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S13.E08: Cooking Goes Live!


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5 hours ago, MajorWoody said:

Finally, Honeychile Goober Hayseed. If he had ever toned down that act, he would be one of the best and most natural contestants on this entire series. He has some decent skills, he is certainly comfortable in front of the camera, and he is somewhat informative. Yet everytime he comes on, with his over the top cliches, sayings, and accent, I want to throw a roadkill possum at him. Also, when I was young we had a two word name for that goofy semi facial hair he has, and it is not nice. Everytime I see it it reminds me of that insult.  I think when he ends up as an eventual judge in GGG, we might actually yearn for the return of some of the other judges we constantly complain about. 

 

Reading this at my desk and trying not to lose my shit... this is hysterical. I also could not agree more. He is so over the top. I'm just hoping he doesn't win, but then again there isn't a better alternative. 

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(edited)

I'm always fascinated by the way people like Cory can be perfectly interesting and coherent during the confessionals and be neither of those two things when "on camera" on camera. It's the old "I can be myself" because this camera doesn't count. 

I had absolutely no problem with him being eliminated this week. He was genuinely bad and none of the other's were even close. If it weren't for the hand washing thing, I'm not sure what kind of issue they would have needed to invent to come up with a legitimate second worst performance.

I mean, I could do so with no problem. I'd just bend it slightly to "Okay, Cory was the worst performance and all the rest were kind of the same. Who is the least likable of the bunch?" I think that would have been a far more interesting discussion. Do we eliminate the great chef, who is also handsome but needs to work on his camera skills, or do we keep him and eliminate the guy who would just annoy/anger viewers when we trot him out on camera?

Edited by JTMacc99
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14 minutes ago, chenoa333 said:

I don't get the opportunity to watch this show on a weekly basis. Is Matthew still one of the final contestants? I'm hoping not.

Lucky you!

Unfortunately, the answer to your question is "yes".  But we all have high hopes to see him pout on his way out the door, soon!

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(edited)

Still a little stunned that Amy wasn't sent home for the chicken incident.  I am completely unable to handle raw chicken with bare hands and always keep a large supply of disposable gloves in my kitchen.  I suppose the pressure of the challenge could make you forget to wash but it horrified me watching her handle fresh ingredients after the chicken.  That would be unforgivable on Top Chef and she would be gone.

Despising Matthew has been the theme of this show for me but I'm officially adding Jason to that.  Enough with the corn pone act.  My daddy was a southerner and could whip out the funny phrases with the best of them, but he used them very sparingly and cleverly.

I have no clue who will win and really don't care.  I can just say that will probably be Matthew or Jason, neither of whom I will watch.

Giada, for the love, please put them away.

Edited by limecoke
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On 7/24/2017 at 6:46 PM, Madding crowd said:

I really wish they could have actually shown Cory what they were looking for-maybe provide an example of someone cooking on a live stream and then give him another chance. Honestly, he is the only one who appeals to me of that group.

Maybe it's just my memory, but it feels like they get a lot less instruction this season than in the past. It used to be that the show would teach them how to present, and they didn't need to start with a polished professional patter if they could learn it. Now they get thrown in blind and maybe learn something from 2 sentences of judging, if they survive?

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9 minutes ago, Amarsir said:

Maybe it's just my memory, but it feels like they get a lot less instruction this season than in the past.

You're right. But the show lost its mentor when Alton left.

It's funny, you can almost see Rusty thinking "High energy level. . . keep that energy up. . . " whenever he is about to make a presentation. Because he assaults the viewer with his intro sentences. "HEY EVERYBODY I'M. . ."

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2 hours ago, Blonde Gator said:

Lucky you!

Unfortunately, the answer to your question is "yes".  But we all have high hopes to see him pout on his way out the door, soon!

 Thanks for the info BlondeGator. I used to love this show but now I don't even care that I can't watch every weekly episode. Why are all the contestants goofy and over the top? It's a cooking show for christ sake.  There MUST be another Julia Childs somewhere on the planet who is 100% real and can cook. Enough with all the judges advice on "telling a story, smiling alot, proper amount of enthusiasm, and blah blah blah".  If I was a good cook I would love to be a contestant on this show just so I could tell the judge with a thousand teeth to f*ck off!

Edited by chenoa333
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10 hours ago, MajorWoody said:

Finally, Honeychile Goober Hayseed. If he had ever toned down that act, he would be one of the best and most natural contestants on this entire series. He has some decent skills, he is certainly comfortable in front of the camera, and he is somewhat informative. Yet everytime he comes on, with his over the top cliches, sayings, and accent, I want to throw a roadkill possum at him.

What his accent and speech pattern reminds me of (and this is an obscure reference) is the little southern girl on the old Shake'n'Bake commercials who said "And I helped."

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Ha! Ha! Ha! I remember those commercials.

I think what would finally drive me away from FN for good would be a tandem show starting Jason and Damaris Phillips called, "My Old Kentucky Home (Cooking.)"

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(edited)
55 minutes ago, bluepiano said:

What his accent and speech pattern reminds me of (and this is an obscure reference) is the little southern girl on the old Shake'n'Bake commercials who said "And I helped."

I love the obscure.  I remember the little kid:  "Ayn Ah hepped!".

Do they still market Shake'n'Bake?

ETA:  I knew Kraft wouldn't disappoint with their Better Living Through Chemistry (qv Kraft Macaroni Dinner).  They have about a thousand varieties of SnB on Amazon.

Edited by spiderpig
Shake'n'Bake!
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1 minute ago, spiderpig said:

I love the obscure.  I remember the little kid:  "Ayn Ah hepped!".

Do they still market Shake'n'Bake?

Reminds me of a stop we once made on a road trip.  "Haaah!  Ya'll want sum swaaaate taaaay?"  I'm sure if Honey Goober reads this, he'll say it on air like he thought it up.

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5 hours ago, cooksdelight said:

If Jason ever whips out "It's as tight as Jack's hatband" I'm done.

In my house it was "Dick's hatband" :)

 

2 hours ago, spiderpig said:

I love the obscure.  I remember the little kid:  "Ayn Ah hepped!".

I remember it more as "Ayn Ah hailped!"

(This is apparently my "throwing in my 2 cents on obscure Southern references post).

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10 hours ago, bluepiano said:

What his accent and speech pattern reminds me of (and this is an obscure reference) is the little southern girl on the old Shake'n'Bake commercials who said "And I helped."

LOL, I still use that phrase now and then. I just could not watch or listen to Jason on a regular basis. I can't take him seriously as a "food authority" or whatever it is they are looking for. Each week, I wait for the circus music to start playing when they are all scrambling.

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(edited)

What's the world coming to?  Giada does a near strip tease and leans forward to make sure that all of the boys got a good look at her girls.  Amy gets out there and does a good presentation.  She picks up several pieces of chicken, doesn't wash her hands, and the judges can't eat it.   She still stays on the show.  Cory, who admittedly was nervous, completes his dish, is told by Giada that it tastes good after scarfing some down, but is ill at ease during his presentation, and Cory is eliminated???  I see something wrong with this picture.  How many times did AMY screw up her presentations?  Is something wrong with this picture?  I smell a rat.  I honestly hate to be a sore loser, and I'm trying not to be, but even my husband wondered why Cory over Amy.

I can't imagine that Matthew could win this thing after his coq au vin admission right in front of the judges.  He showed how lacking in knowledge he is.  All he is really good for is that sneer.

Edited by Lura
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20 minutes ago, Lura said:

I see something wrong with this picture.  How many times did AMY screw up her presentations?  Is something wrong with this picture?  I smell a rat.

I think they want Cory to be the comeback kid who wins it all. Much like Brooke on Top Chef.

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(edited)

Wasn't expecting Cory to get sent home. I hope he makes it back through Star Salvation.

@Lura, I think you meant Amy, not Addie. Addie is gone. For good. Besides, that chicken Amy handled was enough to make the judges sick if they would've tasted it!

These folks booked me a room at the Holiday Inn Express I was staying at Monday to Wednesday.

Can I share you guys something for real? Amy is the only one left out of these finalists, because Cory got sent home for acting like me in the presentation. I'm nervous all the time. Probably because of my autism, but I would let Adderall Addie save the day, as she seems more to me like a developmental behavioral pediatrician than a chef. And she is bland.

P.S: Addie looks like Valentina Lisitsa.

Edited by Hotel Diva
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Amy is a military wife.  AFAIK, military families around the world can watch FN, and Amy may appeal to them.  I think TPTB may be misjudging though, as I am from a military family and those that have traveled around the world have the most adventurous palates imaginable.

Hmmm. If FN wants to do another road trip food type show, (and yes of course they do), doing one near military bases both here and overseas wouldn't be the stupidest idea ever.  

I'm a brat myself, and we lived in the Midwest,  South, and  West, along with Germany. All those places had some interesting and specific things to eat.  And there are bases all over the country and world. 

But dear god, not Guy to host. Please.  Sunny Anderson might make sense as she's got bona fides but she'd have to tone down a bit.

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Raw chicken and the handling of it makes me gag, but I wear disposable gloves when I prepare it.  And I wash down my whole kitchen after I deal with the prep!  Once it's cooked, I do like to eat chicken.  I don't remember exactly what Amy made for Bobby & Boobies with her filthy, diseased, contaminated, unwashed, infectious chicken hands (insert eye roll here), but wouldn't the heat from cooking the chicken to the proper temp, eliminate the risk of potential Food Network Elite killing germs from Amy's dish, and thus allow the judges to taste it?  It wasn't as if Amy served up chicken tartare or asked either of them to lick the cutting board for chrissake.

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I'll defer to people with more knowledge than I have about chicken and germs, but I felt that the judges were being a little bit too careful in daring not to take a bite.  Again, I don't know.  Also, we have to keep in mind that the FN is picky about all chefs' handling of chicken, so the judges pretty much had to stick to the network policy.

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1 hour ago, BusyOctober said:

Raw chicken and the handling of it makes me gag, but I wear disposable gloves when I prepare it.  And I wash down my whole kitchen after I deal with the prep!  Once it's cooked, I do like to eat chicken.  I don't remember exactly what Amy made for Bobby & Boobies with her filthy, diseased, contaminated, unwashed, infectious chicken hands (insert eye roll here), but wouldn't the heat from cooking the chicken to the proper temp, eliminate the risk of potential Food Network Elite killing germs from Amy's dish, and thus allow the judges to taste it?  It wasn't as if Amy served up chicken tartare or asked either of them to lick the cutting board for chrissake.

It wasn't the chicken itself that they were concerned about. It was cross-contamination. If your hands or knife are contaminated from raw chicken, then touch tomatoes that are to be eaten uncooked, it's very comparable to licking the cutting board.

And she did flip the cutting board for exactly that reason, but just went blank on her hands and the knife. While in one sense any of us can forget, it's the sort of thing that should be really habitual.

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On ‎07‎/‎24‎/‎2017 at 2:30 AM, Christina said:

ETA: I forgot to mention Giada pronouncing spaghetti and meatballs in American and not Italian. She has been given a lot of flack over the years for insisting on a pronounciation used in the region of Italy she came from instead of the dialect here, and it often sounded stupid. Another chef once pointed out to her that in the region of Italy from which he hailed, it was pronounced differently, and I remember the grin dropping from her face. It wasn't on this show, but on a talk show, I think, and she was trying to correct a young chef who was helping her with her presentation. I howled with laughter because it is so true. I'm wondering if this time it was a nod to the viewers, and Alton, who found her ridiculous.

I have no problem with Giada pronouncing things in her dialect anymore than I when Jacques Pepin or Ludo Lefebvre pronounces things with a French accent, or José Andrés with a Spanish accent or Aaron Sanchez with a Latin American accent.  Or for that matter, my husband, for whom Italian is his first language.  He always pronounces ricotta, mascarpone, parmigiano and other foods with an Italian accent.  Italian is her first language.  She was born there and it was spoken in her home.  I'd rather not hear an beautiful Italian dishes and ingredients, or French dishes for that matter, slaughtered by American accents.   

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On ‎07‎/‎24‎/‎2017 at 7:56 AM, spiderpig said:

If we have to look at Giada's girls every week, I want to see Bobby in a Speedo.

What have we ever done to you?????

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2 hours ago, Amarsir said:

It wasn't the chicken itself that they were concerned about. It was cross-contamination. If your hands or knife are contaminated from raw chicken, then touch tomatoes that are to be eaten uncooked, it's very comparable to licking the cutting board.

And she did flip the cutting board for exactly that reason, but just went blank on her hands and the knife. While in one sense any of us can forget, it's the sort of thing that should be really habitual.

And there I was thinking  it was just a reason for Gilda to not even pretend to eat.

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On 7/26/2017 at 2:30 PM, srpturtle80 said:

Reading this at my desk and trying not to lose my shit... this is hysterical. I also could not agree more. He is so over the top. I'm just hoping he doesn't win, but then again there isn't a better alternative. 

This!   He probably will win, but something about him reminds me of was it Lenny? the guy that won and no one heard from again.  I know plenty of people from that south that use a lot of sayings, but not in EVERY word or sentence.  

Well, my mother always taught me to wash my hands after handling meat and she was no food authority. I cannot believe that she stayed after that.  Cory, however, has been bland to me the whole season.   Oh my god, this is correct....there is no one else besides Jason for the win...depending on who comes out of Salvation. 

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I think Giada's choice is Jason.  I noticed during his presentation that she was grinning from wisdom teeth to wisdom teeth.  Then, per usual, she looked at Bobby to see what his reaction was.  Bobby was wearing his poker face.  If Bobby and Giada disagree on a winner, I think Giada will go with Bobby's choice.

Some people are calling Cory "handsome."  I think he is, too.  I was surprised then, when I visited his website, to see a smiling picture of him without his beard and mustache.  He looks very different and not what I would call handsome.  I love Cory and am not putting him down, but I was surprised to see his looks without the facial hair.

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As you can see, I'm really disappointed in this season. This is not Food Network Star! It's more like Food Network Party-All-You-Want-Star. I'm sorry, but I don't see an actual star in this group of people at all, not even Jason. He may be funny and entertaining, but his cooking skills don't really impress me. Addie The Jazz Pianist was smug and bugged me, but I figured she would make it to the finals because she is a young Martha, a young Daniel. (Addie the Jazz Pianist was a nickname that I got from this lady that plays piano, if she ever retired, the replacement could be Addie: http://www.valentinalisitsa.com/) Heck, she could be the modern Dave Brubeck if she would play jazz piano. Cory was probably the most talented chef in the competition, so I hope he comes back through Comeback Kitchen, but for some reason I don't see him being the next food star either. Amy The Damaris From Hawaii is definitely not the next food network star, and I can see it in my eyes. David "Big Swole" or whatever his name is, is not material for this show at all, although I can see him having a sense of humor. I predict Jason will win this whole thing, because the person who comes back through Comeback Kitchen isn't usually the next FNS.

The fan loser, Matthew, came through Comeback Kitchen, so, I would do 3 of the following: a) meet him in real life, b) chat with him on Skype, or c) say You gon' get eliminated soon (in a Jason accent). He is the evil one, the evil Balthazar Bratt himself. Imagine being stuck in a plane seat with him sitting next to you, not knowing when you'd get out. It'd be scary, ain't it?

Oh, and boobs, boobs, boobs! I didn't forget about that. I'm betting Giada could be replaced by Valentina Lisitsa 2.0.

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With all of the old TV shows being rebooted, Jason doesn't need to worry if he loses on FNS. He's a shoo-in for the new Gomer Pyle on "The New Andy Griffith Show."

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Language is fluid. If Giada is speaking Italian, of course she should pronounce the words correctly. But when she is speaking in an American accent and changes a single word to the pronunciation used in a region of Italy, a place she is not, and corrects other to speak like they are in that region of Italy, she sounds stupid and ignorant. It's not even spoken with the same pronunciation throughout the country of Italy. It was also rude of her to tell the other chef that he was pronouncing it wrong, if he was speaking from his region of Italy, because it wasn't the way she thought it should be spoken. She used to correct Alton all the time, and he started responding with witty comebacks.

The butchery of mascarpone, for example, gets no leeway because it is spelled and pronounced one way correctly but often butchered; it's not an accent issue. If someone has an accent I wouldn't expect them to speak American words in an American accent, but maybe that's because I'm a military brat who has been enough places to know that language is fluid and some people have accents. Giada does not, unless she wants to for a specific word. 

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18 hours ago, Christina said:

Language is fluid. If Giada is speaking Italian, of course she should pronounce the words correctly. But when she is speaking in an American accent and changes a single word to the pronunciation used in a region of Italy, a place she is not, and corrects other to speak like they are in that region of Italy, she sounds stupid and ignorant. It's not even spoken with the same pronunciation throughout the country of Italy. It was also rude of her to tell the other chef that he was pronouncing it wrong, if he was speaking from his region of Italy, because it wasn't the way she thought it should be spoken. She used to correct Alton all the time, and he started responding with witty comebacks.

The butchery of mascarpone, for example, gets no leeway because it is spelled and pronounced one way correctly but often butchered; it's not an accent issue. If someone has an accent I wouldn't expect them to speak American words in an American accent, but maybe that's because I'm a military brat who has been enough places to know that language is fluid and some people have accents. Giada does not, unless she wants to for a specific word. 

Christina, I appreciate this smart, incisive commentary.  You're right on!

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On 7/28/2017 at 6:04 PM, Christina said:

Language is fluid. If Giada is speaking Italian, of course she should pronounce the words correctly. But when she is speaking in an American accent and changes a single word to the pronunciation used in a region of Italy, a place she is not, and corrects other to speak like they are in that region of Italy, she sounds stupid and ignorant.

Yes.  I don't actually mind when she pronounces an Italian word with an Italian pronunciation even if she's speaking American when she does it.  I see people who speak Spanish do that too whenever they come across a word that just sound better to them pronounced "correctly."  But to correct someone else?  Oh so wrong. Except when it comes to pointing out that Bongiorno does not sound French. 

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On 7/28/2017 at 11:04 AM, J-Man said:

With all of the old TV shows being rebooted, Jason doesn't need to worry if he loses on FNS. He's a shoo-in for the new Gomer Pyle on "The New Andy Griffith Show."

If not there,then any network has to be developing a sitcom set in a town with the "quirky"characters and such..Jason would be perfect for it.

Could even give his character a catchphrse that winds up becoming a internet meme too

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8 hours ago, TDT said:

If not there,then any network has to be developing a sitcom set in a town with the "quirky"characters and such..Jason would be perfect for it.

Could even give his character a catchphrse that winds up becoming a internet meme too

I'm thinking a reboot of Alice, (old show staring Linda Lavin as a waitress in a diner) Jason would be the Flo character. I can totally hear him saying "well kiss my grits" when someone complains about their order. Bonus points if they put him in a big blonde beehive wig. lol

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I was just curious enough about Matthew to google a bit.  He USED to live in Scottsdale (the expensive part of Phoenix), and was sous chef at a high-end restaurant.  He is now corporate executive chef for Nestle Professional in Cleveland.  So when Bobby jumped on his "broke guy cooking" line as a theme for a show, it was a fake concept.  I know that everyone comes in with a "story" of themselves they want to sell, but this guy is so fake that it's distracting.

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Speaking of Matthew i couldve sworn i saw him in the extended promo for I Hart Food(Hannah Hart's upcoming show..)..i think he was the one whom she was asking if there was some kind of pepper in a dish she was eating

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I forgot to mention, I finally got around to noticing Bobby's eyebrows. (I'm easily distracted by boobs.) 

You guys were right. There's something weird going on there. If he's not careful, they are going to migrate down to his eyelids.

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