S05.E12: My Big Fat Baby

[MegD]

8 minutes ago, Elizzikra said:

WHY IS WHITNEY SITTING IN THE MIDDLE OF BUDDY AND HEATHER'S PERSONAL CONVERSATION?!?!?!?!?

I'm going with she's unable to rock herself up to get out of the way. Yep, that's why she's there. She's physically stuck. Because that's the only way you'd find me at a conversation this awkward.

5 minutes ago, Elizzikra said:

Quote

Why are they even having this conversation?

Episode filler?

Because Buddy skipped out of several episodes and Heather had the balls to miss Hawaii so they both need to make up those lost paychecks.

[PityFree]

She wanted to adopt a Korean child????????.??????!!!

 They are not souvenirs, Whitney!

Edited March 21, 2018 by PityFree

[LookABird]

Run, Tal!  

He is doomed.

[3girlsforus]

Run Tal!!!!!!!!

[LordOfLotion]

OK... We need to officially start the online campaign to free Tal Fish. Why did he even move in there?? Didn't he have a boyfriend or something??

[aliya]

1 minute ago, PityFree said:

She wanted to adopt a Korean child????????.??????!!!

But of course she didn't because that would mean going thru a process, having a regular home life, thinking of someone other than yourself... so many reasons why she doesn't ever finish anything.

[Irate Panda]

This bitch can’t even take care of herself and she wants to adopt a child??  She hasn’t even mastered taking care of the litter boxes for her adopted cats.

[3girlsforus]

She says ‘I don’t care if this is a half-baked plan.’  Yea that’s what you want to hear about a plan to adopt a child. 

[Haleybug]

Poor Buddy!  He can’t get away from her.  This. Is. Killing. Me. 

[PityFree]

“ you live in a giant litter box !” Hahahahahahahahaaaaaaaa!!!!!!

[LookABird]

Todd is not a vote of confidence; he is the voice of reason.

[3girlsforus]

3 minutes ago, Haleybug said:

Poor Buddy!  He can’t get away from her.  This. Is. Killing. Me. 

The previously mentioned Tal get away fund needs to help Buddy disappear too. 

Todd is killing it. Love his comments about the cats. 

Whitney and Heather have the same disease. They can’t  read the ‘he’s not that into you’ vibe. 

Edited March 21, 2018 by 3girlsforus

[Donut Bear]

Ha.  Buddy is through with her.  She cannot believe he is not falling over with joy that she is in Charleston.

[Irate Panda]

Lol Todd said the same thing I did, she lives in a giant litter box.  I’m hoping this adoption thing is just this months storyline and will fade away like FM, I’m a lesbian, I’m a radio producer, etc.

Buddy should change his phone number LOL

[3girlsforus]

I think Todd is the only one having fun on the show these days. He’s loving just saying anything he wants and not having to have any filter. 

[Uuuugghh]

Don’t those who get clean somehow look better? Buddy looks the exact same-puffy, bags under eyes, etc....You can just understand him better. 

[Katydid]

Oh my goodness, an aquaintance of mine is at the dance class. I guess it makes sense because she knows Whitney from high school and now lives in Charleston. 

Edited March 21, 2018 by Katydid

[Snarkastikate]

Looks like Whit can hardly move anymore.  Todd is running this class,  she's out of breath!

[MegD]

Notice Twit's not dancing in this class. She's demonstrating but when Todd starts speeding the tempo up, she's wandering around. Or they film her for less than 30 seconds "dancing" full out.

Buddy is over her. Block her number dude. Block her number.

[aliya]

As the leader, Twit should have been able to dance with each person in the circle. I see that they ended up dancing with each other. She can't even do a little freestyle dance with her fans. I'm sure each of them would have loved to go home and say they had a one on one dance with Twit. I'm being serious. But that would take physical effort on Twit's part, so we know that's not going to happen.

[LordOfLotion]

Aw, Shitney is gonna cry her eyes out next week. You know what? I don't really give a crap. Another bomb just went off in Austin, she's a selfish pig and maybe she should think before she acts. Fuck her feelings.

[PityFree]

 Why on earth do Whitney and Tal  need to go talk to her parents about the adoption. They don’t need to know until things are going to be final and they are  about to get a kid.  Unless Whitney’s parents are still supporting her they don’t need to be involved in her adult decisions. 

 I really don’t understand why she comes to them with things like that. it’s almost like she gets some satisfaction out of their disappointment in her and defying them — and she doesn’t want to let that feeling go. 

Edited March 21, 2018 by PityFree
Typos

[Donut Bear]

2 minutes ago, aliya said:

As the leader, Twit should have been able to dance with each person in the circle. I see that they ended up dancing with each other. She can't even do a little freestyle dance with her fans. I'm sure each of them would have loved to go home and say they had a one on one dance with Twit. I'm being serious. But that would take physical effort on Twit's part, so we know that's not going to happen.

Yet she is a monster in the gym -- so strong (not)

Edited March 21, 2018 by Donut Bear

[Snarkastikate]

 Missed the Buddy/Heather meeting.   Did she get the closure she craved? He was screwing around with other chicks behind her back,  right?

[3girlsforus]

B

1 minute ago, PityFree said:

 Why on earth do with me and towel need to go talk to her parents about the adoption. They don’t need to know until things are going to be final and they are  about to get a kid.  Unless Whitney’s parents are still supporting her they don’t need to be involved in her adult decisions. 

 I really don’t understand why she comes to them with things like that. it’s almost like she gets some satisfaction out of their disappointment and her and defying them — and she doesn’t want to let that feeling go. 

That’s exactly why she does it. She loves the idea of being ‘alternative’ and flaunting the possibility in their face. 

[Donut Bear]

2 minutes ago, PityFree said:

 Why on earth do with me and towel need to go talk to her parents about the adoption. They don’t need to know until things are going to be final and they are  about to get a kid.  Unless Whitney’s parents are still supporting her they don’t need to be involved in her adult decisions. 

 I really don’t understand why she comes to them with things like that. it’s almost like she gets some satisfaction out of their disappointment and her and defying them — and she doesn’t want to let that feeling go. 

I love that  autocorrect changed Tal to Towel

[Elizzikra]

Quote

Why on earth do Whitney and Tal  need to go talk to her parents about the adoption. 

To fill screen time?

[MegD]

4 minutes ago, PityFree said:

Why on earth do Whitney and Tal  need to go talk to her parents about the adoption. They don’t need to know until things are going to be final and they are  about to get a kid.  Unless Whitney’s parents are still supporting her they don’t need to be involved in her adult decisions. 

 I really don’t understand why she comes to them with things like that. it’s almost like she gets some satisfaction out of their disappointment and her and defying them — and she doesn’t want to let that feeling go. 

Well someone has to pay for the adoption.

[Brooks]

2 minutes ago, Donut Bear said:

I love that  autocorrect changed Tal to Towel

and "with me", LOL

[Snarkastikate]

Todd is the most sensible character on this show...... who woulda thunk it!!

[PityFree]

Just now, Brooks said:

and "with me", LOL

 LOL you guys, I am a terrible typist so I always use speech to text and then I miss some of the corrections I need to make!

[Brooks]

Really bad makeup for the THs.  Did I just not notice before this season?

[3girlsforus]

That is one super strong stadium chair

[Snarkastikate]

Bitch  just loves freaking her parents out, has the maturity of a 13 year old.   What's wrong with Tal, i thought better of him than this.   

[aliya]

1 minute ago, PityFree said:

 I really don’t understand why she comes to them with things like that. it’s almost like she gets some satisfaction out of their disappointment and her and defying them — and she doesn’t want to let that feeling go. 

That's what it is! I couldn't put my finger on it, but it's the defying nature of much of her interaction with her parents. Like a 15 yr old. At this age, Twit should be starting to see that her parents may be right about some things. I don't find them to be terrible people and they have tried to do their best by her, tho they may have overdone it a bit and are too coddling when they need a firmer hand - or to step back and let her flounder on her own. 

I'm going to be a contrarian here and say I agree with Glenn about getting married and having children in that order. I was a young widow. I know what it is to be a single mom - but my son and I started from the right place - two parents, together. We diminish men in our attempts to support women. We make fun of men in commercials and the movies, and then wonder why they play video games until they're 35 and avoid commitment. Especially in the black community, having a father in the home is becoming a rarity.  Single parenthood is a primary cause of female poverty. Can single mothers can raise wonderful children, of course, but it shouldn't be the first choice and isn't the best for the child or for society. All that said, I'd have more respect for Twit if she adopted an older child and not a baby. 

Finally - folks, put the phones down! Look at the balloons and the life around you through your own eyes, not the camera lens.

[TurtlePower]

40 minutes ago, aliya said:

But of course she didn't because that would mean going thru a process, having a regular home life, thinking of someone other than yourself... so many reasons why she doesn't ever finish anything.

Yaaaaass! Just another passing phase of hers she will never complete. She wears them like underwear--One day she likes women, another day she wants to convert to Judaism, the next day she wants to adopt a Korean baby. 

[alabetser]

49 minutes ago, aliya said:

They sound like the kids at my Girl Scout camp at the end of the summer, "We'll always be friends, forever and ever!" Please people, grow up. Let Buddy do is thing and let Heather get her life in gear and pay some attention to her children. 

Maybe it's from being an Air Force brat or living in DC with everyone being a transient, but I just don't get this need to hang on. People come, people go. Nothing's forever. Deal with it.  (and yes, I'll be playing the Grinch at the Christmas pageant this year)

Whit and her barnacles are all old friends from high school if I remember correctly. Most people go off and make new friends in their adult life, learning new coping skills and such, but I would bet they all have some emotional stunting that keeps them together. Not saying that everyone who keeps close with old friends is that way, but given all their other behavior I would bet there's a connection/reason why they all never moved on.

[Snarkastikate]

2 minutes ago, aliya said:

That's what it is! I couldn't put my finger on it, but it's the defying nature of much of her interaction with her parents. Like a 15 yr old. At this age, Twit should be starting to see that her parents may be right about some things. I don't find them to be terrible people and they have tried to do their best by her, tho they may have overdone it a bit and are too coddling when they need a firmer hand - or to step back and let her flounder on her own. 

I'm going to be a contrarian here and say I agree with Glenn about getting married and having children in that order. I was a young widow. I know what it is to be a single mom - but my son and I started from the right place - two parents, together. We diminish men in our attempts to support women. We make fun of men in commercials and the movies, and then wonder why they play video games until they're 35 and avoid commitment. Especially in the black community, having a father in the home is becoming a rarity.  Single parenthood is a primary cause of female poverty. Can single mothers can raise wonderful children, of course, but it shouldn't be the first choice and isn't the best for the child or for society. All that said, I'd have more respect for Twit if she adopted an older child and not a baby. 

Finally - folks, put the phones down! Look at the balloons and the life around you through your own eyes, not the camera lens.

Very true,  I totally agree.   My late husband and I were unable to have children,  looked into adoption but it ain't as easy as Whit seems to think it is,  she thinks she can shop for one and have her pick.  Nope.  And these poor kids are often born to  addicted parents., they will have issues.  I just don't see her qualifying for a baby,  and what if she or Tal meets someone,  what happens then.  I think the whole storyline  is a bullshit lie.

[TurtlePower]

9 minutes ago, alabetser said:

Whit and her barnacles are all old friends from high school if I remember correctly. Most people go off and make new friends in their adult life, learning new coping skills and such, but I would bet they all have some emotional stunting that keeps them together. Not saying that everyone who keeps close with old friends is that way, but given all their other behavior I would bet there's a connection/reason why they all never moved on.

Agree. I know these types. At one point, they were the "popular" group in school but, the rest of us grew up and moved on. They must be stuck in a time warp. They spend get togethers and reunions huddled together, like they still matter. Meanwhile, the rest of us are trying to catch up with one another. 

Edited March 21, 2018 by TurtlePower

[mybuddyspence]

1 hour ago, aliya said:

They sound like the kids at my Girl Scout camp at the end of the summer, "We'll always be friends, forever and ever!" Please people, grow up. Let Buddy do is thing and let Heather get her life in gear and pay some attention to her children. 

Maybe it's from being an Air Force brat or living in DC with everyone being a transient, but I just don't get this need to hang on. People come, people go. Nothing's forever. Deal with it.  (and yes, I'll be playing the Grinch at the Christmas pageant this year)

I don't get it either. I haven't seen the people who my best friends in high school in years and it's not a big deal to me. Or to them either, I would imagine. 

3 hours ago, Elizzikra said:

FWIW, I'm a social worker and I worked in adoption for years, both in private agency adoption (in which birth parents voluntarily place an infant for adoption without the involvement of the public child welfare system) and in adoption from foster care.

To the first point - there are two major decision points that would impact whether or not Whitney (or anyone else) could adopt. The first is completion of a home study. Requirements vary in ever state but I am not aware of any state that specifically prohibits adoption by any person due to a particular medical condition (including obesity). I worked with families who had a host of medical issues including cystic fibrosis, HIV/AIDS, blindness, diabetes, cancer and obesity. None of these conditions absolutely ruled out adoption. What I was required to get was a statement from a physician that the prospective adopter was reasonably likely to live to the child's adulthood (of course, no one can predict whether someone might get hit by a bus or whatever). I also asked about what treatments the applicant was receiving, how compliant he/she was with those treatments and what the side effects/impacts of the diagnosis and the treatments would be. 

I don't know Whitney - only what I see on tv. I can see that she is morbidly obese and her mobility is limited. But I don't see any reason that I couldn't approve her based on that alone. She is physically capable of caring for an infant/child. I may not believe that she would be the best possible parent to a child. I may not think she is the sort of parent I would want to be. Neither of those is relevant. At least in the States where I practice, I don't have a good reason NOT to approve her.

The second decision point in private adoption is that most (not all) birth parents choose the individual/family (from home study approved families) who will adopt their child. So getting through the home study is hurdle 1. Depending on what you are open to, there could be a very long list of prospective adoptive parents for any child. Frankly - if you want a healthy white infant with no known risk factors, you are likely to wait a very long time. There are just many more prospective adoption parents for that child than there are children who need adoptive homes. If Whitney were open to children of another race; children with known medical conditions; children with risk factors like substance exposure in utero; her wait could be shorter. Even if no birth parent ever chose her, she could still adopt. Most agencies, when a birth parent elects NOT to choose an adoptive family, will place the baby with the family who has been waiting longest.

The story about the morbidly obese couple who adopted from China is somewhat ironic. Several years ago (at least five, as it's been that long since I worked in adoption) China became the first (and as far as I know, only) country to set an upward limit for BMI for prospective adoptive parents. This caused quite an uproar at the time. China did this for two reasons: 1) they stated they wanted Chinese children to go to the healthiest families possible (they had long had other age, health and other criteria that were stricter than other countries) and 2) they could. As with healthy infants in the United States, there were many fewer young, healthy children in China who needed homes than there were international families interested in adopting them. So they could (to put it horribly) "afford to be picky."

Finally - regarding adoption from foster care - I hate to see "had to adopt from foster care" though it is true that some parents turn to adoption from foster care because domestic infant adoption and/or intercountry adoption has not worked out for them for whatever reasons. But those parents are still lucky to become parents and even though those parents might not have been perfect, they did provide a family for a child or children who needed one. Adoption is all about finding families for children; it's not about finding children for families. I'm guessing those kids would prefer to have their parent(s), obese or not, than to grow up in foster care.

Really interesting information-thanks for sharing!

[mybuddyspence]

Oh how I love Todd. "...your litterbox of a house!"

The facial expressions of horror at Whitney's adoption storyline.

I would love to take him out for drinks so he could dish the dirt.

[LordOfLotion]

1 hour ago, aliya said:

They sound like the kids at my Girl Scout camp at the end of the summer, "We'll always be friends, forever and ever!" Please people, grow up. Let Buddy do is thing and let Heather get her life in gear and pay some attention to her children. 

Maybe it's from being an Air Force brat or living in DC with everyone being a transient, but I just don't get this need to hang on. People come, people go. Nothing's forever. Deal with it.  (and yes, I'll be playing the Grinch at the Christmas pageant this year)

I was heinously bullied in school. I couldn't wait to get out of there and ditch those people. I have a great life now.

[mybuddyspence]

47 minutes ago, Snarkastikate said:

 Missed the Buddy/Heather meeting.   Did she get the closure she craved? He was screwing around with other chicks behind her back,  right?

That sums it up pretty well. He kept going on about being on a journey to find himself, or some shit like that. 

[AliM]

I'm way behind tonight but you guys are killing it making me laugh

Is it possible that Whit is becoming frighteningly more fat?

[Elizzikra]

Quote

All that said, I'd have more respect for Twit if she adopted an older child and not a baby. 

Why?

Quote

 And these poor kids are often born to  addicted parents., they will have issues. 

Not true. Children who are placed through private domestic infant adoption are not always - or even often - born to addicted to parents. The most common reason that birth parents choose to place children for adoption is poverty. They love their kids and would love to parent them but feel they can't make it work financially. They often express a desire for their child to grow up in a more financially secure family and have more opportunities. 

Children who are placed for adoption from the public child welfare system may or may not come from parents with addiction issues. They may, or may not, have issues themselves and the issues they have may be caused by their parent's addiction but is often related to the trauma of being involved in the child welfare system. 

Quote

I'm going to be a contrarian here and say I agree with Glenn about getting married and having children in that order. I was a young widow. I know what it is to be a single mom - but my son and I started from the right place - two parents, together. We diminish men in our attempts to support women. We make fun of men in commercials and the movies, and then wonder why they play video games until they're 35 and avoid commitment. Especially in the black community, having a father in the home is becoming a rarity.  Single parenthood is a primary cause of female poverty. Can single mothers can raise wonderful children, of course, but it shouldn't be the first choice and isn't the best for the child or for society. All that said, I'd have more respect for Twit if she adopted an older child and not a baby. 

I'm not interested in a debate on social issues but I couldn't stop myself from disagreeing wholeheartedly. First of all, single parenthood is often a correlate, but not necessarily a cause of poverty. We agree that single women (and hopefully you will agree that single men as well) can raise wonderful children but if there are sufficient resources (financial, emotional, social and other) available, there's no reason that can't be someone's "first choice" for building their family. I don't agree that "two parents, together" is always the "right" place to start. I think there are a lot of things that are "good for society" whatever that means - and I don't think that there is one "best" way to make a family.

Quote

Is it possible that Whit is becoming frighteningly more fat?

On a more superficial note, I thought she looked lighter tonight than she has all season. Maybe it's just me.

Quote

yes, I'll be playing the Grinch at the Christmas pageant this year

Please post video.

Edited March 21, 2018 by Elizzikra

[mybuddyspence]

42 minutes ago, aliya said:

That's what it is! I couldn't put my finger on it, but it's the defying nature of much of her interaction with her parents. Like a 15 yr old. At this age, Twit should be starting to see that her parents may be right about some things. I don't find them to be terrible people and they have tried to do their best by her, tho they may have overdone it a bit and are too coddling when they need a firmer hand - or to step back and let her flounder on her own. 

I'm going to be a contrarian here and say I agree with Glenn about getting married and having children in that order. I was a young widow. I know what it is to be a single mom - but my son and I started from the right place - two parents, together. We diminish men in our attempts to support women. We make fun of men in commercials and the movies, and then wonder why they play video games until they're 35 and avoid commitment. Especially in the black community, having a father in the home is becoming a rarity.  Single parenthood is a primary cause of female poverty. Can single mothers can raise wonderful children, of course, but it shouldn't be the first choice and isn't the best for the child or for society. All that said, I'd have more respect for Twit if she adopted an older child and not a baby. 

Finally - folks, put the phones down! Look at the balloons and the life around you through your own eyes, not the camera lens.

Yes, yes, a thousand times yes to all of this!

[sainte-chapelle]

On 2018-03-16 at 2:46 PM, monagatuna said:

My big fat baby? So this one is about Babs and Glenn?

Water just came out of my nose! 

[WillowG]

Half a palm tree's so expensive now you have to move into Sweatnies attic?

[mybuddyspence]

Aw, the dance class ladies were so sweet. They deserve a Richard Simmons, not the queen of denial.

[Dot]

I can't watch the episode since direcTV Now also doesn't let me watch on TLC's app.

So, I have been reading the comments. Did someone say that Tal has now moved into Buddy's digs? If so, was there any explanation as to why he gave up his nice little house to take up quarters in a cramped, unventilated space?

Also, can 2 unmarried people adopt in NC?