S01.E11: Eats, Shoots, And Leaves / S01.E12: Wild Things

[toodles]

I fast forwarded through most of this, but the SEASON FINALE? Really, show, really? It's under the dome, but with dangerous Brentwood kitties. Which btw, I'm still waiting to see.

[mertensia]

Leopards have been known to stash kills in trees so this didn't bug me.

Oh Mitch, Jaime is no good for you; choose Abe. Stability and wisdom. Also Abe is better-looking.

Why the hell did Jaime open the door again? Right: she's dumb as a box of rocks.

Okay now crocodiles are infected? When did it jump to reptiles?

[Ohwell]

I thought so too, but on re-watch, it was a nurse.

Oh, ok, thanks.  Too bad for the nurse as well but I remembered the doctor more so that's why I was concerned that he got eaten.

[Ellaria]

Yes, none of it makes sense.  The only thing that makes sense is that none of it makes sense...

 

There's too many double and triple and quadruple crosses here.  

 

This team of writers cannot handle triple crosses and double agents and the like. I envision them sitting around the writers room congratulating themselves on this intricate story line. Meanwhile, they have created a mess of characters and plots that are beyond comprehension. We still don't know who or what was hacking Jamie's computer in the first episode. Delavanne shows up whenever the story calls for a "character with authority" regardless if its RG, French intelligence, the US government or to rescue Frenchy Bug-Eyes. What happened to the information accessed in the computer hack of RG's files done from Frenchy's apartment?

 

The logic behind The Cure is unintelligible. If the cute little leopard is critical to the success of The Cure, then entrusting him to Jamie is not a smart move. I assume that they plan on mass producing it once they get back to the US. Then they can hire crop dusters to spray it across the every corner of the globe. Or Mitch can run around squirting it into the mouth of every creature on earth.

 

Here's a question: are the large fish and aquatic mammals affected? I would love to see sharks, swordfish, whales and dolphins coming ashore to join in the fun.

[Free]

I've set the bar so low for this shitshow, that I was actually somewhat entertained last night.

 

It's because there were more animal attacks, those are usually entertaining, otherwise it's fodders getting killed off, Mother Cell nonsense, or Raiden evil corp. bs.

[TeapotDiva]

During the scene where Alves tells Chloe that he's going to have her sister tortured, and he calls his operative and the sister, everyone was talking in French and there were English-language subtitles on the screen.  So, of course, CBS put a huge banner promoting the "Late Show With Stephen Colbert" *over* the subtitles!  One of the few things on the show that can be directly explained ~ "What are the French people saying?" ~ and CBS blocks it out!  Hopeless.

[Tara Ariano]

In case you missed it, here's the Previously.TV post on the episode!

 

Ain't No Cure For The Summertime Zoo! / Can the Zoo Croo go to a place to find a thing, then make a thing and save the world? Let's call it a strong maybe!

I fast forwarded through most of this, but the SEASON FINALE?

 

It's not. That's next week.

[ennui]

I agree.  I was raised that this way is always wrongs.  No comma if the panda eats bamboo.  There is another comma if the panda has a semi-automatic.

That's the whole point! I guess you haven't read the book. It's funny.

Pandas eat shoots and leaves. Adding a comma changes everything.

Never mind.

[Free]

I fast forwarded through most of this, but the SEASON FINALE? Really, show, really? It's under the dome, but with dangerous Brentwood kitties. Which btw, I'm still waiting to see.

 

It depends on how much worse it gets, Under the Dome set new lows in that regard, so there's always a possibility for this series.

[redfish]

Well at least the leopard kitten was cute.

[PrincessMiMi]

I really can't decide which makes me madder : Jamie opening the door, seeing a leopard, and jumping BACK, instead of throwing her weight against the door to keep leopard OUT

 

OR

 

Trying to pass off a serval as a leopard cub. 

 

I think either one qualifies as a contendant for the  "Stupidest Moment in Zoo"  award. 

[Clanstarling]

Two hours in a row is just too much stupid. I felt my IQ dip a few points. Although I don't love the show (but come for the forums), this double-header almost made me stop watching and give it up. But, it's like a bag of chips - I just can't stop even though I want to.

 

So many stupid things already called out - here's another. Chloe's an "intelligence" agent, she's been with the crew for most of the project, she was the lead of the crew. Genetics, mutations, etc., were all discussed in her presence. But she couldn't handle the question about the mutation. I could have spouted the fake science just from watching the show. And when discussing transmission vectors, she couldn't say "Hey, Reiden's got this thing called a mother cell, and I've got their head of security right here to tell you I'm telling the truth."

 

Also - she's walking around and going to symposiums in the open. What happened to her being on the wanted list?
 

 

Senior FBI Guy/Dater gets added to the long list of characters introduced for no long-term purpose and then killed off. Same with Dead FBI Guy #12. And Wolf Manson, Ray and the bug-eyed guy in the woods. These characters were presumably added to offer some element of intrigue but none of it amounts to anything. Why did we need to see Senior FBI Guy on a blind date? What happened to Ray's female counterpart that Frenchy pushed out of the plane? 

The sad part is, some of those one (or two) and done characters were more interesting than the zoo crew. Senior Dater's rage and sad confession (he only had one friend, dammit, and you killed him!), #12 - though to be fair, I just like watching him, but how he was co-opted could be interesting.

 

I know James Wok is the lead male character but he just doesn't do it for me.  I'd like to see Mitch and Abe get another, much better show together.

James Wolk is much more enticing in other roles, I'm not sure whether his heart is in this one. But mileage varies on hotness. Love the idea of the Mitch and Abe show - Snark and Sensible, Animal Experts.

 

I realise they were leaving from Zimbabwe, where maybe it is common to put your pet leopard into a duffle bag and board a plane.  But how on earth were they going to get the leopard into the U.S.?  Did Chloe contact them and tell them Amelia Bedelia was giving them some sort of special "You May Skip Customs" pass?

If they'd been on a military transport (as they should have been), they could have. But for some odd reason, a military plane was a bridge too far for the production team.

 

During the scene where Alves tells Chloe that he's going to have her sister tortured, and he calls his operative and the sister, everyone was talking in French and there were English-language subtitles on the screen.  So, of course, CBS put a huge banner promoting the "Late Show With Stephen Colbert" *over* the subtitles!  One of the few things on the show that can be directly explained ~ "What are the French people saying?" ~ and CBS blocks it out!  Hopeless.

That ticked me off too! I hate those banners on general principle, but the timing was obnoxious.

[Free]

So many stupid things already called out - here's another. Chloe's an "intelligence" agent, she's been with the crew for most of the project, she was the lead of the crew. Genetics, mutations, etc., were all discussed in her presence. But she couldn't handle the question about the mutation. I could have spouted the fake science just from watching the show. And when discussing transmission vectors, she couldn't say "Hey, Reiden's got this thing called a mother cell, and I've got their head of security right here to tell you I'm telling the truth."

Also - she's walking around and going to symposiums in the open. What happened to her being on the wanted list?

 

But she was complimented on being 'qualified' to do this and then whined about them not believing her.  XD.

[maczero]

And she wonders why they won't believe her.

To be fair, she asked Delavene why she should speak and he gave her some BS about her "looking this thing in the eye".  Without any evidence, I'm not sure even Mitch would've been able to sound any less like a nutcase.

 

Mama Serval: What do you mean, some humans stole my baby? Why THE HELL would humans steal my baby?!

Vulture: Look, I'm telling you the truth.  I saw two of 'em stompin' around, talking 'bout needin' to get ahold of a leopard. Then one of 'em spotted your kid in the bushes, got all happy and grabbed him. Then they just took off.

Mama Serval: My baby IS. NOT. A. LEOPARD.

Vulture: Well, you know that.  And I know that.  But I guess small spotted cubs all look the same to humans.  Well, unless the humans are, I dunno, a safari guide or a wildlife conservationist or a veterinary forensic scientist....

Thank you!  I knew that wasn't a leopard cub.  It was way to sleek looking and had a stripe pattern along its back.

On a Shallow Note Chloe is a very attractive woman especially in the grey dress. 

Yes she is.  Speaking of looks, I'm surprised that they cast a plain looking woman to play Jaime.  She's not ugly by any stretch of the imagination but by Hollywood standards she doesn't make it to cute.  That's not a bad thing.  It's just that I've become so accustomed to every twenty something female on television being hot.

 

 

I'm confused as to exactly what "The Cure" is.  Mitch drew some stuff out of the mother cell, mixed it up with some other stuff in the velociraptor, then eventually orally put it into that dog?  Then what?  He had a soldier return the dog to the owner.  How did "The Cure" get from the dog to the leopard cub?  Osmosis?  Pheromones?  "They're communicating with each other"???  Does it just emanate in the air?  I'm not exactly sure what it is supposed to do.  Are they trying to bring the leopard back home so they can draw out "The Cure" and mass produce it?  Then what?  How is it supposed to get to all of the world's animals?

You've got a lot of questions here and honestly I can't answer most of them.  However, I do know that the leopard cub is part of the cure.  I believe the cub's stem cells were used in conjunction with the mother cell to come up with the cure which they then administered to the dog.  How they expect to administer it worldwide?  You got me.

I assumed that they had to go from Zambia to Harare, Zimbabwe because 1) they needed a hospital and 2) they needed a big city with an airport that could get them back home.

Speaking of Harare, the suburbs of this African city look a lot like rural Louisiana.

 

I mean, if they had slept in the car and peed in bottles, what fun would that be?! 

That's how I camp.  Never understood wanting to sleep on the ground and using the bathroom in the bushes.

Edited September 10, 2015 by maczero

[Free]

To be fair, she said she asked Delavene why she should speak and he gave her some BS about her "looking this thing in the eye".  Without any evidence, I'm not sure even Mitch would've been able to sound any less like a nutcase.

 

All the more reason it was foolish to think this ridiculous story would be believeable.

[Clanstarling]

 However, I do know that the leopard cub is part of the cure.  I believe the cub's stem cells were used in conjunction with the mother cell to come up with the cure which they then administered to the dog.  

They said that the faux leopard cub was important at least three times - it is a special snowflake whose specialness may well be forgotten by the next episode, given the track record of the show.

 

In the first of the two episodes, when Abe noticed Wolk was worrying about "her," I foolishly thought, given that he was in Africa, that the "her" in question was his mom. Silly me.

 

Mitch telling Jaime that she "saved" him (by giving him the feels, I guess) made me throw up a little in the back of my mouth. None of the "couples" on the show have anything resembling chemistry (much like the science of the show). But for some reason, Mitch and Jaime, maybe because of the age difference, maybe because of the slapped on "romance", seem particularly ick worthy.

 

Was it just me, or did the "mother cell" seem to melt when sprayed with water...maybe it was taken from the Wicked Witch of the West.

Edited September 10, 2015 by clanstarling

[Free]

Was it just me, or did the "mother cell" seem to melt when sprayed with water...maybe it was taken from the Wicked Witch of the West.

 

If their weakness really is water, this is going to give me bad Signs ending flashbacks all over again.

[Netfoot]

Tell you who I'm sorry for -- that 'leopard' cub!  It will be reduced to sucking soup through a straw by the time they've made up enough serum to cure a litter of puppies!

[Sandman]

If their weakness really is water, this is going to give me bad Signs ending flashbacks all over again.

 

Imagine how the Witch feels! "Screw you, Shyamalan! And you, too, Zoo Croo! 'I'm the hitch, I'm what no one believes, I'm the Witch!'"

[MissLucas]

Well, according to the promo the 'cure is lost' - so it's bye-bye little serval impostor, hello season 2 *head-desk*

Edited September 11, 2015 by MissLucas

[Free]

Well, according to the promo the 'cure is lost' - so it's bye-bye little serval impostor, hello season 2 *head-desk*

 

I thought so, they were going to need something to carry over into next season.

[blackwing]

I'm assuming there is going to be a next season, since ratings were supposedly high.  I truly hope they read message boards and make things better.  More animal attacks.  Less Irritating Flinty Voiced Reporter.  I don't think anyone gives two shits about her budding "romance" with Acerbic Mitch.  Therefore.... season premiere next summer, a dolphin eats her.

[crowswork]

Imposter cat has the same problems that the so-called wolves in movies that are really German shepherds or huskies. They pick these because are easier to handle I imagine a leopard cub tiny enough to carry around in a bag might be too fragile to deal with. In one large enough to be safely handled might not be safely handled.

I don't mind the romances but they could use more animals.  And the writing could be better.

[English Teacher]

I want a baby serval. It was adorable.

As for this train wreck on which an airplane crash landed upon which a pterodactyl flew overhead and pooped on, I stopped about 1 hour in. I'm going to read the more entertaining summaries of you fine folks and spare myself the migraine I know this will cause.

...and I did not think anything the writers did would /could be worse or less realistic than the book.

Go Team Animals.

[Sandman]

Did the showrunners intend that the audience should root for the animals over humanity? It hardly seems likely, but the sheer idiocy of the humans makes any other reaction almost impossible.

[shapeshifter]

Did the showrunners intend that the audience should root for the animals over humanity? It hardly seems likely, but the sheer idiocy of the humans makes any other reaction almost impossible.

Maybe not in every scene, but overall, I'd say yes, we are supposed to root for the animals because it was humans (Reiden ) who cause the animals to go postal.

[raven]

Finally got around to watching, needed more wine.

 

So - wow.  Two hours in one sitting is a lot!  So much nonsense.

 

What was the point of FBI agent XB?  Why was he musing about his wife and Paris and then threatening to drop Chloe in a ditch (WHY??) was the man insane?  Will that woman he was dating wonder now why he never returns her calls, since he was shot in the head and all.  What is it with this show and secondary characters who show up, do some stuff that doesn't amount to anything really and get killed?

 

All the shells around the dead guards in Zambia – where are the leopard bodies??  Ray said all the ammo was used, can the leopards dodge bullets now?  Or were those guys just the worst shots ever?

 

Aw, I was kind of liking Ray :( RIP and to Alphas too.  Couldn’t have the pretty compete with James Wolk.  Plus damn could he set up a tent!  And at least brought up “uh…how do we plan on distributing the cure to all animals, everywhere?”  Good question, for that you have to die on this show.

 

Oh it’s that guy who recruited everyone!  Time for some torture.  Wow Chloe hung in their pretty well; not so sure about her sister though.  Wonder what her sister will think?  Does torture amount to evensies for fiance stealing?  Took Chloe a long time of watching her sister tortured to, you know, make something up.

 

Love the visual of the dead bodies chilling in the tree.  Now THAT’S what we needed!

I could listen to Abe sing around a campfire for a long time. Very nice.

 

Jamie hit about 8million on the annoy-o-meter tonight.  There are killer leopards around, but I must pee in private!  OMG that was hilarious.  Why is she here??  LOL.  Can’t pee if I can see people, but killer leopards no problem. 

 

The leopard attack was hilarious plus they all just blew off Ray being killed.  OK the eulogy in car was also pretty funny.  THIS SHOW.
At least Abe pointed out that they had NO PLAN.  You get on, Abe.

 

Fake baby leopard cutest thing ever!  Why didn’t they drive THROUGH the river?  Looking at the collapsed bridge/whatever, it didn’t look that deep, and their Land Rover-y type vehicle looked to have the whatever you call it – not a periscope – on it. I bet Netfoot knows what it’s called.  The better question is, why am I asking this?

YAY for animals taking over the hospital!  Alligators in the parking lot!!  Fabulous.  I guess whoever’s in charge of a hospital with sick and injured patients took door closing lessons from the prison guys.

Damn Chloe was biting off words in her presentation.  An ENVIRONMENTAL. EVENT. of GLOBAL.PROPORTIONS. is HAPPENING.  I could see “ !!!111!!!” after it. 

 

A+ for shot of James Wolk’s chest.  Wow so he had surgery to the stomach and could still save two apparently healthy kids by wheeling them around even though they were pretty capable of walking.  And then a third who couldn’t!  How long did he live in Africa btw?  He can’t speak any of the local dialects?  Doesn’t understand a word? Jeez.

 

“It is a terrible world where a man has to shoot his own dog” Aw.  I get it dude.  You’re on a terrible show!

 

Mitch learned a lot from Jamie?  Like how to screw up at almost every opportunity?  Then she screws up again! And they lose the mothercell!  Oops.    Show, stop trying with the romance. What was the talk about Jamie’s mother about?  I don’t remember anything about that.  NM, don’t really care.  Just go with the Scooby Doo dynamics OK?

 

Chloe borrowed someone’s phone?  Whose?  I wouldn’t let someone walk out of sight with my phone.  Did they get it back?  Why am I worrying about this?

Look out Mitch – the last guy Jamie kissed got shot four times (by her!)

 

O hahahaha!!  Plane attack!

Next week - the final battle!!!  Damn right, that baby not-leopard better make it out alive.

Edited September 12, 2015 by raven

[ottoDbusdriver]

YAY for animals taking over the hospital!  Alligators in the parking lot!!  Fabulous.

 

Only problem -- there are no alligators in Zambia, only crocs.  So unless these alligators escaped from the local Harare zoo, they shouldn't have been there.  The producers probably figured that since they film this in Louisiana alligators were close enough.  Kind of like the serval kitten being passed off as a leopard cub.

[raven]

Maybe they were supposed to be crocs.  Can't tell the snout shape too well.

 

But this is Zoo - I don't expect any reality or actual facts at this point.

[ratgirlagogo]

There is always darkness before the dawn.  This will all be over soon.  Till next Tuesday!

[Netfoot]

Snorkel.

[raven]

Thank you!

[Free]

Only problem -- there are no alligators in Zambia, only crocs.  So unless these alligators escaped from the local Harare zoo, they shouldn't have been there.  The producers probably figured that since they film this in Louisiana alligators were close enough.  Kind of like the serval kitten being passed off as a leopard cub.

 

Must've been hard for them, they can't even get simply geography correct on this series.

[Andyourlittledog2]

Oh dear gawd.  This show.

 

So, let me get this straight.  They are out in the middle of pretty much no where at a camp/outpost overrun by murderous leopards and find several mutilated bodies in the open camp structure.  And an old fashioned dial er up TV with rabbit ears extended and apparently already on and receiving a broadcast from a US basic cable television station such as CNN which just happens to be discussing 'what's wrong with the animals'.  Okay, sure. That could totally happen.  Sure it could.  I mean, Verizon FIOS probably cabled that whole jungle right up.  No problemo.  

 

The only exposure I have to leopard cubs is when they'd visit the Tonight Show and even I know that they have leopard ears not kitty ears. I didn't know until I came to the thread that it was a serval, but I knew absolutely that that was no leopard.  

 

So major abdominal surgery to remove a bullet (and they say gutshot is the worst for damage and infection, very dangerous and painful) but barely awake from anesthesia our hero is lifting and pushing and pulling and carrying and in general moving freely about his life.  All righty then. 

 

Frenchy lost her accent about fifty percent of this episode.  I'm beginning to think the actress doesn't really care any more. Can you blame her?  

 

Girl reporter was more childish, stupid, and pouty than usual even for her.  It's like the director told her she skewed too old for this part so act 

more youthful and she came up with petulant six year old in response.  She looks most of the time like Shirley Temple in her early movies when she was pouty or angry -- all pushed out lower lip and exaggerated frowny face..  'Golly gee Mister, I wanted a ride on the pony too!'  

[MissLucas]

So major abdominal surgery to remove a bullet (and they say gutshot is the worst for damage and infection, very dangerous and painful) but barely awake from anesthesia our hero is lifting and pushing and pulling and carrying and in general moving freely about his life.  All righty then. 

He'll also survive a plane crash and swimming in some less than sanitary looking water. Clearly Jackson Oz is the guy to out-Wolverine (it's a word!) H50's McGarrett who's managed similar feats of amazing healing.

Edited September 14, 2015 by MissLucas