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S05.E09: One K at a Time


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It's those darned blisters! I mean, PCOS! I mean, Plantar Fasciitis! I mean.... I don't know but it's not her fault! She's fabulous I tell you!!! Fabulous!!!! They should make races appropriate to people of her ability. Like a 0.1K! Or an 8 foot fun run! Fat Shamers!!! Fat Shamers!!!!   /sarcasm. 

It was totally the shoes.

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30 minutes ago, ClareWalks said:

I have developed massive blisters, had them pop, and developed a second layer of blisters in the same spot. Several times, in several marathons. Anyone who complains about blisters, I'm like HOLD MY FUCKIN' BEER. Blisters should literally be the least of her concerns. Her Achilles could snap!*

 

*No.

Damn, woman!!!! Now MY feet hurt in solidarity for yours!! I don't want to stand up even.  I've had blisters but never anything like that. Mine were more of the walking around town all day in new ballet flats with no sox. "Around town" being a small town in the S of France where I was in school and the sidewalks were paving stones or cobbles. They weren't fun but they didn't leave me at the end of the day leaning on two guys and barely able to stand up. If her shoes had been brand new, I could see developing blisters DURING the "race" but she starts off with blisters. From what?? I don't understand??? I've never heard of anyone getting blisters on their arches from going barefoot and sitting around, plopped on the couch, lolling in a swimming pool or driving in a car. Have I missed something? Did she ACTUALLY (kind of) train (I use the term Lightly) for this? Is that where they came from?? I'm confused. 

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40 minutes ago, 3girlsforus said:
42 minutes ago, ClareWalks said:

I am at a hotel that doesn't have TLC so I'm reading y'all's comments and this one cracked me up. You are all producing fantastic snark tonight!

I hope you get to see this one because I can’t wait to hear what you have to say. It’s truly unbelievable 

Yes, Clarewalks we absolutely NEED you to see this and hear your comments!

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43 minutes ago, ClareWalks said:

I am DVRing it don't worry! LOL I am dying just reading about it!

You will LOVE the part where they show everyone taking down the tent, the race timer, and the whole finish line she-bang before Twit ever even gets NEAR the finish line area! Just some barnacles, cheering and putting a lei and a medal around her neck, which she immediately, petulantly rips off.

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1 hour ago, aliya said:

I audit human subjects research and see studies about a myriad of diseases/conditions. Today I saw a study that will test a drug usually used for breast cancer to see if it will help PCOS (there's scientific merit behind this). It just made me think of Twit and how, if her PCOS really worried her, she'd be seeing a specialist at a major research hospital. I'm sure Babs and Glenn would pay the extra expense of a specialist if it meant that Twit could lose some weight and get her PCOS in order.  But that would be like being an adult and taking care of yourself; not Twit strong suits. 

And she's within an hours drive to three world renowned research hospitals

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Y'all have to be kinder to poor Heather - the agony of Buddy dumping her is her only storyline this season.  If she doesn't wail and moan about Buddy, she'll be demoted to being the one to rub crème on Twit's thighs for her chub rub.  Or worse - not be shown at all and lose all that TLC money she's earning, moaning about her loss of her man.  LOL

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@Maggienolia good question! Who knows. Probably the sheer weight of her body causes blisters. And the goddamn flip-flops LOL. Yeah my worst ever blisters were after a half marathon. I had two blisters on each foot that were each 2-3 full inches in diameter, one filled with blood. The worst part was, I was signed up for Goofys Challenge at Disney World, so I was supposed to do a full marathon the following day. I made the hard decision to skip the second race because I knew I couldn't keep pace for the cutoffs by limping. See, Whitney, THOSE are Race Day Problems.

Edited by ClareWalks
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he'll be demoted to being the one to rub crème on Twit's thighs for her chub rub. 

Todd earned every penny of whatever he has ever made on this show tonight. Cash out now, bro.

I'm glad Buddy is sober and looking well but he was just pissing me off at the end. He does 30 days in rehab and suddenly he possesses the wisdom of the ages? Whitney may have addiction issues but pulling out some sort of success-by-hero crawl across the finish line isn't symptomatic of them. She wailed and moaned and gnashed her teeth but she did work through the pain. an addict would have left the race and used his substance of choice to numb the pain. I can't wait for Buddy to just go work on Buddy without philosophizing about how everyone around him is an addict and he can show them the way, the truth and the light from his vantage point of 35 days sober.

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Ok, you all have convinced me.

This show is more about how to enable a clueless individual than it is about someone who is making lemonade out of lemons.  There is no way she is enjoying a fabulous life unless one is proud of being coddled at an age where one should be entirely responsible for oneself.  I disagree with Dad not telling her of the difference in the race until they actually got to Hawaii.  The training was way insufficient for the effort required.  Nevertheless, if one is in that much pain, stop already.  Don’t ruin everyone else’s experience unless your sole mission is to make it all about you.  And at that point, when your support team abandons you, watch this back to see why they have.

Edited by b2H
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2 minutes ago, ClareWalks said:

@Maggienolia good question! Who knows. Probably the sheer weight of her body causes blisters. And the goddamn flip-flops LOL. Yeah my worst ever blisters were after a half marathon. I had two blisters on each foot that were each 2 full inches in diameter, one filled with blood. The worst part was, I was signed up for Goofys Challenge at Disney World, so I was supposed to do a full marathon the following day. I made the hard decision to skip the second race because I knew I couldn't keep pace for the cutoffs by limping. See, Whitney, THOSE are Race Day Problems.

Oh that sucks!!  Thankfully, I’ve never really had a problem with blisters while training, or any chafing for that matter.  I did have an issue with my water belt Fanny pack ( I call it my dork belt) bouncing on my hip bones.

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1 minute ago, Elizzikra said:

I can't wait for Buddy to just go work on Buddy without philosophizing about how everyone around him is an addict and he can show them the way, the truth and the light from his vantage point of 35 days sober.

This is typical of the newly-reformed addict.  I can cut him a lot of slack.

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disagree with Dad not telling her of the difference in the race until they actually got to Hawaii.  The training was way insufficient for the effort required.  Nevertheless, if one is in that much pain, stop already.

I didn't think that Glenn should have lied but I also thought Whitney was wrong to back out altogether. She could have just done the first 5K and called it a day. Promise kept.

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Maybe we just need a massive Intervention/My 600 Pound Life/My Big Fat Fabulous Life/My Strange Addiction mashup show???

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I think it was telling when Buddy said his relationship with Heather was ALWAYS rocky. He is not that in to you Heather. The way she paints it they are soulmates, I think the reality was very different.

I think that Heather thinks their relationship went south because of his addiction - so now that his addiction is being "fixed," they can be together.

I think that Buddy thinks the relationship was rocky separate and independent of his addiction and he is smart to recognize that he needs to stay away from Heather and avoid any romantic relationship for a long time. And he's probably sick of Whitney bringing it up because a) none of her business and b) his very serious addiction should be a bigger concern for Whitney than Heather's wee broken heart.

Edited by Elizzikra
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Okay, I just watched the Lisa episode of My 600 Lb Life, so, I’m watching back-to-back dumpster fires. 

 

Of course she wants to smell the dolphin’s breath.  Just a meh overall to the dolphin segment. 

 

Seriously, if you can’t apply your own goddamn chub rub and blister mitigation material, you should really rethink your life.

 

did feel for her a little bit when having a bad time doing the 8K.  I’m fat, too, and working on it. I’ve done 5Ks and a 10K.  I had a really bad time doing my first half-marathon last spring. The first 7 miles were fine, but the second half of the distance was when stuff went really bad.  I had spasms start in my toes and go up both calves.  The last quarter of the distance, running was a complete impossibility.  Even when walking, there were several times where I had to stop to deal with my toes being stuck curled under or having a stuck cramp in one calf. I was damned lucky I didn’t get pulled off the course.  Truth be told, I could have trained better for this, but I didn’t finish last.  There was no victory in that, though. It was more like, “Congratulations on a job...uh...done.”

 

And yeah, other runners/participants are generally pretty helpful when they see someone struggling, similar to the people talking to Whitney.  I learned during my 13.1 that long distance runners carry things like mustard packets and pickle juice on them.  One helpful runner gave me a mustard packet to help with the cramps, which may have worked for about 15 minutes.  Eating a little plain mustard?  Surprisingly not that bad.  The aftertaste is kinda like you just ate a cheeseburger.  I swore if I ever had another break from sanity and signed up for another half-marathon, I would go to Sam’s Club and buy mustard packets in bulk.

 

But good grief - Whitney’s histrionics throughout.

Whitney:  *crying in pain*

Glenn:  That’s enough.  I’m stopping this.

Whitney:  No!

Repeat ad nauseam every 400m.  Glenn, if you’re going to have a dad moment and call a halt to the shit show, sack up and actually DO it.  Tell the production team to get a golf cart over and get her crying ass off the course.  

 

Buddy comparing this to his addiction - a swing and a miss there.  Maybe in the behavior that got her to where walking 5 miles devolves her into a jibbering, crying mess, but not in persisting with doing what every other human being (barring any actual birth defects, accidents, and the like) has been doing since the dawn of mankind.  We know you’re fresh out of rehab, but save your sanctimonious bullshit to getting her to learn how to be healthy.  

Edited by Yajmele
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2 minutes ago, sainte-chapelle said:

I think it was telling when Buddy said his relationship with Heather was ALWAYS rocky. He is not that in to you Heather. The way she paints it they are soulmates, I think the reality was very different.

I noticed that too...he said it was always rocky. 

Previews for next week - Heather crying and saying she doesn't know if it's completely, 100% over.

Get some self-respect, woman! You got dumped. You're not the first person to get dumped and certainly won't be the last. You are a grown woman - stop acting like a 7th grader who got dumped by her playground crush. 

I get why she's friends with Twit now...they have delusion in common.

Oh and by the way sweetheart...Buddy was no prize. Get over it.

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5 minutes ago, Elizzikra said:

Maybe we just need a massive Intervention/My 600 Pound Life/My Big Fat Fabulous Life/My Strange Addiction mashup show???

I think that Heather thinks their relationship went south because of his addiction - so now that his addiction is being "fixed," they can be together.

I think that Buddy thinks the relationship was rocky separate and independent of his addiction and he is smart to recognize that he needs to stay away from Heather and avoid any romantic relationship for a long time. And he's probably sick of Whitney bringing it up because a) none of her business and b) his very serious addiction should be a bigger concern for Whitney than Heather's wee broken heart.

Yes you hit the nail on the head! I also hate that Twit took it upon herself to say "I guess I have to tell Heather." No you don't you stupid git it is NONE of your business.

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32 minutes ago, Sasha888 said:

STFU, Whitney. Seriously. Just SHUT THE FUCK UP.

All this "Oh, oh, ow, ow, hoo, hoo, hoo, AAAH, AAAH" - sit down and wait for the golf cart to come get you, you dumb ass.

I'm sorry but this just pissed me right off. I made less noise when I fell and dislocated my shoulder and ripped the tendons and ligaments off. And when, on the way home, I got stuck at O'Hare and got to sleep on a cot with my arm strapped against my body due to that injury. And I made less noise when I got home and had the surgery to have 4 screws put my f'd up shoulder back together.

Hell, my parents made less effing noise when they were dying of CANCER!

Shut up, bitch. Just shut...the fuck....UP!

Crawling along sideways using her hands on the cement parking thingy's to try and finish? Give me break. It's not about finishing, it's about everything being a great big pity party for Twitney.

I agree with one thing Buddy said - "If you finish with several people having to help you across the finish line, did you REALLY finish???"

SO fabulous. My God. Just shut up, you ridiculous, overgrown toddler.

Dude. I cannot see the episode for a while, but I can currently see the "oww oww hooo hooo ahhh ahhh owwwww" combined with Ugly Crying Face crystal clear. Spot on.

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1 minute ago, TurtlePower said:

Dude. I cannot see the episode for a while, but I can currently see the "oww oww hooo hooo ahhh ahhh owwwww" combined with Ugly Crying Face crystal clear. Spot on.

You will not be disappointed...plenty of Ugly Crying Face. Twit should be forced to have her "oww owww hoo hoo ahh ahh" crap as her ringtone. We all had to listen to it - she should have to listen to it, too! ;-) Maybe listening to that every time her phone rang would bring out and ACTUAL "warrior spirit" in her, and make her think about putting down that next slice of pizza.

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1 hour ago, JudgeyMcJudgyPants said:

Shut the fuck up bitch!!! Nothing is going to snap.  And you were just wanting to quit a second ago and now you’re getting pissed at Buddy for telling you to quit.

Buddy-she’s addicted to attention. 

Twit was giving out tons of mixed messages all along that 8k. Massive guilt-inducing on Dad. Bitching at Buddy.  Nice as pie to the medic.  She's a total jerk. 

Good for you Buddy for getting away from her.  

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Ok I sprained my foot BAD in Paris but I was on vacation and spent a ton of money to be there so I taped my foot and kept walking everyday for the two weeks I was there. I definitely made it worse and was on crutches for 3 weeks when I got home but it was worth it. I did not hoot and holler like Whit did but if she truely is in pain she should have stopped at 5.

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4 minutes ago, Ocean Chick said:

The big question in, did Twit ever cry, "Owwwwww, meyyyyya laig"?  Inquiring minds on the West Coast need to know.

No, but you're in for plenty of "Owwwww mah feet! Mah feet!" ;-)

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14 minutes ago, Yajmele said:

The vinegar in either helps to mitigate cramping. 

Would have the opposite effect on me.  Pickles and mustard are the two worst foods in my opinion.  If I tried to eat a package of mustard I would dry heave something terrible.  A packet of fruit snacks worked well for me at about the 8 mile mark of a half.

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Did she do all the race dramatics just to make her dad feel bad for "punishing" her with an 8K race? Was she /really/ that hysterical? I'm like Buddy. Disgusted with her. Either way, she's pretty sick in the head.

And oh! The Todd part! That was awful. I thought she was going to call Donna, who's used to getting her flesh but no. Todd doesn't get paid enough for that. Todd doesn't deserve that. Plus, how do you even agree to let that be filmed. How far do you have to be to get on your hands and knees, put your butt in the air and then bleat "but everything's covered!" when your huge ass is all in a blur?

This episode was extra disturbing. But I was pleasantly surprised by Donna. She finished the 8K in under an hour. That's pretty good!

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When you can't reach your own ass with a rag on a stick, you have officially lost any claim to a "fabulous life."

 

I can't believe I have sunk to detailing the finer points of this plotline but...

I believe that, technically speaking, she could reach her nether regions with the rag on the stick. The problem was that the rag soaked up the lotion rather than rubbing it into her skin.

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This episode was extra disturbing. But I was pleasantly surprised by Donna. She finished the 8K in under an hour. That's pretty good!

Donna started early - she began running when she saw Whitney pull out the tube of chub rub cream and the stick.

Does anyone remember that scene in Silence of the Lambs, when the senator's daughter is being held in the well by Jame Gumb and he says in a monotone "it rubs the lotion on its skin???" That was all I could hear when poor Todd was administering to the chub rub...

giphy.gif

Edited by Elizzikra
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1 minute ago, LordOfLotion said:
2 minutes ago, Ketzel said:

When you can't reach your own ass with a rag on a stick, you have officially lost any claim to a "fabulous life."

I think she was trying to reach the other hole...

Whatever the hell she was trying to reach, she couldn't...and nobody in your *fabulous*  life should have to do it for you. (And if you DO this for someone, you're an ENABLER).

Not usually a big Todd fan, and maybe he was "enabling", but he needs an extra 10 grand for doing this episode. At least.

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1 minute ago, Tosia said:

Twit was giving out tons of mixed messages all along that 8k. Massive guilt-inducing on Dad. Bitching at Buddy.  Nice as pie to the medic.  She's a total jerk. 

Good for you Buddy for getting away from her.  

Yeah, we know her type. Often referred to as a "Code W" (unoficially). "W" meaning "wimp". 
 

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The look on Whitney's face before the start of the race was sheer terror, she looked like they were about to wheel her off for life saving surgery. Like sis, WALKING a couple of miles at a brisk pace should not put that kind of fear into your heart. There was no time limit. She wasn't required to walk or run. She didn't have money at stake. The fact that the very idea that walking was putting her into a such a state is yet another clue that your body is neglected and needs self care. How many more signals does she need? How many excuses will her family and friends make for her?

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4 minutes ago, Elizzikra said:

I can't believe I have sunk to detailing the finer points of this plotline but...

I believe that, technically speaking, she could reach her nether regions with the rag on the stick. The problem was that the rag soaked up the lotion rather than rubbing it into her skin.

I think it would have worked if she had bent it at an angle and maybe tied a rubber glove around it so that it wouldn't absorb all the product.

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3 minutes ago, TurtlePower said:

Yeah, we know her type. Often referred to as a "Code W" (unoficially). "W" meaning "wimp". 
 

The way she was screaming I thought she broke her leg. I think someone already mentioned this but I think the dramatics are so the Glen and Babs feel guilty and never ask their poor baby girl to walk ever again. Hunter is not the only actor in that family.

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1 minute ago, PityFree said:

She has a rag on a stick!!!!!  Rag on a stick for personal hygiene!!  If that is not rock-bottom what is rock-bottom for her??

Yep...and the rag on the stick didn't work. She had to present her ass in the air for a friend to put chub rub cream on her. So we're actually even past "rag on a stick" rock bottom. 

And the way she laughed and brayed her way through Todd rubbing chub rub cream on her nether regions while being filmed pretty much tells me there IS no rock bottom.

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2 minutes ago, PityFree said:

She has a rag on a stick!!!!!  Rag on a stick for personal hygiene!!  If that is not rock-bottom what is rock-bottom for her??

Now, now, who among us hasn't used a ruler as a back scratcher? Haven't we all used a stick for self care at one time or another?

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My memory isn’t what is used to be, but was Buddy supposedly Whitney’s roommate since she’s been in the house? Heather mentioned not liking being alone in her bed, like Buddy was her bedmate. No wonder he isn’t paying Whitney rent, I wouldn’t either if I wasn't living there. 

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Now, now, who among us hasn't used a ruler as a back scratcher? Haven't we all used a stick for self care at one time or another?

I prefer a knitting needle.

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Heather mentioned not liking being alone in her bed, like Buddy was her bedmate. No wonder he isn’t paying Whitney rent, I wouldn’t either if I wasn't living there. 

I didn't get the sense that Buddy lived with Heather but that he sometimes spent the night. Maybe when she didn't have her kids? 

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