S06.E08: Robert's Story

[magemaud]

https://starcasm.net/archives/385497

this article clarifies a few things 

[Concerned]

Noticed he was an Eagles fan. Too bad he died just before they won their first Super Bowl a month ago.

[skippy]

6 hours ago, KateHearts said:

It's standard medical practice to give people blood thinners (heparin) after any surgery which may cause them to be immobilized afterwards- joint replacement surgery, open heart surgery, any prolonged procedure or hospitalization. I'm sure this precaution was taken. It is shocking how quickly a blood clot can form from immobility.  That said, I was a little surprised that Dr. Now just cold-turkey'd the opiod pain meds- unless the editing was such that you didn't see that. The only drug that can truly cause death if you withdraw abruptly is alcohol- but those withdrawing from narcotics and other drugs are pretty darn miserable for a period of time after quitting.

I'm curious about the third brother- the mom mentioned that there were two other brothers who weren't very nice to Robert growing up. And the childhood picture of the three of them had one boy blurred out. No more mention of the other brother.

One brother died.

[skippy]

38 minutes ago, MonicaM said:

I'm not a big fan of Dr. Now for several reasons, and one of them is that he seems to be very dismissive of complaints about pain.  Yes, he works with a segment of the population who come up with every excuse in the book, and are probably prone to addiction, but cutting someone off opioids cold turkey seems cruel.  I'm not a medical person, but I would think tapering down the drugs would be easier for the patient to handle.  Plus, at his size and inactivity level, I believe he really does have some legitimate pain, so why not offer him some prescription strength, non addictive anti inflammatory meds to give him some relief.  I've had several surgeries and I can't imagine if the doctor had tried to give me minimal pain meds afterward.

I hate the thought that he spent his last days in pain.  

I'll bet the farm Dr. Now did not cut him off cold turkey.  A hospital is the safest place to come down and detox.

[xwordfanatik]

36 minutes ago, ButterQueen said:

I'll start by saying I am sad that Robert died, and I wish peace to his mom and Kathryn.

Robert showed who he truly was at the very beginning of the episode, first with his grocery list -- NO VEGETABLES and  then when he JUST HAD to eat more fried chicken.  He was a man-boy who loved being babied by his mom and Katherine.  I was shocked when he called Dr Now after his fall, describing injuries that he would never be able to see, and likely did not have....and he was disappointed that Dr Now wanted him to push on and not stop traveling and take more pain meds.  I am very disappointed and sad that he wasted this great opportunity to save his life.  He wanted to continue life in bed, with someone holding his penis while he urinated.  He was successful in weight loss because his calories were restricted...and refusing to even get out of bed was so childish.  I thought both Kathryn and Robert spoke horribly to each other from the get go.  His friend who made the trip did not seem to want to help at all.  

I really doubt Dr Now stopped his pain medications cold turkey.  Weaning off of opioids is not pretty.  They probably chose not to show that.

I forgot to mention how little Robert cared about other people's comfort.  He has Kathryn strip him naked as soon as he gets in the hotel room, with his friends there, and when he decides to change rooms, he only puts on a shirt for the ride to the new room.  He was very self-absorbed.

He reminded me a lot of Sean, from a season or three ago.  The only differences were, Robert talked a lot faster, and had a girlfriend.

[cynicat]

39 minutes ago, MonicaM said:

I'm not a big fan of Dr. Now for several reasons, and one of them is that he seems to be very dismissive of complaints about pain.  Yes, he works with a segment of the population who come up with every excuse in the book, and are probably prone to addiction, but cutting someone off opioids cold turkey seems cruel.  I'm not a medical person, but I would think tapering down the drugs would be easier for the patient to handle.  Plus, at his size and inactivity level, I believe he really does have some legitimate pain, so why not offer him some prescription strength, non addictive anti inflammatory meds to give him some relief.  I've had several surgeries and I can't imagine if the doctor had tried to give me minimal pain meds afterward.

We really have no idea what really happens medically.  They film for months and months, only to show a very small portion of the material.  I agree with calpurnia99--I'm sure he was given pain control.  However, compared to dilaudid , everything else must seem like water.  That drug is about as powerful as it gets.

I'm also a little suspicious that there was a lot more wrong with Robert that showed up in his tests, and that's why Dr. Now wanted him to lose that much more weight prior to a weight loss surgery than his usual candidates, and was  vehement that he be mobile.  Robert was on so many meds that had to have impacted his cardiovascular system, which based on his history and massive weight were more than likely highly compromised already.  (By the way, someone asked why he wasn't on antidepressants--he was on Prozac, among a ton of other things.)

This is the exact situation Dr. Now and other doctors who deal with morbidly obese people mention all the time.  Once something goes wrong, it snowballs and quickly gets out of control.  Add to that the fact that Robert seemed to stop fighting and you get the sad ending we saw.  

[Cherrio]

I did not see any withdrawal symptoms or behavior pre-surgery, so that part was hinky to me.   I think what they did was continue to give him the narcotic (Dilaudid) in a smaller dose or less frequently.   Or someone was medicating him with meds he brought with him.  Maybe he was doing it himself.

What we did see after surgery was the behavior of someone going thru withdrawal. Although he was certainly addicted to both food and drugs, I think the drugs came first.

I agree with Butter Queens assessment of him, being a man-boy, totally self-absorbed and spoiled. Even though he died the night he begged her to stay, that clearly showed who he cared about and it wasn't Kathryn.   She clearly took excellent care of him, even though it was not anything close to a relationship.  He couldn't see past his selfishness to let her go home, take a shower and relax after taking care of him all day and night.    The poster here that knows her even confirmed he couldn't even let her enjoy a night out without ruining it for her.

Kathryn seems like a decent and caring person. She deserves a happy and healthy life and maybe find someone to share it with.

I know she is mourning now, but I hope she can get some help to navigate and look back thru her life so going forward it doesn't repeat itself.

[JJ1]

I still don’t understand why Robert went to Houston for treatment. There are several amazing bariatric surgeons in New York City who could treat him just as expertly as Dr. Now.  

[88Keys]

14 hours ago, Jeeves said:

 

I also agree with @AnnaBaptist, Robert was a guy with strengths and weaknesses. He was articulate, and though I can't recall an example on the episode, he struck me as someone with a sense of humor. I'm sorry his body wore out under the strain and his journey here was cut short. RIP, guy. 

Is it weird that I think his voice-overs were some of the best ever?  He really was very well-spoken.  Or maybe it just seems that way because we're coming off of Lisa's slow speech and complete insincerity from last week.

 

9 hours ago, skippy said:

I'm amazed that so many posters are saying that they are surprised because "he was doing so well" and "he was doing such a great job" and "he was really trying".  None of that is accurate, at least by what we saw last night.  He wasn't making any eating choices for himself.  He wasn't choosing to stop drugs or even to cut down on drugs.  He really wasn't choosing to walk, even during his first stay at rehab...he walked because they made him.  During his second stay at rehab he refused to walk at all.    He was not succeeding because he refused to participate in his own healing.  He refused to take any responsibility at all.  My heart goes out to Kathryn and to his mom, but Robert had a tremendous opportunity and he chose not to take it.

 

I don't think he really wanted to get better.  Or he didn't want to put in the work to get better.  He kept saying "I'm doing this for her."  He should have been doing it himself.

Food and painkillers were the things that made him happy.  Once he lost those, he gave up.  

 

3 hours ago, calpurnia99 said:

I also noticed when the EMTS where taking him off the floor and out to the car, he apologized to them twice. He kept saying "I am so sorry you have to do this guys". Very unlike AH MAH LAHG!! or "I"m Cleopatra"

That makes me like him even more, honestly.  It makes me so mad when these huge patients don't even say "thank you" to the EMT's who are literally risking their own health to transport them.

2 hours ago, dbell1 said:

He had to get off certain pain medications in order to be considered for the show. Was there a drug addict in the past on this show? I'd never watched before last night. And I cried a bit and felt a lot of things, anger, sadness, disappointment, and just total heartbeat watching what they went through. 

 

There has probably been more than one drug addict.  But recently there was the lovely Steven Assanti, who makes Rob look like Prince Charming.  

[Singingflutist]

10 hours ago, MissCurmudgeonly said:

Maybe look at it as, there are MILLIONS of people who do take painkillers and don't have problems? Not to negate those who do, but that might make you feel less worried. I for one have taken many painkillers over the years (cancer surgeries, etc.), everything from dilaudid to oxy, and I take what i need for serious pain and that's it. I actually have lots of leftover pill bottles around the house that I keep coming across. 

Me too. I have been on them numerous times note: I have severe chronic pain. I have Crohn's and have had my large intestine and rectum removed (open total proctocolectomy) so I have an ileostomy. I had to go off all my Crohn's meds pre op (they are immunosuppressants) and surgery was huge- 33 staples in my abdomen and 29 perianal staples plus dissolvable stitches in perianal area as I had fistulas and they were repaired at the same way plus stitches around my stoma. Parr of my incision opened and was packed for several months and now is hypergranulated (still and my surgery was in may). I was on dilaudid and codeine on and off pre and post op. I couldn't go back on meds post op and it didn't heal fast enough. In October my Crohn's moved to my stomach and duodenum and I developed severe idiopathic Gastroparesis at the same time which causes excrutiating upper abdominal pain and non stop nausea and vomiting. 

 

 

Anyways back to the point.  I was hospitalized for 62 days (25 days in 1.5 weeks home 37 days in) and all the days I was in the hospital except the very end I was on 2mg sub q (needle) dilaudid (started every 4 hours and weened to every 7 hours with toradol as a breakthrough in the middle). In the 1.5 weeks i was home i was on dilaudid pills. I was physically dependent ( not addicted) on dilaudid. Luckily I had a consult with the chronic pain management dr who put me on 2 non narcotic pain killers (pregabalin and mirtazipine) and 2 weeks of sustained release dilaudid to ween off the dilaudid but OMG I was off sub q dilaudid the last 2 days of my hospitalization and withdrawl was hell. I can't even explain how bad I felt. It made me never want to take it again other than post op or hospitalizations BUT since it was adependency not addiction I don't crave it at all. I have bottles of it and codeine and tramadol that I don't touch unless the pain is an 8-9. I never had withdrawl from the pills and poat op. This was the only time I experienced withdrawl but that was because I was on injections for an extended period of time (I was also on sub q gravol and I had no spots left in my upper arms for injections so I ended up having a butterfly if that lets you know how much/long I was on it). 

 

I think dependency is a bigger concern than addiction as a lot of Drs are not familiar with all the non opioid pain killer options so they just prescribe narcotics and keep iving more and more to chronic pain patients. More access to pain management drs and education is needed.

Edited March 2, 2018 by Singingflutist

[auntjess]

2 hours ago, cynicat said:

I'm also a little suspicious that there was a lot more wrong with Robert that showed up in his tests, and that's why Dr. Now wanted him to lose that much more weight prior to a weight loss surgery than his usual candidates, and was  vehement that he be mobile.

Since his father and a brother both died of heart attack, is sounds as if he may have had a congenital heart problem.

[babyhouseman]

People magazine had an article about Robert. Someone set up a GoFundMe account for medical expenses, moving expenses and funeral expenses. So I assume TLC doesn't pay for anything. 

 

http://people.com/health/842-lb-man-dies-heart-attack-weight-loss-surgery-my-600-lb-life/?utm_campaign=peoplemagazine&utm_source=twitter.com&utm_medium=social&xid=socialflow_twitter_peoplemag

[Singingflutist]

Oh he definitely wasn't cut off cold turkey. You can't hide acute withdrawl symptoms. It causes convulsions. No Dr with half a brain cuts anyone off cold turkey unless you are on a very low dose.

 

The talk about pain and depression: atypical and tricyclic antidepressants are often used as pain medication in pain management.

 

My med list is longer than his I'm on 7 prescription meds (6 are pills and 1 is an autoinject pen biologic) and 4 OTC meds plus supplements... and I'm low normal weight and 42.Gotta love chronic illness and pain.

[missnoa]

20 minutes ago, babyhouseman said:

People magazine had an article about Robert. Someone set up a GoFundMe account for medical expenses, moving expenses and funeral expenses. So I assume TLC doesn't pay for anything. 

 

http://people.com/health/842-lb-man-dies-heart-attack-weight-loss-surgery-my-600-lb-life/?utm_campaign=peoplemagazine&utm_source=twitter.com&utm_medium=social&xid=socialflow_twitter_peoplemag

We've seen a couple of people crowdfund before to try and get down to Houston, so they must not. I always found that confusing because you'd think that paying to move them isn't a big cost and if they never get there, there's no show.

[Awfarmington]

14 hours ago, Giant Misfit said:

There was, but it was prior to the 600-lb series. It was a guy, I want to say Billy, maybe? He had a special right after Half-ton Man (who has since died as well). They showed his funeral during the show. All I can remember about his was that he was also a bed chef, like Penny and the Juggalo girl. 

As for Robert, I am still astounded that it appeared he had no medical intervention while in the nursing home and that it appeared everything was poo-poo'd like, "oh, he's just struggling because he's fat" or "his body is giving out." EKG? Angiogram? Echocardiogram? I mean, he should have been tested at some point. 

Was Dr Now Billy’s doctor on that special? 

[Tabbygirl521]

1 hour ago, auntjess said:

Since his father and a brother both died of heart attack, is sounds as if he may have had a congenital heart problem.

While I feel very sorry for his mom, I can’t get over the fact that she overfed him to 852 lbs, especially in light of his family history. 

I wonder if Kathryn was much of an enabler. From the little we saw of their life in NJ, I got the feeling that Mom overrode everyone and indulged Robert, while Kathryn performed the physical care and was too worn out to push back on Mom. I know we heard Mom say that kathryn normally did the shopping but I wonder. Why did Mom show up that one particular day to buy two loaves of bread and No Vegetables, har har har!

Moot points. This was very sad. I was so encouraged to see Robert make such great initial progress. Tragic. 

[ChicksDigScars]

TLC’s Facebook page has a condolence post and thanks Robert and his family for allowing them to continue to film, afterwards, to complete his story and inform viewers. A woman claiming to be a Robert’s sister, posted in the comments that it was all a lie, and that’s he was never bed ridden for nine months, that he was in Houston, under Dr Now’s care for only two months. Clearly, she has an axe to grind, or wants to blame Dr. Now. Her account doesn’t add up. He lost a huge amount of weight and there’s no way all of it dropped off in two months. I’m sorry for her loss, but I call bullshit. 

[PradaKitty]

I pretty much knew the outcome would be bad the minute I heard the naration was not done by Robert. Then, when it was mentioned that his father and brother both had heart attacks, I just assumed the writing was on the wall. Even if he hadn’t been supermobidly obese, he may have had a heart attack anyway, just based on family history. 

I appreciated Dr. Now’s shout out to those in the medical profession who, by their neglect or lack of concern, allow people to get to this state.

[gardendiva]

1 hour ago, ChicksDigScars said:

TLC’s Facebook page has a condolence post and thanks Robert and his family for allowing them to continue to film, afterwards, to complete his story and inform viewers. A woman claiming to be a Robert’s sister, posted in the comments that it was all a lie, and that’s he was never bed ridden for nine months, that he was in Houston, under Dr Now’s care for only two months. Clearly, she has an axe to grind, or wants to blame Dr. Now. Her account doesn’t add up. He lost a huge amount of weight and there’s no way all of it dropped off in two months. I’m sorry for her loss, but I call bullshit. 

Someone copied and pasted a similar but much longer comment and put it in a My 600 Lb. Life Facebook group too, but the apparent author of the post I saw claimed to be Robert’s nephew’s wife. And commenters in that thread said they saw the same post in the comments on a People Magazine page covering the story. That comment or something similar is making the rounds..

Edited March 2, 2018 by gardendiva
Added words for clarity

[Bugbite]

Something in the timeline doesn't add up.  For example,  the lymphodemia surgery was on Dr. Now's birthday (October 11th per online search).  There was a Happy Birthday message to him on the whiteboard in the OR.   Robert died in November.   This doesn't match time spent for months clearly discussed for time spent in the hospital,  rehab and finally long-term care facility. 

Also, someone please correct me if I am wrong, but didn't the calendar on the wall for the dinner scene when Robert eats with the family clearly say : September 2017.  

I am sorry for their loss but something seems out of order.

[Snarkasm]

11 hours ago, steff13 said:

Me too!  The guy who played Daphne's fiancé Donny on Frasier, right?

He reminded me of Lou Costello.

[Snarkasm]

2 hours ago, Awfarmington said:

Was Dr Now Billy’s doctor on that special? 

You might be thinking of Billy Robbins.  Dr. Now was/is his doctor. 

 

[Corvino]

This episode satisfied me in the middle (just watched the Supersized one tonight on the 11 p.m. repeat, not knowing from any previous viewings how it ended) by answering a question I've had for a long time. I have looked at these horrors of giant lymphedemas people had on this and other shows, and heard Dr. Now and others talking about weight loss and compression and such, and I was screaming "JUST CUT IT OFF!" Especially on people's legs. When I looked on line to see if excising them was possible, everybody was still talking about weight loss and compression. So I greeted the fact that they could get rid of Robert's awful stomach bags surgically with joy. I was so looking forward to his getting the other one removed too, and to seeing how he would look when he stood up without them. Then, shock and sadness, and frustration of that desire besides everything else.

So... lymphedema excision surgery is very intricate and difficult, tying off thousands of little blood vessels, and dangerous? It's unlucky that when they performed it for once on the show, it was on someone with a weak heart rather than all those robust people with beach balls on their legs. I would certainly want to risk it if I ever developed such a thing.

I liked him from the start, and was surprised when I read the Live Chat (this is a pleasant thing to do, watch the show and then relive it by seeing how everybody reacted to it as it happened) to read that so many disliked him at first. I must have carried over very low expectations from that terrible woman last week, but I thought "Well, at least he's letting people help him stand up and he's moving a few steps. He's trying." Yes, a low bar. But with Kathryn's help and lack of subversion of his diet, he was doing so well at weight loss without getting within shouting distance of actual bariatric surgery. Such a shame.

Yes, tears for the first time for this show. And the death brought out so much pain and sorrow from people on this forum! My sorrow and condolences to Robert's loved ones and to the victims of pain and outrage who have shared it here.

[Snarkastikate]

10 hours ago, JJ1 said:

I still don’t understand why Robert went to Houston for treatment. There are several amazing bariatric surgeons in New York City who could treat him just as expertly as Dr. Now.  

Yes there are many surgeons here, but none would operate on a patient this size.  My late husband had a gastric bypass here in NY.  And I have to think that very few if any would be willing to put in the very long term effort and have the elaborate program Dr Now seems to have.  And there's a whole lot more to working with people this size they aren't showing on the tv.  Even what looks to be the most hopeless cases often are successful, to my amazement.   

[Awfarmington]

7 hours ago, Snarkasm said:

You might be thinking of Billy Robbins.  Dr. Now was/is his doctor. 

 

Thank you! That’s the one I was thinking of. 

[lightninggirl]

I know everyone's weight affects them differently, but I was so impressed with Robert's mobility for his size. He was 850 pounds and able to sit up, stand up, and walk. Some of these 400- and 500-lb people refuse to stand up, period - much less walk. I was SO gunning for him to succeed; this episode definitely brought on the tears.

[88Keys]

7 hours ago, Corvino said:

 

I liked him from the start, and was surprised when I read the Live Chat (this is a pleasant thing to do, watch the show and then relive it by seeing how everybody reacted to it as it happened) to read that so many disliked him at first. I must have carried over very low expectations from that terrible woman last week,

Lisa has changed this show forever by dropping the bar to the absolute lowest level possible.  It's basically on the ground now.  

[QuinnInND]

14 minutes ago, 88Keys said:

Lisa has changed this show forever by dropping the bar to the absolute lowest level possible.  It's basically on the ground now.  

It's below that. Somewhere near the center of the earth. 

12 hours ago, Singingflutist said:

Me too. I have been on them numerous times note: I have severe chronic pain. I have Crohn's and have had my large intestine and rectum removed (open total proctocolectomy) so I have an ileostomy. I had to go off all my Crohn's meds pre op (they are immunosuppressants) and surgery was huge- 33 staples in my abdomen and 29 perianal staples plus dissolvable stitches in perianal area as I had fistulas and they were repaired at the same way plus stitches around my stoma. Parr of my incision opened and was packed for several months and now is hypergranulated (still and my surgery was in may). I was on dilaudid and codeine on and off pre and post op. I couldn't go back on meds post op and it didn't heal fast enough. In October my Crohn's moved to my stomach and duodenum and I developed severe idiopathic Gastroparesis at the same time which causes excrutiating upper abdominal pain and non stop nausea and vomiting. 

 

 

Anyways back to the point.  I was hospitalized for 62 days (25 days in 1.5 weeks home 37 days in) and all the days I was in the hospital except the very end I was on 2mg sub q (needle) dilaudid (started every 4 hours and weened to every 7 hours with toradol as a breakthrough in the middle). In the 1.5 weeks i was home i was on dilaudid pills. I was physically dependent ( not addicted) on dilaudid. Luckily I had a consult with the chronic pain management dr who put me on 2 non narcotic pain killers (pregabalin and mirtazipine) and 2 weeks of sustained release dilaudid to ween off the dilaudid but OMG I was off sub q dilaudid the last 2 days of my hospitalization and withdrawl was hell. I can't even explain how bad I felt. It made me never want to take it again other than post op or hospitalizations BUT since it was adependency not addiction I don't crave it at all. I have bottles of it and codeine and tramadol that I don't touch unless the pain is an 8-9. I never had withdrawl from the pills and poat op. This was the only time I experienced withdrawl but that was because I was on injections for an extended period of time (I was also on sub q gravol and I had no spots left in my upper arms for injections so I ended up having a butterfly if that lets you know how much/long I was on it). 

 

I think dependency is a bigger concern than addiction as a lot of Drs are not familiar with all the non opioid pain killer options so they just prescribe narcotics and keep iving more and more to chronic pain patients. More access to pain management drs and education is needed.

OMG! I can't imagine what you've gone through! Hope you start getting better soon!! 

[alegtostandon]

23 hours ago, MissCurmudgeonly said:

Maybe look at it as, there are MILLIONS of people who do take painkillers and don't have problems? Not to negate those who do, but that might make you feel less worried. I for one have taken many painkillers over the years (cancer surgeries, etc.), everything from dilaudid to oxy, and I take what i need for serious pain and that's it. I actually have lots of leftover pill bottles around the house that I keep coming across. 

Thank you, MissCurmudgeonly...this is a huge topic right now.  I have a nerve disease and have a pain infusion pump implanted with dilaudid...my husband is in oxycodone for a severe back issue.  Our Dr's have told us that the issue is due to people not following proper instructions, they also have to watch for those who keep asking for refills, run out before the date, etc.  

Re: Robert, first, to his family and loved ones, I am so very sorry. 

Things that really caught my attention...

Dr Now said Robert pulled his stitches out in order to get more pain meds. Also, Robert seemed to perk up when asking if he'd have the second surgery the following week. 

The fact that Robert was never sent home tells me that Dr Now knew there were other issues & he was concerned. He sent that idiot Assante or whatever his name was, home with an addiction issue. Others who have refused to get up were still sent home. So, there was something with Robert that was concerning to Dr Now.  Robert never complained, that I saw, of any other discomfort besides the surgical area & the folds of skin.

Edited March 2, 2018 by alegtostandon

[calpurnia99]

10 hours ago, Bugbite said:

Something in the timeline doesn't add up.  For example,  the lymphodemia surgery was on Dr. Now's birthday (October 11th per online search).  There was a Happy Birthday message to him on the whiteboard in the OR.   Robert died in November.   This doesn't match time spent for months clearly discussed for time spent in the hospital,  rehab and finally long-term care facility. 

Also, someone please correct me if I am wrong, but didn't the calendar on the wall for the dinner scene when Robert eats with the family clearly say : September 2017.  

I am sorry for their loss but something seems out of order.

I am so excited me and Dr. Now share the same birthday! October 11th!

I was thinking it is a good thing that he didn't die right after the lymphodema surgery because that would look bad. Also Dr. Now said many times during the episode that Robert's body was in terrible shape from the drugs as well as from being too fat. I don't think it was added in after. He kept saying he was close to death.

On another note, I am finding doctors are NOT prescribing painkillers easily at all these days. They are all paranoid and are being watched. I've been on the same dose of tramadol for 19 years now and get labs twice a year and everything is normal, yet my last visit the rhuematologist went into this whole "If I write it for this amount, I will get investigated! There is going to be an inquiry made! This is the last time, I hope there is not an inquiry to this" and on and on and on. This is the same doctor who started me on a much higher dose in 1998.  I also hear this from a good friend of mine who has terminal cancer- they make her jump through hoops to get her pain meds.

Edited March 2, 2018 by calpurnia99

[JJ1]

24 minutes ago, alegtostandon said:

The fact that Robert was never sent home tells me that Dr Now knew there were other issues & he was concerned. He sent that idiot Assante or whatever his name was, home with an addiction issue. Others who have refused to get up were still sent home. So, there was something with Robert that was concerning to Dr Now.  Robert never complained, that I saw, of any other discomfort besides the surgical area & the folds of skin.

Yes, something seemed strange about the whole timeline. I can’t remember - did the show ever show Robert in an apartment in Houston? It seems like he was admitted to the hospital to get some quick weight loss and then moved directly into rehab. From rehab to surgery. Then directly over to long-term care.  In the past, people were sent home while they continued the diet and pursued physical therapy.   I think the medical team was fully aware that he had significant health issues in addition to the weight.  I’m sure privacy laws restrict how much information can be shared, but I wish we knew more about why certain decisions were made. 

[Swiss]

  I thought it was odd when Dr. Now stated he wouldn't do Robert's gastric bypass even though he has lost all that weight.  Dr. Now said that Robert's body couldn't handle such an invasive procedure.  Yet he went ahead and did his lymphodema surgery.  To me, that was an extremely invasive procedure. He may have been under anesthesia far longer then for the gastric surgery.  One would think that recovery would be more difficult for it then the gastric surgery. Cutting a 40lb mass off a body and the hundreds of stitches required to close it seems pretty invasive to me.  That bugged me the first time I watched the show and again last night. 

Edited March 2, 2018 by Swiss

[leighroda]

@dbell1 this was posted on Reddit about Robert, do you know if there is any truth to it? I don’t think there is I think someone just wants 15 minutes of fame 

[ThisGirlAsh]

Now, thankfully I've never had to go to a morgue and identify the body of a loved one, but "Bag covered in blood"?  Is there even a thing? Especially because he died from something medical and not a gunshot wound.  That just seems like a really weird statement to me.  

[LeeAnn]

35 minutes ago, leighroda said:

@dbell1 this was posted on Reddit about Robert, do you know if there is any truth to it? I don’t think there is I think someone just wants 15 minutes of fame 

I don't know about this.  They wouldn't accept him if he was over 700 pounds?  Come on now.    No way did he only weigh in the 600's in the beginning.  No way.  You could definitely see the drop in weight when they had him up walking.   They took his mother to the morgue?  Come on now.  Covered in blood?  What?  Do you even know what an embolism is?  I call BS. 

Robert died because of Robert.  

[chickenella]

I am questioning the timeline on his story, he was only there from September till his his death in November =3 months, not 9.

Also, while he was in the hospital and/or rehab he is shown on some type of apparatus on his knee a couple of times which was not addressed.

Edited March 2, 2018 by chickenella
Added another thought to the post

[gardendiva]

That Reddit post is the same one I saw posted in a FB group, and it seemed so dramatic and inflammatory that I immediately was suspicious of it. However, people here had observed that there was a calendar showing September 2017 on the wall in Robert’s NJ home, so he was still home as of some time in Sept. which fits in the timeline that the “wife of Robert’s nephew” claims in that post above.

[leighroda]

11 minutes ago, LeeAnn said:

I don't know about this.  They wouldn't accept him if he was over 700 pounds?  Come on now.    No way did he only weigh in the 600's in the beginning.  No way.  You could definitely see the drop in weight when they had him up walking.   They took his mother to the morgue?  Come on now.  Covered in blood?  What?  Do you even know what an embolism is?  I call BS. 

Robert died because of Robert.  

1) my real name is leigh Ann ☺️

2) back on topic, I don’t buy the story there are so many things wrong with it, they don’t take family members to the morgue anymore in most states/facilities, an embolism would indicate internal bleeding... so unless there was some kind of freak accident it wouldn’t be “all over the body bag” and once you die you no longer have blood pressure, meaning blood is not circulating, so if you were to bleed (which is highly unlikely because there is no pressure building to cause a bleed) it would just seep out, and gravity would pool it down. I can’t even get started on the whole stitches scenario, if there was any truth to that the family would own that facility because that would be gross neglect. 

So im just curious if dbell1 had heard any of this or knew if this person is even related at all.

[CoachWristletJen]

26 minutes ago, LeeAnn said:

I don't know about this.  They wouldn't accept him if he was over 700 pounds?  Come on now.    No way did he only weigh in the 600's in the beginning.  No way.  You could definitely see the drop in weight when they had him up walking.   They took his mother to the morgue?  Come on now.  Covered in blood?  What?  Do you even know what an embolism is?  I call BS. 

Robert died because of Robert.  

I agree with you. I think the woman who wrote this was a well-intentioned, deceived member of Robert's family. For starters, he looked well over 700 pounds and closer to 900 pounds. And the show does accept larger people. (I'm thinking of the young man with the Munchausen mom for starters.) Dr. Now told Robert he had to start moving or he would get a blood clot or embolism, but Robert just would not move. Some of them are like that. They just take to their beds and will not leave them for anyone or anything. The niece-in-law is getting Robert's distorted view of events that have probably been filtered again through his grieving mother.  There's other things she said, too, that just don't really fact check. This relative's heart is in the right place. She's just been fed the wrong information.

[KateHearts]

18 hours ago, skippy said:

One brother died.

I'm referring to the living brother. He is not mentioned at all.

14 hours ago, ChicksDigScars said:

TLC’s Facebook page has a condolence post and thanks Robert and his family for allowing them to continue to film, afterwards, to complete his story and inform viewers. A woman claiming to be a Robert’s sister, posted in the comments that it was all a lie, and that’s he was never bed ridden for nine months, that he was in Houston, under Dr Now’s care for only two months. Clearly, she has an axe to grind, or wants to blame Dr. Now. Her account doesn’t add up. He lost a huge amount of weight and there’s no way all of it dropped off in two months. I’m sorry for her loss, but I call bullshit. 

There was never a mention of a sister in the intro story- mother stated there were 3 boys. I found it weird that a sister popped up after he died.

[KateHearts]

I think we've been subjected to a lot of heavy editing- out of respect for the dead, it seems that TLC patched the show together to present him in a decent light (i.e., very little stuffing his face, not much about his diet or adherence to it once in the hospital, etc). For that reason, I think we aren't getting the picture as to what Dr. Now's concerns were - but a few of his comments imply that he was very concerned about Robert's state of health.  The whole "pain pills ruined his stomach" thing seemed confusing to me (I am a medical provider and that's not an automatic assumption regarding someone on narcotics), and I would imagine that anyone entering the program would have cardiac testing done, so maybe the gravity of his cardiac status wasn't really revealed. But given the family history (brother and dad dying from cardiac issues) and his obesity, I would imagine that his heart was probably pretty badly compromised.  Why they didn't expand on this is a mystery- unless maybe there would be legal risk in revealing that his poor health was known and yet they proceeded with *extremely* aggressive weight loss (risky for anyone and increases cardiac risk), as well as a surgery that Dr. Now himself described as risky, bloody and likely to go badly at any moment.  The concern and tears before he went into the OR makes me think that there was more risk than viewers were told about.

[LadyArcadia]

This seems to validate the two month theory.  This was what Kathryn posted a few days after he died (copied from one of the article links above).  Bolded for emphasis.

"I don’t know how to start what is going to be the most painful facebook post I will ever write. I know this is late and I would like to apologize to everyone that I haven’t been able to reach out to all of you before it was released to facebook. On Wednesday, November 15, 2017, the love of my life, my best friend, my closest confidant, Robert Buchel passed away suddenly. I wish I could say that my heart was broken or even shattered, but in reality it is just gone. My heart died along with him. Our future together died along with him. Next year we were going to be getting married in Walt Disney World and have our own Disney Fairytale Wedding. We were going to start a family. We were going to grow old together. Everything we were ever going to be can now never be. He did not deserve to go this way and this was not his time. 14 years together is not enough and although many people say it’s better to love the time you have than to mourn the time you don’t: no offense but screw you. Rob had a hard life and in the last 2 months he finally had hope for the life he always wanted. This was a robbery beyond words. And thanks to those of you who have reached out to me, I realize now that this robbery is more dispicable than I thought. The memories and the love that I have been seeing for him has been overwhelming. I am overjoyed at how much love he had given but also received from all of you. I am also angered beyond words that he’s not here to continue to love and be loved. And even moreseo I am saddened that he died not realizing how much love you all really had for him. Rob suffered from never realizing how good a man he was and always felt inadequate and a failure. Thank you to all of you for validating my love for him. I knew what kind of soul he had but could never convince him of how truly special he was. A person like him should never have to die this way and certainly not this young and most definitely not when his life was about to begin. Arrangements have not been made yet, but his mother and I will be settling things here in Texas as we wait for his remains. Once we have him back, we will bring him home and I promise you that I will notify you when his memorial is scheduled. You all meant so much to him and I thank you all for being there. Please keep his mom and family and friends in your thoughts. This has been difficult for all of us. But most of all, please do this for me: take lessons from him. Every morning he would tell me or text me “good morning angel”. Every phone call ended with “I love you.” Every night he would text me or tell me “Goodnight my love.” In fact the night before he passed he told me “If I don’t wake up tomorrow please know that I have always loved you.” Tell that person you love that you love them. The only consolation I have right now is that we were together and that his last words of peace to me were how he felt about me and how I felt about him. And when he did pass, he was not alone. I was there holding his hand. Thank you to the doctors and nurses who worked tirelessly for almost three hours to bring him back to me. Although I do not know your names, please understand your efforts will not be forgotten. I still have his phone on and his facebook is still live. I will see your messages to him and I will try to respond, You can also contact me directly as well. Thank you all for loving him."

[Emkat]

This episode was weird. He lost over 300 pounds but he didn't look that different.  Also I think he was in pain for real and it should have been managed better. I understand they don't tell us everything that's going on and this one was super extra heavily edited.

[AZChristian]

I can't imagine that TLC would air one minute of Robert's story if such gross malpractice had been involved in his care.  I'm thinking the "niece-in-law" either got bad info, or is a drama queen.  And, no, there would be no reason for a body bag to be covered in blood from an embolism.  An embolism is a blockage of a blood vessel.  She also says that Robert's mother didn't know until she got there that Robert had died.  Didn't the show have a scene where Kathryn called the mother before she arrived?

It will be interesting to see whether Kathryn or Robert's mother file any lawsuits or come up with the same issues that niece-in-law raises. 

[Teddybear]

I just have to say, whenever I see a post with Aww mah laygz! and whichever hilarious spelling is chosen, I laugh EVERY. TIME.  That will never not be funny.  Keep it coming!

Even towards the end of the episode when Robert wouldn't get out of bed, Dr Now kept warning him his body was going to give out.  He predicted it, even when Robert had made a lot of progress.  I know we've discussed a participant or two of the show who have passed, but I wonder if Dr Now deals with death on a regular basis with his patients. 

Fun fact I never knew: I didn't know his son was a producer of the show.  

Edited March 2, 2018 by Teddybear
wanted to add about show

[Emkat]

I just noticed something: when he was doing PT at the last rehab place he has a wound vac. Which tells us his incision was opened up and not healing.

[magemaud]

I was also confused by the travel time to Houston from the episode. The first night they pulled into a motel in “Harrisburg.” The city in PA is only about three hours from Forked River so I figured they meant the Harrisburg in VIRGINIA. The next night, based on the EMTs’ shirts, they stayed in the Roanoke VA area which appears to be only two hours from Harrisburg, VA (or 4 1/2 hours from H’burg PA which also doesn’t make sense because why would they travel due West instead of a diagonal route?) Then, the very next day, they appeared to arrive in Houston which is at least a 17 hour journey. Unless they edited out at least one other overnight stop along the way, it doesn’t add up to me. I’m also joining the posters who suspect some creative timeline editing. 

Edited March 2, 2018 by magemaud

[Azubah]

1 hour ago, KateHearts said:

There was never a mention of a sister in the intro story- mother stated there were 3 boys. I found it weird that a sister popped up after he died.

No, the sister was there from the beginning. She was shown in the early family pictures, and then when Robert's brother died, Robert said that his sister told him "I always thought it would be you to go first", or something along those lines.

3 hours ago, Swiss said:

Cutting a 40lb mass off a body and the hundreds of stitches required to close it seems pretty invasive to me. 

Agree completely! The bypass would have been laparoscopic, too, whereas just whacking a big chunk of flesh off the abdomen is brute force, so to speak.

[Granny58]

@ava111  Wow, so sorry to hear about all you went through.  That sucks.  But, Robert was on Prozac already.  

[Granny58]

On 3/1/2018 at 9:59 AM, KateHearts said:

I am a medical provider, and I've noticed that many people seem to know when their deaths are imminent. 

that's interesting.  is it different than when people are panicking and freaked out, thinking they will die?  Are people who are actually going to die behaving differently?

On 3/1/2018 at 12:06 PM, Thrifty said:

I hear so many horror stories about people getting hooked on pain killers, that I'm afraid of them now.  I have to go for a few minor dental surgeries later this year to fix some missing teeth.  Bone graft, followed by implants.  I hope the pain isn't too bad and I can get by okay without them.

Not everybody becomes addicted quickly.  I've had opioids for tonsillectomy and also some dental work....took a few and that was it.