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Jessa, Ben and Their Brood: Making a (Diaper) Mountain out of a Mold House


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The Duggars post about politics on social media frequently, but these social media posts are not an invitation to discuss politics here in this forum. This rule extends to Duggar adjacent families, friends, associates etc. Such discussions are a violation of the Politics Policy. 

I understand with recent current events there may be a desire to discuss certain social media postings of those in the Duggar realm as they relate to politics- this is not the place for those discussions. If you believe someone has violated forum rules, report them, do not respond or engage.

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2 hours ago, Zahdii said:

I thought Ben attended at least some classes at his local high school?

I think that was Jeremy.  He was homeschooled k-8 also but switched to public high school in order to play soccer.  (I think)

To my knowledge, Ben was homeschooled k-12.  He made some mention of football in high school.   I remember us talking about  how exactly homeschoolers played team football...not sure if we ever figured out if it was a group of homeschoolers, Ben playing of for the district or Ben playing for a Christian school that takes homeschoolers for some subjects. 

Guinn has recently posted a picture of the kids on a co-op field trip.  Co-ops can be academic, social or a mix.  So Guinn's picture doesn't tell us much other than Guinn is an active mom who has the kids doing things, unlike Michelle who turned on a computer. 

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1 minute ago, Marigold said:

I think that was Jeremy.  He was homeschooled k-8 also but switched to public high school in order to play soccer.  (I think)

To my knowledge, Ben was homeschooled k-12.  He made some mention of football in high school.   I remember us talking about  how exactly homeschoolers played team football...not sure if we ever figured out if it was a group of homeschoolers, Ben playing of for the district or Ben playing for a Christian school that takes homeschoolers for some subjects. 

Guinn has recently posted a picture of the kids on a co-op field trip.  Co-ops can be academic, social or a mix.  So Guinn's picture doesn't tell us much other than Guinn is an active mom who has the kids doing things, unlike Michelle who turned on a computer. 

The Pioneer Woman’s kids played football and soccer, and they were homeschooled.  Maybe it’s a city league like that, or something like AAU.  

I think Ben’s capacity to eat something other than CFA and TTC has already demonstrated Guinn’s advanced parenting style.  I won’t say skills because who knows what bigoted or narrow minded beliefs she exposed her kids to, but her style sure does seem superior to MOTY’s. 

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1 minute ago, Ijustwantsomechips said:

The Pioneer Woman’s kids played football and soccer, and they were homeschooled.  Maybe it’s a city league like that, or something like AAU.  

I think Ben’s capacity to eat something other than CFA and TTC has already demonstrated Guinn’s advanced parenting style.  I won’t say skills because who knows what bigoted or narrow minded beliefs she exposed her kids to, but her style sure does seem superior to MOTY’s. 

Some districts allow homeschoolers to play.  I know quite a few homeschoolers who play football for the district.  Depends on the state.  Depends on the district.  We also have have a large christian school here that takes homeschoolers for basketball. 

I don't know what town Ben is from. We could easily figure out if he played for the district.   College ball is big there, maybe something like that?  

Yes, that's true about the Pioneer Woman's kids...their rural school districts might look for players!  

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21 minutes ago, Sew Sumi said:

The Seewalds lived in Hot Springs during the time Ben was educated at home 

Well that was easy.  Seems Arkansas is very accepting of homeschoolers playing district sports.  I didn't read the fine print but as a homeschooler, I can glance at something and get the basics. 

If Ben played for the school district, it would be cheap and close to home.  Sounds like the most obvious conclusion. 

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5 hours ago, PikaScrewChu said:

Austin is an inconsiderate jerk. I don't know whether he is abusive (I'm not privy to watching their private time) but I don't take Joy and Austin's bickering as playful bickering. It's passive aggressive bickering. He seems generally annoyed with her most of the time.

I don't think Jessa would suffer through a marriage like that. People above are discussing the age difference between Jessa and Ben. That really set the tone for a power imbalance in the relationship. You could argue that the J'Slaves are mentally stunted, but the age difference between Jessa and Ben at the time was a recipe to set up a power imbalance in favor of Jessa. I also suspect that's why Jana isn't married yet, even if I enjoy the conspiracy theories. Jana probably is a boss bitch at this point and couldn't do the meek deferral to her husband.

I'm not really defending Austin's behavior, so much as theorizing why he looks so annoyed - in every segment of them together, Joy looks like a soulless husk and speaks that way as well; I can see how that would be really annoying. Joy being conditioned to submit to men makes every conversation like "OK...what do you (Austin) want? OK we're doing that". Of course Austin looking so serious all the time doesn't help any lighthearted conversation come forth either. Even in the courtship phase, they didn't look very into each other. Some people on this forum have been saying the same thing about Lauren and Josiah, which I must admit I haven't been that observant of either. I don't really see a problem with couples who meet and get married in a really short time period, but it seems like they'd have to be full on crazy about each other - I guess Jinger and Jeremy are the closest thing to that that we've seen on the show.

 

In regards to Jessa and Ben, I think the power imbalance has all to do with their difference in personalities. With the exception of wire-framed glasses wearing Reddit users who watch Rick and Morty and have a wall of Funko Pops in their room (this whole sentence is probably lost on many forum users lol), how common is it for the wife to be the more dominant one in the relationship? Pretty uncommon, I would say. If I were in Ben's shoes, I wouldn't let Jessa be my puppet master - what's the point in having such a H-O-T wife if she doesn't respect you? I doubt she finds him very attractive anymore either, which is ironic, since she's already lost a lot of her luster from years ago and Ben is getting more masculine/handsome (and I say that with my lips on Jessa's rear, so you know it's true!).

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Also, in regards to Counting On going off the air, I think it would more so depend on if the Duggars didn't want to do it anymore. The show still gets 1 million+ viewers per episode and it's very easy/cheap to produce - it may be the most popular show on TLC (Little People Big World is the likely contender), so I don't think the network would get rid of it so easily. Never mind most of the Duggars have no skills and no real income source, so why would they give up such easy money either?

Even if the show went off the air, Jessa could easily just distance herself from the cult (or just not mention anything about it on camera) and start building a YouTube following. As I've already repeated ad nauseam, she is as HOT as that afterlife place she believes in, so she could easily gain a new fanbase just from that, never mind the boost in search ranking she'd have after telling all her Instagram followers to subscribe to her. Judging by the responses she's given to people on Instagram, she has some of that sassy humor that is popular with young people, so she could probably use that well.

I'm already annoyed in advance because I know she's not going to do any of this, despite it being potentially even less work than Counting On is. WHY.

Edited by InternetToughGuy
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16 hours ago, Lunera said:

Kendra was also 17 when she and Joe started to get to know eachother but they waited until she turned 18 to start courting. 

I also think that was too young given how quickly courtship turns into marriage. Granted Kendra and Joe had known of each other for several years before hand but still. 

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1 hour ago, BitterApple said:

 On last night's episode Austin tried to engage Joy in conversation by asking "So what do you think we're having, boy or girl?". Joy responded with a surly "I dunno..." and resumed unpacking the crib. Derelict tried to do the same once with Jill. They were at dinner and he inquired about her goals for the upcoming year and she answered "the same as yours." So yeah, I guess it's hard to be one of those fun, likable couples when one half of the equation has the intellect of a tree stump. 

Which is interesting because I thought Jinger held up her end of the conversation with Jeremy at their anniversary dinner on last night's episode of CO. And Jessa would totally as well - in fact, she would probably be the one asking Ben.

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3 hours ago, InternetToughGuy said:

I'm not really defending Austin's behavior, so much as theorizing why he looks so annoyed - in every segment of them together, Joy looks like a soulless husk and speaks that way as well; I can see how that would be really annoying. Joy being conditioned to submit to men makes every conversation like "OK...what do you (Austin) want? OK we're doing that". Of course Austin looking so serious all the time doesn't help any lighthearted conversation come forth either. Even in the courtship phase, they didn't look very into each other. Some people on this forum have been saying the same thing about Lauren and Josiah, which I must admit I haven't been that observant of either. I don't really see a problem with couples who meet and get married in a really short time period, but it seems like they'd have to be full on crazy about each other - I guess Jinger and Jeremy are the closest thing to that that we've seen on the show.

 

In regards to Jessa and Ben, I think the power imbalance has all to do with their difference in personalities. With the exception of wire-framed glasses wearing Reddit users who watch Rick and Morty and have a wall of Funko Pops in their room (this whole sentence is probably lost on many forum users lol), how common is it for the wife to be the more dominant one in the relationship? Pretty uncommon, I would say. If I were in Ben's shoes, I wouldn't let Jessa be my puppet master - what's the point in having such a H-O-T wife if she doesn't respect you? I doubt she finds him very attractive anymore either, which is ironic, since she's already lost a lot of her luster from years ago and Ben is getting more masculine/handsome (and I say that with my lips on Jessa's rear, so you know it's true!).

Username checks out.

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3 hours ago, BitterApple said:

one half of the equation has the intellect of a tree stump. 

I'd just like to know what you have against tree stumps??  What did the poor trees ever do to you that they deserve to be compared with Duggars???

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It's not their intellect that is the problem, it's their personalities. Neither of them has any curiosity, personal interests, or drive to grow. Joy would probably be satisfied to follow Austin around hammering nails and racking rocks as she was told and it's obvious from Jill's godawful recipes that she barely puts any effort into her social media career. She's pretty much doing whatever Derick expects her to do, but she isn't any better at it now than she was a year ago.

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36 minutes ago, Nysha said:

It's not their intellect that is the problem, it's their personalities. Neither of them has any curiosity, personal interests, or drive to grow. Joy would probably be satisfied to follow Austin around hammering nails and racking rocks as she was told and it's obvious from Jill's godawful recipes that she barely puts any effort into her social media career. She's pretty much doing whatever Derick expects her to do, but she isn't any better at it now than she was a year ago.

I don't see how Jill could have a social media "career" - she's not on TV anymore, has no personality, can't post anything not pertaining to Jesus and is married to someone the whole Duggar family and majority of the Duggar fandom hate. It seems pretty grim for her, especially if she has more kids.

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On August 20, 2018 at 3:44 PM, allonsyalice said:

I mean, I think its impossible to expect someone to be one thing all of the time. I'm not sure that's really how humans work. I can do a solid 1950s style outfit one day and then be in jeans the next. It's what I'm comfortable with, and I think its what Jessa is comfortable with too. I think she's branched out a little, like with those old navy trapeze dresses (sorry, swing dresses are something completely different to me), and she's found different things she wants to wear and thats fine. (also, honestly whats the point of getting dressed if you cant change and experiment with styles?) 

I think Jessa is simply thrifty.  Jinger is being lauded in her thread for wearing a one hundred dollar blouse, and all I can think of is why does she need such expensive clothing.  I've never understood why that's seen as admirable. 

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Have we heard any more talk about Jessa and Ben adopting more kids? I was watching a rerun of the early season of Counting On, and it was interesting to hear that both Jill and Jessa were talking about adopting kids, even with both were pregnant. It's now been about 3-4 years and I haven't heard any more about it unless I missed something. 

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4 minutes ago, CarolMK said:

Have we heard any more talk about Jessa and Ben adopting more kids? I was watching a rerun of the early season of Counting On, and it was interesting to hear that both Jill and Jessa were talking about adopting kids, even with both were pregnant. It's now been about 3-4 years and I haven't heard any more about it unless I missed something. 

They've all been talking about adoption off and on for years. Nothing ever happens. Adopting a child would require substantial effort (Attorney fees! Paperwork to fill out!), plus Gothard is very anti-adoption. I think it's just one of the "this will make me sound like a good person" clichés they keep rattling around in their heads for when they have nothing else to say.

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1 hour ago, Albanyguy said:

They've all been talking about adoption off and on for years. Nothing ever happens. Adopting a child would require substantial effort (Attorney fees! Paperwork to fill out!), plus Gothard is very anti-adoption. I think it's just one of the "this will make me sound like a good person" clichés they keep rattling around in their heads for when they have nothing else to say.

Yep. That's why Jessa and Ben ended up trotting out the storyline for the People cover because Jessa wasn't pregnant yet. It was painfully obvious they expected Jessa to get pregnant just as quickly as Jill when they did that interview for People.

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Jill has 1.6 million followers on her Instagram, that's her social media career. She sucks at it, but for people who are willing to work there is good money to be made. My grandson watches YouTube videos of a little boy named Ryan opening presents and going to different themes parks. I read an article last spring and in the 2-3 years his family has been doing this they've made over $3 million!

Edited by Nysha
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8 hours ago, RedheadZombie said:

I think Jessa is simply thrifty.  Jinger is being lauded in her thread for wearing a one hundred dollar blouse, and all I can think of is why does she need such expensive clothing.  I've never understood why that's seen as admirable. 

I have a feeling that her husband is behind this. He wants her to look very good as his wife...a future Minister’s wife and helpful co-leader of a congregation. Jeremy takes care in his appearance and knows that some people judge you by how you look. 

You can get hundred dollar blouses at a thrift store inexpensively. I know of a good one near me that does a whole room with designers and high end labels. You can get a $500 outfit for $30. 

Edited by Mindthinkr
Never mind
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8 minutes ago, Mindthinkr said:

I have a feeling that her husband is behind this. He wants her to look very good as his wife...a future Minister’s wife and helpful co-leader of a congregation. Jeremy takes care in his appearance and knows that some people judge you by how you look. 

You can get hundred dollar blouses at a thrift store inexpensively. I know of a good one near me that does a whole room with designers and high end labels. You can get a $500 outfit for $30. 

There is a resale shop near my home that only accepts higher end clothes, shoes and accessories that have to be in style. You can easily buy something nice for $20. 

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5 minutes ago, libgirl2 said:

There is a resale shop near my home that only accepts higher end clothes, shoes and accessories that have to be in style. You can easily buy something nice for $20. 

It's not that tough to find end-of-season sales, even at Brooks Brothers, where new things are half price.  I get a lot of my professional wardrobe that way, what I don't get from Target, that is.  The shirt that Jinger appears to be wearing in the most recent photo looks like one that is currently on clearance for $49.  Not cheap, but not $100, either.

Jessa could dress a lot better than she does, it doesn't take a lot of money to find things that fit well and look nice.  She could easily do it if she wanted, she apparently doesn't want to do it.

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28 minutes ago, Nysha said:

Jill has 1.6 million followers on her Instagram, that's her social media career. She sucks at it, but for people who are willing to work there is good money to be made. My grandson watches YouTube videos of a little boy named Ryan opening presents and going to different themes parks. I read an article last spring and in the 2-3 years his family has been doing this they've made over $3 million!

There are tons of people who make a shitload of money posting pics of their outfits on social media, or of themselves eating, or equally frivolous crap. It boggles my mind, truly. I think a large part of it is really luck, but I also think some people are more skilled at attracting followers and have a knack for photography and trends and actively work at honing their skills over time. Another key thing is that they keep in mind what their viewer want to see. Jill doesn't seem to care to do this, so her "career" will never be as big as it could be.

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I dressed my youngest in name brands very inexpensively from thrift stores, resale stores, and outlet stores. Jinger may be doing the same thing, but even if she's not, her sisters could easily copy her more stylish look and still not spend much more than what they're spending now.

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23 minutes ago, doodlebug said:

It's not that tough to find end-of-season sales, even at Brooks Brothers, where new things are half price.  I get a lot of my professional wardrobe that way, what I don't get from Target, that is.  The shirt that Jinger appears to be wearing in the most recent photo looks like one that is currently on clearance for $49.  Not cheap, but not $100, either.

Jessa could dress a lot better than she does, it doesn't take a lot of money to find things that fit well and look nice.  She could easily do it if she wanted, she apparently doesn't want to do it.

One of my old bosses is incredibly fashionable.  I was shocked when I spoke to one of our mutual friends and she said that she gets a lot of her wardrobe at Ross and Macy's and doesn't spend a lot.  Macy's does have expensive clothes but they also have ridiculously good sales.  You just have to have a good eye and sense for fashion.  Plus TIME to sort through it all to get a gem.

Edited by Natalie68
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I agree, graefin. YouTube and Instagram can be lucrative mediums for people with sizable followings, but I think the Duggar girls underestimate how much time and effort goes into creating and editing content. 

Edited by BitterApple
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51 minutes ago, Nysha said:

I dressed my youngest in name brands very inexpensively from thrift stores, resale stores, and outlet stores. Jinger may be doing the same thing, but even if she's not, her sisters could easily copy her more stylish look and still not spend much more than what they're spending now.

I see there is a Tanger outlet in Laredo. It's possible they get better prices there, and Tangers often have a lot of coupons and special offers, too. Still, I doubt they would be able to afford much from there if not for TLC, being a small-church minister whose wife doesn't work. 

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2 hours ago, Nysha said:

Jill has 1.6 million followers on her Instagram, that's her social media career. She sucks at it, but for people who are willing to work there is good money to be made. My grandson watches YouTube videos of a little boy named Ryan opening presents and going to different themes parks. I read an article last spring and in the 2-3 years his family has been doing this they've made over $3 million!

Jill could make a lot of money if she had a clue. 

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2 hours ago, Nysha said:

Jill has 1.6 million followers on her Instagram, that's her social media career. She sucks at it, but for people who are willing to work there is good money to be made. My grandson watches YouTube videos of a little boy named Ryan opening presents and going to different themes parks. I read an article last spring and in the 2-3 years his family has been doing this they've made over $3 million!

Yay to another family exploiting their child for $$?

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6 hours ago, graefin said:

There are tons of people who make a shitload of money posting pics of their outfits on social media, or of themselves eating, or equally frivolous crap. It boggles my mind, truly. I think a large part of it is really luck, but I also think some people are more skilled at attracting followers and have a knack for photography and trends and actively work at honing their skills over time. Another key thing is that they keep in mind what their viewer want to see. Jill doesn't seem to care to do this, so her "career" will never be as big as it could be.

A huge part of it is the person's appearance. While "hustle" is definitely part of it, looks pretty much set the stage for everything else. Photography skill is quite unnecessary, and even then, the person doesn't even handle that themselves. Jill is nowhere near attractive enough to have success as an Instagram model, but she fortunately already has a high follower count from being on TV. There are so many sponsorships she could get, since anybody with a hint of e-notoriety usually promotes the same types of products. (hair/nail vitamin gummies, weight loss tea, FabFitFun subscription boxes) I imagine most of those products are inherently sinful in her mind, so perhaps not. The Duggars have been conditioned for their whole lives to not be their own person and to serve everyone else, but it's still frustrating that Jill is no longer part of the show and yet seemingly has no desire to carve out her own 'brand' online, when it could be quite lucrative to do so. I would argue that she's so boring, it wouldn't work, but there are still a million plus people tuning into the dull shitshow after all these years (including myself) so there is an audience for...whatever she does.

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1 hour ago, Neet said:

A huge part of it is the person's appearance. While "hustle" is definitely part of it, looks pretty much set the stage for everything else. Photography skill is quite unnecessary, and even then, the person doesn't even handle that themselves. Jill is nowhere near attractive enough to have success as an Instagram model, but she fortunately already has a high follower count from being on TV. There are so many sponsorships she could get, since anybody with a hint of e-notoriety usually promotes the same types of products. (hair/nail vitamin gummies, weight loss tea, FabFitFun subscription boxes) I imagine most of those products are inherently sinful in her mind, so perhaps not. The Duggars have been conditioned for their whole lives to not be their own person and to serve everyone else, but it's still frustrating that Jill is no longer part of the show and yet seemingly has no desire to carve out her own 'brand' online, when it could be quite lucrative to do so. I would argue that she's so boring, it wouldn't work, but there are still a million plus people tuning into the dull shitshow after all these years (including myself) so there is an audience for...whatever she does.

The Ashley Madison adultery dating website has an affiliate program.  Jill could make money by touting this as the dating site used by her brother.

Counting On 3.jpg

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19 minutes ago, Mollie said:

The Ashley Madison adultery dating website has an affiliate program.  Jill could make money by touting this as the dating site used by her brother.

Counting On 3.jpg

It seems people use the "They were conditioned that way! Poor things were completely molded by their environment" reasoning for the Duggar girls on occasion, yet I've never seen anyone use it for Josh. I'm not defending him, since it would require growing up in or around that family to make an accurate conclusion (watching their show/reading articles does not suffice). So why doesn't the reasoning work for Josh?

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7 minutes ago, dargosmydaddy said:

There were actually some folks here who brought up Josh's upbringing in why he did what he did. Not to the extent of "poor thing," but it was definitely discussed in the aftermath of the scandal(s).

That said, I can't think of anything the Duggar girls have done that in any way equates to what Josh has done, so I don't think the comparison is warranted.

It's quite likely that there are a lot of things that happened in the past that haven't been revealed, possibly Jim Bob and Michelle don't even know about them. Having so many kids grow up pretty much isolated from everyone else their own age, it seems like problems would be inevitable. Also to think only one person out of the whole family could've turned out "evil" is a bit of a stretch. I think they had their first TV special in 2004 or somewhere around there, then got the show in 2008 - after such a long time, it's hard to imagine that what we see on TV isn't the whole story or could even be a total farce.

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10 minutes ago, InternetToughGuy said:

It's quite likely that there are a lot of things that happened in the past that haven't been revealed, possibly Jim Bob and Michelle don't even know about them. Having so many kids grow up pretty much isolated from everyone else their own age, it seems like problems would be inevitable. Also to think only one person out of the whole family could've turned out "evil" is a bit of a stretch. I think they had their first TV special in 2004 or somewhere around there, then got the show in 2008 - after such a long time, it's hard to imagine that what we see on TV isn't the whole story or could even be a total farce.

And the show is edited.  It would be more accurate - but would never happen - if TLC set up cameras in certain areas and just let them roll.  then there wouldn't be numerous "takes" of allegedly spontaneous scenes that look dull probably because they've had the spontaneity stripped by doing them a lot of times.

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9 hours ago, doodlebug said:

Jessa could dress a lot better than she does, it doesn't take a lot of money to find things that fit well and look nice.  She could easily do it if she wanted, she apparently doesn't want to do it.

Carlin Bates post tons of pictures in stylish clothing and she has mentioned that many of the nice dresses she wears to church are from Ross. It doesn't cost a lot of money to look cute and put together. I think Jessa just doens't put an effort into her look because she doesn't go out much, so why bother. She also considers throwing on a swing dress as dressing up so it's safe to say she just not into fashion. 

Edited by Lunera
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35 minutes ago, InternetToughGuy said:

It's quite likely that there are a lot of things that happened in the past that haven't been revealed, possibly Jim Bob and Michelle don't even know about them. Having so many kids grow up pretty much isolated from everyone else their own age, it seems like problems would be inevitable. Also to think only one person out of the whole family could've turned out "evil" is a bit of a stretch. I think they had their first TV special in 2004 or somewhere around there, then got the show in 2008 - after such a long time, it's hard to imagine that what we see on TV isn't the whole story or could even be a total farce.

Well obviously, yes, that's what reality TV is. But your original point was why people don't show Josh the same sympathy they (sometimes) show his sisters. Regardless of what horrible crimes his sisters may have possibly committed off camera, Josh did, for certain, do awful things. And if tomorrow it's revealed that Jessa molested her younger siblings or something equally horrific, I would imagine she would be judged as harshly as Josh.

In the meantime, to get back on the topic of Jessa, more Spurgeon and Henry at play...

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11 hours ago, Nysha said:

Jill has 1.6 million followers on her Instagram, that's her social media career. She sucks at it, but for people who are willing to work there is good money to be made. My grandson watches YouTube videos of a little boy named Ryan opening presents and going to different themes parks. I read an article last spring and in the 2-3 years his family has been doing this they've made over $3 million!

My son watches him too!!  My 9 year old is at this moment making a "video" on her phone (she's not allowed to post anything online) talking about her yogurt and the day she had....YouTube makes everyone and their dog believe they can be famous for doing mundane shit.

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13 hours ago, DragonFaerie said:

 

They were allowed to dig for "fossils?"  Isn't that antifundie?  The whole the world is more than 6,000 years old and, you know, science and stuff?  But these boys are cute and look REAL spoons!

Oh, fossils in no way contradict the earth being 6,000 years old. Nope, not at all. Carbon dating is totally a conspiracy perpetuated by heathens.

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And God put fossils there to test people's faith.  Or else they're left over from the Flood, from all the animals that didn't make it on the Ark.  Or whatever other rationalization is the in things these days.

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24 minutes ago, MyPeopleAreNordic said:

What is an "affiliate program" in this context? I'm confused. 

When bloggers/instagrammers/etc. sign up for affiliate programs, they can include links to various businesses in their posts. They get some amount of money if readers click those links and buy from the site.

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