S05.E06: 100 Feet From Catastrophe

[HunterHunted]

6 hours ago, ZaldamoWilder said:

This.  I actually think her job is harder.   She the liaison between the guests and their services.  It doesn't really matter what sort of fuckery is going on behind the scenes, her job is to make sure it all works out to be a stellar experience for them. 

It is psychologically and intellectually the harder of the jobs. Bri and Jen have to physically clean and serve, but Kate has to continually observe and assess any deficiencies in the service, like Jen not using trays to serve drinks. Or asking the chef which way the plates should be served and making sure that her stews know what that means. Last night Kate could be heard asking what the position of the plate should be when they put the plates in front of the guests (tomatoes at 6). Or over on Med, a bunch of guests gave Hannah the task of finding them a flight leaving at a certain time, but going to "some place warm." WTF does that even mean? That's a near impossible task. Being the chief stew is about making sure no guest knows what's going on under the hood or in the factory.

[movingtargetgal]

2 hours ago, yourmomiseasy said:

I'd be finding all kinds of excuses to make her do things that mess up her hair.  I'm mean like that.  At my old job we had a guy that had both his wife and girlfriend working for us.  Totally stupid.  He was working there, started having an affair, and then got his wife a job there.  I guess he thought it'd work out because his wife worked from home.  I was leading a project that both ladies were working on and kept making excuses for them to talk to each other or work together on parts of it just to see him squirm and freak out

Your screen name should be yourmomisabadass. :)  

[rho]

11 hours ago, ghoulina said:

And I hated that she took the ten minutes she was given to call her daughter and instead of asking the kid about her day, Jen starts CRYING and unloading all her grievances on a grade schooler! 

That made me livid!! She's already leaving her kid for months at a time and then she only calls to bitch about her job???

11 hours ago, ghoulina said:

See, this is what I tend to think. Again, I don't know enough about boats....but if often seems like EJ is pretty clueless too. I think he likes being bosun because he thinks she can shift the blame downward when something goes wrong. 

So true!! He reminds me of that hair model guy from way back. At first I gave him the benefit of the doubt because he's jumping on board in the middle of the season which is a tough position. He's obviously going to have to work twice as hard to gain any respect. But it pains me to see his smug face and I don't get the impression he's significantly more experienced than Nico. The two of them are bumbling idiots on a power trip. Mostly I sympathize with Baker and Bruno. I almost forgot about the latter until he was going around complaining about how all their orders contradict each other.

5 hours ago, Alonzo Mosely FBI said:

I am having a hard time following the tip. Do they make $1700 for just like 3 days? On top of what kind of salary? I have a hard time on the tip reveal figuring out what kind of relative windfall it is. Or isn't.

I'm pretty sure yachtie salaries start around $25-30K with captains and departments heads making much more. It's a healthy salary for anyone who climbs the ranks. Of course there are some who dip in and out or only use yachting to supplement other income. 

But everyone on BD is making bank!!! They get their salary/stipend for the season + Bravo's appearance fee + insane tips. Vets like Capt Lee and Kate are probably raking in 6-figures every time they do a season on BD. My guess is the others make more in two months than most people make in a year. Which is why I love every time Kate reminds them to shut the fuck up and stop complaining because all things considered, they make obscene amounts of money.

[gingerella]

I'm growing very tired of watching Bri try to dry hump Nico every second she can. There's a special place in hell for people who prey on others whom they know to be in a relationship... Her coy, "oh he never talks about his girlfriend in front of me...I guess he wants to be single really..."  Bitch please.

Jen? Shut.The.Fuck.Up. A responsible parent does not dump their work shit onto a small child and start crying to boot.  But then again, a responsible parent also does not abandon their kid to follow their stupid dream to become a 3rd stew either. And her whining about her child thwarting who she could have been? Dumbass, if you weren't a sloppy drunk and if you'd used a condom none of this would be an issue. Stupid people this season, Nico included.

[hoosier80]

Jenderella, what a moron.  She's actually a Realtor in the Jacksonville area.  Yes, I had to find out what that dingbat does for money (my first thought was that Daddy paid the bills for her and her daughter).  The Bravo bio said something that she was the top Realtor (didn't specify what - state, area, brokerage - probably in her dreams).   The washing machines fiasco, give me a break.  The freaking bottles of Tide have a cap that you can use for measuring the correct amount for the load.  I've never had a machine overflow due to too much detergent.  Either producers added some or she did it on her own to get more tv time.  She's gonna be a breakout star (well again, in her dreams).  I have to think her Realtor days are dwindling, as I sure wouldn't trust her to sell me a birdhouse.  

Then she gets on the phone with her daughter, after whining about it (right before dinner service), and all she does is whine to her little girl about what a bad boss she has.  What is Jen Jr supposed to do for her?  Betting she's the type of mother who treats her kid like a friend or buddy.   Jenderella  probably whines more than her daughter; kid is like I can't out whine her, why bother.

Chris, long time coming.  Nico needs to dial it way down.  EJ may be a jerk, but EJ didn't put himself in charge.  If Nico was that upset about it, and if he had any balls, he'd have had a chat with the Captain right away.

No he acts like a baby and does passive aggressive shit, and tries to get the rest of the deck crew on his side.  Yeah, you're so not ready for a Bosun position.  EJ may not be the best, but not your job to show him up and try to get him fired.  Makes you look terribly immature.

I would like these nitwits to have had the 'pleasure' of working for some of my prior bosses.  They would've been fired by Day 2 or 3 at the latest.  I had some that put up with zero shit, zero attitude - period.  You didn't like it, there was the door.  They'd find someone who wanted a job and who could do the work.  

[ryebread]

15 hours ago, HunterHunted said:

Stupid Sierra kept forgetting her walkie. It was late in the season and Sierra was still forgetting her walkie. Additionally, Kate tied a string, not her walkie, to Sierra's wrist.

I agree Sierra needed to keep her walkie on.  That's a non-negotiable as crew.  But I'm pretty sure Kate tied the walkie to her wrist.  @RedHawk upthread said Kate taped the walkie to Sierra??  Ordering her to keep it attached to her belt would have been more humane.  But creepier was the way she continued to harangue her.

Quote

Jen never once indicated that the afro wig hurt her head. She just didn't want to wear it. Now that we know how much time Jen spends on her hair, even to the detriment of doing her job, Jen's reluctance to wear the wig makes so much sense. Jen's a vainglorious dipshit.

I said she was uncomfortable.  (But maybe it hurt, too.)  She was itching her scalp. I've worn wigs at Halloween parties in October over my long hair and they were uncomfortable as hell.  And I wasn't running hot plates of food and going up and down stairs in tropical heat. 

Nor being harassed by Kate - who would do well to put a wig over that hay she calls hair.  God. I just watched that scene again. After decorating the disco, Kate was insufferable. Hate hur and hur hair. But I DO agree that Jen's a vainglorious dipshit.

Kate's TH re: Jen wearing the wig:  "She's like Sampson.  Take away her hair and she felt, like, powerless."  And there it is.  Just the way Kate likes 'em. 

[ryebread]

10 hours ago, gingerella said:

Jen? Shut.The.Fuck.Up. A responsible parent does not dump their work shit onto a small child and start crying to boot.  But then again, a responsible parent also does not abandon their kid to follow their stupid dream to become a 3rd stew either.

The crying to her 9 year old.  If that's something she does on the regular, maybe it's better that the little girl spends time with her dad.

Speaking of which - I'm not ready to rake Jen over for leaving her daughter for however many weeks it takes to film this.

I doubt she's making a career out of stewing - ha, can you imagine anyone actually hiring her again? It's already been established she makes a living selling real estate.  My guess is that this was a one off - something fun to stroke the fame bug. 

If it takes 5 or 6 weeks to film, who knows - maybe the girl's dad has custody for a month on, a month off.  Dunno.  Captain Lee had 5 kids.  I'm not sure of his situation, nor of their ages when he started his charter career but I'm not ready to call Jen a terrible parent for taking a month off in life to do something like this. As long as the child is left in competent hands. 

Now, the crying and complaining is a whole 'nother issue.

[bichonblitz]

22 hours ago, ZaldamoWilder said:

What in the everloving oceanliner is your 7? 8? year old supposed to do about your hard day?   I think I'dve had more patience if she'd gotten it together for the phone call and then heard that teeny weeny voice say mommy I miss you and then unraveled.   But dude your baby ain't here to fix your life, the hell?

That poor kid must live in a world of dysfunction with a mother like Jen. 

And whyyyyy is Jen so obsessed with her hair? It's a thin, limp, stringy mess, with color that looks like it comes from the $10 Clairol box. It cracks me up when she spends so much time trying to make the ever popular "beachy waves" look and ends up with banana curls!

[gingerella]

15 hours ago, hoosier80 said:

Jenderella, what a moron.  She's actually a Realtor in the Jacksonville area. 

Seriously? I wouldn't buy a Barbie Playhouse from that nitwit.

[Jsage]

Quote

Nico needs to dial it way down.  EJ may be a jerk, but EJ didn't put himself in charge.  If Nico was that upset about it, and if he had any balls, he'd have had a chat with the Captain right away.

Exactly this. Nico doesn't have to respect EJ immediately but he does have to follow his orders anyway. That's how the chain of command works. And Nico definitely does have to respect the captain of the boat. This was the Captain Lee's decision. If Nico can't handle it, he needs to respectfully leave.

Edited October 12, 2017 by Jsage

[ghoulina]

23 hours ago, yourmomiseasy said:

I'd be finding all kinds of excuses to make her do things that mess up her hair.  I'm mean like that.  At my old job we had a guy that had both his wife and girlfriend working for us.  Totally stupid.  He was working there, started having an affair, and then got his wife a job there.  I guess he thought it'd work out because his wife worked from home.  I was leading a project that both ladies were working on and kept making excuses for them to talk to each other or work together on parts of it just to see him squirm and freak out.

 

23 hours ago, yourmomiseasy said:

 

Not sure why the double quote, but this made me laugh. Jen drives me crazy with her hair obsession. 

[RedHawk]

8 hours ago, ryebread said:

I agree Sierra needed to keep her walkie on.  That's a non-negotiable as crew.  But I'm pretty sure Kate tied the walkie to her wrist.  @RedHawk upthread said Kate taped the walkie to Sierra??  Ordering her to keep it attached to her belt would have been more humane.  But creepier was the way she continued to harangue her.

...

Oops, maybe it was tied, not taped, but I do remember Kate attaching the walkie to Sierra's wrist and Sierra expressing discomfort, which Kate totally ignored.

[RedHawk]

When Chris left I sorta missed him. He agreed to entertain for the casino party and when Kate asked, "Do you know how to deal anything?" he replied, "Attitude." That gave me a good chuckle. Seemed like he did a good job with the blackjack table and thus helped earn his last tip.

My take is that he auditioned for the heck of it, got the part, signed up planning to enjoy himself and his paid Caribbean "vacation". He had no idea he'd actually have to work hard at the deckhand stuff or risk looking like a lazy idiot. Rather than buckle down he got even more slack, maybe ready for that plane ticket home. I wonder if Bravo pays the full salary if you get fired? For all we know, his "role" was to be the green guy with attitude. He was well pleased to be put up in a hotel room on St. Barth's with lots of cash in his pocket. 

He wasn't the worst guy who's been cut loose.

[ghoulina]

I did like when Chris joked about getting wifi and renting out the bilge as an Air B&B. I thought the dude was lazy as hell and not self aware, but yes - he was not the worst they've sent packing. 

[HunterHunted]

28 minutes ago, RedHawk said:

Oops, maybe it was tied, not taped, but I do remember Kate attaching the walkie to Sierra's wrist and Sierra expressing discomfort, which Kate totally ignored.

This is the clip. Kate ties a long string on the walkie and puts the walkie on Sierra's belt clip. Kate ties the other end of the string around Sierra's wrist. It's not like there is a walkie physically hanging off of Sierra's wrist. However, Sierra only had the string around her wrist for a minute or two before she cut it off.

http://www.bravotv.com/below-deck/season-4/episode-13/videos/has-kate-chastain-gone-too-far

[Adultosaurus]

7 hours ago, RedHawk said:

When Chris left I sorta missed him. He agreed to entertain for the casino party and when Kate asked, "Do you know how to deal anything?" he replied, "Attitude." That gave me a good chuckle. Seemed like he did a good job with the blackjack table and thus helped earn his last tip.

My take is that he auditioned for the heck of it, got the part, signed up planning to enjoy himself and his paid Caribbean "vacation". He had no idea he'd actually have to work hard at the deckhand stuff or risk looking like a lazy idiot. Rather than buckle down he got even more slack, maybe ready for that plane ticket home. I wonder if Bravo pays the full salary if you get fired? For all we know, his "role" was to be the green guy with attitude. He was well pleased to be put up in a hotel room on St. Barth's with lots of cash in his pocket. 

He wasn't the worst guy who's been cut loose.

I agree, but where does he go from here?  It was televised that he's sorta crap at any job...was that really worth 15 mins of "fame"?

[RedHawk]

11 hours ago, Adultosaurus said:

I agree, but where does he go from here?  It was televised that he's sorta crap at any job...was that really worth 15 mins of "fame"?

I get the feeling he thinks he can "get laid" plenty from it. Ugh.

[RedHawk]

18 hours ago, HunterHunted said:

This is the clip. Kate ties a long string on the walkie and puts the walkie on Sierra's belt clip. Kate ties the other end of the string around Sierra's wrist. It's not like there is a walkie physically hanging off of Sierra's wrist. However, Sierra only had the string around her wrist for a minute or two before she cut it off.

http://www.bravotv.com/below-deck/season-4/episode-13/videos/has-kate-chastain-gone-too-far

The clip wouldn't play for me but I believe you and stand corrected. Maybe my memory of the scene where I felt Kate "wrenched" the pen from Jen's hand is off, too. I totally felt Kate's frustration with little "Jenderella's" slowness and whiny attitude so I kinda didn't blame her even though telling guests Jen was shit at her job was a bit much and not at all professional. We have to remember that Kate is not only dealing with guests but cameras and  trying to "make a good show". I hope next season (if there is one) won't be filled with greenies and fools with attitude. One of the most interesting storylines for me has been Matt's -- good chef, very competent at his job, but with a drinking problem that he actually takes stock of after embarrassing himself. I loved that he pulled off the fresh lobster lunch and the final tasting menu. I like seeing crew who are multifaceted yet mostly mature in their behavior, or at least attempting to act like adults.  

[HunterHunted]

1 hour ago, RedHawk said:

The clip wouldn't play for me but I believe you and stand corrected. Maybe my memory of the scene where I felt Kate "wrenched" the pen from Jen's hand is off, too. I totally felt Kate's frustration with little "Jenderella's" slowness and whiny attitude so I kinda didn't blame her even though telling guests Jen was shit at her job was a bit much and not at all professional. We have to remember that Kate is not only dealing with guests but cameras and  trying to "make a good show".

The thing with Kate is that she's not good at addressing issues in a diplomatic way. Though ironically, I think she's gotten better at it over the years. She was a stroppy cow to Amy and their issue was just a matter of style. Amy just seemed to have been trained a warmer more personal style of stewardship and concierge services. However, Kate was far more patient with Sierra than Sierra had any right to deserve. Sierra was flighty and dumb. She had to be told things again and again. Rocky was a brat who clearly didn't want to be a stew. Though, I don't think she could have handled being on the deck crew or being a chef either (oreos, oysters, and grenadine y'all), but she wasn't dumb. 

Jen is slow, whiny, and clearly has attention issues when she isn't invested in what she's doing. She's also so self-involved that she ends up coming off as dumb. Sierra was criminally dumb, dumber than Jenderella, but Kate was nicer to Sierra. I don't know if it was because Kate realized Sierra doesn't have the capacity or if Kate is just over it this season. I've seen Kate backsliding a bit. She's bitchier than she's been in the last two seasons, but Lee is also phoning it in too this season.

1 hour ago, RedHawk said:

I hope next season (if there is one) won't be filled with greenies and fools with attitude. One of the most interesting storylines for me has been Matt's -- good chef, very competent at his job, but with a drinking problem that he actually takes stock of after embarrassing himself. I loved that he pulled off the fresh lobster lunch and the final tasting menu. I like seeing crew who are multifaceted yet mostly mature in their behavior, or at least attempting to act like adults.  

This show can only handle one or two people who don't know what they are doing. It can handle a couple of weirdos and eccentrics, but not incompetents. Leon was a lazy misogynist, but he knew how to cook. Matt's has been the only interesting arc this season. It's not like there is anything compelling about the tales of woe from Jenderella, Bri's quest for Nico's d, Chris Brown's laziness and incompetence, Bruno's slowly growing competence, Baker's being-there-ness, or the pitched petty power struggle between Nico and EJ. We're getting Kyle back. He's decently competent, a hard worker, and such a weirdo that I love watching him. The rest of the cast is so bad that I have my doubt about future seasons.

[BogoGog24]

It’s interesting to note that none of the newbies have been given individual threads this season. They’re not interesting enough.

[stacyasp]

On 10/10/2017 at 7:00 PM, ryebread said:

Agreed.  Same goes for any public washroom toilet paper - fancy folds or not.  The first 4 squares go directly into the toilet.  Cuz I don't know who touched 'em when they were tearing their sheets off.  Neurotic much? LOL

Captain, re:  the big tip:  "Not bad for people who don't drink."  WTH does that mean?

Omg I do that too?

[SunnyBeBe]

If Nico had any reasoning going on in his head, he'd think about how he might move up in the mind of the Captain.  Best way would be to take direction from EJ, do a stellar job and have EJ tell Captain Lee, at the end of the season, that Nico stepped up, did great and is ready for more responsibility.  With his insubordination, I don't think EJ is going to have a lot positive to say about him.  I guess Nico hasn't thought it through. 

You know what I'm missing?  English and Aussie accents.....love them.  

Edited October 14, 2017 by SunnyBeBe

[FamilyVan]

The problem with Nico is as soon as EJ came on board he allied himself with the crew and not EJ.  Prior to EJ arriving, Nico was complaining about the crew, and even went to Captain Lee with his frustrations.  He was assuming Captn Lee would scrap Chris or Bruno and get more qualified deck worker.  Instead he brought in a bosun, to assist with leadership and be OVER Nico.  Immediately Nico suddenly became a big supporter of the crew and began discussing with them his distaste for the new Boson, undermining him and being insubordinate.  Mistake!!

I see how EJ is kind of a goober (LOL), but I kind of like him and I think Nico is being bratty and also lazy.  He wants to be bosun but does things 1/2 assed.  That's not the going-above-and-beyond, 5 star service, way to getting promoted.

[Jobiska]

After our discussion on the prior episode of bosun v boatswain, I'm amused by the misspelling (same as on my cable) in the description of "boson."  Like any of these guys would understand a physics term...maybe next week it'll be "bison."

I was trying to figure out what the dark-haired guest was avoiding foodwise.  She had grouper instead of salmon, and on last week's episode she had a different protein also, but I can't remember what.  So it wasn't fish she was avoiding--maybe fatty fish specifically?  My dad doesn't eat salmon due to a strict gout diet.

I'm not a woo-hooer, but I hope I'd show more enthusiasm if I were on TV than these guests.  They just sat like lumps, even when they liked something!  When the one guy sort of waved his hands in the air in a desultory-plus-mechanical fashion, the other guy just stared right in front of him...  Well, I guess they liked the slide.

I was just starting to enjoy Chris' tossed off lines (like about renting his bilge accommodations out on AirB&B) but as I didn't really enjoy him standing around when he was supposed to be working, I won't miss him too much.

So has the scene shown in many previews, where the boat bumped so hard that galley drawers flew open, already been shown?  I slept through part of one show and I don't want to watch it all again On Demand where I can't fast forward through what I've seen.  I saw the spring-line related one but I didn't see the drawers scene happening during that debacle.

[dleighg]

9 hours ago, Jobiska said:

So has the scene shown in many previews, where the boat bumped so hard that galley drawers flew open, already been shown?  I slept through part of one show and I don't want to watch it all again On Demand where I can't fast forward through what I've seen.  I saw the spring-line related one but I didn't see the drawers scene happening during that debacle.

I don't think so, but could be mistaken.

[HunterHunted]

17 hours ago, Jobiska said:

I was trying to figure out what the dark-haired guest was avoiding foodwise.  She had grouper instead of salmon, and on last week's episode she had a different protein also, but I can't remember what.  So it wasn't fish she was avoiding--maybe fatty fish specifically?  My dad doesn't eat salmon due to a strict gout diet.

I have a friend who has a fish allergy, but it's super weird because she doesn't seem to have an allergy to anchovies or fatty fish. I suggested that she ask her doctor if she can eat fatty fish. She can. It's possible the dark haired guest has a fatty fish allergy. It's also possible the guest is full of it.