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Janelle Brown: Smarter Than Your Average Brown (Maybe)

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The Jelly Belly School of Nutrition may want to revoke her certification, if she's already earned it, for this claim:

"And the great thing is that it's a nutritional supplement not a diet so it can fit any lifestyle."

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And yet... Janelle's just sittin' here, on the couch. Great advertising, Janelle... 

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Is it true that the ingredients in Janelle's latest rockstar aren't even on the label?

No way would I go near that crap, regardless.  I've heard it makes one get diarrhea and heaven knows what else it does.

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And yet Jenny is still obese. If she loses 100 pounds in 6 months then I might think Plexus works (because there is probably a tapeworm in there). These MLM things make me mad. They are all lies.

Does Jenny ever leave a couch??? 

 

Edited by iwantcookies
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1 hour ago, ginger90 said:

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Jet lag? For a two hour time difference? Is that a thing? Also that is one cute toddler. 

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4 minutes ago, NoWhammies said:

Jet lag? For a two hour time difference? Is that a thing? Also that is one cute toddler. 

With her everything is a thing aka she is lazy 

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I can only hope that her next post says, "I just flew in from Flagstaff and boy are my arms tired. But I took Plexus and now they feel greeeeeeaaaaat! Take my sister wife, please. I'm here all week folks, don't forget to tip your waitresses!"

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5 hours ago, NoWhammies said:

Jet lag? For a two hour time difference? Is that a thing? Also that is one cute toddler. 

JANELLE IS TOTALLY FULL OF SHIT. 

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On 3/20/2021 at 5:10 PM, nosedive said:

Wow! You're very disciplined!  Will you be my coach?  Slim and Dandy with Sandy has a nice ring.🙂

 

   

Meh. I think I’d be too matter of fact. The fact that if I’m not disciplined, I’ll be the size of a house isn’t exactly encouraging, but it’s a reality for some of us.  What Janelle would hear from me: 

“Janelle. I get it. I also have anxiety, depression and a lousy metabolism. It sucks. Your reality is going to be difficult. You will need to work harder and eat less, all while observing those who get to work less and eat more. It’s not fair, but if you want to be even remotely credible, you gotta accept it and stick with it. Otherwise, stop the Strive charade. You can’t even coach yourself.” 

Maybe Whitney needs to hear this too. Yeah, people don’t like hearing the truth especially when you tell them “it is hard”. 

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Maddie and Janelle just did a live about Plexus on the Strive Facebook page. 
 

The fact someone would not consult their doctor, but ask Janelle instead, is troubling enough. The fact Janelle gave this response is criminal.

(The first picture is a screenshot)

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Oh my god Janelle is setting herself up for trouble. And that poster is not bright if they have to ask and I'm sure she will clear it with her nephrologist. 

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3 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

Maddie and Janelle just did a live about Plexus on the Strive Facebook page. 
 

The fact someone would not consult their doctor, but ask Janelle instead, is troubling enough. The fact Janelle gave this response is criminal.

(The first picture is a screenshot)

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Greedy, grasping pigs with no conscience.  It's one thing to hang poorly made, unattractive clothing on their followers as Meri and Christine do, but quite another to prescribe a treatment to someone foolish enough to seek medical advice from Janelle or Maddie.

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If someone is dumb enough to ask medical advice from Jenelle... They are hopeless. 
 

I am just speechless. 

Edited by iwantcookies
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4 hours ago, ginger90 said:

Maddie and Janelle just did a live about Plexus on the Strive Facebook page. 
 

The fact someone would not consult their doctor, but ask Janelle instead, is troubling enough. The fact Janelle gave this response is criminal.

(The first picture is a screenshot)

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I used to say I hated Janelle least out of the adults, but I guess this response disqualifies her too.  I mean it’s almost obligatory with health things to say consult your doctor, but even most people that were just worried about sales and wouldn’t write that would just ignore the question completely.  I’m not even going to get into the person doesn’t even have healthy kidneys to start with.  These people are morons.

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Janelle seems to be on Maddie's downline.  I doubt that either of them will actually make money from this MLM, and I can only see ways that Plexus would diminish the profitability of Strive with Janelle and undermine its purpose.  Maybe Savannah will run it, since she's not learning bass guitar or working out side-by-side with Janelle and Maddie.  

For as preposterous as it is, Janelle is actually more dignified in presenting herself as a health coach and charging her fans $45 for accountability groups.  Those are straight-out money-grabs that didn't risk (or actually improve) anyone's health.

I'm personally annoyed that I complimented her too early for not grifting in one of her posts.  I then learned that Plexus advises their sellers to post constantly and balance non-Plexus and Plexus posts so that their networks don't think that they're shilling 24/7 *when, in fact, they are).

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It is frightening to me that she is telling a person in stage three kidney failure that this is safe to use! No mention to check with her dr first. One of these days her recommendations are going to kill someone.

7 hours ago, iwantcookies said:

If someone is dumb enough to ask medical advice from Jenelle... They are hopeless. 
 

I am just speechless. 

And maybe they will end up dead. If a "supplement" is banned in at least 2 countries, no way am I going within a country mile of it, let alone drinking it!! I am diabetic and really need to take care of my kidneys, would never take any risks on this snake oil...

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Just now, Gramto6 said:

It is frightening to me that she is telling a person in stage three kidney failure that this is safe to use!

I am willing to bet that the TLC lawyers are already scrambling to figure out how to divorce themselves from any liability.

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On 3/26/2021 at 12:31 PM, ginger90 said:

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I don’t believe her. We’ve heard this all before. If Janelle gets back to us in 2 months with some weight loss, I will applaud her efforts. 

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On 3/26/2021 at 4:00 PM, ginger90 said:

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An actual brick-and-mortar restaurant plated up this mess?

Janelle's food pictures are always repulsive, but even this picture of what was served to her at a restaurant is anything but appetizing.  There's less than zero that's aesthetically appealing in that meal.  It makes McDonald's look tasty by comparison.  

Ugh. 🤢

 

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21 hours ago, ginger90 said:

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Can anyone tell me what crawfish tastes like?  Ever since I heard crawfish referred to as mud bugs I can't bring myself to try them.  Do they taste like shrimp?

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9 minutes ago, smarty said:

Can anyone tell me what crawfish tastes like?  Ever since I heard crawfish referred to as mud bugs I can't bring myself to try them.  Do they taste like shrimp?

They are almost a cross between shrimp and crab, slightly sweet.  

"mud bugs", LOL, my dear old granny referred to all shellfish as "the scavengers of the sea" and wouldn't eat or serve them to family or guests.  Sorry Gran, I eventually tried them and developed a taste for all of them, with the exception of escargot.

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7 minutes ago, Sandy W said:

They are almost a cross between shrimp and crab, slightly sweet.  

Perfect description. I love them.

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27 minutes ago, Sandy W said:

They are almost a cross between shrimp and crab, slightly sweet.  

"mud bugs", LOL, my dear old granny referred to all shellfish as "the scavengers of the sea" and wouldn't eat or serve them to family or guests.  Sorry Gran, I eventually tried them and developed a taste for all of them, with the exception of escargot.

I can't eat shellfish at all, and I never developed a taste for it.  Fish with fins and scales is to my liking, exactly the opposite of Mr. Xword, as he eats lobster, shrimp, clams, crab, all the crustaceans.  He fished in Alaska as a teen and can't stomach salmon these days, my favorite.

Janelle can't make photos of anything look appetizing.  

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Popping in to say I’ve seen more emotion from Janelle in these COVID episodes than I’ve seen in her from her in the last decade of episodes.

I was shocked to see her why last week thinking about missing Kody 😳

But I also think she has some strange attitudes towards the virus, might be a difference in political opinions, but she definitely seems the most deeply affected by the pandemic (so far). 

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On 3/28/2021 at 1:14 PM, Persnickety1 said:

An actual brick-and-mortar restaurant plated up this mess?

Janelle's food pictures are always repulsive, but even this picture of what was served to her at a restaurant is anything but appetizing.  There's less than zero that's aesthetically appealing in that meal.  It makes McDonald's look tasty by comparison.  

Ugh. 🤢

 

I'm confused as to which items are supposed to be the hush puppies like grandma used to make?  Did she eat them all before she took the picture?

And in her previous Strive post, she tells us that - prior to the magic that is Plexus - she used to visit Maddie but the jet-lag made her unavailable to help out much with the grandbabies.  That had to have been nice for Maddie to have her mom come for an extended visit only to lay on her couch eating Doritos and watching Netflix.

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29 minutes ago, laurakaye said:

I'm confused as to which items are supposed to be the hush puppies like grandma used to make?  Did she eat them all before she took the picture?

If grandma made free-form hush puppies (fried cornbread) instead of forming the batter/dough into balls or twinkie shapes, that could be one in the background under "Follow", unless it is someone else's crawfish & Janelle ate all the hush puppies. More brownish beige food for the Browns.  

Edited by deirdra
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Gonna be even better when she pours those two as yet unopened packets of salad dressing all over it.

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What kind of phone does she have that magically turns possibly edible food into some sort of nightmare dish?

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1 hour ago, ginger90 said:

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That packaged dressing is usually a calorie nightmare.  I would have told them that I would use my own low-cal dressing, and hold the croutons.  Janelle knows nothing about healthy eating.

And, what's in that drink?  Sugar galore, no doubt.  She's hopeless.

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I had to look.  Salad and Go is a local chain based in Phoenix and expanding to Dallas. The link to its nutrition page is below.

A Bruschetta Caprese salad has 310 calories and 15g fat.  The chicken adds another 130 calories.  So, her salad without dressing is 410 calories.  

If the green salad dressing is jalapeno ranch, that packet contains 200 calories.  If it's basil pesto dressing, the packet is 400 calories.  If the orange dressing is BBQ ranch, that packet contains 150 calories.  If it's Thai peanut, the packet is 325 calories.  Her salad with dressing ranges from 560 to 810 calories.  If she uses both packets, the calorie count for the salad with dressing soars between 760 and 1135.

The drink may be cucumber mint lemonade.  If so, she's consuming another 120 calories (for 16 ounces) and 29g sugar.  Just last week, she posted that she kicked her sugar addiction with Plexus.

The salad cost $5.74, and the drink cost $1 - so, she is right that those are good prices.

https://saladandgo.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/03/SAG-full-nutritional-3.17.21-Spring-v3.pdf

Edited by Grifter Lives
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On 3/26/2021 at 7:00 PM, ginger90 said:

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I must admit Emerald Isle is great!   I never think of running into Janelle or another Brown until I see them out and about in NC.  

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We have a salad chain here - Sweetgreen. 

A little pricier but their salads are much better than *this*.

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7 hours ago, ginger90 said:

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Sure Jen you NEED veggies 🙄. And that drink is probably not diet.
 

We all know you need/crave junk food! 

 

 

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Erm just how can she tell the difference between her all day ennui and her afternoon lag?

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28 minutes ago, Chicklet said:

Erm just how can she tell the difference between her all day ennui and her afternoon lag?

The clock.

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If it gives her "all day energy", why is there an afternoon lag?  Let's see a log of her blood sugar that proves Plexus actually "balances" her BG.

Edited by deirdra
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12 minutes ago, deirdra said:

If it gives her "all day energy", why is there an afternoon lag?  Let's see a log of her blood sugar that proves Plexus actually "balances" her BG.

Oh as a diabetic, I'd love to see that!

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Oh, Janelle.  Please just stop, especially now that you're a Plexus spokesperson.  Hopefully not one person takes you up on this stupid offer.

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A comment on the Strive post:

 

And then the pressure will be on to buy Plexus products, not impressed Janelle

ETA: Janelle just responded to this:

Nope.  These accountability groups were running before I discovered Plexus and are run independently from the product.  
 

 

Someone asked what the deadline for signing up is, Janelle replied:

 

The first few days are just working through some prep so we will take enrollments through 4/12.  If you need other arrangements just message me 🙂

Edited by ginger90
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Geez, Janelle - if the group is set to start on April 8, why not get the "prep" ready BEFORE APRIL 8?

I know I'm preaching to the choir but she could make a slug look like the Road Runner. 

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40 minutes ago, laurakaye said:

Geez, Janelle - if the group is set to start on April 8, why not get the "prep" ready BEFORE APRIL 8?

This allows her plenty of time to eat all her Easter candy?

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I actually did some research online last night about eating clean and low calorie......omg. It involves a lot more than I thought.  I don’t think Janelle is even close.

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The same dehydrated peas and carrots in their copy for the 3rd time.  They should get Audge to design the artwork for Strive, she may suggest at least spritzing them with a little water.

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