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The Bastard Executioner - General Discussion


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I didn't know if was supposed to be Slavic. I thought she was just talking weird because she was a witch or whatever. It's not that good of an accent but it didn't really bother me that much because of that. 

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I'll continue to read here but I won't try to defend it.

 

Contribute anyway, I know I like to hear some good stuff people like.  Good conversations are not people all saying the same stuff!

 

As long as I get to taunt it cruelly.

 

I like to hear this too.

 

They ought to call this show "The Lazy Bastard Who's Supposed To Be Editing."

 

HAHAHAHAHAHA!

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I did it, I made it to episode three or four or whatever it is. I think that show is horrific. I have no idea what Sutter was thinking or smoking, but none of it was good. The plot and the dialogue are buffonish and childish.

 

My only comment about the actual plot is that the chamberlain is an unbelievable character. He is the chamberlain of a small Welsh hold to a minor British baron. He isn't Machiavelli or Cromwell with access to great power and a king.That a person with no title and lesser stature could manipulate and accumulate power or could get even a minor noble to pay attention to him is ridiculous. The Baron would had him arrested and cut off his head for killing his chamberlain. 

Edited by SimoneS
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Heh, I saw Ed Sheeran's name in the guest credits, and I remembered that he was suppose to appear in this.  I think he was the younger torturer.  To his credit, he handled the lines he was given well enough, but I still cracked up, because, come one.  It's Ed Sheeran.  Torturing someone.

 

If I cared more about this show, I'd have to rewatch it, because I honestly feel like I'm starting not to know half of the stuff is going on. So, there is some kind of religious group (lead by the king's top bishop or something?), that is hunting down and taking out some folks with markings on them?  And apparently Katey Segal's silly sounding witch has them too?  Yeah, I got nothing.

 

Meanwhile, The Baroness tries to meet the king, but he just hands her off to his number one, who is a dick about it, and is trying to split up her territories.  So, she's now claiming she's pregnant, because I guess that would not allow them to do it?  I guess the Baroness better find someone to get her a baby, stat!  I can think of at least two guys would be likely suitors, although I have the creepy sense one of them would be someone she'd really not like...

 

And then there is Corbett, who seems to be striking some deal with another Baron, about marrying the Baroness, combining their territories, and serving as their chamberlain.  It's like I'm watching a Game of Thrones episode, where I don't care about any of the players, and Vampire Bill has somehow become the Littlefinger in this game.

 

Poor lead dude.  When he isn't being forced to kill someone with a chicken bone because his friends got captured, he finds out his new wife apparently is abusing their son (?), because that how the original "father" did things.  It's tough out there for a bastard executioner!

 

I'm slowly warming up to the Baroness and Isabel, which makes me worry that something bad will happen, and it will more then likely happen to Isabel.

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The very bloody torture scene skeeved me out. And I laughed when Ed Sheeren walked through the door in that hat and he took over as second shift torturer. He looked so out of place to me.

I'm still lost about what's going on with the religious (?) group, rebels, whatever they are.

The Baroness is getting a little more interesting and I like the friendship she has with her servant lady. I thought the scenes with the baby and little boy and Wilkinson were touching too.

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I don't think the show is nearly as bad as some people do, but perhaps even worse, I'm just bored by it. I think Lee Jones is a decent leading guy, but I'm so damn confused and uninvested in everything going on around him. I'll probably stick it out a while longer to see if stuff picks up / comes together, but right now it's all very 'bleh' to me. Sagal's accent is so damn weird (I really love her) and all of the other characters have yet to really come to life for me. 

 

Verdict is still out on this.. 

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I don't think the show is nearly as bad as some people do, but perhaps even worse, I'm just bored by it. I think Lee Jones is a decent leading guy, but I'm so damn confused and uninvested in everything going on around him. ... right now it's all very 'bleh' to me. Sagal's accent is so damn weird (I really love her) and all of the other characters have yet to really come to life for me. 

 

Yeah, same here. I think I'm done. I'm not engaged by the show. The only thing I'm really enjoying is Lady Love/Isabel.

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I like the visiting Baron. He had a permanent "somebody just farted" look on his face for the whole episode. To be fair, I probably would too if I had to spend a day hanging with the chamberlain.

The French aren't going to win any popularity contests on this show. I can tell.

Now I see why Mrs. Executioner was willing to accept the new husband. It's not because she saw it as an upgrade. It's because she's friggin' nuts, and really thinks that it's the same guy. And then Bad Things happen when he doesn't act like she was expecting. Maybe Lead Guy should have his son go be Father Breve's assistant, which would get him out of the hut with the crazy lady and give him a chance to learn to read.

I get the impression that the writers think that lopping off limbs and heads is easy to do.

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I kept getting distracted and loosing place in whatever the story was.  What was the snake all about?  How the hell did a man of the executioners rank have the ability to read, nevermind afford his own bible?  I am just lost.

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I would like this show a lot more if they stopped graphically showing limps getting cut off, and people getting tortured so much. Granted, I know its kind of the point of the show, but its just getting gross. 

 

Other than that, I am actually getting interested in the plot, historical issues or not. I still really like all the scenes of the Baroness and her handmaiden/BFF. I find their relationship to be by far the most interesting part of the show. 

 

The Main Guys new wife is CRAY CRAY. Like, dear lord. 

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I just don't think this is as bad as everyone here does -- certainly not enough to give up on it -- but I did see some cracks in this episode.  Just about any scene in the woods and the acting went right down the loo.  Wow.  Was that bad.

 

Otherwise, I'm cool with the show.  It's not great but it's not bad.  Like everyone else, I like the Baroness but I'm not at all interested in her relationship with Devoted Maiden.  I get nothing, see nothing, and really don't care where it's headed.

 

While I'm not sure why Gemma and Otto live in a cave -- I AM sure "Hanging Dead Snake Curtain" isn't in Martha Stewart's design portfolio.

Edited by Captanne
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Well, the one thing the show got right was making Piers Gaveston just about as annoying as I always thought he would be. 700 YEAR OLD SPOILER...You can totally see why the English nobility got so pissed off by his attitude that they chopped off his head without trial. Surprised show did not spell out that he and Edward II were lovers. I thought they would go there for sure. Sad we did not meet Queen Isabella. She would have got on well with the Baroness.

 

Can Katey Sagal's character get killed off? No? :(

Edited by brisbydog
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Surprised show did not spell out that he and Edward II were lovers.

I expect this will come up in a future episode. After all, we can't expect the writers to pass up an opportunity for some drama and gratuitous nudity.

 

It just struck me that the episode title is particularly apt. Both the visiting Baron and Gaveston are hungry for land, Corbett is hungry for power, and Lady Love is literally hungry.

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Okay then.  I just watched this episode.  First, I finally get what folks are saying about Lady Love and her hand maiden.  They are cute.  I think it's because both of them are good actresses in their own rights.  That's nice to see.

 

Anyone else having problems reading the stupid font on the location identifiers?  The hell?

 

For some reason the torture scene affected me the way it was supposed to -- horrific and OMFG and eww -- but I just finished watching all of Hannibal so forgive me for being a bit numb.  It just didn't bother me that much.

 

Lastly -- such bad acting in the forest.  Wow.  So bad.  Does anyone else keep thinking the trapper (the kid with the sheep) is an elf?  I keep jumping genres whenever he's on screen.

 

ETA:  I'm thinking that those who don't appreciate the violence (iow those who, justifiably so*, say, "Too much torture.  I'm outta here.") came for the Dungeons and Dragons but didn't watch Sons of Anarchy.  For me, this is pretty tame for Sutter.  Tig's daughter, anyone?  Bobby Elvis in the jail cell?  (The former was burnt alive in a pit in a sand lot construction site at the piers near Stockton, CA and found by her father.  Bobby Elvis had several fingers removed by Bad Actors in an abandoned jail cell.  Wasn't his whole hand finally cut off and an eye removed?  Oh, yeah, not to mention our own Otto -- the witch's male counterpart in Bastard -- bit his own tongue off.  But not after also losing an eyeball.)

 

*Those who are too horrified to watch -- you're better off for it.  I applaud your sensibility.  Sadly, I watched all of SoA and have become inured.  

Edited by Captanne
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I'm enjoying the plots and subplots all along, thanks be for subtitling.  However, the accents are beginning to get ucontrollably laughable.  When did Pepe Le Pew get hired as the King's Greeter?  And how did Carrot Top get to be in charge of the United Kingdom?

 

One other thing.  For the second time (won't happen again), I got cut out of the last 10 minutes or so due to DVR settings.  Did anything extraordinary happen after the door opened to show the Forest Urchins in the jail?

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All I remember is that the Elf, the Moor, and the Goon were put in a hole with a grate over it.  

 

There was a moment when the naked Witch marked another Seraph off the hanging skin artwork in her cave.  The one with the tree on it.  She took a stone and "x"d it off as she has others before.  I'm sure it's meaningful that the X was more like a Cross.  (Forgot to finish this thought -- as she crossed the guy off the tree, she stood back and crossed herself then started muttering what looked like a prayer.  She may know the Quran, but I think she's supposed to be either Druid or Christian.  The crossing implies Christian to me.)

Edited by Captanne
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Anyone else having problems reading the stupid font on the location identifiers?  The hell?

So am I.  I watched reruns last night because I'm trying to get into this show, but I couldn't read the damn locations.

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Otherwise, I'm cool with the show.  It's not great but it's not bad.

 

Since we've been living in this golden age of television, golden in the sense that there is original content year-round, golden in that you don't have to be present in front of the tv when a show airs; you can record it, watch it on multiple platforms, even wait till its on a streaming platform, I don't know why it is, but a show either has to be the best thing ever or it is an utter failure. Just statistically, there's still going to be the same % of great shows, so that means less overall, but there will be a whole lot more of the "not great but not bad shows", which there really are. My hypothesis is that since it's really easy to access spoilers or get information about a show before it airs that overall viewers have their own expectations prior, and any show rarely will live up to so many different expectations. 

 

So, it's ok. I watch it on the weekends when I have more time to watch. There's legit criticisms of the show to be sure, as there are with literally every show on tv. I don't know much about the time period, so it's just a bit of fun. I'm enjoying Bill trying to gain favor with the Baronness when she clearly likes the executionor better. And he's totally oblivious. 

I found it hilarious that the new wife was all like, "Oh husband, you're so great." "Uh, you don't have to do that when we're alone." "Oh, husband." 

 

I assumed in the first episode tat the black dude was a Moor and a Muslim brought back from a crusade.

 

Well, yes, they stated that in E2. 

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Anyone else having problems reading the stupid font on the location identifiers? The hell?

Yes, I've been rather annoyed at having to stop the show to squint at the screen. Maybe someone needs to tell them that fancy medieval-style lettering needs to be significantly larger if it's going to be as readable as a normal font.
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I am also having a terrible time understanding the actors.  My closed captioning is not working for an unknown reason, and that has always been my savior with these kinds of shows.  I do love hearing the singsong Welsh accents, but I don't know what they're saying.  I thought the trapper with the sheep was a really ugly woman, and since I didn't understand anything s/he said, it took until maybe the third hour that I realized it was a guy.  Color me confused.

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I'm profoundly deaf so I take closed captioning for granted.  You're not missing much of the "Welsh" accents.  You'd do better to watch something genuinely Welsh -- "Hinterland" (Y Gwyll) is good if short.  Here in the states -- at least on Netflix -- we only have the 6 episodes of the first series.

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ETA:  I'm thinking that those who don't appreciate the violence (iow those who, justifiably so*, say, "Too much torture.  I'm outta here.") came for the Dungeons and Dragons but didn't watch Sons of Anarchy.

 

I loved every minute of SoA and don't usually shy away from violence. But that show had compelling characters and story lines; to me, this show does not. The violence here seems more like torture porn; there isn't even any sick glee in what can be gotten away with. Spartacus had plenty of gore, but (to paraphrase the Duke of Argyll talking to Rob Roy) by God it had a style to it.

 

Of course that's just me, YMMV.

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I loved SoA, too.  Loved, loved, loved it.  Even at its weakest points. 

 

I did find Tig's daughter's story* and Bobby Elvis' end to be almost too much.

 

*I liked that it was balanced with Tig being the primary one to find happiness at the end. 

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I think this is kinda bad.  I've read the Hangman's Daughter books and I know that executioner's and their families were usually shunned.  Yet, Lady Love is willing to hug him in a cathedral while his fake wife looks on.  It's not that credible.  The main character just looks conflicted.  Seriously, crazy woman thinks he's her husband, look conflicted.  The chamberlain is coming up with twisted plans to get you to kill his enemies...look conflicted.

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This is the episode that lost me. I couldn't understand anything the annoying French guy said. I'm still having trouble following what's going on with whatever Stephen Moyers character is. It was boring, or maybe I'm just not interested anymore. That's all.

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I'm still in for Lady Love and Isabel's scenes together and my desire to see the chamberlain meet a grisly end. Why is it that chamberlains in fiction are always the bad guys? What I'm most afraid of, now, is what Gaveston said would happen to Love if she was discovered in her deception, and that Wilken would be ordered to do the deed. Is it wrong that I don't hate Witch Bundy? I'm actually growing to like She Of The Hideous Accent.

 

Of course this show is still an utter trainwreck overall but it still manages to hold my attention long enough for me to come back next week.

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Did Brattle keep the bible from the burning carriage? Seems like that could turn out to be important evidence.

 

Gaveston just makes friends with important people everywhere he goes, doesn't he? First the Baroness, now the chamberlain. No wonder he wants a bolt-hole.

 

Prichard is the worst wing man ever. When your friend's wife comes looking for her husband, the correct response is not to point her in the direction of the place where he's getting frisky with the Baroness.

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Finally got around to seeing this, and a lot of that was simply because I waited till the commercial-lite On Demand version, instead of the normal an hour and thirty minute running time.  I know FX shows are known to go over, but I swear, this one might be the longest.  I heard Sons of Anarchy was the same, so is Kurt Sutter just in a contest to see how many times he can over and how long he can do so, before FX tells him to cut it out?

 

I did like seeing Milus get played and come out as the loser of the episode, although I'm sure that was short-lived.  I'm sure he'll eventually figure out the twins are playing him, and they'll both get brutal deaths.  But I guess Milus really doesn't care who he has to sleep with or who he needs to blow, in order to get ahead.

 

Love and Isabel continue to be my favorites, but I worry that Love is going to push her luck too far.  I agree with what was suggested upthread, that this could totally end with Wilkins being forced to execute her or something.  This show would totally do that.  That's assuming his crazy "wife", doesn't try to shank Love first, after seeing them hugging.

 

I can't make heads or tails of Wilkins' dream sequence/nightmare with his dead wife.  She comes out of the ocean, gets naked, falls down a hole, and then is suddenly half-burnt?  Ok........

Edited by thuganomics85
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Oh, I'm convinced Isabel is short for this world and it will be ugly.

 

I am also completely baffled by Brattle (Brittle?)'s dream sequences.  I wish that wife would just die already.  This lingering around like a "watery tart" (cue, Monty Python) is getting old and meaningless.

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This lingering around like a "watery tart" (cue, Monty Python) is getting old and meaningless.

Heh. I'm kind of partial to "moistened bint" myself.

 

Oh damn, now you've got me thinking of Python, and this show is perfect for Python references.

Edited by Sandman87
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I stopped watching after the first episode but I've continued reading this board.  By the number of posts, it looks like I was not alone in dropping this show! 

 

I watched the first 2 eps of "The Last Kingdom" and I am hooked!  THAT is how a medievil show should look (along with Vikings, GoT...anything but Kurt Sutter's attempt).

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I found this to be the most entertaining so far. I don't find the gore to be over the top. I mean, compared to Outlander, this is the Muppets. So, that might say something about me, but I don't really care. I got home from a long day at work, which I'm sure everyone else does too, and I was entertained for an hour or so. That's what the show is, nbd for me. I don't know if it's because I watch a lot of UK tv either, but I don't have issues with the accents. 

 

The Main Guys new wife is CRAY CRAY.

 

I mean, like, what. Last time I thought she was playing the role, because he was like, "uh you don't need to do that when we're in the house." But *dayum.* I liked the scenes with the BA and the boy. Poor kid must have lived life in total fear. Then he brought him home a little toy horse. Those scenes were all well done.

 

Lady and her BFF were the epitome of buddy trip, hilarity ensues. Earlier, there was some discussion about why she'd still be around since she's a woman whose noble husband died. Seems like they took a little time, but are addressing it. At the end when the Lady bluffed about being pregnant, the handmadien's reaction shots were priceless. 

 

Chamberlain Bill's scheming was quite funny too. "Well, yeah, I don't *want* your wife to die, but still, you know, she does, there's this woman here, land, my guys who are beating up your guys like nbd."

 

I'm not watching the show for historical accuracy; I mean, there's witches. I like documentaries, and I'll watch them for that. 

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I'm not watching Outlander because I can't cope with the soap opera -- also I'm not much for time travelling to find a hunky guy in a skirt.  I feel like it's ... I dunno ... boringly unoriginal.  (My family is Scots and Welsh so I'm all for Scotland and Wales, don't get me wrong, I just don't .. get into ... Outlander.)

 

ANYway, I'm interested to hear it's MORE violent than this show.  That surprises me no end.  I wouldn't think a soap opera would be so violent.  (Of course, I don't think this show is all THAT violent, either.)

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In the sense that "torture porn" is being thrown around or implying that people who reasonably enjoy this show have something wrong with them, these were also thrown around during Outlander especially for the last two episodes. I wouldn't call it a soap opera more than Claire Won't Shut Up Again And Now The Guys Have To Clean Up Her Mess. Even the wedding wasn't the typical soapy wedding. 

 

I wouldn't compare the two shows beyond that and both are set in a brutish world. The characters in Outlander are more fully drawn, mainly because with more running time you have the opportunity to write more of those scenes, and it can be psychologically *dark* plenty of times. Although, like the Lady on this show, they do a decent job showing how awful it was for women back then.

 

Suffice it to say if this show is considered torture porn, then Outlander is a flat out snuff film.  

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