Jump to content

Type keyword(s) to search

Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!


Message added by CM-CrispMtAir,

Shout out to everyone participating in the conversation about Jill’s miscarriage/stillbirth. You’re navigating a difficult topic with respect and thoughtfulness and your contributions are kind, considerate, constructive and informative. 

Thank you. 💚💚

  • Reply
  • Start Topic

Recommended Posts

With their 501c3 they're able to use that "non-profit" in their application for a longer permit. They will also count all their travel expensives as operating fees. They'll have a 1200sqft rental and probably count 1000sqft as home office. Jill and Derick are learning from JB.

  • Love 3
Link to comment

Honestly, I think it makes sense to do the surgery and braces right before leaving on a mission trip. Derick turned 26 this year and will no longer be able to remain on his mother's health insurance after December 31. Not sure what sort of benefits he had with Wal Mart, but I'm willing to be his mother's insurance is superior. Better to get major stuff out of the way before using the insurance, and the surgery was probably quite expensive. Braces aren't that huge of a deal if the surgery has fixed the major issue and it's fairly easy to transfer to a different orthodontist. Ten second Google search brought up a couple in San Salvador that have been reviewed or recommended by American expats.

In short, I think the surgery had to do with realizing that his really good insurance was going to run out. You should see the crap my younger siblings have rushed to do when they realized it was the end of mom and dad's insurance.

I don't think you get to stay on your parents insurance when you get married. I may be wrong, but you're no longer a dependent when you're married and claiming a dependent of your own on your taxes.

  • Love 5
Link to comment

I don't think you get to stay on your parents insurance when you get married. I may be wrong, but you're no longer a dependent when you're married and claiming a dependent of your own on your taxes.

For a few years now, with the ACA, young adults may stay on their parents insurance til age 26, even if living independently. This coverage is not extended to their spouse or kids.

  • Love 5
Link to comment

I think Derick had the work done because he was appearing on TV. Before they didn't do it because it didn't matter, but after the success with their own children and Anna, this was sort of a "gift" for Derick.

 

It may have had something to do with growth too. Men generally haven't finished growing until their early twenties, and with Derick's time in Nepal this may have been the first opportunity he had to do the surgery. Probably coming to the end of his health insurance, whether through Wally World or Mom played a part too.

  • Love 2
Link to comment

They will get to take a lot of deductions unless they get flagged by the IRS, then they will be checked every year. So if they are smart, they won't go overboard the first year. I actually imagine JB knows this. Most small business owners do.

Link to comment

I currently have Invisalign braces; I change out the aligners every 2 weeks and get 3-4 months of aligners in advance. He may have the same, making less trips to the orthodontist.

  • Love 1
Link to comment

I don't think you get to stay on your parents insurance when you get married. I may be wrong, but you're no longer a dependent when you're married and claiming a dependent of your own on your taxes.

Married or not, in school or not, with dozens of children or not, ACA allows children to stay on a parent's plan until 26. But it's just Derick, not his spouse or child.  

Link to comment

In the video Jim Bob and Michelle said they would be visiting Jill and Derrick. Why? Will they bring any of the children? Who pays? Does he hope that will make TLC film? Just seems weird to "visit" (they did NOT say join them) people doing missionary work.

IIRC, (don't want to watch video again to check) when MEchelle said they'll visit, the younger kids looked so excited like they were leaving tomorrow. I really feel sorry for James. He found a new buddy in Derick & now has to watch his second set of parents leave him.

Does anyone know what type of living facilities Jerick will have? Do they get a separate place or is it a communal setting with other missionaries, sharing kitchen/bathrooms?

I'm still laughing reading all the comments about the chalkboard. I hope it was well packed & arrived safely. I can picture a suitcase loaded with their prized possessions - the chalkboard & plenty of pee (Jesus) sticks.

  • Love 2
Link to comment

I currently have Invisalign braces; I change out the aligners every 2 weeks and get 3-4 months of aligners in advance. He may have the same, making less trips to the orthodontist.

No, he has clear "traditional" braces. 

  • Love 2
Link to comment

No, he has clear "traditional" braces. 

Yes, you can clearly see the posts on his teeth. It's not invisalign, which would be easier. Considering he needed jaw surgery, his case was likely too complex for Invisalign; they only work for easy cases.

  • Love 2
Link to comment

Clearly I'm in the minority (and I don't care), but I was thinking maybe he "hurried up" and had the surgery and already had the braces planned BECAUSE they were leaving the country. I guess I think this because in that epi shot in early May, there was the teaser about them telling the family some big news.

  • Love 3
Link to comment

I also think it had to be some time in the planning because the paperwork for these things takes time. Having just emigrated myself, it's an enormous undertaking. Even if they are just going for three months on a tourist visa, it's a lot of effort. If they did a work visa, this took at least six months. And political connections or not, setting up a 501c takes a little time too.

I don't think they could have managed this in less than three months. And that's being incredibly time crunched, assuming they are going for three months and are mostly just helping out and aren't really serious. Anything bigger than that and I say six months minimum.

  • Love 5
Link to comment

I think they had it planned before the scandal and Grand Midwifery Goddess Jill thought that Anna would be delivering with a real CNM in DC.  And although the CNM would not be as competent as Jill, Anna would have someone to deliver her baby. #majorsnark

 

Can we please have a snark emoticon?  lol

  • Love 8
Link to comment
(edited)

I'm still naively optimistic enough to think that long term to them actually means at least a year, with the only impediment being that El Salvador doesn't appear to have religious worker visas so they'd likely need to go on visa runs every three months.  These things are usually fairly simple (I've known people who have lived in some countries for nearly a decade by crossing the border every 3-6 months to get new visa stamps.  Can't do this anymore in the EU) but I imagine well known figures could run into trouble.  I mean, wherever these two end up, they've publicly stated they are there as missionaries.  

 

Of course, these people will probably further disappoint me by returning in a month and calling that a long term mission assignment.  

Edited by bluebonnet
  • Love 2
Link to comment

Does anyone know for sure what surgery Derrick had. I apologize if it was mentioned already. I'm reading jaw surgery in somree posts. When I was told that I might need surgery for my misalignment problem, it involved my jaw being wired shut for six weeks minimum. I chose to have two teeth removed and braces for five years.

Link to comment

She will possibly still be in a Latino country where Jesus is a fairly common name.

That is why I picked it! LOL When I first came to America I lived in an area called Logan Square in Chicago. A mix of American and Latino neighborhood. I knew plenty of boys named Jesus.

  • Love 4
Link to comment

Does anyone know for sure what surgery Derrick had. I apologize if it was mentioned already. I'm reading jaw surgery in somree posts. When I was told that I might need surgery for my misalignment problem, it involved my jaw being wired shut for six weeks minimum. I chose to have two teeth removed and braces for five years.

. I think Derick had something similar, Morg. IIRC, he had his lower jaw resectioned and his jaw wired shut for awhile right after Jill had Izzy. Pain all around for everybody. Nobody saw him for a little bit, and when we did, he had braces.
  • Love 2
Link to comment
(edited)

We know the Duggars have gone on quite a few mission trips that were never filmed. I figure they consider this part of their "tithe." And I've never known any short term mission trips that were tax deductible. Am I wrong about that? Support to missionaries doing something long term, yes. But going and spending two weeks somewhere - no.

 

I hope you're wrong because I'm <ahem> delayed in filing my taxes, but I was told the donation I made to a short term mission trip would be deductible. (ETA: by short term I mean a 2-week trip my brother-in-law did)

Edited by NikSac
Link to comment

They do seem to be deductible. I just never belonged to churches that did or advertised this. Our donations to it were, but we never put forth that those goes going were. Evidently the paperwork is extensive, and this was the reason.

Link to comment

I think this was planned time ago. They probably "purposed it" as a story line for the show and a fun, free trip (paid for by TLC) by them... Now being dramatically cut short because TLC is probably not filming this and JB did not plan and won't pay it with his holy $$$.... 

  • Love 2
Link to comment
(edited)

I have no idea why that would even be a thing he'd need to worry about. Again, not a doctor and only going by what I can see in photos, but his bite looks properly aligned so breaking bones seems unlikely. But San Salvador does have doctors and dentists so there really isn't a huge concern with that.

To me this doesn't look finished

152fg9x.jpg

Edited by Kokapetl
Link to comment

She will possibly still be in a Latino country where Jesus is a fairly common name.

But then the name would be pronounced Hey-Zeus which will lose them points in the World's Bestest Christian competition they launched with the Israel David moniker.

  • Love 6
Link to comment

He does need the braces to get the teeth aligned properly.  It looks like a quarter tooth off on the top.  They can easily move that around.  The orthodontist did an entire tooth move on my daughter with braces only. 

  • Love 1
Link to comment

But then the name would be pronounced Hey-Zeus which will lose them points in the World's Bestest Christian competition they launched with the Israel David moniker.

They may not ever realise Haysoos = Jesus.

  • Love 6
Link to comment

. I think Derick had something similar, Morg. IIRC, he had his lower jaw resectioned and his jaw wired shut for awhile right after Jill had Izzy. Pain all around for everybody. Nobody saw him for a little bit, and when we did, he had braces.

 

Little Izzy is going to make some orthodontist very, very rich in the future. 

  • Love 3
Link to comment
(edited)

Looks fine to me.  Compare this to pre pictures and jaw and bite alignment are now centered.  There is another picture on one of the instagrams where you can see his bottom teeth and get an even better look at how the alignment has moved to center whereas before his top jaw was smaller and bottom jaw to the left. Not sure what else you could possibly think would need to be done.  Of course, there might need to be some general orthodontic work to deal with basic placement of teeth, but that would just require braces rather than surgery.

 

Keep in mind, I'm not making a judgement on his aesthetic appearance.  I'm not determining whether or not he looks better before or after.  I really don't care.  Thinking he needs more work because you don't like his face is a different sort of discussion that I'm not going to participate in because I'm just not that sort of person.  I'm merely using my own experience with oral and maxillofacial surgery along with my eyes to make a fairly uneducated guess (I'm not a doctor, not even a webmd 'graduate') about his bite before and after.  

 

Furthermore, even if he needs continued work, he's not going to the gods damned moon.  Health care does exist in other countries, even underdeveloped ones.  Let's stop with the xenophobia, acting as though the US is the only place one can see a doctor.  

Edited by bluebonnet
  • Love 12
Link to comment

Exactly how many knuckles are supposed to be in an adult male's thumb, anyone know?

Am I seeing things, or is her nail polish all chipped and applied sloppily?  Maybe I need to clean my glasses....

  • Love 2
Link to comment
(edited)

Derick looks sickly.

The kids look very rough.

JB looks like he gained 15 lbs and hasn't had a good night's sleep since Josh's little secret spilled.

MEchelle looks like a hot mess..

 

What were they thinking? Why did they have to place an emphasis on being forgiven for their mistakes?

 

Thoughts on the video:

 

The kids all lined up and faced the front during the prayer, as if they were being filmed for the show. I guess some things are ingrained in them now.

There were only 11 kids there, unless I counted wrong.  Where's everyone else?

What happened to all the weight Michelle lost (from that earlier pic of her at the walmart history spot)? Maybe that was photoshop at it's best?

 

What the heck was this all about, anyway? Why did they do this?  Do all families film themselves saying good bye, and performing for a non-existent audience?

Edited by OhioMom
  • Love 5
Link to comment

But then the name would be pronounced Hey-Zeus which will lose them points in the World's Bestest Christian competition they launched with the Israel David moniker.

The only thing I can think of right now is the clip from Family Feud where the question is "Give me a boy's name that starts with H" and one of the contestants replied "Jose".

http://youtu.be/3Tcy614ogms

  • Love 4
Link to comment
(edited)

I'm no maxillofacial surgeon, but Derick doesn't look "finished" to me either - much less anything approximating healthy or OK.  He looks unkempt, exhausted, emaciated and pale. (And I say this as a woman whose college boyfriends tended toward thin, bearded, tortured Irish poet types, so I know of what I speak.) I can't put my finger on exactly what befell his teeth and jaw, but as many have commented re Josie, he "ain't right." 

 

The lifeless eyes are most alarming. This is NOT the happy go lucky guy Jill met in Nepal.  I keep thinking of the original Planet of the Apes, when Charlton Heston sees his fellow astronaut (rendered tabula rasa due to a lobotomy) and screams "You've cut out his brain, you bloody baboons!" Is it possible Charlton Heston knew the Duggars??

Edited by HundFan
  • Love 12
Link to comment

That is why I picked it! LOL When I first came to America I lived in an area called Logan Square in Chicago. A mix of American and Latino neighborhood. I knew plenty of boys named Jesus.

Wow, small world Fuzzysox, I grew up in Logan Square. Back when it was German/Irish/Polish and Jesus was only found at St. Sylvester church.

  • Love 1
Link to comment

I once worked with a guy who got shot in the face in a hunting "accident" (some yahoo fired at movement, and hit my friend in the truck he was a passenger in as his group, having bagged their deer, were heading home.  never got the guy).  He had many many surgeries, and in the end could talk and eat and breath and so on, but his lower jaw remained deformed, so he always had a short beard to help camouflage it.  Derrick looks like he has that exact same beard.

 

As to the eyes, all the Duggars with the exception of the privileged ones (JB, Michelle, and Josh), the 3-Ms (raised in a different area code, which sadly has ended), and the smallest of the "littles" (who are feral), all of the Duggars have either dead eyes or very haunted eyes.  

 

Derrick has been assimilated.  

  • Love 7
Link to comment

I read today that this "mission trip" may only last one month. Given that SOS has missions going on through about 8/1 that the Dillards could oversee while Mike oversees trips that are more established. I don't see that there is permanent need for them, given how primitive the headquarters were 6 months ago. Schadt's permanent residence is in Florida, and his family seems to live there fulltime. 

 

I just don't see SOS as a permanent ministry opportunity for anyone at this time, but hey, the Dillards will bring more attention to the soccer ball, lollipop, and nail painting kids they ship down there a couple times a year now. 

  • Love 7
Link to comment
(edited)

I'm no maxillofacial surgeon, but Derick doesn't look "finished" to me either - much less anything approximating healthy or OK.  He looks unkempt, exhausted, emaciated and pale. (And I say this as a woman whose college boyfriends tended toward thin, bearded, tortured Irish poet types, so I know of what I speak.) I can't put my finger on exactly what befell his teeth and jaw, but as many have commented re Josie, he "ain't right." 

 

The lifeless eyes are most alarming. This is NOT the happy go lucky guy Jill met in Nepal.  I keep thinking of the original Planet of the Apes, when Charlton Heston sees his fellow astronaut (rendered tabula rasa due to a lobotomy) and screams "You've cut out his brain, you bloody baboons!" Is it possible Charlton Heston knew the Duggars??

Of course, and this is just looking at it all realistically with all the information we know or assume, Derick sort of looks like a dude who is a new parent to an infant, has recently had what we speculate is serious surgery that would be painful and would alter his eating habits significantly during recovery, has been preparing for an international move, and in that photo, is on a weekend work trip.  I mean, every person I know who has an infant at home sort of looks exhausted and lifeless.  My own experiences with jaw surgery led to significant weight loss and a deadish look and took a while to recover from that.  Plus, it can change one's look and Derick's now correct alignment has altered his appearance, which may or may not further change when all of the swelling goes down and the teeth move into correct position.  Traveling, especially for work, is just tiring.  I figured all of this would be obvious, but maybe not.  

 

Now the fashion choices are another matter entirely.  It's not my taste and I agree, that long hair and scraggly beard could use some work.  

Edited by bluebonnet
  • Love 5
Link to comment

About Derick and his face and changes...I had orthodontic work done as an adult (I was 49 when my braces were put on) due to some serious bite issues (due to my X dislocating my jaw...) The shape of my face has changed slightly. Its enough to be noticeable in pictures from before to after...pretty much any orthodontic work will change the shape of the lower face...

  • Love 3
Link to comment

I read today that this "mission trip" may only last one month. Given that SOS has missions going on through about 8/1 that the Dillards could oversee while Mike oversees trips that are more established. I don't see that there is permanent need for them, given how primitive the headquarters were 6 months ago. Schadt's permanent residence is in Florida, and his family seems to live there fulltime. 

 

I just don't see SOS as a permanent ministry opportunity for anyone at this time, but hey, the Dillards will bring more attention to the soccer ball, lollipop, and nail painting kids they ship down there a couple times a year now. 

Imagine (again) the mental gymnastics involved in quitting a solid, reliable job with a Fortune 500 company in an area that has a dearth of them to go on a one-month "missions trip". While supporting a wife that will never work outside the home, a new baby, and I'm guessing Dilly #2. And having undergone what appears to be a significant surgical procedure that will require expensive follow-up. Of course, I'm sure all the bills will be taken care of via the "Dillard Family Ministries", which does not have a mission statement or any information about their actual "ministry".

 

I think I'm getting a headache.

  • Love 8
Link to comment

I think this will, one way or another, be at least a 2 year trip.  SOS may have longer term missions planned, or another mission may be involved, but no way would you quit your job (I believe he was fired, and pretty close to the one year mark where an employer can freely say, it just didn't work out, bye) and go to the trouble of a corporate filing and uprooting everything for a lousy month or so away.

  • Love 1
Link to comment

I don't think it's a month either, because of the comment about Israel's clothes. It's a very telling point, and one I worried about, and I moved to a first world country. But buying clothes for my own rapidly growing daughter was a big concern. An infant (especially an atypically sized one to his age - my son was like that) would have had my planning brain buzzing overtime.

On the OTHER hand, if it's only a scam, that's too small of a detail to pick up on. That's a real EX-pat kind of detail. That doesn't mean it's a long long time (and of course we can all get clothes everywhere. It's just a typical first time expat kind of thing.). But I'm betting this isn't just a few months.

Link to comment

I seem to remember that people used to have their jaws wired shut for weight loss purposes. I have no idea if this still goes on but it sounds barbaric.

Yes, it is still used as a weight-loss measure.
Link to comment

I think their plan is a long term mission; 1 - 2 years. They talked about this when they were courting. I wonder how long they will make it though. I consider myself a low maintenance gal, yet when my kids were little it wasn't always easy, and in addition to my hubbs I had extended family around. 

 

If they are in a place without the basics we take for granted such as indoor plumbing, electricity, clean water etc, I guess Jill might want to bail or at least take many extended trips home.  But who knows.

Link to comment

Some men can pull off the Homeless Hipster Scruff look. Derrick is not one of them. He looks dirty and ill. Trimmed up brows, but then that matted, greasy looking hair that looks like one of the Lost Girls cut it with safety scissors. Scruffy beard, circles under the eyes, pasty skin. He looks ill.

 

When a person is naturally thin and also sallow, that whole ragamuffin street urchin styling is not a good idea. Seriously spend $8 at Master Cuts or have someone show Jill how to cut hair. He looks terrible.


I think their plan is a long term mission; 1 - 2 years. They talked about this when they were courting. I wonder how long they will make it though. I consider myself a low maintenance gal, yet when my kids were little it wasn't always easy, and in addition to my hubbs I had extended family around. 

 

If they are in a place without the basics we take for granted such as indoor plumbing, electricity, clean water etc, I guess Jill might want to bail or at least take many extended trips home.  But who knows.

Honestly, I think they'll be fine as long as the money and the help keep coming in. As much as Jill dithers on about baby this, baby that, she (like her mother) seems like the type who will pawn her baby off on anyone and call it a blessing. Also, this isn't 1850 and they're not going to the uncharted wilds of New Guinea or whatever. They'll have a constant stream of visitors and will be Skyping left and right. 

  • Love 5
Link to comment
(edited)

Some men can pull off the Homeless Hipster Scruff look. Derrick is not one of them. When a person is naturally thin and also sallow, that whole ragamuffin street urchin styling is not a good idea.

. But right now, for a guy roughly his age (ESPECIALLY the thin, sallow ones), that is the GO-TO look. Both my nephews have that going on and I am not a fan. I'll be so glad when they grow out of it!

I'm kinda wondering if we aren't all crowding in on the "he looks terrible" wagon BECAUSE he's left this country to go be a missionary and that's not our idea of how a missionary should look. (I know it's not mine!). If I'm a starving orphan in wherevertheheck they went, I might be a little frightened of Derick. I know his intentions are good, but he does look rough. Seems like the parent org would have said "do you think you could clean your look up a little?"

My one nephew, who is skinny skinny skinny, pasty faced (pale as a ghost), has that icky "can't grow a beard but like the scragglies" thing going on, and (HORRORS!!!) talks in that flat monotone "I don't care what you think" voice... Had ENORMOUS trouble finding a job out of high school - and to be honest, the bar was pretty dang low. He couldn't get on at a fast food restaurant that my friend OWNS, because his whole look and demeanor say "whatever, dude". I sat down with him and explained (from an ex-HR perspective) how he needed to look and present himself to get more positive results. His response? (In that IRRITATING mono): I don't know what you're talking about. Shaggy on the cartoon at least MOVES like he cares...

I know Derick isn't like that, really (I hope!!!). But his current look is screaming unkempt, and don't care. That's what bugs me about it anyway, but...that's just me.

Edited by Happyfatchick
  • Love 3
Link to comment

I think their plan is a long term mission; 1 - 2 years. They talked about this when they were courting. I wonder how long they will make it though. I consider myself a low maintenance gal, yet when my kids were little it wasn't always easy, and in addition to my hubbs I had extended family around. 

 

If they are in a place without the basics we take for granted such as indoor plumbing, electricity, clean water etc, I guess Jill might want to bail or at least take many extended trips home.  But who knows.

Given that life in developing countries is not as cushy as the U.S. -- water shortages/outages; you don't always have showerheads and often bathe with a bucket etc. -- you'd think Derick would see this as a time to cut his hair short before leaving, not grow it out. If you're going to grow out your hair, you have to tend to it a bit -- use some product etc. to make it look passable. Why not make things easy for right now and just get a buzz cut?

 

As for whether Jill will last -- I highly doubt they are going some place without indoor plumbing. I imagine they will have a toilet and tub of some variety -- it's just that developing countries have electric and water shortages all the time and thus have rolling brownouts/water shut offs often every day. And I've never been to any developing country where you can just use/drink water from the tap like in the U.S. -- there's always a filteration process and if you're not some place where those filters are attached right to the faucets, you are then boiling water every day (multiple times a day) and using that for cooking, drinking etc. It's going to be a pain for her and she's going to have to stay on top of it esp with a baby.

 

Though the nice thing about every developing country is that labor is cheap. That means even middle/lower middle class people have some hired help -- not like the U.S. where only the rich can afford full time hired help bc you have to pay 30-40k if you do it on the up and up. That means Jill will find herself a young girl from the village who can be Iz's nanny; which will be super helpful esp when she's pregnant with no. 2 and doesn't feel like chasing a 1 yr old or when she just wants a break from him. In the best of all scenarios, I'd love for her to find a young woman in her late teens/early 20s who can work for Jill but also become friendly with her -- they can practice Spanish and English w each other; she can tell her what life in those villages is REALLY like and how 99% of people would do ANYTHING for an education; maybe that'll make the light turn on for Jill that there are people in the world who so value an 8th or 12th grade education while my family has schools in their backyard available for free and refuses to use them -- that's effed up.

  • Love 6
Link to comment

Just to point out, Derick's hair is shorter.  That was the whole stalking thing where they realized Jessa's photo was wrong because Derick's hair had been cut since the alive weekend.  

 

I think Jill will probably do well living abroad, but I doubt she's see the light or anything like that.  Missionaries are sort of like that, they see only themselves and what they are selling.  

  • Love 2
Link to comment

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Unfortunately, your content contains terms that we do not allow. Please edit your content to remove the highlighted words below.
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...