S04.E14: Till Death Do Us Part

[gonecrackers]

3 hours ago, Madding crowd said:

My favorite quote of the show was when the new expert lady (forgot her name) said: "Even if the couples all decide to divorce, it doesn't mean the show was not successful." Yes, dear it does. 

I still haven't seen it but sounds like they didn't know what was coming so she had to make a blatant 'CYA' comment, just in case.

[Neurochick]

3 hours ago, Madding crowd said:

My favorite quote of the show was when the new expert lady (forgot her name) said: "Even if the couples all decide to divorce, it doesn't mean the show was not successful." Yes, dear it does. 

In TV land the only thing that makes a show successful are ratings.  If the ratings were good, the advertisers and producers are happy and if they're happy the show was a success.

[Magoo]

3 hours ago, Meowwww said:

Producers!!  STOP with the patched together sentences!!  It drives me absolutely crazy. To the point that I can't listen to what they are saying due to the horrible word and sentence patching-together thing you do!

/rant

Thank you!  It was annoyingly apparent during Sonia's "will-she-won't-she" segment.  There was probably a sum total of 20 seconds of seeing her actually speaking the words, there, on the couch.  The rest was the camera panning around the room, focusing on Nick, the back of Sonia's head, the "experts."  So choppy, the words and sentences so obviously cobbled together from various talking heads.  The entire production crew needs to be fired.  This show would be far more interesting if it were produced and edited properly. 

[cecig75]

I'm curious about the six month reunion. I'm really hoping Nick and Sonia are in this for real and not to get on MAFS The First Year. 

[Lily247]

7 hours ago, Drogo said:

 

Why were Lily and Tom matched together ? Besides the matching tattoos ? Isnt common life goals the basic thing to have in common to succeed as a couple ? SMDH

[nexxie]

6 minutes ago, Matias130 said:

Why were Lily and Tom matched together ? Besides the matching tattoos ? Isnt common life goals the basic thing to have in common to succeed as a couple ? SMDH

Good question. Their mutual father situation was mentioned, but other than that I don't know.

[Madding crowd]

1 hour ago, Neurochick said:

In TV land the only thing that makes a show successful are ratings.  If the ratings were good, the advertisers and producers are happy and if they're happy the show was a success.

Yes but that wasn't what she meant. She went on to talk about learning more about yourself, being a better communicator etc. Every show wants to be successful; but her role is not as a producer but as a matchmaker. 

[Rover]

 Interesting to read the comments here.  I agree with most which helps soften the fact I know I wasted my time (again) on this joke of a show.  The end results of these couplings produce people with far too much baggage for any decent person to want to marry.  I mean, imagine taking one of these players home to meet the family.  First thing they're going to think is that person plays marriage like a fairy tale and isn't serious.  No, he/she wouldn't be welcomed in my home, that's for sure.    

[Dittohead]

3 hours ago, pdlinda1 said:

I also found Sonia's gifts to Nick kind of off-putting....didn't sense much "romance" there...

I was thinking that, too.  It definitely seemed like her "gifts" were meant to be digs.

[Snewtsie]

The night before the decision, Tom was only 85% sure of his decision???  DUDE, in what universe do you think you'll find a better gal than Lily?  Or does your extensive array of past successful relationships make you think you'll stumble across a bus-loving, independently wealthy, bohemian surfer girl who will eagerly wander the earth with you?  Pleeeeeease.  

I was a Tom fan for almost the entire season, but his judgey-judgey attitude and determination to continually test Lily's reactions in this finale episode were just. too. much.

[Vinyasa]

Quote

I also found Sonia's gifts to Nick kind of off-putting....didn't sense much "romance" there...

that is because there is no romance between them.

[Vinyasa]

2 hours ago, cecig75 said:

I'm curious about the six month reunion. I'm really hoping Nick and Sonia are in this for real and not to get on MAFS The First Year. 

It is on next week, isn't it?

Well, Nick may need to promo the t-shirts more so don't put MAFS The First Year past him.

[izabella]

Lily is nuts.  She's already speaking disparagingly of how often Tom talks about the bus and living on the bus, and how much he loves his bus.  And she's sitting there listening to him talk about how much work kids are to raise, implying he's still not into the idea, and she still says she wants to stay married?  Why is she practically crying as she tells him she wants to focus on the positives of their marriage and that they deserve to give it chance, practically pleading with him...WTF?  Why is she so desperate to hold onto him? 

[Wings]

@Drogo.  Your posts are insightful and I agree with every word.  Applause.  

[call me ishmael]

I think if you haven't watched it yet you could safely fastforward to next week's previews.  Everything else is filler.

As i watched this unbelievably drawn out episode--sort of like watching a marathon of Heaven's Gate--i think that i finally figured out what the radical social experiment actually is.  They are testing to see what the human limits of endurance are for television induced boredom.  The producers are running an experiment to see how long they can keep all of us watching without giving us any reason to.

[Lily247]

3 hours ago, nexxie said:

Good question. Their mutual father situation was mentioned, but other than that I don't know.

Ratings. 

[Paddywagon]

Nick seems to like living life on his own terms and if he gets pushed he's quick to flip the bird at anyone in the way. He's demonstrated that with his attitude on the show and with his dog vid.  I think for Sonia that probably means she'll have to go along with most marital decisions he makes.  That might be ok with her because she doesn't seem good at making decisions.  I also think Nick will always be an excellent provider and I doubt they'll ever need for money.  She's totally into him and they might have a shot if he ever decides he loves her.

Tom's found a career where he can make good money with enough to save and still have all the freedom he wants.  He doesn't have to wait for retirement, he can travel and go wherever he wants.  For lots of people nowadays that's the sign of success...to enjoy life as a lifestyle, not to be tied to a job working for The Man 60+ hours a week.  Personally I couldn't be married to someone who works all the time.  I don't think I'd be happy if I were 60 yrs old with a double garage packed with stuff I never use and a life where I can only say I enjoyed myself in 2-week increments of vacation.  But the final word is people should do what makes them happy.  I think Tom and Lily will have a tough time reconciling their lifestyles.

Edited October 27, 2016 by Paddywagon

[Evil Queen]

4 hours ago, cecig75 said:

I'm curious about the six month reunion. I'm really hoping Nick and Sonia are in this for real and not to get on MAFS The First Year. 

I don't see it. IMO he was there to use the show to pawn his shirts and his rental and nothing more. Why she agreed to stick out more time with him will remain a mystery because there is not a little speck of glimmer of chemistry or anything with those 2. 

4 hours ago, Matias130 said:

Why were Lily and Tom matched together ? Besides the matching tattoos ? Isnt common life goals the basic thing to have in common to succeed as a couple ? SMDH

I think they thought the whole bus life would bring in more drama than it actually did. They never match these couples for anything but drama. They don't pick those with common life goals and put them together since it could be to "boring" for tv. *rollseyes* 

[MsPH]

I guess I'm the only one, or one of the few, who was really happy Nick and Sonia decided to stay together. I think they're genuinely cute together, a pair of dorks, and they seem to have a lot more in common than Lilly and Tom despite the lack of instant chemistry. I also think way too much is made out of Nick's outburst. He was drunk, stressed out, frustrated and backed into a corner. I'm sure at that moment in time he wasn't attracted to Sonia, but that doesn't mean that he never was and never will be. Do I think Sonia was his dream woman physically? No, but how many get their dream mate in a situation like this? I don't think he ever found her ugly or even unattractive physically, the attraction just waned the more their wires got crossed and the more pressure he was under. What he said was cruel and I don't blame Sonia for moving out, but in a way it was a good thing, because it changed the dynamic so that Sonia was in power and Nick had to chase her, not that he knows how to do that, but what I mean is that when she became the less eager party, he became more eager. Typical male behaviour. I don't get why people say his face stayed the same, because I thought the opposite. The last couple of episodes he was always looking at her very sweetly and like there was more he wanted to say, but couldn't because he's just so inhibited. He looked genuinely thrilled when she said she's moving back in. I think Nick is just slow to warm up to people and the whole thing got a bit too intense for him at one point. I can relate, because I warm up to people slowly as well, yet after being around someone regularly for a period of time, I grow attached to them, even if they're not particularly close to me. I saw Nick grow attached to Sonia and I found it cute. I'm rooting for them.

Tom and Lilly had those initial sparks, but so do most people at the start of a relationship and most of those relationships end up failing. I figured they'd stay together because they seem in love, or close to it, but I don't know how much long-term potential they have. I also didn't like how Tom had to bring up the bus during the final decision as well, like it was a choice between continuing his bus life or being with his potential partner for life. I mean seriously now? I get that he sees that bus as some sort of an extension of his persona, but I would not like to be weighed against a bus by my potential life partner. Lilly seemed genuinely scared that he'd choose divorce, which raises a red flag for me. He could've told her in advance unless he was really undecided until the last minute.

I also thought Lilly acted a bit like it was a competition when meeting Sonia and Nick. She seemed to enjoy comparing her and Tom's connection to theirs and deeming it superior. Might be a sign of insecurity. People are different and they show affection differently. Not everyone is all over their partner in front of strangers and cameras.

Nick's gift looked like a chain to a pendant, just without the pendant. Sonia looked confused as well. It was a better gift than Tom's ugly big clock though. Sonia's gift was funny and put Nick in his place. Lilly's was just boring.

I don't get why they have to make such a massive deal about the final, FINAL, decision. As if they're stuck together forever unless they choose divorce. The edits were just utterly ridiculous with 25 different clips stuck together to create doubt and suspense. FFS. Next week we'll probably find out both couples were dunzo within a month or something and all that buildup was for nothing as usual.

[pdlinda1]

2 hours ago, Vinyasa said:

I'm curious about the six month reunion. I'm really hoping Nick and Sonia are in this for real and not to get on MAFS The First Year. 

Wasn't there that last snippet of a promo for next week's show where all 4 seem in some state of emotional meltdown, with nick not wearing his wedding ring and the other 3 in various states of dismay...I admit dozing off by that time (PT time...very late for me) but got the distinct impression all was not "honky dory" with either couple.  Am I wrong??  How long can they drag out this farce???  Also, was there some tease re Derek and the "lovely" heather possibly re-thinking their doomed coupling...I only say that because I think the final, final, final, final clip in this marathon

was their next season kickoff in Chicago with seemingly throngs of willing participants eager to get their 15 minutes of "fame"...I took that to mean that this season's group were already thrown into the dustbin of MAFS history...

[LennieBriscoe]

I want to watch "The Drogo Show"!  :-)

As for gifts: I'm thinking Sonia's were pre-emptively defensive, with her never figuring that Nick would get her a piece of jewelry!

The worst gift was Tom's clock! A CLOCK! Not a nice WATCH, mind you! I'd clock HIM......!

Re: Ratings vs. Good Matches: There is no benefit, really, to the show to make lasting marriages as opposed to on-screen drah-ma. Real-life happiness does not come with advertising dollars.

Edited October 27, 2016 by LennieBriscoe

[ChristmasJones]

Can't recall the exact quote, but more than once Sonia referenced the "glimpses" she saw of Nick's good side. IMO, if after 6 weeks, you can only see "glimpses" of someone that are good (or appeal to you), then that is a bad sign.  I personally wouldn't want to marry a guy who seemed to be so far behind the curve in terms of relationship skills. I wouldn't want to be the teacher/coach/role-model/parent in the relationship.  For a guy his age to overtly struggle so much with not only expressing empathy, but expressing any of his own inner emotions at all... that is called stunted in my book. Maybe cute in a 17yo boyfriend, but not a guy at Nick's age (late 20's/early 30's?). 

Maybe Sonia's social-worker tendencies have gotten her hooked into this dysfunctional role - where she feels that she can draw Nick out of his shell, and show her that deep down there is a wonderful guy inside who will just be so loving and affectionate one she helps break down those walls he has built up. I think a lot of women have this tendency.. to think a guy is better than how he actual acts on a regular basis. The whole diamond-in-the-rough type thing. 

Edited October 27, 2016 by ChristmasJones

[Snewtsie]

3 hours ago, izabella said:

Lily is nuts.  She's already speaking disparagingly of how often Tom talks about the bus and living on the bus, and how much he loves his bus.  And she's sitting there listening to him talk about how much work kids are to raise, implying he's still not into the idea, and she still says she wants to stay married?  Why is she practically crying as she tells him she wants to focus on the positives of their marriage and that they deserve to give it chance, practically pleading with him...WTF?  Why is she so desperate to hold onto him? 

YES!  Especially since he told her he wasn't sure which way he would decide.  Do she really want to be married to him when he's admitted he isn't sure he wants to be with her?  

[Snewtsie]

1 hour ago, ChristmasJones said:

Can't recall the exact quote, but more than once Sonia referenced the "glimpses" she saw of Nick's good side. IMO, if after 6 weeks, you can only see "glimpses" of someone that are good (or appeal to you), then that is a bad sign.  I personally wouldn't want to marry a guy who seemed to be so far behind the curve in terms of relationship skills. I wouldn't want to be the teacher/coach/role-model/parent in the relationship.  For a guy his age to overtly struggle so much with not only expressing empathy, but expressing any of his own inner emotions at all... that is called stunted in my book. Maybe cute in a 17yo boyfriend, but not a guy at Nick's age (late 20's/early 30's?). 

Maybe Sonia's social-worker tendencies have gotten her hooked into this dysfunctional role - where she feels that she can draw Nick out of his shell, and show her that deep down there is a wonderful guy inside who will just be so loving and affectionate one she helps break down those walls he has built up. I think a lot of women have this tendency.. to think a guy is better than how he actual acts on a regular basis. The whole diamond-in-the-rough type thing. 

You mean the "I can fix him, he's a work in progress" sort of thing?  Yep - been there, done that, and the only change was me finally realizing how foolish it was.  To quote Albert Einstein ...Men marry women with the hope they will never change.  Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed.

[Passthepopcorn]

Random thoughts...

I realized why I end up watching this show. Even though sometimes it is torture and I wonder why I'm watching.

1- Human relations and behavior are fascinating. Who would do this kind o thing? How do they navigate this and that? How so many of us watch the same situations and people and end up with such different opinions and perceptions.

2- Ultimately, I want to see these participants succeed, find a good partner.  I find my heart racing a little bit at wedding times and at decision times. As if I knew these people. I tend to cheer for them. Even when lots of this show is massively manipulated and you don't know what is real and what is not, I don't think people come to this show to get divorced. I wish they would let things develop more organically. It would be more interesting. But well, I play along.

3- The chance to discuss these things here. For that, thank you everybody!

Next time is Chicago. An hour from home. I'll probably be watching...

[BunnySlippers]

4 hours ago, Paddywagon said:

Tom's found a career where he can make good money with enough to save and still have all the freedom he wants.  He doesn't have to wait for retirement, he can travel and go wherever he wants.  For lots of people nowadays that's the sign of success...to enjoy life as a lifestyle, not to be tied to a job working for The Man 60+ hours a week.  Personally I couldn't be married to someone who works all the time.  I don't think I'd be happy if I were 60 yrs old with a double garage packed with stuff I never use and a life where I can only say I enjoyed myself in 2-week increments of vacation.  But the final word is people should do what makes them happy.  I think Tom and Lily will have a tough time reconciling their lifestyles.

While I agree that experiences mean more in the long run than material possessions, one drawback of such a carefree life is that Tom won't be young and healthy forever, and if he doesn't build up enough of a nest egg while he's still strong and healthy, he might not have the financial security he might need in the future. A serious illness or a job loss can make a big dent in one's savings, and it's much harder to recover from something like that later in life. This might be why Lilly works so hard; because she wants to create that financial security for the future of her family.

But if her goal is to work hard so she can get rich, then yes, that's definitely not something that would fit in with Tom's personality and life goals.

Unfortunately I only got to see the last half hour of the show, so I didn't see the gift giving. What did the couples give each other? It seems Tom gave a clock to Lilly - what kind? And why? Was he trying to "teach  her a life lesson"?

[Snarklepuss]

11 hours ago, Lesia said:

OMG I fell asleep twice, then at 10:15 I checked the programming guide and it said it was over at 11:00 so I said, that's it. I'm going to bed, and will read about this tomorrow on the forum.  My God, dragging it out, for what?? 

I know.  Pity me, Mr. Snarkle fell asleep during the last half and I ended up suffering through it a second time.  The constant repetition, the way they fuck with the audience by showing comments all out of order, splicing together stuff that makes no sense and doesn't follow, plus the OTT music is ridiculous.  I think the show has actually gotten worse since the earlier seasons this way and I almost want to write to them to tell them they're putting people off with this garbage, not creating "suspense" or whatever it is they think they're doing.

Speaking of Mr. Snarkle he thinks both men are putz's who are self centered and know nothing about women.  He said that both of their lines leading up to saying they wanted to stay married were totally lame and self absorbed, and that they should have said something like, "I have decided to stay married because I want nothing more than to wake up to your sweet face every morning from now on".

[jamblastx]

6 hours ago, Snarklepuss said:

I know.  Pity me, Mr. Snarkle fell asleep during the last half and I ended up suffering through it a second time.  The constant repetition, the way they fuck with the audience by showing comments all out of order, splicing together stuff that makes no sense and doesn't follow, plus the OTT music is ridiculous.  I think the show has actually gotten worse since the earlier seasons this way and I almost want to write to them to tell them they're putting people off with this garbage, not creating "suspense" or whatever it is they think they're doing.

Speaking of Mr. Snarkle he thinks both men are putz's who are self centered and know nothing about women.  He said that both of their lines leading up to saying they wanted to stay married were totally lame and self absorbed, and that they should have said something like, "I have decided to stay married because I want nothing more than to wake up to your sweet face every morning from now on".

Agreed...personally I am not a fan of reality television and avoid it as much as possible.  The only reason why I got into this show was because I was hanging out at my girlfriends during a season 1 marathon of the first few episodes and yes, I was intrigued by the premise but also it seemed to have been shot more as a documentary.  I don't remember all of the clearly edited jump/reaction shots that make no sense other than to trick the audience, the ridiculous reality show overly dramatic music, the producer driven 'plots' (everyone...give gifts to one another!, everyone...celebrate father's day even though you don't have a relationship with your father), etc.  Maybe it's my faulty memory, but it sure as shit seemed like a more organic flow.  And now I blame all of you for making me stick to this giant ball of crap.  Even my girlfriend bailed on this...and FYI is one of only four networks that she watches.

[Enero]

10 hours ago, ChristmasJones said:

Can't recall the exact quote, but more than once Sonia referenced the "glimpses" she saw of Nick's good side. IMO, if after 6 weeks, you can only see "glimpses" of someone that are good (or appeal to you), then that is a bad sign.  I personally wouldn't want to marry a guy who seemed to be so far behind the curve in terms of relationship skills. I wouldn't want to be the teacher/coach/role-model/parent in the relationship.  For a guy his age to overtly struggle so much with not only expressing empathy, but expressing any of his own inner emotions at all... that is called stunted in my book. Maybe cute in a 17yo boyfriend, but not a guy at Nick's age (late 20's/early 30's?). 

Maybe Sonia's social-worker tendencies have gotten her hooked into this dysfunctional role - where she feels that she can draw Nick out of his shell, and show her that deep down there is a wonderful guy inside who will just be so loving and affectionate one she helps break down those walls he has built up. I think a lot of women have this tendency.. to think a guy is better than how he actual acts on a regular basis. The whole diamond-in-the-rough type thing. 

Agreed. And as mom always taught me when someone shows you who they are BELIEVE them. Many of us still don't get that concept and as a result constantly find ourselves in a world of hurt when it comes to relationships. 

[Drogo]

FYI:  A new show forum has been created for the new Seven Year Switch: Down Under series FYI kindly shoved down our throats during the MAFS finale.  (Premieres 11/1 after the MAFS follow-up episode.)

[Vinyasa]

Quote

Next time is Chicago. An hour from home. I'll probably be watching...

Oh, great. Does this mean more Jamie and her aftershow thing? How does she manage to stay relevant?

[Empress1]

3 hours ago, Enero said:

Agreed. And as mom always taught me when someone shows you who they are BELIEVE them. Many of us still don't get that concept and as a result constantly find ourselves in a world of hurt when it comes to relationships. 

I live by that Maya Angelou quote after learning it the hard way in a relationship - I wasted so much time. Life got much easier once I learned it and took it to heart.

sonia reminds me a little of my friend, who is a fixer - she's in a helping profession, fosters animals and kids, and is a warm, kind person. She always picks men who need fixing and it always goes badly. She's in therapy now and has recognized that habit and is trying to break it (she's stayed single for a while because of it).

[Snewtsie]

11 hours ago, BunnySlippers said:

Unfortunately I only got to see the last half hour of the show, so I didn't see the gift giving. What did the couples give each other? It seems Tom gave a clock to Lilly - what kind? And why? Was he trying to "teach  her a life lesson"?

Tom gave Lily a clock to symbolize their time together.  And it was big, ugly piece of junk.  The kind of junk Tom preaches people don't need in their lives ...take a hint, Lily.

Edited October 27, 2016 by Snewtsie

[BunnySlippers]

1 hour ago, Snewtsie said:

Tom gave Lily a clock to symbolize their time together.  And it was big, ugly piece of junk.  The kind of junk Tom preaches people don't need in their lives ...take a hint, Lily.

LOL, thanks. That's quite hilarious. :D

[MsPH]

I'm betting Tom got that clock for free from some yacht he was revamping.

[Drogo]

5 minutes ago, MsPH said:

Tom got that clock for free from some yacht he was revamping.

I believe that.

[izabella]

1 hour ago, Snewtsie said:

Tom gave Lily a clock to symbolize their time together.  And it was big, ugly piece of junk.  The kind of junk Tom preaches people don't need in their lives ...take a hint, Lily.

Good call on Tom's part - Lily can use that ugly clock to mark time while waiting for him to want to want a non-bus home and children of their own.  He should have gotten her a big 10-year wall calendar, too, because she will be waiting a long, long time for that, if it ever happens.

[gonecrackers]

2 hours ago, Snewtsie said:

Tom gave Lily a clock to symbolize their time together.  And it was big, ugly piece of junk.  The kind of junk Tom preaches people don't need in their lives ...take a hint, Lily.

I'm a nerd who loves clocks, & probably would've appreciated that much more than jewelry, IF it was a nice one. I haven't seen it yet but am now curious if anyone has a screen shot of it.

[Tara Ariano]

In case you missed it, here's the Previously.TV post on the episode!

Has Married At First Sight's Tom Actually Spent The Whole Experiment In Love With His Bus?

And more questions sparked by the Season 4 finale!

[psychoticstate]

18 hours ago, Paddywagon said:

Tom's found a career where he can make good money with enough to save and still have all the freedom he wants.  He doesn't have to wait for retirement, he can travel and go wherever he wants.  For lots of people nowadays that's the sign of success...to enjoy life as a lifestyle, not to be tied to a job working for The Man 60+ hours a week.  Personally I couldn't be married to someone who works all the time.  I don't think I'd be happy if I were 60 yrs old with a double garage packed with stuff I never use and a life where I can only say I enjoyed myself in 2-week increments of vacation.  But the final word is people should do what makes them happy.  I think Tom and Lily will have a tough time reconciling their lifestyles.

I'm one of those people you mention, Paddywagon.   I have to work the way I do in order to afford living where I do, which means I spend a lot of hours working and commuting.   I would kill for freedom - - not just financial but also my time being my time.  Tom has that, and at 28 that's pretty awesome, and I'm totally jealous.  

It's been questioned why the experts matched Tom and Lily.  I've noticed that every season they always say that opposites attract.  Sure, sometimes they do.  I think they are of the mistaken mindset that someone as ambitious and work oriented as Lily will even out with someone who is more relaxed and wanderlusty, like Tom.  Again, sometimes it can work but there is certainly no guarantee that both persons will thrive under their differences.  The differences could drive each other crazy.  I think the "experts" assumed that with Derek and Heather and we all know how that turned out.     Even Sonia and Nick - - Nick seems introverted and is certainly not one to show emotion and affection while Sonia craves it.

[tumamita]

Nick's friends look drunk as F trying to give their opinion away from Nick. I was dyingggg haha

[Kareem]

4 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

I'm a nerd who loves clocks, & probably would've appreciated that much more than jewelry, IF it was a nice one. I haven't seen it yet but am now curious if anyone has a screen shot of it.

Crackers, it looks a bit like Flav's clock that Drogo posted, except it's black and has legs!  About that size, too, I believe!  Yikes.  

The 10 year wall calendar is too funny.  True.  And funny.  

[Snewtsie]

5 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

I'm a nerd who loves clocks, & probably would've appreciated that much more than jewelry, IF it was a nice one. I haven't seen it yet but am now curious if anyone has a screen shot of it.

You knew someone would get that screen shot of it for you, and I am just the nerd to do it.  Here it is!!  He wrote a note that read, "This gift is a reminder of Time well spent!!"  Since you are someone who loves clocks, now you have to tell us ...do you love this clock?

[Gem 10]

I know I'm being "pickey", but after watching the last episode for the second time, I noticed what Lily was wearing to the breakfast with Nick & Sonia.  Her top had a "v" all the way down to her navel and her girls and red bra were practically in Nicks face who was sitting right across from her.  I'm sure all the guys loved it, but not too classy for. A breakfast.  More like for sitting at a bar.

[jmonkey]

In the immortal words of Meatloaf, "2 out of 3 ain't bad." Congratulations to the couples and high fives, raises, and contract extensions to the "experts." Here are my final thoughts on the couples and the experts/production for this craptacular season:

Nick/Sonia-I've been so frustrated watching this couple all season. I think Sonia is so beautiful and a kind human being. She's one of my faves ever to appear on this show. IMO she deserves better than slick Nick who seemed on this show solely to advertise his business. Sonia has been a saint all season and she has had to overcome so much dealing with his fucking dogs, his inability to communicate, and his drunken rant about not finding her attractive. The latter was hard for me to hear since I'm a guy and find Sonia absolutely stunning. I'd have no trouble telling her she's beautiful everyday. Even so, I'll give Nick a pass on his rant. We've all said things we wish we take back and we, the viewers, don't know the extent of producer manipulation on this show. My point is Nick didn't really change at all. Yeah, he finally dished out a couple of insincere compliments in between drinks (possibly producer coerced or dubbed) and a smooch at the end, but he still never really opened up to Sonia (on camera at least). Of course it's entirely possible he just got a really bad edit. I agree that Nick would probably make an excellent provider and an okay husband, but will he be able to provide the validation that Sonia needs from a partner? I don't think so. I think if they do stay together it will be a cold, soulless marriage and will come with some major compromises on Sonia's part.  I believe Sonia chose to stay in the marriage because her clock is ticking. She's in her 30s and she'll settle for Mr. Goodenough at this point. They both want a nice house and a family and maybe Sonia thinks Nick will eventually come around on opening up and showing affection. Nick agreed to stay with Sonia because he doesn't want to put the work in for a new relationship. If he doesn't stay married to Sonia, he's just going to have to start over with someone else and he probably doesn't want to do that since he takes things at such a snail's pace. The reason he signed up for the show was so the matchmakers could hook him up with his ideal match, and I think he came to the realization, with a little help from his friends, that Sonia would be a good person to try to make a marriage work with. Yeah, he's not attracted to her, but she's passable for him. I think Nick's friends were instrumental in Nick and Sonia staying together. Without their intervention, Sonia might've opted for a divorce and Nick wouldn't have come to the realization that Sonia is probably the best he's going to be able to do. 

Tom/Lily-I enjoyed watching these two all season, but they're such a mismatch on paper. Kudos to them for committing to the process and making it work. Their lifestyles and work attitudes could be what leads to a divorce. Lily lives to work while Tom works to live. Given that Tom is a yacht interior specialist, I doubt that he has to do many projects in a year to make decent money. His clients are wealthy and probably pay him handsomely for his work. Meanwhile, Lily is incredibly career-driven and is trying to build a brand to make as much money as possible for the future. It will eventually grate on her if Tom is constantly taking time off to surf instead of earning money for his future family. If Tom wants this marriage to work, he will have to do all the compromising. He's already had to give up living in his bus, and it seems like he's under the impression they'll be taking the bus out for road trips every weekend. Lily is such a workaholic that they'll be lucky to get two weeks a year. I think Tom agreed to marriage because he's sprung on Lily's ample booty. Once the sex is gone, he's going to feel ignored and will probably retreat to the bus. I just don't get why he did the show to begin with. He clearly has a surfer girl, low maintenance type and Lily is not that person. I think Lily said yes because she can't take another male she cares about leaving her. Her father just disappeared, and I think there could be some residual abandonment issues stemming from that. Anyway, they do have great chemistry and did invest a lot in a short period of time. I'd love for it to work out, but I can see this marriage crashing just as fast as it took off. 

Heather-If the above couples don't end up working out, this ice queen could be the biggest winner this season. She didn't succumb to the Stockholm Syndrome that the others did and quickly realized this show was bullshit, that she was incompatible with Derek, and that it was pointless to try and make something work with someone who was clearly wrong for her.

Derek-He was such a big baby all season. The only MAFS participant I hate more is Ryan "Restraining Order" De Nino from Season 2.

Experts/Production-There is no way any matchmaker would pair the above couples together. It's clear to me that the producers picked the couples to maximize drama, and the role of the experts in this is to try to sell the audience and couples on why they were matched together using psychobabble. Because they're "experts," it supposedly adds legitimacy. It is truly disgusting how the experts/production shame the participants when they don't fully commit to the process due to feelings of incompatibility. I thought the ways McShouty shamed Heather and the way Pepper shamed Sonia were particularly despicable. Couples are led to believe that the "experts" know what they're doing, have their best interests at heart, and are expected to trust they were matched for a reason. They buy into the process so much that they might feel obligated to say "yes" to marriage to not appear as failures to the experts as if something is wrong with them for not making the marriage work. I realize that all of this is just the nature of the reality show beast. McShouty, Pepper, and the other expert definitely did their job this season with 2 out of 3 deciding to stay married. This will allow the show to continue even if the couples don't end up staying together and will keep these "experts" employed for Season 5 in Chicago.

Edited October 28, 2016 by jmonkey

[psychoticstate]

I'm actually not offended by the clock.  I think the meaning is sweet.  There is an interview on People's magazine's online site and Lilly says this:  We did a gift exchange and Tom gave me a clock representing “time” — the time we have to get to know each other and grow together.  Tom said:  I decided to get Lilly a clock because from the beginning I’ve always said all we have is time. And looking back, it was time well spent. She really appreciated the metaphor.

Her brunch, outfit, however is a different story. I also noticed that you could see her red bra. Interesting that I don't recall her dressing in a super revealing way during the regular season.

BTW, Tom mentions in the People interview that the brunch was the day after Decision Day, not the next week as I think the captions said on the show.

[gonecrackers]

1 hour ago, Snewtsie said:

You knew someone would get that screen shot of it for you, and I am just the nerd to do it.  Here it is!!  He wrote a note that read, "This gift is a reminder of Time well spent!!"  Since you are someone who loves clocks, now you have to tell us ...do you love this clock?

Thanks very much! I actually just watched the show & saw it there too but wished they had a better shot of it. It was dark in the yard, a shadow over it... I'm not a connoisseur of clocks LOL, I just like them. Seems like wood, which I like (black is not a fav); but I do like Roman Numerals, & it has kind of a vintage look I can appreciate. It's actually quite small; fits in her hands like that, & could sit nicely on a shelf. Honestly, I did like the symbolism, & felt it was thoughtful, especially coming from him.

It was light years from Nick's plain chain gift to Sonia! As for Sonia's gift I was wondering, humor or passive aggression...

Edited October 28, 2016 by gonecrackers

[Lion18]

14 hours ago, jamblastx said:

Agreed...personally I am not a fan of reality television and avoid it as much as possible.  The only reason why I got into this show was because I was hanging out at my girlfriends during a season 1 marathon of the first few episodes and yes, I was intrigued by the premise but also it seemed to have been shot more as a documentary.  I don't remember all of the clearly edited jump/reaction shots that make no sense other than to trick the audience, the ridiculous reality show overly dramatic music, the producer driven 'plots' (everyone...give gifts to one another!, everyone...celebrate father's day even though you don't have a relationship with your father), etc.  Maybe it's my faulty memory, but it sure as shit seemed like a more organic flow.  And now I blame all of you for making me stick to this giant ball of crap.  Even my girlfriend bailed on this...and FYI is one of only four networks that she watches.

Yes!  Season one to me was more of a documentary, organic and not heavily edited

Now its sentences spliced into each other  what a mess!

I really hope I can keep from watching next season

2 hours ago, Gem 10 said:

I know I'm being "pickey", but after watching the last episode for the second time, I noticed what Lily was wearing to the breakfast with Nick & Sonia.  Her top had a "v" all the way down to her navel and her girls and red bra were practically in Nicks face who was sitting right across from her.  I'm sure all the guys loved it, but not too classy for. A breakfast.  More like for sitting at a bar.

Welcome to Floridah!

Edited October 28, 2016 by Lion18
Typo

[LennieBriscoe]

Lily is hooked on somethin' somethin', and I don't mean Tom's bus. 

I like clocks, too, and have little Waterford and Wedgwood ones, plus a cute "Peanuts" alarm clock. But for that moment, I think Nick had the right idea.

The clock: http://www.uberbazaar.com/clocks/table-clock-with-white-intricate-design-roman-numerals

Good thing for Tom's bus maintenance that there exist materialists who own yachts. Heh.

Edited October 28, 2016 by LennieBriscoe

[film noire]

On 10/27/2016 at 7:54 PM, jmonkey said:

. I agree that Nick would probably make an excellent provider and an okay husband, but will he be able to provide the validation that Sonia needs from a partner? 

I wouldn't bet on Nick being a good provider -- men like Nick (withholding, immature, and emotionally abusive when upset) don't suddenly turn generous with money -- they usually use it as a weapon/means of control. And Nick thinking relationships should just happen without needing work is such a red flag as to what he'd be willing to give out, imo -- whether it be financial support or (as you say) emotional validation.

I think the best part of the season finale is this part of the recap:

"... we're almost done hearing all the euphemisms everyone uses for Nick's outburst at Sonia five episodes ago. "Sonia's frustrated in some parts of her marriage." You mean the part where her husband told her he didn't like her? "Sonia's learning how to forgive probably like she's never had to before." True: before, she never had a TV production force her to continue spending time with someone who told her he didn't like her. Sonia was "so emotionally taken aback by everything." "Everything" is a very concise way of describing "that time I told her I didn't like her," NICK. Sonia doesn't owe Nick anything like the kind of consideration she's given TO SOMEONE WHO TOLD HER HE DIDN'T LIKE HER. "But they're legally married!" Fuck off, "experts": you don't have to spend time with people who tell you to your face that they don't like you, I don't care how married you are."

Amen.  

Edited October 29, 2016 by film noire