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Is There a Price Point You're Comfortable With?: Dress Budgets


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3 hours ago, cpcathy said:

Bummer, I can't see it when I click on it.

Success!!!  Took a snow day to learn how to reduce a photo but I did it!!!  Yay!  And yes my hubby is six foot seven.  My $60 dress-  thanks Amazon prime.  Alterations were minimal (needed hemming) and my shoes were bought the day before for $4.50 the day before, gold flats.  Yes I am that budget minded.  My bouquet was about $65 if anyone is curious.

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2 hours ago, dogdays2 said:

What I don't understand is why no one hits the reality button.  I was very fortunate in that my (not rich) parents were willing to let me have the dress of my dreams, within reason.   NONE of the dresses I considered even approached the $5,000 - $15,000 we seem brides routinely quote on SYTTD.  At some point in the process, I decided I was not going to ask my parents to spend thousands of dollars on a dress I'd wear once -- even if this was the "most important dress of my life."  We found a spectacular dress (IMHO) for under $1500.  Now this was years ago, but even today, talking around $2500.  I still love it, 20+ years later -- and love the fact no one went to the poor house to buy it. 

I also wonder where these folks find the money.  We see brides buying one or more dresses where the price point just for the dress is $12,000.  This doesn't include alterations, veil, shoes, lingerie, jewelry -- not to mention the entire rest of the wedding.  There are either some seriously wealthy people out there or they are going seriously into debt.  Just sayin' . . .

Bolding mine - do people earn $250,000 a year that this is a drop in the bucket?  Do they sell land?  My dad passed when I was twenty but I could TOTALLY of heard him, "Look, I will pitch in X amount, the rest is up to you."  And I would have been grateful for that.  My dad was my bud, don't get me wrong, he was just practical!  (Wonder where I get it?)

Edited by Mrs. Hanson
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The "average" cost of a wedding in the US is now approaching $30,000 -- closer to $55,000 in NY, SF, DC and other high-cost cities -- and that does not include a $12,000 dress.   I suspect that more than a few folks (wedding couples and/or their families) are taking out loans to pay for these weddings. because most people in the US do not earn enough to pay for this out of pocket.   Since financial woes are probably the leading cause of divorce, if the couple's forking out the money, they're potentially sabotaging their marriage for the sake of a wedding day.  If it's the parents, in a few short years, the kids who had the great wedding will have to support their parents who spent the retirement fund on the wedding.  It's very short sighted. 

The above said, a friend of mine who got married within weeks of me did her entire wedding for less than $2000, which included a church wedding and reception for about 100 people.  But there was no $12,000 dress . . .

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22 hours ago, dogdays2 said:

The "average" cost of a wedding in the US is now approaching $30,000 -- closer to $55,000 in NY, SF, DC and other high-cost cities -- and that does not include a $12,000 dress. 

One trend I see happening is to buy the groom and his groomsmen suits they can wear after the wedding rather than renting tuxedos.  My former boss, who is well-to-do, put a price limit on the wedding for his daughter, but I think even with making some practical choices, it was still around $30,000.  I'm sure a bit of that was for the wedding planner, which they needed since it was an out-of-town wedding.   I think he spent as much for his son's wedding though because his soon-to-be DIL went with a black tie wedding.  They had to fly out to a swanky place on the west coast (I'm in the South), so that cost a bit for them.  Adding insult to injury, his DIL wanted him to pay for an open bar at the reception.  My bosses wife put her foot down on that idea!    Anyway, I'm sure the price of a photographer is pretty expensive too.  They've gotten away from the "stand there and pose" shots to some very creative ones.  I like all of the new ideas, but I know that it can't be cheap!  I talked to a guy not long ago that's in the photography business.  He uses a drone to fly over outdoor weddings so that the bride and groom can go back and see it from a guest's perspective when they walked down the aisle.  That's a cool idea, but you're going to pay for it!

 

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The above said, a friend of mine who got married within weeks of me did her entire wedding for less than $2000, which included a church wedding and reception for about 100 people.  But there was no $12,000 dress . . .

Your friend budgeted well!  Good for her!    Mr. Chat and I eloped.  I regret not having a small ceremony with family, but I would've never been able to spend the money like a lot of the brides we see on this show do.  I don't begrudge them that, but I agree, that's a hell of a lot of money to spend for a wedding.

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Mrs.Hanson, you look so lovely!  Great job.  What a striking couple!  You really did do a a great job.  Thanks for the photo.

I really lucked up on my gown.  Walked in, saw the gown, only one...tired it on.  It fit perfectly, I loved everything about it and I bought it immediately.  AND it was on sale for under $1500.00.  I wouldn't have paid more than that either.  To each his own, but, some of the $3000. gowns on the show, appear just as pretty as those for over $5000.

Edited by SunnyBeBe
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1 hour ago, SunnyBeBe said:

Mrs.Hanson, you look so lovely!  Great job.  What a striking couple!  You really did do a a great job.  Thanks for the photo.

I really lucked up on my gown.  Walked in, saw the gown, only one...tired it on.  It fit perfectly, I loved everything about it and I bought it immediately.  AND it was on sale for under $1500.00.  I wouldn't have paid more than that either.  To each his own, but, some of the $3000. gowns on the show, appear just as pretty as those for over $5000.

Aw shucks....thanks.  Per the tux idea:  None of the guys in our wedding matched and I loved it.  My older son wore a black wool suit jacket that we bought at Savers for $7.50......no I am not kidding.  I didn't even figure in the cost of my dress, as to me a budget is things that affect your guests comfort, meaning venue, food, drinks, chairs, etc.

Posing for photos was a hoot as we usually don't stand around looking at each other longingly. LOL!  

Per price points:  Good gosh - are you really spending that much??  And now the trend is to buy TWO dresses?

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I love getting bargains.  It makes things so much more fun, imo.  I love quality too and you have to strike a balance, but, suffering for the next 3 years due to overspending for a wedding is just outrageous to me. 

I can't imagine getting 2 dresses for the event, no matter how in style it is.  If I do it again, I'd likely go more like you did, Mrs.Hanson.

Edited by SunnyBeBe
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32 minutes ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I love getting bargains.  It makes things so much more fun, imo.  I love quality too and you have to strike a balance, but, suffering for the next 3 years due to overspending for a wedding is just outrageous to me. 

I can't imagine getting 2 dresses for the event, no matter how in style it is.  If I do it again, I'd likely go more like you did, Mrs.Hanson.

Thank you again!!  I am going to cut my dress to tea length and dye it burgundy, plum, garnet......not sure exactly but then wear it on our anniversary each year!!!  (Awww........)

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29 minutes ago, SunnyBeBe said:

That's a good idea, but, I like it white.  But, since it's winter, a darker color for anniversary makes sense.  I like the lace. 

I love lace too!!!  I HATE IT when, on this show, people are all:  "Lace?  You will look like a tablecloth!"  No you won't, you will look classy and timeless.  Then those same family members who hate lace want a stripper dress cut down to there.  

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3 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I love getting bargains.  It makes things so much more fun, imo.  I love quality too and you have to strike a balance, but, suffering for the next 3 years due to overspending for a wedding is just outrageous to me. 

I can't imagine getting 2 dresses for the event, no matter how in style it is.  If I do it again, I'd likely go more like you did, Mrs.Hanson.

I could see getting/wearing two dresses if your ceremony dress is a big ball gown like what Serena Williams wore. Something like that didn't seem to easily go into a bustle so have a second lighter dress to dance in and greet guests in seems like a must have.

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I wore my mother's wedding gown, didn't even alter it. (A very pretty, simple tea length gown with a crinoline underneath, with long sleeves and slight beading on the bodice.) I believe it cost about $60 in 1959 when mom went by herself during her lunch hour and bought it. We held the ceremony in my husband's aunt's back yard under a rented trellis. A few snacks as it was an afternoon wedding. I think the cake was the most expensive thing - if I remember right, it cost about $150. The whole wedding came in for about $500 - my father was VERY pleased with me. Granted, I got married in 1988, but I simply can't imagine spending the money some of these brides do though I do seem to enjoy watching them and being appalled at their antics, lol.

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I saw an older episode where the older bride bought a dress for herself and 3 daughters (one who was barely walking) and her mom and spent something like 75k! And the dresses were ... they were just too much. I thought her sentiment was sweet (wanting to include her daughters) but unless either she or her husband are rich that just seems crazy to spend. Her daughters were young and will grow so likely can’t even wear the dress that many times more. She probably could have gotten custom made dresses for much less. 

Her dress alone was 30k. 

 

For the cost of her dress alone she could have flown to India first class, gotten the dress and embroidery done for all of them, and still have 10k leftover!

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On 2/4/2018 at 9:35 PM, Kohola3 said:

75K would have put some of those kids through college.  Instead she blew it on ugly Pnina dresses.  It was just stupid.

As someone with two kids in college that is really hard to read and or hear.  Seriously.  I help my kids as much as I can but to give them the gift of being debt free would be tremendous!

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I think second hand is a great idea, as a bride could probably get something she maybe couldn't afford brand new.  I'd just be concerned it may have a stain, rip, etc, somewhere they are hiding.

The other thing is getting the right size. If someone is buying used online they should probably go try on to see what looks good & what fits, first.  There was a bride on one of the Four Weddings shows that bought a 'pre-loved' dress but it was way too small. The sizes run differently for bridal gowns & she probably just bought her usual size.  I could hardly breathe just looking at her.

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