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Favorite Quotes: "What the hell goes on at night in this house?!"


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(edited)

"Did you hear that sound?"

 

"Yeah, and as long as I'm in my own bed I'll do what I want."

 

"Oh, you heard that? I thought I was safe backed up against these pillows."

 

OSM Mom…I didn't notice you already posted the same thing.

Edited by CyberJawa1986
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"Oh, you heard that? I thought I was safe backed up against these pillows."

OSM Mom…I didn't notice you already posted the same thing.

No worries. Great minds think alike. ;)

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(edited)

"Now, look here, Stretch. I have a hundred cheese puffs and a sensitive assistant both on the verge of collapse. Whatever the problem is, overlook it. My mother did with my marriage."

 

*Dorothy turns and stares*

 

"And if you say something smart, I'll slap you silly."

Edited by Cobalt Stargazer
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(edited)

"I manage to live 80, 81 years. I've had pneumonia, two operations, a stroke. One night I'll belch and Stable Mabel here'll blow my head off."

Edited by ATWTer76
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Dorothy: "It is really coming down out there!"

Rose: "What's coming down?"

Dorothy: "The Liberace Marquee at Caesar's Palace."

 

 

Big Daddy: "You're still as pretty as a ladybug sunnin' itself on a lillypad on a misty spring day south of Savannah."
Dorothy: "Could you be a little more specific, Big Daddy?"

 

Sven: "You didn't tell them about kissing me?"
Rose: "Kissing him?!"

Sven: "Or stroking my hair?"

Rose: "Stroking his hair?!"

Sven: "Or feeding me?"

Dorothy: "...Alright, I'll say it. Feeding him?!"
 

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(edited)

Blanche: Rose! That cake's from the Get It While It's Hot Erotic Bakeshop!

Dorothy: Wooooooooo!

Blanche: "Why, Rose Nylund, that cake's in the shape of a..."

Dorothy: "We know what it looks like, Blanche!"

Rose: "I thought it was in the shape of Florida!"

Blanche: "That reminds me...I gotta give Charlie Milburn a call."

Dorothy: "If this cake reminds you of Charlie Milburn, we could BOTH give him a call!"

Edited by ATWTer76
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As a big Star Wars fan…and excited with all the SW news coming out recently:

 

Blanche: "My mistake. I thought since you look like Yoda you were also wise."

 

I also love Dorothy's replies when the others poked fun at her looks:

 

Dorothy: "Why don't I just wear a sign that says, "Too Ugly To Live?"

 

or

 

Blanche: "Dorothy, this is crazy! Since when do you care how you look?"
Dorothy: "I think it started when I came down from the bell tower and had my hump fixed!"

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(edited)

Nurse DeFarge (paraphrased): "Oh by the way Dororthy, a man called wanting to know if you were free Saturday night, but I forgot to write down the number, sorry"

Dorothy: "HASTA LA VISTA, BABY"

 

The timing and delivery on this line was perfection (of course any lines delivered by Bea usually are)

 

Also from this episode:

Dorothy: "I am Pussycat No. 1 YOU are Pussycat No. 2!"

 

Edited by Joan van Snark
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"Dorothy, didn't you have something you wanted to do?  Some kind of secret desire you always kept on the back burner?"

"Mm, well, I always wanted to try a nudist camp."

"Some big pots belong on the back burner."

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"I am contouring my eyebrows. I use Miss Christie Brinkley as a guide because we have exactly the same bone structure. I just hope she doesn't let herself go to pot after that baby comes. I don't want that big-eyed husband of hers coming after me."

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(edited)

Rose: "I thought Miles was a chihuahuah. It turns out he was a rat!"

Sophia: "You know, I once prepared a six-course meal with what I thought was chicken. But it turned out to be—"

Dorothy: "Ma!"

::pause::

Dorothy: "Rose, in my heart, I cannot believe that Miles is a rat. He just fell in with the wrong people, that’s all. Now, look, I know you have a date with him tomorrow night, keep it. I’m sure you’ll fine he’s the same caring, sensitive man you’ve known all along. My God, it wasn’t my confirmation dinner, was it?!"

Edited by Blakeston
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"Hey, you know these peas taste just like fresh? But you can't mix 'em with the mashed potatoes. They should have a tunnel running from the pea compartment to the mashed potato compartment."

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Dorothy: "Rose, in my heart, I cannot believe that Miles is a rat. He just fell in with the wrong people, that’s all. Now, look, I know you have a date with him tomorrow night, keep it. I’m sure you’ll fine he’s the same caring, sensitive man you’ve known all along. My God, it wasn’t my confirmation dinner, was it?!"

 

Sophia: "It really made everybody laugh when your father made the little feet dance."

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"All I wanted was a tan on my thighs. Now I’ll probably end up a prisoner of the revolution. They’ll rip my blouse and make me cook for the officers and spit food in my face and make fun of my recipes. Eventually, I’ll catch the eye of some fat general with big sweat stains under his arms. He’ll force me to let out his uniforms and satisfy his ugly needs."

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"I don’t really mind Clayton being homosexual, I just don’t like him dating men."
"You really haven’t grasped the concept of this 'gay' thing yet, have you, Blanche?"
"Well there must be homosexuals who date women."
"Yeah. They’re called lesbians."

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