S10.E20: Duggars' Guide to Love/10.21:Digging In With the Duggars

[Emme]

Jill seemed dead in the eyes. They all did. There is something so not right going on in that family right now.

You called it Fuzzysox!

[jcbrown]

I just got the stomach to watch the interview special. I was beyond disgusted when MEchelle talked about her infamous lawn-mowing incident and mentioned the girls' responsibility to avoid "stirring up desires that cannot be righteously fulfilled." I am SURE they blamed the girls for Josh molesting them. Words fail me for expressing how appalling I find this family.

[BitterApple]

Michelle is such a hypocrite. She stated that women are responsible for defrauding men if they stir up desires that cannot be fulfilled. Well if your 14 year old son gets hot and bothered by his pre-pubescent sisters, then he has a serious fucking problem. That's not someone who makes a "mistake" and is cured, that's a dangerous predator.

I'm sure Michelle has been using the lawn mowing bikini incident to shame her daughters for years.

[Emme]

Did MEchelle really say that Josie's traumatic birth was the HARDEST thing the family has ever gone through? Not "one of the hardest"?

I cannot even begin to imagine what her older daughters, molested by their brother, and seemingly not given the help and support they need, think when they hear that.

No wonder you never see those kids bonding with their mom, touching her lovingly, saying positive things about her... It is her fucking job as a parent to provide a safe place for those kids. Not only safety in terms of keeping from physical harm, but also providing emotional safety. They should know they have been heard. No matter the context - however big or small the issue - her job is to let those kids know their words and thoughts and feelings have value.

I truly hope there is love and support in the future for those kids,

[Gianthambeast]

How sick is it that they made their girls sit there on camera listening to their molester brother pontificate about love and courtship, just to milk out one more episode? 

[bigskygirl]

Please use this thread for talking about the two episodes and not the Josh molestation scandal discussion. The scandal was not mentioned in either episode. Thank you.

[Potato511]

Did anyone else notice Josie sitting on the floor on what looked to be a red bathmat during most of the interview? Was it just a pattern on the carpeting?

It was a pillow.

[PinkSprinkles]

Thank you TLC for showing us the kitchen staff that made the chicken salad without gloves again. UGH.

[SomePity1066]

She didn't have the labor and delivery experience she planned for, which could be a psychological stuck point for her -- one that becomes a barrier between bonding with the infant.

Lord help me, if she has any resentment toward that little boy - ostensibly her crowning achievement and reason for being on this earth, according to their Gothard upbringing - because his birth didn't go "right" or according to her plan, then I don't think she deserves him ! For Pete's sake, she has a CHILD - all she ever wanted ! So it didn't end up being the natural, at-home, no-meds thing you wanted - WHO CARES !!! He's one hell of a whopper of a kid and healthy to boot. She should be crying with gratitude over her blessing !  She just looked distracted and...disinterested.

 

But, if this is maybe PPD, I pray that someone, ANYONE, recognizes the signs and gets her help, and stat ! Gothards may not "believe" in therapy or psychology but to deny her help, if she needs it, could be dangerous. I hope Derrick isn't too immersed in the Kool-Aid to understand that. 

 

Oh, and when Michelle was carrying Israel ? I thought she'd just brought out a tray of sandwiches. WTF WAS that ?!?!

Edited May 26, 2015 by SomePity1066

[Darknight]

Lord help me, if she has any resentment toward that little boy - ostensibly her crowning achievement and reason for being on this earth, according to their Gothard upbringing - because his birth didn't go "right" or according to her plan, then I don't think she deserves him ! For Pete's sake, she has a CHILD - all she ever wanted ! So it didn't end up being the natural, at-home, no-meds thing you wanted - WHO CARES !!! He's one hell of a whopper of a kid and healthy to boot. She should be crying with gratitude over her blessing ! She just looked distracted and...disinterested.

But, if this is maybe PPD, I pray that someone, ANYONE, recognizes the signs and gets her help, and stat ! Gothards may not "believe" in therapy or psychology but to deny her help, if she needs it, could be dangerous. I hope Derrick isn't too immersed in the Kool-Aid to understand that.

Oh, and when Michelle was carrying Israel ? I thought she'd just brought out a tray of sandwiches. WTF WAS that ?!?!

I hope so too. Mental illness is nothing to fool around with.

[lookeyloo]

It strikes me as odd, too, the way especially Jill seems to be with the baby.  Kind of like not getting too close to him.  I read something about Ron Howard's daughter, Bryce Dallas Howard, who had a baby and PPD.  She said as far as she got away from the baby, the better she felt.  Luckily her husband and her mother got her treatment and cared for the baby til she was able to.  I have a family member who had PPD and she held her baby in the very same way, low down, facing away, etc.  I'm not diagnosing, being that I am not a doctor, nor do I play one on TV, but there is no diddling, talking silly, etc.  Maybe this is all for the camera and things are different in real life.  I hope so.

[Joe Jitsu913]

It strikes me as odd, too, the way especially Jill seems to be with the baby. Kind of like not getting too close to him. I read something about Ron Howard's daughter, Bryce Dallas Howard, who had a baby and PPD. She said as far as she got away from the baby, the better she felt. Luckily her husband and her mother got her treatment and cared for the baby til she was able to. I have a family member who had PPD and she held her baby in the very same way, low down, facing away, etc. I'm not diagnosing, being that I am not a doctor, nor do I play one on TV, but there is no diddling, talking silly, etc. Maybe this is all for the camera and things are different in real life. I hope so.

Jill doesn't seem very maternal with Israel. I think she's disappointed that the birth didn't go according to plan (due to her own stupidity), she's sleep deprived and she's underwhelmed. She's been told since birth marrying Prince Charming and birthing babies for Jesus is supposed to be this totally, awesome, precious, amazing, season of life. She wanted to be able to brag about her all natural Earth Mother labor. So I would say she's disappointed and it shows .

[JenCarroll]

I noticed the first time I watched the ep. that the only person having a normal reaction to the baby was Ben. Ben smiled dotingly, engaged with Iz by making eye contact and waving, and nudged Jessa to point out how cute he was. It was notable because it felt like the only normal thing happening in the room. Jill barely looked at her son, Michelle... was Michelle, and Jim Bob talked about himself. But Ben acted just like you'd want an expectant father to be, on seeing his baby nephew.

More on the episode: I've concluded that Jessa is the best performer in the family. She did a really convincing job of acting like a happy newlywed sitting and chatting in a relaxed, loving family environment. She even looked people in the eye. If she hadn't been clutching Ben so tightly he probably has bruises now, I'd never have guessed. Second place goes to Anna, who was giving it her very best but was just slightly off-pitch.

Michelle's cray-cray meter is reaching critical, I'd say. She looked so intense, and weird. Intensely weird. And hey, lady, that's your grandson, not a roasting pan. Oy.

Edited May 27, 2015 by JenCarroll

[BitterApple]

Jill has a totally unrealistic view of motherhood, courtesy of Michelle who did little more than pop out kids and hand them off to their Sister-Moms to be raised. If she's underwhelmed I'm not entirely surprised.

I thought everyone seemed cranky, both in the marrieds interview and the big group interview at the end. Those kids must get tired of repeating the same rote lines and plastering on the same fake smiles every time the camera crew shows up.

[MyPeopleAreNordic]

I think Jill may still be processing the baby's birth.

When I had my son I had complications that left me in the hospital for 3-4 days (thank goodness my baby was fine). The complications weren't something common and were something I didn't even know could happen. Even my doctor, nurse midwife, and nurses were not used to seeing this complication. My husband is a health care worker, and while he doesn't work in obstetrics, it was something he'd never heard of.

I was (and am) head-over-heels in love with my baby, however it was a few months after he was born that I was hit with "Oh shit. That birth experience did not go well. I really did go through a lot." For the first few weeks, I was on autopilot just trying to keep up with caring for my baby when we got home and being thankful he was okay. Once it all sunk in, it was something to confront and process the experience I had during the birth and after. And my birth plan was nowhere near as planned out as Jill's probably was - I just for sure wanted all the pain relief measures. That was it. I can't imagine dealing with a new baby and processing a traumatic birth experience with TV cameras in your face (not to mention your disgusting brother).

There was something freeing about looking back on the birth experience and being able to say "Damn, that sucked" and not feeling guilty about complaining about how the birth went because you & the baby ended up okay. It took me a while to get there. I hope if Jill feels this way she can confront that she had a crappy birth experience without feeling guilty that it didn't go as planned and she can overcome any feelings that tell her she has no right to be upset because she & Izzy are okay.

(And yes, of course Jill made many decisions that probably made the birth more traumatic, but I still feel for her.)

Edited May 27, 2015 by MyPeopleAreNordic

[SopranoKris]

I think the worst part of watching this episode was the "hey, hey, hey" references to sex.  That was SOOOOO inappropriate.  I mean, who talks like that about their parents?  And Bob & Michelle yuk-yuk along with Smuggar doing the same.  That whole exchange just churned my stomach to watch it, knowing what we know now about the molestation.

[Foghorn Leghorn]

I think the worst part of watching this episode was the "hey, hey, hey" references to sex.  That was SOOOOO inappropriate.  I mean, who talks like that about their parents?  And Bob & Michelle yuk-yuk along with Smuggar doing the same.  That whole exchange just churned my stomach to watch it, knowing what we know now about the molestation.

 

Right on!  And the fact they lived it and likely knew then the story was on it's way to the media makes it even worse!

[zenme]

So, if the Digging in with the Dillards episode had baby Izzy at 6 weeks old, that would have been mid-May. The Josh headline came out May 22? The tension was thick...Anna started crying, and I wasn't buying the "I'm pregnant" line.  Ok...so now I really think they knew this scandal was coming around the pike for them.  We had speculated before, but this confirms it for me. 

[CofCinci]

So, if the Digging in with the Dillards episode had baby Izzy at 6 weeks old, that would have been mid-May. The Josh headline came out May 22? The tension was thick...Anna started crying, and I wasn't buying the "I'm pregnant" line. Ok...so now I really think they knew this scandal was coming around the pike for them. We had speculated before, but this confirms it for me.

I agree. They most likely have friends in county government -- or their own attorney - gave them prior notice.

[Joe Jitsu913]

I agree. They most likely have friends in county government -- or their own attorney - gave them prior notice.

I read that the Duggars were notified before the story hit the news. They were notified by the Springdale Police.

[Potato511]

So, if the Digging in with the Dillards episode had baby Izzy at 6 weeks old, that would have been mid-May. The Josh headline came out May 22? The tension was thick...Anna started crying, and I wasn't buying the "I'm pregnant" line.  Ok...so now I really think they knew this scandal was coming around the pike for them.  We had speculated before, but this confirms it for me. 

No, Jill said on this episode, "He is 4 weeks today".