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OutDaughtered - General Discussion


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Here are my thoughts on the first episode:

They really seem to not only love each other but like each other as well.

Those babies are adorable.

I hope their marriage survives not only 6 daughters but having a reality show.

Finally, HOW did they afford all that travel...yes, I am jealous.

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(edited)

Same sentiment as CoolMom....they seem like a great couple, but have set themselves up for failure by being on a realty show.  One season and go, save your family!

Edited by AnnieGirl
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I agree; they seem like a really fun, down-to-earth couple, but I hope they don't sell their family's privacy and well-being for the almighty dollar.  Honestly, I'm not sure I can keep watching just for this reason.

Also, the mom (Danielle?) looks absolutely amazing after carrying and delivering quints!

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(edited)

They've already sold out their family for money.  They seem likeable so far but we're only one episode in.  I can never fully like somebody who exploit their kids for money but we'll see. 

They need to give her mom and sister a break and hire some help if she can't do it on her own.  Did I hear correctly that the sister puts her own kids to bed and then goes and helps take care of the babies all night?   The poor grandma was exhausted to the point of tears so they need to hire some help in my opinion. 

The babies are cute.  There, I'm not totally negative. 

Edited by Maharincess
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I am surprise to see that they don't have any outside help, given the support and generosity that is usually extended to family with multiples. It broke my heart hearing the grandmother lament about her exhaustion and lack of sleep. 

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(edited)

Tonight changed my mind. I don't like this couple anymore.   The way Danielle acted when nobody signed up for their calendar thing seemed entitled to me.

 The rest of the episode was nothing but a money grab.  I hate people who have so many kids and then beg everybody to take care of and support them.  Anybody who has internet knows that some kinds of fertility intervention can lead to high order multiples,  if you can't support them without begging for donations and/or exploiting the kids on television, don't take the risk.  

I haven't been to their blog but I can pretty much guarantee that there is a link to donate to them. 

The dad did one of my worst pet peeves when he kept talking about getting "pitchers" taken.  I think he also said that a "phertographer" contacted him.  I bet he posted the selfies then tagged a bunch of photographers and said he wishes they could afford professional pitchers. 

Edited by Maharincess
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I didn't think Danielle seemed entitled. Just disappointed. It reminded me of when my kids and I signed up to do a charity walk and no one sponsored or donated to our team. No one. It's like you're excited about something and you think it will be a good idea, and then you realize no one else is really into it. Ooops. 

I thought the care chart was a great idea. Fact is, they need help. It can sometimes to be really hard to ask for help, even though I'm sure there are plenty of people who would love to help them. (I would totally help them if they lived in my area!) So having her sister make this chart and send it to people is kind of an easier way of reaching out and seeing if people can help.

Personally, I have zero issues with them even asking for, hinting about help. Yes, they knew the risks of multiples, but they are where they are and there's no going back now. There was a time in our society when we were a lot more community minded. People helped each other out, without being asked. It was just what you did. When a neighbor was struggling, others picked up the slack. Now we're all so focused on our own lives, it seems the only "help" we offer is calling CPS if a kid is playing outside along, or offering unwanted advice to the breastfeeding mother in the park. 

Sorry for the rant, but it's just a big thing of mine - how insular and selfish we've become as a society. So I like to see people pitching in to help this family out. I think it's a win-win for everyone, and may even be building stronger bonds between them all. 

I like the family overall, which means I worry for them, being on a reality show. The only part that is uncomfortable is the obvious tension between Dad and Grandma. 

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I decided I don't like this show.  It's too slick.  I don't care for all the blow out diaper talk, feel the dad should thanks his stars for the grandmother, don't like the couple's attitude.  They were doubtless better off as a couple with no kids who traveled a lot.  Is it this couple who insist on a "date" night once a week?  Some couple did recently, and boy that is asking a lot with infants and a toddler.  They maybe need a couple of sitters for a few hours so they can take a nap.

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I don't remember anything about them insisting on a date night. From the two episodes that we've seen, I don't think they've been out together alone. At this point I think they just want help so, yes, they can nap. Or shower. Or pay some more attention to their older daughter. 

I understand the husband's frustration with Grandma. It wasn't like she was late to come help out at the house. She was late to help out at a photography session, where the woman had offered up her services and time for free. She was over an hour late, and from the comments that dad made, it sounds like she is habitually late. Maybe it's just a personal pet peeve, but I cannot stand people like that. It shows that they don't value your time as much as theirs. If the family with their 6 kids, five of whom are infants, can make it there on time - why can't one single adult? 

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13 hours ago, Micks Picks said:

I decided I don't like this show.  It's too slick.  I don't care for all the blow out diaper talk, feel the dad should thanks his stars for the grandmother, don't like the couple's attitude.  

I don't particularly care for this couple.  They come across as entitled and ungrateful.   Seems to me that the father was a little rough with the grandmother, considering his family doesn't seem to be around. 

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I'd be a little upset too when Danielle's mom showed up an hour and a half late.  No contact? Or she half ass lied and said she sent a text, "they must of not have gotten it". 

The first or second episode they showed them going to bed and he was asking her if she remembered to take her pill. Were they talking about BC pills?  Because next episode Adam goes to look into a vasectomy.  Didn't they end up with quints because of infertility? I can understand not wanting anymore and there still could be a surprise pregnancy, though not likely, just wondering why they keep pushing the birth control issue so much?

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(edited)

There is nothing special here. They are not funny, quirky, interesting - they just exist and have 6 kids. Ummm ok. This is more a one off special than a weekly TV show. Guess they couldn't pass up the money and perks. Not sure the last time I've been so intrigued by a trip to a snow cone bar and a photo shoot *sarcastic tone*

Edited by Boofish
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(edited)

On the shallow end.....I think the dad is kind of hot.  

Scratch that...not kind of hot---he is hot.

I keep wavering...is he or isn't he hot?  He is definitely cute and I love those beautiful piercing eyes.  Want to see his shirt off.  Problem is his nose and mouth is kind of ratty looking.  

Edited by Joan van Snark
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I find them pretty comical actually. I felt for them when little Hazel got sick and being  as I will be waiting 100 years for grandkids, if they were my neighbors,  I could see myself cuddling a few babies floor them when they needed a shower! 

Edited by MarysWetBar
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(edited)

After watching the third episode just now, I've decided that I might enjoy this show.  Maybe.  I'm definitely conflicted.  On one hand, they're a young one-income couple with a ton of kids who made the decision to sign on with TLC to make some much-needed money.  Or, phrased another way, they sold their souls and their kids' privacy to the devil in the name of the almighty dollar.  I'll have to make up my mind over the next couple of weeks just how culpable I want to feel when their marriage inevitably crumbles in the event that they become very famous.

Adam and his wife seem like decently likeable people, even if he is a bit immature.  Some of the situations feel very staged, such as him spending too much money and being lectured by the Nagging Wife Character™ about how their lives have changed.  Or the Wild n' Sassy Grandma Character™ showing up late and pissing off the Crabby Hubby Character™, who actually dares to become vocal about it (*gasp*).  Or when they feel slighted and abandoned when no one signs up on the chore chart, but then, after a conveniently-placed commercial break, all is well again when everyone and their brother sign up ("We have the bestest friends ever!").  The patented TLC mathematical formula of reality show production (cute kids + manufactured zany hijinks = ratings) will kick in before we know it.  I'll give it one or two more episodes and see where I land (i.e. how willing I will be to turn a blind eye to the TLC bullshit).

Edited by SuzyLee
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Yea, we will see how this family fairs after being on reality TV. If they leave after a season or 2 and bank the money for the kids, cool. If they're in our faces for the next 10 years, airing every embarrassing preteen moment while the parents go through a nasty divorce ala the Gosselins, I'll have zero respect. 

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On 5/18/2016 at 10:41 PM, Maharincess said:

 

So, when one of the kids needs to go to the Dr, it's a HUGE!! PROBLEM!!! Because who's going to babysit?!?! What ever will they do?      Then they show them shopping, out to dinner and doing other things without the kids.  

It looks like next week is them hinting for a new house.  

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At first they seem like a personable couple. However they are very unrealistic to mourn for their days before the quints were born. How do they not get that their time is 100% dedicated to the babies. I don't feel sorry for them. It's the older daughter Blayke that I feel badly for. Time with her parents .... gone. The latest episode where the wife demands her husband get a vasectomy or no sex?  Ultimatums of any kind are not good for a marriage. I don't know whether I can keep watching this show. Especially if her shrewish mother keeps showing up. She was there for spa day yet her daughter doesn't call her first when she needed someone to look after all the other babies and Blayke while she takes the sick one to see the doctor. Thank goodness for her sister. Danielle seems very spoiled. 

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Whelp, that kid Blake's life is over...say gaaa bye to feeling special or important :/

Also, why arent they shopping at a warehouse store like Costco? There has to be something fairly nearby. 

I get a kick out of the Grandma...yeah she is a pain in the ass, but Im proud of her for not bailing them out all the time.

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I think people that do this are really selfish.  This does not happen naturally,  and now they expect everyone to drop everything to cater to them.  Good luck with that :/

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2 hours ago, Christi said:

I think people that do this are really selfish.  This does not happen naturally,  and now they expect everyone to drop everything to cater to them.  Good luck with that :/

They also expect complete strangers to fund this life and these kids that they had.   People like this know the risk of getting multiples but I think a lot of them see the free stuff people like the wretched Kate Gosselin got and they want the same. 

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It doesn't happen naturally, but it also doesn't always result in 5 babies. Otherwise all the women I've known over the years who've had to do IVF (and sadly, I've known a lot) would have a lot more babies than they do. I just can't hate on people for choosing that route when they're struggling with fertility. I'm sure they didn't intend to have 5 babies, but they're here now and if people want to help them out, good for them. 

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12 hours ago, Maharincess said:

They also expect complete strangers to fund this life and these kids that they had.   People like this know the risk of getting multiples but I think a lot of them see the free stuff people like the wretched Kate Gosselin got and they want the same. 

A huge pet peeve of mine.  I can understand why folks would opt not to selectively reduce (religious concerns aside), but they knew what they were getting into.  I don't like what sites like Go Fund Me have done to the way some people think about and plan for the future.  I also found it really off-putting when they expressed frustration with the fact that too few people signed up for a slot on their round-the-clock chore chart.  I can't imagine expecting other people to help me raise the babies I chose to have (not counting extremely close friends and family- and only if they choose to lend a hand).  The real loser in all of this is the older girl.  I hope someone remembers to make a special effort to help her feel important as the years go by.

Edited by SuzyLee
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(edited)

I hope this family is doing okay.  I saw a couple of episodes and liked the characters, but it seemed like they are really in over their heads.  They don't seem to understand that long term lack of sleep is not for the children's welfare.  You can't provide good care, when you are stretched too thin.  Just saying you are going to do it, isn't very realistic.  I would think daily, reliable care, that does not consist of out of town family members or friends who take off their jobs, would be mandatory.  I would think there are places to go for help.  

Edited by SunnyBeBe
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(edited)

I caught a lot of the marathon last night, and I've got to say I'm in the camp with those who find people who purposely have "litters" incredibly selfish.  I really don't like their attitude towards Grandma.  Yes, it is annoying that she is late or this or that, but she's bailing your ass out, so STFU.  If it's so annoying, don't involve her. 

I missed part of the show towards the end, but I was totally confused about the drama of getting Blayke to school.  For God sake, why would you load five babies into the car just to take her to school when you could probably easily find a classmate's parent who would be willing to take her.

Edited by tobeannounced
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I love this show.  I really like the couple, but the mother in law bugs me.  Danielle is more mature than her mother is.  The chore chart is a great idea, that way people can help out if they want, but since they aren't being directly asked to help, they don't have to feel bad for not helping.

I wouldn't care how infertile I was, if I had 6 kids, I wouldn't let my husband anywhere near me without a vasectomy.  I loved what they told the doctor when they were researching the vasectomy.  He asked how many kids they had, and they replied "6"....then he asked how many they wanted, and they replied "6".  Good answer.

I don't mind them asking for freebies, they aren't holding a gun to anyone's head. If you don't want to help out, then don't.  Btw, that photographer was magical with the babies.  Wow.

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The real estate agent is impossibly bad.  First, open houses don't sell homes.  They get new clients for the agent and not much else (this, from my RE selling son in law).  Second, showing them a house outside their price range as the first house is just plain cruel.  They can't afford that, even if it does fit their needs.  Irresponsible and unprofessional on the agent's part.

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I still don't like these people.  I hate all the "help me" they expect.  In Houston people were to sign up at all hours of the night and day.  Nice organization on the parents' parts but not so good for the volunteers.  Now maybe move back home so they can get family help.   Nice they got to travel the world as a parentless couple, but I don't need hear about it.  Not my fav at all.

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I'm not liking this couple.  The husband seems ok, the wife.......shades of Gosselin.  

"I'm not making enough money to pay for this house" husband says..........."We will make it work" wifey says.  Right.  Ridiculous.  

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2 hours ago, Micks Picks said:

I still don't like these people.  I hate all the "help me" they expect.  In Houston people were to sign up at all hours of the night and day.  Nice organization on the parents' parts but not so good for the volunteers.  Now maybe move back home so they can get family help.   Nice they got to travel the world as a parentless couple, but I don't need hear about it.  Not my fav at all.

I don't like them either.  Tonight's episode with the house hunting seemed to me to be "OK...how many of you suckers out there are going to help us buy a house?" 

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14 hours ago, Honey said:

don't mind them asking for freebies, they aren't holding a gun to anyone's head. If you don't want to help out, then don't.  Btw, that photographer was magical with the babies.  Wow.

I agree. And I don't even see them as asking for "freebies", but they openly admit they need some help and are grateful for it. I don't see it as a big deal. 

It makes me sad how insular we have become as a society. I remember when I was growing up, people in our neighborhood were always helping each other out. And it wasn't that everyone was friends, but that's just what my parents (and the others) felt was the neighborly way. They drove each other's kids to school, watched pets while families went on vacation. I remember my mom driving a neighbor's elderly father to a doctor's appointment, because the neighbor had a real estate showing she couldn't get out of. They weren't really friends, but people didn't feel bad about asking for help. When new babies were born, everyone pitched in and made  meals and watched older kids. 

These days, as I'm a parent, I see so many people who are overwhelmed. There's this whole notion that you have to "do it all" and be proud of yourself for being a mother, a worker, an assistant down at the school, etc. etc. It's insane. No wonder everyone is so stressed out, depressed, anxious, etc. I don't think we were meant to do it all on our own. That's why communities formed in the first place, so people could pool their resources. I'd like to see a time when people don't feel guilt for asking for help. 

And you're absolutely right, no one has to help if they don't want to. I think this family has people in their life who would truly LOVE to help. But they don't always know what needs to be done, so I thought the chart was a great way to remove the awkwardness for everyone. No matter how they got into this situation, the babies are here now, and NO ONE is served well if the parents are at the end of their rope. 

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I wish Danielle would get some professional advice. Her wants, needs and demands are all over the place. Adam can't even hint his resistance without a strong comeback from her let alone tell her no for anything. I wonder if she's having some post partum depression. She's trying to take care of six children and make all decisions on her own. Whatever she wants she gets...or else...

Those babies are just the cutest, though.

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I just don't get the whole moving back home discussion.  Yes, it would be more help with the babies.  HOWEVER, they still need an INCOME to pay for everything and Adam's job (well paying, it seems) is in Houston.  Unless there is an equally high paying job in Louisiana for him, it only makes sense to stay in Texas.  Right?  Am I the only one that sees this? 

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No, that I agree with. It doesn't seem prudent to move back home right now. But I can see it as a long term goal. They would have more help, and I would imagine the home prices/cost of living might be more affordable there? But yes, if he has a job with actual projects coming in right now (what does he do?) they need that. I'd start looking into him transferring, find another job before I'd just decide I want to move back home. 

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They haven't investigated the level of income they might be able to make, moving back home.  Not sure about the economics of it, but in smaller towns there is typically (not always) a benefit to the cost of living over living in a larger city.  However, the kind of work he does may be unavailable, as tabloidleover mentioned.  Until they do the total research, it's not fair to completely eliminate the possibility.

There's another thought here:  the babies won't be babies for long and the amount of work may not change, but the kind of work will change.  The pressure to keep up with the demands of premies is unrelenting, but as they grow and become more self-sufficient, even the ability to hold one's own bottle represents a major milestone and reduction of effort.

The point here is, for Mom, she's experiencing some depression - not uncommon in new moms and certainly more prevalent with multiples.  The whole thing is overwhelming and, at the end of the day, no matter how wonderful her husband is, the bulk of the work falls to her.  And it never seems to end.

In watching the scenes of the dedication ceremony at church, there were more than enough people there that would have the time and inclination to assist.  Because of the sheer volume of people, no one would be 'put upon' to help more than once a week.  That's a level of support I hadn't seen available to her in Houston and these are people she's known all her life.

I don't know if this show will be back, but while his job could be less available in Lake Charles, her job is always going to be with her and for a very long time.  Some consideration has to be given to the support she needs, along with consideration as to how he supports the family.

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13 hours ago, goldensglitter said:

"I'm not making enough money to pay for this house" husband says..........."We will make it work" wifey says.  Right.  Ridiculous.

I think a lot of that is due to the reality TV convention that they don't seem to be allowed to talk about the money they make from the show which I'm sure was at least enough to make a nice down payment on a larger house. Also, their website "It's a buzz world" has ads on it, which is another income source, although I'm not sure how much that could be. Between Adam's job, TLC money, money from website ads, probably some other sources we don't know about, and hopefully some equity from their existing house, they are able to make it work. They're just not allowed to talk about exactly how.

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I love this family and this show.   I can't even snark on them.   This is a huge adjustment and they're just doing their best to make it work.    It's so evident that thy both are in love with each other, which is so nice to see.  I love the brother in laws too. They all seem to have a great sense of humor.  I hope this series is renewed.  I'd love to see these munchkins grow up.

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I don't blame Danielle for wanting to move home. I can't imagine day in and day out with 5 babies. I would die. They probably can't afford a daily nanny to help on one income. I think they seem to be doing amazing considering they have 6 kids, 5 of whom are the same age. When they had to have help just so they could talk to the realtor, I think that indicates the colossal amount of work they have to do each second of each day.

I didn't realize that her family lived to far away. Maybe the compromise would be to move to a middle point- an hour from home, and an hour from his work? Then family will be closer and the Dad would have a manageable commute to Houston....( kind of) Lake Charles doesn't seem to be a booming metropolis but they are in over their heads.  

She is probably thinking ahead to the toddler years and is getting freaked out. Things are easier when they don't move, I would imagine.

I really enjoy this family they seem normal, realistic and I think they do a good job with trying to include Blake and make her feel special and they say repeatedly that this is a major concern for them. I think what is more likely is the quints will always be lumped in as the quints and Blake will be fine haha. 

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I don't know if moving an hour inbetween each would help, though. You'd have no one immediately nearby. If you needed help, you'd have to wait an hour. Whereas now, at least she has the sister and BIL in the same town, and supposedly some friends. Double that for back in Lake Charles. Help would just be minutes away. 

I do think in some ways it would be harder as they're mobile, but right now my biggest stress would be - you literally cannot go anywhere without help. All those carseats! It's not like you can carry 2 inside the doctor's office, then go back out for 2 more, etc. You have to have someone with you at all times. While help will still probably be necessary as they get older, but at leas they can move themselves. You COULD conceivably run somewhere alone if you needed to. Now she is basically trapped. 

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(edited)
On 6/2/2016 at 3:50 PM, winnter said:

I love this family and this show.   I can't even snark on them.   This is a huge adjustment and they're just doing their best to make it work.    It's so evident that thy both are in love with each other, which is so nice to see.  I love the brother in laws too. They all seem to have a great sense of humor.  I hope this series is renewed.  I'd love to see these munchkins grow up.

I liked the brothers in law too, they reminded me so much of my own brothers in law. 

I hope it's not picked up for a second season, I hate to see more kids being exploited and having their childhood be ruined by having it on TV.  I will never respect a parent who exploits their children for money. I hope this is a one and done show. 

I don't understand the talk about moving home and having so much help.  Don't her mom and sisters live near them?  

I'm still having issues with their "poor us, we need this but can't afford it" hints for donations but I like the couple more than I liked Jon and Kate. So far, we're still really early in the show.  

I only watched part of this episode, I fast forwarded past the church stuff, church makes me itch.   I wonder how much they made in "love offerings" when they were there.  

Edited by Maharincess
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1 hour ago, Maharincess said:

Don't her mom and sisters live near them?  

No, Danielle's Mom and one sister live in Lake Charles, as does Adam's family. The only family in the Houston area where Adam and Danielle live is Danielle's sister Ashley.

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So, these people need all this help for free, but have 5, FIVE of those Momma Roo seat things. Those summers are a few hundred bucks a piece. I can't afford one for ONE kid. I have no sympathy. You need a bigger house, so you go look at a dream home basically in my opinion that is decked out to the max, and you say you can "make it work", aka, you think your "church" is going to GIVE you more stuff, like that van you were gifted. 

 

 

So basically they did something irresponsible, because normal fertility treatments don't produce high order multiples, and then get given really, really nice things, and you are still like, gimme gimme gimme. 

 

Maybe I'm bitter. We have three kids. My husband works hard and we make good money and I still don't have these brand spanking new fancy things, just because.  They scream entitled. 

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I was wondering about the whole IUI thing. I know how IVF works, but are mutiples common in IUI? Is there a way to lessen the risk? IE with IVF if you are responsible you only put in two or one fertilized eggs vs ocotmons 8 eggs

With IUI dont they like trigger an egg release with hormones then insert sperm? Could they conceivably control how many eggs are released? Or am I totally not understanding IUI?

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I seesaw back and forth between liking the couple and hating their not-so-subtle hints for more stuff.  I have to say poor Adam looked absolutely overwhelmed and terrified when they first started looking at houses.  I was confused though when they went to LA and he was grumpy about Danielle (?) wanting to move home now that he had landed two big accounts that would easily pay for a big, shiny, new house.

Are her two sisters twins?

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I live in the same city as the Busbys, so I've watched this show with interest. I can't help but like them. I do not know them personally, but we have many mutual friends through their church and I have never heard a bad word spoken about them. Danielle is very involved with a local moms of multiples groups and frequently donates baby equipment and clothing that the girls have outgrown. She is well liked around here. None of the behind the scenes stories like I used to hear about the Gosselins. The girls are adorable and on their blog they seem like very involved parents who are always interacting with the girls. I think this says a lot as well.

As much as I like this couple, the show did irritate me at times. It felt like they were forcing the parents to follow certain story lines. Hazel is sick? OMG, disaster! How will they handle it?? And the house. Real estate records show that the listing price was $410k for their house, not $450 like the show said. Danielle also wrote a blog post about how the builder worked with them and made it affordable for them. Maybe I'm jaded on house prices, but a house that will fit 8 people through the teen years that is no doubt under $400k? That doesn't seem extravagant to me, especially since they said they had a good amount of equity in their first house. I know for a fact that Adam has a good job + the TLC money, so I don't think this was a stretch. Obviously they will have many future expenses for 6 children, but I don't think the house was a poor decision.

Just 2 more things. 1) Since the show finished filming Danielle's other sister (yes, her 2 sisters are twins) has moved to the same neighborhood as Danielle and the other sister. All 3 of them within half a mile. I love that they have a close enough relationship to want that. And 2) This show makes League City seem MUCH nicer than it is. Yes, their neighborhood is nice but League City itself is sort of dumpy and TLC does a great job of hiding it.

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On 6/6/2016 at 11:22 AM, yogi2014L said:

I was wondering about the whole IUI thing. I know how IVF works, but are mutiples common in IUI? Is there a way to lessen the risk? IE with IVF if you are responsible you only put in two or one fertilized eggs vs ocotmons 8 eggs

With IUI dont they like trigger an egg release with hormones then insert sperm? Could they conceivably control how many eggs are released? Or am I totally not understanding IUI?

UIU treatment stimulates the ovaries to release multiple mature eggs, at the same time giving the sperm a "head start", allowing for easier fertilization.  Other than reducing the amount of embryos there isn't much you can do.  They seem like a religious couple, so that was probably never considered.

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