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S09.E03: I Will Survive


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2 minutes ago, MoodyGirl said:

Also--why did he marry Christine? He wasn't attracted to her....lived in different states....practically no courtship. Just seems strange. 

My guess is that he could have more sex without technically "cheating".

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24 minutes ago, laurakaye said:

Your whole post was spot-on but especially this.  Meri outed herself with her own stupid tweets, saying at first that she "wasn't home."  Someone calls her out on that and then she says, "oh, I meant - miscommunication."  So she's a lying liar who lies, and she's taking her passive-aggressive crap out on the kids - in this case Garrison, for whom she was, at one point, an actual "mom."

She's a piece of work.  She wants to isolate herself, but she also wants the fam'ly to come pounding down her door and tell her that nothing is the same without her.  Actually, what I think she wants is for Kody to be the one begging her to join the fam'ly, but I don't see that happening anymore, ever.  Gahhhh...how do these people even function with all of the multi-layered mind games they play with each other all day long??

 

If only Christine had the guts to point out the big fat spare tire Kody sports nowadays, as well as the fact that what's left of his shiny blond hair is a frazzled mess held together with mousse and a prayer.

Yes to the bolded words. Bingo. I can't hardly take her lies. That catfish whopper was the biggest. I don't think she knows the truth. The second she said she didn't know Garrison was home I rolled my eyes and called bullshit. Impossible. 

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OK.

Those watches he gave to Maddie and Caleb are TACKY, GAUDY, and just plain hideous. The microscopic New Testament is, kinda cool I guess? But no.

Christine, please go down an octave when you sing at the wedding. PLEASE.

These people are obsessed with dessert. I guess that's what happens when you live a life without sweet, sweet alcohol.

I love Janelle standing up for Hunter's bedroom. Mama Bear.

It seems like all these marriages are just business arrangements. They don't seem to love each other at all. It's just a kid-making business enterprise.

Does anyone else think Janelle is a closeted lesbian?

They are working Frisbees into the wedding sermon as a metaphor? Jesus. Frisbees and pinatas = Tackiest. Wedding. EVER.

Why does anyone think lipsynching and bad choreography is entertaining?

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16 minutes ago, MoodyGirl said:

Also--why did he marry Christine? He wasn't attracted to her....lived in different states....practically no courtship. Just seems strange. 

in my rudimentary understanding of the selection process, I believe the women make the call and the man assumes it's a sign from God.  So Christine wanted Kody (who admittedly was handsome then) and he goes along.  

2 minutes ago, Emma C said:

These people are obsessed with dessert. I guess that's what happens when you live a life without sweet, sweet alcoho

HA HA HA

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7 minutes ago, MoodyGirl said:

Also--why did he marry Christine? He wasn't attracted to her....lived in different states....practically no courtship. Just seems strange. 

It's been discussed over the years and the consensus has been that Kody may have been "guided told to" by his church.  Three wives is the magick number with the fundamental Mormons for the highest level of heavenhood planet ownership. It gets you all the goodies I guess.  Christine has always been open that she pursued Kody openly and shamelessly.  She stated early on about their marriage that "I loved Kody a lot, and I thinggk that he might have kinda loved me a little" is my best memory of what she said.  It's bloody sad.  Christine only ever wanted to be a third (and in her young, naive mind, last) wife.  And so she was so over the moon with him and then he married Janelle that she most likely then turned up the demands for his hand in marriage.  With her bloodline to the highest exulted ones of the Mormon ancestors Kody may have been directed (tho this has never been stated outright it has been implied years ago from the original blog with people from their community) to take up Christine as his numero threeo and that could also be the reason why there was little to no connection with their wedding...no enthusiasm with their wedding...and his overall disconnect towards Christine in any way, shape or form.

Judging by the conversations they had in this episode, it wasn't a hap happy time for either one of them...meaning that they are having trouble pulling any kind of light and sweet from the whole of that time.  There is obviously a whole lot more to their stories.  But that is the usual Brown way.

...my sarcasm might be heavier than usual...it's been a really sucky day and I've rolled my eyes a lot while watching this weeks episode of How the Train Wrecks in Las Vegas...

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1 hour ago, Adiba said:

Also, the production crew was there filming— not one of the producers called or texted Meri to say they were filming Garrison’s homecoming? Weird.

They probably hate her.  I could see her being a bitch to one or more of them, and it biting her in the butt.  

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I forgot to add my annoyance at Christine saying tonymykelti, as one word.  Reminds me of Robyn and her day-unaurorabreanna.  And, why did the Tony baloney piñata have red hair?  Frisbees?  At least it's probably a first at a wedding.  Original, but dumb.

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46 minutes ago, Janc said:

I just can't wait to see during the Mytoni wedding episode how well the 'frisbee tossing' will go at the end of the ceremony. People with bad aim all tossing them all over the place, at each other, etc. and I'm sure the country club is still finding those things still now on the grounds, 13 months later.  What a stupid idea...

Dear Younger Brown Children....PLEASE throw them at FT. PLEASE. 

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32 minutes ago, MoodyGirl said:

Also--why did he marry Christine? He wasn't attracted to her....lived in different states....practically no courtship. Just seems strange. 

In no particular order: there are millions of spirits in heaven anxiously and impatiently awaiting earthly bodies, only one of his two brood mares was steadily and reliably producing infants, Christine was plyg royalty, not a whole lot of women were receptive to his overtures.

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32 minutes ago, Emma C said:

They are working Frisbees into the wedding sermon as a metaphor? Jesus. Frisbees and pinatas = Tackiest. Wedding. EVER.

 

You know how some people use the exclamation "Jesus, Mary and Joseph"? I was reading a little too rapidly and processed your words as "Jesus, Frisbees and Pinatas". LOL

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I finally got around watching the end of the episode and saw the scene with Christine cutting up her dress. I had no idea how miserable her wedding day was or how much she hated her dress. It really explains a lot about why she fled the stage crying when she found out Kody had helped Robyn pick out her wedding gown. Apparently it's still quite the sore spot.

I can see why.

That really was the shittiest, most ugliest unflattering wedding dress of all time. It looked like she got tangled up in a parachute after crashing into a hot air balloon.  There is not a supermodel on earth who could have made that dress work. Chubby Christine had no chance. I am surprised she ever spoke to her mother again.

 When Christine asked her daughters if any of them had an interest in wearing the dress, didn't Gwendolyn say she would wear it ? Was that before she tried it on ? LOL. I hope she was just being recalcitrant and was not actually disappointed to see the dress cut up. Although Christine was doing her a favor if Gwen was serious. That dress needed to die.

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1 minute ago, Celia Rubenstein said:

I finally got around watching the end of the episode and saw the scene with Christine cutting up her dress. I had no idea how miserable her wedding day was or how much she hated her dress. It really explains a lot about why she fled the stage crying when she found out Kody had helped Robyn pick out her wedding gown. Apparently it's still quite the sore spot.

I can see why.

That went right over my head. Nice catch.

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3 hours ago, Mariareads said:

Once Utah was mentioned as a yearning place to move back to by Robyn and Kody things began to fall into place for me. They have ALL talked about it. They just behaved as if they haven't.  Enter Meri. How can I get my own house? What if this happens? I need to get the hell out of here.  Just sayin'

Actually it sounds like they want to move to Cedar City, which is where the Southern Utah chapter of their Church is based. Meri's BnB is right up the road in the next town up. 

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9 minutes ago, Celia Rubenstein said:

When Christine asked her daughters if any of them had an interest in wearing the dress, didn't Gwendolyn say she would wear it ? Was that before she tried it on ? LOL.

I did guffaw when Gwendolyn (?) had the dress on then turned around and ran away saying "wait I have to go get pregnant!" Good comic timing on that girl, hahaha.  I really don't get why Christine was so sad about giving up the dress as it sounds like the wedding was a terrible day, why not be happy to get rid of it and the bad memories?

Other random thoughts.... As we saw in People, Mykelti ended up walking back up the aisle after the ceremony wearing Tony's jacket around her shoulders.  Why would she not arrange to get a shawl, pashmina, etc. once they saw the wedding day was going to be cold. Outside. in December. in a STRAPLESS DRESS.  

Anyone else see Janelle's bottom lip quivering and being near tears at the end of the scene with Kody re. Maddie bedroom/bathroom?  when he said something like "I won't let it interrupt your life..." or something snarky like that.  What a dick.

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3 hours ago, steff13 said:

I kind of love Christine.  She seems like fun.  And I like her relationship with her kids.  I cracked up when Gwendolyn was wearing the wedding dress and she said she was going to go get pregnant. 

I love her too. I can be a bit OTT myself sometimes. I'm just a dramatic, quirky dork of a person. I don't really care what people think, and that's how I view Christine. She's not trying to be someone she's not. 

 

3 hours ago, gunderda said:

I do kind of wonder if Meri was suppose to be gone longer that day and they didn't know she was home already and just decided to not bother her with it. But I also fail to believe that NO ONE saw her come home.  

I could see her sneaking in in the night, so no one would notice and they wouldn't come round bugging her to be part of the family affairs. 

 

2 hours ago, TurtlePower said:

He does look better with it back, more polished. The surfer dude look he cannot get away with any more. 

He can't. I've never liked it, but it's BAD now. He looks like Bozo. He needs to shave it. 

 

1 hour ago, SunnyBeBe said:

In the photo of Kody and Christine in their wedding attire....both of them appear to be at least 40 pounds lighter than they are now. 

Christine is lighter NOW. She tried her dress on and it was very loose; it did not fit that way on her wedding day. Kody is definitely heavier now, though. But, who isn't? 

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Mykelti and Tony seemed to be the only two not happy about Madison's announcement.  I don't get it.  If Madison had made the announcement at their wedding, I could understand their not being happy as she would have been stealing their thunder.  But Madison made the announcement at her own birthday celebration, where she's already the guest of honour.

A married couple needs a bathroom of their own?  Really?? Because Mr. Ponga and I share one with our kid. Because we live in a small house with only one bathroom on the second floor. And it's just fine. And if the kid gets married and decides to move back home because of mysterious "circumstances", we would not be renovating to accommodate him.  Because the kid would be an adult, and while we'd be happy to help out temporarily, the key word is "temporarily". 

Is Aspyn engaged? Was that part of the episode? Or was that mentioned during a commercial break? Because I didn't catch that up here in Canada.

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I'm going to watch the episode again because I was half asleep the first time but I know that look on Mykelti's face during the pregnancy announcement. It's the same one my sister gave me when I told my family I was getting married. She also asked me when I was due. I wasn't pregnant. 

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Does anyone have an opinion as to why the family is so intent on showing their love for Tony.  I mean, there's normal behavior of how you welcome a person into the family and then there's BROWN style.  I think it's really odd. 

They are trying to desperately to convince themselves they love Tony, when they really can't stand his ass. Its an act of desperation when you know there is no getting away from something. I do the same thing with my job;-). You can tell every time Robyn or Janelle feel the need to say "No really, I do love him so much, BUT....".

Also, I feel a little bad for Mykelti in regards to Maddie. Maddie is already favored over Mykelti, and now she just HAS to be pregnant and move back in right around the time of Mykelti's wedding. She couldn't wait to get pregnant until after Mykelti's wedding, and give her her moment??

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1 hour ago, Kyanight said:

My guess is that he could have more sex without technically "cheating".

Nah, I actually think Kody is more concerned with the planet-building/ego aspect of polygamy than the actual sex. I think he picked Christine because he simply wanted A 3rd wife, another child-bearer. Christine was obviously into him and came from a very well known family in their culture. 

 

5 minutes ago, ShellB said:

I'm going to watch the episode again because I was half asleep the first time but I know that look on Mykelti's face during the pregnancy announcement. It's the same one my sister gave me when I told my family I was getting married. She also asked me when I was due. I wasn't pregnant. 

Dang. Someone screenshot this face. I honestly missed it, and have now deleted the show from my DVR. 

 

2 minutes ago, Kellyee said:

Also, I feel a little bad for Mykelti in regards to Maddie. Maddie is already favored over Mykelti, and now she just HAS to be pregnant and move back in right around the time of Mykelti's wedding. She couldn't wait to get pregnant until after Mykelti's wedding, and give her her moment??

Mykleti announced HER engagement while they were busy planning MADDIE'S wedding, and even wanted to do it in the summer, right after Maddie's. She was shut down and forced to wait a few months. So I'm not sure why Maddie needs to hold off on her baby news. I don't think it really takes away from Mykelti's wedding. She didn't announce her pregnancy AT the wedding. I think it's a bit much to expect that no one says anything important about themselves during the weeks and months it can take to plan a wedding. Given how big their family is, some of the younger kids would have to wait until they're 58 to get married. 

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Meri, you really aren't even married to Kody anymore.  You could just walk away if you are done. Remember the divorce?  It wasn't a celestial divorce, it was real. Robyn is his legal wife now.  I guess she wants her TLC pay and have the family funds to buy her new house to escape to.  It's funny when the other wives have problems juggling the kids around and Meri has her place just living alone and will soon have 2 houses.

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24 minutes ago, Pingaponga said:

Mykelti and Tony seemed to be the only two not happy about Madison's announcement.  I don't get it.  If Madison had made the announcement at their wedding, I could understand their not being happy as she would have been stealing their thunder.  But Madison made the announcement at her own birthday celebration, where she's already the guest of honour.

Because life is a party, and Mykelti and Tony are the guests of honor.

Edited by suomi
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3 hours ago, Gothish520 said:

Irregardless is indeed a word. It is informal and controversial, but it exists and is defined.

I stand corrected. Your are right. Sort of. 

From good ole' Miriam Webster:

Is irregardless a word?

Irregardless was popularized in dialectal American speech in the early 20th century. Its increasingly widespread spoken use called it to the attention of usage commentators as early as 1927. The most frequently repeated remark about it is that "there is no such word." There is such a word, however. It is still used primarily in speech, although it can be found from time to time in edited prose. Its reputation has not risen over the years, and it is still a long way from general acceptance. Use regardless instead.

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I also noticed Janelle mention her mother's room in the house.  I guess her mom and Kody's mom aren't staying together anymore.  Noticed Mykelti and Tony's less than enthusiastic response to the baby news.   I don't think Maddie needed to wait.  Maddie was still in the wedding planning stage when Mykelti got engaged, Mykelti didn't care about stealing Maddie's thunder.  It's a huge family things are going to overlap.  I don't get the Meri miscommunication excuse.  Didn't they know she was home?  Did she just arrive home and not let anyone know.  Best part was the coming attractions which appeared to show Christine annoyed about Meri saying her mom wants to live in the B&B and not have it be a business.  

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1 hour ago, littlemommy said:

I agree with all of the snark here. Every single bit. But I, personally, haven’t been able to move on emotionally since I saw Christine pillowcase-sized bag of chocolate chips last night in the “hot chocolate” scene. What SIZE is that? 5 pounds? What’s the next size up, a barrel of chocolate chips?

 

3FB8275E-EFE8-44A1-AEC2-43E27AAAEAB6.jpeg

Polygamist gals routinely buy everything in bulk. 

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15 hours ago, taragel said:

Although I don't understand what made Kody and Christine like each other better suddenly. (The fact that he really didn't like her/wasn't attracted to her/wasn't into it....is so weird. Christine honestly seems to be the easiest to love out of all the wives--so it's always been surprising that he wasn't into her.)

According to their book, Kody was “forced” to marry Christine. Her father had been getting inquiries about her, but she kept turning them down because Kody was the guy she wanted.  Meri was having difficulties sharing her husband with Janelle, so I can well imagine she didn’t want him to take another wife.  As to why they suddenly like each other better, I believe that is because at the present time, she is probably the only wife with whom he is having marital relations.  I think the reason why he accepted “chubby” Janelle and not “chubby” Christine is quite simple; he was attracted to Janelle.  To this day, I maintain Kody and Janelle had an affair while she was married to Meri’s brother, and that’s the reason why she divorced her husband. I believe that is why Meri can’t stand Janelle. 

I think the Browns are toeing the line with Tony and his family because they are afraid of being labeled racists.  Tony made a comment that he was surprise as to how quickly his mother took to Mykelti.  Why, because she is Caucasian?  I agree with the posters that said perhaps he should have married a Mexican girl. 

I’ve noticed that for this season, filming is mostly done at Janelle’s or Christine’s.  I have a feeling the legal Mrs. Brown finds the cameras disruptive and do not want them in her home.  However, I wager she doesn’t have a problem cashing the checks. 

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4 hours ago, gunderda said:

 

Meri saying she must have missed the memo for Garrison's home coming was very odd.  Kody said the dinner was going to be late.  So when was Garrison originally suppose to be home?  Maybe the next day?? 

There's some shenanigans going on there..... 

Always.  There is always some shenanigans going on somewhere in the cuddle-sac.  As long as you remember this idea, you will save many brain cells.  If you try and figure it all out, you will end up with a headache and you could kill the brain cells that help you find your car keys. 

My keys are in my purse.  See, it works.

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18 minutes ago, Palomar said:

Meri, you really aren't even married to Kody anymore.  You could just walk away if you are done. Remember the divorce?  It wasn't a celestial divorce, it was real. Robyn is his legal wife now.  I guess she wants her TLC pay and have the family funds to buy her new house to escape to.  It's funny when the other wives have problems juggling the kids around and Meri has her place just living alone and will soon have 2 houses.

I think she’s finally realizing she was ‘had’ when it came to the divorce. She  thought it was her opportunity to gain favor with Kody but he made it clearly very quickly that it was a real divorce. Meanwhile she didn’t negotiate a settlement or any kind of financial independence. Kody still controls the TLC money. I really hope this is all setting up her leaving. I think it’s best for her and for the family. The other wives ar at a different place in their lives and Kody doesn’t want her. So why stick around. 

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So many times last evening while watching the show I wanted to say 'stop talking Christine'.  Honestly she gave me a headache as she went on and on and on and on.  Geeez.

I can hardly take Meri anymore.  Really she is so out of touch with the family she does not know Garrison is home and there's a party right next door.  No tv folks told her and none of her gigantic family told her.   We are to believe her as she tells the story with her smerky, smiling face.  Uggg.

She's no longer 'first' wife and it's killing her. 

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1 hour ago, ghoulina said:

Nah, I actually think Kody is more concerned with the planet-building/ego aspect of polygamy than the actual sex. I think he picked Christine because he simply wanted A 3rd wife, another child-bearer. Christine was obviously into him and came from a very well known family in their culture. 

 

I have always felt that Kody went into polygamy to feed his ego, anything else was just extraneous BS, and he figured out how to do it under the cloak of polygamy.  Young Kody, he of the Perfectly Coiffed Hair and Cat-Eating-Canary toothpaste smile felt that he was so tasty, any woman would be lucky to have him.  He took wallflower Meri first and got her on board, then had a lil' somethin'-somethin' with his sister-in-law Janelle, and then here comes this bubbly blonde chasing him all over town who happens to be from plyg royalty, so even though she grossed him out, he married her and brought his magic number up to three, and his ego up to a million.

Edited by laurakaye
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4 minutes ago, laurakaye said:

I have always felt that Kody went into polygamy to feed his ego, anything else was just extraneous BS, and he figured out how to do it under the cloak of polygamy.  Young Kody, he of the Perfectly Coiffed Hair and Cat-Eating-Canary toothpaste smile felt that he was so tasty, any woman would be lucky to have him.  He took wallflower Meri first and got her on board, then had a lil' somethin'-somethin' with his sister-in-law Janelle, and then here comes this bubbly blonde chasing him all over town who happens to be from plyg royalty, so even though she grossed him out, he married her and brought his magic number up to three, and his ego up to a million.

I think it came up to a million after he married Robyn.  A person would have to have been blind not to see that he was crazy about her, to the exclusion of the other three wives and all of his kids.  She was the only person who mattered in his world for those first few years of marriage.

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16 hours ago, taragel said:

So now the B&B will no longer be a B&B just a home for Meri's mom that they're going to buy? That's...something.

Except that since this was all filmed long ago (which makes this all so snoozeworthy) we know that it is currently an "inn".  And sycophantic fans (well, at least 2 of them) stayed there recently an posted a glowing review.  Take that with a grain of salt.

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25 minutes ago, Jeanne222 said:

So many times last evening while watching the show I wanted to say 'stop talking Christine'.  Honestly she gave me a headache as she went on and on and on and on.  Geeez.

I can hardly take Meri anymore.  Really she is so out of touch with the family she does not know Garrison is home and there's a party right next door.  No tv folks told her and none of her gigantic family told her.   We are to believe her as she tells the story with her smerky, smiling face.  Uggg.

She's no longer 'first' wife and it's killing her. 

Smerky, great word!  You are right.  Meri was first, and speshul, and entitled, forever and ever, amen.  Mariah, same thing.  How that kind of woman thinks she can be happy with sharing a man is way beyond my reach.  It's "poor, poor, pitiful me" ever since Robyn, at least.  

Get over yourself.  You aren't, and never should have been, lording it over your "best friends."  I have a very vague memory of Meri saying that about the others, early on.  Must have been in that week's script.

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38 minutes ago, Jeanne222 said:

So many times last evening while watching the show I wanted to say 'stop talking Christine'.  Honestly she gave me a headache as she went on and on and on and on.  Geeez.

I can hardly take Meri anymore.  Really she is so out of touch with the family she does not know Garrison is home and there's a party right next door.  No tv folks told her and none of her gigantic family told her.   We are to believe her as she tells the story with her smerky, smiling face.  Uggg.

She's no longer 'first' wife and it's killing her. 

I love Christine - even when she was running around the house yelling, I thought she was hilarious. Life's too short, why not be silly and have fun!

I know we've all been saying it, but how do you not know a party is going on in your own family cul-de-sac? I know when the strangers down the street are having a gathering, never mind my own family next door!

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1 hour ago, Pingaponga said:

 

Is Aspyn engaged? Was that part of the episode? Or was that mentioned during a commercial break? Because I didn't catch that up here in Canada.

Yep - it was mentioned during a commercial break.  It's being talked about in Christine's thread more. 

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That routine at the bridal shower was uncomfortable to watch.  WHY did they do it???   And isn't lingerie at a bridal shower sort of the usual thing, unless the invitations specifically state a "housewares", or "linen" shower?  

I was shocked that Kody didn't tell Meri she had to make room for Madison & Caleb.    I know it's the "every wife has her own place" thing, but I am surprised he didn't bring that up as an option.  Which of course would make sense.   And it would have given Meri an even better excuse to be gone to Utah for longer stretches of time.    It probably stems from the long standing dislike Meri & Janelle have for each other.  

Ok, the pinata's.  Seriously???   How ironic is it that FT doesn't know the meaning of the word Tacky, but he is by definition tacky.   Now frisbee's.  Oh it just keeps getting better. 

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12 minutes ago, notnowimbusy said:

And isn't lingerie at a bridal shower sort of the usual thing, unless the invitations specifically state a "housewares", or "linen" shower?  

Not necessarily which is why they all register at one or more stores for both shower and wedding gifts. I think there are probably some themed showers (linens, housewares, lingerie) but, at least in my world, it's a catch all.

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1 hour ago, ghoulina said:

Thank you! Yes, I'd say she looks less than pleased. 

Tony had the same look on his face. They both just sat there cold as ice. Tony is more of an attention whore than Mykelti. He lives for it. Now he's got competition with the beloved first son in law  Caleb back in town. How long before Mykelti gets pregnant and they move back home, too? The countdown begins.....

Edited by bichonblitz
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