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S04.E20: Brittany & Bryon

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A single mom wants to know whether the Marine she fell for online is everything he claims to be.

 

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You know, some of these codfish make it really hard to feel sorry for them, & Brittany was definitely one of them. How stupid is she? Even if everything was true, (& how could she possibly believe all that?) she has 3 kids, do you really think bringing a marine with severe PTSD into their lives is acceptable? I'm glad the fathers stopped her from putting the kids on the show too, at least someone else is looking out for them. When they showed her friend Renee, I thought for sure it was going to end up being her, but I guess she was just there to tell us about Brittany's bad judgement. When she was whining about how she just wanted to take care of Bryon, I could feel my blood pressure rise. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

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And all these cute butches need to leave whatever stupid place they live, and move to my neighborhood. Heather would be in hot demand in the community I live in. Don't lie! Don't waste your time on straight women who don't want you! Move to any of a dozen awesome places where you will be treasured.

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I was so busy being amazed by Brittany's stupidity that I forgot about Heather. She wants to be a cop? Gee, do you think appearing on Catfish & letting everyone see how you scammed someone is going to help you reach your goal? I would be seriously worried about any police force that would hire her, lying & stealing other people's identities aren't usually considered to be good qualities for a cop.

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I know it's very hard to uproot yourself and move, but if you're REALLY not accepted- even by your family- I don't understand the motivation to stay.  A lot of Catfish (and, people in general) whine about not being accepted and how hard it is but they STAY!!!  There are many, many other places to move.  I know it'll be hard, but after awhile I think it would be better. 

 

My question is, how did Brittany EVER think that was a man's voice?  When Nev and Max asked her how it was different than the picture she just said Southern.  How about FEMALE?!?  Or, maybe even a younger boy?  Heather probably thought that on some level knew if she just used her normal speaking voice on the phone.

 

I don't approve of ANY of the Catfishers' lying, etc, but some I don't loath with the fire of a thousand sun's and Heather is firmly in that group.  Yes, it was wrong, but I don't feel what she did was as bad as some of the others.  I just think Brittany was desperate and dumb.

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I've been married to a military member for over 10 years now, and while there is still plenty that I don't understand about the military, I do know one thing for sure. If you EVER run into someone and they tell you pretty openly that they are a sniper or special forces, they are LYING. Those people do not brag about their jobs, put pictures of themselves actually sniping on social media, and information that others get from them is on a need to know basis. As soon as they said that he was a Marine Corps sniper I knew that this was a bunch of crap. 

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I am a super compassionate person, but I couldn't feel sorry for Brittany, mainly because of the very kids she kept whining about. Each and every time she whined at Heather/"Bryon" that she went too far for bringing her (Brittany's) kids into it, I said out loud, "No! YOU went too far! They are YOUR kids!"   If she is angry about the kids getting involved, she needs to be angry at herself. How irresponsible that she would do that without ever having met this person! Geez!!

 

She practically said that she can't be alone because she's used to being with somebody. OK, now tell me how you're **that** lonely with 3 kids??!!  I get needing adult/romantic companionship, but I don't get being desperate for anything, so much so that you'll delude yourself and drag your kids into the delusion.

 

Why don't these lonely mothers use that time to be good mothers to their kids, or educate themselves, work, do family stuff, yoga, volunteer, hang with friends, etc, or the million other things that don't involve delusions, broken hearts, and humiliation? 

 

And as others have said-- the voice ... how could she not tell? It's so obviously not a man's voice! 

 

Sorry, but this is one of those times where I was more pissed at the so-called victim than the Catfish. 

 

 

 

**edited for additional content and typos, bc I know the difference between "you're" and "your"  ;)

Edited by Scorpiosunshine
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Those people do not brag about their jobs, put pictures of themselves actually sniping on social media, and information that others get from them is on a need to know basis. As soon as they said that he was a Marine Corps sniper I knew that this was a bunch of crap. 

And it's always a Marine with these phonies. Never one of the other services.

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I did find it pretty distasteful that Heather found it necessary to pretend she has PTSD just to continue her lie.  It's pretty offensive to those soldiers who are actually suffering. 

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A divorced stay at home mom with 3 kids?? How does that work?

No judgement about stay at home moms but I can't imagine that's doable unless you were once married to a millionaire. 

 

That was the lamest season finale ever. 

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I am a super compassionate person, but I couldn't feel sorry for Brittany, mainly because of the very kids she kept whining about. Each and every time she whined at Heather/"Bryon" that she went too far for bringing her (Brittany's) kids into it, I said out loud, "No! YOU went too far! They are YOUR kids!"   If she is angry about the kids getting involved, she needs to be angry at herself. How irresponsible that she would do that without ever having met this person! Geez!!

 

She practically said that she can't be alone because she's used to being with somebody. OK, now tell me how you're **that** lonely with 3 kids??!!  I get needing adult/romantic companionship, but I don't get being desperate for anything, so much so that you'll delude yourself and drag your kids into the delusion.

 

Why don't these lonely mothers use that time to be good mothers to their kids, or educate themselves, work, do family stuff, yoga, volunteer, hang with friends, etc, or the million other things that don't involve delusions, broken hearts, and humiliation? 

 

And as others have said-- the voice ... how could she not tell? It's so obviously not a man's voice! 

 

Sorry, but this is one of those times where I was more pissed at the so-called victim than the Catfish. 

 

 

 

I agree with every word of this. I, too, was yelling at my TV--"don't you dare blame her! YOU dragged your kids into this!". And she was texting/talking with this person when she should have been taking care of them, at least sometimes. She said they talked for hours, and her daughter asked who she was talking to. I am NOT old fashioned and I don't think women should sacrifice their own lives on the altar of their children, but honey, you had 3, you have to spend some time raising them and not chasing a new boyfriend. Jesus.

 

I suppose all these average/pleasant looking people want to believe that they can win a hot model with their wonderful personalities? so much so that they'll live with any delusion? She was almost as dense as the nursing student from Arkansas who fell for the "model" who was studying to be an anesthesiologist online, when he wasn't a writer on the Chelsea Handler show. Ye gods.

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Agree with everyone about Brittany's parenting. I'm curious: was that her house? how does she afford such a nice huge house with 3 little kids/no job and single. She did have a supportive friend she could hang out with so it's not like she's all alone in a shed somewhere to warrant such desperation and "fast tracking" of ever man (she thinks) she met online.

 

I believe this is the first Catfish where I saw Max or Nev bluntly tell the catfishee to their face: wide gap in physical attractiveness + potential for online lying=get a grip you're being played. 

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I agree DiabLOL, I hadn't noticed them saying that before about the difference in the physical attractiveness b/t the two.

 

I just have no patience for these types of catfishee.  As a gay man I know where I stand in the 10-scale level of attractiveness; you know what is acceptable in your range to go after and who might have an interest you.  This girl should have known that the guy was way out of her league.  Why would that hottie want a woman who has three kids w/ multiple fathers?  I felt bad she was that hurt, but she should have known she was being played.

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As a gay man I know where I stand in the 10-scale level of attractiveness; you know what is acceptable in your range to go after and who might have an interest you.  This girl should have known that the guy was way out of her league.  Why would that hottie want a woman who has three kids w/ multiple fathers?  I felt bad she was that hurt, but she should have known she was being played.

 

I think these are actually two different issues.  I'm not a big fan of the "you should know your place, and someone who looks like that would never be interested in you" argument.  I think attractiveness is very subjective, and relationships don't really survive when they are reduced to that basic a level, unless perhaps all you want is a one night stand.  However, I would agree that it seems doubtful that anyone would want to get involved in Brittany's drama, not because they are a "hottie," but because she seems like a mess.       

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You know, some of these codfish make it really hard to feel sorry for them, & Brittany was definitely one of them. How stupid is she? Even if everything was true, (& how could she possibly believe all that?) she has 3 kids, do you really think bringing a marine with severe PTSD into their lives is acceptable? I'm glad the fathers stopped her from putting the kids on the show too, at least someone else is looking out for them. When they showed her friend Renee, I thought for sure it was going to end up being her, but I guess she was just there to tell us about Brittany's bad judgement. When she was whining about how she just wanted to take care of Bryon, I could feel my blood pressure rise. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

 

This is SO on the money.  I just watched the episode.  Brittany was STUPID to the nth degree.  I think Nev though she was delusional as well when he basically told her that he was certain she was NOT talking to the guy in the picture.  I don't think Nev was being mean but Brittany was an average looking single mother of three children, while Bryon was a hot, single Marine.  My question is, had Bryon been exactly what he said he was but wasn't as attractive, would Brittany be interested in him.  I don't get a single mother of three young children wanting to get involved with a man who admits to having PTSD.  What would the fathers of the children have thought of that?  

 

I think we, in this society need to change our language.  First of all, you don't "meet" someone on Facebook/Instagram/Twitter/Tumblr; you connect with them, but IMO you don't actually meet until you see each other face to face, or at least video chat.  Second, you don't "date" someone unless you actually go out with them on a real date, dating isn't spending hours on Facebook, and IMO you don't have a "relationship" with someone unless you have at least seen that person in the flesh.  

 

Is it against the law to take pictures off someone's Facebook page and create a page for yourself?  I've often wondered about that.  

 

I have another question, why are people so concerned about these folks' financial situations?  She's a stay at home mom of three, okay.  The only financial situation I care about is my own.  

Edited by Neurochick
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I think we, in this society need to change our language.  First of all, you don't "meet" someone on Facebook/Instagram/Twitter/Tumblr; you connect with them, but IMO you don't actually meet until you see each other face to face, or at least video chat.  Second, you don't "date" someone unless you actually go out with them on a real date, dating isn't spending hours on Facebook, and IMO you don't have a "relationship" with someone unless you have at least seen that person in the flesh.  

Thisssssssssss.  A MILLION times, this!

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A divorced stay at home mom with 3 kids?? How does that work?

No judgement about stay at home moms but I can't imagine that's doable unless you were once married to a millionaire. 

 

That was the lamest season finale ever. 

 

She probably lives with her parents or possibly with the parents of one of her ex's.  That would be a pretty nice kitchen, even for an employed 24 year old with no kids to support.  

 

The majority of the Catfished appear to have Special-Snowflake-itis.  Of COURSE the hot marine with the 8 pack would pick a solid "3" out of the millions of "4's" through "10's" on Facebook to begin a torrid online affair with!  

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Max and Nev go back over to Brittany's, apparently interrupting a maxi-dress party she had thrown for herself and her cousin Renee.

 

Huge LOL at the above quote from the recap.

 

This is one of the few episodes where I feel like the codfish actually DESERVED to be catfished in such an "outrageous" way (by an overweight. gay. woman). Something about Brittany's demeanor made me very uneasy. The manic way she'd answer Nev's phone calls, the bearing down and furring of the brow when she was going to be "brave," the sanctimonious lectures about being yourself and not being ashamed to be gay. She struck me as extremely unstable, basically a Crazy Bitch, and the father(s) of her children probably ran for the hills as fast as possible. It scares me that she cares for three innocent children. Luckily, Renee seemed to be much more grounded in reality, so hopefully she has a heavy hand in Brittany's children's upbringing.

 

The episode provided some LOL moments for me (which is rare for "Catfish" for me): 

 

- When Nev and Max flat-out told Brittany that Bryon was clearly out of her league

- When Brittany demanded to know if anyone else would "Come the FUCK outside"

 

This made me sad:

 

- When Heather said she was made fun of for being a lesbian..."before I even knew I was a lesbian." (As a gay man I can relate to this)

 

Not sad to hear Catfish hasn't been picked up for another season. This show has run its course. They made it to 100 episodes, so it'll likely be put into syndication (I always think it's so tacky when shows celebrate 100 episodes....it's like, um congrats to you guys for getting royalties for the rest of your life?), though that is not nearly as lucrative as it was in the past. I'm curious what Nev's next step will be. I could see him hosting a tragic MTV talk show or something.

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FWIW, I knew many good-looking ripped-abs Marines with Plain Jane and/or heavyset girlfriends and wives. I know plenty of in-shape good-looking guys now out of the USMC with Plain Jane and/or heavyset girlfriends and wives.  I didn't like this idea Nev seemed to have about him not realistically being into her because of her looks. 

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FWIW, I knew many good-looking ripped-abs Marines with Plain Jane and/or heavyset girlfriends and wives. I know plenty of in-shape good-looking guys now out of the USMC with Plain Jane and/or heavyset girlfriends and wives.  I didn't like this idea Nev seemed to have about him not realistically being into her because of her looks. 

 

Yes, but I bet most of those couples didn't meet on the Internet, and if they did, they at least at Face Time before meeting.  

 

I think Nev said that to Brittany not because "Bryon" was good looking a ripped but because "Bryon" was good looking, ripped, didn't even want to give Brittany his phone number and had never "face timed" with her.  

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She must be so pitty and crotchy right now.

Comments like this keep me coming back. Also, stupidest fucking victim ever if she watched 40 episodes and couldn't do a single reverse image search.

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Yes, but I bet most of those couples didn't meet on the Internet, and if they did, they at least at Face Time before meeting.

 

I think the point is less about how they met, and more that people are attracted to all different sorts, i.e. a conventionally good looking person may be attracted to someone who is not conventionally attractive.  I thought Nev was essentially saying that "Bryon" was too good looking to want someone like Brittnay. 

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As a gay man I know where I stand in the 10-scale level of attractiveness; you know what is acceptable in your range to go after and who might have an interest you.

Smart straight people usually know this two. In my single days, I would occasionally punch above my weight, and sometimes it would work (hello, dude who looked like Bradley Cooper). But I always, ALWAYS knew when I was being played. Ugly people usually don't live in bubbles. We know we're ugly. That sort of self-awareness is what keeps us from getting hurt.

too, not two. How do you edit this thing?

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Also, stupidest fucking victim ever if she watched 40 episodes and couldn't do a single reverse image search.

 

Or a Google search to realize there are no US Marine Corps installations in Indiana. 

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Usually I wish that the show would pay for a few sessions of therapy for everyone involved in each episode, but I've been marathoning Drunk History (I can't believe how much I love this show), so I've been musing about how Catfish would be if they got the main players really drunk. Which would be terribly irresponsible (Drunk History makes their narrators get physicals before getting drunk, doesn't leave them with any alcohol, films them in their abodes and does not let them drive, and they have medics on hand, all this to try and make a safe and entertaining show). I don't know...maybe try an episode where the catfish and the catfishee get high (come to Colorado), or use shrooms? I'm just musing, this show needs to end, and it would be so dangerous to alter the states of these people. 

Edited by Cosmic Muffin
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I found this article about the show. It's quite interesting and gives some background information about all the steps involved with each "catfishing" case.

 

It's dated from May 2014, but it looks like they do provide therapy with each case.

 

MTV sends therapists to meet with everyone after production wraps.

Sociopaths or not, everyone who appears on the show, as Joseph told us, speaks with a therapist after filming is over. “We want to make sure that a professional is there in case the person needs it,” Eisen said. “Fortunately we haven't had any issues after the show has aired, but we need to make sure that people are taken care of if they need to be.”

Edited by CMH1981
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Those garments should be in a hotel laundry bag in a closed drawer until she's ready to pack up again and leave, not on her showered body.

 

YES. Oh god, yes. Eeeeesh.

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I found this article about the show. It's quite interesting and gives some background information about all the steps involved with each "catfishing" case.

 

It's dated from May 2014, but it looks like they do provide therapy with each case.

 

Thanks, CMH1981, that's really good to know.  This makes me think the y might be more responsible than I thought they were.

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Looks aren't everything but it's not like she had anything going for her outside of looks. Unemployed, overweight, with 3 kids with different dads...

 

Yet she really thought she was getting a Bradley Cooper marine sniper to the point where she dragged her kids into it?

 

Sorry but that's just delusional. 

Edited by EDTV
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I had no problems with Brittany's appearance. And besides that, she was thinking of herself as nurturing, kind, and patient-- and a person with PTSD isn't necessarily a trouble free ride, either. "Earth mother meets wounded warrior" is not the least plausible fantasy we've seen on this show, not by a longshot.

 

I'm not defending her willfully looking the other way over the obvious red flags, but I don't think she was a heinous evil person who couldn't be desired by anyone but another heinous monster, either.

 

I mean no disrepect to anyone with PTSD, believe me. But I think that it levels the field a bit, to compare a person who may be physically fit but have problems in other areas, with a person who is less glam, but possibly a nurturer.

 

I know we don't really know how great of a nurturer Brittany is, and I have my doubts so I'm not saying she passes that test. But based on the stories they were telling about themselves, I can see her thinking she would be patient with a person who needed that, and that making it more plausible to her that she'd attract someone who was "out of her league" in other ways.

 

One thing I liked about her is that she dressed well for her body and did not try to stuff herself into clothes that were too small, like so many of us fatties try to do, thinking somehow that delusionally it makes you smaller to wear a smaller size. She looked comfortable enough in her body, and I don't think she'd have trouble attracting someone, based solely on her looks.

 

Also, the irony of it is that, when you get to the reality of it, the real Heather was actually a pretty good match for Brittany in terms of appearance and who's in whose league. It was just that she lied and wasn't the gender Brittany wanted. But this wasn't a case like others we've seen, where there's a hottie and a nottie.

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I mean no disrepect to anyone with PTSD, believe me. But I think that it levels the field a bit, to compare a person who may be physically fit but have problems in other areas, with a person who is less glam, but possibly a nurturer.

 

As someone with some experience with PTSD, I agree.  I would also add that everyone has flaws (not just those who are homely-looking or those who are kept awake at night by combat experience) and luckily there are no set "attractiveness scores" where someone with any given flaw is only worth X points and can only qualify for the lower 25th percentile quality of partner. 

 

And if I had a dollar for every good-looking Marine whose nothing-special-to-look-at wives found a new boyfriend and cleaned out their Marine's bank accounts while they were overseas, I'd have a lot of dollars.

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One of the things that seems to be true across a lot of the stories on this show, is that people are looking for someone they can open up to and be heard and responded to in a caring way. To me that is a very plausible way to connect with someone, and transcends their looks. That apparently it's hard for the people involved (both the traditionally attractive and the less glam participants) to find anyone to do this with in reality is depressing. That the rapport established based on real talk about deep stuff is only possible when looks are not on the table, or when a fabricated story of some sort is used, just seems so crazy to me. And so so sad. I get that once someone lies to you, you can't trust them anymore. I sure wouldn't. But not all "hot" people are at all decent in the personality department, and I think the desire to have someone who's both is understandable, but the degree to which first impressions seem to rule makes me think maybe a lot of the people on the show are getting what they deserve-- live by superficial qualifications, don't consider anything else, and don't do your homework? Your living in a fog leads you into your confusion. I don't condone lying, but I also think it reflects back on you if you are only capable of trying with someone who fits your fantasy ideal and you don't live in the real world, and your pursuit of only the most superficial qualities is paramount when looking for a mate.

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One of the things that seems to be true across a lot of the stories on this show, is that people are looking for someone they can open up to and be heard and responded to in a caring way. To me that is a very plausible way to connect with someone, and transcends their looks. That apparently it's hard for the people involved (both the traditionally attractive and the less glam participants) to find anyone to do this with in reality is depressing. That the rapport established based on real talk about deep stuff is only possible when looks are not on the table, or when a fabricated story of some sort is used, just seems so crazy to me. And so so sad. I get that once someone lies to you, you can't trust them anymore. I sure wouldn't. But not all "hot" people are at all decent in the personality department, and I think the desire to have someone who's both is understandable, but the degree to which first impressions seem to rule makes me think maybe a lot of the people on the show are getting what they deserve-- live by superficial qualifications, don't consider anything else, and don't do your homework? Your living in a fog leads you into your confusion. I don't condone lying, but I also think it reflects back on you if you are only capable of trying with someone who fits your fantasy ideal and you don't live in the real world, and your pursuit of only the most superficial qualities is paramount when looking for a mate.

 

So many of these people say they have no one to talk to, but in reality it's not that they can't find someone to talk to, it's that they can't find someone "hot enough" to talk to. If this show has shown us anything it's that there are many lonely people out there that want/need companionship, but they want it in a certain packaging. 

 

As much as we vilify the catfisher, I would love to see a show where the catfisher is actually HOTTER than the pics they used. I'm sure all the lies would be forgiven then by the catfishee.

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As much as we vilify the catfisher, I would love to see a show where the catfisher is actually HOTTER than the pics they used. I'm sure all the lies would be forgiven then by the catfishee.

 

Maybe they would, maybe they wouldn't.  I think the question then might be, "if you weren't trying to make yourself appear better by using fake pictures, then what was your purpose?  " 

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I've always wondered if you need a special program (software) to do the searches like Nev and Max do. For example some of those people finder sites or classmates you have to pay to get information.

 

Couldn't the person whose being cat fished do that search himself/herself?

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Agree with everyone about Brittany's parenting. I'm curious: was that her house? how does she afford such a nice huge house with 3 little kids/no job and single. She did have a supportive friend she could hang out with so it's not like she's all alone in a shed somewhere to warrant such desperation and "fast tracking" of ever man (she thinks) she met online.

 

I believe this is the first Catfish where I saw Max or Nev bluntly tell the catfishee to their face: wide gap in physical attractiveness + potential for online lying=get a grip you're being played. 

 

Yes, after like thousands of episodes where the unattractive man has a supermodel in love with him.  Never once a mention of that gap in physical attractiveness.

 

That being said, now that twenty-somethings are on to Catfish and will likely be faking stories to get on TV, will they ever move to the most common catfishing on the net? 40 plus year-old, paunchy married men pretending to be twenty-something, single, hot guys to twenty-something women, and vice versa? This is exactly what supposedly happened to Nev in the movie.

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 Not sad to hear Catfish hasn't been picked up for another season.

Nev tweeted yesterday that he was hitting the road to start filming Season 5.

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Not surprised it's been renewed. MTV is the quintessential network for beating a dead horse with their programming. The Real World is still on, for god's sake!

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I've been married to a military member for over 10 years now, and while there is still plenty that I don't understand about the military, I do know one thing for sure. If you EVER run into someone and they tell you pretty openly that they are a sniper or special forces, they are LYING. Those people do not brag about their jobs, put pictures of themselves actually sniping on social media, and information that others get from them is on a need to know basis. As soon as they said that he was a Marine Corps sniper I knew that this was a bunch of crap. 

 

Marine sniper was the famous rapper of this episode.

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FWIW, I knew many good-looking ripped-abs Marines with Plain Jane and/or heavyset girlfriends and wives. I know plenty of in-shape good-looking guys now out of the USMC with Plain Jane and/or heavyset girlfriends and wives.  I didn't like this idea Nev seemed to have about him not realistically being into her because of her looks. 

I remember going to my brothers homecoming from his first tour overseas.  

 

We spied a heavyset wife in the bleachers frenetically shaving her mustache with a BIC razor while her mother held a mirror.   

 

A lid for every pot.

Edited by RCharter
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I've always wondered if you need a special program (software) to do the searches like Nev and Max do. For example some of those people finder sites or classmates you have to pay to get information.

 

Couldn't the person whose being cat fished do that search himself/herself?

You don't. I used the free website Nev and Max use to search phone numbers. My name came up, along with my mom(same phone plan) and my mmothers address. It also knew how old I was.

Interwebs is scary.

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I remember going to my brothers homecoming from his first tour overseas.  

 

We spied a heavyset wife in the bleachers frenetically shaving her mustache with a BIC razor while her mother held a mirror.   

 

A lid for every pot.

 

Or a dependapotamus who let it all go to hell as soon as she got a ring on her finger.

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