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David T. Cole

Stupid Movies We Watch Over and Over and Over...

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Galaxina - King (Queen?) of bad bad baddy bad bad movies that you must watch. *BONUS* - Avery Schreiber! Also, big horrible fate befell the lead actress, just after release. PM me or google if you don't know. 

 

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Box of Moonlight - Brilliant and charming but weird study in loneliness, personalities, and priorities. Stars John Turturro, Catherine Keener, Lisa Blount, and was Sam Rockwell's big break, playing "Bucky" which I still shout whenever I see him onscreen. I heart this movie big time.

 

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Armageddon - YEAH I SAID IT! I get major couchlock when this is on, though I do have to mute it when Affleck starts in with "Leavin'...". One of the more understated Billy Bob Thornton roles, and a great cast. Buscemi is a wonderful genius/sleazeball.

 

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Armageddon - YEAH I SAID IT! I get major couchlock when this is on, though I do have to mute it when Affleck starts in with "Leavin'...". One of the more understated Billy Bob Thornton roles, and a great cast. Buscemi is a wonderful genius/sleazeball.

 

 

And William Fichtner is hot!

 

Anyone ever see that dumb movie Sol Goode? I remember watching the crap out of it while one of the movie channels I catch kept repeatedly airing it.

 

Watched a Dolph Lundgren interview earlier and they showed clips from Masters of the Universe. Ah, Dolph in a loin cloth. Reason enough for me to watch.

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Watched a Dolph Lundgren interview earlier and they showed clips from Masters of the Universe. Ah, Dolph in a loin cloth. Reason enough for me to watch.

 

Ha! Good times.  He's aged quite well.

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Armageddon - YEAH I SAID IT! I get major couchlock when this is on, though I do have to mute it when Affleck starts in with "Leavin'...". One of the more understated Billy Bob Thornton roles, and a great cast. Buscemi is a wonderful genius/sleazeball.

 

 

 

My first date with my wife was to see Armageddon. 

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If people like military boot camp clichés, then they should absolutely watch Annapolis, starring James Franco. It's jammed with every one of them that they could think of.

 

Moody, scrappy loner who's been told all his life that he can't do it, gets a chance to go to the Naval Academy. When he gets there, he falls in with a misfit bunch of friends (the firey Hispanic, the high-achieving Asian, the out-of-shape but lovable African American), but it soon waging a war against the mean old instructors. One of whom is a raging asshole, the other an elitist who doesn't think scrappy loners like Franco are Navy officer material.

 

But don't worry! Because Donnie Wahlberg is there as a more sympathetic mentor figure, and Jordana Brewster plays the sexy girl instructor who falls for our scrappy hero. Oh, and in the end he gets to fight the elitist instructor in a boxing match to finally prove himself worthy. 

 

It's lame, but I was laughing for most of it.

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Weird Science played on some basic cable channel last night, and of course I found myself unable to switch the channel. Most of it doesn't hold up well on rewatch, but it was worth it just to hear the Oingo Boingo theme song again in its entirety.

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*ahem*

 

Fatal Instinct

 

A perfectly ridiculous movie with Armand Assante pretending to be Leslie Nielsen in a sendup of other trash like Basic Instinct. Perhaps not coincidentally, Sherilyn Fenn's in this one too, playing Assante's secretary who's on the run from her psycho husband a la Sleeping With The Enemy. It's totally stupid, but if you can find the DVD, I suggest giving it a look.

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Weird Science played on some basic cable channel last night, and of course I found myself unable to switch the channel. Most of it doesn't hold up well on rewatch, but it was worth it just to hear the Oingo Boingo theme song again in its entirety.

I love the part where they go to the blues nightclub and Anthony Michael Hall is taking about the girl with the big titties that broke his heart. Then later in the car his friend is driving he goes: "He don't even have his license, Litha!" The voice he uses cracks me up.

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Everyone in my family looks at me funny for knowing ALL the words to TRHPS. Which makes me sad because I totally want to do one of the live reenactments at a theater. No soup for me, I guess.

It's definitely an experience, 00red.

RHPS is pure genius. My kids never understood what is so great abt it, but again, it's better when u actually experience it live.

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Clayton Rohner! Whatever happened to him? I think the last thing I saw him in was that Good vs. Evil show back in the 90s.

OT but I would loooooove to see Good vs. Evil again.

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White House Down has now entered these ranks for me. Channing Tatum maybe not be the best actor and Jamie Foxx may annoy some people, but I bet they had a lot of fun during filming.

 

Also, I'll stop and watch Down Periscope if it's on.  They were on back to back last night, so I watched them both (again!).

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A post in the Music forum reminded me of Into the Night, starring Jeff Goldblum and Michelle Pfeiffer.  I don't watch it over and over, but if I run across it on the tube, I stop what I'm doing and watch to the end.  Lots of great cameos, some intrigue and adventure, and some weird non-romantic chemistry that works. For me, anyway.  

 

Same thing with To Live and Die in LA, which I find to be sort of bad because it's so earnestly trying to be edgy, but it's just too pretty and well put together.  With many lingering shots of various parts of William Peterson, it feels like William Friedkin is crushing on him a little; nothing wrong with that, Peterson is nice to look at.  But there were time I'd think, Okay, you can cut away now.....  I really like John Pankow in the flick, though, and of course Willem Dafoe because he's awesome in everything. 

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Same thing with To Live and Die in LA, which I find to be sort of bad because it's so earnestly trying to be edgy, but it's just too pretty and well put together.  With many lingering shots of various parts of William Peterson, it feels like William Friedkin is crushing on him a little; nothing wrong with that, Peterson is nice to look at.  But there were time I'd think, Okay, you can cut away now.....  I really like John Pankow in the flick, though, and of course Willem Dafoe because he's awesome in everything.

Don't forget the kickin' soundtrack by Wang Chung.
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*ahem*

 

Fatal Instinct

 

A perfectly ridiculous movie with Armand Assante pretending to be Leslie Nielsen in a sendup of other trash like Basic Instinct. Perhaps not coincidentally, Sherilyn Fenn's in this one too, playing Assante's secretary who's on the run from her psycho husband a la Sleeping With The Enemy. It's totally stupid, but if you can find the DVD, I suggest giving it a look.

I'll watch Sliver when it's on, just because.

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You've Got Mail is about to start and I am going to watch it again probably for what's probably the 30th time.

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You've Got Mail is about to start and I am going to watch it again probably for what's probably the 30th time.

 

What channel, I will join you!!!

 

ETA:  I found it!

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Oh gosh. It's gotta be Rat Race. I watch this movie every time I'm home sick. What a dumb movie with a great cast: Whoopi Goldberg, Amy Smart, Breckin Meyer, Cuba Gooding Jr, Seth Green, Jon Lovitz, Kathy Najimy, John Cleese, a hilarious Kathy Bates cameo...and so many others. Plus, a totally cheesy Smash Mouth performance to top it all off? Sheer perfection.

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Addicted to Love - Matthew Broderick and Meg Ryan. Hilarious romantic farce where they team up and spy on their exes using a camera obscura (which is really cool, btw) from an abandoned building across the street. It's completely implausible and totally adorable, in fact it is my favorite Meg Ryan flick after When Harry Met Sally (nothing can touch that one). 

 

My favorite line is a minor one, she brings a potted plant into their crumbling, dilapidated building and he goes "What did you buy that for?" all irritated. She looks at him like he's the stupidest jerk in the world and simply says "It's pretty, Sam." I still use that line all the time and the movie came out in '97. 

 

That, and Zack and Miri Make a Porno are two of my absolute favorite romcoms. Perfect 'sick in bed with the Vicks and the kleenex and eating ramen' - type flicks.

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Another vote for So I Married an Axe Murderer particularly for the father's mean lines about his son with the big head. "He'll be cryin himself to sleep tonight on his huge pillow!"

 

One I always watch is One Crazy Summer. Bobcat Goldthwait tells this random story and at the end his twin brother says admiringly "Isn't that a great story"? My family always says that when someone comes up with something that you don't have an answer to (or, from Joe vs. the Volcano, we say "I have no response to that.")

Edited by Mystery
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So many funny scenes in that one, like the mean kids having their faces frozen, Bobcat Goldthwaite running amok in a Godzilla suit, and Demi Moore fleeing from the cub scout troop so eager to perform first aid that they're mummifying random people with bandages.

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Oh gosh. It's gotta be Rat Race. I watch this movie every time I'm home sick. What a dumb movie with a great cast: Whoopi Goldberg, Amy Smart, Breckin Meyer, Cuba Gooding Jr, Seth Green, Jon Lovitz, Kathy Najimy, John Cleese, a hilarious Kathy Bates cameo...and so many others. Plus, a totally cheesy Smash Mouth performance to top it all off? Sheer perfection.

 

 

I, completely without shame, will tell you that I laughed so hard at the Hitler sequence when I saw it in the theater that I missed some of the dialogue.  

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So many funny scenes in that one, like the mean kids having their faces frozen, Bobcat Goldthwaite running amok in a Godzilla suit, and Demi Moore fleeing from the cub scout troop so eager to perform first aid that they're mummifying random people with bandages.

The kid who joined the army, but was so sensitive that even the sight of a discarded and damaged doll had him in tears wondering about the little girl who had lost it, the uncle who shacked up in a room all summer trying to win the radio money give away, the ugly dog, the car that still had the old Christmas tree tied to the top (am I remembering that right?)....

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Ha, yeah, the car with the dead Christmas tree on top on the first day of summer vacation while the teenage driver wonders why his mother thinks he's so irresponsible. 

 

Oh and the grandmother cooking dinner and then laying a bill on the table while all the kids try not to meet each others' eyes until John Cusack picks it up...

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I will give a box of virtual Thin Mints to anyone who has also seen this movie, because I refuse to believe that I am alone in loving it.

 

Zorro, the Gay Blade.

 

Lauren Hutton, Brenda Vaccaro, Ron Leibman, and Mr. Perpetually Overtanned himself, George Hamilton as the masked hero and his twin brother, Bunny Wigglesworth. No, really.

 

"They say that the Navy makes men. Well, I'm the proof of that. They made me!"

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I think I saw Zorro, the Gay Blade a long time ago, but I'm not sure if I'm confusing it with something else.  Was there a comedy vampire movie where the vampire was a bit on the effeminate side? 

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When we first got cable Zorro was showing all the time!! I loved it as a child. "You recognize that famous sign, no?" " Si, señor, it is the number 2." And Zorro in puce with the fringe on his hat. I don't remember enough to know if it would be considered offensive now, but it was funny back then!

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Let it Ride with Richard Dreyfus, Teri Garr, and Jennifer Tilly. Today someone said "Nothing ventured..." and I finished in my head with Jennifer Tilly's line "nothing.... ventured!" 

 

eta: IMDB says "According to film critic Leonard Maltin, "screenwriter Nancy Dowd had her name removed from the credits." Now that's the sign of a stupid movie!

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Stupid movie?  But Let It Ride has this great Jennifer Tilly line:

"She has very long legs"

"Thanks. They go from my ass all the way to the floor."

 

Speaking of Leonard Maltin, I saw an article he's ending his yearly movie guides. I had no idea it's been going so long- since 1969!

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Ali G Indahouse and Brüno, both of which star Sacha Baron Cohen. Brüno is an interesting case because I was disappointed when I first saw it but I think it holds up better on repeat viewings than Borat does.

 

And while I disagree with the notion that it's a stupid movie, I'll list this one here because of how widely-hated it is: The Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle.

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I watch Dante's Peak whenever it's on, it's a volcano movie with Pierce Brosnan and Linda Hamilton.

Oh man, I'm always watching Volcano (Tommy Lee Jones & Anne Heche) when I see it on.   Every time they're all like "What is this glowing red stuff coming down Wilshire?!" -- it makes me laugh. 

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Okay I am watching Hot Shots Part Deux. I forgot just how much I enjoyed both this and the first one. This along with Major League were my three favorite movies of Charlie Sheen.

 

Dammit now that just reminded me of his movie with Emilio where they are garbage men. I believe it is Men at Work. I haven't seen it in forever but I still liked it.

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Yes, Men at Work.  That movie is laugh-out-loud funny to me, even though it definitely fits the "stupid" part of the thread as well.

 

"Looks like somebody threw away a perfectly good white boy."

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Yes, Men at Work.  That movie is laugh-out-loud funny to me, even though it definitely fits the "stupid" part of the thread as well.

 

"Looks like somebody threw away a perfectly good white boy."

Isn't that line from Better Off Dead, Bastet?

Edited by Cobalt Stargazer
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Better off Dead used something similar - "It's a shame when folks throw away a perfectly good white boy like that" - five years earlier, so Men at Work stole the joke, but it works for me.

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Stupid movie? But Let It Ride has this great Jennifer Tilly line:

"She has very long legs"

"Thanks. They go from my ass all the way to the floor."!

Let it Ride is a great movie. The wife is hilarious. Terri Kerr I think

will watch that movie anytime

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Better off Dead used something similar - "It's a shame when folks throw away a perfectly good white boy like that" - five years earlier, so Men at Work stole the joke, but it works for me.

Oh, okay. I knew it was something along those lines, just wanted to make sure I kind of remembered it. :-)

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Remember, we have a thread that you can post movies you watch over and over that aren't stupid!  ::giggle::

 

That title is so obscure I never would have thought it was movies you love to watch over and over! Poppy Fields? Really?

Edited by wings707

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I keep tuning into Burlesque whenever I come across it in the listings.  It must be the Cher factor, because I'm not a great fan of what Christina Aguilera does with her mutant lungs.

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Heh, 'mutant lungs'. 

 

There's something about watching Cher act that I love. Couldn't care less about her videos or stage performances... but damn the woman is a really good actor. 

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Starship troopers! Love it. It would look great in 3D because the SFX still look almost flawless after all these years.

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I am not a heavy drinker.  But I do indulge.  And I refuse to wake up mush mouthed and with an aching head.  So I tend to come home and stay up for at least an hour and drink more water. 

 

Anyway the point towards this thread is that it seems every time I do this, I turn on the tv and find the Streep/Martin/Baldwin movie It's Complicated is on.  It is a bland movie that never holds up to the obvious strained effort on the parts of the writers to be clever and the actors to be endearing.  Still I find myself staying up into the wee hours to watch it.  And I don't know why.  Because I loathe Alec Baldwin and his over affected throaty whisper acting.  I find Streep's character yet another insult to how women of a certain age are suppose to be and "triumph".  Though her character is no where near as bad as those poor Jane Fonda and ever annoying Diane Keaton have found themselves playing.

 

Plus the three kids crafted of cream cheese puff pastry and a bland creme anglais make me absolutely rage-y with their twee cuteness every time the family gets together as they warble their delight in having it back together....only to scamper off in pathetic tears to hop into bed together when they find out mom and dad having an affair.

 

Jon Krasinski getting high is in fact the high point of the movie.

 

And still I watch.

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That title is so obscure I never would have thought it was movies you love to watch over and over! Poppy Fields? Really?

I know, it wasn't my choice for a title. It was a Glark thing. ::giggle::

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