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S20.E11: The Finale / S20.E12: After The Final Rose


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I would love, love, love (love x1000000000) if the Bachelorette or Bachelor was a POC.  It's a damn shame it couldn't be Caila for the diversity factor but the reaction to Caila on Twitter seemed to be very negative.  It's really too bad.  Caila's strange, robotic, repressed way of dealing or not dealing with her emotions freaked me out almost constantly -- I couldn't follow any of it.  

 

Yeah its a shame for whatever reason that TPTB zeroed in on Caila as their "diversity" prospect but she had so many problems connecting with the public, starting with that crazy ass story that she broke up with her boyfriend after seeing Ben on TV.  so no surprise she was dumped for the more popular JoJo as there was no way they could trot out such an unpopular choice.

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Ben and Lauren look soo uncomfortable with each other! I'm glad Jo Jo got out of that, but I feel like she was so much more sincere. 

 

Also, i really did not like how Chris Harrison kept asking BEN what HE wanted to do and didn't ask Lauren or them as a couple. How bout it Ben, you want to get married tonight, its completely up to YOU. Who cares if Lauren wants to or not. Oyy whatever.

 

ETA: JoJo is Persian (I thought?), so that helps bring some diversity in my opinion. I'm excited to see her season

Edited by WiCkedWitCh
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Aw, I liked Mr. Higgins's speach about the family. I wonder which Bachelorette show castoff Lauren's sister is going to hook up with at the next Bachelor Family mixer? I hope she gets together with someone good--like an Arie, not a Bukowski!

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Damn you Fleiss  

 

Just when I think I can escape Bachelor Nation you go and cast JoJo as The Bachelorette

 

Now I am going to be glued to Reality Steve and to my TV for the next several months

 

If the Great American Novel does not get written, or I do not lose 20 pounds, it's on you Fleiss and your dastardly ways

 

(Secretly doing the happy dance while eating Ben and Jerry's Chubby Hubby and laughing with my cats)

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I watched tonight's episode with my 20-year old niece. It was the first time she's seen the show, so I kept apologizing to her for dragging her down. 

 

She was not impressed.

 

It probably didn't help that I kept saying, "That's scripted. And this, this exchange? Scripted. And this? Fake." Etc.

 

We were both appalled that any pastor would endorse a last minute wedding plan.

 

If I was taking this show seriously, I'd say that I think Ben and Jojo were closer; he WAS more "himself" with her (whatever that means). He seemed to have more substantial conversations with Jojo than with Lauren. Also, Jojo was right on target in being responsive to him, and I never saw that from Lauren. But maybe we just weren't shown that.

 

As a straight lady, my vote is Jojo is prettier and hotter than Lauren. She was just beautiful on ATFR. And for as much I consider this entire franchise a trainwreck and terribly exploitative and demeaning to women, I think Jojo is a great choice for Bachelorette. Much better than weirdo Caila, who is SO OFF.

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Very hard to convince us all to care about Caila after witnessing JoJo's duping and dumping.  Plus, JoJo was so subdued about getting over her heartbreak that I sensed a Bachelorette announcement coming fast.  Well, that will be a very fun season as she is a really really really great choice for a lead. 

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The Scary Brother of Jojo will bring so much excitement and drama, my friend and I who watch together every Monday are besides ourselves with giddiness.  The only way it would be more exciting is if it was Jubilee so this is the second best case scenario for fun and drama.  They better cast guys who are at least somewhat approaching how hot Jojo is -- Ben was nowhere close.

 

The random shots of the pastor were so ridiculous and funny.  Even when Jojo was announced as Bachelorette?  My friend said they couldn't even provide him with a chair.

Edited by Ms Blue Jay
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Oh no, looks like Lauren has gone the way of Emily, Becca, et al and gotten veneers. She was doing weird things with her lips and sucking and licking her teeth.

How will Ben stand the S's? To me it's unbearable to listen to.

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Ben wasn't in love with JoJo.. he was having intense lust for her.   I think a lot of men let their little heads overwhelm their thoughts, feelings and decision making.  He couldn't say goodbye to JoJo because he was passionately, physically attracted to her and what he loved was the sex.  

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Sorry, I can't buy that she was so in love with Ben, but wants to be the  Bachelorette just a few months later.  I can't blame her, free trips and men fawning all over you...and the PUBLICITY!   Yeah I got the call. I was watching Supergirl and Major Crimes, but I hear Lauren fixed her hair for the show...at least that's something.

 

Anymore  than I can believe you are in love with two people, but suddenly you know which one is THE ONE, enough to propose. 

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Lauren's teeth still seemed too yellow to be true veneers. They also seemed similarly shaped to the proposal scenes. I think she got Botox near her cheeks to accentuate the dimples. Her upper lip didn't seem to move all that much and seemed oddly stiff without the look of lip plumber.

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Someone once posted that the bachelorette spot was Caila's to lose and that's exactly what happened. Her aloofness and difficultly in expressing herself lost her support. I was hoping it would be her but I'm ok with JoJo and think it will be a good season. Let's hope anyway. I start out with high hopes and then the show always throws us some curve balls. Should be interesting at least. Also I will have to say this show was probably the most dramatic ever but simply because of the fact that they broke an almost perfect record with giving the bachelorette spot to the F2 lady.

 

Regarding Ben's mom, I wonder if she has any reservations about him picking Lauren? She seemed happen for him tonight but it could have been trying to put a good face on it. Obviously the clip of her preferring JoJo was leaked somehow and was never meant to be aired. That's why it was took down only 1 day after being posted.

Edited by yorklee2
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The time they had to fill at the end was weird.  I can't imagine they actually thought there'd be a wedding.  That suggests to me that the selection of JoJo really was a last-minute decision.  They'd probably planned on a whole additional segment to introduce the Bachelorette.  But that became unnecessary since they'd already had JoJo out for the confrontation with Ben scene.

 

And Ben's demeanor during that confrontation was sort of dickish, to me at least.  He seemed way more concerned about validating his own feelings, and having his feelings validated by everyone there, than he did about JoJo's feelings.

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I think JoJo will make a good Bachelorette.  She's dynamic, expresses herself well, and has a guy's energy which plays nicely when put in the role of being the aggressor/selector especially in a room full of testosterone.  

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Jojo seems nice enough but I never connected with her. I think she and her family just like to be on tv. Really never saw anything between her and Ben till the last couple episodes.

And what pastor who has known Ben well and has a whole church watching back home, would insta- marry a couple when we all just saw him test drive 3 models in the fantasy suite, and only barely chose the woman he did. I'm embarrassed for their families, too, to see their kids doing this and act so proud.

Lauren, her dad, and brothers are so very elfin!

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The time they had to fill at the end was weird.  I can't imagine they actually thought there'd be a wedding.  That suggests to me that the selection of JoJo really was a last-minute decision.  They'd probably planned on a whole additional segment to introduce the Bachelorette.  But that became unnecessary since they'd already had JoJo out for the confrontation with Ben scene.

 

And Ben's demeanor during that confrontation was sort of dickish, to me at least.  He seemed way more concerned about validating his own feelings, and having his feelings validated by everyone there, than he did about JoJo's feelings.

That is exactly what I read in his blogs, validating and justifying his feelings, while trying to make the women look a certain way, and paint himself as the good guy, "just trying to do the best I can. " 

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I think there was definitely some buyer's remorse there.

 

Of course, when you think you're "in love" with two different women at the same time, it means you aren't in love with either, but are just infatuated, in lust, whatever.  I'd like to hope that Ben's parents had the good sense to explain that to him at the time.

 

You know the old saying, "no matter how hot a woman is, there's a guy out there who thinks she's a pain-in-the-ass"?  Well, during filming Ben only got to see and deal with the hot side of both ladies.  Since filming, he's had to deal with the pain-in-the-ass side of Lauren.  So I'm not surprised that JoJo is looking better and better to him.

 

But it would've been the same had his decision gone the other way.  

 

Ben's a child.

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Listen producers,just because a guy says he's so in love, he'd marry the girl tomorrow, doesn't mean you have to get all excited about pushing an instant wedding ceremony on them. There's one obvious reason: he isn't the only one getting married, you know? I never heard Lauren say, "I'd marry him tomorrow!" She made a big statement about only getting married once in her life, and I can't imagine she wouldn't have some personal plans for her wedding. Nothing wrong if she wants a formal gown and a band and flowers and a party. Or if he really does. Or if both of them are secretly expecting a big wedding special on the TV, like Sean and Catherine.

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The pressure for an AFTR wedding was sort of awkward and gross, but I guess you could apply those terms to the whole premise of the show, yet here we are, so...  Still, how would it be legal if it were truly a surprise? Unless they just went through with the ceremony and got the license later... I remember Brad pushing for an insta-marriage to Emily but she was still stewing about his closeness to the runner up that season. Eventually, Fleiss and Chris Harrison will probably make it happen.

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"Youre my person" Blah. Maybe I'm bitter, but that just didn't do it for me.

 

And wasn't that a thing from BiP that Carly and Kirk were saying to each other?  It's not even original to this franchise much less in general. 

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my vote is Jojo is prettier and hotter than Lauren.

I honestly never thought Lauren was all that attractive. Cute but too many things off with her face to be considered beautiful. I agree also that her speech and the odd way she emphasizes her S's was irritating.

 

With JoJo, as another poster commented, I had a hard time warming up to her also. When her spunk and warmth started to come through I started to like her. Her reaction when Ben told her he loved her was 100% genuine and endearing. I only hope that she allows her spunk and vitality to come through without resorting to Kaitlyn 2.0 and shows more dignity and class.

Edited by yorklee2
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Listen producers,just because a guy says he's so in love, he'd marry the girl tomorrow, doesn't mean you have to get all excited about pushing an instant wedding ceremony on them. There's one obvious reason: he isn't the only one getting married, you know? I never heard Lauren say, "I'd marry him tomorrow!" She made a big statement about only getting married once in her life, and I can't imagine she wouldn't have some personal plans for her wedding. Nothing wrong if she wants a formal gown and a band and flowers and a party. Or if he really does. Or if both of them are secretly expecting a big wedding special on the TV, like Sean and Catherine.

Of course, nothing less than a special for the "best bachelor ever."  She already told him she did not put up with being shamed on television with the whole "I love two people,"   to get anything less than that,and 1/2 of his paychecks for Dancing with the Stars, etc.   Ben would leave her in a minute if one of these  celebrity Bachelor watchers paid him any attention. 

 

Lauren B. always seemed to me like she was playing the long con game, and I'll bet she milks every bit of attention she can out of this whole process. Something always struck me as false in the two episodes I saw her....and she looks old. Let's face it, she lost me with the hair. 

 

Next we will see them in a reality show going to Bible study or a couples support group with the other Christian Bachelor.  By the way, did  Ben pray or talk to his pastor when he was trying to "find the answer?"  

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Jojo should have been a little more angry. Especially with how he led her on, saying "I can't imagine my life without you." Then the next day proposing to someone else? Ben came out so

 

I get it though that since she's the new Bachelorette she had to be shown over it and at peace. She had to give a party line, it's all great.

 

Surprised about Caila, she seemed to have it all sewn up. Jojo's family will be fun to watch, her brothers and parents meeting the final 2 will be fun. 

 

Jimmy Kimmel was funny!

 

The ending with the family was really natural. Ben does seem happy, relaxed and I think they'll marry.

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I honestly didn't see buyers remorse. Or think Ben was upset at JoJo being bachelorette. I think he looked surprised but I saw some big smiles and clapping. But what do I know?

I do think he prob was bothered by the backlash about telling two women he loved them so he was trying to explain himself somehow. Little Ben was doing his thinking for him towards the end but it was Lauren all along. He needed to come out of his lust haze.

I do prefer JoJo over Caila so I'm pleased with the announcement.

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And wasn't that a thing from BiP that Carly and Kirk were saying to each other? It's not even original to this franchise much less in general.

I first remember the phrase from Grey's Anatomy and I assume it wasn't original there either.

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I honestly didn't see buyers remorse. Or think Ben was upset at JoJo being bachelorette. I think he looked surprised but I saw some big smiles and clapping. But what do I know?

I do think he prob was bothered by the backlash about telling two women he loved them so he was trying to explain himself somehow. Little Ben was doing his thinking for him towards the end but it was Lauren all along. He needed to come out of his lust haze.

I do prefer JoJo over Caila so I'm pleased with the announcement.

 

I am in total agreement with your entire post!  

 

Caila would have been a total snooze as Bachelorette.  I think JoJo will be fun, but I echo yorklee2's sentiment that I hope she shows more class than Kaitlyn.

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I hope that people on social media show more class towards Jojo than they did towards Kaitlyn.

 

Re: Ben and the perception of "Buyer's Remorse".  It's because he was happy except every time anyone asked him about Jojo being the Bachelorette.

 

Chris:  What do you think about it?

Ben:  ......It's good  (some quiet, subdued reaction)

 

Jimmy:  Will you watch Jojo on The Bachelorette?

Lauren:  (yelling)  YAAAAASS.  YAAAAAAAAAS.

Ben:  Uh...... yeah.... (again, a reaction that is barely audible).

That's what I saw and I think it will hold up if you rewatch.

Edited by Ms Blue Jay
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Ben really didn't look happy when they announced JoJo for Bachlorette.

 

He must be feeling unlovable again, because it can't have been true love if she's ready to move on 4 months later. How can Ben get over this? Someone get him some therapy!

 

Oh wait, he's got Lauren. My bad.

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I also didn't see any buyer's remorse, and I think the two of them seem genuinely in love. In fact, I think they've been smitten with each other since the beginning, and that's what led to the "never before" statements of being in love to two women - with Ben so obviously into Lauren B. from the get-go, the producers realized early on that the season was a bust, so they told Ben to pretend to be in love with Jojo just to create drama and suspense, and again, save the season. That's why Lauren seems completely okay after watching Ben proclaim his love for Jojo - she knows it was just for show.

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They definitely seem more serious than a lot of other couples have come off on ATFR.  Bringing the two families up on stage together at least made it appear that this is a real relationship.  And if Lauren is really moving to Denver right away, I believe they are making a go of it.  I live in Denver so I'm going to be on the lookout for them :)  Lace and Leah also live in Denver.. I wonder if there will be any awkward reunions!

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I liked it. Loved Jo (I'm done with the Jojo thing), but I think for Ben it was Lauren from day 1 (hence the "trust me" we learned he told her early on, as in, whatever I have to do for the show, know it will be you at the end). I think there were some late onset feelings for Jo that absent Lauren, might have developed for Ben, and Show decided to run with them to add some drama. I think Jo knew all along she had that second place to overcome and Lauren may have felt her sure-thing was slipping near the end, but it really wasn't. Chemistry is as chemistry does.

I do think Lauren was allowed to show so much more personality in ATFR and on Jimmy Kimmel than we had been permitted to see all season, and I could see why Ben picked her. I don't think Jo was really blindsided, and she was really classy at the end and all through ATFR. Ben too showed a lot of class imo at the end of ATFR when he thanked the show for the experience. I think he and Lauren might be the real deal and I sincerely hope their life is so happy together that we never see them again.:)

Jo will be a great B'ette--had to be a no-brainer to pick her. No way will she turn into another Kaitlyn--I do not believe we heard smutty and worse, not-funny "tight-seal" and "plow the eff out of my field" jokes from her or inappropriate laughter/behavior even once. Ths season was refreshingly 100 percent different from Kaitlyn's circus and I expect Jo's Bachelorette will be too. I hope Caila wasn't really expecting to be the B'ette and isn't overly disappointed.

Edited by MakeMeLaugh
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To be perfectly honest other than the tight shooting schedule I never understood the reasoning the show gave that the F2 didn't have time to get over her heartbreak as opposed to F3 and that's why they always went with F3. I'm not sure the length of time between the third choice being let go and the second but I imagine at the most it would be a month? In the scheme of things what's a month?

One things for certain, going forward it gives the show more leeway to chose and us viewers more room to speculate.

If Ben did have any buyers remorse then it's kind of poetic justice that they made JoJo the bachelorette. Besides she definitely got the better deal. Much better to have your pick of men then have to compete for one.

Edited by yorklee2
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Lauren's brother tweeted this:

Brett Bushnell ‏@brettbushnell  28m28 minutes ago

Couldn't be happier to have @benhiggi as my new older brother

 

Okay, this is kind of cute. They're boring and bland but their families seem to get along, she's moving to Denver in a couple of weeks, and they seem genuinely in love. And if they get married and finally knock Sean Lowe off of the 'holier than thou' pedestal he's placed himself on for being the only Bachelor to marry his F1, then I'm all for it. And thank God JoJo is the Bachelorette instead of Caila. She's going to have every single one of those 25 guys drooling over her. 

Edited by dom16
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Jo will be a great B'ette--had to be a no-brainer to pick her. No way will she turn into another Kaitlyn--I do not believe we heard smutty "tight-seal" jokes from her or inappropriate laughter/behavior even once. Ths season was refreshingly 100 percent different from Kaitlyn's circus and I expect Jo's Bachelorette will be too. I hope Caila wasn't really expecting to be the B'ette and isn't overly disappointed.

I'm the one who made the reference to Kaitlyn in that I hope her spunk and vitality doesn't get misconstrued. I really don't think she'll be anything like Kaitlyn but a lot of comments were made about her implants and her fashion choices that emphasized them. I think she'll keep it classy but this show has a way of editing people in the worst possible light.

I feel kind of sorry for Caila. I think she probably was thinking that since the show had already shot some footage of her in the last couple of weeks. She didn't translate well on tv but I hope she finds what she's looking for.

Now I get why JoJo's parents were there. I wondered what they were doing there because I like most was expecting Lauren to win. They had to be there for JoJo's big announcement as the next b'ette.

Edited by yorklee2
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