S05.E14: Injustice For All

[Primetimer]

Kelly suffers minor burns, but -- unlike her much worse off fire buddy -- makes sure to be a major pain about it.

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[Primetimer]

Also: contains more face-swallowing kisses for Emily and Brandon, so don't say you weren't warned.

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[TeeVee329]

Valerie's eye roll in that GIF is not only gorgeous, but she looks gorgeous as well.  I can't wait until Val gets more central to these episodes.

Edited November 7, 2016 by TeeVee329

[SoupThrower]

Steve, Brandon, Donna, Ray, Andrea and Jackie. Geez really. Really really really bad. Also add in Erica cause Erica.

Jesse's glorious moment but his point still sadly rings 100% today.

And with that David is now a supporting character. Congrats Brian Austin Green. You've gone from being a main character involved in storylines to basically having none at all. Get that $$$ for a couple of lines. Living the dream. Best part is that the next episode cuts half of what he does cause music rights for Christmas music.

[SoupThrower]

And we never see Emily again. Or Griffin. 

[TeeVee329]

So the episode offers no specifics as to why Allison was so badly burned vs. Kelly?

[txhorns79]

I always enjoyed that Kelly somehow suffered serious burns to her neck, but her terrible hair is not even singed. 

[benteen]

Kelly was probably using her as a human shield...

Just finished looking at the Visual Aids.  Good lord, you're right...how did she get more burnt than Kelly?

I had forgotten that Emily and her awful hair were in this episode.

Quote

It's nice that Dylan's getting through rehab by wearing the twin sweatshirt that went with his late father's gigantic track pants.

Gold, Jerry.  GOLD!

Brandon's big pants and Jason Priestley's short height constantly make me laugh.

Edited November 7, 2016 by benteen

[jenrising]

Even fire wants nothing to do with that mess on Kelly's head. 

[CurlyATX]

seriously, how do they explain the trauma differences between the two girls? And it is true that we never see Emily again?

[Nanna]

Oh, great. The time has come for the Kelly's invisible scar episodes.

[Princess Sparkle]

I can never decide which "main character catching on fire" storyline I find more ridiculous - this one, or Chardonnay on Footballer's Wives (that's a very specific reference, I know)  

[vendredi3]

Jumping ahead, but god I hope you discuss the ridiculously low production value of the FBI office in the next episode, because it is perhaps the most laughable "set" this series has ever shown us!

[StatMom]

Another ridiculous things about all these so-called burns: based on the extensive bandaging, Alison has a large area that has been severely damaged. And yet, a day or two later, she's conscious and capable of chatting?!? I don't think so. Oh, but I guess she's plucky!

[Ions Earring]

oh and Steve also replies dee nada.

[Petunia13]

6 hours ago, TeeVee329 said:

Valerie's eye roll in that GIF is not only gorgeous, but she looks gorgeous as well.  I can't wait until Val gets more central to these episodes.

Her makeup is beautiful I love that eye contour. She is so pretty. 

[Panda Bear]

5 hours ago, Princess Sparkle said:

I can never decide which "main character catching on fire" storyline I find more ridiculous - this one, or Chardonnay on Footballer's Wives (that's a very specific reference, I know)  

I think Footballers' Wives has to win, because wasn't it specifically her breasts that got burned at her bachelorette party, causing people to call her Crispy Tits? (I mean, even just writing that sentence made me want to watch Footballers' Wives again immediately, while I have no desire to ever watch this 90210 episode again.) 

[Princess Sparkle]

That is what happened. And specifically, drunk fans spilled a glass of champagne on her, then got too close with a candelabra they were using to light their cigarettes, and her lei caught on fire. 

God I miss that show. 

[scarynikki12]

Kelly wouldn't have gotten burned if Brandon was there because she would have used him as her second shield.  Then she could have avoided the horror of a slightly pink earlobe.

Seriously, they should have just gone with severe smoke inhalation for Kelly since they weren't willing to show her burned.  And, if they had to keep Allison as super duper burned, then a simple throwaway comment about the wall/ceiling on her side falling on her moments before they were rescued would have sufficed.  Then we wouldn't all be assuming that Kelly used her as that shield. 

[MerBearStare]

2 hours ago, Panda Bear said:

I think Footballers' Wives has to win, because wasn't it specifically her breasts that got burned at her bachelorette party, causing people to call her Crispy Tits?

OMG, why did I never watch this show?! Regrets, I have them.

Val is so gorgeous, even when rolling her eyes. I don't know why she wasted her time on Dylan. Then Steve. Then Brandon. Then David. Then that creepy-looking older guy who was married, so she faked a pregnancy.

What I hate about this episode, and the last one, is that they talk about Emily like she's the great love of Brandon's life. When you watch the season 2 episodes, though, they weren't that big of a deal. And at the senior breakfast, Brandon says the ice skater was his favorite girlfriend of the week. Then they have like 3 days together in San Francisco and suddenly they're soulmates? It seems like this storyline had more to do with JP and CE's real life relationship than the characters.

And big ups to Sarah for using the word jag and for the Jessica Fletcher reference. Maybe after you get through all 293 episodes of 90210 (holy shit, there were 293 episodes of 90210?!), you can recap all 264 episodes of Murder, She Wrote.

Edited November 8, 2016 by MerBearStare

[bilgistic]

Doesn't Kelly wear a hand bandage for the next 3,000 episodes?

[benteen]

The image of Brandon braying at a burning fire makes me laugh.

[Sarah D. Bunting]

Yes.

[Sarah D. Bunting]

And Kelly were the shieldee, how'd she get burned on her back? 

And, speaking as someone who has 100+ stitches' worth of scarring on her back and shoulders (thanks, sketchy moles!), seriously, who cares. Life isn't a disfigurement. It's just life. Get over it.

[benteen]

1 hour ago, Sarah D. Bunting said:

And Kelly were the shieldee, how'd she get burned on her back? 

And, speaking as someone who has 100+ stitches' worth of scarring on her back and shoulders (thanks, sketchy moles!), seriously, who cares. Life isn't a disfigurement. It's just life. Get over it.

Maybe Kelly saw that window that the camera crew did a bad job of trying to hide.

Kelly is reveling in what happened to her in this episode.  "I'm in pain and I've been burned!"

Jackie REALLY comes off terribly here and in this season.

[CurlyATX]

Can we just fast-forward to the cult already?

[CurlyATX]

Two things: Donna is turning 20 this Christmas as a sophomore which means that she isn't the baby of the group.  Most of the gang minus David must be turning 20 in that school year.  Later on, doesn't she become the youngest?

Other thing- Steve!  I used to think that Rush was just the worst and felt sorry for Steve.  If I were Steve's parent, I would have thrown the book at him.  AND made sure he did the 1000 hours of community service.  If I were Griffin, I'd have made sure that the "clerk in our pocket" didn't add Steve to the list. 

[benteen]

The cult...I forget how LONG 90210 seasons were.  We still have the cult, along with Dylan's Brazilian adventure and Val buying the club.  Not to mention David's crazy mother, Ray sleeping with Valerie, the trip to the convent (?) and Ray doing to Donna what I wish he would have done to Brandon.

[AndySmith]

The trip to the convent happens next season. Also, Dylan's adventures are in Mexico, not Brazil, and I believe happen before the cult story.

[Petunia13]

It was a 100 hours of community service. 

Brandon was such a DICK this episode and Jesse I don't like either. 

[TeeVee329]

I have a question, not having rewatched the episode.  Kelly doesn't know about all the kissing Brandon and Emily did, right?  All she knows is that Emily was in town?

[Petunia13]

I know I knocked him but Brandon as president looks good right now. 

[SoupThrower]

19 hours ago, CurlyATX said:

Two things: Donna is turning 20 this Christmas as a sophomore which means that she isn't the baby of the group.  Most of the gang minus David must be turning 20 in that school year.  Later on, doesn't she become the youngest?

Other thing- Steve!  I used to think that Rush was just the worst and felt sorry for Steve.  If I were Steve's parent, I would have thrown the book at him.  AND made sure he did the 1000 hours of community service.  If I were Griffin, I'd have made sure that the "clerk in our pocket" didn't add Steve to the list. 

David and Clare are supposed to be the youngest. 

 

Donna and Dylan I think are supposed to be the oldest two. So somethingetching about Donna being able to vote when the whole Sue Gil thing happened 2 seasons ago.

[SoupThrower]

20 hours ago, CurlyATX said:

Can we just fast-forward to the cult already?

We are so close. Looked at the episodes and Priestley directed the one she got into the cult. I think she wears the bandages until Dylan has those crappy Western dreams.

[Klaw]

Quote

Chardonnay on Footballer's Wives (that's a very specific reference, I know)  

Princess Sparkle, I love you! How did I forget about "CRISPY TITS"??? Anyone who has never seen it, but loves English shows and/or soaps need to get on it, stat. So much cheesy goodness.

Even before I became a lawyer, I knew better than to have some fucking random non-lawyer interjecting bullshit in an attorney client meeting. And you think she would've known better as well, considering how popular shows like Law & Order and L.A. Law were by that point (not that those are always accurate, mind you, but such protocol is so fucking basic that someone like Andrea would know). And Jessie? Send your dipshit wife out of the damn room when you consult with a client or better yet go to the CLINIC at the law school. UGH shut the hell up OOOOHndrea. 

The Balloon Pants. Just why. Does Jason think they make him look ... taller? Or something? I don't understand.

Love Cult!Kelly! I may just have to rewatch those.

[CurlyATX]

You're right... I think Donna just acts like she's delayed.  Clare and David both have skipped grades: David his junior year and Clare bypassed frosh year due to her credits, right?  In my mind I had this scene for Donna's birthday with that "Damn Bird" where everyone is talking about how Donna is the youngster. 

100 hours of community service is nothing! I thought the judge upped it to 1000.  Even then, it's nothing in comparison to the danger they put peoples' lives in.  Did Griffin's dad pay off Allison and Kelly?

[TeeVee329]

6 hours ago, CurlyATX said:

Did Griffin's dad pay off Allison and Kelly?

I think so?  I believe Tara or Sarah mentioned in the podcast that Jackie told Kelly to come up with a reasonable figure and they'd leave it at that.

[Petunia13]

That's what Grif said but also alluded to Kelly agreeing to sign the statement and being very cooperative so I doubt he had to bribe her too much

Its actually offensive the learning disabled character is the one who behaves so childishly and has no street smarts and dresses like a tart. I actually think what's Donna's depicted as having dyslexia & dyscalculia which I also have.  Numbers and letters transpose or flip also ones that look similar are substituted, like b and d. It's because our brains try to parse information as pictures and patterns. That's why many dyslexics can speed read or solve puzzles fast. However many times it can be overwhelming which was why she had those scenes of being unable to take tests and walking out or yelling in frustrating. Which is also common 

Edited November 9, 2016 by Petunia13

[atlanticslide]

On 11/7/2016 at 8:06 PM, scarynikki12 said:

Seriously, they should have just gone with severe smoke inhalation for Kelly since they weren't willing to show her burned. 

Well but then we wouldn't have gotten all of that amazing drama of Kelly obsessing over her non-existent scars for the next 17 episodes. 

[Uncle JUICE]

Oh god, we're soooooo close to her cult phase, which I believe is led by bobo Agent Gadd in a wheelchair. Brandon, the total NEGATOR! I love the cult arc so much. 

[CurlyATX]

Me too! I may have to rewatch those episodes.  I still get squinked out when the cult leader tells Dylan the he (the cult leader) and Kelly haven't had sex yet, but she basically is his for the taking, unless Dylan wants to pony up the money.  Doesn't Val see this guy as a loser from a mile away?

[Petunia13]

Kelly's weird

[TeeVee329]

12 hours ago, atlanticslide said:

Well but then we wouldn't have gotten all of that amazing drama of Kelly obsessing over her non-existent scars for the next 17 episodes. 

And meanwhile, don't we find out Allison's still in the burn unit in, like the season finale?

[AndySmith]

Nope. She's recovered by then and in love with Kelly.

[atlanticslide]

No, she was definitely in the burn unit until then - Kelly comes to pick her up (because apparently Allison, like Toni and Susan and Ray and Jesse and Joe and Nat and every other minor character has no other friends?) from the burn unit in the season finale (or maybe second-to-last episode), they go back to the beach apartment where Allison spends the night, telling Kelly at some point that she's in love with her, and then heads off to parts unknown. And they neeeeeever saw her again!

(I just watched this episode a few days ago)

[AndySmith]

Ah, ok. I mostly remember Kelly and Allison were having...dinner? And David and Claire see them, then silly rumors start...

[Uncle JUICE]

6 hours ago, AndySmith said:

Ah, ok. I mostly remember Kelly and Allison were having...dinner? And David and Claire see them, then silly rumors start...

Absolutely. I think it was something like a little dinner with a candle (odd choice, all things considered) in their TV room. David and Claire see them from outside the apartment, and are like "Well, I know that one girl is gay, so I bet that she totally turned Kelly gay, I bet they just finished performing gay lesbo sex on each other, snicker snicker, let's start a passive aggressive rumor about them." Now my recollection gets foggy, but I think they go down to the Peach Pit, the gang is there. They sit together. Nat comes over and is all "What can I get you?" And David is like "Anything, it's free anyway, but if you ask that question to a certain someone we know, who was recently horrifically burned on her earlobe, and whose name isn't Telly Kaylor, I bet her answer would be a big plate of #$@%6&!"

God, I hate these kids, why did I watch this show so much????? 

Ok, why DO I watch this show. #confessions. 

[txhorns79]

Quote

No, she was definitely in the burn unit until then - Kelly comes to pick her up (because apparently Allison, like Toni and Susan and Ray and Jesse and Joe and Nat and every other minor character has no other friends?)

I want to say she dumped her girlfriend (for Kelly!) at some point during the story, so perhaps she just alienated all her friends with the sudden action?  It's my fan wank.

I'll also admit that for the longest time, I confused this storyline with Kelly's later Single White Female storyline (for some reason I decided in my head they were connected), and thought Allison's love for Kelly would eventually turn even crazier. 

Edited November 11, 2016 by txhorns79

[Lisin]

2 hours ago, Uncle JUICE said:

Absolutely. I think it was something like a little dinner with a candle (odd choice, all things considered) in their TV room. David and Claire see them from outside the apartment, and are like "Well, I know that one girl is gay, so I bet that she totally turned Kelly gay, I bet they just finished performing gay lesbo sex on each other, snicker snicker, let's start a passive aggressive rumor about them." Now my recollection gets foggy, but I think they go down to the Peach Pit, the gang is there. They sit together. Nat comes over and is all "What can I get you?" And David is like "Anything, it's free anyway, but if you ask that question to a certain someone we know, who was recently horrifically burned on her earlobe, and whose name isn't Telly Kaylor, I bet her answer would be a big plate of #$@%6&!"

God, I hate these kids, why did I watch this show so much????? 

Ok, why DO I watch this show. #confessions. 

You're definitely right about most of that, but it's not the Peach Pit, it's that KEG/Alpha party/conference thingy in Palm Springs and everyone is there and Kelly was supposed to go or something but then doesn't? So when someone asks where she is David and Claire are all gossipy about it and then Brandon finds out and assumes that's why she "chose herself" and Steve falls in love with a trans woman and MAN the end of this season is super problematic on a lot of levels. 

[Uncle JUICE]

Oh my god, I totally made that situation up whole cloth, I can't believe how close it is to true. I forgot this season has 90's gay panic all over it. "Gee, I wonder why Kelly isn't here!" Davic / Claire: "Probably chose to go DOWN ON HER NEW GIRLFRIEND for the whole weekend because she's so gay now! But don't say anything, you didn't hear it from me!"  (High five each other)

 

Jackasses. 

Edited November 11, 2016 by Uncle JUICE