S22.E11: Week 10

[Irlandesa]

12 minutes ago, hoosiermom said:

Should I watch this 3 hours of dreck after reading all your wonderful posts before tonight’s show or at all?

I think the only reason I continued to watch this dreck this season after never having watched The Bachelor is because of the spoilers of what happened.  This may be a lie I tell myself but I believe it as much as Arie probably believes he's following his heart. (Also there's  a podcast that I love.)

It's an interesting social and reality show experiment to look at footage they chose knowing what went down. And that last hour is kind of brutal and infuriating but also compelling reality TV in a weird way.

So yeah?  FF is your friend.

[Mabinogia]

2 hours ago, scenicbyway said:

Becca shouldn't be embarrassed, she didn't do anything wrong. 

She should be proud. She handled that crap way better than a lot of people would. She comes out of this looking the best of the three and she is free of that piece of shit fiancé who would have ended up cheating on her anyway. The only mistake she made was not dumping his ass the second he started saying he was thinking about Lauren. But then she might not have been in the running for the bachelorette gig which pays better and gives her a choice of men rather than being stuck with just the one. So really she did everything right. 

I feel sorry for Lauren because she's stuck with a guy who is going to get bored of her the second someone else comes along playing hard to get. She's the one who should be embarrassed for telling him she'll be waiting for him when he finally dumps his fiancé. That is just sad. 

[Etta Place]

After watching all 3 hours of that (unedited is great in theory but seriously, they could have edited some of that. No one needs to see an hour-long breakup that you are not personally part of), I've decided to take a cue from Maxine Waters for the final two hours.  "Reclaiming my time .... reclaiming my time."

[LennieBriscoe]

When Arie (and the camera-people) broke the news to Becca, and she appeared angry yet stoic and together, walking away, Arie was taken aback---because now he had a whole lot of dead air to fill!

What was probably figured on being a drawn-out scene of anguish, crying, and questioning, was given short shrift. Thus, a dumbfounded Arie walks all around, not knowing what now to say, 'cause Becca ain't givin' him or the show NOTHIN'! Hahahaha!

[Lamb18]

20 hours ago, Llama said:

20 hours ago, Mu Shu said:

I am ready to get into my delorean and go back in time to punch this possum asshole in the throat.  Get the fuck out!

I'll come get you (I'm in Chicago) and will drive you myself!!!

Everyone meet me at my brother's place in Prior Lake with your baseball bats and we'll head down to Arizona! We'll bring Uncle Gary with his cane!

[Wings]

16 minutes ago, LennieBriscoe said:

When Arie (and the camera-people) broke the news to Becca, and she appeared angry yet stoic and together, walking away, Arie was taken aback---because now he had a whole lot of dead air to fill!

What was probably figured on being a drawn-out scene of anguish, crying, and questioning, was given short shrift. Thus, a dumbfounded Arie walks all around, not knowing what now to say, 'cause Becca ain't givin' him or the show NOTHIN'! Hahahaha!

Yes.  I was amused watching the cameras follow theym both around the condo in circles, Becca avoiding them and Arie mindlessly wandering around trying to talk to her as per producers orders.  Get her to sit down and talk was their pathetic cry that failed, miserably.   An hour of dead air where a dramatic fight should have been.  Good work Becca!  

[nutty1]

And we wonder why ABC did this???

ABC Publicity

@ABC_Publicity
7h7 hours ago

New Release: ABC Wins Monday With @BachelorABC Finale Spiking by 22% to a Season High #ABCPublicity #TheBachelor

[JudyObscure]

4 minutes ago, Lamb18 said:

Everyone meet me at my brother's place in Prior Lake with your baseball bats and we'll head down to Arizona! We'll bring Uncle Gary with his cane!

You all should swing through Arkansas and pick up Raven and Tia.   Raven for her stiletto  skills and Tia for the background of cussing to add color to the proceedings.  Don't forget to have the camera crew meet you.  We viewers are short some promised drama.

[calpurnia99]

Her: OH My God I can't imagine my life without you

Him: I wanted those things for us too, but I just cant, you know, just give them to you if I'm in love with someone else. I am so sorry and I am so sorry we are here right now.  I know talking to you in person, and in this way,  and I know this seems cruel. But I want you to know how I'm feeling, I want you to be able to move forward, I know that is a lot for you to take in.

Her: well you finally saw me cry

long long long pause, her crying, him trying to look sad (concerned?)

Her: JUST GO (hands in face not looking at him)

Please just go

Him: Okay

He turns toward her as if expecting a hug but does not get up. 

sits there a few minutes starring and her..leans in toward her

Her: I cant look at you..like I dont...just leave

He doesnt move, sits there starring at her some more.

Him: Okay Im going to go

leans in again and stares at her. Long Long Long pause

 

Finaly gets up and walks out slowly. 

[LennieBriscoe]

HERE WE GO, PEEPS!

Is that a filled wine glass I see before me?  :-)

Edited March 7, 2018 by LennieBriscoe

[bosawks]

A middle seat in coach after that, fuck you ABC you bastards!

[JD5166]

10 minutes ago, LennieBriscoe said:

HERE WE GO, PEEPS!

Is that a filled wine glass I see before me?  :-)

I have been trying to not drink but after last nights shit show, I got one bottle to get me through! 

I have wondered a few thing since last night, did Lauren hold out and not have sex with him? She’s manipulative (that’s what I would have done lol) OR did the powers that be tell assface that she (Lauren) would be the next bachelorette, and he thought someone else might get to bang her....whereas he didn’t get to? 

If I was CH, these would be two of my questions!!! 

[LennieBriscoe]

12 minutes ago, JD5166 said:

I have wondered a few thing since last night, did Lauren hold out and not have sex with him? She’s manipulative (that’s what I would have done lol) OR did the powers that be tell assface that she (Lauren) would be the next bachelorette, and he thought someone else might get to bang her....whereas he didn’t get to? 

For all the show's and host's smarminess, sex seems to be a forbidden topic!

[Meowwww]

55 minutes ago, Lamb18 said:

Everyone meet me at my brother's place in Prior Lake with your baseball bats and we'll head down to Arizona! We'll bring Uncle Gary with his cane!

I am in New Richmond Wisconsin!   I am IN!!!

30 minutes ago, bosawks said:

A middle seat in coach after that, fuck you ABC you bastards!

Totally.  Ugh.  Talk about throwing her away. 

[Laurie4H]

4 hours ago, Sterling said:

 

JoJo tweeted that there were never cameras on their SafeHouse dates. 

But there were several scenes of Arie & Becca, making pizza, on the hammock, up to and obviously including the breakup.

Which makes me wonder if Arie let production in on his little plan all along, hence the filming.

Which makes me hate him that much more.

 

It’s all producer based.  If cameras are their it’s because it’s all part of this years plot.  Arie has nothing to do with this.

All if this is completely fake and scripted.  

I’m curious to why so many people believe this stuff is legit?

[Superpole2000]

I just hope this wasn't all orchestrated. If it was a genuine, surprising change of heart then okay. If this was orchestrated pre-proposal then this show is really scraping the bottom.

I have no problem with the candid filming of the breakup because that's the price everyone pays for being on this mess. It wasn't so hard a watch that I turned the channel. I'm pretty sure no one else turned the channel either. The only person who should be ashamed of themselves is Arie...although if this was preordained then everyone involved with the show should feel like dirt.

[Lamb18]

10 hours ago, Rainsong said:

A bus appears in a street scene with a reference to Chaska on its marquee.  Isn’t there a Chaska, MN?  And Becca is from Minnesota!  Hmmm….

Yes, there is and I drive through it on the way to my brother's place in Prior Lake.

[sasha206]

Easily the WORST acted break up scene ever, aside from Becca and her ex boyfriend in Peru.  I can't believe people are acting like this was a real relationship, real breakup.  

1 hour ago, Laurie4H said:

It’s all producer based.  If cameras are their it’s because it’s all part of this years plot.  Arie has nothing to do with this.

All if this is completely fake and scripted.  

I’m curious to why so many people believe this stuff is legit?

Thank you!

The acting is truly awful.  I'm shocked people are giving this legitimacy.

[violet and green]

5 minutes ago, sasha206 said:

Easily the WORST acted break up scene ever, aside from Becca and her ex boyfriend in Peru.  I can't believe people are acting like this was a real relationship, real breakup.  

I'm also bemused why people are acting as if Becca is a saint. I mean we should have a national day or adoration and mourning, the way people are going on, and slagging off Poor Old Grampa Possum.

Becca flicked her ex-fiance who she'd been involved with, for better or worse, for seven years, with a far more callous manner than poor bumbling no-idea Arie demonstrated. (Yeah, he hung around waiting for a hug like a little boy, bugging her as she rummaged up a few tears. Ross slunk off, having flown to Peru to embarrass himself on national TV, leaving his wilting flowers on the stairs.) Yet saintly Becca has spent probably all up seven days with this doofus, and now according to the internet he's a sociopath and narcissist!

[Adeejay]

2 hours ago, Palomar said:

I remember speculation that Molly was already seeing Jason and if not they were at least in contact.  I'm sure they would not admit that if it had happened. And it went from him dumping her on live TV (even though she knew it was heading that way) to Molly and Jason on the couch the next day (or was it the same special....it is hard to remember) pretty much all over each other.  It was pretty shocking, thus the Molly hate besides the Jason hate.  

I read Melissa's book and she wasn't quite honest with the way things really went down.  She admitted that after she left "the Bachelor bubble", she realized that while she liked Jason, she wasn't in love with him.  She missed Ty (husband) and resumed contact.  The calls between her and Jason became less and less.  The show wrapped right before Thanksgiving and by Christmas it was over. What got to Melissa was the way Jason handled the whole thing.  She didn't expect him to declare his love for Molly and to get dumped on national television. 

[reggiejax]

28 minutes ago, sasha206 said:

The acting is truly awful.  I'm shocked people are giving this legitimacy.

Well, you get what you pay for. I mean Lauren's biggest role before this was "Panicky Idiot #3" in San Andreas, one of The Rock's lesser works. 

[Irlandesa]

24 minutes ago, violet and green said:

Becca flicked her ex-fiance who she'd been involved with, for better or worse, for seven years, with a far more callous manner than poor bumbling no-idea Arie demonstrated.

But Becca had done the breakup thing with him about a year prior.  So why wouldn't she just flick him away?  They weren't together. They weren't engaged.  They were exes. She gave him exactly what the ex deserved, a clear no.  She didn't yell or scream or put him down.  She was confused and told him that she didn't want him back but wished him well. 

I don't see that as callous for an ex.  It's perfect ex behavior.

[Refresh]

5 hours ago, Refresh said:

re: Lauren & Arie. I need to go back and rewatch to hear what she said but on their final date this episode I believe she said something to him like "you didn't remember meeting me in Dallas".  So they'd apparently met before the show at some point? I'm going to find the exact minute of the episode and update my post but that is an interesting piece of information if it is as I heard it. 

Not to distract from all this other stuff but the way they've chosen to showcase/edit Lauren is so odd that if Lauren & Arie had some kind of history that might be important. Especially since he was kind of a last minute Bachelor switch. Ugh this show. 

Found it - The conversation about them meeting before  It comes at 44:03 in the episode.

setting: on train to Machu Picchu

Arie: It feels like it's been forever since I saw you step out of that limo

Lauren: yeah

Arie: And it's also funny like how it went by like that (snaps fingers). You know?

Lauren: Yeah I agree. Like I can still picture the first day, like, everything that happened.

Arie: yeah

Lauren: Like, me walking up to you and you forgetting that you met me in Dallas (giggle) and like me tripping, going into the mansion

Arie: (bending over laughing) yeah

[violet and green]

1 hour ago, Irlandesa said:

But Becca had done the breakup thing with him about a year prior.  So why wouldn't she just flick him away?  They weren't together. They weren't engaged.  They were exes. She gave him exactly what the ex deserved, a clear no.  She didn't yell or scream or put him down.  She was confused and told him that she didn't want him back but wished him well. 

I don't see that as callous for an ex.  It's perfect ex behavior.

She swatted him off like a fly. Regardless of when or how it ended, she spent seven years with him, she was engaged to him, but she treated him like an annoyance for making his ill-timed pleas for reconsideration. She had no compassion for him, no kindness, no understanding, no caring for the big fool whatsoever. Arie may have hung around like a bad smell pointlessly asking, Are you okay? But at least he showed some concern for her emotional state at his rejection. On TV.

[PreBabylonia]

13 hours ago, JudyObscure said:

BTW. Lauren isn't shallow or stupid because she has blonde hair and all the remarks about how all blondes look just alike and we can't tell them apart is offensive.

Hmmmm I don't think Lauren is shallow or stupid because she has (dyed) blonde hair, I just think she's shallow and stupid based on her very limited conversation. I think her vocabulary may consist of 400 words, if that. My dog knows more than that (but he is a redhead...) I think most of us think the blondes on this show look alike, not in real life. They all have straight blonde hair past their shoulders with centre parts, their features are symmetrical but without any striking features, and a few of them were called Lauren. I actually think this season had more generic looking blondes than any other one I've seen. The brunettes stood out mostly because they were more unique.

13 hours ago, Losemynumber said:

The DM to Bekah said , “ just realized you were born the same year as my first 2 on 1”

what did I miss? Bekah born in 1995. Arie’s 1st 2 on 1 was not in 1995!

I was wondering if he meant....that was the year he had his first threesome? Kind of a sleazy flirtation. Bekah seems to be implying that he was reaching out to her not as an engaged man but as a player.

12 hours ago, Jazzhands said:

Breaking an engagement is not unforgivable, but the way he did it was.  He let Becca travel from her home in the Midwest to wherever that safe house was located, thinking she was going to have a “happy couple” visit, and then he broke her heart and humiliated her with cameras rolling.  He refused to leave despite her repeated requests in order to get more footage.  He chose to be a reality TV star rather than a decent human being in that moment.  He showed his character — more specifically, lack thereof — in making that choice.  

I don’t think that Lauren is an idiot if she decided she wanted to have a relationship with him after he changed his mind.  The whole concept and production of the show is far removed from reality, and so rushed and manipulated by producers, that I could easily see how either the lead or F1, or both, could have second thoughts after the proposal, especially because they’re then separated for the most part while the show is airing, only allowed to be together occasionally and in secret.

But I do think Lauren an idiot if she stays with him after watching the footage broadcast last night.  If Arie either lacks compassion entirely, or worse yet agrees to override it for the sake of a TV show, he’s not a good choice for a husband. Maybe he’ll propose to Lauren and ABC will agree to televise the wedding but he’ll get cold feet. Instead of telling her privately, the producers will have her show up at the altar with her family and friends, in front of the cameras, and he’ll dump her at the altar.  Imagine the ratings!  

I think it was Maya Angelou who said, “When people show you who they are, believe them.” Arie showed himself to be cruel or at the very least a coward last night — both of these women deserve better. 

Yes, agree entirely on that first paragraph. I read in US magazine online I think, that Lauren WON'T be watching the Final Rose. Sounds like she knew what was going on and wants to protect her little sensitivities. If you're going to go for it with Arie, I think it makes a lot more sense to get the full picture and see if he's what you really want. Watching him this season would have to be completely disillusioning.

[Irlandesa]

29 minutes ago, violet and green said:

Regardless of when or how it ended, she spent seven years with him, she was engaged to him, but she treated him like an annoyance for making his ill-timed pleas for reconsideration. She had no compassion for him, no kindness, no understanding, no caring for the big fool whatsoever.

I don't believe they were engaged.  Becca mentioned that Arie was her first engagement.  And I thought wishing him well was kindness. 

But I guess the reason why I thought it was perfect ex behavior is because sometimes the biggest kindness is to draw firm boundaries and stick with them.

[Eyeland Baby]

Me, when he dumped Lauren in Peru surrounded by flowers and alpacas: "Awww, alpacas of sadness." Then when he proposed to Becca: "Alpacas of happiness!" Then when he dumped Becca, my mom said "It was alpaca lies!!!" 

[MerBearHou]

12 minutes ago, Eyeland Baby said:

Me, when he dumped Lauren in Peru surrounded by flowers and alpacas: "Awww, alpacas of sadness." Then when he proposed to Becca: "Alpacas of happiness!" Then when he dumped Becca, my mom said "It was alpaca lies!!!" 

Very Clever, Eyeland Baby Mom!

[sasha206]

8 hours ago, PreBabylonia said:

Hmmmm I don't think Lauren is shallow or stupid because she has (dyed) blonde hair, I just think she's shallow and stupid based on her very limited conversation. I think her vocabulary may consist of 400 words, if that. My dog knows more than that (but he is a redhead...) I think most of us think the blondes on this show look alike, not in real life. They all have straight blonde hair past their shoulders with centre parts, their features are symmetrical but without any striking features, and a few of them were called Lauren. I actually think this season had more generic looking blondes than any other one I've seen. The brunettes stood out mostly because they were more unique.

YES!

If 99.95% of the women in the house had Bekka's short, dark, pixie, worn the exact same way, we'd have the same convo about them looking alike.  

I'm not judging Lauren's intelligence on her hair color but rather the fact she is inarticulate.

[Palomar]

11 hours ago, Adeejay said:

I read Melissa's book and she wasn't quite honest with the way things really went down.  She admitted that after she left "the Bachelor bubble", she realized that while she liked Jason, she wasn't in love with him.  She missed Ty (husband) and resumed contact.  The calls between her and Jason became less and less.  The show wrapped right before Thanksgiving and by Christmas it was over. What got to Melissa was the way Jason handled the whole thing.  She didn't expect him to declare his love for Molly and to get dumped on national television. 

Right, the shocking factor WAS the way he handled it, dumping her on national TV and immediately after, declaring his love for Molly. At the time it was the most shocking thing that had ever happened for this franchise.  I remember Melissa saying under normal circumstances she probably wouldn't have even gone out on a date with Jason...he wasn't her type.  It really is kind of like the Stockholm Syndrome since there only is one guy (or girl) and suddenly that person is the most important person in the world and is the difference between you traveling the world and going home feeling rejected.

This time it was still shocking, but the second time is never as shocking as the first time.

[Mu Shu]

15 hours ago, Lamb18 said:

Everyone meet me at my brother's place in Prior Lake with your baseball bats and we'll head down to Arizona! We'll bring Uncle Gary with his cane!

I mean shit, the demon Pazuzu could have been dropping windows on his possum paws and making the place smell like shit, and dumb fuck would still have sat there looking like a consumptive.

GET OUT!!

Edited March 7, 2018 by Mu Shu

[ByTor]

13 hours ago, violet and green said:

I'm also bemused why people are acting as if Becca is a saint.

Same.  As mentioned before, she talked more about being embarrassed than about losing some great love...but then again, she also seemed more fixated on how big her ring is. Also, she over and over again told him to just leave, yet she walked into another room and kept the door opened, I'm assuming so her sad sad face would still be on film.  If that were me, I'd yell at him to GTFO, get into another room, yell something at the crew about getting the cameras out of my face, and lock the door until everybody left after figuring out I wouldn't play along.

[truthaboutluv]

38 minutes ago, ByTor said:

Also, she over and over again told him to just leave, yet she walked into another room and kept the door opened

Actually, after she initially stood up and went to get her suitcases, then he said he would leave, she walked into what I assumed was the bathroom and firmly shut the door and stayed inside there sobbing. This went on for awhile, until Arie came stupidly knocking asking if she was okay (the hell) and she told him again to leave through the closed door. 

[ByTor]

6 minutes ago, truthaboutluv said:

Actually, after she initially stood up and went to get her suitcases, then he said he would leave, she walked into what I assumed was the bathroom and firmly shut the door and stayed inside there sobbing. This went on for awhile, until Arie came stupidly knocking asking if she was okay (the hell) and she told him again to leave through the closed door. 

Actually, a while later she went into the bedroom (or whatever room it was) and did not close the door.  If she didn't want her sad sad face on camera, she should have stayed in that bathroom until they all left.

Edited March 7, 2018 by ByTor

[StatisticalOutlier]

16 hours ago, Irlandesa said:

I don't believe they were engaged.  Becca mentioned that Arie was her first engagement.  And I thought wishing him well was kindness. 

But I guess the reason why I thought it was perfect ex behavior is because sometimes the biggest kindness is to draw firm boundaries and stick with them.

I have no personal knowledge, of course, but I wouldn't be surprised if Becca and ex-boyfriend Ross broke up because he wouldn't commit to marriage.  Maybe I'm stereotyping and thinking it was Becca who wanted to be married and not Ross, but she doesn't seem like the type to want a long-term relationship without being married.  I think because she was 19 when they started dating, she was thinking it would lead to marriage and gave it a nice long try, but eventually gave up.

If that was the case, and if I were in her shoes, I'd be quite annoyed by him showing up declaring that if anyone is going to be proposing, it's going to be him.  Sorry, fella, you had your chance.  And I don't think that it was a coincidence that his change of heart coincided with her being on the Bachelor.  He had plenty of time to contact her without having to fly to Peru to do it in front of cameras.

I think she was kind, given the circumstances, especially because his play could have been massively fucking up what she had with Arie (which in retrospect, of course...), and she had nothing to do with it.

 

On 3/6/2018 at 7:31 AM, JudyObscure said:

BTW. Lauren isn't shallow or stupid because she has blonde hair and all the remarks about how all blondes look just alike and we can't tell them apart is offensive.

As far as not being able to tell the blondes apart, I honestly can't find Lauren in the photo at the top of this article:

https://nypost.com/2018/02/27/the-std-that-keeps-most-contestants-from-competing-on-the-bachelor/

After (too) much study and eventually only by process of elimination, I think she's the one in the striped dress in the front row, but I think that one actually looks like Trista.

Uh, after looking at that picture for a long time, my eyes got kind of blurry and somehow the whiteness of the everybody's teeth came to the foreground.  Interesting (and horrifying) visual effect.

Edited March 7, 2018 by StatisticalOutlier
add mention of the cameras; it's always about the cameras

[PreBabylonia]

1 hour ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

I have no personal knowledge, of course, but I wouldn't be surprised if Becca and ex-boyfriend Ross broke up because he wouldn't commit to marriage.  Maybe I'm stereotyping and thinking it was Becca who wanted to be married and not Ross, but she doesn't seem like the type to want a long-term relationship without being married.  I think because she was 19 when they started dating, she was thinking it would lead to marriage and gave it a nice long try, but eventually gave up.

If that was the case, and if I were in her shoes, I'd be quite annoyed by him showing up declaring that if anyone is going to be proposing, it's going to be him.  Sorry, fella, you had your chance.  And I don't think that it was a coincidence that his change of heart coincided with her being on the Bachelor.  He had plenty of time to contact her without having to fly to Peru to do it in front of cameras.

I think she was kind, given the circumstances, especially because his play could have been massively fucking up what she had with Arie (which in retrospect, of course...), and she had nothing to do with it.

 

As far as not being able to tell the blondes apart, I honestly can't find Lauren in the photo at the top of this article:

https://nypost.com/2018/02/27/the-std-that-keeps-most-contestants-from-competing-on-the-bachelor/

After (too) much study and eventually only by process of elimination, I think she's the one in the striped dress in the front row, but I think that one actually looks like Trista.

Uh, after looking at that picture for a long time, my eyes got kind of blurry and somehow the whiteness of the everybody's teeth came to the foreground.  Interesting (and horrifying) visual effect.

I agree, I think she is the most likely candidate. Interesting that she is one of the two immediately beside Arie, while Becca is in the back row beside the other Bekka. Unless it was height related. Kendall on the other hand is immediately distinctive and far more interesting than Lauren (physically and mentally). And is standing immediately beside Arie as well. 

Regarding the boyfriend, he muttered something about he thought something was going to come of this, it seems clear to me that the producers egged him on and made it sound like Becca was pining for him and was likely to leave with him. Not that I remember much of that scene though - I pretty much fell asleep for most of it, as I did with Becca and Lauren's final dates. I do think it is interesting that Becca came across much more vibrantly once they were coupled - i.e. the video clips of them together. I was thinking how difficult it must be for some of them to look natural with cameras thrust close to them. I couldn't talk without becoming distracted and I'd cringe at being expected to make out while filmed. So I definitely think I underestimated her during the season. Lauren however is exactly the same - like watching paint dry. And now I really am seeing Arie as more and more like a possum. I was so very wrong about him.

[halkatla]

Arie is a disgusting idiot! OMG I´m totally not a part of the "bachelor nation" and I love wrong reasons everything, but I cannot get on board with this awful, awful mess. What was he thinking? It´s just... I have no clue what that was. It was so obvious that he wanted Lauren, so why did he send her home and become engaged to Becca? Sorry, I´m not asking for an answer, my mind is just blown trying to understand this. He chose to make himself look like the biggest fool by doing this. I always feel bad when I watch people doing cringy things, and this just blew up my cringy-ness scale.  If my son did this to himself on tv, I honestly wouldn´t know how to handle it and I feel sorry for his family having to watch this after everything went so well (boring, but well) up to that point.

 

I liked Arie´s season, I thought he was cute, cool, not too smart but just okay and now... He´s obviously the biggest dick in bachelor history and this thing with Lauren is the tackiest thing in said history. Yuck. And he was so ugly all through the break-up scene, he looked very off.

Edited March 8, 2018 by halkatla

[PhysNerd]

On 3/6/2018 at 10:03 PM, violet and green said:

I'm also bemused why people are acting as if Becca is a saint. I mean we should have a national day or adoration and mourning, the way people are going on, and slagging off Poor Old Grampa Possum.

Becca flicked her ex-fiance who she'd been involved with, for better or worse, for seven years, with a far more callous manner than poor bumbling no-idea Arie demonstrated. (Yeah, he hung around waiting for a hug like a little boy, bugging her as she rummaged up a few tears. Ross slunk off, having flown to Peru to embarrass himself on national TV, leaving his wilting flowers on the stairs.) Yet saintly Becca has spent probably all up seven days with this doofus, and now according to the internet he's a sociopath and narcissist!

Becca and her ex broke up a year ago.  Her ex waited until she was on a tv show to propose to her.  That sort of behavior is creepy and opportunistic.  I've dealt with men like Becca's ex before.  You have to be very cold and direct when dealing with them.  Being sweet and kind only makes them think there is a chance.  Her ex had plenty of time to speak to her, but chose to wait until the last second.  Her ex was a classic manipulator.  I can't believe Becca would stay with such a creep for 7 years.  She wasted her youth on that loser.  

Anyway, I don't think Becca was ever truly in love with Ari.  At best, maybe there was some lust, but definitely not love. I have two reasons for this:
1) During the breakup scene, she talked about being embarrassed if I remember correctly.  When someone is truly hurting during a breakup, all they can think about is the pain of losing their significant other.  The thought of how this would look to the rest of the world wouldn't cross their mind even if they are being filmed.  
2) She was able to accept the offer of becoming the Bachelorette despite the fact that her fiancee recently dumped her.  Even though their relationship was very short, it would still take time to get over the fact that she lost a fiancee (not just a boyfriend).  

That being said, I don't blame Becca for not loving Ari.  He seems like a loser to me and just about any woman (with the exception of Lauren and Annelise) was too good for him. I don't think Ari is an evil person, but he is very self-absorbed, indecisive and non-committal.  At 36, he is still young, but he has the self-absorption of someone in their early 20s.  He is definitely not mature enough for marriage.  I suspect he won't be ready even when he is 50.  Men like him are always looking for the next best thing. Lauren better watch out.  



 

[truthaboutluv]

3 hours ago, PhysNerd said:

Becca and her ex broke up a year ago.  Her ex waited until she was on a tv show to propose to her.  That sort of behavior is creepy and opportunistic.  I've dealt with men like Becca's ex before.  You have to be very cold and direct when dealing with them.  Being sweet and kind only makes them think there is a chance.  Her ex had plenty of time to speak to her, but chose to wait until the last second.  Her ex was a classic manipulator.  I can't believe Becca would stay with such a creep for 7 years.  She wasted her youth on that loser.  

And from what I read online, her sister went off on social media, in response to some of the easily impressed viewers who were all "Team Ross", "Ross should be the next Bachelor", "Becca's an idiot"; after the episode where he showed up aired. She essentially confirmed what you noted that he was manipulative and emotionally abusive and that Becca had tried breaking up with him numerous times when he wouldn't accept no and go away. She talked about him showing up at Becca's job, where I think she eventually had to threaten him with going to authorities before he finally accepted that she meant it and they were over. 

And as for the deifying of Becca and vilifying of Arie, as I said in another post - welcome to Bachelor Nation. It's what viewers of this show do. Every season, no matter how much people know the producers edit the show, that some people get better edits than others but doesn't always tell the true story of who they are, how many times some of the same people who were held up as saints show their true colors later, people still jump on an outraged bandwagon. I am hardly surprised that Arie's been tarred and feathered, when Rachel last season was dragged for nothing more than not picking Peter.

People called her a bitch, petty, an asshole, she was slut shamed, etc. I will never forget the comment that Rachel's telling Peter she was living her best life was one of the rudest and meanest things a lead had ever said to a contestant. Because Peter admitted he was wrong for telling her she'd have a mediocre life so she should have just smiled and happily accepted it. Anything else and it meant she was an awful bitch. It's what Bachelor Nation does. And I'm sorry but Arie didn't help his cause by one, already having a sketchy and shady reputation coming into the season and some of his actions, like essentially emotionally cheating (I'm still not sure I buy they never saw each other before the breakup with Becca) with Lauren and securing that she would definitely want him back before ending things with Becca. And in the days before ending things with Becca, still talking to her like nothing was wrong and discussing looking at houses or whatever. 

Dude was an ass, plain and simple, in my opinion. If it works out for him and the dullard Lauren and they live happily ever after, good for him. But yeah, he's going to get a dragging until another season and new crop of contestants because at the end of the day, while he's not the most evil man in the world, what he did was still shitty and dickish. 

[Mabinogia]

14 minutes ago, truthaboutluv said:

And as for the deifying of Becca and vilifying of Arie, as I said in another post - welcome to Bachelor Nation. It's what viewers of this show do. Every season, no matter how much people know the producers edit the show, that some people get better edits than others but doesn't always tell the true story of who they are

I look at what we see as a show, I LOVE Show Becca. I HATE Show Arie. Does that mean I would hate Arie if I met him in person? No clue. I might, I might not. I might hate Becca if I met her (but she has a corgi so I'm pretty sure I'd want her as my BFF). This is a forum about a tv show so when we are all going off about how much we hate one or love another it is how much we hate or love the character they were made into by production. If they can't take it, they shouldn't be on the show. In a few weeks I will forget Arie picked Lauren until I see news of their breakup or him cheating. They are just characters on a tv show for me and I hate or love them as much as I hate Rumple and love Regina on Once.

I think everyone views this show in their own way, but that is how I view it and how strong my feelings are about what happens. About as strong as they are for fictional characters (which is kind of what they are).

[violet and green]

7 hours ago, truthaboutluv said:

And as for the deifying of Becca and vilifying of Arie, as I said in another post - welcome to Bachelor Nation.

Oh, thanks, but I have been watching this shit show since season one. In the dark ages pre-social media. Back then little kids didn't hang themselves because of vicious things said about them online.

11 hours ago, PhysNerd said:

That being said, I don't blame Becca for not loving Ari.

That is hilarious!

6 hours ago, Mabinogia said:

I think everyone views this show in their own way, but that is how I view it and how strong my feelings are about what happens. About as strong as they are for fictional characters (which is kind of what they are).

Snark is one thing. But people seem to be losing sight of the fact it is a) a reality tv show edited for maximum drama, outrage and, they hope, ensuing ratings and b) the show will throw anyone onto a turnpike if it leads to frothing fans and ratings and c) these are real people, not cartoon villains, or 'fictional characters' and much as many may deplore their highly edited antics, bad decisions, horrible hair, hilarious cardigans and thoughtless comments, etc, etc they are as fragile and vulnerable as the next person.

I can't get over pictures of Gia being posted on another thread, and we all know how poor Gia ended her life...

They are not the brightest tools in the shed, Arie is a player, and Lauren is a serial fiancee, so it is hard to imagine this all going ahead and working out well, after this horrible start, but I think we should cut them some slack at this point for being humans and not handling things in the most perfect manner possible on this televised dating show, etc. Even just a fraction of the enormous slack being cut for Boring Becca. And, all previous edits aside, I do not expect to fine her less boring on her next outing; she is not and never will be my type of constestant or Bachelorette, and given how every single one before her has had the life ironed out of them I do not expect her saintly presence to be anything but even more grating, with better outfits and hair styling. But such is life.

[nicgwatchingtv]

On 3/6/2018 at 8:44 PM, violet and green said:

She swatted him off like a fly. Regardless of when or how it ended, she spent seven years with him, she was engaged to him, but she treated him like an annoyance for making his ill-timed pleas for reconsideration. She had no compassion for him, no kindness, no understanding, no caring for the big fool whatsoever. Arie may have hung around like a bad smell pointlessly asking, Are you okay? But at least he showed some concern for her emotional state at his rejection. On TV.

According to Becca's sister, the ex had been harassing Becca quite a bit and she's asked him to stop and leave her alone quite a bit. I don't blame her at all for being pissed (and feeling no compassion towards him) that he'd do it again. Especially on tv, when he probably felt she'd be forced into another interaction after she'd made clear she didn't want one.

It's actually one of the reasons I'm surprised Becca is willing to trust the producers again. They screwed her in more than one way this season.

Edited March 10, 2018 by nicgwatchingtv

[fib]

On 3/6/2018 at 11:40 AM, hnygrl said:

The way this show is going? I have a prediction:

How much y'all wanna bet there's gonna be a proposal tonight? New Neal Lane ring and everything?

The man has no class. None. It wouldn't even occur to him that proposing to one girl one (television) day after dumping another would be considered crass and classless to the rest of the civilized world.

Watch...I betcha anything he's gonna take a knee tonight.

And push Flapjack right out of his top 5 worse Bachelors of all time slot. Y'all watch. The man has no tact, no diplomacy, no class. He's gonna do it.

And get BOOO'D for it.

Wow.  You called it!

[StatisticalOutlier]

19 hours ago, nicgwatchingtv said:

It's actually one of the reasons I'm surprised Becca is willing to trust the producers again. They screwed her in more than one way this season.

That's what gets me.  I know you have to be a little bit insane to want to be on one of these shows in the first place, but that allows you to think, "I'll be different.  I'll be able to stay above the show's bullshit and the contrived scenarios and be my real self and come out victorious." 

But in Becca's case, she's experienced first hand what the show can and will do to people, and she's hopping in bed with them.  I truly don't understand it.