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Commercials That Annoy, Irritate or Outright Enrage


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Key rules:  Stay on topic; go to Small Talk with things not about commercials; be civil; no politics. 

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(edited)

I guess I'll put my first  PTV post here.

Samsung is now advertising these new curved HDTVS.  I wouldn't be so annoyed if the commercial explained what's so damn better about having a curved tv over a flat one.

Edited by InDueTime
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From way back on page 1:

that little blonde 'children of the corn' girl in the BMW commercial with her odd way of talking makes me want to... permanently glue a pacifier to her mouth.

 

"Mummy, what...is...neu...ter...ing?"

 

I can't get past wondering why the hell she has an English accent? The mom only says, "Um....", but it doesn't seem as if she has an accent. And it's a U.S. commercial for U.S. television, so I just cannot figure it out.

Also, the fact that the dog apparently knows what neutering is, but the kid doesn't, does not speak kindly about the girl.

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From way back on page 1:

"Mummy, what...is...neu...ter...ing?"

 

I can't get past wondering why the hell she has an English accent? The mom only says, "Um....", but it doesn't seem as if she has an accent. And it's a U.S. commercial for U.S. television, so I just cannot figure it out.

Also, the fact that the dog apparently knows what neutering is, but the kid doesn't, does not speak kindly about the girl.

For some reason, the accent seems Nordic to me.  Either way, it doesn't make sense with a German car company advertising in the US.

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From way back on page 1:

"Mummy, what...is...neu...ter...ing?"

I can't get past wondering why the hell she has an English accent? The mom only says, "Um....", but it doesn't seem as if she has an accent. And it's a U.S. commercial for U.S. television, so I just cannot figure it out.

Also, the fact that the dog apparently knows what neutering is, but the kid doesn't, does not speak kindly about the girl.

 

For some reason, the accent seems Nordic to me.  Either way, it doesn't make sense with a German car company advertising in the US.

 

I noticed small print that says it's a European model BMW, which makes me hate the woman even more.  It may explain the accents.  But it's still a stupid commercial.

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There's something creepy about that guy in the Papa John ads.  He's smiling, but his eyes look scary.

Enough with the Greek pizza. The philosophy thing is idiotic. And yes, he is creepy.

 

Speaking of pizza, Blake Shelton, I thought you might have had more self respect. Not a lot. Just enough to not hawk BBQ pizza or whatever he's selling in that commercial.

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There's something creepy about that guy in the Papa John ads.  He's smiling, but his eyes look scary.

We probably shouldn't talk politics in this forum, but if we could, I would have a lot to say about him.

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This would be an example of subliminal advertising, if it weren't so fucking gross and obvious.

 

http://youtu.be/insIqD4sCPA

 

The actor/model is actually a pretty cool dude himself.  His name is Andy McDermott, and I follow him on Twitter.  He is a former professional soccer player and real-life cop who went into acting back around 2009 -- where he usually plays cops! -- and he also is a certified personal trainer who does training videos on his YouTube channel.  Alas, he's also straight, happily married, and the proud father of four kids who all share his passion for fitness.

 

It's amazing how much you can learn about someone in only 140 characters.

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Ugh!  The Lipozene woman!  I cannot STAND the way she pronounces the word "fat."  It's like it has two syllables - fay-et.

 

For about 10 seconds once another lady did the Lipozene spot, and I thought it had to be because the original couldn't pronounce "fat" properly.

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I guess I'll put my first  PTV post here.

Samsung is now advertising these new curved HDTVS.  I wouldn't be so annoyed if the commercial explained what's so damn better about having a curved tv over a flat one.

It's funny that curved is in when for how many years, TVs had curved screens and the new thing was flat screen.  I know it's a different curve but it's funny to me.

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Velveeta just needs to give up already.  First it was the stupid, weird, creepy Liquid Gold blacksmith guy.  With his long, drawn out "Gold" that made me want to bang my head against a wall.  Or showing up at some random woman's front door (and he so looks like he's there to kill her.)

 

Now it's Harold and Margaret holding what are apparently Skillets of Destiny. 

 

Message to folks at Velveeta:  I'm never going to stop believing that your product's nearest relative on the chem chain is Silly Putty.

 

 

Strudel boy haunts my dreams.

 

Me too!

 

Along with the Geico paintings.  Once I woke up in the middle of the night and discovered the next day I'd sent out a stupid tweet about my Geico painting nightmare.  That was weird... (wanders off in search of Gary Busey.)

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The commercial for some prescription drug that elevates your energy level or makes you wanna go outside or some other non depressive thing.   I don't remember if the two actors are talking or the narrator is but somebody is describing side effects (hey, p.s. can we talk about some of those side effects? lol) and someone says:  for this symptom, you may need to up your water.   Look, I've been patient but it's officially dumbassery that this has made it into the mainstream.  UP. is. not. a. fucking. verb.

 

//endgrammarrage

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Message to folks at Velveeta:  I'm never going to stop believing that your product's nearest relative on the chem chain is Silly Putty.

I keep seeing the "eat like that guy you know" ones with the friend of the pro-basketball player and the guy in witness protection. Neither of these things are selling me cheese. How were people paid to do this?

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I keep seeing the "eat like that guy you know" ones with the friend of the pro-basketball player

My kiddo saw that last night & told me she didn't want any Velveeta, but she thought being a basketball player's best friend sounded pretty great & wondered why they were selling something we can't buy.
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Oh my god, you all are killing me. I hate commercials so much and thanks for sharing the hate: awesome sauce girl, Flo, Fran, Stupid Sprint family, offensive marionette wife and idiot husband with direct tv, that redheaded Wendy's beyotch, that British tchick talking about bums for cottonelle, Orbit lady, and so on and so on..More on the framily, shut up little girl speaking French, WTF is with the hamster, why is "dad" black, is mom the Gossip Girl chick, GorDon is the only semi-humorous thing in that dreck.

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More on the framily, shut up little girl speaking French, WTF is with the hamster, why is "dad" black, is mom the Gossip Girl chick, GorDon is the only semi-humorous thing in that dreck.

I think those commercials are stupid but I think the "mom" you're talking about is Judy Greer who has tons of nerd cred.

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I have to echo the hatred toward the marionette family.   The little boy is not so bad, because what little boy HASN"T tried to hook his belt to the ceiling fan and try to fly.  But the Mom just creeps me out.   Especially in the latest one, where she is doing the "sexy" dance.   I have to leave the room when it is on, I don't want to see it or hear it.   Talk about the ultimate submissive wife.   You can literally control her.   Just ICK.

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Every Skittels ad.

 

I question not only how did Marionette wife get the negligee on, but how she gets if off during her little striptease. And what are the wires attached to? Are there tracks running all over the house? Because they would never be able to go outside. They also remind me of the Mayflower commercials a few years back that featured a giant sized marionette helping people move that was also kind of terrifying.

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How do we feel about the smoking ads? I am not someone who smokes, who has ever smoked, or who has the desire to ever smoke. But I swear there was a time when I thought to myself "I am going to take up smoking just to spite these stupid ads." No, I wasn't ever really serious but I did find them incredibly irritating. I still hate the ones that show the effects of smoking on the body whether it's amputating body parts or the condition of a smoker's lung because, No, I don't want to see that and die hard smokers (I'm related to a few) are not going to quit because of your stupid commercials. You're just ruining whatever program I'm watching at the moment (which is probably why I'm so addicted to fast-forwarding through commercials now). I kind of like the idea of the new smoking ads where they equate a cigarette with a bully or a bad boyfriend (even though I'm a little bothered by the way it's gendered). I think the "what are cigarettes costing you" commercials where a girl removes a piece of skin from her face and a boy pulls out a tooth aren't as effective as the ones I just mentioned but they're also not as bad as the earlier disgusting ones so that's a slight improvement.

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How do we feel about the smoking ads? I am not someone who smokes, who has ever smoked, or who has the desire to ever smoke. But I swear there was a time when I thought to myself "I am going to take up smoking just to spite these stupid ads."

Back when I smoked, whenever I saw an anti smoking commercial, it always made me want a cigarette. 

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(edited)

I hate the Fiber One ads with the reworked lyrics to "Total Eclipse of the Heart." They had me until the line with "protein so my wife won't give me anymore flak." Yes, it's so terrible to have someone looking out for your well-being, and why couldn't the lyric be "doctor" instead of "wife"? It's as bad as the ads where the dads are "babysitting" their own children and are totally inept at taking care of them.

Edited by dubbel zout
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I hate the Fiber One ads with the reworked lyrics to "Total Eclipse of the Heart." They had me until the line with "protein so my wife won't give me anymore flak." Yes, it's so terrible to have someone looking out for your well-being, and why couldn't the lyric be "doctor" instead of "wife"? It's as bad as the ads where the dads are "babysitting" their own children and are totally inept at taking care of them.

Maybe the husband has his life insurance through Colonial Penn instead of MetLife and therefore, there's no big pay-out?

TD Bank's "fiscal lube" commercial

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i1GqHCJjNjA&index=9&list=PLTU0DAa2Moxy_aaWrVPR-964SMpHE7M8w

 

Is the checking chamber mechanic the woman in Portlandia?

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The problem with the current anti-smoking PSAs is that they don't make much sense. Some "kid" goes into a convenience store and asks for a "pack of menthols" - like there are no brands or anything. That's like walking into a bar and asking for "a drink." Or "a beer." Then the lady behind the counter says you'll have to peel off part of your face. WTH? I get where they're going with this but they're doing it in a completely unrealistic and silly way. Just show some actual skin damage that's been done to a long-time smoker. Teens are far more likely to be scared off by that.

 

 

I think those commercials are stupid but I think the "mom" you're talking about is Judy Greer who has tons of nerd cred.

 

Not that she should go away entirely, but she's too good to be doing crappy TV commercials. Is she that desperate for work?

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I think those commercials are stupid but I think the "mom" you're talking about is Judy Greer who has tons of nerd cred.

Not that she should go away entirely, but she's too good to be doing crappy TV commercials. Is she that desperate for work?

 

I just heard her on WTF with Marc Maron, and they talked about her commercials. She likes doing them. She said the Sprint commercials were based on some that appeared in Japan (for some other product, though she didn't say which). She's making a ton of dough from them.

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I'm going to try to talk about this one without getting too specific, but the commercial for Kotex U with all the panties being thrown away everywhere grosses me out. 

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(edited)

Regarding the commercial for Direct TV and "no wires," I would imagine that the portion of the population that opposes gay marriage would also be against human and marionette marriage. Although unlike in a gay marriage, apparently humans and marionettes can produce offspring. Not sure if that would make it better or worse in their eyes.

 

But seriously, once they showed the human guy with the marionette wife and marionette kid, the agency could not resist capitalizing on what they knew everyone was thinking about. Human and marionette sex. So we get the guy laying on his back in bed and the "like what you see?" marionette negligee dance. When kinky turns to creepy.

 

I initially found the "Framily" commercials to be mildly amusing, but they seem to be on every 5 minutes, no matter what you're watching, and commercials that try hard to be intentionally hip and edgy get annoying fast. Speaking of annoying, that goony looking kid with the over-the-top southern drawl needs to go. And which one is "Dad," the gerbil or the older black guy? All this hipness is confusing.

Edited by bluepiano
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(edited)

I think the dad is the hamster & older black dude is grandpa maybe? I thought the French child called the hamster dad when she mentioned that while he hated the word framily he loved the word brunch. And the preceding sentences read like crazy talk.

I'm so over those commercials. Next will an alien be a cousin or a whale dial from under water? Their point of friends + family seems to get lost in the OTT quirkiness.

Edited by ramble
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Eh, I think I'm more forgiving of the new friends and framily commercials because they took more effort than the old ones which seems to consist of "make a bunch of people stand together in a room."

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I don't generally advocate punching children, but the kid in the Special K commercial who comes to the front door shilling a box of donuts (like that's even a thing that kids sell) makes me want to rethink this position. The simpering, affected Vanna White pose she uses when she's holding up the box is irritating enough, but her pronounciation of "donuts" is downright absurd. It comes out like "daa..ts?" How did no one making the commercial notice this? Was there no other kid who could utter their one-word line correctly? Hate.

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I don't generally advocate punching children, but the kid in the Special K commercial who comes to the front door shilling a box of donuts (like that's even a thing that kids sell) makes me want to rethink this position. The simpering, affected Vanna White pose she uses when she's holding up the box is irritating enough, but her pronounciation of "donuts" is downright absurd. It comes out like "daa..ts?" How did no one making the commercial notice this? Was there no other kid who could utter their one-word line correctly? Hate.

 

LMAO!! Applause. 

 

Methinks Kellogg was doing its level best to put us in mind of girl scouts with all that teetering on the brink of infringement or something similar.  Fucking with girl scouts of America is probably not as innocuous as it might sound so donuts it is.   I don't know why anyone, diet or not, would find a stale box of pastry with 2nd grader's breath and fingerprints all over it appealing, but lookit, to each their own.

 

My new annoyance is the allergy medicine commercial with the lady stopped at the light in her convertible on a summer day.  Then along comes Mr. John Deere and now she needs a crash cart.  Here's the thing, if your allergen trigger is outdoors and it's strong enough that a landscaper has the ability to send you into grand mal seizure, you already kinda know that a little bit andplusalso it's really unlikely you drive around with your car top down.  Because you know, outside can affect your breathing and stuff.

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My new annoyance is the allergy medicine commercial with the lady stopped at the light in her convertible on a summer day.  Then along comes Mr. John Deere and now she needs a crash cart.  Here's the thing, if your allergen trigger is outdoors and it's strong enough that a landscaper has the ability to send you into grand mal seizure, you already kinda know that a little bit andplusalso it's really unlikely you drive around with your car top down.  Because you know, outside can affect your breathing and stuff.

 

 

My annoyance with this commercial is not so much the frantic struggle to get the convertible top up, it is the fact that Mr. John Deere is cutting the grass, and the car is soon to be pelted with grass clippings.

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I don't generally advocate punching children, but the kid in the Special K commercial who comes to the front door shilling a box of donuts (like that's even a thing that kids sell) makes me want to rethink this position. The simpering, affected Vanna White pose she uses when she's holding up the box is irritating enough, but her pronounciation of "donuts" is downright absurd. It comes out like "daa..ts?" How did no one making the commercial notice this? Was there no other kid who could utter their one-word line correctly? Hate.

In the south at least Krispy Kreme donut sells for school projects has been a major fund raiser for about 15 years now. Kids take your orders, they do go door to door with a small order sheet. However like most children driven fund raisers the parents are usually hitting up the coworkers. When the donuts come in the kids deliver or the parents. The more aggressive kids always order a few extra for door to door direct sells. To be honest their is a box each of raspberry and crème filled donuts in fridge now from some middle school for some project. I did not ask questions I just followed the reciprocating parent/coworker code.

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I haven't seen the Lipozene ad in ages . . . isn't that the one with the woman who pronounces "major university double-blind study" so deliberately that you'd swear English is not her native language?

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The problem with the current anti-smoking PSAs is that they don't make much sense. Some "kid" goes into a convenience store and asks for a "pack of menthols" - like there are no brands or anything. That's like walking into a bar and asking for "a drink." Or "a beer." Then the lady behind the counter says you'll have to peel off part of your face. WTH? I get where they're going with this but they're doing it in a completely unrealistic and silly way. Just show some actual skin damage that's been done to a long-time smoker. Teens are far more likely to be scared off by that.

 

No, they wouldn't.  Teens tend to think that they're immortal and invulnerable and that the bad stuff can never happen to them.  It's an attitude that they don't really outgrow until they hit about 40 or so, unfortunately (which is why they balk at buying catastrophic health insurance that they're sure they'll never need) -- and that's because the bad stuff DOES start happening to them after that age.

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Teens tend to think that they're immortal and invulnerable and that the bad stuff can never happen to them.  It's an attitude that they don't really outgrow until they hit about 40 or so, unfortunately (which is why they balk at buying catastrophic health insurance that they're sure they'll never need) -- and that's because the bad stuff DOES start happening to them after that age.

 

Yes, but they're not any more likely to be scared off by the visage of someone peeling off part of their face to buy a pack of smokes. Because, assuming they've bought cigarettes before, they know you don't pay for them that way. 

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The ad says all that underwear is being tossed because of stains, so I'm imagining they're all dirty.

 

I'd think they're stained - although none of them in that commercial actually appear to be, for obvious reasons - but cleaned (went through the washer and dryer, then got tossed because they're permanently stained).

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I'm quite perplexed by the number of car commercials - especially luxury cars, and especially at the holidays - in which someone surprises their partner with a car as a gift.  I'd feel like an ingrate, but I'd be annoyed if someone bought me a car without my input (and particularly uncomfortable if it was a partner); it's not like a sweater I can exchange for one more to my tastes, and if I'm going to be driving something for 15-20 years, I want to be the one choosing its features.

 

Lexus does that kind of ad every year around the holidays... except a couple years ago they got really obnoxious and did a series of ads about people who surprise their loved ones by presenting them with a decoy gift.

 

The one I remember was a music box and when the recipient opens it, the music box plays the Lexus jingle... at which point the recipient makes a thrilled "You got me a Lexus!" face. It's annoying enough to suggest giving a car as a gift (I knew a guy who did that once, unfortunately he wanted to surprise his wife at work and driving a car with a bow on top is very difficult) but to have people 1) know the Lexus jingle outside of watching TV ads 2) respond to hearing that jingle by thinking they must be getting a Lexus.

 

I can understand being walked to a car with a ribbon and thinking it's your present, but you've got to be pretty entitled to think someone is giving you a luxury car because you got a gift that plays that car's jingle. Even worse, I think there was one ad where the couple is in an elevator and the muzak turns into that jingle, presuming that something in a public place like that is about you.

 

 

Any and all political ads. They're bombarding the airwaves and I'm SICK and tired of them -_- Along with any and all drug ads, along with their long lists of side effects, etc.

 

This is the time of the year when I really appreciate my DVR. I record the morning hews just so that I can skip the commercials. Sure, I have to remind myself that when they say they're "live" at a location that was a half-hour ago but I love not seeing stupid political ads.

 

There's something creepy about that guy in the Papa John ads.  He's smiling, but his eyes look scary.

 

We probably shouldn't talk politics in this forum, but if we could, I would have a lot to say about him.

 

Having once worked in the back office for a food service chain, you don't have to get into politics to discuss why that guy is an asshat.

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Yes, but they're not any more likely to be scared off by the visage of someone peeling off part of their face to buy a pack of smokes. Because, assuming they've bought cigarettes before, they know you don't pay for them that way. 

 

I see what you're saying, but the larger point is that teens simply wouldn't be fazed by that sight anyway because they would never believe that it could -- or would -- happen to them.  That's all I was really saying.

This is the time of the year when I really appreciate my DVR. I record the morning hews just so that I can skip the commercials. Sure, I have to remind myself that when they say they're "live" at a location that was a half-hour ago but I love not seeing stupid political ads.

 

You've got that right.  It's the whole reason that I dread election years (and 2016 is really going to be cringeworthy -- somebody just wake me on January 1, 2017!).  What's really bad now is that you can't even escape political ads on the Internet -- YouTube is crawling with them during election season, especially the local ads (which are somehow even worse and more offensive to me than the national ads!).

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I hate the Fiber One ads with the reworked lyrics to "Total Eclipse of the Heart." They had me until the line with "protein so my wife won't give me anymore flak." Yes, it's so terrible to have someone looking out for your well-being, and why couldn't the lyric be "doctor" instead of "wife"?

 

Dontchaknow that men would rather ask directions than see a doctor willingly, or take his or her advice, and it is a wife's job to endlessly nag at him to do so?  It's why women get married.

 

I haven't seen the Lipozene ad in ages . . . isn't that the one with the woman who pronounces "major university double-blind study" so deliberately that you'd swear English is not her native language?

 

Yes!  Although coincidentally I saw a Lipozene commercial last night and no woman, just a male voiceover.  Who could pronounce "fat" just fine.

 

The anti-smoking commercials are just so over-the-top ridiculous.  I understand that some people have complications like Teri or that woman who lost all her fingers, but seriously, how many of those do you know?  I get what they're going for but the examples they use are just so worse, worse, worse case.  If I was a smoker and those ads came on, my eyes would roll right out of my head. 

 

Here's one that INFURIATES me.  I don't know what it's for, it infuriates me so much.  But it's the one with the two women on the airplane, with the child behind them who is harrassing them beyond belief.  Yelling, screaming, pushing their seat backs, hitting them in the back of the head.  Cut to fantasy sequence where the little terror is standing there apologizing for being such a hassle.  Oh, too bad the world isn't fantasy where toddlers aren't terrors but <x> product can give you the same effect.  Cut back to reality and the little terror is hanging upside down between their seats screaming. 

 

So yeah.  Who the fuck expects a child that age (they describe him as a toddler but that's stretching the definition I think) to apologize so maturely?  Not me, that's for sure.  But you know what the fuck I DO expect?  The kid's PARENTS to control their child and offer an apology if for some reason they fail to do that for a moment or two.  I cannot STAND the message this commercial seems to reinforce - that we all have no choice but to put up with the bad behavior of precious children that no one seems to be able to discipline. 

 

This is a super pet peeve of mine.  Yes, children will behave as children.  This is why adults need to teach them how to behave properly.  And children learn by repetition.  So it may take a couple or two hundred times to correct the behavior.  You may have to do it the whole fucking flight.  But you know what, that's your job as a parent.  It is not anyone's job to put up with your obnoxious kids.  Toddler boy should have been pulled back by his hair when he was hanging over the seat in front of him.

 

Rant over.

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...you already kinda know that a little bit andplusalso it's really unlikely you drive around with your car top down. 

I think andplusalso is going to be my new word. :)

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(edited)

I think the dad is the hamster & older black dude is grandpa maybe? I thought the French child called the hamster dad when she mentioned that while he hated the word framily he loved the word brunch.

 

In the first commercial with the older dude the woman says to him,  "Welcome to the framily, Dad." So is he supposed to her father, making them a bi-racial, bi-species family? Or in the "framily" are all titles and relationships interchangeable and/or honorary?

 

The fact that we're talking about this means they've won.

Edited by bluepiano
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Yes, but in the first commercial with the older dude the woman says "Welcome to the framily, Dad." The fact that we're even talking about this means they've won.

The redhead is married to the hamster and the french speaking girl is their daughter.  The older black man "DAD" is the redhead's father.

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