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S09.E04: Will's 5th Birthday


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I liked the party venue, but I thought that Will and his young crowd were maybe a little too young for that venue. I also hope off screen that some of the other kids got to do things like touch the magnet ball because while it was Will's party, I can't imagine it would be fun to be 4 - 5 and just sit and watch Will do ALL the cool things.

I thought so as well. The kids seemed like they were having the most fun when they were just wrestling on the floor and running around. I think the big party was more for the show anyways. I also wonder if many of Will's classmates didn't attend because the parents didn't want their children to be on camera.

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Bill said somewhere, I think on his Twitter when he & Jen were Live Tweeting during the episode (but it may have actually been in 1 of his "Talking Head" type comments in the ep), that Will's outgrown afternoon naps now (though Zoey still takes them), so now he & Will get in a little extra "bonding" time in Will's old nap time. I think that's cool, for some reason.

I'm 51 and still haven't outgrown my afternoon naps.  ;)  It's one of the best parts of the day.  A beautiful summer afternoon, with the breeze blowing the bedroom curtains in.  A nap is just heaven on earth.

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(edited)

I loved when the man leading the party asked if Zoey wanted to come up, and help with the 'hot air balloon", and Will shouted out "YES!"

 

He wanted his sister up there with him.  I loved that.  :)

Edited by Honey
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I noticed for the first time that Will is calling Bill "Daddy". I wonder why that changed.

 

He's in school now, where he hears kids saying "Daddy" and probably not "Baba." It's a good change. It shows Will's assimilating. But Bill can always be "Baba" in Will's heart and memory. 

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(edited)

I'm 51 and still haven't outgrown my afternoon naps.  ;)  It's one of the best parts of the day.  A beautiful summer afternoon, with the breeze blowing the bedroom curtains in.  A nap is just heaven on earth.

 

Amen! I have 5 younger siblings and we're all close in age, so just to get some peace, my Mom would pack ALL of us off for an afternoon nap. Even though, as a 6, 7 and 8 year old, I most definitely objected to this. Yes, my 2-year old sister needed her nap, but I didn't!  Made me crazy then. I could never sleep, but I don't have that problem any more. LOVE my afternoon naps, especially Summer afternoon ones like Honey described. In a hammock too - sublime.

Edited by Wellfleet
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(edited)
Amen! I have 5 younger siblings and we're all close in age, so just to get some peace, my Mom would pack ALL of us off for an afternoon nap. Even, as a 6, 7 and 8 year old, I most definitely objected to this. Yes, my 2-year old sister needed her nap, but I didn't!  Made me crazy then. I could never sleep, but I don't have that problem any more. LOVE my afternoon naps, especially Summer afternoon ones like Honey described. In a hammock too - sublime.

 

Yes.  Love those afternoon naps too. 

 

Wellfleet, your story reminds me of  opening my parents' bedroom door when everyone was supposed to be napping...I thought I had forgotten that.  Thanks. : (

Edited by zenme
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Amen! I have 5 younger siblings and we're all close in age, so just to get some peace, my Mom would pack ALL of us off for an afternoon nap. Even, as a 6, 7 and 8 year old, I most definitely objected to this. Yes, my 2-year old sister needed her nap, but I didn't!  Made me crazy then. I could never sleep, but I don't have that problem any more. LOVE my afternoon naps, especially Summer afternoon ones like Honey described. In a hammock too - sublime.

I was made to take an afternoon nap when I was younger too! I never understood the importance of a nap until I got old; now I look for any excuse to take one! Lol

There was a table clearly identified as "GIFTS" at the venue so gifts were expected.

Oh, I'm sorry! I missed that part! :-)
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Seeing those kids on the counter made me a little nervous. Zoey was even kind of playing with the mixer.  I thought oh gosh i hope she doesnt turn it on with her hand in there. I hope they can get those kids to not climb up there. Maybe it is because they saw Jen climb up there but still.....

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There was a table clearly identified as "GIFTS" at the venue so gifts were expected.

Chances are that was placed there by the venue. My daughter just got married, and the venue placed a "gifts" sign on a table in the foyer. I thought that was a little gauche, actually.

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Chances are that was placed there by the venue. My daughter just got married, and the venue placed a "gifts" sign on a table in the foyer. I thought that was a little gauche, actually.

I cringed when I saw the gift sign at Will's party. When the family arrived it looked like all the decorations were in place, so I think you're right that the venue placed the sign. It was definitely tacky, I would have removed it.

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(edited)

Jen honestly expected Will to stop playing with his remote control toys to sit and watch her send the invitation. I don't think she understands children at all.

Lol, Will is so typical of 99.9999% of all males on the planet. When it comes to parties they love the food and fun but could care less about the preparation and details. I remember the first Thanksgiving dinner I hosted with my fiance and I flipped out on him because he hadn't set up the kids' table prior to the arrival of our guests. His response was "what's the big deal? We're not even eating yet."

Edited by BitterApple
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Chances are that was placed there by the venue. My daughter just got married, and the venue placed a "gifts" sign on a table in the foyer. I thought that was a little gauche, actually.

 

That's my bet as well. I've been to a few events at venues where they had signs like that.

 

As far as them not taking it down, they may not have even noticed it as they had a lot of other things going on. Or, they tried... one venue I saw a sign like this was a wedding, the bride asked family to take the sign down so they did and just put it behind the table - the people at the venue hastily put the sign back up.

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(edited)

Well, we really don't know at what point that sign was there.  They could have filmed it during prep before the party but perhaps it wasn't there by the time the party started.  It's all in the editing.

Edited by Kohola3
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This was brought up on another thread. The poster made a very good point and I think it's worth discussing here. When Bill was at physical therapy, his therapist was teaching him how to prepare if Will pushed him. I think it's disgraceful that a father has to work out to defend himself against his son. Wouldn't the better parenting move be to teach the child not to hurt his dad?

Jen will soon be smaller than Will. He could easily hurt her if he's not taught boundaries. I think that they need to teach Will that he needs to be gentle with his parents.

 

The physical therapist was teaching Bill how to handle Will pushing him because Will is a five year old who even with reminders may forget that his dad isn't physically up to snuff. He's five. He's not likely to give perfect compliance even if he wants to, because young children are clumsy and get rambunctious and have difficulty controlling themselves because they aren't tiny adults, they're children.

 

The therapist is showing Bill what to do because it pays to be cautious and not to assume that a five year old has perfect understanding and perfect self control. This is not happening because Bill and Jen have decided as parents that they simply don't want to bother with teaching Will to not hurt them, that they'd rather risk Bill being paralyzed than bother to discipline their child.

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I don't know a single 5 year old that has total control of his body at all times.  Running full speed is a characteristic of that age and they honestly don't know their own strength.  Short of a ban on EVER touching an adult, accidents will happen.

 

Even adults can be thoughtless, hugging someone with a bad shoulder or bumping against someone with a bad knee.  It's not intentional although it hurts like hell.  Having just had a knee replacement I can vouch for the number of ways accidents can happen!

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Bill also rough houses with Will. We saw that after the birthday party. Will could hurt Bill while they are playing. He doesn't do that to Jen cause Jen doesn't interact with him that way.

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A few of the worst moments have presented and i had been hopeful they wouldn't. Will is still hitting and pushing Bill &Jen. Zoey is really being overloked, after her fall on the fireplace, i was horrified when she walked on the counter, i mean hey yeah let's jeapordize the doll for entertainment. Lastly OMG, when gifts came home for Will to open, it was natural for Zoey to want to be able to participate. Will screamed, i was horrified when i saw Bill seem like he was pulling Zoey under his arm but I fell sick and cried when i slowed down the show, Bill hrabs her so tight pulling her harsh under his arm and away from a toy while Willy enjoyed to continue unwrapping but poor sweet Zoey cried her heart out, layed down forward on the floor so pitifully. I jist could not believe what i saw

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Why at Wills party was Zoey placed a different table? At hers he got in on all the great action and now she was separated. He went to her birthday cake last year and stuck his fingers in while he amped up fpr the first piece of Zoeys cake. Why is Zoey always coming in last for everything? &She is beginning to notice, during the pudding, Will mase his and put things in hers? She wanted to create her own but looked afraid to ask. Then Bill played with Will in thw jello while she sat far away like usual and cried our i too i too, that sucks in my book. How about when they were playing in cookie dough and Jen, Bill her mim and Will just laughed, giggled, and he even ate dough many times after being told no.Zoey wanted to play too but whike they continued to ignore this sweet lil baby doll, she put flour on her cheek like nainai did with Will, she tickled herself and even giggled and simulated what they did. I wish Zoey lucked up and got a grrat family who loved hee as much as everyone loves Will

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Both Will and Zoey have called Bill Daddy, Jen and Bill quickly correct him and remind him that Bill is Baba. Maybe its because of all the mugs and T shirts already printed saying Baba. Its ridiculous, parents and kids wont like it much, for goodness sake they are American kids living in Texas. Its sad. Let the kids enjoy life.Stop making them show horses.

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(edited)

Will screamed, i was horrified when i saw Bill seem like he was pulling Zoey under his arm but I fell sick and cried when i slowed down the show, Bill hrabs her so tight pulling her harsh under his arm and away from a toy while Willy enjoyed to continue unwrapping but poor sweet Zoey cried her heart out, layed down forward on the floor so pitifully. I jist could not believe what i saw

I just could not believe what I just read! Just wondering if we watched the same show or there was another version of the video that I didn't see. Bill didn't tightly pull Zoey neither Zoey cried in the scene you mentioned.

Edited by iamkarski
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(edited)

This was brought up on another thread. The poster made a very good point and I think it's worth discussing here. When Bill was at physical therapy, his therapist was teaching him how to prepare if Will pushed him. I think it's disgraceful that a father has to work out to defend himself against his son. Wouldn't the better parenting move be to teach the child not to hurt his dad?

Jen will soon be smaller than Will. He could easily hurt her if he's not taught boundaries. I think that they need to teach Will that he needs to be gentle with his parents.

 

I really hope Bill and Jen [bill especially] are firmer with Will at home than we usually see on the show. Jen is definitely the stricter parent, and it doesn't seem to bother her either. She knows she wants Will to be a well-behaved child and she's going to have to do things that will sometimes make her unpopular with Will in order to achieve that. Bill pays lip service to this concept but also seems to look for excuses to ignore, trivialize or rationalize bad behavior. Bill is reluctant to lose his status as Will's "best buddy." I think he realizes he needs to be a Dad, not a buddy, but he doesn't seem willing to be firm - no smiles or chuckles - if it means Will will pout or scowl at him. Will is five now, still cute and very amusing to Bill. But Will at ten doing these things will not be cute or amusing - to anyone. If Will was in my classroom, we would definitely be working on boundaries, respect for others and for authority. Which is one reason I was glad to see him enrolled for karate. IMO, the karate teacher was excellent and clearly has years of experience handling young children. I hope Bill picks up some pointers from him.

 

Edited to add: I still think Will has made a lot of progress even in the last year, and his immaturity issues should lessen as he grows and especially gains socialization at school, at his karate class etc. If I were Bill and Jen, I would keep him one more year in a pre-school setting. I don't think kindergarten now would be the best move for him.

Edited by Wellfleet
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Will does act too young, children hisbage will not gel with him if in secret Jen and Bill keep allowing him to do things like the scene where the baloons were in the air so William immediately sucks his thumbs and lays on Baba. He would never allow Zoey to lay with them. Also Bill would just redirect her, she tries to love on Jen and Bill but they reject her.

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I think Jen has gotten frustrated with Bill when he tries to be the buddy instead of the parent, but I also realize it's hard to discipline your kids with the cameras rolling and a million viewers watching.

I did notice at the party that most of Will's friends were girls. He seems to be a little behind for his age, and given how territorial he is over possessions, I wonder if that's prevented him from making friends with other boys.

Zoe on the other hand is much more reserved and mature, so I think it's not so much that she's overlooked as she just isn't as needy. Even as a toddler she can curl up on her own with a book and be okay.

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(edited)

I think Jen has gotten frustrated with Bill when he tries to be the buddy instead of the parent, but I also realize it's hard to discipline your kids with the cameras rolling and a million viewers watching.

I did notice at the party that most of Will's friends were girls. He seems to be a little behind for his age, and given how territorial he is over possessions, I wonder if that's prevented him from making friends with other boys.

Zoe on the other hand is much more reserved and mature, so I think it's not so much that she's overlooked as she just isn't as needy. Even as a toddler she can curl up on her own with a book and be okay.

 

I am not sure the avoidance of discipline is limited to on camera and if it is then time to call "It's a Wrap!"  Jen and Bill need to reexamine their interests in pursuing a show if it is getting in the way of raising children who came with more challenges than most other parents have to deal with.  The past was the orphanage which no one can change, the present is the filming and they have full control.  

 

Will's behavior is that of a 2-3 year old who has no boundaries.  His parents try to avoid meltdowns rather than deal with them.  First, Bill gave Zoey Will's birthday book because he was busy doing something else in his room anyway, Will has a meltdown and Jen comments to Bill "oh boy that was the wrong thing to do..." then she proceeded to negotiate with Will, he was clearly having none of that.  Bill said how sympathetic Will was after his back surgery, asked every day about it yet Bill has to sit down for a minute when Will is not using his chair and another meltdown and again Jen says "oh boy here he goes...."  Will sends Bill to timeout, hits his leg at one point when he tries to get up,  then pushes him back yelling NO!  Wow!

 

They are giving Will all the power.  Good luck to his future teachers! 

 

ETA: grammar

Edited by Foghorn Leghorn
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Will does act too young, children hisbage will not gel with him if in secret Jen and Bill keep allowing him to do things like the scene where the baloons were in the air so William immediately sucks his thumbs and lays on Baba. He would never allow Zoey to lay with them. Also Bill would just redirect her, she tries to love on Jen and Bill but they reject her.

Sorry, I'm not understanding this. You're saying Jen and Bill rejected Zoey??

Both Will and Zoey have called Bill Daddy, Jen and Bill quickly correct him and remind him that Bill is Baba. Maybe its because of all the mugs and T shirts already printed saying Baba. Its ridiculous, parents and kids wont like it much, for goodness sake they are American kids living in Texas. Its sad. Let the kids enjoy life.Stop making them show horses.

Maybe I missed something, but they've been calling him "Daddy" quite a bit lately and I haven't heard anyone correcting them.

That's my bet as well. I've been to a few events at venues where they had signs like that.

 

As far as them not taking it down, they may not have even noticed it as they had a lot of other things going on. Or, they tried... one venue I saw a sign like this was a wedding, the bride asked family to take the sign down so they did and just put it behind the table - the people at the venue hastily put the sign back up.

We took the sign down at the wedding, and it reappeared. I didn't like it, but given that we had 350 guests to entertain, I let it go.

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A few of the worst moments have presented and i had been hopeful they wouldn't. Will is still hitting and pushing Bill &Jen. Zoey is really being overloked, after her fall on the fireplace, i was horrified when she walked on the counter, i mean hey yeah let's jeapordize the doll for entertainment. Lastly OMG, when gifts came home for Will to open, it was natural for Zoey to want to be able to participate. Will screamed, i was horrified when i saw Bill seem like he was pulling Zoey under his arm but I fell sick and cried when i slowed down the show, Bill hrabs her so tight pulling her harsh under his arm and away from a toy while Willy enjoyed to continue unwrapping but poor sweet Zoey cried her heart out, layed down forward on the floor so pitifully. I jist could not believe what i saw

I'm certainly not saying we all have to love this family, but anyone with On Demand or a DVR can see that this scene, as described, never occurred.

My take is that because Zoey was so slow to warm up to Bill, he's very quick to respond to any affection she offers him.

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I'm certainly not saying we all have to love this family, but anyone with On Demand or a DVR can see that this scene, as described, never occurred.

My take is that because Zoey was so slow to warm up to Bill, he's very quick to respond to any affection she offers him.

Responding to the bolded. I admit, I may be wrong about this but I think I remember Bill actually saying as much, in a TH or voice over, in an episode from after Zoey became acclimated to the family & her new home environment. If she wants to show him any kind of affection, he'll accept it whenever it's offered since she really didn't warm up to him, in particular, for (I thought they said, at 1 point) 6 weeks or something after they either took custody of her or got her home to Houston (I forget which it was).

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(edited)

I am fearful Zoey is going to get a trip to the emergency room in the near future. Maybe she is testing boundaries with everyone but I was kind of surprised to see her go to the corner of Will's bed with his book and no one could get her to return it. I recall as she climbed up onto the bed, Will was pulling on her and Bill made Will stop. There will be a time when Bill andJen are not right there to stop him from pulling on Zoey and or slapping her for taking his toys or books. These two kids probably still do not understand the concept of brother and sister. All they know from their experiences in an orphanage or foster home is that another kid is competition for food, affection, attention and possessions. Zoey seems to be pushing the boundaries of independence by climbing on the counter and moving to a spot where no one could easily reach her if she fell. She was sitting next to the mixer and touching the attachment in the bowl. I do not know if it was plugged in but she could really hurt herself. Its clear from ballet class that her balance is not great yet. One fall off that counter and she hits her head and they could have a very serious situation.

Edited by Snow8585
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Does anyone see that all reference from astronaut to race car driver to best dressed is always directed at Will? At nasa Jen said he would be a great astronaut, then she giggles at Will when he does not follow rules. At nasa the sign said restricted. Willi passed it up and what fun time it was ignoring rules and disobeying the signs of the nasa rover area, oh and goody he found keys Jen lets laughand encourage him to put keys into an ignition at five yrs.old the fun keeps coming as long as William gets his way.

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Responding to the bolded. I admit, I may be wrong about this but I think I remember Bill actually saying as much, in a TH or voice over, in an episode from after Zoey became acclimated to the family & her new home environment. If she wants to show him any kind of affection, he'll accept it whenever it's offered since she really didn't warm up to him, in particular, for (I thought they said, at 1 point) 6 weeks or something after they either took custody of her or got her home to Houston (I forget which it was).

We never saw the months after Zoey came home because they coincided with Jen's cancer treatments. There is a several-month long gap, during which a very fragile woman undergoing chemotherapy had to bond with her daughter, which means giving her unconditional love, reassurances and security. We don't know how bad it got, how long it took, or the details. This is a part of their lives that was not recorded on camera, and I for one would rather let them have their privacy in that trying, painful "gap." 

I am fearful Zoey is going to get a trip to the emergency room in the near future. Maybe she is testing boundaries with everyone but I was kind of surprised to see her go to the corner of Will's bed with his book and no one could get her to return it. I recall as she climbed up onto the bed, Will was pulling on her and Bill made Will stop. There will be a time when Bill andJen are not right there to stop him from pulling on Zoey and or slapping her for taking his toys or books. These two kids probably still do not understand the concept of brother and sister. All they know from their experiences in an orphanage or foster home is that another kid is competition for food, affection, attention and possessions. Zoey seems to be pushing the boundaries of independence by climbing on the counter and moving to a spot where no one could easily reach her if she fell. She was sitting next to the mixer and touching the attachment in the bowl. I do not know if it was plugged in but she could really hurt herself. Its clear from ballet class that her balance is not great yet. One fall off that counter and she hits her head and they could have a very serious situation.

I think that Will and Zoey have bonded as brother and sister, they are used to each other and are just typical little siblings. Sibling rivalry is a fact for nearly every family; big brother has certain privileges that little sister doesn't, little sister has her own little privileges that an older brother, of whom more is required, might wish he still had. 

 

My brother and I, at 68 and 66, are still trying to work this sibling thing out. 

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There will be a time when Bill and Jen are not right there to stop him from pulling on Zoey and or slapping her for taking his toys or books.

 

And this is different from every other group of young siblings how?  I grew up in a neighborhood with tons of large families.  We lived in an era where we all played outside, unattended, until the street lights came on.  Believe me, there was plenty of whaling on each other and yet we all survived it.

My brother and I, at 68 and 66, are still trying to work this sibling thing out.

 

Ditto with my 63 year old sister and my 66 year old self. We quit hitting each other quite a while ago but there are still those moments....

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During karate Will acted soooo shy and couldn't dare shout or yell. Shows how manipulative he is and how he knows hes really doing wrong when he does all that to his mommy, daddy and sister. At home he screams at Jen especially, also hitting her, sreaming at the family,pushing Bill but he knew that guy was not going for the Will treatment. You could have put ten cakes there and he wouldn't scream the DON Touch Mine, nope my bet is that goofy grin like duhhh i didnt do dat was all he could muster, oh boy when he gets a teacher like that. Way to go teach....lol

During karate Will acted soooo shy and couldn't dare shout or yell. Shows how manipulative he is and how he knows hes really doing wrong when he does all that to his mommy, daddy and sister. At home he screams at Jen especially, also hitting her, sreaming at the family,pushing Bill but he knew that guy was not going for the Will treatment. You could have put ten cakes there and he wouldn't scream the DON Touch Mine, nope my bet is that goofy grin like duhhh i didnt do dat was all he could muster, oh boy when he gets a teacher like that. Way to go teach....lol

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I was a huge chatterbox at home when I was a kid. Get me outside the house and I wouldn't say two words. I don't think Will is any more manipulative than any other kid. He's young for his age and it shows. Much as I love Zoey going forward I think she is going to be the bigger problem for Jen and Bill. She is wilful, thoughtful, smart enough to know she will never hear the word no from her daddy, intelligent, independent, all wrapped up in a gorgeous package. She is trouble waiting to happen. Will is just a Bubba

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On the counter as Bill and Jen were giving Jello to the kids, Zoey stood behind Will as she soes alot these days and Jen was saying whats this letter Will and Zoey i bet knew because she seemed to be mouthing it and when he said w instead of l she had this look like ugggh, lol. But she seems afraid to try n fit in with her parents and Will thats probably why she gets along with other kids and herself so well. He was saying J e W ow w jewow and she stood behind not uttering a sound but she put this non verbal emphasis on the (L) too cute, but she always looks scared of them.

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I am so glad that some of the posters here weren't around when I was raising my kids.

 

I expect though that you would never have televised your children or your parenting.  I'm pretty middle of the road on how Jen and Bill parent.  I don't think they're the best parents ever, but they are certainly not the worst.  However, since they are on a TV show and accept the payment for displaying their children's behavior and their parenting, I can never fault anyone in the public for expressing their opinion of what they see on a TV show.  It goes with the territory. 

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In reply to zoey on the counter, they just dont seem as scared for her health much. Shes really small and i agree could get hurt awfully bad. During her fall at Christmas i would freak, i wouldn't let any child on a counter and what changed from the time Jen was crying her eyes out over Will getting ear tubes? Whats different between the two that causes auch a different reaction from mom and dad. Is zoey just alot healthier or does will get more attention or favoritism for being a boy? Why was she allowed on thecointer with her arm in a mixer? Jen cried like a baby when he needed his hearing test. Something is amiss here.

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Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. Just because someone doesn't share your own personal opinions doesn't give anyone the right to be rude or condescending. This is the place to respectfully share your opinions. That's why Al Gore invented the Internet.

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I am fearful Zoey is going to get a trip to the emergency room in the near future. Maybe she is testing boundaries with everyone but I was kind of surprised to see her go to the corner of Will's bed with his book and no one could get her to return it. I recall as she climbed up onto the bed, Will was pulling on her and Bill made Will stop. There will be a time when Bill andJen are not right there to stop him from pulling on Zoey and or slapping her for taking his toys or books. These two kids probably still do not understand the concept of brother and sister. All they know from their experiences in an orphanage or foster home is that another kid is competition for food, affection, attention and possessions. Zoey seems to be pushing the boundaries of independence by climbing on the counter and moving to a spot where no one could easily reach her if she fell. She was sitting next to the mixer and touching the attachment in the bowl. I do not know if it was plugged in but she could really hurt herself. Its clear from ballet class that her balance is not great yet. One fall off that counter and she hits her head and they could have a very serious situation.

 

From the last 2-3 shows, the only time I seriously differed with Bill and Jen's handling of events was the kids on the counter. I would have removed both of them immediately with firm warnings that neither was to ever climb up there, unless Mom or Dad was there with them. They probably would have been placed in time-out as well.

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