Josiah and Lauren: He Has To Marry Somebody

[yogi2014L]

3 hours ago, farmgal4 said:

With her histrionics one mosquito bite, and Josiah will never hear the end of it.

Can you imagine her during labor/postpartum?? Siah is in for it.  But actually its a good thing. If she is a complete nightmare maybe he will be less than willing to impregnate her again. 

[irisheyes]

I still can’t believe that on her Anniversary post, she basically said the last year had sucked. The first year of marriage is usually awesome, even if some bad things happen.  And, these two have it easier than most couples since they don’t have to work or worry about getting the bills paid.  Mr. Irisheyes and I got married at 21, we had no money, could barely afford the $200 rent on a teeny one bedroom cottage, but it was still awesome.  I mean, come on, when you’re newlyweds, all you want to do is have sex, and you can do it basically whenever (and wherever you want). . .

And, I think I just figured out what’s wrong. Sorry, Lauren, he’s just not that into you. 

[JKL845]

Don't like competitive tragedies or one upmanship on pain. Pain is very personal. I've never lost a child and hopefully never will. But I can tell you hands down that if I did, it would be THE most devastating event of my life. I would always think of the year it happened as the worst year of my life. It's perfectly fine if others don't feel that way, but it's okay for those who do.

[doodlebug]

11 hours ago, irisheyes said:

I still can’t believe that on her Anniversary post, she basically said the last year had sucked. The first year of marriage is usually awesome, even if some bad things happen.  And, these two have it easier than most couples since they don’t have to work or worry about getting the bills paid.  Mr. Irisheyes and I got married at 21, we had no money, could barely afford the $200 rent on a teeny one bedroom cottage, but it was still awesome.  I mean, come on, when you’re newlyweds, all you want to do is have sex, and you can do it basically whenever (and wherever you want). . .

And, I think I just figured out what’s wrong. Sorry, Lauren, he’s just not that into you. 

It would've been nice, even kind, had Lauren said that despite the sad events, she was so grateful for her husband's love and support and how much easier it is when burdens are shared; that she looked forward to sharing happy times with him in the years to come.  You know, stuff that made it seem like she might even like him a little.  Instead, it was essentially a list of complaints with no mention of the joys of marriage.  Of course, perhaps this marriage is joyless.

Surely, she could've mentioned the actual wedding and/or honeymoon as happy times in the past year along with the sad.

I do agree that Lauren is allowed to feel what she feels about her miscarriage.  Just because something 'worse' didn't happen doesn't mean it wasn't difficult for her.  I have told patients who suffered miscarriages that often the greater world doesn't understand the depth of their feelings about the loss.  Most women feel that the pending baby is very real from the moment the stick changes color and they start thinking of their future in terms of their child from the start.  I point out that, if their mother died, no one would ever say, 'Well, at least your father didn't die, that would've been worse'.  Telling someone who had a miscarriage that they can have other kids or they could've had a stillbirth or a baby who died is not helpful. I tell them it's like asking if you'd rather be stabbed with a 4 inch knife or an 8 inch one.  Well, I'd rather not be stabbed at all, thanks.

Edited July 3, 2019 by doodlebug

[ehall1052]

I just saw several pictures of Christina El Moussa (forgot her new married name) and in every shot cradling her baby bump.  Guess this is the way it’s done now!

[Abstract]

That is how it's done now. Even the store mannequins are in on the act.

Just to let you all know, I was in Target minding my own business, saw this mannequin, and had to take a picture because I thought of Lauren.

Edited July 4, 2019 by Abstract

[Lunera]

Lauren deleted the comment from Joy's page and posted this

[GeeGolly]

20 minutes ago, Lunera said:

Lauren deleted the comment from Joy's page and posted this

Lauren still couldn't leave herself out of it. She didn't get it.

[mynextmistake]

8 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

Lauren still couldn't leave herself out of it. She didn't get it.

Lauren is a terrible person. I feel so sorry for her children. She’s even more of a narcissist than Michelle. She’s going to be an absolutely appalling mother. 

[cmr2014]

2 hours ago, mynextmistake said:

Lauren is a terrible person. I feel so sorry for her children. She’s even more of a narcissist than Michelle. She’s going to be an absolutely appalling mother. 

I hadn't thought about it in these terms, but you're absolutely right. I'd been kind of thinking about her as a tiresome, self-absorbed person, but she's going to be a mom, and she's not going to be okay with putting her child first.

I have always thought that Josiah just kind of took what was presented to him, but I wonder if he was actually attracted to Lauren because she's like his mother. It's hard to believe that anyone could be a worse mother than J'chelle, but maybe Lauren will manage to do so.

[rue721]

I think that Josiah likes strong personalities. He used to have one himself!

Lauren is a trip. I think she's got a lot of emotions going on and spilling out all over, but there's not really a good outlet for them in her world. If she were a brittle, sensitive, and theatrical college freshmen trying to create an adult identity for herself, she would probably be fine. That's perfectly healthy and normal, albeit annoying!

But people like that don't do so well in stifling environments like this one. It seems like, usually, the first identity they pick isn't the best one for them, and they have to run through a few -- crashing and burning a few times even -- before they find themselves and a good outlet for all that emotion and energy.

These two make me sad because I think they've been especially damaged by their environment (because it's such a bad mismatch for their personalities). And now that they're adults, instead of clawing their way out, they're digging in deeper. Which just makes them seem more damaged and hopeless.

Honestly, I think that Lauren will be a pretty terrible mother. Incredibly intense and solipsistic. But that's why babies having babies is a bad thing! And I hate that their baby is basically being conceived as a ball and chain. What a burden this child is going to have.

[Lisa418722]

I think that Lauren will do blanket training because she wants the "perfect" child.  Si had a spark that has been destroyed, but I'm thinking that Lauren will make sure no child of hers ever has that "spark."

Edited July 5, 2019 by Lisa418722

[Jeeves]

I found myself entertaining the idea that Lauren might mature out of some of the worst of her obnoxious self-absorbed attitudes and behavior. I'd like to think so. But I suppose the odds are against it. She's married into the Duggars, who are the least empathetic people I can imagine. (I can't totally forget that image of the Megan Kelly interview after Joshgate broke, with Jill crying miserably on camera with Jessa sitting next to her, cold as ice, doing her best to minimize Josh's molestations and save her TV stah career, and offering no comfort to Jill at all.)

I suppose that Lauren could become good friends with Kendra, who seems to be a kind, warm-hearted, and sensible person, and learn some better behaviors from Kendra's example. I don't know if they are particularly close or not. 

I was just thinking of people I've known, or read about in history, who were callow in their teens and managed to mature a lot along their paths in life. But life in Duggarland probably isn't going to knock that self-absorption out of Lauren's nature. As long as she toes the party line, worships the correct Jesus, and doesn't run afoul of JB and Michelle, she can probably be as snotty and self-absorbed as all get out. 

[Spencer Hastings]

Remember when people thought that Marjorie was overly dramatic and just awful for Josiah?  I’m glad she’s living her absolute best life right now but I wish Josiah had that kind of spark in his life. 

[BetyBee]

I have seen some self centered women change into loving mothers when they have children.   I will not speculate on the type of mother Lauren will be.  She's young and I'm hoping for the best.  

[Trillium]

27 minutes ago, BetyBee said:

I have seen some self centered women change into loving mothers when they have children.   I will not speculate on the type of mother Lauren will be.  She's young and I'm hoping for the best.  

Yes there is nothing more humbling than parenthood. She could get a cold slap of reality once she cleaning up after a toddler who really DGAF about Asa the balloon or mommy’s Pinterest projects.  

[sleepysuzy]

Now I wonder if Lauren's anniversary post is also indirectly referring to Joy and Austin losing Annabell. She didn't list everything, just said more downs than ups. I take that statement to be qualitative, not quantitative. She had a pregnancy loss around 9 months ago, the grandma without whose support the kids would literally not have had clean clothes passed away, and her sister-in-law had a fetal demise at a point when most people feel their pregnancies are safe, which could bring up fears of loss in all of the other pregnant women in the family as well, and even more so for someone whose only other pregnancy was a miscarriage. 

Lauren does not strike me as being as offensive as many others find her to be. I've been told I'm too naive and optimistic about other people, but I just don't see the point in reading everything she ( and others like Jill) say and do in the worst possible tone. I usually skew to the opposite, trying to see how something could have been meant as inoffensively as possible. I don't usually attribute malice until I have more direct evidence. 

Edited July 5, 2019 by sleepysuzy
Typo

[FizzyPuff]

22 hours ago, Lisa418722 said:

I think that Lauren will do blanket training because she wants the "perfect" child.  Si had a spark that has been destroyed, but I'm thinking that Lauren will make sure no child of hers ever has that "spark."

Oh god I hope none of these kids are blanket trained.

21 hours ago, Jeeves said:

I found myself entertaining the idea that Lauren might mature out of some of the worst of her obnoxious self-absorbed attitudes and behavior. I'd like to think so. But I suppose the odds are against it. She's married into the Duggars, who are the least empathetic people I can imagine. (I can't totally forget that image of the Megan Kelly interview after Joshgate broke, with Jill crying miserably on camera with Jessa sitting next to her, cold as ice, doing her best to minimize Josh's molestations and save her TV stah career, and offering no comfort to Jill at all.)

I suppose that Lauren could become good friends with Kendra, who seems to be a kind, warm-hearted, and sensible person, and learn some better behaviors from Kendra's example. I don't know if they are particularly close or not. 

I was just thinking of people I've known, or read about in history, who were callow in their teens and managed to mature a lot along their paths in life. But life in Duggarland probably isn't going to knock that self-absorption out of Lauren's nature. As long as she toes the party line, worships the correct Jesus, and doesn't run afoul of JB and Michelle, she can probably be as snotty and self-absorbed as all get out. 

Jessa is a cold fish but I remember that interview and thinking why doesn’t Jessa pat Jill on the pack or hold her hand or something even just for a few seconds, she just sat there staring at Jill, it was so awkward. But then when you think how they were raised the only physical contact they had with their siblings were side hugs so I shouldn’t have been surprised really.

16 hours ago, BetyBee said:

I have seen some self centered women change into loving mothers when they have children.   I will not speculate on the type of mother Lauren will be.  She's young and I'm hoping for the best.  

I know a lot of people were wondering what Jessa was gonna be like as a parent but you can tell she adores her children. I think Lauren might surprise us all and be similar to Jessa.

[Jeeves]

5 minutes ago, Puffin said:

I know a lot of people were wondering what Jessa was gonna be like as a parent but you can tell she adores her children. I think Lauren might surprise us all and be similar to Jessa.

I hope she does. 

[GeeGolly]

I think Lauren will parent like all the Duggar mothers - the way they were parented and the way they're 'supposed to'.

I also think Lauren will try and portray the same image as Jessa does - one big, happy and healthy family.

No pictures of blanket training, no pictures of having their arm squeezed while mama tells them they're not the center of the universe and no pictures of them sitting quietly with a Bible in their hands. 

Just because a picture wasn't posted, doesn't mean it didn't happen.

[Fuzzysox]

On 7/4/2019 at 7:41 AM, Abstract said:

That is how it's done now. Even the store mannequins are in on the act.

Just to let you all know, I was in Target minding my own business, saw this mannequin, and had to take a picture because I thought of Lauren.

We all know that motherhood will be the mannequin's greatest accomplishment!!

[Churchhoney]

26 minutes ago, Fuzzysox said:

We all know that motherhood will be the mannequin's greatest accomplishment!!

I note that no head or brain is required by this mannequin either. The patriarchy's ideal. 😀

Edited July 6, 2019 by Churchhoney

[GeeGolly]

On 7/4/2019 at 8:41 AM, Abstract said:

That is how it's done now. Even the store mannequins are in on the act.

Just to let you all know, I was in Target minding my own business, saw this mannequin, and had to take a picture because I thought of Lauren.

And Jinger's hat too. A Fundy mannequin. 

[Ohiopirate02]

24 minutes ago, Churchhoney said:

I note that no head or brain is required by this mannequin either. The patriarchy's ideal. 😀

But can the mannequin make a sandwich?

[Churchhoney]

34 minutes ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

But can the mannequin make a sandwich?

Well, she must have done it at least once. 

[JoanArc]

9 hours ago, Puffin said:

I know a lot of people were wondering what Jessa was gonna be like as a parent but you can tell she adores her children.

I think Jessa adores the extension of herself.

[Sofa Sloth]

At least growing up in big fundie families, these girls all have plenty of experience child-rearing the younger siblings for the actual mothers. Practically wise, they should have it locked down. Whether they are emotionally ready to commit to putting all their needs and wants aside, be flexible and to do what’s best for another human is a different story. That comes down to personality and maturity a lot of the time. Kendra and Joy (who are much the same age I think?) appear to have this quality. Lauren comes across way too self-absorbed, vain and fastidious to be able to cope well with motherhood. Outside of the Pinterest Instagram version she’ll inevitably present to the world, I bet Si and Jana will be doing the background work.

[Ijustwantsomechips]

7 hours ago, JoanArc said:

I think Jessa adores the extension of herself.

Thank you @Puffin. I was thinking the same thing this morning. Jessa gets a lot of credit for being such a loving and doting mother, but the bar is very low.  I don’t see much difference between the way she sees her kids and the way Jim Bob sees his kids as the personification of his virility and glory.  She annoys me to no end.  

Lauren strikes me as the type of wife who will have little use for Josiah once the baby gets here.  Until she wants another.  In another life, she’d probably just poke holes in the condom and get ghost.  That girl’s got an agenda.  

Edited July 7, 2019 by Ijustwantsomechips

[GeeGolly]

One thing Jessa and Lauren have in common is the need to manipulate others, however they do it from opposite ends. I see Jessa as a mean girl bully, who makes herself feel better by making others feel worse and I see Lauren as the perpetual victim/martyr making herself feel better by dismissing others, while at the same time vying for sympathy and attention for imagined woes.

Neither makes for great mommy or wife material in my opinion, because neither can get out of their own way. What's worse is they both have married passive men who will unwittingly contribute to their behaviors in order to make life bearable.

Jessa probably says to Ben, "I need some help with these kids, you're never around. What do you do all day anyways?!".

Lauren will probably say to Josiah, as she's serving him dinner, "I've had a migraine all day and stomach issues after eating the bread you bought. And Asa wouldn't eat her tofu and green beans, but I finally got her to sleep. Here's some tatertot casserole, your favorite. I'm going to lay down in a dark room now".

[JoanArc]

10 hours ago, Ijustwantsomechips said:

Thank you @Puffin. I was thinking the same thing this morning. Jessa gets a lot of credit for being such a loving and doting mother, but the bar is very low.  I don’t see much difference between the way she sees her kids and the way Jim Bob sees his kids as the personification of his virility and glory.  She annoys me to no end.  

Lauren strikes me as the type of wife who will have little use for Josiah once the baby gets here.  Until she wants another.  In another life, she’d probably just poke holes in the condom and get ghost.  That girl’s got an agenda.  

Just wait until the kids get minimal homefooled education. That might wake a few people up that Jessa ain't all that. I doubt they'll every go to any other school than the mold house kitchen table. I'd be pleasantly surprised to be wrong. I also wonder how she deal with kids that go through a non-photogenic stage.

[PradaKitty]

I think Ben will fight for his kids’ right to an education. 

[GeeGolly]

8 minutes ago, PradaKitty said:

I think Ben will fight for his kids’ right to an education. 

Wasn't Ben homeschooled?

[Sew Sumi]

7 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

Wasn't Ben homeschooled?

At least his family was in a co-op, and they were allowed to play team sports. A step up from the Duggars and whoever is monitoring their computer lessons these days.

[Churchhoney]

2 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

Wasn't Ben homeschooled?

yep

[lookeyloo]

Maybe Ben's co-op wasn't all that bad.  Pioneer woman homeschooled her 4 kids with the help of a co-op and the older one graduated real college and has a job and the second one is in real college.  they aren't fundie but I think they have some similar values.

[mynextmistake]

On 7/5/2019 at 12:57 PM, BetyBee said:

I have seen some self centered women change into loving mothers when they have children.   I will not speculate on the type of mother Lauren will be.  She's young and I'm hoping for the best.  

I hope you’re right! I think the reason I worry about her ability to parent is that she comes across as self-centered to a degree that can’t be explained solely by age or inexperience. I think Lauren sees the world as a drama starring Lauren, and other people are only important inasmuch as they’re bit players who add to her storyline. She might seem to be an okay mother at first, when her child is little and cute and allows her to indulge in her perfect mommy fantasies, but when the kid gets colic and won’t sleep or upchucks all over her church outfit at church or throws herself down in the entryway of the post office and shrieks like the world is ending because you wouldn’t let her push the button to open the door (not that i’m speaking from experience or anything) or does other normal kid things that make Lauren look “bad” I don’t see her handling it well at all. Being a good parent and being selfish are basically mutually exclusive, and I think Lauren is nothing if she’s not selfish.

[Absolom]

She may well follow the Jill Rodrigues it's all about mama school of parenting.

[Barb23]

I wonder how Lauren's mom acts when she is pregnant. Is she considered queen of the household & waited on constantly by her husband & kids? Maybe being a self centered pregnant woman is all Lauren has ever seen so she is following in her mother's footsteps.  Who knows? 

[leighdear]

Just because Lauren is self-centered, vain, tone deaf on social media, likes attention and is dramatic doesn't mean she'll automatically be a crappy mom. 

Jessa is a perfect example of that.  

[Normades]

11 minutes ago, Barb23 said:

I wonder how Lauren's mom acts when she is pregnant. Is she considered queen of the household & waited on constantly by her husband & kids? Maybe being a self centered pregnant woman is all Lauren has ever seen so she is following in her mother's footsteps.  Who knows? 

Well, we all know a self centered pregnant woman is all Josiah has ever seen!!!!

[mimionthebeach]

On 7/7/2019 at 6:56 PM, lookeyloo said:

Maybe Ben's co-op wasn't all that bad.  Pioneer woman homeschooled her 4 kids with the help of a co-op and the older one graduated real college and has a job and the second one is in real college.  they aren't fundie but I think they have some similar values.

Co-ops probably help. It also probably helped that Ree Drummond graduated from a real college (USC), herself.

(Incidently, second daughter is at University of Arkansas.)

The inadequately homeschooled doing the homeschooling is not a recipe for educational success. And while Lauren does have some real college herself, she hated it. The Duggars just hate real real education. 

[yogi2014L]

My vote is also that Lauren is going to have one hell of an adjustment to parenthood. From what I've seen of her, she is extremely dramatic, self centered and passive aggressive. I think their marriage is going to go for one hell of a ride once their 'second' child arrives. 

I feel like they resent each other already, can't wait to see how lauren deals with suddenly having to do all the child rearing during the day and middle of the night wakeups ect and I can totally see Siah saying " Sorry wimminz work LOL" as some sort of payback 

I just remember staring at my husband sleeping at 2 am while I was breastfeeding the baby and just being PISSED. ( If I woke him up, he would have helped. He was working full time though and I was on leave, so I would do the middle of the night stuff especially since I was breastfeeding)  Even as a mature adult I had a hard time shaking that resentment by the next AM even tho it was MY choice to get up every time, and I had a helpful partner.

[momma2seven]

I'm betting Lauren will have a "traumatic" delivery and will be laid up for much longer than necessary, requiring live in help. Around the time she can't milk that any longer she'll developed an extreme case of post partum so she won't lose her J'servant. Their precious rainbow second baby will be an absolute miracle, but will be one step up from a bubble baby (gotta pass her around the eleventy billion people for sweet photo ops...I mean fellowship!) Her first year of life will be full of health concerns and prayers needed, but by the grace of God they will miraculously overcome all the obstacles and trials. Lauren will make Josiah sleep in a separate bedroom until the spotlight isn't on her anymore and she needs another blessing for attention.

[Heathen]

On 7/10/2019 at 7:31 AM, mimionthebeach said:

Co-ops probably help. It also probably helped that Ree Drummond graduated from a real college (USC), herself.

(Incidently, second daughter is at University of Arkansas.)

The inadequately homeschooled doing the homeschooling is not a recipe for educational success. And while Lauren does have some real college herself, she hated it. The Duggars just hate real real education. 

Ladd Drummond also has a college education. 

The Duggars' bigger problem is laziness. Not one of the Duggar kids, as far as I can tell, inherited Jim Bob's work ethic. Yes, I know what they are now, but Jim Bob and Mullet worked hard when they were starting out. 

[Ohiopirate02]

2 minutes ago, Heathen said:

Ladd Drummond also has a college education. 

The Duggars' bigger problem is laziness. Not one of the Duggar kids, as far as I can tell, inherited Jim Bob's work ethic. Yes, I know what they are now, but Jim Bob and Mullet worked hard when they were starting out. 

It's kind of hard to have a work ethic after your parents beat you into submission and only gave you enough education to satisfy state law.  Michelle might have worked hard in the early years, but she checked out when it was time to encourage her kids to further their educations.  She was not looking to participate in any home school coop because that would have been too much work for her.  

[Heathen]

14 minutes ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

It's kind of hard to have a work ethic after your parents beat you into submission and only gave you enough education to satisfy state law.  Michelle might have worked hard in the early years, but she checked out when it was time to encourage her kids to further their educations.  She was not looking to participate in any home school coop because that would have been too much work for her.  

I'm aware of all that, but if the Duggar kids can learn to parent differently and dress differently than their parents did, they can learn to work, too. 

Mullet checked out long before it was time to educate her kids. She checked out when she had her "laundry room breakdown" and realized she could manipulate other people into doing the (literal) dirty work for her. 

[galaxychaser]

I wonder if Lauren will deliver at home or hospital! Hopefully Jilly muffin will stay away with her medical thingies.

I hope Lauren matures up a bit once she has a baby to take care of.

Jana might move in for a while...

You guys what if Lauren names the baby Annabell???

[Westiepeach]

54 minutes ago, galaxychaser said:

You guys what if Lauren names the baby Annabell???

I would joyfully hold Lauren down while Joy beats her to a pulp. 

You’re welcome. 

[StaceyNotStacie]

3 hours ago, galaxychaser said:

You guys what if Lauren names the baby Annabell???

I don’t think she’s that stupid to do that. After the backlash that she got when mentioning “Asa” after Joy lost her baby, I don’t think naming her baby after Joy’s baby would go over very well. 

[Saylii]

6 hours ago, galaxychaser said:

You guys what if Lauren names the baby Annabell???

I could easily see Bella.  It continues the ABC name theme everyone thinks they’ll use and be a one-up nod towards Joy.

Bella Milagro Duggar.  I totally see it.