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Season Three: Time to Snuggle Up And Watch Our Couchies!


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"I had a superhero name in college. Lesbionic Woman"

"Not Dax Sheppard. Dax THE Sheppard"

I was choking I was laughing so hard.

When I try to explain this show to people it comes out sounding so stupid. I find myself saying "seriously, it is hilarious." Then I think back to one of my favorite moments from the season when Julie was mocking how old Andrea looked in the 90210 movie ("I've gotta go my arthritis is really acting up") and laugh like a maniac as the people slowly back away...

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I'm not sure why the editors were so enthralled with multiple shots of Julie and Brandy eating chips and salsa, but even that made me laugh.

 

Teddi's world-weary attitude is starting to grow on me: "My kids have had eight weddings." She's over it.

 

Supergirl: "Is this guy going to turn around and be sexy? Come on, no whammies!"

 

And Princella brings it home:

"What position would you play on a women's football team?"

"The coach."

Edited by lordonia
  • Love 4
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So last night the Egber dad was telling the son that sits to the right that one day when he is married he will have to learn to defer to his wife (paraphrasing).  The son and the mom sort of looked at each other and seemed to be stifling a laugh.  I am wondering if the son is gay and the mom knows but they haven't told Papa Egber?  Did anyone else catch that?  I have always sort of assumed both Egber sons are gay.  Which one is the older one?

 

My favorite is Julie and Brandy.  I immediately recognized Julie from the time she appeared on one episode of the Sopranos - Season 4.  She played the daughter of Dr. Melfi's therapist colleauge who went to the same university as Meadow and got her to sign up to work at that legal aide center.  I also love the Zenos.  I like the gay guys, the Egbers, and the grannies as well.  Least favorite is the Resnicks and the Persian sisters aren't really my favorite either.  One of the sisters just tries a little too hard for me.

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"Remember matches?   I mean, how do people even solve murders anymore without matchbooks?"

"Oh, look, it's like a coke line."

"Or a slash, with a knife."

 

"What do you wear to a Billy Idol concert?  It would take me hours to figure it out."

 

I loved every minute of the Hero Dog Awards (yes, I watched that show) and the people watching it with their doggies.  The Zenos need a Leonidas.  :-)

  • Love 3
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So last night the Egber dad was telling the son that sits to the right that one day when he is married he will have to learn to defer to his wife (paraphrasing).  The son and the mom sort of looked at each other and seemed to be stifling a laugh.  I am wondering if the son is gay and the mom knows but they haven't told Papa Egber?  Did anyone else catch that?  I have always sort of assumed both Egber sons are gay.  Which one is the older one?

 

From what I've seen in the media about them, the entire family operates under the assumption that both sons are hetero. Speculation here may differ. :)

 

Sam sits next to his dad and is the older son.

 

Seemed like the editors had fun showing up Julie and Brandy with Diana Ross' son clips. You two aren't the only ones who know who he is! It would have been super funny if the grannies had mentioned it, but then, they're unaware of YOLO and MILF.

 

How have I watched so much TV and never heard about lingerie football teams? That was ... something.

  • Love 1
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So last night the Egber dad was telling the son that sits to the right that one day when he is married he will have to learn to defer to his wife (paraphrasing).  The son and the mom sort of looked at each other and seemed to be stifling a laugh.  I am wondering if the son is gay and the mom knows but they haven't told Papa Egber?  Did anyone else catch that?  I have always sort of assumed both Egber sons are gay.  Which one is the older one?

I caught that too.  It was kind of like, "Okay, Dad, whatever."  I'm just worried whether the bed could accommodate another couchie.

 

This show is my favorite hour of my television week.  I love their comments and their reactions.  It would be great to be Brandy's and Julie's friend because those girls are a riot.  The banter leaves me in stitches and those chihuahuas just add to the hilarity.  And I seriously hope Zeno son never comes home with crabs.

  • Love 3
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"I had a superhero name in college. Lesbionic Woman"

"Not Dax Sheppard. Dax THE Sheppard"

I was choking I was laughing so hard.

When I try to explain this show to people it comes out sounding so stupid. I find myself saying "seriously, it is hilarious." Then I think back to one of my favorite moments from the season when Julie was mocking how old Andrea looked in the 90210 movie ("I've gotta go my arthritis is really acting up") and laugh like a maniac as the people slowly back away...

 

This is me too - I have tried to get friends to watch it and they think I'm crazy but I know if they watched it once they'd be hooked. There were so may favorites last night - as always for me the best lines come from the Zeno's, Julie and Brandy, the grannies, and the gay guys. My second tier is the Egbers. I agree that Papa Egber seems to be in the dark about his sons but could be wrong about that.

 

I loved Brandy and Julie doing the leg pedalling dance moves - the Dax the Shephard line - that look they gave either other during Lauren Manzo's wedding - and the chips and salsa eating.

 

I especially loved when Princella was telling the story about returning her rented wedding dress and the clerk telling her for $75 more she could buy it and the way she said where am I gonna wear that again!!! She is always hilarious. I would love to watch TV with the Zenos, the gay guys and Julie and Brandy, any day of the week.

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I'm starting to appreciate the Resnicks and their dogs (new white one last night, right?) more these days. The girls all dream-dating Italian boyfriends was pretty funny. I forgot what exactly, but the dad actually said something this time. His stolid demeanor is a nice contrast to the girls' excitability.

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I loved every minute of the Hero Dog Awards (yes, I watched that show) and the people watching it with their doggies.  The Zenos need a Leonidas.  :-)

 

I think Mom Zeno is allergic.

 

I liked everyone doing Supergirl flying arms.  The Yolo discussion with the old ladies.  That no one could remember Jeremy Sisto except from Clueless.

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I think Mom Zeno is allergic.

 

I liked everyone doing Supergirl flying arms.  The Yolo discussion with the old ladies.  That no one could remember Jeremy Sisto except from Clueless.

 

Has no one watched Six Feet Under?  I feel so OLD.  ;-)

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Jeremy Sisto and Rachel Griffiths-ick, ick

Jeremy Sisto and Lauren Ambrose-ick

He'll always be Billy Chenowith in my mind's eye

Can you believe it's been 10 years since Six Feet ended?

 

Fan of Suburgatory especially the Tess character.

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Suburgatory. The guy was on Law and Order! Everyone but me watches that.

I've never seen an episode of Law and Order. I'll go one better, I've also never seen an episode of any of the CSI shows either.

There's enough bad shit in the world, when I watch TV I want to laugh.

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Cooks, so many I had to take notes. I agree, stellar episode. I think I'll keep to show people when I try to explain this show.

 

Real Housewives of Atlanta

Emerson: Cynthia got the middle peach!
Scott: Escandelo!

 

About Peter

Amanda: You disrespectful, bald, disgusting, wanna think you can have anything better than me nasty son-of-a-bitch!
Kenya: Ow! She said it!

 

Zeno mom: She finished Chateu Sheree?
Zeno dad: I would hope so, dammit! ... Noooo uh!

 

RHOA Kenya: "The neighbors have a lot to say about Chateau 'she can't pay'"

Scott: There's so much real estate shade going on!
 

RHOA Kenya: "Let me take you on a tour..."
Julie: .. Of the old slaughterhouse.

 

Emerson: Oh! That was not a good oh! Oh Kenya honey, no.
 

In response to Kenya's house comment to Sheree:

Zeno dad: Don't do that Kenya. Don't do that! Not when we just did a drive by to your crib! Don't do that!

 

Scott: I can't believe we didn't see Tootie!
Emerson: They gotta save, it would have been too much.
Scott: It is NEVER too much for Tootie!

 

Ash versus Evil Dead

Brandy: There's only a couple of good things you find in a plastic bag, and weed's one of them!

 

Zeno Son: Can you turn the TV on mute? I don't want them um ... conjuring up stuff.

 

Emerson: Sir! If you cannot defeat a little 10" doll, I'm a little worried about the rest of this show!

 

Scott: You don't think he's missing a few sandwiches from his picnic basket?
Emerson: No .. I just don't think they're like, really fancy sandwiches.

 

Scott: All of this happened because he smoked pot and read that book? 
Blake: Marijuana. It's a gateway drug.

 

Pageant Coach

Pageant girl falls down

Emerson: Girl! You can't even walk through the parking lot, how you gonna walk to a runway?

Following dance routine

Zenos: Everyone cracks the hell up.

 

Coach corrects dance routine doing turns
Emerson: Amen sir, I say amen!
Blake: I mean, his pivot turn IS exquisite.
Emerson: Yaass!

 

Coach: "You got a kardashian butt, use it."

Scott (gleefully): Stop it right NOW!!

 

Blake: He and Tom Christley would make the cutest couple.
Scott: I was just thinking that!

 

MasterChef Junior

Zeno mom: (to son) Every year you say you gonna help with Thanksgiving.

Zeno dad: Hahahaha!

Zeno mom: You say you gonna help too and you don't!

 

Egber son: Who gives a kid a torch??

 

Zeno dad: I know what dish I would make. The secret ingredient is marshmallows. I would put pickles and chocolate with that.
Zeno mom: You'll be the first one sent home.

 

Agent X

Brandy: It's like there always needs to be the words "Agent" and "X" ...
Julie: Those are the words I need to be IN!

 

Emerson: Can we talk about the soft filter on her close-up? She called Barbara Walters and asked what do you use.

 

Exorcism

Zeno dad: What if we actually went somewhere and the place was possessed?
Zeno mom: Then I would leave! If I see some spiders in the house, I would leave. You know I'm not staying around for no demon!

 

Special mentions
- Zeno Dad intently watching Blindspot and sipping out of a huge teacup.
- Pee Wee snatching chip right as Brandy goes to bite.

Edited by SnarkKitty
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The Zenos laughing at the tap dancer was EVERYTHING!

I laughed so hard at that. They all paused for about 3 seconds then started laughing at the same time.

This is the only thread I've seen here where people mostly just quote the show instead if discussing it.

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Blindspot

 

Brandy : My tattoos are saying "Go to rehab" and "You're overdrawn on your bank account".

 

Brandy : I could get a tattoo in less time than it would take me to figure out what the fuck is going on.

 

Julie : I wonder when dog tattoos are going to become a thing.

Brandy : The tattoos are clues to where all the cheese sticks and beggin' strips are buried.

 

Peewee grabbing the potato chip out of Julie's hand and Julie grabbing it back from him and eating it with a dirty look was too funny.

 

I look forward to this show every week, and just never get tired of it. 

Edited by walnutqueen
  • Love 8
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How did I not know about the Alabama pageant coach? He may be the replacement for my Toddlers & Tiaras fix. (Which I stopped watching when the mamas got too mean and crazy)

 

The chihuahua (PeeWee?) takes no prisoners. And Julie meets her head-on.

 

Love Papa Zeno's joyful laugh.

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Julia vs Pee Wee vs the potato chip -- I watched that frame by frame on slow mo about 5 times. I was doubled over laughing. Julie grabbing the chip back out of his mouth and eating it herself did me in.

 

Have to say when I watched Agent X, I had the same thought as Destiny wrt bringing that actor guy home except that I don't mind being a stepmother. Hubba hubba.

 

Andy Egber and the Latin exorcism: "Did he say Jason Priestley?"

 

And Julie? vagina123 is not a secure password!

Edited by lordonia
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Scott, Blake and Emerson were on fire last night... these were some of my favorites.  (I'll have to remember the "not really fancy sandwiches" line...that was great.)

Scott: I can't believe we didn't see Tootie!
Emerson: They gotta save, it would have been too much.
Scott: It is NEVER too much for Tootie!

 

Scott: You don't think he's missing a few sandwiches from his picnic basket?
Emerson: No .. I just don't think they're like, really fancy sandwiches.

 

Scott: All of this happened because he smoked pot and read that book? 
Blake: Marijuana. It's a gateway drug.

 

 

Also, no grannies again this week....hmmm.  Although they appeared in the preview for next week's episode.  I wonder if they don't want to film 100% of the time, or if Bravo films the three of them, but then doesn't include them in the episode if there's nothing really interesting that comes from them...? 

Edited by MMLEsq
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Julie, the dog, and the chip scene was so funny that I watched it about 3 or 4 times. This show is the funniest reality show ever. They should have a contest where a show viewer gets a chance to watch TV with the couchers of their choice. Hmmm. Nah. That might just mess up the dynamic...

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"So that's where Richard Simmon's been."

Oh lord, I was gasping for breath after that one. I called it that the Zenos watching Ash vs. the Evil Dead would be comedy gold. Emerson, Blake, & Palmer had some great lines too.

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psychoticstate, what did the guys retweet? Something you said about the show?

 

The chip looked like a Pringle to me. We had the Chili's tie-in last week, so snack food companies should be getting in on the action. "Pringles! Bet you can't fight your dog over just one!"

 

All the couchers put their snacks out in bowls (or in the case of the Zenos and Red Vines, a large colored tumbler to hold them upright). I assume that's so that packaging/brand names aren't shown, but it's a missed marketing opportunity.

 

Sorry Teddi, but you have the worst spread. Or best, if you care about eating healthy.

 

Of course B/S/E have the most self control and rarely eat anything. I'm reminded of Ru Paul having his Drag Race contestants in for a 1:1 dinner, which consists of a single breath mint.

 

It was a bonding moment to see the couchers be so concerned about the kids who were crying on Master Chef Junior. We know!!

Edited by lordonia
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Scott, Blake and Emerson were on fire last night... these were some of my favorites.  (I'll have to remember the "not really fancy sandwiches" line...that was great.)

Yes! The whole night I while I was taking notes I was like, damn, Emerson is on fire tonight! He's getting ALL the quotes.

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It was a bonding moment to see the couchers be so concerned about the kids who were crying on Master Chef Junior. We know!!

I was with dad on the "suck it up, kid" part.  Kids need to understand life ain't all sunshine and butterflies, or marshmallows for that matter.

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I was with dad on the "suck it up, kid" part.  Kids need to understand life ain't all sunshine and butterflies, or marshmallows for that matter.

 

:)

 

There's a coucher for everyone!

 

Who do you guys most identify with? I would say Ayn because she and I are around the same age with similar marital histories, except she doesn't even know what MILF is! Maybe I'm a combo of her and Princella, since neither one of us is investigating ghosts, living in a house with spiders, going to Mars, camping naked, or playing football.

Edited by lordonia
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