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S20.E09: Week 9

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Ben and the final three bachelorettes arrive in Jamaica for their overnight dates. Ben takes one lady on a romantic river raft ride, helps another rescue baby turtles and explores a waterfall with a third. Later, Ben confesses he loves two women and sends one unlucky lady back home.

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Since when is the Bachelor allowed to profess his love before the final rose ceremony?  I have a feeling the producers encouraged Caila to go to Ben to spare him the trouble of having to eliminate her at the rose ceremony.  I believe she was going to ask him whether he knew she wasn't the one before she slept with him.  Too bad she chickened out.   Please don't tell me he is going to pull a "Mesnick".

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It makes me sad that I'd never be allowed on this show, because I don't own a pair of booty shorts. Seriously, Caila and Lauren looked like they were wearing denim underwear. 

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I can't imagine that whichever woman "wins" enjoyed watching this episode tonight. How preposterous that you could tell one woman you loved her and then probably slept with her and then do the exact same thing the next day.

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Something about Caila is so fake. The whole time she was crying in the car I kept thinking, she's doing her audition for the Bachelorette. 

 

And yeah, dumb move, Ben.  You dug yourself a hole there.

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Ben is the worst.  Does he really believe the dribble that is coming out of his mouth!?  Two true loves?!?    Can't wait to see his mom's reaction in two weeks when she hears the news that she could have TWO new daughter in laws.  

 

Caila cried prettily for her bachelorette audition but she should have pulled a Nick and demanded to know why Ben slept with her if she wasn't final 1 for a more dramatic moment.     

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OK how is that these women say they have wanted to tell him for a while that they love him when the show only like 6 weeks? They hardly spend that much alone time with him and they wanted to tell him for a long time that they love him?

Also Caila crying hysterically yet didn't shed one tear.

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I noticed that Caila was the only one who didn't get her hair wet.  Have we ever seen her in anything but a professional-looking blowout?  Has she ever had wet hair?  I knew she'd be the next Bachelorette!

 

Oh, Ben, you ijit.  Let your mom choose the right one.

Edited by WhoAmIReally
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He isn't going to pull a Mesnick. It's a fake out. Probably just calling his parents or something for support and we will hear them on speaker phone saying something like "go with your heart".

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I totally do not believe Caila was emotionally invested - she couldn't even produce a single tear! But it was a good audition for the Bachelorette. And I agree- Ben, you are stupid. Telling them both you are in love with them?? You're going to devastate one and how do you think the one you pick will feel, watching this back??? And you were waaaay too intimate with all 3 in the fantast suite. I feel like I need a shower. This is the time I've felt revulsion watching Ben.

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does anyone else remmeber andy baldwins season?? on his final date with Bevin, he was like " I freakin love you" he said it over and over again. this is not new behavior!! Bevin was super classy about it on the AFTR, even saying some things were "better left unsaid".

I heard Caila say "well he may be waking up with the other women but hell wake up next to me the rest of our life-thats why i couldnt do this show-if you :"win" you have to watch your fiance, guy or girl fooling around with someone else.

I still remember in Tristas season her voiceover that she wished she could put Charlie and Ryan togehter, and you could see they were fooling around in the fantasy suite. I guess Ryan got over it, but that would slay me. of course back in those days they really were separated for months at a time and there was no skype or facetime so everything is different I suppose...

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Jojo with the leg-wrapping again! Did all 3 women wear cutoff jean shorts?

I have always loved how "Chris Harrison" invites them to the fantasy suite!

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I just read an article somewhere else where Chris Harrison was quoted as saying he was shocked by Ben's non-gentlemanly behavior this week.  Uh huh.

 

LMAO, I think my eyeball is going to fall out from giving Chris H the side eye for that one.

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Complete dick move.  So it's going to be that he loves one girl 49% and one girl 51%?  Great, that makes it SO easy to choose the right one. 

 

And I don't think he slept with Caila.  But definitely JoJo and Lauren.  

Edited by leighdear
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How do we know this show isn't competely fabricated? He tells them he loves them because that is the plot for this season. I hate the BS when women and or their family get made when they aren't up front with them. They is only so much the Bachelor can say and they all know that.

Edited by Laurie4H
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What is Caila, chopped liver?  He let her tell him she loved him and wasn't willing to say it back, but still slept with her.  Of course he already knew that she was the one he was going to let go, so for her sake I hope she didn't have sex with him.

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Poor Ben and Little Ben. They are both so brainwashed and confused. I thought this episode was hilarious and the uproar on SM even more so.

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This whole thing is fake. He must have been told by the producers to tell both he loved them.

And the women, how can they love him? They barely spent time with him.

This was my first season watching this show and it's kind of weird, unless it's fake. Then it makes sense.

Edited by Pepperminty
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I'm so over Ben and his "nice guy" schtick. Wtf was even the point of doing all the "I love yous" with JoJo. I can't muster great amounts of sympathy for anyone on this show, but I've grown real weary of Ben and think it's pretty shitty of him to (as I see it) emotionally manipulate her that way (for no reason - she didn't think he was even allowed to say it!). Cut the dramatics dude, you know you're gonna pick Lauren. Declaring your "love" to whoever strokes your ego the best (har har no pun intended) is not a good look.

And what's with him being like "Caila smiles too much," then immediately whining when she stops?

He just seems like a whiny baby.

But that commercial comparing him to Manwich?! Bachelor as sloppy Joe meat?! Lol, what on earth

Edited by wovenloaf
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And I don't think he slept with Caila.  But definitely JoJo and Lauren.  

 

I would bet good money that he did.  Clearly, Caila wanted to confront him about something, but then thought better of it. 

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I would bet good money that he did.  Clearly, Caila wanted to confront him about something, but then thought better of it. 

Yep. When she jumped out of the car she was thiiiis close to pulling a Nick with a "why did you make love to me?" but then realized it would jeopardize her chances of being the Bachelorette so she stopped herself.  

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It's probably been a few years since I've actually watched the overnight dates episode -- when did the cameras show up in the morning for breakfast in bed? I don't think I'm TOO much of a prude, but yeez louise, that's just sleazy. To show the shot of Lauren's dress on the floor! Gah. Who needs to see this?

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It's probably been a few years since I've actually watched the overnight dates episode -- when did the cameras show up in the morning for breakfast in bed? I don't think I'm TOO much of a prude, but yeez louise, that's just sleazy. To show the shot of Lauren's dress on the floor! Gah. Who needs to see this?

 

I think they started it last season with Kaitlyn. But yeah, TMI. I don't need to see these people post-coitus. Eww.

 

Ben is an idiot. Total idiot. He could've saved someone a lot of heartache by simply keeping his stupid thoughts to himself like he's supposed to do. I wouldn't be surprised if the producers were urging him to say whatever he feels though, since it was way too obvious he's leaning towards Lauren. They needed some drama and he delivered.

 

I just can't with Caila. She and Ben seemed like total strangers on their date yet she's talking about being ready to marry him and blah blah while crying dry tears. Bitch please! I really hope they don't make her the Bachelorette, because I don't think I can watch. One more pause and dramatic breath and I'll reach through my screen and strangle her.

 

The turtles were adorable! So jealous of that part of the date.

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So what's the lesson here for women? "Even the nicest, sweetest 'nice guy' is actually just a lying manipulative jerk who will say anything to get you into bed with no thought at all for your feelings, self respect (this IS all on television after all) and the future of your "relationship" together.

 

"Loving" all three so much that you have to lead them on and sleep with them--knowing they think they are "in love with you" --is so heartless that I'll never understand it.  Better to not sleep with anyone, if you can't choose one. And if you DO choose one (for the benefit of all the women and for your own reputation on television)  remember that it can always be a temporary relationship... broken engagement...whatever.... and you can still contact someone else after you've broken up (may be pretty fast) and the show is over.

 

You really don't HAVE to bang everyone as if its the last night of the world. Have some dignity! Show some respect! I disliked Brad for a long time because it seemed so obvious to me that he led both women on so he could sleep with them and then--because that's really all he wanted and he got it--dump them.  Ben had been doing so much better but apparently is an idiot. Anyone with half a brain would have thought through the endgame--and how best to play it on television--long before he reached F3.

 

I will never understand how people apparently go on this show without doing any long term planning and disciplining themselves to stick to a few principles of behavior. It's not a new program. How hard is it to learn from others' past mistakes?

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I don't believe for a minute that Ben loves Jojo. I guarantee he'll call Caila to come back.

Ha. Got us, producers! Mixing it up on us, having Ben say I love you to two women.

Is it a Portland thing that Lauren does with over pronouncing every S, or just her own oddity? "YeSSS of courSSSe". "CheerSSS!" "I'm SSSo SSScared!"

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The only answer Ben---or any man---can give to the rejected women's "WHY did you sleep with me?!" is:

"Because I could."

Edited by LennieBriscoe
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Also, why would baby sea turtles need to be rinsed off? That made no sense, as they then crawled through the sand to the water. Maybe an attempt to make the date longer than 5 mins.

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-Three ladies over two hours was always going to be a challenge for The Narrative, either The Bachelor’s own or the producers'.  Unfortunately, ABC chose to pad the running time with the usual surfeit of ads and endless strings of promos for their horrid, derivative and frankly bizarre sitcoms and dramas.  I would ask who actually ends up watching this rubbish, let alone who might enjoy it, but I fear getting an answer to that question and discovering that many such individuals might be driving alongside me at 75 mph on the highway.   Even worse, they might be driving toward me at 75 mph on the highway.

 

-No prizes for guessing the rather obvious Final Two unless you had it from the limo entrances.  Ben doesn’t seem to have worn out his welcome with the audience unlike numerous previous Bachelors but his Caila high jinks and his Torn Between Two Lovers agony cost him dear with the tongue-clucking female jury of viewers.  My probable spoiler paragraph from last week was confirmed as Ben declared his love for Lauren and her blonde hair readily visible inside the left edge of the camera frame just as it was in the same shot aired last week.  This show is, by design and necessity, formulaic but it does seem that the A/V editors phone it in rather frequently.

 

-And speaking of Caila, hindsight is easy but their interactions were painfully forced all along.  The Olivias of the world view it strictly as a competition to be won at all costs.  Caila types are followers…they believe that if a formula is adhered to and if they steer clear of the drama that a romantic relationship should be the result.  I won’t be surprised one bit if Caila has snapped out of her reverie by next week’s WTA and claims, quite credibly, that she is well over The Bachelor.  Caila’s ‘stop the car I want another go at Ben’ seemed authentically unscripted but unlike so many scorned contestants (AshLee springs to mind) she couldn’t quite get to full boil and walked away a second time having gained no additional information.

 

-Not that it matters now but Lauren was an uncharacteristically distant second to JoJo in the wardrobe department this episode, her swimsuit and salmon sweater/skirt combination being notable exceptions.  Fair play to both of them for their daringly brief cutoff shorts.  Lauren’s red RC dress bordered on the frumpy especially alongside JoJo’s floral dazzler which melded perfectly with the tropical environs.  JoJo is the Secretariat of clothes horses even if she’s slyly aware of that fact as evidenced by her social media.  We got a brief glimpse of her lace body-hugging number for the finale.  Incredible.  If she’s going out, she’s going out in a blaze of glory.

 

-Do we blame Ben or the wardrobe department for his unfortunate collection of bland t-shirts, overly wrinkled linen button-up shirts and those awful canvas sneakers that make the wearer look like an overgrown Bobby Brady?  V-neck shirts are out; to be precise, they were never in.  Get some white Adidas or K-Swiss trainers and a polo shirt.  And use the steam iron in your hotel room.

 

-Lots of internet teeth-gnashing about Ben breaking the rules by uttering the L word before the finale - to two ladies no less - but the producers have broken their own rules more than anyone during various seasons.  If they want reality this is reality.  To their credit they didn’t try to shoehorn the four of them into a standard-issue RC especially when the result was known nearly an hour before.  JoJo’s surprised reaction allowed a small peek behind the curtain when she said “Are you allowed to say that?”

 

-Dates were perfunctory and almost surplus to requirements but by this stage they usually are (although Caila sealed her fate with her oddly stilted performance early in the day).  You can never dismiss deceptive editing but JoJo’s date had a bit of a tepid start despite the helicopter ride e.g. she was reaching for his hand or leg rather than the other way round when he was with Lauren.

 

-As always, it’s a shame we must wait a fortnight for The Decision, especially when the WTA episode will likely be an hour and a half of The Incredibly Annoying Olivia Show with 20 other females barely getting a look-in except to ask them for their opinion…of Olivia.  I fear mightily that The Bachelorette will be Caila and I fear mightily that in choosing her they will be forced to recruit equally shallow, anodyne Mouseketeer type males.  The unapologetically masculine Brad Womack seems like Cro Magnon Man compared to the parade of post-adolescent sensitive boys they have been casting.

 

-I really do sympathize with Ben both for his torn loyalties and, more likely, his dread at letting one go and being angrily accused of lying, hypocrisy, manipulation, etc.  Sadly for him, the truth will be no defense!

Edited by Rainsong
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Caila may not have Ben, or any discernible personality, but she has my undying worship of her hair. How she maintains smooth, bouncy, shiny hair in that climate is truly a wonder.

 

Obviously Little Ben started making the decisions once Jojo's breast implants came out to play. I also noticed the boner in the waterfalls. I'm trying to decide whether Ben's a complete idiot, a cad, or a masterful sociopath. Whoever "wins" should run for the hills after seeing tonight's episode. Any grown man who voices every emotion he gets without considering the ramifications should not be dating, or even out in society, for that matter. 

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JoJo never looked more beautiful or seemed more real and genuine than she did tonight. I related so much when she was slightly incredulous that Ben loved her too. I could see myself feeling the same way. Her fashion on this show was incredible. She looked sexy, laid back, and glamorous all in one. She was all around enjoyable tonight. When Ben told her she looked so, "cute" was when I bought that he was realizing he loved her too. He used the same word with Lauren early on. I think it's his go to word when he's really starting to fall for someone.

 

He's known he loved Lauren for awhile and it was so incredibly obvious for so long and tonight made it even more so.

 

Caila broke my heart. She is obviously a very guarded person and had reservations for so long and when she finally let her walls down she was crushed. It absolutely felt real to me. You could tell when she went to see him spontaneously that she really cared for him and was so giddy. That was brutal to see that outcome. 

 

I really wish he would pick JoJo over Lauren. Honestly I didn't think anybody stood a chance over her until now. He's always had a deep affection for JoJo but the fact that she jumped from that to "he loved her" says a lot about his attraction to her. Dare I say she "rocked his world" in that fantasy suite? I think so. I think that adds a lot to why he's so torn. Not saying that he has only a physical attraction. They already had the friendship.

 

In my opinion JoJo blew Lauren out of the water tonight. No wonder he's torn. Poor Lauren where did she get that frumpy dress she wore to the rose ceremony? It was not flattering at all. And those barely there shorts on her date? Bad choices.

 

So I hope he picks JoJo but I don't think he will. I prefer Caila as the next B'ette but after tonight I'll be ok if JoJo gets it. Either way I have cautious hopes it will be a good season.

Edited by yorklee2
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I think out of all the women, Ben was the most physically attracted to Caila (with JoJo a close second) and had Caila hang around long enough to sleep with her.  
And Ben was stupid to tell JoJo he loved her.  Just gives her douche brothers more ammo to say "See! I told you so!"

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I'm trying to decide whether Ben's a complete idiot, a cad, or a masterful sociopath.

Luckily, I'm not choosing. I think he can be all three (or at least in that order).  But he's outdone Bob Guiney in showing what a jerk an apparently "perfect" guy can become in the blink of an eye. I agree, F2 should be relieved and F1 should run for the hills.

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It's probably been a few years since I've actually watched the overnight dates episode -- when did the cameras show up in the morning for breakfast in bed? I don't think I'm TOO much of a prude, but yeez louise, that's just sleazy. To show the shot of Lauren's dress on the floor! Gah. Who needs to see this?

I'm with you here; the whole cameras at breakfast makes things really sleazy. I liked things better in the old days, where the camera faded out at night and we were left to imagine what happened. In my mind, the night was followed with a Silkwood shower and perhaps some cleansing prayer before going to the next Fantasy Suite. Now, the only thing I imagined was Ben stopping and washing his manwich in the lobby restroom sink before taking his sloppy seconds and thirds on to the next lady. Gross.

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It makes me sad that I'd never be allowed on this show, because I don't own a pair of booty shorts. Seriously, Caila and Lauren looked like they were wearing denim underwear.

I must be getting old, because when I saw those shorts, my firs thought was "Where do they keep their money and I.D.?"

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May I say I hate Lauren's hair?

It's awful!

Poor Caila. Brutal indeed.

Yes you may and I second that. She's had moments when it looked freshly colored and styled but then it always goes back to that unfortunate mess. She seemed more off this episode than others. Bad fashion choices also.

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Best episode ever! I still love Ben but I really love that the editors seemed to have said "f*** this s***, we're showing everything." I might be wrong but I swear he was mildly drunk during the fake dinner part of all the dates, glassy eyed and just staring at the women as they ran on and on about how wonderful he is and their lives will be and they never thought they could find someone like him, blah blah blah. Priceless. And of course his "I love yous" could have been edited out (ten bucks says he had told that to Lauren about four weeks earlier anyway but we didn't get to see it). Chris H.'s subtle eyerolling as both Jojo and Lauren confided that Ben had told them those three little words--oh no he didn't!

The pointless final rose ceremony was hilarious, the subtext ricocheting around the champagne toasting. More glassy eyes for Ben after he said he let go the one girl he didn't have feelings for! Lauren's face as it dawned on her that maybe she wasn't the only special snowflake left standing, and that little narrowing of Jojo's eyes before she toasted the fantasy suite. Fabulous. And speaking of fabulous, Jojo's rose ceremony dress--awesome. Mr MML was a little more taken by her copperish bikini.

And seriously, these three women especially, as Jojo said on an earlier episode, are never competing for a guy in real life, they are fighting guys off. Plenty of fish in their seas no matter what, and Ben, you might have a twelve step program in your future. Caila, remember this special moment when you are inviting guys into your fantasy suite and then sending one home when you are the Bachelorette....

Edited by MakeMeLaugh
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The word love...it's such an arbitrary word without a clear definition. If it is extreme fondness, then I fully understand feeling that way for multiple people. We are all human and all capable of loving multiple people/things simultaneously.

 

That said, I do think it is a jerk move to tell someone you love them to give them the impression that you have chosen them alone, while you are actually telling someone else the same thing. And maybe "jerk" is too polite a term for it. It's cruel, and if this isn't in any way scripted then Ben is an asshole for manipulating the women to believe they have "won" his partnership.

 

Only about 1 out of every 100 of those young sea turtles will live to adulthood. It's rough out there for those little guys.

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Ben and Lauren go to the fantasy suite, and talk about how they're going to have "private time"  with no cameras, and a chance to speak privately.  And then we SEE them continue to talk, and kiss, and say the "I love yous" .    And then - cut to Lauren's dress on the floor, Ben's pants on the floor, Lauren in bed in PJ's in the morning.  

Really? 

So basically, the way the story is being told is that the cameras are rolling UNTIL they start to have sex, and then the cameras start up again the minute they wake up. 

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In my mind, the night was followed with a Silkwood shower and perhaps some cleansing prayer before going to the next Fantasy Suite. Now, the only thing I imagined was Ben stopping and washing his manwich in the lobby restroom sink before taking his sloppy seconds and thirds on to the next lady. Gross.

A Silkwood shower!   Too funny.   

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Best episode ever! I still love Ben but I really love that the editors seemed to have said "f*** this s***, we're showing everything." I might be wrong but I swear he was mildly drunk during the fake dinner part of all the dates, glassy eyed and just staring at the women as they ran on and on about how wonderful he is and their lives will be and they never thought they could find someone like him, blah blah blah. Priceless. And of course his "I love yous" could have been edited out (ten bucks says he had told that to Lauren about four weeks earlier anyway but we didn't get to see it). Chris H.'s subtle eyerolling as both Jojo and Lauren confided that Ben had told them those three little words--oh no he didn't!

The pointless final rose ceremony was hilarious, the subtext ricocheting around the champagne toasting. More glassy eyes for Ben after he said he let go the one girl he didn't have feelings for! Lauren's face as it dawned on her that maybe she wasn't the only special snowflake left standing, and that little narrowing of Jojo's eyes before she toasted the fantasy suite. Fabulous. And speaking of fabulous, Jojo's rose ceremony dress--awesome. Mr MML was a little more taken by her copperish bikini.

And seriously, these three women especially, as Jojo said on an earlier episode, are never competing for a guy in real life, they are fighting guys off. Plenty of fish in their seas no matter what, and Ben, you might have a twelve step program in your future. Caila, remember this special moment when you are inviting guys into your fantasy suite and then sending one home when you are the Bachelorette....

Agree. Yes Ben did a shitty thing sleeping with Caila when he knew he wasn't going to pick her but come on how many times has this happened on this show. The fantasy suites are a essential part of it. The women knew it going in. 

 

One could always argue in Ben's defense that we don't know 100% what happened in Caila's fantasy suite. She could have declined and that may have contributed to her being ousted. Which would really make Ben a douche bag but I don't think that's what happened. I think she did and that's why she came back to confront him.

 

In real life a shitty move regardless. Realistically on this show par for the course.

Edited by yorklee2
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