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S02.E11: The Dubrovnik Wedgie


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When bad weather keeps Sirocco at port, the crew scrambles to keep a VIP charter broker and her friends happy. Wes announces his choice for lead deckhand, causing tension to erupt. Despite their differences, Hannah and Bugsy attempt to work peacefully alongside each other. Meanwhile, word gets out that Wes and Malia exchanged a kiss during anchor watch leaving their crew mates outraged about crossing professional boundaries. And frustrated by watching the romance grow between Malia and Wes, a heartbroken Adam reveals to Bugs that he and Malia have a secret past.  Finally, on the crew’s day off in the historical city of Dubrovnik, Adam pulls a prank on Wes that goes a little too far for Wes’ liking. 

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(edited)

Every guest and every meal should absolutely receive that level of service from Adam.  This just highlights early a lazy shitbag he is. 

OMG, Wes is stupid and Malia gives all female deckhands a bad name.  I served on the Navy in Boats and Cranes during a WesPac and she is the foul kind of female, a person who uses her sexuality for advancement and favors, that give all women sailors a bad name. She's a twit. Replace the I with an a. 

Edited by ShawnaLanne
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(edited)

And so the drama begins when the gossip flies in another direction! What's good for the goose is good for the gander! I love it that even though Malia may have earned her elevation, "playing" with everyone on the ship had to come back to bite her! Adam will lose his mind when he finds out about Wes' make out session on watch with Malia! Lauren just blabbed; can't help herself! She's such a $#!t-stirrer! The way she "rats out" the guys is also so sick! It's like a detached purveyor of news! B!tch! ;-)

Update: Now FUGS is playing Doctor Laura! OMG, what is with these people? ;-)

Edited by Avon.Blakes7
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2 minutes ago, Avon.Blakes7 said:

And so the drama begins when the gossip flies in another direction! What's good for the goose is good for the gander! I love it that even though Malia may have earned her elevation, "playing" with everyone on the ship had to come back to bite her! Adam will lose his mind when he finds out about Wes' make out session on watch with Malia! Lauren just blabbed; can't help herself! She's such a $#!t-stirrer! The way she "rats out" the guys is also so sick! It's like a detached purveyor of news! B!tch! ;-(

I will say I'm happy there are cameras around because Adam seems unhinged. 

Ooh. It looks like Adam is going to "jokingly" get physical. 

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I wish sandy had gotten rid of Adam when she had the chance. He has been an ass sober, and now more so drunk

Malia was wrong playing with hearts. I doubt bobby did that much extra around the boat. I don't really believe Malia did either. I really don't know which person earned the job

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All right I'm going crazy -- the guest who left early, Samantha, was on some other reality show about up and coming realtors. She's in South Florida. On that show I think she carted a dog around and called her dad for advice a lot. She was kind of a dud as she was on this show. Who can name the other show? 

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11 minutes ago, Hagosaurus said:

Malia, it's not impossible for you to work your ass off and earn the title  [sr. Deckhand] because you're a cute and attractive female deckhand. But it will be impossible for you to convince your co-workers that you earned the promotion based on merit because YOU decided to hook up with your boss. The promotion doesn't feel so good when no one thinks you've earned it and you've lost credit for the any hard work you may have put in. You've made your bed beyotch now take your lumps.

...and this is the same person that so agreed with everyone else about Hannah being "unprofessional!" Hilariously hypocritical of all concerned! ;-)

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12 minutes ago, tinaw said:

I doubt bobby did that much extra around the boat. I don't really believe Malia did either. I really don't know which person earned the job

Hmmm.... Don't forget that Bobs lost the anchor about the first charter. It is very easy to believe that Malia having worked on dive boats is more experienced than Bobs.

Also, I don't see how it is possible for Bobs to be a captain when he can't even do math in his head. I would think that would make docking a boat in wind and current rather difficult.

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4 minutes ago, Belowdeckchatter said:

Hmmm.... Don't forget that Bobs lost the anchor about the first charter. It is very easy to believe that Malia having worked on dive boats is more experienced than Bobs.

Also, I don't see how it is possible for Bobs to be a captain when he can't even do math in his head. I would think that would make docking a boat in wind and current rather difficult.

Was it officially bobs fault though? Malia was on anchor watch. That we saw. I know  Bob didn't do well getting boat out of port. Neither did Malia.

I still don't know who's better for the job

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9 minutes ago, escapetoreality said:

Wait I solved it. Million Dollar Listing Miami. Samantha DiBianchi. Her dad is an attorney I know. 

I never watched that show but from what I saw tonight she seems like a spoiled brat.

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7 minutes ago, tinaw said:

Was it officially bobs fault though? Malia was on anchor watch. That we saw. I know  Bob didn't do well getting boat out of port. Neither did Malia.

I still don't know who's better for the job

Those were two different issues so neither were stellar.

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Well, as usual, I'm at the end of the season and can't root for anyone. Malia, you kept saying you shouldn't get involved with your boss & yet you went right ahead and did it. Wes, in your long career ( you're like 30) you've never been involved with a crew member, well, bully for you! How many cute female deckhands have you worked with? Bobby, you don't automatically get promoted because you quit your other job and its your second cruise. Lauren - stirring much shit?  Adam, you are too old for Malia and you aren't a very nice person anyway, just cook.  Captain Sandy seems clueless about her crew. "We're starting to work as a great team!"  And by the way, shouldn't she have been making assessments of how well the crew was performing - she micro manages everything else.

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1 hour ago, escapetoreality said:

All right I'm going crazy -- the guest who left early, Samantha, was on some other reality show about up and coming realtors. She's in South Florida. On that show I think she carted a dog around and called her dad for advice a lot. She was kind of a dud as she was on this show. Who can name the other show? 

 

1 hour ago, escapetoreality said:

Wait I solved it. Million Dollar Listing Miami. Samantha DiBianchi. Her dad is an attorney I know. 

I think you may well be correct.  Nice catch.

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(edited)

Malia-they aren't questioning your promotion because they think you haven't earned it because you are a pretty girl! They are questioning it because you are/were hooking up with your boss!

 

If only Bobby wasn't such a dick, though...ugh. He makes it hard to agree with him even one small iota, but I do think he has a valid point in that he and Max didn't get as much face one with Wes because Wes was too busy trailing after Malia. Doesn't mean he's owed the promotion, at all, and certainly not because he quit his full time job to be on the show. 

 

Adam is a stage 5 clinger, but if it's true that she was texting him and making plans all while hooking up with Wes...that shit's not right.

Edited by Suck It Trebek
Punctuation counts!
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(edited)
23 minutes ago, Suck It Trebek said:

Adam is a stage 5 clinger, but if it's true that she was texting him and making plans all while hooking up with Wes...that shit's not right.

I missed the part about the texts. So that is what they were about? Malia texting Adam about hooking up somewhere down the line while she was hooking up with Wes? I do not think Adam's actions were at all right, but if that was the case I would be irritated as well. Of course I would not do what Adam did even if I was pissed. I hope Wes does find out about the texts and the Adam/Malia pre-show hook ups then. It would be nice if they both realized Malia was playing them.

When Wes said he hadn't hooked up with a deckhand before, I wondered how many female deckhands he has worked with.

Edited by Misslindsey
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1 hour ago, Sai said:

I never watched that show but from what I saw tonight she seems like a spoiled brat.

I knew I remembered her from somewhere. Didn't like her on MDLM, really didn't like her on this.

 

Yeah Wes you've never hooked up with a deckhand in all of your years?? 

Wow Malia texting Adam like that and then acting like he's crazy- she's gaslighting him!

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(edited)
1 hour ago, biakbiak said:

Wes is 25, Malia is 26, I have no idea how old Adam is claiming.

Based on her behavior I thought Malia was 19 or 20. She is too old to be pulling that shit. 

I'm not a man and skew pretty hard hetro on the Kinsey scale,  so I  don't get it. She's pretty,  but not any more attractive than the other women, except for Fuggs, on the boat. Is it pheremones? Does she look that much better in person? I don't see it. Her Jenny McCarthy bit, the I'm hot and like fart jokes thing? 

50 minutes ago, Misslindsey said:

I missed the part about the texts. So that is what they were about? Malia texting Adam about hooking up somewhere down the line while she was hooking up with Wes? I do not think Adam's actions were at all right, but if that was the case I would be irritated as well. Of course I would not do what Adam did even if I was pissed. I hope Wes does find out about the texts and the Adam/Malia pre-show hook ups then. It would be nice if they both realized Malia was playing them.

When Wes said he hadn't hooked up with a deckhand before, I wondered how many female deckhands he has worked with.

I agree. Still if that was the case he has no reason to be mad at Wes. He didn't know. He's just jumping on the opportunity to be an ass because Wes hooked up with a subordinate and then promoted her. 

Edited by ShawnaLanne
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1 minute ago, biakbiak said:

Also, she has talked about hooking up with both Bobby and Ben so what the hell is she talking about?

There is a picture of Lauren in the dictionary next to the definition of messy. She's hooked up with Bobby and Ben and thrown it back in Bobby's face. She was needlessly vague in that fight she exacerbated between Bobby and Hannah. And she's been going around to nearly every crew member to gossip about Wes and Malia, but you ain't heard it from her.

Lauren can't kiss and tell because she can't stop gossiping long enough to get kissed.

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(edited)

"This literally has nothing to do with your looks.  You are making out with your boss."  -- Max 

And Max remains my favorite.

Malia, this is why you don't shit where you eat.  I dealt with something similar once.  There was a girl in another department that had all kinds of drama going on.  She'd dated and or slept with several guys in the office.  Somehow scandalous pictures of her got forwarded around one of the departments in relation to it (I never saw them, just heard about it).  One of the guys she was involved with was married and his wife kept calling the office. She wore inappropriate attire to work.  There were outbursts and tears and altercations and fleeing the office. Seriously, just all kinds of drama.  All of my employees were guys and she'd started flirting with some of them, but as far as I know none of them were ever involved with her.   When we had an opening in our department she wanted to transfer and I blocked it.  I didn't want her and her drama in my department and I didn't want to manage someone that was so messy at work.  A keystone of my departmental rules is "don't do stupid shit that makes it so I have to deal with HR," and it was obvious if she worked for me I'd spend a lot of time dealing with HR.  She tried to play it like she got black balled for being a cute female, but it was 100% her messiness.  I guess it's kind of the opposite of Malia because this girl's office shenanigans held her back.

The charter guests getting bored with the tour guide reminded me of my dad.  

Edited by yourmomiseasy
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2 hours ago, Misslindsey said:

I missed the part about the texts. So that is what they were about? Malia texting Adam about hooking up somewhere down the line while she was hooking up with Wes? I do not think Adam's actions were at all right, but if that was the case I would be irritated as well. Of course I would not do what Adam did even if I was pissed. I hope Wes does find out about the texts and the Adam/Malia pre-show hook ups then. It would be nice if they both realized Malia was playing them.

When Wes said he hadn't hooked up with a deckhand before, I wondered how many female deckhands he has worked with.

I thought Hannah said he had never hooked up with anyone on charter, unless she was mistaken. To be fair, that's a pretty impressive feat compared to this bunch of miscreants. But then again he's been yachting for maybe 4 years and he broke his cardinal rule with Malia, of all people. At least Hannah, dumb as it was, hooked up with a hottie mcmillionaire.

Oh Bobby, he almost has a point, but he's so annoying I don't even care. Wes is adorable but too young and too dumb to run the exterior. Someone promote Max already! 

Adam makes me sick! He is exactly why the whole world finds Americans obnoxious. He is:

parks-and-recreation-Jean-Ralphio-the-wo

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I realize that, among all the stellar displays of professionalism and decorum on this episode, this may have been overlooked, but I did love to see Bugs' focus on the security cam. So diligent! So attentive to detail! So intent on remaining a professional attitude!

I was so annoyed with some of the guests' attitudes towards the weather issues. It's natural to feel disappointed if the weather forces you to cancel your (expensive) plans, then

Wes and Malia made me ill. I can't stand favoritism and I can't stand people who play others to get what they want, and then deny they're doing anything wrong. As Kathryn Dennis of Southern Charm might say, "Dis-gust-in'."

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Wow, I thought Malia was like 20 or 21 with the way she was acting. There is no excuse for acting like that at 26. Hell, I was more grown up than Malia when I was 21. I can't believe she wasn't getting it that the guys weren't upset that she got the position because she was pretty but because she was making out with Wes. Bobby had spent the entire season complaining that he wasn't getting any time in with Wes because he was too busy with Malia. That lack of time between Wes and Bobby probably directly impacted Bobby not getting the position. Of course Malia is going to improve faster and show more initiative when she is the one getting all of your attention. 

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I was surprised to see Hannah and Bugsy all close up and friendly on their shore leave. I thought there was animosity between them due to the Hannah/Jason incident and Bugsy not agreeing with how Hannah was running her dept. LOL they were probably just relieved that the focus was on the men and they could just unwind without cameras in their faces as much! 

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4 hours ago, rho said:

I thought Hannah said he had never hooked up with anyone on charter, unless she was mistaken. To be fair, that's a pretty impressive feat compared to this bunch of miscreants. But then again he's been yachting for maybe 4 years and he broke his cardinal rule with Malia, of all people. At least Hannah, dumb as it was, hooked up with a hottie mcmillionaire.

Oh Bobby, he almost has a point, but he's so annoying I don't even care. Wes is adorable but too young and too dumb to run the exterior. Someone promote Max already! 

Adam makes me sick! He is exactly why the whole world finds Americans obnoxious. He is:

parks-and-recreation-Jean-Ralphio-the-wo

My parents were born in Croatia and when I saw the way Adam was acting on the beautiful streets of Dubrovnik   I wanted to punch him in his face,  I actually yelled at the tv...."show some respect!!".   What an ass!

I liked the watching the Croatian singers.  I could understand what they were singing.  My parents used to listen to Croatian music all the time so it brought back a lot of memories.

I don't care if Lauren was being messy.  I'm damn glad she squealed on Malia.  Malia's games have been going on long enough and it' about time she got busted.  Right now only Adam knows what is really going on.  Wes is still clueless and I need him to find out that Malia and Adam hooked up before the cruise and I need Wes to find out about the lovey dovey texts she sending to Adam the very same night she was making out with Wes.  I was getting bored and irritated watching her play these two men so I'm glad some of the truth came out.  I can't wait for it all to come out so I can watch it all explode in her face.

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7 hours ago, ShawnaLanne said:

 

I'm not a man and skew pretty hard hetro on the Kinsey scale,  so I  don't get it. She's pretty,  but not any more attractive than the other women, except for Fuggs, on the boat. Is it pheremones? Does she look that much better in person? I don't see it. Her Jenny McCarthy bit, the I'm hot and like fart jokes thing? 

 

I don't find Malia anything super-special, either.  I asked my husband what he thought of her and I'm embarrassed to post his answer, but here goes.  He said she reminds him of a blonde, cute/not sexy, tiny version of Angelina Jolie and that if he was working on the boat 20 years younger and hadn't met me yet he'd probably be into her.  I really wish I hadn't asked.

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(edited)

I'm still confused as to what is so amusing about Malia to men.  She seems so blank faced.  Why is that appealing?  She also seems to have very little personality.  I don't even see anything out of the ordinary about her looks.  I don't get it. An average looking girl, who avoids eye contact a lot and is not very personable.....odd, that she's so popular, imo. 

Edited by SunnyBeBe
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8 hours ago, VagueDisclaimer said:

Right. And what a bevy of men there is to choose from. It's really Lauren's loss lol,

Haha!! Spot on! Adam is gross. He always looks greasy/grubby. Bobby..nope. The most appealing guy is the one with the gf who came to visit. If these guys think Malia is the hottest female they've seen, they obviously don't get out much.in real life OR Below Deck life.

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1 hour ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I'm still confused as to what is so amusing about Malia to men.  She seems so blank faced.  Why is that appealing?  She also seems to have very little personality.  I don't even see anything out of the ordinary about her looks.  I don't get it. An average looking girl, who avoids eye contact a lot and is not very personable.....odd, that she's so popular, imo. 

She also slouches.  I don't like that in man or woman.

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(edited)
Quote

I agree. Still if that was the case he has no reason to be mad at Wes. He didn't know. He's just jumping on the opportunity to be an ass because Wes hooked up with a subordinate and then promoted her. 

I agree. They both should be mad at Malia (if Wes ever finds out about the texts and the pre-show relationship between Adam and Malia). Sigh, they will probably just be mad at each other, because that seems to be a trend on these shows.

This is from previous episodes but I liked that Captain Sandy was trying to teach all the deckhands with their turns at docking/leaving the dock, not just one person. I thought Bobby, Malia, and Max were about equal when they had their turns. I would not expect any of them to be perfect since I do not think any of them had the opportunity before.

Quote

Wes saying the captain approved this was kinda bullshit.  He was trying to push off his responsibility in the decision. 

I agree. I guess Captain Sandy did sort of approve it, but Wes made it seem like she gave more input into the decision than she actually did. 

Edited by Misslindsey
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38 minutes ago, dleighg said:

That fiercely waving flag got a lot of attention this episode and I was curious about the odd three-leg thing. It is the Isle of Mann for those who want to know :)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flag_of_the_Isle_of_Man#/media/File:Civil_Ensign_of_the_Isle_of_Man.svg

I also was wondering also and mentioned to hubby about that 3 legged emblem?

Malia is such a douche. It's not that she's female or that she thinks she's cute. If f she were a man and hooking up with Wes it would be viewed the same way.

When she said she was "working her way up the industry" it gave me pause. Is she gonna hook up with Sandy next?

13 minutes ago, Misslindsey said:

I agree. They both should be mad at Malia (if Wes ever finds out about the texts and the pre-show relationship between Adam and Malia). Sigh, they will probably just be mad at each other, because that seems to be a trend on these shows.

This is from previous episodes but I liked that Captain Sandy was trying to teach all the deckhands with their turns at docking/leaving the dock, not just one person. I thought Bobby, Malia, and Max were about equal when they had their turns. I would not expect any of them to be perfect since I do not think any of them had the opportunity before.

I agree. I guess Captain Sandy did sort of approve it, but Wes made it seem like she gave more input into the decision than she actually did. 

Sandy signed off on it not knowing that Malia and Wes are mashing up. Iwonder if Sandy would approve if she were aware of situation.

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I don't get all the hate towards Bugs. Calling her Fugly is pretty harsh. Her big crime is that she chafes under Hanna's rule? Every deck hand has said they want to be a captain. But when Bugs shows ambition she's ugly? Every one of us would have looked at that iPad. Who among us wouldn't spill a little tea on a boss we didn't like? I get that she can be a little smug. But Fugly? 

 I don't get all the hate towards Malia. So she's dating two guys. So what? She's not married - not engaged - completely single.

Just because Adam assumed he had her all to himself doesn't mean he did. He's acting like a big psychotic baby. If she chooses Wes, then just step back. I don't think dating two guys on the same small ship is such a great idea, but I don't think she owes anyone an apology. She may genuinely be interested in both. 

Bobby is a horse's ass. For him to be spouting off about anybody being unprofessional is a joke. For goodness sake, this grown man with grey hair can't count! Mr. Firefighter can't do simple math! He back talked the Captain! I imagine he feels silly competing against twenty somethings for an assistant deckhand job and wants to advance as quickly as possible. Probably shouldn't have quit the day job though. Newsflash Bobby - just because you want something, doesn't mean that anyone is required to give it to you!! Or if they don't, that it's anyone's fault but yours. 

And Lauren - manufacturing drama because she has nothing of her own going on. Out of everyone, she gets under my skin the most. These yappy puppy kind of girls are the worst. They are never the subject of gossip because they never do anything, but they always insinuate themselves into any drama for attention. 

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(edited)
5 hours ago, diadochokinesis said:

I can't believe she wasn't getting it that the guys weren't upset that she got the position because she was pretty but because she was making out with Wes.

Oh, I think she gets it but she's playing dumb, as if she and Wes weren't kissing/making out/hooking up at work and the fact they didn't have a personal relationship (ha ha) had nothing to do with her promotion.   So she plays the "female and cute" card, which is offensive.   Bobby and Max were absolutely correct to be pissed about it.  Wes has shown Malia favoritism from the start and given her more of his time, leaving Bobby and Max to their own devices.  So of course he's going to see that Malia is working harder because he doesn't truly see anyone BUT Malia. 

I don't think that Bobby should have brought up quitting the fire department because that really has nothing to do with whether or not he's promoted.  Stick to the fact that favoritism has been shown from shift scheduling to working directly with Wes to senior deckhand being chosen.  That's enough.

27 minutes ago, Hockeymom said:

She's dating two guys. So what? She's not married - not engaged - completely single.

It's not that she's single and dating two guys.  She's dating two guys that work together and bunk together and she's pitting them against each other.  I froze my screen on Adam's phone when he was showing the texts and those were pretty damning.  If he's correct about the day, she was texting Adam about missing him and hoping they could share a hotel room their last night in Croatia before getting together again after he's in Boston or done with Boston or something like that, complete with hearts and kissing emojis  Based on the time on the text, in less than an hour, she was making out with Wes.  She's telling Wes one thing; Adam another.  It's not cool.  At least be honest and preferably not hook up with two of your seven co-workers (three of whom are female.)  

Edited by psychoticstate
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2 hours ago, Giselle said:

Sandy signed off on it not knowing that Malia and Wes are mashing up. Iwonder if Sandy would approve if she were aware of situation.

I agree she signed off but Wes definitely made is sound like it was more her than him. 

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17 minutes ago, Xcptnl said:

I agree she signed off but Wes definitely made is sound like it was more her than him. 

Yup.  Listening to Wes tell it, Sandy gave her input rather than stating she would agree with Wes' choice.  Bottom line, Wes and Wes only made the choice.  Unless, of course, you count his boner in the decision making process. 

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18 minutes ago, psychoticstate said:

She's telling Wes one thing; Adam another.  

See - I don't think she is. I think she's telling them both the same thing. She can be telling Wes she likes him and be telling Adam she likes him as well. It's not lying if you actually like two people at the same time. They are trying to make her choose. In that context, Adam's text is this big smoking gun. But, I think she's been pretty clear that she has feelings for each of them. We saw her run after Adam, right in front of Wes. She told Adam that she'd been kissing Wes and was planning on going out for a date. She, herself, told about the tryst on anchor watch. 

I don't see her pitting the guys against each other. They each like her. She likes each of them. How the boys choose to behave is on them, not her.

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I'm not sure if Malia  was texting Adam the same night as her make-out session with Wes.  Technically that was Wes's anchor watch not Malia's.  We saw Malia on an anchor watch an episode or two earlier.  Regardless it does seem she went from telling Adam they were in the friend zone to suggesting they hook up in a hotel at the end of the season.  

I don't think she's being straight up with either of the guys.  

Adam's behavior on the town was despicable.  

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