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Tara Ariano

S27.E07: Full Speed Ahead, Captain!

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Product placement is one thing, but I doubt any viewer wants to watch people working out their Fitbit Arithmetic.  "Here we are in Rotterdam (a.k.a. Amsterdam), and we're going to be doing... sums!"  Not compelling viewing.

 

Idk, I thought it was rather amusing watching Team Texas try to do math.  (I both like them and suck at math, so I was only partly laughing at them, not with them.)

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I am glad the Chacs are gone.  I didn't care for him at all, and the meanness in me came out when I couldn't stop laughing at his busted lip.  I found him to be an arrogant chauvinistic ass who had to constantly remind viewers that he was a doctor.  I noticed there was no "as a doctor, I'm used to treating patients, not being one" comment about his lip.  Loved Female Chac's comment that they have to have attention to detail in their professions, and then proceeded to ignore all of that on this leg.

 

Joey was great at the Sunflowers task.  He seemed to be the only one who was comparing each painting to each other.  In doing that, he was able to notice what was different about each one and how each might have been changed (he referenced the "dandelion" looking flower on the left, that many missed).  He did it the right way instead of the others who tried to rely on memory of what the real painting looked like.

 

But I do I cut the teams slack on all of the mental errors this episode, because it seemed evident many of them were just exhausted.  It was a double leg.  I suppose they could have recuperated some on the 2+ hour train ride to Rotterdam.  But all of the travel must be catching up to them.  When Texas checked in, Phil immediately asked them what country they were in.  I don't remember him asking them before at other pitstops, but it seemed clear that he must have asked before and they got it wrong.

 

I guess I don't see what's so criminal about the Newscasters saying "Hagoo".  I honestly don't think The Hague is as well known as everyone here seems to think.  It's something that you might have learned about in high school in history or government class, but it's not like it comes up in everyday conversation that often, and it's not really a tourist mecca.  Yes, they read the news, but they read the news in Santa Barbara.  Kelsey seems to be some kind of assignment reporter, who does stories probably on things like pollution at the beach, and Joey just reads a teleprompter.  Just because you read the news doesn't necessarily mean you are the most well-read or smartest people.  I'm willing to bet that more than 50% of middle America has never heard of The Hague.  Saddam Hussein and the trial was years ago, and even then, some people just don't care.  In addition to the killer fatigue, Joey was in a foreign country, and his mispronunciation is no more egregious to me than the many many mispronunciations we have heard over the years.

 

Justin is truly truly an insufferable ass.  I think he might be my most hated contestant ever.  Some of the ones in the past, I have loathed a lot, but Justin is on an another level entirely.  He has a very high opinion of himself, and he thinks that the world is lucky to be graced with him and his "charisma".  Gag.  Unfortunately, the competition this time around doesn't seem great.  I really hope he gets double U turned or something, or gets eliminated because of his own arrogance.  Yet even if he does win, I am telling myself that $1 million is maybe $600K after taxes.  Which is a nice chunk of change, but certainly not something you can retire on.  And some people might win and quit their jobs and work as a motivational speaker or something, but he just doesn't have the appealing personality to do that.

 

Add that to Rick's boneheaded idea to stay on the train making two stops vs. Denise & James Earl's direct train
Actually, that was the only smart bit of transport thinking they did all leg. Denise and James Earl's direct train was delayed an additional 10 minutes, and the 7 minute gap between scheduled departures probably wouldn't have been made up by two stops, as it's only a half-hour journey. Of course, if Denise and James Earl had got on the same train as the Chacs, then the Chacs would have been less likely to get on the wrong tram once they arrived in The Hague. It was that decision which sunk them.
I didn't think that Denise and James Earl learned about the 10 minute delay of their nonstop train until after the other one had left.  I think the Chacs made the wrong decision.  They weren't familiar with the Dutch train system, and had no idea how long trains stop at each station.  It seems to me that it's entirely likely that local trains would have to defer to express trains in the event they were both trying to use the same track.
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I think the cheerleaders cheered more as a hobby than a profession, 

Why would you think that?  Cheerleading for an NFL team is a real job.  Part-time, perhaps, and not well paid, but still a job/profession.

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Why would you think that? Cheerleading for an NFL team is a real job. Part-time, perhaps, and not well paid, but still a job/profession.

They are actually former cheerleaders. One is a speech pathogist and the other is a consultant, I think. I don't think most NFL cheerleaders make anywhere near enough to live on. That is why I would consider more of a hobby, though a paid one, than a real job.

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After Chac attack repeatedly telling us that they are very detail oriented because they are doctors, I had to laugh at all the dumb mistakes they made in this leg, the worst of which was saying, "We need to get on tram #1," and then getting on a tram with a big 9 on the front.

At the end when they said they were going to get started on their family, I cringed.  I hope they can figure out where all the parts go when one is trying to make a baby...

 

I kid, I kid!  KF really did them in, I think.  Also, I have to cut them a little slack on the Amsterdam/Rotterdam thing, having once booked a business flight to Montreal instead of Quebec City, because I figured QC was pretty close.  Uh.  Not.

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I've seen clue-givers pleased to receive hugs from racers, I've seen clue-givers stoically suffering through hugs from racers, but I have never seen a clue-giver initiate a hug before I saw the tulip-amassing woman step forward and hug Denise.  She must have just looked ultra wrung out or something!

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I start to take back a lot of the things I have said about last season and even the family season.  Because this group is dumb, dumb, DUMB.  

 

If they have the money and credit cards to burn, then yes.  That or you are in South Korea, your taxi goes the wrong way and oopsie, you're damn close to North Korea!

 

I think the ones I can sort of tolerate is the cheerleaders.  They seem to be more careful in picking detours that favour them better.

Now that's an idea for a season...have all the dumbest racers race against each other, because we definitely have enough for two full seasons. Besides half the people left this season, we have the wrestlers from S25, the tattooed couple who thought that they had raced to the country of London, the former Miss Teen South Carolina and her ugly as hell model boyfriend, and Jeff/Jordan of Big Brother fame.

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They are actually former cheerleaders. One is a speech pathogist and the other is a consultant, I think. I don't think most NFL cheerleaders make anywhere near enough to live on. That is why I would consider more of a hobby, though a paid one, than a real job.

Generally it differs from team to team, but on average a cheerleader earns around $70 to $90 per game.

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I feel kind of bad for ChacAttack because there are teams I dislike more and they weren't terrible racers. BUT, they made their own mistakes this leg and they weren't going to win anyway. Maybe it's better to leave now before KF really hits.

 

Last leg and this leg I really started to see how jerky Justin can be. It's not the exuberance that gets to me, it's the way he treats Diana.

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Generally it differs from team to team, but on average a cheerleader earns around $70 to $90 per game.

Cheerleaders are not employees of the team and "[p]rior to a lawsuit settled last September, the Oakland Raiders were paying their cheerleaders an hourly wage of just $5. Now, after the $1.25 million settlement, the Raiderettes can look forward to the same income as the team’s other minimum-wage employees..

 

In California, legislation proposed by Assemblywoman Lorena Gonzalez in January would require professional sports teams to recognize cheerleaders as their employees and pay them at least the state-mandated minimum wage." (http://time.com/3752957/nfl-football-cheerleaders-minimum-wage/)

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Last week, racers got mocked for trying to pronounce French with English rules (eagle-ite). This week, someone tries to accent the Hag(oo)(ue) and the same thing happens. Try, don't try, it's all fail.

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Well there's "ague" too - but I'll make excuses for them considering how long they had been racing...it's still funny, I'll agree on that. Of course after Adventures in French last week...

Also "Montague."

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Also "Montague."

We could "argue" about it forever. Seriously.

I'm not sure that James Earl actually made a decision about the trains. It seemed like he stood there NOT making a decision until it was out of his hands. Could be editing, though.

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Joey just reads a teleprompter.  Just because you read the news doesn't necessarily mean you are the most well-read or smartest people.  I'm willing to bet that more than 50% of middle America has never heard of The Hague.  Saddam Hussein and the trial was years ago, and even then, some people just don't care.  In addition to the killer fatigue, Joey was in a foreign country, and his mispronunciation is no more egregious to me than the many many mispronunciations we have heard over the years.

 

 

Fair or not, from now on anytime I see this this guy on the race, I am totally going to picture Ron Burgundy.

 

Also what was the deal with sending them to a vodka distillery and not having a task there or having them stop for a drink?

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I don't really mind Justin , he's a bit annoying but also a competent racer who sees the race as a race . And there were people one the race who treated their race partners way worse.

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How many times have we said over the years that we want to smack some of the stunt casting people because they didn't appreciate the opportunity to be on the Amazing Race and get off the show so someone who wants to be there can be there? I can deal with Justin.

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How many times have we said over the years that we want to smack some of the stunt casting people because they didn't appreciate the opportunity to be on the Amazing Race and get off the show so someone who wants to be there can be there? I can deal with Justin.

Enthusiasm does not absolve one from being an enormous jackass in nearly every moment on screen.

Fair or not, from now on anytime I see this this guy on the race, I am totally going to picture Ron Burgundy.

Also what was the deal with sending them to a vodka distillery and not having a task there or having them stop for a drink?

Good point. I was hoping Diana would get drunk and tell Justin what she really thinks of him.

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How many times have we said over the years that we want to smack some of the stunt casting people because they didn't appreciate the opportunity to be on the Amazing Race and get off the show so someone who wants to be there can be there? I can deal with Justin.

 

I think the difference is that Justin doesn't want to be on The Amazing Race.  Justin wants to be SEEN on The Amazing Race.  To preen and prance and spontaneously treat the world to a dose of Justin, all the while with a side-eye on the camera to be sure it is pointed his way.  He's no better than the worst mactor that ever ran the race solely to further their career. 

 

As for being a great racer, I'm not so sure it isn't a case of being the best of a bad bunch.  Sure, he ends up in front a lot, but not because he's demonstrated any exceptional racing talent.  It's just that the others are pretty crappy racers.  Justin's only skill is that he keeps going relentlessly, and flogs Diana like a rented mule to see that she does the same.  I suppose that is a racing skill...

 

I don't think Diana will dump him after the race.  I think he will dump her before she gets a chance.  I'm convinced he's only with her at all because he needs a race partner, and after the race, he won't need her any more.

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I don't really mind Justin , he's a bit annoying but also a competent racer who sees the race as a race . And there were people one the race who treated their race partners way worse.

True...at least Justin doesn't show abusive tendencies to Diana, unlike that one jackass who shoved his wife at a pitstop all because they came in second place instead of first, and also slammed a car trunk on her head.

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I didn't know whether to laugh or cry when the reporters said Ha-goo. But they are my favorite team left since they are competent drama-free racers. I hate the hats with their names though.

 

Without the hats I might have forgotten their names, they've been ignored so much thus far.

 

Loved that if they guessed wrong they had to put the painting back.

 

Which makes sense for the racer - why remove wrong choices for your competitors?

 

How is casting so unable to cast a more equal playing field? It seems like each season for the past few, there have been clearly dominant teams and then a lot of other folks bringing up the rear. Is it on purpose? Do they prefer to have the 1st place finishes dominated by 1 or 2 teams while everyone else is treated as background? I'd love to see a race where there was a true competitive field, with everyone roughly equally matched and you have no idea what is going to happen.

 

I don't think casting can really predict how a team will do until they actually run the race.  Teams that might seem like they'll be good competitors might be incompetent at navigating, unable to do a certain task, etc.  For example, the track athletes were probably expected to do much better than they did.

 

4. Good for the cheerleaders -- I don't like them, but I thought they were NUTS to take the double dutch task and I envisioned them being there all day long, but they did it after the second try.

 

I thought they would be naturals at it - it's essentially a dance step for them, something they're good at.  I don't know if any of the other teams could have pulled it off, though.

 

Product placement is one thing, but I doubt any viewer wants to watch people working out their Fitbit Arithmetic.  "Here we are in Rotterdam (a.k.a. Amsterdam), and we're going to be doing... sums!"  Not compelling viewing.  

 

Seeing team Texas struggle to subtract 28 from 52 was pretty entertaining, actually.

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11) James Earl choosing the later train. (Debatable, but was the wrong move)

If James Earl and Denise had taken the train with the Chaacs, the Chaacs would have stayed with them, avoided the whole tram#9 disaster, and been in a sprint to the mat.  I'd have put better odds on the Dr.'s in that situation.  And while it looked like James Earl dithered about until the choice was made for them, I thought it was the correct strategic choice - if they thought they'd lose in a foot race with the Chaacs.  It is similar to the strategy in choosing a detour when you know you are last: even if it sounds harder, if everyone else has taken one detour, you usually want to take the other.  (Exceptions exist for tasks that are completely in a teams sweet spot, but it's the strategic play.)

 

Fair or not, from now on anytime I see this this guy on the race, I am totally going to picture Ron Burgundy.

 

Also what was the deal with sending them to a vodka distillery and not having a task there or having them stop for a drink?

Maybe they did, and it just wasn't shown.  It'd explain a lot of the "stupidity," we had this episode.

 

Also, I'm guessing a lot of posters either haven't seen Season 6, or have (mercifully) blocked it from their memory.  You could cross the current version of Justin with an extra dose of camera-mugging from the Hippies, and give him an unpleasantness upgrade from Flo, and he still wouldn't be as objectionable as AssHat.  (From AssHat and Victoria, the aforementioned Season Six.  The Worst Contestant On This Show.  EVER.)

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I think the difference is that Justin doesn't want to be on The Amazing Race.  Justin wants to be SEEN on The Amazing Race.  To preen and prance and spontaneously treat the world to a dose of Justin, all the while with a side-eye on the camera to be sure it is pointed his way.  He's no better than the worst mactor that ever ran the race solely to further their career. 

 

As for being a great racer, I'm not so sure it isn't a case of being the best of a bad bunch.  Sure, he ends up in front a lot, but not because he's demonstrated any exceptional racing talent.  It's just that the others are pretty crappy racers.  Justin's only skill is that he keeps going relentlessly, and flogs Diana like a rented mule to see that she does the same.  I suppose that is a racing skill...

 

I don't think Diana will dump him after the race.  I think he will dump her before she gets a chance.  I'm convinced he's only with her at all because he needs a race partner, and after the race, he won't need her any more.

I agree with this post 100%, and more if that were mathematically possible.

 

He more wants to be seen than to actually passionately run the race.  I wouldn't at all be surprised to learn that he had applied for a bevy of other reality shows, with and without Diana.

 

And I also think that he has gotten lucky in having a group that doesn't have a lot of strong competition.  Right now, its the Texans, who have slipped and the Reporters...maybe the cheerleaders that might be able to get to the top.  But when one of the top teams in the competition decides to sight see instead of running the race, it just doesn't speak well for the level of competition.

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I'm willing to bet that more than 50% of middle America has never heard of The Hague.

 

Which is a poor reflection on American education, imo.

 

I thought the cheerleaders were very smart to take a task that they could do quickly and played to their strengths.  I thought the amount of time required doing the jumping and clapping was hard, but my daughter, a middle-school cheerleader, thought it was easy.  Oh the energy of the young.  Its a shame that apparently that task was further away from the pit-stop and they missed first place.

 

I thought I heard Justin say that the money he and Diane won would be used for their wedding.  Doesn't sound like they're breaking up.  Fit bit is certainly ramping up their advertising in TAR.

 

I couldn't believe the Texas guys decided to sight-see in Paris rather than try and get an earlier train, though I can understand the desire to see a city like Paris when you haven't been before.  I'm guessing they hadn't seen too many prior TAR seasons, though, to not think about faster transportation.  They are lucky it didn't cost them anymore time than the scheduled start times.

 

ChakAttack was fine to take the train with 2 stops, their downfall was getting on the wrong tram afterwards.  The Alabama team is lucky in that respect, because their train certainly wasn't faster than the earlier 2 stopper.

 

It looks like no non-elimination legs anymore, its all "to be continued/double" legs.  I think I like that better.  I bet it saves a bit of money too, because its less first-place prizes, less cost involved to put the teams up for pit-stops that no longer exist, and less cost/hassle in arranging for the speed bump.

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I think what makes me so uncomfortable is Justin's tone when he speaks to Diana doesn't remind me of a boyfriend and girlfriend -- it reminds me of a parent and an older child. He treats Diana like she's a misbehaving teenager and he's her daddy. The whole walking vs. taxi thing -- a bickering couple would've been like "I told you we should've taken a taxi!" not this bizarre look back like "There's another team -- now look what you've done." It's not abusive, it's just...imbalanced. I'd almost feel better if Justin did yell at her. Then it would at least be a relationship of equals, not this "disappointed daddy" routine. They remind me more of a father/daughter couple than anything romantic.

 

And it's creepy. #FreeDiana

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1. I can not wait for someone to wipe that smug, asshole smile from Justin's face.  Can't wait. 

 

Yep, me too.

 

2. Sad to see ChacAttack go -- I realized that they weren't everyone's cup of tea, but they both seemed so supportive of each other even the chips were absolutely down.  Even in their worst moment they didn't resort to the same asshole antics that I saw from Justin.  He seems to have a pretty good spirit and I think with time, he will learn to listen more to his wife.  They got me all verklempt in their little exit blurb.

 

I didn't think he was supportive of her at all - first he shuts down the very sensible idea of catching a taxi, then he tells her to "stop sulking" after 30 minutes of sitting around waiting for a bus. 

 

There were three points where I was wondering what the hell was wrong with this team - why they didn't ask on the train about Rotterdam, why they didn't ask the guy at the bus stop where the tram stop was (it must have been reasonably close given all the other teams got there with no hassles) and why on earth they didn't ask whether the tram was going to the Peace Palace BEFORE they got on it.

 

What makes Chac Attack's mistake even more mind boggling is that the clue said Rotterdam (which he for some reason thought meant Amsterdam) but they passed the Rotterdam stop without getting off the train. If the Amsterdam stop came before the Rotterdam stop and they got off at it, it would have been a bit more understandable.

 

Yeah, this.  I was looking at the "Rotterdam Centraal" sign and thinking "wouldn't you get off here, even if you thought you were in a suburb of Amsterdam or something?"

 

Speaking of distances, the Double Dutch challenge was 2km / a mile and a bit from Rotterdam Centraal and the ship simulator challenge, so that added an extra 20-30 minutes to the cheerleaders' Detour.

 

Damn.  If they'd gotten it on the first try they probably would have made the train that Green Team were on.  I was really hoping the cheerleaders would win this leg.

 

I don't know if it's well integrated, but I'd love to see the exchange: "You've been counting your steps throughout this leg. Do you know what this is all about?" - "But of course! Product placement!"

 

I think my favorite bit from the episode was on the tram. "Does this tram go to the Peace Palace?" - "No, it goes to the beach." There is something superbly absurd and funny about this juxtaposition.

 

Hee.  To both of those comments.

 

Based on the time I was in the Netherlands and interacting with people there in English, the greeter at the place that they drop the flowers sounds suspiciously too American. Her accent, intonation and choice of words are not what I expect from a typical Dutch.

 

My first thought was that she was a former exchange student. 

 

I think what makes me so uncomfortable is Justin's tone when he speaks to Diana doesn't remind me of a boyfriend and girlfriend -- it reminds me of a parent and an older child. He treats Diana like she's a misbehaving teenager and he's her daddy. The whole walking vs. taxi thing -- a bickering couple would've been like "I told you we should've taken a taxi!" not this bizarre look back like "There's another team -- now look what you've done." It's not abusive, it's just...imbalanced. I'd almost feel better if Justin did yell at her. Then it would at least be a relationship of equals, not this "disappointed daddy" routine. They remind me more of a father/daughter couple than anything romantic.

 

And it's creepy. #FreeDiana

 

Yes.  Between that and male Chaq's "Stop sulking" there was a lot of infantalising of teammates going on this episode.

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Justin is becoming pretty unbearable.  You'd think he would have thanked Diana for them not taking a cab since the extra walking might have added to their cash win.

 

I don't think it's fair for people to attack Chac's quality as a doctor based on the mistakes in this episode.  Having said that, thinking that the French called Amsterdam "Rotterdam" was certainly a unique misconception.  I wouldn't have minded them surviving a few more weeks.  I actually thought they would get a penalty for taking the bus instead of the tram.  I don't understand what was happening there.

 

I liked how the Cheerleaders said they weren't following people anymore, and how they didn't end up with any transportation snafus.  They know how to play to their strengths, in choosing the skipping rope.  Too bad they didn't beat Team Green.

 

I would like the Reporters more if they didn't seem so sour grapes.  I think a little less of them for conspiring with Team Texas a few weeks before, though this is a team I would probably want to win, given the competition.

 

I liked Team Texas exploring the city so I was glad they didn't lose out too much.

 

It was frustrating that there was another line-up task.  

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On 11/6/2015 at 6:00 PM, Haleth said:

Ok, it's confirmed. This is the dumbest cast ever:

Ha-goo?

 

On 11/6/2015 at 6:01 PM, Tim McD said:

Hagoo? Really?

 

On 11/13/2015 at 11:51 PM, Kromm said:

Yes. Mr. Hagoo lives there. The guy who can't see.

 

On 11/14/2015 at 11:49 AM, Ducky said:

 

Mr. Hagoo is Mr Magoo's twin brother.

I amused myself to no end by making this same connection, and then jokingly shouting out "Roadhaag! <beep beep>" over the course of the episode..

Edited by hincandenza

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