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Janelle Brown: Smarter Than Your Average Brown (Maybe)


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I like Jannelle the best. And while I really want to think of her as being smart, the fact that she hangs around with these lazy grifters, prevents me from admiring her. I look at Kody and think, man, Jannelle, you could have done sooooo much better !

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I like Janelle the best also.  She's clearly the brains of the family (although that's not saying much).  I hope she continues with her weight loss/exercise regimen.  Christine's my second favorite, followed by Robin (there's quite a gap in my "likeness scale" between Christine and Robin), and then -- after a huge gap -- Meri bringing up the rear (heh!).   

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I have no idea what she is doing in this family. She constantly looks miserable, she never gets her way (wanting to open a gym but the family went with Robyn's jewelry <tacky> business and it seemed like when she was working full-time the majority of her money went to the rest of the lazy people.

I know she makes lusty remarks about Kody all the time, but is it really worth the misery?

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4leafclover, I know but she drooled and said she loves Kody's tight pants and she likes him with a facial hair. She gets a teenaged girl smile on her face when she talks about him. I'm not seeing the appeal. 

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Blechhh!  I agree with you!  But all 4 of those women act like silly school girls talking about their first crush when they talk about Kody--Christine frequently talks about his good looks (?) and sometimes they act as if they are so lucky to be married to such a hunk!  I'm really disappointed in Janelle--she seems too smart for this whole situation.

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Very happy that Janelle and Kody are amorous now!!!  I was rooting for Janelle and Rosemary (MFW) to run away with their kids and set up house a la Kate & Allie since neither seemed too happy.  I guess Rosemary is now the only wife who looks like she's more in a friendship now.  

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I can see what the ladies saw in Kody, because based on his early photos, he was kinda "cute". Now?  Not so much.  So happy for Janelle's new chapter with Kody.  Compared to the other wives, she seems the most sensible and very low maintenance.     

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(edited)
Very happy that Janelle and Kody are amorous now

 

I think they played it up after all the talk online about how he seems to not be attracted to her. I also think people give Janelle too much credit, she is the one who pursued Kodouche and talks about how "amazing" their life is.

Edited by Armchair Critic
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I like Janelle, but she's part of the problem. She avoided issues for years by working long hours and avoiding the family. She's really the most difficult to figure out. She's the only wife not raised in polygamy, and since she was raised LDS, she would have been taught the evils of polygamy. She also had the benefit of being sister-in-law to Meri, and should have known Meri was difficult. This leads me to believe that Janelle really did have the hots for Kody.

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Watching the show and reading this book.. this is my take on Janelle/Kody.  I think Meri/Kody was a very normal teenage fling that turned sour as a marriage.  Kody was starved for rational discussion and turned to Janelle.  Kody/Janelle formed a legit relationship built on trust and respect.  That threatened Meri, they appeased her by hiding their relationship.  I think it's always been very romantic and perhaps even the most passionate.  Kody did work very hard to get Janelle to return to the family after she briefly lived separately.

 

Christine feels like a place filler after all that drama and Robyn is the substitute womb.  I don't see any honest love in those marriages.

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Watching the show and reading this book.. this is my take on Janelle/Kody.  I think Meri/Kody was a very normal teenage fling that turned sour as a marriage.  Kody was starved for rational discussion and turned to Janelle.  Kody/Janelle formed a legit relationship built on trust and respect.  That threatened Meri, they appeased her by hiding their relationship.  I think it's always been very romantic and perhaps even the most passionate.  Kody did work very hard to get Janelle to return to the family after she briefly lived separately.

 

Christine feels like a place filler after all that drama and Robyn is the substitute womb.  I don't see any honest love in those marriages.

I tend to agree.  Of all the wives, Janelle seems to be the one Kody actually likes.  I don't know if they were ever in the kind of "schmoopy" love that folks think of as romantic, but I think they have a deep affection for one another and a friendship that translates well as the relationship/marriage matures.  He isn't as condescending toward her as the other wives are and he listens when she speaks.  He looked stricken when Janelle teared up over being left out of the roles in MSWC.  I think he pats Meri on the head so she'll shut up, condescends to Christine, and treats Robyn like a princess.  I think Janelle is the only one he sees as an equal and true partner.

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She [Janelle] also had the benefit of being sister-in-law to Meri, and should have known Meri was difficult. This leads me to believe that Janelle really did have the hots for Kody.

 

I don’t think there is any doubt that Janelle had and still has the hots for Kody.  I wouldn’t be surprised if her feelings for him had something to do with the demise of her first marriage.  It could also be one of the reasons why Mary was so nasty to her. 

 

I think Janelle is the only one he sees as an equal and true partner.

 

This may sound crazy, but I believe if Kody had to choose a wife to live in a monogamous relationship, it would be Janelle.  He seems to actually like and respect her and she appears to be madly in love with him. 

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(edited)

I don't know, I felt early on in the show that he and Meri were truly in love with each other.  I do agree that Janelle and Kody seem to be good friends, and if she is getting a little more lovin' these days, well, more power to her.  I think their relationship is more mature than everyone else's, they seem to have a very comfortable relationship.  And she doesn't seem as emotional and prone to knee-jerk reactions (CFO issue excepted).  

 

Janelle is the one who approached Kody to join the family (in the book) which is just so weird to me.  How strange would it be to be single and not have married men be off limits, but as available, or even more desired than a regular single guy? It's just such a weird mindset, and since she's the only one who grew up in a monogoamous family I don't tend to give her any slack because she should know better.  Being a kid and being indoctrinated into this way of life is understandable, to me.  But being a grown ass woman and thinking, he's cute!  He's married!  I should become a polygamist!  - to me, that is just ridiculous. 

 

Janelle is definitely her own person, which I admire, but she is not a genius. She's just a genius in comparison to these other idiots.  In a kingdom of blind men, the one-eyed man is king.  Or in this case, half brained woman.

Edited by DeusExMaraschino
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I don’t think there is any doubt that Janelle had and still has the hots for Kody.  I wouldn’t be surprised if her feelings for him had something to do with the demise of her first marriage.  It could also be one of the reasons why Mary was so nasty to her.

 

 

Oh brilliant!  I think we may have gotten to the real reason Meri resented Janelle.  If the above quote is true - wow.  Supposedly, Janelle approached Kody about being his wife.  Not good.  So Janelle is married, falls for her brother-in-law, propositions Kody, divorces first husband.  Yikes.  From everything they have said about their religion, it is not typical for a woman to approach and ask to be a married man's second wife. 

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Janelle's wide set eyes make her look like an albino frog.

She's unappealing, and has zero personality.

LOL! I totally agree with you! I have always thought she looks like a toad/ frog and she reminds me of Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum on Alice In Wonderland because she is shaped exactly like them. Especially when she wears those tight ass shirts that are five sizes too small and you can see all her spare tires. She always sounds like she's out of breath when she talks too. Her makeup looks horrible and messy. I can't stand her!
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Her makeup looks horrible and messy. 

I do think she is the prettiest out of the sister wives (I guess the one eye person being king among the blind applies to this too), but I totally agree with you regarding the thick under eye liner that doesn't start  and one corner of the eye and end at the other. It is just a thick line placed in the middle of the eye. Why? Does she not have a mirror? Does she apply it correctly and cries it off? Does she not wear her contacts when she does her make-up? I work with a woman who wears her eye make-up in a similar way and I think to myself that she must apply it in the dark without a mirror.

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Meri is jealous of Janelle because Janelle gave Kody the first child and sons.

 

Bingo! According to their book, Meri was a bitch to Janelle from the get-go; it was a case of agreeing with polygamy in theory, but in reality she wanted her home and husband to be HERS (which is a completely NORMAL feeling!!) and she bullied Janelle so much that Janelle basically lived in her bedroom. Karma's a bitch, though, and as you say, Janelle produced the first heir. Ruh-roh.

 

BTW, my understanding is that Janelle was already divorced from Meri's brother when she chose Kody. And that is supposed to be one of the big "perks" of plyg life: no man is off limits. It puts me in a combative mood  just trying to imagine living with the knowledge that any woman out there could weasel her way into my home and into my husband's bed, with impunity.

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I do think she is the prettiest out of the sister wives (I guess the one eye person being king among the blind applies to this too), but I totally agree with you regarding the thick under eye liner that doesn't start  and one corner of the eye and end at the other. It is just a thick line placed in the middle of the eye. Why? Does she not have a mirror? Does she apply it correctly and cries it off? Does she not wear her contacts when she does her make-up? I work with a woman who wears her eye make-up in a similar way and I think to myself that she must apply it in the dark without a mirror.

 

I read this and then just sat here thinking, "Who do I think is the prettiest? Um...prettiest? Pretty?" It's a stretch!

 

If we could somehow magically make all of them 21 years old and reasonably slender (for comparison), I'd still knock Meri out of the contest first (and, okay I'm going to get snarky here: if you have enough money for that useless house, you have enough money to get that brown tooth fixed. There. I said it.) Robyn is long-limbed and I think her hair is lovely; she has pretty eyes, but that Dudley Do-Right chin in profile is not happening, so she's out, too. Between Janelle and Christine (in my silly made-up scenario of slender and 21) I think Christine would be prettier; I think Janelle's wide-set eyes are fine when her makeup is done well; but I have a little trouble with the "gummy" smile.

 

I honestly think there has been a HUGE improvement in Janelle's hair and makeup, though. If you look at her in, oh, season 3, she consistently has super heavy under-eye black liner (WAY too harsh for someone with her delicate coloring), she has no eyebrows (which has a much bigger impact than a lot of women realize), and her hair is all white--no dimension to the color at all.  Here recently her hair has soft layers with caramel undertones (caramel--heheh...see what I did there?), a softer eye, nicely defined brows, and a gold highlighter across the cheekbones. I think there's been a big change.

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I think Christine would be prettier

 

 

I was recently watching one of the "The Browns sit down and answer questions that you don't really care about" eps from last season and was shocked by how pretty Christine was.  With professional hair and makeup she actually was a stunner.

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Robyn is long-limbed and I think her hair is lovely; she has pretty eyes, but that Dudley Do-Right chin in profile is not happening, so she's out, too.

Since becoming a "Brown" her head has become a square.

 

she has no eyebrows (which has a much bigger impact than a lot of women realize),

As a person who has blonde eyebrows and eyelashes, I can attest that you are completely right about this. When people see me w/o make-up (my eyelashes and eyebrows disappear) I can tell they are taken aback at the drastic change. Mascara and eyebrow shadow are my friends.

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I think the kids all look so much like their moms, so that helps me imagine them a bit better at 21. And Christine's daughters are absolutely beautiful. I would rank them Christine, Jenelle, Robyn, Meri. Oh my gosh, I feel incredibly shallow now. I better go do something that stimulates my brain for several hours. 

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It's so weird to me that everyone thinks Janelle is the prettiest. From the beginning I always thought she was the least attractive and Meri the better looking one if you get past her chin cleft. Of course this was in the beginning and Meri has gotten way more haggard over the years and looks awful now with her bad complexion and weight gain. Now I think Christine probably is the prettiest, but I still don't get the whole Janelle-is-gorgeous thing (and I mean just her face - not factoring in her weight at all). I also don't think her new hair is any better than her old hair. The chunky caramel highlights are so dated and not very age appropriate. She needs a nice single color with some dimension that doesn't wash her out like the platinum blonde (not dark, but maybe a darker blonde).*

 

And ditto on the pale eyebrows/lashes thing. I'm a natural redhead and I look like a totally different person without makeup because my lashes and eyebrows are so pale.

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I want Janelle to have a long blowout. I do think she's pretty, and Maddie is the lucky one to look more like mom than Kody. All the other kids look Soooo much alike to me that it must be all Kody genes.

She's probably a stress eater, and I empathize with that. I just wish she'd realize that she does not need to be tied to them all. I still wish Janelle and Christine would team up and leave.

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Since becoming a "Brown" her head has become a square.

As a person who has blonde eyebrows and eyelashes, I can attest that you are completely right about this. When people see me w/o make-up (my eyelashes and eyebrows disappear) I can tell they are taken aback at the drastic change. Mascara and eyebrow shadow are my friends.

I was born with dark hair, eyebrows, and lashes, so never realized what a great difference defined brows make to the overall look of the face. Then I got old and silver-haired, and my thick, dark brows and lashes got super-sparse. Many of my friends go to great lengths to color their hair and find the right concealer and lipstick, but they continue to look washed-out because their eyebrows are skimpy and straggly. Whether it's the brows or the eyes, though, very few pale blondes, redheads (or silver ladies) can carry off deep black mascara, liner, etc. I really do think someone got to Janelle and gave her some makeup tips.

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 ...but I still don't get the whole Janelle-is-gorgeous thing (and I mean just her face - not factoring in her weight at all).

I, for one, would NEVER call Janelle "gorgeous," nor would I call any of the Krew "gorgeous." (I don't see many people that I WOULD call "gorgeous, including yours truly!) But I do think her look has improved since the show began. As for her hairstyle not being age appropriate, I'm not really sure how that term applies; if she was wearing pigtails, I'd agree, but then I am pretty resistant to age-related 'rules.' If pressed to use the term, I'd use it to refer to the baby-doll tops they were all wearing over too-small t-shirts. :)

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(edited)

I, for one, would NEVER call Janelle "gorgeous," nor would I call any of the Krew "gorgeous." (I don't see many people that I WOULD call "gorgeous, including yours truly!) But I do think her look has improved since the show began. As for her hairstyle not being age appropriate, I'm not really sure how that term applies; if she was wearing pigtails, I'd agree, but then I am pretty resistant to age-related 'rules.' If pressed to use the term, I'd use it to refer to the baby-doll tops they were all wearing over too-small t-shirts. :)

I meant the chunky highlights. They just make me think of high schoolers/college age kids, but that may also be because that was the age I was back when they were more popular. We commonly referred to it as "skunk hair" (chunky highlights in a much darker color than the rest of your hair).

 

But I agree that her look in general has greatly improved. She is definitely the best dresser out of this group (not that that says much). She doesn't do the tank tops over long sleeves and her tops generally fit her, unlike the other wives and their too-tight tops.

Edited by Ladystardust
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But I agree that her look in general has greatly improved. She is definitely the best dresser out of this group (not that that says much). She doesn't do the tank tops over long sleeves and her tops generally fit her, unlike the other wives and their too-tight tops.

All of the wives have not fashion sense, that is why think it is hilarious that they started a business in the fashion field. Their jewelry look like Monopoly playing pieces. 

I think Janelle is the "best dresser" because she is larger and dresses in plain styles, I bet when (if) she gets thin her fashion sense will get suckier. After all she thinks Kody is gorgeous, she likes his tight (feminine) jeans and his "long" (mushroom shaped) hair. All of this tells me deep down she has shitty taste.

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I would love to spend a day with janelle and give her a makeover. She is by no means "gorgeous" but she is not unattractive. Hair needs to be much darker (more honey colored with lighter highlights if she likes the blond). Makeup would be easy, less harsh eyeliner/mascara and defined brows.

I sympathize with her as far as her weight struggles are concerned. Honestly she needs to spend more time meal planning and shopping for healthy foods rather than time with that fame-whore trainer. He is not selling his expertise with janelle's lack of weight loss.

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Hair needs to be much darker (more honey colored with lighter highlights if she likes the blond).

 

 

Oh I agree. With her pretty eye color, they would just pop with honey highlights.

 

Honestly she needs to spend more time meal planning and shopping for healthy foods rather than time with that fame-whore trainer. He is not selling his expertise with janelle's lack of weight loss.

 

 

I agree again. I haven't seen the basics of her weight loss plan. Her famewhore trainer seems to think he's some kind of a life coach or therapist. He keeps having her do all these gimmicky things to get in touch with her insides when she should be working on the outside first. I know weight loss begins on the inside, blah, blah, but it makes for some very boring scenes.

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Giving the pitch about fashion was the funniest thing I've seen in awhile.  In fact, I can't believe they didn't show u in their jeans.  And they are now experts in the fashion industry?  Wow, how far have we fallen?

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 I haven't seen the basics of her weight loss plan. Her famewhore trainer seems to think he's some kind of a life coach or therapist. He keeps having her do all these gimmicky things to get in touch with her insides when she should be working on the outside first. I know weight loss begins on the inside, blah, blah, but it makes for some very boring scenes.

 

They did have one show where they had Janelle meet with "Bombshell" for food tips.  However, it's clear (to me anyway) that she isn't watching her calorie intake.  Janelle needs to get My Fitness Pal or a similar food tracker and keep track.  Even if she has thyroid or other issues that make weight loss more difficult (which I doubt, quite frankly), she should still be able to lose weight.  The shots of Janelle freaking out after climbing a whole 4 feet while harnessed in a climbing gym which also probably had a deeply foam-padded floor made it apparent that while she's lost enough weight to make a difference in her face/neck area, she still has a loooong way to go.  Incidentally, just last week while climbing I saw someone who was lead climbing fall from 20 feet up onto the floor (again, foam padded) - he was a little shaken up but just fine.  Sean should have let Janelle "fall" so she could see the rope would hold her and she could stop freaking out already, but that wouldn't be *dramatic* enough.  If she freaks out going up 4-5 feet, I guess she's not the one who changes light bulbs at her McMansion.

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They did have one show where they had Janelle meet with "Bombshell" for food tips.  However, it's clear (to me anyway) that she isn't watching her calorie intake.  Janelle needs to get My Fitness Pal or a similar food tracker and keep track. 

 

I couldn't agree more. Taking the time to track (I love FitDay.com) forces you to confront the reality of your intake in black and white. Seeing those calories add up and looking at what sort of nutrient balance you're REALLY getting, is a wake-up call. It may be that overcoming the long term hurdle of starting to exercise was so big for Janelle that she was expecting a magical fix to take place. But the food and the exercise both have to be brought into line if she wants to get down to a normal BMI. And trust me, I'm speaking from loooooong experience!

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 The pace is slower if you don't do "fad" diets or have a medical problem but I've seen people loose a huge amount (healthily) in much less time then Janelle has supposedly been at it by combining exercise and calorie control, even if they had diabetes. I'm unconvinced she made drastic food changes for ages after she started trying to loose publicly for storyline reasons.  

 

The flaw I see is that she's allowed her health to be a plot point.

 

True, but then Christine and Robyn allowed their births to be public. Anything that's vaguely interesting (and a lot that isn't) is up to be turned into a "storyline". I presume that if she really couldn't cope with it as a story for public entertainment she could nix it, instead of having her personal trainer front and centre a lot of the time.

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She's lost 10 sizes. I understand the pace is much slower than weight loss shows but someone that has lost 10 sizes has a decent idea of what they need to do.

 

 

Yeah, I can't really criticize her.  Everyone loses weight at their own pace.  You can't measure them by someone else.  There might be underlying health issues we don't know about, but even so she's doing very well, IMO.  As someone who also struggles with weight, I can relate, and I admire how much she's done.  I know how hard it is, so I can't be critical. And she's looking so much better.

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As someone who weighed as much as Janelle did at her heaviest (and the same height, 5'4") I can definitely relate, however just by diet and exercise I was able to lose 80+ pounds in a year, and I've lost 40 more since and kept it off.  So I know it's tough, been there and living it every day.

 

That said, I would LIKE to see Janelle do better.  Most of my ire is saved for Sean, or as his hashtag on Twitter notes #tvtrainer.  Janelle's main issue, and I'm sure her priority, is to lose significant weight and sorry, she just doesn't seem to be doing that (I also doubt the 10 sizes.  Although it depends on how she's calculating them).  If Sean cared more about his client's personal goals and less about his OWN goals to get noticed and be a TV star, he'd hand her over to another trainer that's focused on fat loss, because he clearly is not.

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From the size of her backside on that climbing wall, I have to call bullshit on the 10 sizes thing.

 

Did Janelle say she's lost 10 sizes? The only possible way she could claim that is if she is fudging by counting sizes by ones:  28, 27, 26, etc. Of course, we women all know that clothing sizes go up and down by twos: 22, 18, 16, or 5, 7, 9, etc.  There is no way that Janelle went from, say, size 24 pants to size 8 pants: 24, 22, 20,18, 16, 14, 12, 10, 8.

 

There is a VERY rough estimate used that every 10 pounds lost is about 1 size down--that's not very handy, since we're all built differently and lose differently, but for the sake of argument, let's use that measurement--it would mean that Janelle has lost somewhere around 100 lbs. Nuh-uh.

 

I don't think she should race to the finish, Biggest Loser style, but she's been doing this for a LONG TIME now, probably close to two years. Even if she was just taking a daily brisk walk, eating lots of vegetables, fruit, whole grains, and lean protein, and limiting her intake to 1600-1800 calories (which is a pretty high target), she would have lost a much more significant amount of weight in this time. It's physics.

 

Ingrained habits and using food to self-medicate are at the heart of her continued struggle. No judgment toward her for that, either--it's been my struggle for many years (knowing what to do, but not actually doing it...). But I resent having that particular story trotted out for several seasons, as if we're all supposed to pretend along--I don't want to play! The emperor has no clothes!

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I remember Janelle mentioning last season (or maybe the season before, who knows) that she hadn't stuck to her diet and exercise like she should, and that she needed to get back into the right frame of mind.  As someone whose weight loss is like chipping away at marble, I can sympathize with her.  

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I think Janelle's problem is and always has been her diet. She doesn't cook so I doubt she's eating sensible meals. I also noticed Maddie is putting on a little weight - at the commitment ceremony, I mistook her for Mariah. All these women feed their kids garbage. Aspyn dropped a ton of weight at college. Most freshmen gain ten pounds or so. That leads me to believe eating relatively healthy food makes a difference.

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Janelle actually does cook, it's just not her favorite thing to do, she'd rather work.  TLC has recipes from each of the brown wives on their website, Janelle's is Peanut Butter Fritos and one other.  None of them were very healthy.  And I of course agree her problem is her diet, always has been.  And I also agree that Maddie's looking a little chunky, she was slimmer a couple seasons ago.

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