Crazy, Stupid, Love (2011)

[Wiendish Fitch]

I confess I have yet to see this movie, and based on the mountainous scorn people on these boards have for it, I doubt I want to. Be that as it may, I've noticed Crazy, Stupid, Love is one of most popular movies to talk about around here (right up there with A League of Their Own and The Family Stone... huh, that rhymes), so here's a whole topic to the movie featuring Ryan Gosling just before he became a meme, and Julianne Moore as a character so unsympathetic, she should have been in The Family Stone.

[Spartan Girl]

I hate this movie so fucking much. I hate that everybody treats Emily's cheating like it was no big deal and it was all Cal's fault for not "fighting for his marriage." If Cal would have been the one cheating, everybody wouldn't have given Emily self-righteous lectures about her being the one to give up on him. Hell, nobody had any problem writing Cal off just for going with a bunch of women after he and Emily were split.

Okay, yeah, maybe it wasn't cool for him to do that for an ego boost and to make her jealous, but he was technically single. He didn't owe her anything. Emily, on the other hand, slept with another man while they were still married and wanted to skip right to a divorce. She sure as hell didn't try to save their marriage. You tell me whose the bigger asshole.

[EtheltoTillie]

1 hour ago, Spartan Girl said:

I hate this movie so fucking much. I hate that everybody treats Emily's cheating like it was no big deal and it was all Cal's fault for not "fighting for his marriage." If Cal would have been the one cheating, everybody wouldn't have given Emily self-righteous lectures about her being the one to give up on him. Hell, nobody had any problem writing Cal off just for going with a bunch of women after he and Emily were split.

Okay, yeah, maybe it wasn't cool for him to do that for an ego boost and to make her jealous, but he was technically single. He didn't owe her anything. Emily, on the other hand, slept with another man while they were still married and wanted to skip right to a divorce. She sure as hell didn't try to save their marriage. You tell me whose the bigger asshole.

Yes but I love the

Spoiler

Twist where Steve Carrell finds out that Emma Stone is dating Ryan, his dating coach.

[wingster55]

I hated how Emma Stone treated her father and Josh Groban in the movie. That doesn't get said enough I think. 

[Danny Franks]

I don't think Emma Stone's character treated either her father or Josh Groban badly. She was exasperated and pissed at her dad for crapping on her boyfriend, and she didn't love Josh Groban. There was no obligation for her to stay with him, and when he pushed things too far, she realised the relationship just wasn't what she wanted.

As for Emily, I was baffled when they started portraying her as a sympathetic, wronged woman, after she was so cold and cruel in the opening scenes. She cheats, blurts out she wants a divorce, and Cal is gone from the house seemingly the next day. I genuinely thought they were setting Marisa Tomei's character up as a new romance that would work out, but then she was just a crazy woman who apparently proved that his wife was the right woman for him.

And the message seemed to be, 'you're a schlubby, middle aged guy who doesn't try hard enough to look good. If you did, your wife would be happy with you.'

But by far the worst bit of the movie is the son's creepy, obsessive pursuit of Jessica. They played it as cute and romantic, when it was anything but. And even after Jessica called him out on being a creep, he still 'wins' when she apparently gives him naked pictures of herself (which also: What. The. Fuck?)

Having said all that, I do like the movie. It's probably my favourite Steve Carell performance, and definitely my favourite Ryan Gosling performance. He's genuinely funny, as the vain, slightly prissy lothario, and the clash of two completely different attitudes to life was amusing to watch. I thought Annaleigh Tipton was charming as the babysitter with a huge crush, and I always like Emma Stone. Kevin Bacon was fun as the sleazy love interest too.

I see it more as a movie with lots of good parts and performances, but a troubling underlying message.

Edited March 16, 2018 by Danny Franks

[dusang]

Yeah, I had problems with some of the messages (and reading your critiques can't argue with any of them) but I still can't quite bring myself to hate this as much as I hate The Family Stone.

[Spartan Girl]

32 minutes ago, Danny Franks said:

I don't think Emma Stone's character treated either her father or Josh Groban badly. She was exasperated and pissed at her dad for crapping on her boyfriend

True, but before all that she didn't seem the least bit concerned or involved on how he was doing or the fact that her parents were splitting off.  Maybe it all happened offscreen just to keep the plot twist a surprise, but still...

The son was way worse to him, accusing him of "stealing" his soul mate aka the babysitter.

[Athena]

28 minutes ago, Spartan Girl said:

True, but before all that she didn't seem the least bit concerned or involved on how he was doing or the fact that her parents were splitting off.  Maybe it all happened offscreen just to keep the plot twist a surprise, but still...

Yeah, I definitely think that is why they didn't even hint at it. It's cheap.

There are lots of things wrong with the movie and script, but I can't bring myself to dislike it either mainly because Steve Carell and Ryan Gosling are both great in it. Their friendship was the best part. The second best thing for me in this movie was the sweet chemistry between Emma Stone and Ryan Gosling. That was classic romcom territory there.

[Dandesun]

34 minutes ago, Athena said:

Yeah, I definitely think that is why they didn't even hint at it. It's cheap.

There are lots of things wrong with the movie and script, but I can't bring myself to dislike it either mainly because Steve Carell and Ryan Gosling are both great in it. Their friendship was the best part. The second best thing for me in this movie was the sweet chemistry between Emma Stone and Ryan Gosling. That was classic romcom territory there.

All excellent points. Plus, the gigantic fight with the neighbor Dad/friend, Carell, Gosling and Bacon was kind of hilarious. Especially at the end with the cops there.

The son's obsessive crush on Jessica was not cute, nor was his giving his Dad shit over it because Jessica had her own weird crush on Cal. That annoyed the shit out of me. Cal didn't know, he didn't fucking DO anything, he was kind of horrified and puzzled to find out about Jessica's crush on him (and the means of finding out was rather horrifying, too), and his son acts like Cal totally knew that Jessica was who he was crushing on (which he didn't until right at that moment, right?) and actively pursued her to 'steal' her away. That was so fucked up on so many levels.

I thought that the whole concept of 'your wife thinks you're schlubby and middle-aged and no longer desires you' was an interesting flip on how women are usually in that role as the schlubby, middle-aged in a rut person that the husband runs off to the young, vibrant hot mistress BUT it's a shitty 'life lesson' either way you play it. It reminds me of those 'how to' nonsense from the 50s where the housewife is encouraged to 'fix yourself up' for when the man comes home from his job, 'He wants to see you looking your best!' Fuck that. It's marriage, hell the whole point is being able to NOT be at your best all the time. It's what partnership is. And I kind of wish they had gone into more depth as to why Julianne Moore had her crisis in the first place as opposed to being some sort of cypher that Cal could continue to yearn for and Jessica could hate and the audience could be like 'what? They're getting back together? What?!'

So... yeah... a LOT of issues but I still weirdly enjoy it.

[JustaPerson]

Totally agree. As infuriating as Emily is, Ryan Gosling and Steve Carrel are really great in the movie plus Emma Stone and Ryan Gosling have great chemistry. I genuinely love their romance, and Jacob's scene with Cal at the bar at the end when he admits that he's in love with Hannah and is confused by it is really great. Not surprised this film led to 2 more films for Emma Stone and Ryan Gosling, culminating in La La Land.

[VCRTracking]

2 hours ago, Spartan Girl said:

True, but before all that she didn't seem the least bit concerned or involved on how he was doing or the fact that her parents were splitting off.  Maybe it all happened offscreen just to keep the plot twist a surprise, but still...

The son was way worse to him, accusing him of "stealing" his soul mate aka the babysitter.

 

1 hour ago, Athena said:

Yeah, I definitely think that is why they didn't even hint at it. It's cheap.

There are lots of things wrong with the movie and script, but I can't bring myself to dislike it either mainly because Steve Carell and Ryan Gosling are both great in it. Their friendship was the best part. The second best thing for me in this movie was the sweet chemistry between Emma Stone and Ryan Gosling. That was classic romcom territory there.

We were discussing the movie recently in the "Gender in Movies" thread concerning the double standard of how women who cheat in movies are treated less harshly than men. I said this about Emma Stone's character:

Quote

Also while the audience finding out the same time as Ryan Gosling's character that Emma Stone was the daughter of Steve Carell and Julianne Moore was funny, it does make me think that Stone's character was ridiculously self involved to not seem to care what was going on with her family! "Boo hoo Josh Groban won't propose to me!" How about you check up on your dad, because he's a fucking wreck right now!

I think the reason we like Carell and Gosling's friendship in the movie so much is that Gosling is the only one who's nice to him and sympathetic to him throughout the movie while his family and supposed loved ones basically treats Carell like shit! It's not as bad as the dogpiling that happens to Sarah Jessica Parker in The Family Stone but Hal has it rough.

Edited March 16, 2018 by VCRTracking

[wingster55]

5 minutes ago, VCRTracking said:

Also while the audience finding out the same time as Ryan Gosling's character that Emma Stone was the daughter of Steve Carell and Julianne Moore was funny, it does make me think that Stone's character was ridiculously self involved to not seem to care what was going on with her family! "Boo hoo Josh Groban won't propose to me!" How about you check up on your dad, because he's a fucking wreck right now!

^ Exactly.

Plus I didn't get her reaction when Groban said he wasn't sure about marriage for them. She let her friend get in her head, that she was way better than him and "how dare he not be sure about me! I'm clearly awesome!" 

[hendersonrocks]

Quote

Yeah, I had problems with some of the messages (and reading your critiques can't argue with any of them) but I still can't quite bring myself to hate this as much as I hate The Family Stone.

I can actually watch Crazy, Stupid, Love and get some enjoyment out of it - there are entire storylines that I enjoy, even. The very existence of The Family Stone just makes me angry, including when the person sitting next to me on the plane is watching it on their phone. (Which happened this morning.)

[Danny Franks]

2 hours ago, wingster55 said:

^ Exactly.

Plus I didn't get her reaction when Groban said he wasn't sure about marriage for them. She let her friend get in her head, that she was way better than him and "how dare he not be sure about me! I'm clearly awesome!" 

She was awesome, though. And Groban was dull as dishwater. Her friend was right.

Writing around obscuring her identity was awkward, but necessary for the big twist. Could it have been done better? Sure. The odd line about her family going through a tough time, or about needing to call her parents. Something to show she was concerned.

[Spartan Girl]

4 hours ago, VCRTracking said:

 

I think the reason we like Carell and Gosling's friendship in the movie so much is that Gosling is the only one who's nice to him and sympathetic to him throughout the movie while his family and supposed loved ones basically treats Carell like shit! It's not as bad as the dogpiling that happens to Sarah Jessica Parker in The Family Stone but Hal has it rough.

I did like their friendship, which is why I wish that Ryan had acted on Cal's behalf where Emily was concerned. Slugging the other guy was nice and all, but why not take Emily aside and say, "Look you really hurt him and you don't get the right to be mad when you were the one that started this whole mess"? Especially considering that he opens up to Emma on how his mom cheated on his dad and the fact that Cal reminded him of his dad. Someone other than the babysitter should have called out her crap.

Cal's disapproval of him dating his daughter was hypocritical, but to be fair, he hadn't seen him in weeks. Ryan left him high and dry while (unbeknownst to Cal) they were dating.  He hadn't seen the two of them dating and how different he was around her than all the other women he'd been picking up. It was only after he saw them at the graduation that he had his change of heart.

[wingster55]

3 hours ago, Danny Franks said:

She was awesome, though. And Groban was dull as dishwater. Her friend was right.

One thing for you to think that (although, based on what?) and another for her to think so. It's like Gina Linnetti Plus we didn't even know Groban's character. 

[Sandman]

On 3/16/2018 at 8:58 PM, wingster55 said:

And Groban was dull as dishwater. Her friend was right.

He's a self-delighted bore, and one of the funniest things about this movie is how much fun Groban is clearly having playing this narcissistic dullard. 

On 3/16/2018 at 1:36 PM, Dandesun said:

All excellent points. Plus, the gigantic fight with the neighbor Dad/friend, Carell, Gosling and Bacon was kind of hilarious. Especially at the end with the cops there.

My favourite moment in the movie has to be the little hysterical "Meep!" sound that Gosling emits when the cop tells the guys to "keep it in the family"! I howl every time.

[auntiemel]

I only really remember two things about this movie. The first is that it seems like Ryan Gosling is doing his best Scott Caan impression. The second is that the big fight scene starts with Julianne Moore being led in blindfolded to her surprise and saying, "This isn't something I'm going to have to clean up, is it?" and by the end, there she is, cleaning it up. Kind of a small moment, but I thought it was clever.

[Sandman]

On 6/14/2018 at 5:50 PM, auntiemel said:

... Julianne Moore being led in blindfolded to her surprise and saying, "This isn't something I'm going to have to clean up, is it?" and by the end, there she is, cleaning it up. Kind of a small moment, but I thought it was clever.

She knows her family.