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All Episodes Talk: All Rise


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Since I'd just read on TWoP about the fakeness of the cat-smashed-via-TV case, I immediately thought fakers!! when "Mateo" Kates, Louise Chen and Imogen Eddington presented their very convoluted case. Same hippy-dippy fashions/hair styles, semi-stoned demeanor, etc. As for that "commune", it appears that the group might live in the same art gallery/studio/performance in LA called The Hive where they show their work. (Somehow you just *knew* they were all artists, right?)

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Today's Psycho Supermodel Girlfriend sure was a basket case, that dweeb that was out of her league and lacked a psychodar got his 3 yr restraining order after she beat him up, then switched to Victoria's Secret seduction mode, only to beat him up again when the scheme didn't pan out.

 

Tijuana Catfish Revenge was so obvious, of course the defendants got a "girl" to respond to his Facebook car ad, and they showed up to rough the plaintiff up instead.  That should have been settled in 5 minutes, tops.

 

The dog case was boring because the defendant pled the fifth (snooze!). She paid $500 of the $750 that she agreed to pay, and the plaintiff was out of line asking for way more than the difference because Interest!

 

A mouthy "witness" kicked out, such a treat.  Thanks JJ.  JJ always wins.

Edited by Toaster Strudel
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Couldn't stand the defendant in the Soccer Dog Fight case. I thought JJ was going to smack her when she wouldn't answer if the Animal Control fine was paid.

 

RE: TJ Catfish Revenge. I'm thinking "Dude....you're blocked from that girl's Facebook and you still hang around 5 minutes trying to contact her?" As soon as he saw he was blocked and couldn't get in touch with her, his first thought should have been "set up". Second thought should have been "run"

 

I like how everyone has a crow bar, too. Deodorant, check. Brush teeth, check. Money, check. Crowbar, check.

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A mouthy "witness" kicked out, such a treat.  Thanks JJ.  JJ always wins.

I loved it.

"I think it's really funny that he's here..."

"GET OUT!"

 

JJ called her Chatty Cathy and she said "My name isn't Cathy." I don't know if people don't know what she's referring to, or if they think they are being funny but even if you never heard the expression, can't you tell it's an expression? Saying "My name isn't Cathy" just makes you look like a dumdum.

 

Olivia Wilde in Glasses was so anxious to talk over JJ, she said that if she was calling him, he should have the records, then seconds later says she doesn't have any records.

 

What kind of people just move a stranger into their house? Who moves in with some girl they just started dating/sleeping with? Then it's such a shock when it blows up in their faces. I guess the youngsters aren't watching Dateline.  

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The dog case was boring because the defendant pled the fifth (snooze!).

 

The dog case was personally of interest to us because we had a shiba inu for just shy of 16 years.  Even though we loved him oodles and miss him even though he has been gone for almost 4 years, we know it's not a breed for everyone even though they are extremely popular right now as an Internet meme. You need to be in charge so they know you are 'alpha',  Also it's a breed that you never ever let off lead when out in the open. They have a very high prey drive and will either run away (and they are extremely fast) or they will look for something to hunt, birds, rodents, small animals.  They are small dogs but they have big hearts and egos.

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Frankly, i'm waiting for the day when JJ's rhetoric question of " Are you a moron?!?" elicits the reply "I don't see what religion has to do with it!"

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(edited)

JJ called her Chatty Cathy and she said "My name isn't Cathy." I don't know if people don't know what she's referring to, or if they think they are being funny but even if you never heard the expression, can't you tell it's an expression? Saying "My name isn't Cathy" just makes you look like a dumdum.

 

I actually thought that Mouth wasn't being smart-alecky but that she honestly believed JJ had forgotten that her name was "Daria" and not Cathy. Makes me feel old when common expressions of my youth fly right over the heads of folks today. "Chatty Cathy" should be added to this list (if we're not allowed to post links here, then please, Mr. Mod, delete and accept my apologies):  http://mentalfloss.com/article/55750/origins-8-nearly-obsolete-phrases

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited by Ouisch
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Another mouthy witness thrown out!

Judge Judy drinking the sacred water! 

Byrd says to leave the paperwork, we'll get it back to you. So if they get their stuff back, why do they have to leave it?

The roommates were funny, because they were so clueless. Harmless though. Good luck to you!

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Byrd says to leave the paperwork, we'll get it back to you.

Oh that guy was cray-cray - locking the guy behind the fence because of some marks left on his rickety old fence by a lawn mower. Can I just say I'm SOOO happy he's not my neighbor. The defendant looked like he was going to burst into flame most of the case but in my distraction I kept wondering what kind of hair spray the lady defendant got her hair to look all Sister-Wife-ly like that. 

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The apartment lady, who looked like a prim librarian from circa 1974? When asked how she found the apartment, she started off by saying she was having an affair "on my husband". When hubby got the boot for being a loud mouthed asshole, I kind of understood.

 

"Jimmie" the fence fanatic is a lunatic. Must be that short man syndrome thing going on. Jimmie? STFU, 'kay?

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(edited)

That fenced looked worse than my 25 year old fence!  All Jimmie needed is one nail and a hammer!  Get out of my courtroom, fool.

 

The defendant was glaring from below, his eyes mere slits, like they were about to light up like in Terminator.

Edited by Toaster Strudel
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I was thinking The Omen lol. Or Children of the Corn.

 

What did JJ say at the beginning of the car scrape/sick baby case? That she was going to go slow because of special circumstances? I thought there was an issue with the mom, but then JJ proceeded to rip her apart. 

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I was confused about the Sick Baby Mama case. The guy hit her from the rear. Isn't that pretty much an automatic given that it's the defendant's fault? Or was it because she was driving erratically?  

 

 

The defendant was glaring from below, his eyes mere slits, like they were about to light up like in Terminator.

Maybe he was going to look up and blow the courtroom sky high or flames would shoot out of his head or something. That said I would NEVER be on a board of an HOA. I live in Florida (land of crazy people) and they keep trying to get me to join the board but it's cases like this that keep me safely ensconced in my house watching Judge Judy instead of venturing out to their meetings. No thanks, no crazy Jimmies in my future. 

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Or was it because she was driving erratically?

 

Yes. I'm sure every time she craned her neck to turn and look at the baby, she started drifting and then probably suddenly corrected erratically. The defendant no doubt hit her during one of her drifts when the rear end of the car was over the line in their lane.

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JJ really had it in for the blond woman that worked the system with her serial baby daddies by locking out the boyfriend, who smashed the door, and claimed abuse while the guy hadn't touched her.

 

Rightly so, too.

 

JJ was so incensed, she actually continued to rave at the weirdly smiling blonde on her own way out!

Edited by Toaster Strudel
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That was because blondie laughed heartily when JJ found in favor of the plaintiff.  JJ let her know that using the system, and putting a child in the middle, was not funny.  It was RIDICULOUS.

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JJ was so incensed, she actually continued to rave at the weirdly smiling blonde on her own way out!

 

Not a usual thing for JJ to do.

 

I think  JJ took Blondie's constant grinning/smirks as body language admissions of her scamming the system.

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Basically basically basically: Basically, basically basically basically.  Basically: "basically!  basically!".  Basically... basically basically $basically.00.  basically@basically.com, basically!  Basically?  Basically!!!!

 

Basically... this guy never watched the show ever.  Unless it was his mastermind plan to basically lose his case.

 

Buzzed Bus Rape Drop: Leaving a drunk, possibly underage woman on the side of the street at 2:30 AM? WTF was the wench that organized this well-watered event for her underage alcoholic-in-training son thinking?  Oh yeah, she was drunk herself and having a drunken bar brawl on the bus!  Thank you JJ for not letting this idiot off the hook without a good dressing down.

 

Jessie Lame Horse: I don't get why people want horses.  If you want a pet to ride, get a bicycle with a basket and put Toto in it.

Edited by Toaster Strudel
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Buzzed Bus Rape Drop: Leaving a drunk, possibly underage woman on the side of the street at 2:30 AM? WTF was the wench that organized this well-watered event for her underage alcoholic-in-training son thinking?  Oh yeah, she was drunk herself and having a drunken bar brawl on the bus!  Thank you JJ for not letting this idiot off the hook without a good dressing down.

Basically this case was basically from Michigan and depending on the time of the year, they basically could have dropped a drunk girl off in the middle of nowhere on a cold winter's night basically. Of course, I think basically it's very creepy to go drinking with your adult kids basically. And basically who rents a party bus WHEN YOU'RE 20 for all your family basically? Why it's basically all your alcoholic relatives! but we know the defendant was basically sober during the entire night because basically he's a minor and we all know he was the ONLY ONE basically that didn't drink. 

 

Oh man, I've basically totally annoyed myself. Forgive me. . . carry on. . . 

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Another mouthy witness thrown out!

Judge Judy drinking the sacred water! 

Byrd says to leave the paperwork, we'll get it back to you. So if they get their stuff back, why do they have to leave it?

The roommates were funny, because they were so clueless. Harmless though. Good luck to you!

 

I think they are made to leave the paperwork and other things for the halterviews. The producers probably don't want people to be rustling papers and doing anything but answering the halterview questions and looking at the cameras, so they leave everything in the courtroom. (And it cuts down on people trying to flash their evidence in the halterviews too).

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Basically basically basically: Basically, basically basically basically.  Basically: "basically!  basically!".  Basically... basically basically $basically.00.  basically@basically.com, basically!  Basically?  Basically!!!!

 

Basically... this guy never watched the show ever.  Unless it was his mastermind plan to basically lose his case.

 

 

Did you hear the audience titter after about the twentieth "basically"?

 

How about Mr. Basically Kaszmarek's wife/girlfriend who kept raising her hand and shouted out toward the end of the case? Then she basically reamed Basically out on TV…"You need to speak up!!"

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Mr. Ouisch said "He's gotta be doing that on purpose!" after the 20th 'basically' out of that guy's mouth. I wonder if he really talks like that all the time - much like the folks who like can't get through like two words without saying "like".

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Today's repeat episode was the charming and lovely Meesha Hill, third year ! LAW STUDENT! who bleached her ex-boyfriend in his bed and keyed his car because he failed to repay a $580 loan.

The ex-boyfriend might have been a bit of a flake, but I thought he was quite easy on the eyes. How Sourfaced Meesha attracted him in the first place was a mystery to me.

Did JJ ask her what law school she was attending? I missed that.

"Preponderance of a doubt", indeed! "Well, in Texas it is", said Ms. Hill.

Edited by Intocats
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Regarding the woman who was hit by a car, why was she trying to say that it wasn't raining when it happened? She admitted in the halterview it was. It wouldn't make a difference legally, so I'm not sure why she tried to say that.

 

The guy was suing her for damaging his car after he hit her on a crosswalk. Amazing. 

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I really liked seeing JJ interviewing the kid during the rock throwing/ damaged car case. You can really see why she was considered such a good judge in family court.

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I couldn't believe he tried to sue her for damaging his car. She was in the crosswalk. Last year I was a school crossing guard with a bright orange vest and a stop sign and I still almost got hit on numerous occasions. People need to pay attention. And of corse he didn't have insurance.

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JJ was preempted in our area yesterday for weather coverage, of all things! BOTH episodes!! All for an hour of Doppler radar weather maps tracking tornadoes that might hit. What happened to the days when the city blew the sirens when a funnel cloud was spotted and that was that? 

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Oh Ouisch I feel your pain!  I missed Mr Basically last week for the same reason.  It's not like there aren't a 100 places to find a radar.  Our local Fox channel used to show the missing JJs late in the night after the storm has passed but not anymore.

Does anyone know a free place to catch recent JJ epis?

Edited by zillabreeze
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JJ ignores the law again.

 

Prior offers which are not completed are not admissible.  How many times did Wapner harp on this fact?  What matters is how to make a victim "whole."

 

Today, you have a finding that the defendant did damage and made unauthorized use, who also agreed to make installment payments.  So, he did it and he admitted he did it.  All that is left is to assess damages.

 

Plaintiff had work done and had to give up her car to do so.  She is absolutely entitled to reasonable rental car costs.  No brainer.  JJ decides to rely upon an "agreement" which the defendant abrogated.  Joke.

 

She tried to screw over the GF of the felon for the value of the TV claimed.   She had the receipt!  He did not.  In fact, he had zero documentary evidence of anything.  JJ also berated the GF defendant saying the cops would have come out even after the felon had left the premises.  She was trippin' again.  Cops do NOT come out for a domestic unless bodily harm was already done, or the danger is still present.  

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A Judge Judy three-fer! What a treat!

Wow, is it my imagination, but did Devon Dionne (in the first case whose house sitter damaged her car and spilled Devon's wine all over the couch) and whiny roommate (third case) Caroline Kindred "your honor, the other girl used my bathroom so I moved out" look like long lost sisters?

The car registration case...what a nightmare! In California we can't take off our license plates, but we can send in a bill of sale form to the DMV. The last time I sold a car I sent mine via registered mail, for this very reason. I'm glad JJ read the defendant the riot act.

Edited by Intocats
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Oh, my goodness...Katherine and Delaney. That case was all kinds of phony. I was surprised that the case was about a vet bill instead of stilettos and a stripper pole.

Boy is in WAY over his head.

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I don't know what happened there, I was in part distracted by wanting to punch the plaintiff's smug smile off her face.  Maybe JJ knew they slept at the same hotel last night, hence her conclusion that they wanted their vet bill paid for.

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I think they are made to leave the paperwork and other things for the halterviews. The producers probably don't want people to be rustling papers and doing anything but answering the halterview questions and looking at the cameras, so they leave everything in the courtroom. (And it cuts down on people trying to flash their evidence in the halterviews too).

 

A few fluttering pages in the hallterview  wouldn't be NEARLY as distracting as that melee at the little swinging gate when people are halfway down the aisle and Byrd drags them back to deposit their papers on the table.  It's such a silly thing to insist upon.

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I don't know what happened there, I was in part distracted by wanting to punch the plaintiff's smug smile off her face.  Maybe JJ knew they slept at the same hotel last night, hence her conclusion that they wanted their vet bill paid for.

Oh get thee out of MAH head! She looked like she was trying to audition for some MTV reality show. And she was thinking she was all that and a bag of Doritos and it made her look like an idiot. I guess normal sane people don't go to Judge Judy and laugh hysterically because we don't want to look like total morons. I was hoping JJ was going to find a way to slap her verbally and wipe the smirk off her stooopid face. 

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Wow, is it my imagination, but did Devon Dionne (in the first case whose house sitter damaged her car and spilled Devon's wine all over the couch) and whiny roommate (third case) Caroline Kindred "your honor, the other girl used my bathroom so I moved out" look like long lost sisters?

 

 

I think it was a the red hair. But one of them needed her roots touched up.

 

 

The car registration case...what a nightmare! In California we can't take off our license plates, but we can send in a bill of sale form to the DMV. The last time I sold a car I sent mine via registered mail, for this very reason. I'm glad JJ read the defendant the riot act.

 

Wait a sec. I sell you my car. Its license plate is 123 ABDC. You're stuck with those license plates?

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Oh, my goodness...Katherine and Delaney. That case was all kinds of phony.

Wasn't it? I think these Z-list famewhores are just cooking up schemes (a la the "cat killer") to get on national TV and humiliate themselves for a couple hundred dollars and a free trip to LA for a comp'd dinner. And this is at least the second or third case in a month where the case has been a made-for-TV sham.

 

Methinks JJ's "truth machine" is as obsolete as a BetaMax player.

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(edited)

Yeah, I think the plaintiff's mom declined to watch the video because she couldn't bear seeing her precious snowflake getting his ass handed to him again. "Fisted up" devolved pretty rapidly to "slap and flail." Not that either of those little dicksmacks were anywhere near sympathetic. How many days did all this hat-slapping, fist-clenching, teacher-intervening go on, overall? I pity that teacher, whatever subject he or she probably never got a chance to pound into those idiots' heads. (Is our children learning?)

 

*Edited because I do too know where the plural possessive apostrophe goes. In my post about modern US edumacation.

Edited by pagooey
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