three vampires aren't dead.

Guillermo is so close to snapping like a twig, I'm kinda bummed we have to wait until next season to see it happen. Maybe it'll be revealed that his family has secretly been slaying vampires for generations since Van Helsing, and he's just the latest generation with "the gift." Nandor better sleep with one eye open. 😉

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On 5/30/2019 at 10:13 AM, vadare said:

I don't have cable/dish, so I record it at a fiend's house and catch up on it when I go over and now he's watching it, too. He's very blasé about life so he'll tell me, "It's okay," but he keeps watching it, so I guess that's something.

 

Seems appropriate!  I so love this show; I laughed so hard at Gregor/Jeff's unfortunate (yet so predictable) demise.  I wonder if the ravens flocking outside the house means the Vampire Council will be back next season?  And you go, Guillermo!  First go after the Mana-Hatta crew of mean vampires, though, okay?

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Did Nadja's inability/refusal to say the name "Jeff" remind anyone else of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt? They did the same joke with the same name, when Titus kept acting like he couldn't remember the name of his ex's new boyfriend, and called him things like "Jorp."

I have to think it's either a strange coincidence or an homage.

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On 5/31/2019 at 12:25 PM, ItCouldBeWorse said:

I believe I found a logical error. Nandor asked Guillermo if he had receive another jury summons.  Since he's not a citizen, he can't be on a jury.  Even if he had received them in the past by mistake, answering "not a citizen" would work better than "I'm dead."

I do wonder how Nandor (and probably the other two "normal" vampires) can remain in the country legally. Do they have very old green cards?  If you apply for citizenship and fail, does that trigger an investigation of your immigration status?

And where does the money come from for Guillermo's lunch, Amazon shopping, real estate taxes, etc., even if Guillermo does not receive a salary?  Have they made good investments?  Are they all living off Colin Robinson's salary?

Only U.S. citizens can vote or serve on a jury, however, a jury summons can be sent to anyone registered at an address, usually by your voter registration but also from DMV records. So yes, Nandor could have just marked the box saying “Not a citizen”. The entire episode of Nandor going for his citizenship was completely not how it works in real life but it was still hilarious. This is a comedy about centuries-old vampires —  creatures that don’t actually exist (well, except for energy vampires like Colin). I don’t expect it to be perfectly logical or even 100% consistent. Breaking those rules allows it to be even funnier. 

 

On 5/31/2019 at 1:12 PM, Bruinsfan said:

Did they have green cards back when they made the boat trip over to NYC? I'd assume hypnosis would explain away any logistical difficulties they might have experienced with their residence.

I loved Gregor-Jesk and was so bummed that he got decapitated (again). A favorite scene of mine was when we learned that he really was Nadja’s reincarnated lover, not just some modern guy who looked sorta like her Gregor. 

Edited by RedHawk · Reason: Clarify jury summons info
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Jury summons have been sent to children and pets, so it's entirely possible Nandor mistakenly got one.

Except for the revelation of Guillermo's heritage, I agree this didn't really come off like a season finale. Nothing about Jenna either. She could move into the house next season, which will have Guillermo seething with jealousy. Or, I'd like to see Lazlo and Nadya get their own familiar. He/she and Guillermo could get into a competition over who can be the best one.

If they've lived in that house for over 100 years they probably own it outright and only have to worry about property taxes and utilities.

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22 hours ago, RedHawk said:

This is a comedy about centuries-old vampires —  creatures that don’t actually exist (well, except for energy vampires like Colin). I don’t expect it to be perfectly logical or even 100% consistent. Breaking those rules allows it to be even funnier. 

That really is true. Most vampire shows, and I watch them all, try to establish rules but they always end up breaking them for plot reasons. When they do it on this show it's funny rather than annoying.

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4 hours ago, Vermicious Knid said:

I'd like to see Lazlo and Nadya get their own familiar. He/she and Guillermo could get into a competition over who can be the best one.

Lazlo and Nadja had several familiars over the season. The Baron ate one. A heavy bookshelf crushed another one. They don’t have good luck with them, apparently.

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So Guillermo just randomly decides to have DNA tests run on his boss and his boss’s friends?  Who the hell decides to invade people’s privacy like that? Of all the weird and creepy goings on, that’s just going a little too far. 

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7 hours ago, Ceindreadh said:

So Guillermo just randomly decides to have DNA tests run on his boss and his boss’s friends?  Who the hell decides to invade people’s privacy like that? Of all the weird and creepy goings on, that’s just going a little too far. 

He lures people who will be killed by his boss and his boss's friends to their house, and then somehow disposes of the remains. I think he's past invasion of privacy issues. I was a bit surprised that no one was mad at him for doing it, though.

I do think it's dangerous to have their DNA, or anything to do with them at all, in any type of database.

I hope there is an episode where a census taker comes to the house.  That would be interesting.  Especially with the possibility of there being a citizenship question on the next census.

Edited by ItCouldBeWorse
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Did Nadja's inability/refusal to say the name "Jeff" remind anyone else of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt? They did the same joke with the same name, when Titus kept acting like he couldn't remember the name of his ex's new boyfriend, and called him things like "Jorp."

I think it's more the case that a.) she's never heard the name "Jeff" before (not exactly an old-world type name) and b.) can't believe her beloved Gregor would have such a weird, boring name. When she first saw him back in the pilot she kept saying "Jeff? Really? Jeff?"

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On 5/30/2019 at 1:32 PM, LGraves65 said:

"Ow my buuurns" is my new catchphrase. 

My husband and I have taken to hissing at each other and the dogs. Never fails to crack us up and make things better. 

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So, now that the original airing is over, does anybody know where and when it will be available on a main streaming site? Not only do I know people who don't have cable and are waiting to binge it, but I myself would actually like to zip through a rewatch in the episodes' actual intended viewing order.

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4 hours ago, CletusMusashi said:

So, now that the original airing is over, does anybody know where and when it will be available on a main streaming site? Not only do I know people who don't have cable and are waiting to binge it, but I myself would actually like to zip through a rewatch in the episodes' actual intended viewing order.

Amazon Prime has it.

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On 6/4/2019 at 1:12 AM, CletusMusashi said:

So, now that the original airing is over, does anybody know where and when it will be available on a main streaming site? Not only do I know people who don't have cable and are waiting to binge it, but I myself would actually like to zip through a rewatch in the episodes' actual intended viewing order.

I watched it via Sling and they still have all the episodes available. I’m really enjoying watching them all again!

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Gregor/Jeff/Jesk!  OMG! Lazlo knew the whole time! And he was okay with it except that he made Nadja cry!  I loved that.  But I will miss Gregor/Jeff/Jesk.  The actor was great (and cute) and hilarious.  "I am Gregor - great warrior! Ask my love, Nadja.  She turned into a pile of rats!" "I AM CLEANING WOMAN!".

 

For any Matt Berry fans with access to Channel 4 in the UK, he's starring in a new series called "Year of the Rabbit" starting on Monday the 10th June. 

It's a comedy drama 'set in the dark heart of Victorian London'

I wish I could see that.  Maybe it will eventually be on Netflix like "Toast of London".

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1 hour ago, Laurie M said:

Gregor/Jeff/Jesk!  OMG! Lazlo knew the whole time! And he was okay with it except that he made Nadja cry!  I loved that.  But I will miss Gregor/Jeff/Jesk.  The actor was great (and cute) and hilarious.  "I am Gregor - great warrior! Ask my love, Nadja.  She turned into a pile of rats!" "I AM CLEANING WOMAN!".

Laszlo didn't just know, but he was the one who kept beheading Gregor.  When I realized that Nadja has been married to Laszlo for centuries, but Gregor was the true love of her life (and several of his) I thought it was great... the bizarre yet oddly-romantic thing you can do in a vampire story.  Then when Laszlo revealed that he's the one that's been killing Gregor every time, I just busted out laughing.  That seemed to take it to the next level for me.  Of course he knew, and of course he'd kill the bastard every time!

I loved how Gregor was beheaded this time, by the wire that Laszlo made Guillermo string up (and thus indirectly by Laszlo himself).  Unexpected callback to the earlier scene.

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One of the things I love about this series is how they've managed to make these bloodthirsty serial killers...sweet-natured at heart:

[As Madeleine is being loaded into the ambulance:]

Nandor(yelling down): Guillermo!! What is this feeling I am having?

Guillermo(yelling up): It's "grief", Master!

Nandor(soberly): I don't much care for it.

-- I wanted to hug him.

And p.s.:  I've taken to calling people "big goaders", then giggling like a 6-year-old.

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On ‎5‎/‎30‎/‎2019 at 12:33 AM, LittleIggy said:

OMG! It will be hard waiting for next season. The gang suffering in the Church was hysterical! I knew Guillermo was going to throw holy water on Nandor. Which raises a question. If Nandor was Muslim before he was turned, why would Christian symbols and churches affect him? Is any religious item, whatever the religion, harmful to vampires? I’ve often wondered about that.  Could Laszlo and Nadja go into a mosque? 

Piñata farmers! 😆😂🤣

I guess it depends on what the writers decide, but I remember the stipulation they had on Highlander about not being able to fight on holy ground. This would be holy ground of any description: church, temple, synagogue, mosque, Indian burial ground, pagan secret circle--didn't matter, as long as it was holy to someone.

I would imagine the same could apply here.

And as soon as I saw they were going to a church for the funeral, I knew it was going to by hysterical! But really, they could have just gone to graveside; I'm sure cemeteries are a home away from home for a vampire.

And I did love the way that, even after he's spent the past 10 years working hard to become a vampire, Guillermo still couldn't help genuflecting and crossing himself before he left the church. I guess some habits die hard. If Harvey G. threw that part in himself, I thought it was very true to the character.

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I adore how Nadja treats both Nandor and her husband Laszlo as if they are “big stupid turkeys” as she once described them! Her eye rolls and significant looks toward the camera crew make me LOL. 

Another favorite scene is when Gregor-Jesk wanted her to have sex with him and she said “It is forbidden” then she had the “angel-devil” debate with herself and said, “But I have been married so long!” Yet she clearly loves Laszlo and is loyal to him. She’s awesome.

Edited by RedHawk · Reason: Correct spelling of Laszlo
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Rewatching the season and I crack up at how fucking weird she is when encountering Jesk... she's all labored breathing and craning her head, baring her fangs and laughing too loudly. It's hilarious that he just eats it up, and doesn't even mind she's like two inches from his face. 😄

 

Do we know who sired Nandor? I don't remember him saying. He told about "When I first became a vampire..." and how his wives left him, but I don't recall him disclosing who made him a creature of the night. We know Nadja turned Laszlo, and of course Jenna. 

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