Commercials That Annoy, Irritate or Outright Enrage

[janie jones]

23 hours ago, peacheslatour said:

I agree. That commercial bugs the shit out of me. Unless these two idiots are related, why would she say "our ancestor"? My husband's ancestors are HIS, my ancestor's are mine. We don't have "our" ancestors.

What's more, without going back and looking up the commercial, I don't believe the woman even has her own DNA looked at, so she wouldn't even know if they shared this specific ancestor.

23 hours ago, LoneHaranguer said:

Doesn't everybody if you go back far enough? It helps if your ancestry goes back to someplace that's relatively isolated (e.g. a Cuban couple rather than Mexican).

True, but that still doesn't make the commercial make sense, because, as I said above (in this post, and my post from earlier today), she doesn't even know they share the supposed ancestor, because she didn't do her own DNA test, first of all, and second of all, she starts out the commercial talking about his ancestor, and jumps for no apparent reason to talking about a shared ancestor. 

I truly don't think the commercial is trying to say that they have a shared ancestor.  I think this person is a dimwit who doesn't seem to understand that being married doesn't mean you share an ancestor.

Edited January 14, 2017 by janie jones

[Jamoche]

49 minutes ago, Mittengirl said:

I keep seeing a commercial with a woman in a car saying that her mornings are so busy she doesn't have time to hashtag her breakfast, so she drinks some yogurt-y thing instead.  What the hell?!  Maybe that makes sense to someone, somewhere, but I don't get it.  

Strange are the ways of the Yogurt Bitches.

[Mittengirl]

Amen, Jamoche.

[Aquarius]

Speaking of Yogurt Bitches, the two in the car repeating "Protein-y!" to each other must be the significant others of the Sonic idjits.

[Silver Raven]

3 hours ago, janie jones said:

As it stands, she's referring to her husband's great-great-great-great-great whatever as her own ancestor.

And then they show a photo of this supposedly unknown ancestor that looks like it was taken in the 20s.  So this guy never knew his grandfather wasn't Italian?

[Aquarius]

22 minutes ago, Silver Raven said:

And then they show a photo of this supposedly unknown ancestor that looks like it was taken in the 20s.  So this guy never knew his grandfather wasn't Italian?

Lidia Bastianich is ethnically Croat (which would probably be considered "Eastern European" - what a wide and useless classification).  But she considers herself 100% Italian . . . again, with the culture vs DNA thing . . . It would even apply to our ancestors born of an ethnicity but raised in a different place.  People have been emigrating and immigrating for a long time.  This DNA thing seems more and more meaningless to me.

I had a friend whose entire immediate family took the test at the interest of her sister, who is a genealogy fiend.  She told me that she came up 20% Persian, apparently from her mother who came up 10% Persian, as her father had no Persian DNA.  It's been a while since I took my Genetics class in college, and to be fair I don't know what algorithm they are using to calculate percentage, but I don't see how that is possible given how heredity works.  So even before these annoying commercials, I've been a little suspect of the whole profiling idea.

[ennui]

It occurred to me that these DNA commercials are really a sneaky way to collect data for a DNA database. Heck, felons kick up a fuss over DNA collection, but with the commercials, people can't wait to sign up and pay for the privilege.  *adjusts tinfoil hat*

[Ohwell]

I cannot stand those two annoying DriveTime bitches.

[Aquarius]

33 minutes ago, ennui said:

It occurred to me that these DNA commercials are really a sneaky way to collect data for a DNA database. Heck, felons kick up a fuss over DNA collection, but with the commercials, people can't wait to sign up and pay for the privilege.  *adjusts tinfoil hat*

But who would care, unless they have something to hide?  Said by the authorities about every breach of privacy or violation of civil rights, ever. 

As you may guess, I too wear a tinfoil hat.

[Brattinella]

52 minutes ago, ennui said:

It occurred to me that these DNA commercials are really a sneaky way to collect data for a DNA database. Heck, felons kick up a fuss over DNA collection, but with the commercials, people can't wait to sign up and pay for the privilege.  *adjusts tinfoil hat*

This was my same opinion regarding facebook.  If the govt wanted everyone to give up all their personal details, most folks would say "warrant". With facebook, they all give it up voluntarily.

[chessiegal]

Out of curiosity, I went to the ancestry.com website. I know this won't convince any tinfoil hat wearers, but what good is their database to outside sources if there are no names associated with it? Sounds to me this would require a search warrant approved by a court to get personal info. As someone who is retired from a federal law enforcement agency, they often don't have enough resources to do their job to the best of their capabilities, let alone willy nilly go after mostly useless information.

Quote

Your privacy is important to us. We use industry standard security practices to store your DNA sample, your DNA test results, and other personal data you provide to us. In addition, we store your DNA test results and DNA sample without your name or other common identifying information. You own your DNA data. At any time, you can choose to download raw DNA data, have us delete your DNA test results as described in the AncestryDNA Privacy Statement, or have us destroy your physical DNA saliva sample. We do not share with third parties your name or other common identifying information linked to your genetic data, except as legally required or with your explicit consent.                    

[LoneHaranguer]

58 minutes ago, Brattinella said:

If the govt wanted everyone to give up all their personal details, most folks would say "warrant". With facebook, they all give it up voluntarily.

Many or most anyway. I'm sure the frauds who've appeared on Catfish aren't anywhere near the only ones on Facebook who've lied about who they are.

[SmithW6079]

1 hour ago, ennui said:

It occurred to me that these DNA commercials are really a sneaky way to collect data for a DNA database. Heck, felons kick up a fuss over DNA collection, but with the commercials, people can't wait to sign up and pay for the privilege.  *adjusts tinfoil hat*

 

38 minutes ago, Aquarius said:

But who would care, unless they have something to hide?  Said by the authorities about every breach of privacy or violation of civil rights, ever. 

As you may guess, I too wear a tinfoil hat.

Mine is a jaunty fedora because I've said that since I first saw those commercials. 

[Ohwell]

I don't care what the site says, I'm keeping my hat on. 

[theatremouse]

7 hours ago, LoneHaranguer said:

Doesn't everybody if you go back far enough? It helps if your ancestry goes back to someplace that's relatively isolated (e.g. a Cuban couple rather than Mexican).

Even if that were the point of the bit, not really a great advertising strategy "yippee we just found out we're 12th cousins". I mean, yes, even 100 years ago it would be much more common to marry even a second or third cousin and think nothing of it. But these days, finding a common ancestor would probably be a disappointment to most couples, not something to advertise. So either it's a writing flub or a weird thing to be showing off.

[Aquarius]

2 hours ago, chessiegal said:

Out of curiosity, I went to the ancestry.com website. I know this won't convince any tinfoil hat wearers, but what good is their database to outside sources if there are no names associated with it? Sounds to me this would require a search warrant approved by a court to get personal info. As someone who is retired from a federal law enforcement agency, they often don't have enough resources to do their job to the best of their capabilities, let alone willy nilly go after mostly useless information.

I work for a company dealing in privatized records.  They don't come in that way.  I don't have access to any of them, but I know people who do, and I wouldn't put my absolute faith in some of them.

As for the point about limited resources and doing the job to the best of capabilities, I understand that's true on a local level.  But I'm sorry, what happened with the Verizon phone records has convinced me that in the digital age, pigs in a poke are cheaper to find than they used to be.  A search bot is not a huge drain of resources.

All of the above is tinfoil hat notwithstanding.

[chessiegal]

All I can say is the federal law enforcement agency I worked for, in the 27 years I was there, couldn't be bothered going on worthless witch hunts. The more than often insufficient resources we had went to doing the job we were mandated to do.

[amass]

10 hours ago, janie jones said:

My point is, the woman starts out the commercial talking about how she thought her husband was such-and-such, and at the end she's talking about "our ancestor."  If she had said "We found out we're distant cousins and our ancestor is blah blah blah," then it wouldn't be ridiculous.  As it stands, she's referring to her husband's great-great-great-great-great whatever as her own ancestor.

It wasn't stated in the commercial that they were either Ashkenazi Jews or European royalty, as it would have been either prior knowledge not necessitating the DNA test, or the reveal of the commercial, so I think it's safe to assume they are neither.  So I stand by my assessment of the commercial.

Sorry, I just it was funny to enough to mention... I totally agree with you

[Bastet]

As a civil rights lawyer, I cannot urge everyone strongly enough not to aid in shifting the "reasonable expectation of privacy" standard further to the "what, we all voluntarily put this shit out there anyway?" side of the scale.  Popping your DNA sample in the mail, and counting on benevolence and/or "Oh, we don't have time to abuse this database of information"?  Not the best strategy.  Now more than ever.

Getting back to commercials, the woman who thinks she has a shared ancestor by virtue of marriage drives me bats, too.  And, yes, it seems not to be some deliberate representation of shared ancestry once one delves back several generations, but just a bad copywriting choice.

[backformore]

11 hours ago, Mittengirl said:

I keep seeing a commercial with a woman in a car saying that her mornings are so busy she doesn't have time to hashtag her breakfast, so she drinks some yogurt-y thing instead.  What the hell?!  Maybe that makes sense to someone, somewhere, but I don't get it.  

I have seen some thing about hashtagging your breakfast.  I don't know if it started with a  fast food place or what, but for some reason, the trend is to take a photo of your breakfast and post it on social media.  Not my thing, I don't get it.   I prepare food to eat, not to photograph. 

[smittykins]

19 hours ago, OSM Mom said:

The ad for TLC go with the mother who is so caught up in whatever stupid show she's watching on her tablet, she chops her kids hair off and dresses all stupid, eats dog food etc, because she can't take her eyes off the stupid show.  I guess I should be thankful they don't show her driving.. 

Well, there is another ad showing a woman mowing her lawn while watching TLC.

Edited January 14, 2017 by smittykins

[OSM Mom]

And when she walks into the street, I want her to get hit by a bus.  

[peacheslatour]

Oh, they're drainers.

Oh, you're a bitch.

[Ubiquitous]

On ‎12‎/‎12‎/‎2016 at 1:26 PM, Drogo said:

The Amazon commercial where Dad buys the kid a Superman costume.

What is the message here?  Kids' friendship can be purchased?  You want the kid to have friends?  Get him a non-Mary-Lou-Retton haircut.   Also the teacher's dress is 4 sizes too small.

The door is completely see-through when they get to school, but when Dad's creeping around outside there's just a clear panel on the top of a solid door.  Who changed the door?  Dad, it can't be said enough, stop creeping around outside the preschool.  Go to to fucking work.

Gawd, I hate that ad! Quit being a helicopter parent, already!

On ‎12‎/‎16‎/‎2016 at 2:55 PM, iMonrey said:

There's a new iPhone commercial that has grade-school children acting out Romeo and Juliet. The commercial begins like a real theatrical film where Romeo and Juliet are around seven years old, acting out the classic balcony scene against a realistic set. Then it turns out one of the dads is filming a school play with his iPhone, which must makes the movie look real. 

Nonetheless . . . why in the hell are grade school children performing Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet? You know they die at the end, right? That is not an appropriate play for children that young to be performing! Never mind the dialogue is way too sophisticated for them to understand, the very basis of the story is inappropriate for children that age. It's just disturbing all around. You'd think the parents would be up in arms the minute they heard the school was putting this play on with their little kids, not showing up to proudly film the damn thing!

I didn't have a problem with the subject matter of the play, just them making oit look like a real play at the beginning.

On ‎12‎/‎28‎/‎2016 at 6:56 PM, SoSueMe said:

Okay, the latest Candy Crush commercial (chick wailing a giant lollipop like a battleaxe) is getting on my last nerve. And the song (song, jingle???) is badly out of tune. The whole thing is annoying.

I hate all those ads with people hallucinating.

[Maverick]

 Lookup 'awkward' in the dictionary and you know what you'll see?  Candance Cameron talking to Charlie Tuna about lunch in a pouch.  

[Cobalt Stargazer]

Iggy Pop's Real Wild Child has now been co-opted by one of those damn Candy Crush knockoff games.  Ugh.

[Ubiquitous]

On ‎12‎/‎31‎/‎2016 at 11:46 PM, iMonrey said:

So I'm watching New Year's Eve Live with Anderson Cooper and Kathy Griffin on CNN, and a commercial for Cologuard is in heavy rotation. It's a cancer screening service where you basically poop in a box and mail it into a lab so they can examine it for signs of colon cancer.

OK. Let me preface this by saying I realize colon cancer is a serious issue. But can I just say . . . EWWWWW? I mean - who has that job? I don't envy them. Also, pity the poor UPS guy who has to pick it up and deliver it. Does he know what's in there? Or, what if you take it to the post office? It's not like you can just slap a stamp on it and put it in the mail box. What if you're standing in line at the post office behind someone trying to mail poop in a box?

I overthink things.

I am not sure, but I think you smear a little stick and send that in a sealed foil envelope, not chunks of your stool.

 

On ‎1‎/‎2‎/‎2017 at 10:55 PM, bubbls said:

Burger King is running some kind of special with male twins yacking on and on about it. One wears glasses. I've been trying to enjoy The Twilight Zone marathon, but they play that idiotic commercial every break it seems. I especially despise commercials that run on and on before they actually get to the details and this is one. Before I looked I thought the two Sonic idiots had begun shilling for BK. 

I liked them better on Cheap Seats.

On ‎1‎/‎3‎/‎2017 at 7:16 PM, Gam2 said:

Just saw the Cascade Platinum commercial for the millionth time. The wife takes the "Alfredo" baking pan out of the dishwasher and hands it to her husband, then takes a bunch of other pans out. Alfredo sauce is NOT RED. It's WHITE. We eat alfredo sauce with pasta all the time.  Can't these people get anything right on these commercials?! 

Ahh, so THAT is what is bugging me about that ad! I can never figure out what it was!

[Archery]

On 1/10/2017 at 10:20 AM, Archery said:

There are local commercials (Boston TV market) advertising the fact that NBC has changed cable channels as of the beginning of the year.  Its logo is 3 xylophone keys, marked N-B-C, which get tapped to sound the three tones that NBC has always used.  The slogan is something like, "same chimes, different channel."  The actual tones are G-E-C (low, high, medium), which would be made by keys in this order:  long, short, medium. 

But in the ad, the xylophone keys go G-C-E, long, medium, short and are tapped left to right -- which would produce this tune instead:  low, medium, high.  It KILLS me that they tap them in order to make the NBC chime, even though that would make an ascending chime that is not at all the tune. 

I know nobody else in the world is aggravated by this, but the cognitive dissonance between watching the keys that are tapped and hearing the tones that are produced makes me want to hit something. 

I know I'm quoting myself, but, OMG! They changed the commercial! Now the mallet strikes the keys in the right tonal order, even though it spells out NCB.  I guess I was not the only one bugged by it. 

[mmecorday]

Quote

Oh, they're drainers.

And probably *gasp* Eastern European drainers who thought they were Eye-talian. 

[cpcathy]

15 hours ago, Maverick said:

 Lookup 'awkward' in the dictionary and you know what you'll see?  Candance Cameron talking to Charlie Tuna about lunch in a pouch.  

This commercial makes me sad that Candace Cameron is a "thing" again.

[AuntiePam]

On 1/14/2017 at 5:02 PM, peacheslatour said:

Oh, they're drainers.

Oh, you're a bitch.

What's a drainer?

[peacheslatour]

41 minutes ago, AuntiePam said:

What's a drainer?

You'd have to see the commercial to really get the sanctimonious sneer in her voice, but a drainer is someone who buys inferior brands of fruit cup that are in syrup. She only buys superior fruit cups in which the fruit is in juice so instead of draining it, they drink it.. This. Is. A. Big. Deal.

Edited January 16, 2017 by peacheslatour

[cpcathy]

I thought you were supposed to eat the fruit and then throw away the rest!

[Jamoche]

Anti-DirectTV ad:

Dear sound tech guy. You are a sound tech. It's not your job to fact-check the DirectTV spokesguy doing the pitch. Yeah, he's obnoxious (like a voice actor would really care that much about the product he's pitching), but so are you.

[smittykins]

I just saw a Daily Burn commercial with a woman bragging "I went from a size 8 to a size 2."

OH NOES!  Size 8! Fatty fat fat!  Tub o'lard!

[peacheslatour]

6 minutes ago, smittykins said:

I just saw a Daily Burn commercial with a woman bragging "I went from a size 8 to a size 2."

OH NOES!  Size 8! Fatty fat fat!  Tub o'lard!

I hope they didn't show her before picture! Oh, the huge manatee!

[Brattinella]

Seriously, you can't be happy being a size 8??  I think I'll just kill myself now.

[bilgistic]

Damn, I guess I'm a disgusting troll. I can only dream of a size eight.

Edited January 17, 2017 by bilgistic

[mojoween]

There is a Credit Karma ad where this chick is excited about an apartment.  First off her "15 minute drive to work" tune would probably be fine if your friend did it, but since I don't know her it's annoying.

Second, the way she tilts her head and says "credit score?" like a dog asked to do algebra makes me want to hit her.  

I get it.  Not everyone thinks that an apartment complex is going to run a credit check but not even considering that possibility?  Shut your hole.

[Ubiquitous]

Is that the one in which the second bitch grabs her friends iphone and tosses it away so she doesn't check her credit score the "wrong way"?

[IrishPirate]

Cascade dishwasher soap. The lady pulls dirty dishes out of the machine because they're too dirty to wash. First thing out is a 9" x 13" pan that had "Alfredo" in it. But the pan has tomato sauce remnants and Alfredo is a white cream sauce.

[Cobalt Stargazer]

2 hours ago, IrishPirate said:

Cascade dishwasher soap. The lady pulls dirty dishes out of the machine because they're too dirty to wash. First thing out is a 9" x 13" pan that had "Alfredo" in it. But the pan has tomato sauce remnants and Alfredo is a white cream sauce.

And this was after the guy in the ad had loaded the washer for her, trying to be helpful. Lady, don't wonder why he doesn't help around the house more often if you're trailing along behind him correcting the way he does things.

[Prevailing Wind]

Quote

Seriously, you can't be happy being a size 8??  I think I'll just kill myself now.

I guess it depends. If she's only 2'7", it might be a problem.

[Jamoche]

9 hours ago, IrishPirate said:

Cascade dishwasher soap. The lady pulls dirty dishes out of the machine because they're too dirty to wash. First thing out is a 9" x 13" pan that had "Alfredo" in it. But the pan has tomato sauce remnants and Alfredo is a white cream sauce.

Plus the soap doesn't really matter, it's better washer technology that lets you get away with not pre-washing.

[cpcathy]

9 hours ago, Cobalt Stargazer said:

And this was after the guy in the ad had loaded the washer for her, trying to be helpful. Lady, don't wonder why he doesn't help around the house more often if you're trailing along behind him correcting the way he does things.

Bitch, just go eat a yogurt and drain your fruit cup.

[Prevailing Wind]

I make my DW soap - half borax & half Arm & Hammer "washing soda" - use a TBS per load and it works well.

[xaxat]

Oh great. A profit maximizing corporation is telling me I need to get right with God?

(Adds new entry on Companies to Boycott list.)

[Silver Raven]

11 minutes ago, xaxat said:

 

Oh great. A profit maximizing corporation is telling me I need to get right with God?

(Adds new entry on Companies to Boycott list.)

A local lawyer here in the Sacramento area runs ads half of the time advertising his services, and half of the time telling us to call his office and they will pray with us.

[TattleTeeny]

Don't hate me, everyone, but I laughed at a Sonic commercial. The passenger guy said he was not a millennial (obviously) but a perennial. Driver guy is all WTF? and then passenger says it's because people think he's dead and then he shows up again. I don't know--the really casual, offhand way he mentions that people think he's dead is funny to me.

Also just hear a commercial for the show Bones; why the fuck does the announcer say the word "bones" like that? Like bownes (as in "bow" rhymes with "now").

Edited January 18, 2017 by TattleTeeny

[iMonrey]

I know this has been hashed to death but the lady in the Liberty Mutual commercial who complains that her insurance company will only pay three quarters of what it will cost to fix her car not only doesn't understand how insurance works, she also doesn't understand how cars work, apparently. "I guess they don't want you driving three quarters of a car!" Um, what? 

Look lady, you can't take your car in for repairs and have it returned to you only three quarters fixed, or, worse yet, three quarters intact, just because you can only pay three quarters of the cost. They're either going to fix it, or not, period. Nobody fixes three quarters of it when you tell them you can only pay 75% of the price. You either put it on your credit card and pay installments, or you walk away. Those are your choices.

Bottom line, if you see this lady driving down the street? Make a quick U-Turn and drive in the other direction as quickly as possible. No wonder her car needs fixing.