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S03.E01: Cookie Jar / S03.E02: None of Your Business

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Maggie hosts a game night to welcome Bruce's new girlfriend into the fold. Emma discovers that this is what 40 looks like.

 

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Emma tries to rescue Tina from a pyramid scheme. Maggie starts a nursing rotation with a cold doctor.

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I had a moment of panic when I saw this thread, thinking I'd missed the premiere episodes! Thank goodness they're still a week away. (But bummer, they're a week away!)

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Yes, it should all be on Demand or so I've read. so happy it's back.

Anyone know if they're doing a time jump?

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I'm so happy to have this show back.  A little nervous for how they're going to cram in the major storyline, given the probability this is the final season (maybe the long delay was partly a result of real-life issues, but the timeslot certainly suggests the network is not overly invested in this show), but excited.

I wish USA had re-aired the first two seasons so I could have refreshed my memory (but since it can barely be arsed to air this season, I'm not surprised); I remember I love it, and several reasons why, but a lot of past scenes are lost to me.

"I need a moment, I'm sorry" when the self-defense instructor learns of the relationship between Maggie and Emma was my first favorite moment and that was only a minute in. 

The high-pitched "Jurassic Park!" was another one.

And "Why didn't you guys just go [mimics Home Alone poster]?"

An entire episode about romantic relationships/lack of romantic relationships is never my cup of tea.  But Mark reassuring Emma about the changes in his body was so cute and sweet.  Maggie leaving out a cheese platter to make Emma vulnerable to another strike was a great ending.  And I'm just so happy the show is back.  But I wouldn't have led with this.

I was much more into the second episode.

Yay, Birdbones!  I was excited about this episode from the moment I got a glimpse of her.  She totally would fall for a pyramid scheme -- and Emma totally would fall for Brianna (I don't know the character's name, but the actor plays Brianna on Grace & Frankie)'s challenge.  I love seeing Emma and Birdbones team up together, despite the Mark history, because everyone handled things the right way when it comes to one relationship ending and another relationship beginning with no overlap, out of respect for everyone involved.  So refreshing.  "Body be bangin' and, P.S., a mind to match" was lovely.  Birdbones' pyramid takedown was even better.  Also Dress Barn.  And "Someone must have called in a tip."  Loved it.

Maggie's co-worker looks like a younger version of Alton Brown.

"You look like Lisa Rinna" cracked me up.

The actor playing Birdbones' first customer appeared in one of my (many) favorite episodes of Cold Case, so I'm glad to see from the promo she'll turn up again.

I'm so happy to have this show back. 

Edited by Bastet
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Just a quick question. I haven't read the remarks yet because this doesn't air until 11pm on the west coast. (San Diego) Is it airing that late for anyone else? It's not for special programing either. It's following reruns of Modern Family. 

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I am so glad this show is back.  It's a funny show filled with pleasant and essentially nice people.  I loved Emma popping up places and wondering why she was doing that.  Birdbones got to stand up for herself.  I also loved that eating spaghetti with a white blazer made someone fearless.

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9 hours ago, Bastet said:

The actor playing Birdbones' first customer appeared in one of my (many) favorite episodes of Cold Case, so I'm glad to see from the promo she'll turn up again.

 

That's Mary Pat, mother of Bruce, grandmother of Baby Charlotte, so she does pop up from time to time. She had a pretty big plot in last year's premiere as well (making tomato sauce with Bruce), but I don't know if we've seen her since then? She's fantastic.

I don't know why USA would wait until 11pm on a Friday night to air this wonderful show, and also not lead up to that premiere with a mini-marathon of previous episodes? But I'm glad it's back, regardless of programmatic shenanigans. 

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I feel like I should buy a Rav5 not because I need a car but to support the show.

I loved that Charlotte also turned her head to watch Bird bones walk away.

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5 hours ago, swimmyfish said:

That's Mary Pat, mother of Bruce, grandmother of Baby Charlotte, so she does pop up from time to time. She had a pretty big plot in last year's premiere as well (making tomato sauce with Bruce), but I don't know if we've seen her since then? She's fantastic.

Oh yeah, that's right.  See, this is why I needed them to re-run seasons one and two before starting season three; I've forgotten too much!

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56 minutes ago, Bastet said:

Oh yeah, that's right.  See, this is why I needed them to re-run seasons one and two before starting season three; I've forgotten too much!

They are all available On Demand, though I too wish they would have done a marathon.

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"Mags, what's going on? Are you in love with Cookie? 'Cause I'd understand that." I love this show.

"Take the baby; leave the yogurt." Someone was watching The Godfather. Hee.

I love that Birdbones/Tina is now a friend. This show is very women-positive in that respect.

I hate the airtime, but I'm so glad the show is back.

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The first two seasons are on Xfinity On Demand through August 19, 2018 (!) and I expect season 3 will be too.  I don't have time to check the USA website, because I have just discovered all of season 3 is on Xfinity On Demand expiring TODAY (June 24) and I am binge-watching.  Did I miss a media announcement?  Back in 8 hours.

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6 hours ago, kassygreene said:

The first two seasons are on Xfinity On Demand through August 19, 2018 (!) and I expect season 3 will be too.  I don't have time to check the USA website, because I have just discovered all of season 3 is on Xfinity On Demand expiring TODAY (June 24) and I am binge-watching.  Did I miss a media announcement?  Back in 8 hours.

And... done!

Ok, anyone wanting to catch up before watching season 3, USA does have the entire series on their website, with seasons 1 & 2 expiring August 20, 2018, and season 3 expiring June 24, 2018.  I would swear that six hours ago when I started season 3 was expiring today, but whatever.  As far as I can tell, you don't have to be anyone's cable subscriber (although it's probably geo-locked for country).

And oh yes, it's still really good.  I'm now confused, does USANetwork want to continue or is the weird mid-summer late Friday night scheduling of two episodes per week really mean what it looks like - burn it off?

Edited by kassygreene

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2 minutes ago, kassygreene said:

And oh yes, it's still really good.  I'm now confused, does USANetwork want to continue or is the weird mid-summer late Friday night scheduling of two episodes per week really mean what it looks like - burn it off?

That's what it looks like to me kassygreene. But I already feared the worst when it took almost 2 years to start the new season. Oh well. I guess we're lucky we got 3 seasons. Thanks for the tip about all the episodes on the USA site. I'll check it out.

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I just finished watching the entire new season on USA's website, since I couldn't watch it on demand on my TV at present. (It's only 4 hours, so ....) I have to say that the first couple of episodes left me cold and I was having trouble remembering why I liked the show. But as it went along, I began to remember, and I think the show itself remembered as well. Later on there's more of that playful back-and-forth banter that they do so well. And that loving warmth! It got good and funny, even when it became suddenly serious ... or I should say, especially when it became suddenly serious. It's a shame USA is burning it off in 4 short weeks, but it was fun while it lasted.

Can't believe it took them 2 years to bring it back!

I'm surprised Tara didn't write an article on the premiere episodes.  Maybe on Monday?

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27 minutes ago, Lingo said:

Can't believe it took them 2 years to bring it back!

Pretty certain that part of the delay was because of Jessica's health issues. 

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I really liked the first ep, I laughed quite a bit. (the terrible looking warm bananas on the plate looked horrible)

I liked the Cookie character, hope she sticks around and get to see her again. "You're dead!"

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I watched the previous seasons online just before Friday, so I was ready for season 3!  And it didn't disappoint.  I thought both episodes were great, and I really wish/hope they can find a way to continue this show.  I am tempted to binge the rest of it on line... but at the same time, I would like to savor the remaining episodes.  Decisions, decisions...

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I don't know why exactly, but after seeing the 2nd episode I have a strong desire to by a Toyota Rav4.

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I spent the whole bird bones/business episode convinced that Vanessa was Sarah Chalke.

I've missed this show. Welcome back.

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I discovered this show halfway into its second season so I was able to pretty much binge the first season and jump right into the second and became immersed in it and fell in love with these two.  With the long delay, it  took me awhile to get re-acclimated to the girls, I didn't get into the groove til about the fourth episode.

RE: these first two, though, I have to agree I am enjoying Cookie.  I love her  "I need a minute" moments where she walks off to the side to cry happy tears.  Also for some reason her delivery of the line "Now this is what I am talking about! women supporting each other!  Being friends.    Now get up here and attack each other."  Just tickled me.

In the second episode, I really wanted Emma to out-shark Miss "Bitch Betta Have My Money" who talked in emoji clap hands.  But in retrospect I am glad Tina got the win.  I am liking her with the dark hair.

Also liked the new doctor. 

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3 hours ago, DearEvette said:

In the second episode, I really wanted Emma to out-shark Miss "Bitch Betta Have My Money" who talked in emoji clap hands.  But in retrospect I am glad Tina got the win.

Me too. I liked that her motivation to speak up was that she really did not like how whatshername was talking to Emma. She's not good at standing up for herself, which makes it even more impressive that she stood up for a friend. And Emma did get the parting shot about the blazer not being Dolce & Gabbana.

I think my favorite bit might've been when Emma was trying to crawl off the mat as Maggie kept attacking with Cookie's encouragement. Hee! Also when Emma handed Tina something breakable to throw down on the floor, only it failed.

I'm so happy to have another eight episodes of this show!

P.S. Mark's shock that Emma's never seen Jurassic Park reminded me of the similar bit earlier this year from Superstore, when the entire store crew was shocked to learn that Amy had never seen the movie. Funny how that movie is the go-to for "you've never seen X?!"

Edited by Black Knight
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11 hours ago, Black Knight said:

Mark's shock that Emma's never seen Jurassic Park reminded me of the similar bit earlier this year from Superstore, when the entire store crew was shocked to learn that Amy had never seen the movie. Funny how that movie is the go-to for "you've never seen X?!"

I think his reaction was because she described very specific scenes from the movie and then claimed to have never seen it.

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On 6/27/2017 at 6:55 AM, biakbiak said:

I think his reaction was because she described very specific scenes from the movie and then claimed to have never seen it.

I don't doubt her claim. She's just smart enough and watches enough TV/film to see the obvious pitfalls and tropes inherent in the concept.

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12 minutes ago, Black Knight said:

I don't doubt her claim. She's just smart enough and watches enough TV/film to see the obvious pitfalls and tropes inherent in the concept.

But it wasn't tropes it was specific scenes like a velociraptor opening a door and a few others that aren't just pitfalls of the concept.

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1 hour ago, biakbiak said:

But it wasn't tropes it was specific scenes like a velociraptor opening a door and a few others that aren't just pitfalls of the concept.

It didn't go on anywhere near as long as you're remembering, as she only mentioned one scene. First she asked why anyone would open such a park, then said that the power would go off and all hell would break loose. That's just obvious. Then she mentioned that some dinosaurs are really smart and used that to extrapolate a scenario where a velociraptor might open a door, and it ended there. That actually is a trope, in that animals in Hollywood are very often shown doing stuff that the average animal couldn't/wouldn't do. The fact that she hit upon the velociraptor scene with a combination of logic and her classic zany rambling is what made the bit funny. She wasn't lying about not having seen the movie.

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I guess we will have to agree to disagree because knowing the exact dinasour and that it opens a door is very specific and not a random guess. I also think Keenan' reaction and how it played makes more sense that she has clearly seen it rather than just being surprised that she has never seen it.

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I think that was the whole crux of joke though.  The gag is clearly that Emma never saw the movie but could just off the top of her head come up with ideas about dinosaurs that just coincidentally happened the exactly the way they did in the movie.  Hence the astonished expression on mark's face when he realized she never saw the movie.

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14 minutes ago, DearEvette said:

I think that was the whole crux of joke though.  The gag is clearly that Emma never saw the movie but could just off the top of her head come up with ideas about dinosaurs that just coincidentally happened the exactly the way they did in the movie.  Hence the astonished expression on mark's face when he realized she never saw the movie.

And I think the crux of the joke is that she has seen it but she says the reason she couldn't name the movie in time was because she had never seen it. If she knows all its tropes than why couldn't she name it?

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29 minutes ago, rhys said:

Does that game (charades?) really work that way with a tilted smart phone?

Yes. Though there are several different apps.

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5 hours ago, biakbiak said:

And I think the crux of the joke is that she has seen it but she says the reason she couldn't name the movie in time was because she had never seen it. If she knows all its tropes than why couldn't she name it?

But that's just not funny. If your interpretation was what the joke was meant to be, they would have continued by having her called out on her lie, because then that would have made it funny. Maggie would've said something about having seen the movie with Emma umpteen years ago and to just own up that she'd seen the movie but just couldn't come up with the name, and she and Mark would've ragged on Emma until she broke and yelled that she did see it. That's funny. But in any case, Emma's clearly not struggling with trying to remember the title - she hears the premise and just reacts to the premise and starts distractedly rambling. And it doesn't make any sense that she'd lie about not having seen the movie. Why would she bother? It's not the sort of thing she'd care about. If she was trying to save herself some embarrassment, and I don't think she'd be embarrassed enough by something like that anyway, but it's the only motive I can even see for why she'd lie - if she has indeed seen Jurassic Park, she'd find it more embarrassing to say she hadn't seen the movie than to say that the title just slipped her mind.

And again, it was a short bit. "All its tropes" is overstating, as she really only says two things. First, that the dinosaurs will run amok once the power goes off, which anyone who knows how movies go can predict just from hearing the premise. But then she starts to think of what specifically could happen and in her speculation happens to hit on the velociraptor scene. And the way she words it and delivers it points to it being speculation rather than something she's actually seen - she doesn't sound at all like she's describing something she's actually seen. Yes, it is really, really specific, but that's exactly what makes her speculation funny, that she's never seen the movie but hits perfectly on that specific ridiculous scene. If they'd just left it at her first guess, it wouldn't have been funny because anyone who knows movies can guess that. But only Emma can guess the velociraptor opening the door, because her thinking's so warped. Heh.

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On 6/28/2017 at 5:23 PM, biakbiak said:

If she knows all its tropes than why couldn't she name it?

Tropes are tropes for a reason.  It's a monster movie and follows some common monster movie tropes. That's why I see the joke as Black Night sees it.  That said, I don't know that it matters who is right and who is wrong as long as the joke, as interpreted, works.

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I clearly didn't love these 2 episodes because I was distracted by the following;

If Maggie is a nurse with a known allergy to bee stings, she would take an antihistamine or request steroids, instead of walking around with an extreme (but non-anaphylactic) allergic reaction.  I don't find that kind of humor, which relies on her being medically incompetent, to be funny.

It also bugs me that Maggie is wearing her hair down while performing nursing duties.  She's worn ponytails before. This would be a good time to do so.  Also, is the patient supposed to eat the pudding after someone else has had the spoon in their mouth? Is there a second spoon?  Since it seems as though she is being set up to date the doctor, please make her realistically competent.

Keegan-Michael Key is always welcome.

Edited by ItCouldBeWorse

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Just to tie it up - Jessica and Lennon have a one-page Q&A in this week's Entertainment Weekly that confirms that Emma never saw Jurassic Park. Turns out that Jessica won't watch any movie that's remotely scary.

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My husband and I re-watched all of S1 and S2 on USA before heading into S3. There is a running gag that Emma doesn't watch scary movies, and Maggie tells her the plot points so she occasionally pretends to have watched a movie that she actually hasn't.

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