Darcey & Jesse: Cougar Town

[Former Nun]

On 9/24/2017 at 5:59 PM, Meowwww said:

Foreheads are supposed to be 4 fingers wide.  Lay your hand horizontally from eyes to hairline.  

A 5 head is 5 fingers wide aka unnaturally large

Jesse has been called a fivehead several times.  If that's the case, Darcey must win the sixhead contest.

[itsadryheat]

3 hours ago, Gigglepuff said:

She's headed into Danielle territory when she talks about how Jesse may affect her kids and how he's "practically their stepdad." She reeks of neediness and desperation. She's annoying as hell.

 

In more ways than one-omg that pouty face! So attractive pathetic.

[booboopbedoo]

8 hours ago, Drogo said:

But since she's been there, he's told her what to wear,  how much makeup to wear

Maybe that is what she likes- to be managed/commanded.

He wants to go to the USA and she will marry him and grant his wish.Have no idea what he sees in her but maybe she takes her teeth out and gumms him to death every night?

4 hours ago, Former Nun said:

A 5 head is 5 fingers wide aka unnaturally large

At least a 5 head and maybe even a 6 head. Tyra Banks is a 5 head.

7 hours ago, sasha206 said:

I do think that he was shocked by her appearance.

He was! She admitted the picture was at least 20 years old and she was much skinnier.

[AZChristian]

On 9/24/2017 at 1:50 PM, Toaster Strudel said:

Darcey was right! He's practically a stepfather.

Confession:  Until I saw this picture and one my grandson posted on Facebook today, I couldn't figure out why everyone was wearing t-shirts with backward writing on them.  Finally, the little light bulb went on, and I figured out they were taking selfies in a mirror.

May I present the first in my upcoming line of leisure wear?  I'm now a designer!!!

[magemaud]

Is Darcey's daughter wearing a Yale hoodie? 

[Former Nun]

2 hours ago, magemaud said:

Is Darcey's daughter wearing a Yale hoodie? 

No...it's ELAY ! !

5 hours ago, booboopbedoo said:

9 hours ago, Former Nun said:

A 5 head is 5 fingers wide aka unnaturally large

At least a 5 head and maybe even a 6 head. Tyra Banks is a 5 head.

The first line is NOT my quote (it's Meowwww's).  The second line is mine.   I think of the fivehead vertically, not horizontally.  It's difficult sometimes to post these "quote things" accurately...you need to grab both comments.

[Major Bigtime]

In that photo with her hair pulled back, Darcey is heading into ten-head territory! This must be from the filming of the reunion show, I guess? 

[katenm]

There's a saying, "after 40, it's Botox or bangs."  Darcey clearly made the wrong choice. 

 

As a woman of a certain age, it's sad (pathetic) that she doesn't grasp the concept of "the harder you try to look younger, the older you look."

[StayingAfterSunday]

37 minutes ago, katenm said:

There's a saying, "after 40, it's Botox or bangs."  Darcey clearly made the wrong choice. 

 

As a woman of a certain age, it's sad (pathetic) that she doesn't grasp the concept of "the harder you try to look younger, the older you look."

Oh, I love it!  And so true.

I've also observed two types of older "Cougars"  trying to keep their younger guy, and they are: 

The cougar who dumbs down in order to seem younger.  She will try to dress in a way that may seem inappropriate and unattractive in order to "look young."

She may say phrases and use words typically spoken by teens and young adults, and she will often pout (Darcie) and display "cutesy" or coquettish mannerisms often exhibited by much younger women. 

She might also find it awkward when in the company of her boy toy and/or his (younger) friends the topic of conversation concerns an event or news story that occurred at a time she can easily recall -  or at a time when her boy toy was just a small child or, worse, not yet born.  It strikes me as stressful, in a way, for a woman to be so conscious of herself, her appearance, and her words, in order to draw less attention to the age difference between herself and her "love."

But even sadder is:

The cougar who really is the developmental age of her boyfriend.  For these women it's just another day in the park (or bar) acting like 22-year-olds when they are, in fact, 42.  They're none the wiser as to how they may appear to others. It's just the way they "roll." And it sure seems a lot easier than the first type of cougar.

[Kat30]

She got drunk once and how he wants her to stop drinking altogether?  WTF?  Control much?

[PityFree]

 Darcy looks so much better without all that heavy eye make-up.  She really has absolutely gorgeous, flawless skin. That’s what she should be playing up — instead of all the other fake things she does to look younger.

[CoachWristletJen]

16 minutes ago, Kat30 said:

She got drunk once and how he wants her to stop drinking altogether?  WTF?  Control much?

She only promised because she was desperate to keep him. 

I'll bet she had a white wine spritzer on the plane home!

[Toaster Strudel]

I'm thinking she got drunk more than once and it wasn't shown.

[DamnGina]

Jesse is sooooooo HOT! If he likes woman in their early 40’s where can I line up?!

Darcy really does have nice skin, she looks good, and younger, without all that makeup on!!

What is this brand she has? Clothing? Name?

[AZChristian]

8 hours ago, DamnGina said:

Jesse is sooooooo HOT! If he likes woman in their early 40’s where can I line up?!

Darcy really does have nice skin, she looks good, and younger, without all that makeup on!!

What is this brand she has? Clothing? Name?

It's plastered all over the backs of the jackets they wear:  House of 11.  Clothing for young people - and Darcy.

[Ivanova]

With his forehead and his height, Jesse HAS TO go as Pennywise the Clown this Halloween.

[spankydoll]

Darcy's latest photo on Starcasm looks very good. I think that she listened to Jesse and all of the comments on line and took it down a notch 

[CofCinci]

18 minutes ago, spankydoll said:

Darcy's latest photo on Starcasm looks very good. I think that she listened to Jesse and all of the comments on line and took it down a notch 

It also looks like her chin and jawline were altered surgically.  

[ChiCricket]

29 minutes ago, spankydoll said:

Darcy's latest photo on Starcasm looks very good. I think that she listened to Jesse and all of the comments on line and took it down a notch 

She looks much better without the very long black hair, and that fact that she didn't trowel her makeup on.

[spankydoll]

22 minutes ago, ChiCricket said:

She looks much better without the very long black hair, and that fact that she didn't trowel her makeup on.

Thank you for posting that photo! I am staying at a hotel and the WiFi is pathetic. I think that she looks less filled and perhaps a few pounds lighter. 

[Chalby]

On 16 September, 2017 at 2:01 PM, BradandJanet said:

Looks like Jack White of the White Stripes. 

To be fair to this fellow, he didn't ask for any attention or media speculation. Even his hair makes sense if this is a pix from the early 90's (remember all the guys sporting that mushroom cut). He's probably nice enough, and harmless. Keep the focus on Darcey and Jesse. Now, with all the published text messages, there's no way the TV audience can act shocked or pretend they had no idea this was a business plan rather than romance.

On 20 August, 2017 at 6:20 PM, Awfarmington said:

Speaking of which, she wants to stay longer than that? I can tell she's totally missing her kids ? 

I thought her kids were in their 20's. They're not?

[Awfarmington]

27 minutes ago, Chalby said:

To be fair to this fellow, he didn't ask for any attention or media speculation. Even his hair makes sense if this is a pix from the early 90's (remember all the guys sporting that mushroom cut). He's probably nice enough, and harmless. Keep the focus on Darcey and Jesse. Now, with all the published text messages, there's no way the TV audience can act shocked or pretend they had no idea this was a business plan rather than romance.

I thought her kids were in their 20's. They're not?

They're both minors. 

[Chalby]

15 minutes ago, Awfarmington said:

They're both minors. 

That's just sad. She's too wrapped up in herself to parent anyone. I thought she had a daughter who had a child.

[7isBlue]

7 hours ago, CofCinci said:

It also looks like her chin and jawline were altered surgically.  

To me, it looks like she's lost a bunch of weight. 

She looks so much better with lighter hair and warmer makeup. 

[AZChristian]

Showed those before/after pictures to Mr. AZC (who pretends not to watch, but does).  He didn't realize that they were the same person!

[Quof]

Quote

To be fair to this fellow, he didn't ask for any attention or media speculation.

Sure he did. He did a reality show with his fame whore wife.  Even if he now looks back in regret. Just goes to show, nothing you put on television (or the internet) is ever truly gone.  Let that be a lesson to you, kids. 

[Major Bigtime]

(Moved to different thread)

Edited October 9, 2017 by Major Bigtime

[ALittleShelfish]

who is she reminding me of in that "now" picture?  Carmen Electra?  it's driving me crazy.  

[Major Bigtime]

The camera angle in the second photo makes her look slimmer in the face, but that’s only because she’s not making that ugly fishlips face she does constantly.

[Kairay]

Ha ha ha Jesse thought if he gave her the "promise ring" Darcey would stop talking about marriage. He just opened a new can of worms. I LOL'd when she asked if the wedding ring was going to be bigger.

[spankydoll]

2 hours ago, Kairay said:

Ha ha ha Jesse thought if he gave her the "promise ring" Darcey would stop talking about marriage. He just opened a new can of worms. I LOL'd when she asked if the wedding ring was going to be bigger.

It's clearly costume jewelry. He can afford a gigantic one of those. 

Darcy's logo on the jackets looks like "HELL"  

[booboopbedoo]

Being the evil woman I am - I laughed my head off when he gave her the ring.

Seriously Jessie, you went down on one knee to give her an Avon ring?

 

On a side note he is really annoying me with his stupid comments and all  the " Babe" crap.

[deedee2]

2 hours ago, booboopbedoo said:

Being the evil woman I am - I laughed my head off when he gave her the ring.

Seriously Jessie, you went down on one knee to give her an Avon ring?

 

That had to be a producer-driven stunt so TLC could get a week's worth of teasers out of the clip of Jesse getting on one knee.

This couple is probably the most baffling of the bunch for me. As someone up-thread said, maybe Jesse planned to do a complete makeover on Darcey in order to promote his brand, and eventually launch a career as mind-body-spirit personal trainer for rich older ladies. Bleh, watching them together makes me cringe, though.

[jujuebes]

At least they give me hope for a new sci-fi flick...
 

[Baltimore Betty]

I think Darcy should have suggested they get a drink to celebrate the fake diamond fake promise ring!

What do we think Jesse was promising with that ring?  Was he promising to continue filming? To continue to wear her logo sweatshirt? To pose for stupid glamour shot photos?

[jujuebes]

10 minutes ago, Baltimore Betty said:

I think Darcy should have suggested they get a drink to celebrate the fake diamond fake promise ring!

What do we think Jesse was promising with that ring?  Was he promising to continue filming? To continue to wear her logo sweatshirt? To pose for stupid glamour shot photos?

Was it just me or did that ring look exactly like the one Darcy got for herself?

[Baltimore Betty]

2 minutes ago, jujuebes said:

Was it just me or did that ring look exactly like the one Darcy got for herself?

I think hers was a faux canary diamond but still of the gumball machine variety.

[Major Bigtime]

Here it is!

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00BLROOWG/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_dp_t2_CCm5zb5D727AS

[Rocky Balloons]

What a terrible situation. The poor girl is just desperately trying to be youthful. Its a predicament she is in which she has asked for. Since he's 24 and shes 42, she feels compelled to compete with girls his age. Whether or not she is doing it consciously or not, she will always be in this situation. Dressing the way she does, adjusting her appearance to conform to trying to look young (hair extensions, eyelashes, tanning and lip and facial injections) which in reality is just adding to a look which is neither desirable or pretty. You have to feel sorry for this girl. She is so desperate that it is driving her to be something she isn't, and worse yet, driving him to demand she look a certain way, which she has no trouble in doing. She is doing whatever he wants to make him love her, which is a tall order for anybody. Its so sad that its pathetic. He is a controlling narcissist, who is asking too much of her. Asking her to be a specific vision in his mind, asking her to stop drinking, asking her not to wear makeup, controlling her every move. Why would she agree to go there for 6 weeks when she has children back at home? Who does this? What a terrible strain on any relationship, in particular when you dont know the person? Why would she consent to doing this, or worse yet, why would she agree to it? Is she irresponsible? Is she delusional? Is she desperate? Yes, yes and yes. Watching Darcy is like watching a car wreck. You know you don't want to see it, but yet you cannot tear your eyes away from the situation. Its not only intriguing but all of us as voyeurs, wish to see things when they are falling apart or they are in a state of desperation and a pathetic and terrible situation. This is what this whole thing is. Its terrible, its sad and its awful. I wonder how she feels.

[orangeiguana]

6 hours ago, booboopbedoo said:

all  the " Babe" crap.

Where did anyone get the idea that "Baby" or "Babe" are flattering terms. They're infantilizing. I always shut that shiz down at the first mention.

[Pachengala]

2 hours ago, Rocky Balloons said:

What a terrible situation. The poor girl is just desperately trying to be youthful. Its a predicament she is in which she has asked for. Since he's 24 and shes 42, she feels compelled to compete with girls his age. Whether or not she is doing it consciously or not, she will always be in this situation. Dressing the way she does, adjusting her appearance to conform to trying to look young (hair extensions, eyelashes, tanning and lip and facial injections) which in reality is just adding to a look which is neither desirable or pretty. You have to feel sorry for this girl. She is so desperate that it is driving her to be something she isn't, and worse yet, driving him to demand she look a certain way, which she has no trouble in doing. She is doing whatever he wants to make him love her, which is a tall order for anybody. Its so sad that its pathetic. He is a controlling narcissist, who is asking too much of her. Asking her to be a specific vision in his mind, asking her to stop drinking, asking her not to wear makeup, controlling her every move. Why would she agree to go there for 6 weeks when she has children back at home? Who does this? What a terrible strain on any relationship, in particular when you dont know the person? Why would she consent to doing this, or worse yet, why would she agree to it? Is she irresponsible? Is she delusional? Is she desperate? Yes, yes and yes. Watching Darcy is like watching a car wreck. You know you don't want to see it, but yet you cannot tear your eyes away from the situation. Its not only intriguing but all of us as voyeurs, wish to see things when they are falling apart or they are in a state of desperation and a pathetic and terrible situation. This is what this whole thing is. Its terrible, its sad and its awful. I wonder how she feels.

This is kind of where I'm at with Darcy; women are bombarded by and can internalize so many damaging messages in this patriarchal society; a huge one is that there's one correct way to age. This is how Darcey processes that message,  and in her eyes, she's probably in a lose-lose proposition--this or accepting she's getting older. However, I'd be way more worried about her if she were actually interested in having a life with Jesse; as it is, if she's designed this as all for camera time, then I have hope that she's a lot more canny than she seems. In any event, hopefully she isn't the fragile mess she appears to be. 

[Desert Rat]

8 hours ago, booboopbedoo said:

Being the evil woman I am - I laughed my head off when he gave her the ring.

Seriously Jessie, you went down on one knee to give her an Avon ring?

 

On a side note he is really annoying me with his stupid comments and all  the " Babe" crap.

What's so funny?  It was "a historic moment."

It was historic alright.  One of the most ridiculous scenes in 90 day history.

[seacliffsal]

And such an unromantic location for a non-proposal.  What about being outside looking at the beautiful windmills and scenery?  Not only that, but people were actually walking past them while he was on his knee asking her to not be his wife.  Priceless all the way around!

[StayingAfterSunday]

Jesse exuded such enthusiasm in this last episode, like a newly-released prisoner.  He was overjoyed to be sending her back to the States!

[Kelly]

20 hours ago, seacliffsal said:

And such an unromantic location for a non-proposal.  What about being outside looking at the beautiful windmills and scenery?  Not only that, but people were actually walking past them while he was on his knee asking her to not be his wife.  Priceless all the way around!

I loved it.  I think they're both insufferable.  They deserve each other.

[Arwen Evenstar]

19 hours ago, StayingAfterSunday said:

Jesse exuded such enthusiasm in this last episode, like a newly-released prisoner.  He was overjoyed to be sending her back to the States!

Now, he can have the whole shelf for his panties once again.

[Arwen Evenstar]

Just in case anyone wanted to be reminded of glowing balls

 

[tilt-a-whirl]

On 10/20/2017 at 9:41 PM, Arwen Evenstar said:

Just in case anyone wanted to be reminded of glowing balls

LOL  Do we have to guess who has blue balls? What's the prize? A huge white ball cap from Larry, book of matches from Pole, gay porno starring Antonio, panties from Sean, smelly socks from PatricK? I don't think I want to play.

Edited October 22, 2017 by tilt-a-whirl
Oops, forgot Patreek.

[Quof]

I'm shocked that everyone is taking the "Not a Proposal" seriously.   That was totally scripted, just like the rest of this "relationship."

[MrSmith]

On 9/24/2017 at 4:01 PM, Irish Springs said:

I think he was photoshopped into the pic!

It's possible, but I don't think so. It would have required putting the parts of the image that are in the foreground (overlapping Jesse) into their own layer, then inserting Jesse in a layer between the original image and the layer created to be the foreground. There would be background to remove from the foreground layer. That would mean editing around Darcey's and her one daughter's hair. Those small hairs that are sticking up off Darcey's ponytail  are hard not to screw up. The edge around her daughter's hair that is just in front of Jesse's bicep still looks soft and natural, and that is an area they definitely would have had to retouch no matter how large a section of the picture they took to turn into the foreground layer. Also, the lighting and shadows on him and his shirt look correct, as well. (That room looks lit by pot lights in the ceiling.)

On 9/24/2017 at 6:08 PM, PityFree said:

Wow. Darcy has quite a five head in that pic. She does look better with lighter hair and a less harsh style (vs a stick straight, waist length, black, center parted Cher-do).

She needs to start using ladies Rogaine. She looks like she's got a receding hairline.