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Kristen Doute: Cigarette Sally


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She is like the messiah of gifs.

I need a gif of her screwing the cap back on the wine bottle (during her meeting with MiamiGirl) in my life. The look she gives in that moment cracked my shit up.

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These reels are great.  I really like seeing reality stars actually doing real acting!  Moving from reality to scripted programming isn't that easy but perhaps VR will change things a little.

 

I am actually a fan of both Kristen and Scheanna.  The show would be a complete snoozefest without either one of them.  Kristen brings the cray-cray and Scheanna brings the dramatics. Stassi is just plain mean (and consequently completely uninteresting to me) and the other girls have flat personalities.

 

I think their reals are interesting and seem to mirror how they are on VR.  Scheanna's reel is light an playful and Kristen's is dark and dramatic.  Just like on VPR

Edited by Jextella
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Well, this is all sorts of interesting....

 

http://www.realitytea.com/2015/02/23/kristen-doute-taking-break-twitter-preparation-vanderpump-rules-finale/

 

 

 

Kristen Doute is ducking and taking cover in preparation for the Vanderpump Rules finale! Tonight will reveal the explosive conclusion over what happened between “Miami Girl” and Tom Sandoval, resulting in a massive fight!

Kristen teams up with Stassi Schroeder and resorts to using Jax Taylor as a source of the “truth” regarding what happened in Miami – Jax has changed his story several times. As a result Kristen ends up on the outs with all of her friends from SUR!

In anticipation for the onslaught of negativity she is surely to receive, Kristen announced she’s taking a wee break from twitter to focus on her healthy relationship with James Kennedy, her friends, and bowling. She also celebrated her birthday!

 

Hmmmmm....  

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She's living on soup, fro-yo, vodka and cigarettes.

Man, this could be a great season with Kristen on prescription painkillers.

Seriously, I hope she has a speedy recovery and no permanent damage or scarring to her face.

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I need a gif of her screwing the cap back on the wine bottle (during her meeting with MiamiGirl) in my life. The look she gives in that moment cracked my shit up.

I don't have a gif but this moment literally just happened as I was reading your post and I took a picture with my phone. It really is an amazing stank face.

JVlBAVn.jpg

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Apparently Kristen fell somehow and fractured her face, requiring surgery: http://www.bravotv.com/the-daily-dish/vanderpump-rules-kristen-doute-well-wishes-after-injury

Funny that they don't mention HOW she fell, I wonder if she was drunk? Regardless, it sounds quite serious and I hope she gets well. These people seem suceptible to injuring their faces, aren't they? (Scheana with her teeth, Jax with his nose job)

 

Seeing as how Kristen appears drunk 99% of the time, I would guess she fell because she may actually have been sober.

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Kristen's t-shirt line (link from her twitter) http://www.shopbenchmark.com/jamesmae

I have missed these nincompoops!

Wow. Christmas shopping done!

Seriously though, Kristen is maybe the least natural fit as a designer out of all of these idiots. Not because she looks so much worse than anyone else (although she does look like she needs a shower ALL THE TIME. I know it's a drought, but you can still shower), but because she always looks like she doesn't give a shit about design at all. Her clothes and apartment always read as someone who doesn't really care about aesthetics and just goes with whatever's trendy, easy, and there.

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E! reports that Kristen broke her orbital socket by falling out of an Uber.

 

Is this the same Uber that Muppet Baby James supposedly caught after hooking up with some vague chick mentioned last week? 

 

Kristen really needs to get her stalking skills in order.

 

Her t-shirt line is hilarious.  She needs one that says "I Did Not Sleep with Jax Taylor" on the front and on the back "Okay, I Slept with Jax Taylor."   Or how about one that says "Camel Smoking Cougar"   Or "Busboys Do It Better"  Or "Ariana Can Suck It" 

 

The options are endless.    

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Is this the same Uber that Muppet Baby James supposedly caught after hooking up with some vague chick mentioned last week?

Kristen really needs to get her stalking skills in order.

Her t-shirt line is hilarious. She needs one that says "I Did Not Sleep with Jax Taylor" on the front and on the back "Okay, I Slept with Jax Taylor." Or how about one that says "Camel Smoking Cougar" Or "Busboys Do It Better" Or "Ariana Can Suck It"

The options are endless.

Let's not forget the Season 1 classic "I'm like the best girlfriend ever."

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Kristen said on WWHL that she is dating Alecs from Below Deck and he will be on Vanderpump Rules. Since Rocky supposedly works for him, I wonder if they will hang out?

 

 

She's actually dating a guy named Brian Carter that she met on Bumble now so I don't think there will be any interaction between Rocky and her. That would be interesting though! IMO, Kristen > Rocky.

Edited by Elizabeth
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I almost....almost... felt sorry for Kristen when she tried to photobomb the Sur group photo this past week. It was so desperate and pathetic to watch, her trying to get in there with her former friends and coworkers. It was really sad to see, and, like Lisa said in her TH, is indicative of how much things have changed for Kristen. (But why would she want to get into a photo, joking or not, in a place where she doesn't work anymore - was fired from! - and is full of people she claims to hate?)

Edited by AnnieBananie
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I almost....almost... felt sorry for Kristen when she tried to photobomb the Sur group photo this past week. It was so desperate and pathetic to watch, her trying to get in there with her former friends and coworkers. It was really sad to see, and, like Lisa said in her TH, is indicative of how much things have changed for Kristen. (But why would she want to get into a photo, joking or not, in a place where she doesn't work anymore - was fired from! - and is full of people she claims to hate?)

It's a little sad. Schwartz is dating/soon to be engaged to Katie and actual friends Sandoval, Jax, and Scheana. It makes perfect sense why we see Schwartz all the time, but if you notice he tries not to show up at the restaurants too often. Kristen isn't dating James any longer and is comfortable acquaintances with Jax, Scheana, and Katie. Like there is no real reason for her to be around as much as she is except for the show. And unlike Stassi, she's willing to engage and be part of the messiness.

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While driving to get something for lunch today, I saw a greasy disheveled wonan standing on the median with a cigarette in hand and a moppet clutching to her. She must seen me staring and yelled something i couldn't hear at me. I swear I initially wondered what Kristen was doing in Tallahassee! :-D

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Jax was on WWHL the other day and he said he hadn't seen Kristen for awhile.  Not sure if that is a bit of foreboding.

The show has turned a corner and I'm not sure Kristen made the cut.  I was rooting for her because she seems like someone who wants to do things with her life but just doesn't have the skill set to make them happen.  Twitter post is case in point.  Her street lingo is really child-like.  She'll be at a certain age before she knows it and the cool-chick vibe she's hoping she conveys right now isn't going to carry her forward where a career is concerned.

I do hope the Tom-Tom bar is a "go".  I think it's a great idea and a great name and I'm ready for the show to cover a bit of new territory.

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Per her Snapchat, she and Carter(!!!) both were present and accounted for at the main titles shoot, so I think it's a sure thing that she's included this season. But yeah, I don't know why. Stassi neither. They have to work too hard to include these folks, since they 1) don't work at Sur and 2) are only really friends with Awful Katie. It's not like Carter's suddenly going to make Doute interesting. Let it go, show.

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On 10/3/2017 at 10:32 PM, Pachengala said:

Per her Snapchat, she and Carter(!!!) both were present and accounted for at the main titles shoot, so I think it's a sure thing that she's included this season. But yeah, I don't know why. Stassi neither. They have to work too hard to include these folks, since they 1) don't work at Sur and 2) are only really friends with Awful Katie. It's not like Carter's suddenly going to make Doute interesting. Let it go, show.

Boy, at this point I'd rather have Carter on the show than Doute. Doute makes Carter interesting. 

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I just miss VPR so, so much. Probably because of the Toms, as well as Kristen. I'd even add Jax to that mix, but his relationship with Brittany is just so depressing. 

The VPR gestalt requires Kristen to succeed. She adds a level of weirdness to the show that is so part of its fabric that--when taken away--leaves you with a snorefest like the Kentucky show. I don't need to watch Grumpy Cat be a smug unicorn, nor do I need to watch Scheana be Scheana (aka cry and talk about how amazing she is). In the Lucky Charms box that is VPR, Kristen is a green clover marshmallow. An original and classic.

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32 minutes ago, ghoulina said:

Unfortunately. 

I miss Crazy Kristen!

HAHA right?? she's barely even in this season's trailer, b/c she doesn't create any noteworthy drama anymore! 

I am kinda happy for her, in another way, tho, bc her behavior, while entertaining, was also sometimes cringeworthy and hard to watch, at least for me. like when she'd just come to tom's house when they'd already broken up, and ariana was there, ugh it was just like, "girl, what are you doing, PLEASE have an ounce of dignity and leave!" 

Like i found myself rooting for her. 

but agreed, it'd be nice if, once in a while, the crazy would come back out! maybe she still is kinda crazy, but it's just not shown, since carter is not really part of the show. 

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I think I recall hearing Kristen makes more of an appearance as the season goes on - mostly due to Jax cheating on Brittany.

I wish Kristen would get a real career.  I'm in her court, and she seems to be floundering.

Edited by Jextella
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Hey all, new user here and I only joined to post some good(?) news about Kristin.

I live in MI and this weekend I visited the Greektown Casino in Detroit.  They have been doing renovations and trying to update their image.  They have these huge posters and video screens depicting people enjoying everything the casino has to offer.  And who's face did I see all over? Kristin's! Gambling,  on a "romantic" date, enjoying the nightlife etc.

Definitely took me by surprise seeimg her face everywhere. 

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http://people.com/food/vanderpump-rules-kristen-doute-hippie-spread/

Quote

Kristen Doute stars on Vanderpump Rules (Mondays at 9 p.m. ET on Bravo) and shares her journey as a longtime vegetarian—plus delicious, healthful recipes—on her website, Vegiholic. Each week, she’ll share a cocktail or food recipe inspired by the episode. Follow her on Twitter and Instagram at @kristendoute

The first installment: “While my friends were partying it up in Vegas during last week’s episode, I was hanging back in sunny Los Angeles, whipping up this Hippie Spread!”

She needs a food stylist, stat.

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On 3/15/2018 at 10:57 AM, editorgrrl said:

http://people.com/food/vanderpump-rules-kristen-doute-hippie-spread/

The first installment: “While my friends were partying it up in Vegas during last week’s episode, I was hanging back in sunny Los Angeles, whipping up this Hippie Spread!”

She needs a food stylist, stat.

HAHA!  Yes, the food looks... not appetizing.

I will admit, I wouldn't mind trying some vegan food options.  I may even try these.

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On 3/16/2018 at 1:18 PM, heatherchandler said:

HAHA!  Yes, the food looks... not appetizing.

I will admit, I wouldn't mind trying some vegan food options.  I may even try these.

I had no idea she had a website, but I really like it and I like it better than any of the other SURver businesses.

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On 9/27/2019 at 9:28 PM, ivygirl said:

Hilarious. Filed under “Love is Dead” and titled “Vanderpump Rules' Kristen Doute and Her Bearded Loafer Boyfriend Brian Carter Broke Up.”

Seriously, what a loser he was. An aging bearded gamer who was content to sit around and sponge from his girlfriend. What was his actual career even? Did he even work?!

Kristen has dated so many losers since breaking up with Sandoval that I’m shocked she managed to be as involved with Sandoval as long as she was...maybe fame went to her head and she got progressively crazier as time went on, who knows??

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On 9/24/2019 at 1:11 PM, Marley said:

I love how she has to do this huge ig paragraph about it. Lol like I don’t think anyone cares that much about their relationship status. They will probably get back together anyways.

I mean many VR fans are continually asking/speculating/Looking for clues so I don’t think she’s wrong that the people who follow her IG at least care.

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On 12/26/2014 at 6:34 AM, ghoulina said:

She goes over to her old apt. 5 times a week to collect mail and other odds and ends she just happened to forget last time,

I was rewatching Seasons 2 and 3 over the New Year's holiday -- at this time Sandoval and Kristin still worked at SUR - there was no REASON for her to go to his apartment to pick up her mail - he could have brought it to her at work.  Even the cable box - put it in his trunk and hand it over to her at the end of her shift when she was leaving.  I'm pretty sure these chucklefucks all DRIVE to work.  

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